Don't You Hate It When Guests Won't Leave? (r/AskReddit)

the house guests from Equis just left who have you had in your house that you couldn't wait to see the back of anyone really as the proverb goes guests unlike dead fish they'll start to stink after three days my ex-husband's best friend I'll call him Shawn was this semi employed hippie who was in his thirties and still lived with his mother he came to visit for a weekend but was still there a week later Shawn and my ex did nothing but play video games drink beer and smoke weed all day reliving their college days I guess Shawn had a habit of leaving his used tissues on every available surface and hiding empty beer bottles in the strangest places after he left I found two behind the toilet gross but whatever I was working two jobs at this time my ex was unemployed story for another day and not home very often so Shawn hanging around didn't really bother me all that much at first but one night he pushed my last button I returned home late that evening after having worked my regular job eight hours 9-5 plus four hours at my second job it had been a long week and I was tired I sat down on the sofa and flipped on the TV planning on relaxing a bit before going to bed Shawn came in snatched the remote from my hand and changed the channel without asking I snapped I told him it was my house my TV and since I was paying the cable bill we were going to watch what I wanted to watch he started to argue with me so I threw him out I told him to grab his stuff I wanted him gone in ten minutes to my ex's credit he backed me up I guess he was a little tired of him as well Shawn never came to visit again the firm I worked for at the time inherited this kid from a place across town named Mike he seemed like an all right guy but then he comes over one day early into his transfer at the firm and he never freakin leaves he tells me the next day that he has nowhere to live and wants to know if he can stay with me and my roommate since we had a three-bedroom between the two of us I make an arrangement that he can stay the first month rent free he was completely broke supposedly yet had one of the nicest wardrobes I've ever seen and pay a reduced rate the next few months until he gets back on his feet a completely fair and easy arrangement I thought Michael end up becoming a huge pain in the butt always wanting rides everywhere almost completely hijacking the TV smoking weed in the house when I tell him not to oh and my favorite he used to listen to his rap music on his discman or whatever and would be like who will why why why why EEA a while waving his hands around in your face he did this to me one time while I was driving and I smacked his hand out of the way he also had behavior that I'd say was more odd than annoying he'd buy beer and instead of drinking it in the apartment he'd hide in the apartment complex his bushes and drink it his actions at work were getting bad as well he'd randomly insult people on the phone and accused them of not wanting to deal with him because he was black truth was he was rude dumb and didn't know a lot about WTF he was doing when it came time to pay the first installment of rent he basically tried to dodge me on it for a couple weeks I finally cornered him on the balcony to say I need the money today and his reply was something like oh say you gonna play me like that now how he accused me of trying to con money out of him even though this was the agreed-upon rent situation finally one Saturday afternoon my boss fires him the boss pulls me aside and asks what do we do now since he's living in my place Mike claims he has nowhere to go in the city we live but that he knows people in like Ohio or someplace that same day my boss buys him a greyhound ticket we help him pack and send him right out the door I let a friend of mine who had fallen on hard times crash at my place for a couple of weeks or until you get your feet back under you is what I told him the guy smoked that fake marijuana spice stuff every day in the living room he would make pancakes one day he burned the pancakes and set off the fire alarm in my apartment because he left them on the stove unattended I had purchased the largest container of peanut butter at the store and he proceeded to while making pancakes in the middle of the night place the lid of the peanut butter inside of the drawer where we put our oven and left the peanut butter container out on the counter without the lid would routinely leave a half-full bowl of pancake mix on the counter for me to clean up hardly left the couch for those two weeks I told him he had to look for a job in that I had some stuff to do so he should go to the job fair at the local community college when I got him out of the apartment I went to the store and came back to my apartment about 15 minutes later to have some frickin peace and quiet only to get a text message from him about five minutes later with him saying oh I see you're home already I looked outside and this freaking car was parked in the parking lot guy didn't even go to the job fair found an interview for him to go to only for him to say he went to it's despite once again only being out of the house for about 15-20 minutes and then making up a story about how the interview went I know you didn't go to your interview because it would have taken longer than the time you were gone just to drive there and back much less have an actual interview for a job my roommate and I had a pile of change we would empty our pockets into by the front entry one of the first things he said when he came over was so this is like everyone's changed to use right class a CT I can say however that I learned a lesson about how lazy people can get and it inspires me never to be that big of a pile of crap I've just had two houseguests from Britain one who was born in raised in Wales leave after a visit of several days they were quiet conscious of my husband's work needs he works from home several days of the week undemanding cheerful conversationalists and they tidied up after themselves they brought us a host gift including evil chocolate and good tea and they insisted on taking us to dinner one night someone had apparently told them of a tradition some of our friends have a leaving rubber duckies in our house in strange places including the camo duct in the planter and the devil ducky in the master bathroom shower so they left a Team GB Olympics rubber ducky in the guest bath sink when they headed out terrible colum glad they flew the considerate flag for britain law had a longtime Internet around 8 or so years invite himself to stay with me for a week I had been thinking a weekend I worked very hard to prepare the guest room for him and spite office being flat broke I was spending into our utility money to have him there the entire time he compared my city Portland to his San Antonio and told us how much better si was and why he and his family were hot crap he was on his cell phone to a girl he met almost constantly he showed zero interest in anything I took him to see so I stopped taking him anywhere the last two days I feigned illness and we didn't go anywhere or do anything he didn't brush his teeth the entire time and his breath choked out the entire room wherever he went but the last night he was there we got into what I thought was a safe and intelligent discussion about politics and religion I've known the guy 80 years you'd think this would be a que territory he audibly scoffed rolled his eyes and all without offering any intelligent counter points I told him how incredibly rude it was he tried to apologize but the damage was done I faked being friendly for the rest of his time there drove him to the airport and parked on my dime he never thanked me for having him paying for food and fun nothing suffice it to say our friendship is pretty much non-existent some people are such buttholes when you invite them into your home sometimes I wonder if their parents just failed to teach them the basics that says say please and thank you and if you're not interested in something fake it there's always something to ask about a couple of years ago both my flatmate and I worked at the same nightclub we finished work about 4:00 a.m. and while walking home he got a phone call from an old school friend all I could hear from the call was yep sure just head over by the time we got back to the apartment he was already there waiting let's call him J bear in mind this is almost 4:30 a.m. apparently he had been forced to leave home and he just needed somewhere to spend the night my flatmate out of kindness and sympathy offered him the sofa at this point I was living on the other so far as my room was being painted we went into the flat they chatted for a bit then my flatmate bailed and went to bed I'm shattered and Jays wired on pills for the next five hours I was forced to watch YouTube videos and listen to him playing guitar including but not limited to Mike Tyson interviews EDM videos how-to guides on everything under the Sun every time I came close to falling asleep I was jolted awake by some obnoxiously loud music I ended up telling him to freak off took my duvet and slept in the bath which was undoubtedly my second worst night of sleep ever he stayed for six days all of which I had off work with no money and no sign of him leaving I ended up walking around town all day just to avoid him he didn't shower once in those six days ate all my food and stole some of my comics after he finally left I told my flatmate that he owed me a gigantic favor and promised that if I ever saw Jay again I'd beat the crap out him and the worst part is everyone who knows both him and I say that were are incredibly alike and have a lot in common it almost makes me hate myself my best friend he talked about the intricacies of D&D and Asian religion for nine hours straight he got upset when I needed a restroom break don't get me wrong it was interesting but I don't even play D&D I had to ask a friend to stop talking about well so I could eat my pho I was living in Eugene Oregon at a time and a good friend of mine asked me if it was okay if his girlfriend crashed on my couch for a couple days she was coming down from Portland to visit him and didn't have the money for a hotel and he was still living at home so that was out of the question I said sure no problem she's welcome to stay huge mistake a few days after she arrived he broke up with her and she wouldn't leave ate my food used my electricity and was all around a giant bee I'm normally a pretty mellow person if I got soapy off at her one day that i broke my bathroom window just by slamming the bathroom door to get away from her it didn't help that my roommate was in love with her lead no chance in heck it followed like puppy dog and kept begging me to let her stay I finally Joe had enough one day and went off on my good friend about how she was his problem and he needed to solve it he found out she had a warrant for her arrest in Portland so he arranged to meet her downtown so that they could get back together and moved by bus to California he tipped off one of the downtown security people back when Eugene still had the huge walking Maul letting them know that she had a bunch of drugs on her and a warrant for her arrest they nabbed her and she called me from jail to begged me to bail her out I laughed and hung up the phone on her never heard from her again neither TL DR crazy bebe crazy dude you live in a house built before my country was established that's so frickin cool I love it the fact that there are still buildings that old that you can buy that says ant museums or oddities is awesome it started with just a cup of water he was a punitive that's what hippies from Puna were called when they've spent too much time out in the boonies growing in smoking pounds of weed and forgetting things like common sense leaving when you are asked to basic human hygiene soap deodorant brushing one's hair and appropriate social behavior wearing a shirt in sidebars or on public transpose in my apartment I could not get rid of him I should have asked the police to escort him out I did not have the guts before I knew it he was using Gorilla Glue to hang posters he peeled off power poles on my walls and stringing Christmas lights until the place looked like a spider's web did I see it for the trap it was number he began hoarding buckets of mud caked wine cooler bottles that might be worth something went inside my closet scrap bicycle frames after I gave him a bike he shoved underneath the bed I asked for help with the rent and food the man was 55 he said he couldn't get a job until his parents passed away because no job would give him enough time off to go to their funerals I lost it and hit him numerous times threw him out physically did not matter he needed more time and had nowhere to go not true he was a landowner on another island I was a fool finally when his father fell ill and he flew out I told him he was moving out and then had to involve his elderly mother to get the security keys back after a couple months he returned and stalked me loitering outside the building asking neighbors if he could stay with them several weeks of that and I was waiting for my chance to move out and I took it what a nightmare whenever an electrician or plumbing person comes round I tend to hide in my dark damn corner of my basement cowering and praying that I am not spotted in that they just leave electrician here and I can say from the other side of the fence it's the exact same whenever I'm working at someone's house and they are there watching me I'm just thinking to myself please leave please leave you're making me feel awkward my dad's family I'm of Indian descent so me and my sister have been Americanized pretty well but when they visit good Lord they drink a lot they smell like curry I'm sure you've smelled a stereotypical Indian person before Lal they always give their opinion about everything and expect us to care 1,000% just because they are family and there's a no phobic the race issue doesn't come up often but when it does it's something about black people in their looks that forgive me Lord but [ __ ] do you not own a mirror you hairy big nosed freaks not being xenophobic but do they eat curry for breakfast I saw it on a BBC programme once and was wondering if this was true or not I used to really hate my grandpa when I was a kid he would always pinch my cheeks and talk about old stories and I really hated the cheek pinching one time I was sick so he came and read me a story after pinching my cheek of course the story was so great I decided he wasn't so bad after all [ __ ] I had a second cousin stay with us for six months she's from the Czech Republic I was 17 at a time she was about 25 highlights of her visit were she stayed in my room meaning that I had to share a room with my 13 year old sister for six months she never even thanked us or really acknowledged that this was a huge inconvenience especially considering my sister and I weren't exactly the best of friends back then anyway she stank coming from rural Czech Republic she did not know or care what the utterances she also only showered 1-2 times a week because they're more used to conserving water I guess she immediately became a huge brown-noser to my mom cleaning doing laundry etc however whenever my mom wasn't around she would start ordering us to do things and would be a giant beat of us in our own house one of the reasons she said she wanted to visit Canada was to learn English however she never really left the house and she just spoke Tec with our parents we don't speak much Czech so this came off as really rude and inconsiderate one of these times that she was doing laundry she threw a bunch of my clothes she did not even have my permission to enter my room that were either hand washed cold water only and washed them in hot water immediately putting them in the dryer afterwards she ruined an entire load of my laundry and did not even apologize then because my mom was in love with her my mom got mad at me for being angry because it was a nice gesture freak that I've been doing my own laundry since I was 12 and I never minded it and I also bought all my own clothes so ruining a load of them was expensive she would tattle on us when we did things she knew we weren't supposed to mind you I had incredibly strict parents one of their rules about what we could watch on TV was if your six-year-old brother isn't allowed to watch it you're not allowed to watch it so that got real annoying we only had one phone line and a dial-up internet connection she would spend hours on ICQ MSN talking to her friends and family with no consideration that there were eight other people in the house that would also like to have their turn at the phone internet to top it off she was absolutely zero fun she never tried to talk to us even though we were much closer to her age than my parents or engage us in any way she had absolutely zero interest in getting to know us or even being nice to us she acted so entitled to everything in our home without ever thanking us for anything she never tried to make any friends out the home which was annoying because what's the point of you being a huge inconvenience to this if you're not even going to enjoy the experience of living in a different country and would just constantly complain about how things in Canada were compared to the CR I've never met someone that is so boring and so rude at the same time , she never tried to talk to us even though we were much closer to her age than my parents or engage us in any way at 24 I can relate much more to people my parents age than 17 year-olds heck I could relate to people my grandparents age better than a 17 year old right now I have three run mates two of them are excellent quiet friendly clean do their share of everything this other guy is a total [ __ ] bag he doesn't clean at all and wants people to buy crap he'll go halves on but never does he opened my walled Locker to use my laundry soap which is like $10 for a small jug overseas he says he'll spot me back doubter bag doesn't I take the initiative to take the garbage out when it starts to get full and I found a few water bottles filled with a clear yellow liquid pee freakin pee bottles I'm by no means allowed type but this was horrid and I needed to yell to get some shame factored in he denied it then later I came in to seeing him clear out two more bottles from under his bunk the nasty crap he now laughs and says I'm the one that was being ridiculous he gets on skype at 3:00 a.m. and wakes us up yet when we do anything at a normal time like 7:00 p.m. we're the doubter bags plus he's a total butt to his family back home along with his girlfriend not freaking cool I'm trying to get this bag of crap out of my room and building last winter break I'm 16 my sister 10 my grandmother and my aunt who is also 16 my grandmother is very young since she was a teen mom when she gave birth to my mom visited for Christmas for about two weeks I normally love having them here but my grandma is kinda crazy slightly xenophobic very homophobic very Fundy and very [ __ ] I knew I was in for something well one day when my mom was at work my sister and I were cleaning and my grandma came into the room and just totally started going at us she'd yell things like Captain America's wife you'll fail at life if you continue down the path you want some days I feel like telling you both to jump off a bridge and my god if I tell you to you'll do it you're both spoiled brats with no respect for anyone and so on she basically insulted us both for two hours now I was expecting my aunt to defend us because she lives with this crazy woman our deals with a lot more crap nope they were both yelling at us after a while it was ridiculous and at first I was able to play it cool like your comments don't offend me but then I broke down and cried the hardest I've ever cried and I'm sure my grandmother loved it as a note I'm very respectful and not real stupid or careless or anything I care so much about my future that I try to always make the right choices she doesn't have any right to say what she did anyway she finally stopped and left and I texted my mom asking if my sister and I could live at my dad's house 20 minutes away for the next couple nights she freaked out and said no why can't you just spend time with your grandmother yada yada so I dealt with this crazy woman and her daughter until they left well a week later my grandmother and aunt finally walked out the door to leave for the airport I screamed with happiness when they were gone as soon as my mom got home from work we told her everything and now I might not see my grandmother anymore apparently when I was born my mom made my grandma promise not to act this way around me and any future children and she's broken that promise my roommate and I had a mutual friend asked to stay over for the weekend of course we agree prior to this neither of us had had sleepovers with this guest so we had no warning of her subsequent behavior here are just a few highlights our lovely guests had explosive diarrhea every single day and of course never once wiped it down after she splattered crap everywhere I had already planned on giving up my bed to her the first night as we're hanging out in the living room she says sooo how I'll be doing the sleeping arrangements I say oh I was going to sleep on the couch she replies oh ok where I was going to say I don't like sharing beds then while she's in my room she spills makeup powder all over my bed and floor and doesn't bother to clean it up we had told this guest to feel free to eat whatever's in the fridge the girl makes some food leaves half of it in the pot on the stove and just lets it city entire weekend she eats half hot what's in her bowl then leaves that on our kitchen counter also for the entire weekend never even bothered to at least put it in the sink or dishwasher my roommate and I were so anxious to see this girl go I never expected her to show gratitude she gave me a used English book clearly from a college course she had just taken with a used sticker still on the binding a friend had a two weeks between moving out of her place and moving temporarily to another state I had offered for her to stay with me not thinking she would take it because she kinda blew my offer off saying she would be with another friend well she then took my offer because she couldn't stay with the guy either so she comes and his sort of rude a few times which is weird because I don't know her to be rude for instance she brought stuff from her old apartment that I said I could store in my place no problem or so this includes two men oldie dusty dirty casserole pans that were left under her sink she decides to doesn't ask decides to let them soak in my sink and wash them later at the time I had just mopped and had my mop and some other stuff drying of the sink so I tell her to just stick them on the counter for now she gives me evil eyes and cops an attitude another night I had come back from a late shift and had to go back in the next day for a morning shift she's home already in my bathroom doing whatever she's using my computer to watch a DVD I had a separate DVD player two feet away at the TV it's a DVD of her favorite movie once she watched a crap ton of times ok cool no big deal even though she's in the bathroom watching it so I make myself some food hanging out after a while I decide to go to bed but want to check my email first I asked her if she can put the movie on pause for a bit or watch the rest later she tells me it's almost done and I can wait my favorite though is the bowie knife she was into oddities no problem so Am I when she first came she showed me this big bowie knife that some boyfriend of hers just gave her as a present no problem knives don't bother me much as I have some for cooking anyway one night I come home from work she's not there I jump on my computer start to check Facebook when I see that she's changed her profile picture it's dark and it looks like the picture was taken in my apartment so I click on it and it's her sitting at my computer looking dang evil holding the bowie knife the only light in the room is from the computer the picture looks totally sinister when she left for her trip she left some stuff for me to look after as per our agreement she never came back to get any of it claiming she had no idea what I was talking about and she didn't know she had stuff at my place this included an air mattress that she slept on for two years not sure how you can just up and forget something like that I offered for a while to even bring her stuff to her but she never got back to me oh well I cannot imagine sleeping on an air mattress for two years my ex-wife was friends with Wayne and Michel Coyne Wayne Coyne is the lead singer of The Flaming Lips and there were both nightmares my wife thought they were cool just because they acted weird but it became annoying as crap real quick they came over one night for a late night drinking session and Wayne was unbelievably annoying and obnoxious I can't stand people acting weird just for the sake of being weird when really they have nothing interesting to say oh yes the old accentuates an eccentricity because you're actually devoid of a personality trick I'm going to go opposite my roommate Mike when I was around 20 years old was a great guy and we hung out Lots he had this one friend who I wasn't a huge fan of but he was a chef and big into the heavy metal scene so the guy loses his job and asks Mike if the guy could come live with us for a couple days while he gets organized a couple days ended up being two three weeks or so forget exactly and Mike kept apologizing and saying it won't be long now but the crazy thing was I didn't mind the guy was a chef he cooked and cleaned and we had awesome food while he was there Mike kept apologizing and I kept saying I didn't mind but I think he thought I was just being I was just being I was just being I was just being I was just being I was just being I was just being I was just he left later and went touring with a big heavy metal concert tour as the head chef TL DR heavily tattooed heavy metal rocker came to live just for a day or two and everything turned out good I've had a couple of bad housemates but one just managed to get under my skin like nobody else she moved in once she started dating our rather housemate her boyfriend is a fantastic guy who was a great person to live with in the three years I knew him so if anything I was happy he was in a relationship she was nice enough at first but after a while it became really hard not to dislike her but she cleaned the downstairs the first weekend which was nice and sit tended to get messy with six people living in the same place then she stopped cleaning and just started leaving notes about how messy we were like every week just passive-aggressive notes about the floor or notes literally left on top of food someone may have spilled and not noticed god forbid she used that time to get a paper towel and clean it up it's not like the place was a pigsty she was the only one that would consistently get pee off about it I should also mention that the rest of us were usually busy as we were all full-time students with part-time jobs while she went to school part-time and refused to even look for work from there on she just became more of a troll that lived on the third floor because she was extremely overweight he would use every excuse not to come down the two flights of stairs her boyfriend would make for her nearly every night and carry both plates up to her if we wanted to go out somewhere with her boyfriend he was a pretty good friend at that point it would turn into a drama because she would refuse to walk anywhere the only time I'd see her was because she liked to use my 360 to play a few games which would be fine except she were basically refused to get off the console even though it was on the main TV we all shared in the common room I actually hid some games of mine and pretended they were lost a first in the four years of sharing my game consoles with run mates eventually she broke up with our friend and moved away naturally not even trying to get anyone to fill in her space to help us pay rent we couldn't complain too much all of us were just glad to get rid of her at that point roommate from heck was an ex friend of mine this was after trying to help her for months at one point my GF and I let her crash at our place for two weeks while she sorted her life out before she went into full crazy mode we went away for the first five days of that and got engaged we came back to our entire apartment reorganized she went through everything and she had taken over the living room and the office by bringing all of her stuff from home to our place we thought that she would crash on our pull-out couch and we could help her get back on her feet instead she dominated our lives seemed disinterested as to ever leaving and we couldn't enjoy our recent engagement she then started to spout conspiracy theories convinced her to leave after a few weeks and threw away the rest of her stuff after a few months when she wouldn't pick it up moved away soon after and threatened everyone to not tell her where and didn't even bother to kiss her goodbye you be it seems the Nazis could have invaded England successfully if they'd abandoned their weapons and just slowly taken advantage of English manners and hospitality until they ruled the country you joke but that was our biggest fear had he brought schnaps and sausage we would have been obliged to offer him our country in return I once home to redditor who was not too far off from the past abend stuff I've read about laura-leigh I had a friend who lived out of town call me up and asked if he could crash at our place on the way back to his hometown his drive if he had done it all in one day would have taken him eight hours instead he drove to my 500 sq ft app that I shared with my bf and our two cats he ended up staying for a whole week didn't offer to help clean after my bf and I paid for and cook every meal all he did was sit in the corner and read manga finally I confronted him by asking him so what time are you leaving tomorrow now I avoid talking to him my ex mother-in-law came for a visit before only once could I handle that woman and all her gang nitpicking I'm very lucky my future mother-in-law lives in France my ex-girlfriend not that I hated her or anything but we had a long-distance relationship so we'd see each other for 3-4 days every month I'm the kind of person who likes his alone time but every time during these 3-4 days we'd be doing things together or just being near each other 24 stroked 7 we both had small apartments as well so you couldn't get away for just a little bit I was always pretty glad when she or are left after these days I loved her but I'm not made for that kind of intense socialization with anyone I think that's what I found hardest was that there was no alone time I mean just an hour or so to read a book or sit on the computer even now my son knows to leave me be for a little while so that I can get my head together sorry it didn't work out with your ex people that stay over way too long and won't take the hint to leave when you say things like well it's getting late or I have some stuff I should probably be doing Phil tomorrow I always feel like an but straight up telling someone to get out of my house because I don't want them there anymore but some people just will not take a hint she really doesn't I kept saying that the horse wasn't quite ready for someone else to write her the saddle wouldn't be right for her perhaps she could delay her visit until we were ready but nope up she popped my woman's friend from college has been around the world traveling pretty much since he graduated he says he will be in our city and asks to crash at our place we agree as we had a new largest place and didn't mind at all so he comes we show him around our apt complex and hang by the pool for a bit he tells me how successful his travel bloggers and was pretty much simultaneously bragging and inferring we were suckers for having regular corporate jobs this was agitating but I ignored it he then flat out ask me how much I made I told him believe misunderstood what I said and I just let him roll with it I do quite well he thought I said about one stroke three what I actually said so it's getting late and after spending an hour listening to how he was a successful mini celeb amongst backpacker types we go to bed he wakes up the next morning and then go through my cabinets asking if he could make breakfast I am a little perturbed at his forward neskowin through my cabinets but I am like a if he is going to cook for me that's cool I was heading into the shower and it didn't occur to me until I was in the shower that he never asked me what I wanted this was because he did indeed make himself some bacon eggs and toast but only for himself I am pretty P at this point but I am more occupied W getting to work on time than dealing W this to it that night he proceeds to go out in the city to some parties without inviting us but then proceeded to try and be a douche and tell us about these exclusive clubs he got into and in his drunken stupor rant about how all his old friends are getting married and are so different well done people grow up in the five years after college he also would not refer to my dog who was then just a puppy as anything other than that dog and just left her in her crate all day she of course whined about this and then he bitched to my wife about the dogs whining he never gave us a dime for the food let alone offered to buy us a meal or do anything in return for parking his but on our couch for three days he will never step foot in my home again I once bought home this girl this real vivacious girl yeah you know the type so we have been making out in the taxi and it's all going smoothly we are enjoying ourselves as plenty we get back to mine tray a lot clothes from the door to my bedroom we fall down on my bed wearing only our undergarments then she says hold up she takes off her panties and turns out she has a giant dong wait no that's not what happened she says hold up and sits up in bed and starts to take out her hair not like a wig but she starts to unclip a whole bunch of strands of hair so after about three minutes of her removing hair extensions there is a pile of human hair on my floor and suddenly this girl looks completely different she then takes out her eyelashes yeah her freaking eyelashes okay whatever we get down to business and I unhook her bra and she is wearing those chickens Phil it's under her padded bra she has basically done that transformation that those old witches do in that movie with the witches and the mice I forget what it's called something about witches well now I am NOT a superficial person but I felt like I had been lied to fortunately she did not have a dong and I did have a light switch so I was able to regain my word and flick her unfortunately the entire time I was freaking I had that old lady's face from that which is movie stuck in my mind and when I finally came I felt the most shame I have ever felt before it was like after fab remorse multiplied by at least three needless to say I could not wait to see her and her fake real hair get the Frick out of my house a TL DR I had flicked with the old lady from that movie about the witches I've known a few people I was quite excited to see the back of wait that isn't what you meant crap dat back I would love to be a houseguests in Wales the picture is beautiful please let me stay with you : three only if you promise not to bash my horse and the ribs and tell me how to keep them earlier in my high school years I did band we had a band comment from Island and performed for us after a concert the thing is they needed to spend the night at volunteer houses for the night we volunteered we ended up getting a trumpet player his name was Jordan and he was I want to say about six feet eight inches tall he was nice when we met him but we misjudged he demanded for way too much immediately after he stepped foot in our house he announced I wish to take a shower currently they were both occupied by my family and I told him that but he insisted that they hurry up because he was significantly sweaty before dinner he ate to stroke three of the food leaving one stroke three four four other people heeded and stopped there he came into the living room and asked for the remote and changed the channel to the History Channel without asking if it was ok later at night he asked if there was a bed to sleep in upstairs and ended up taking my bed so I slept on the top bunk where my brother normally is and could not sleep due to snoring needless to say it was a great moment of my life when he left the next morning after finishing the syrup for the pancakes so no one else could use it my brother his wife and their kids they stayed with us for a few months in those few months they slept outside my door I heard them arguing about stupid crap for an hour before my dad yelled at them her daughter insulted my biological mother and older brother tried to steal my camera's memory card stole money from my sister and I ended up fighting her because she was trying to treat me like crap in my own home kept pulling the I'm the guest card I wasn't having it they soon got their own apartment and I was so happy they were gone I has a depressed alcoholic stay forget this a year tried to help him in the end after his last of at least fifty outbursts he trashed my house beat up his car yelled at my neighbours at 4:00 in the morning and beat my dog I put him through a wall I'm 5 feet 4 inches female in 110 pounds he was 6 feet and at least 170 not in that order before speeding off to his aunt's house where I presume he still owes the girl just left and it's on my mind my wife and I invited her to stay a few days to sightsee took her around town to see various sights beach dolphin swimming in the bay beautiful old houses historic downtown every time I glanced over she had her face buried in her iphone periodically she'd hear just a word of what had just described and asked what I'd say I was just describing something about what we just passed we had another couple down a few weeks ago they couldn't keep their eyes off of Texas Rangers Twitter updates to look at anything around them I believe aliens have invaded our planet and are living in smartphones and they feed on human attention ooh that's one of my pet hates to put the phone down and actually pay attention to those of us that are here I gave a mouse a cookie I found myself homeless in October of 2010 I called many friends some of whom at one point told me that they wouldn't mind renting their spare bedroom to me however when I would call them none returned my calls one even said that they felt bad saying no to me and that is why they never got back to me but it didn't help matters as I was waiting on them to give me some sort of response and enou would have just meant me putting my energy and effort elsewhere I did find a room for rent from the most unlikely of friends she charged me $400 a month all included I felt like I was saved even though I was in the most horrid of situations just to have a roof over my head was enough for me as Canadian winters can be pretty bad on top of paying the $400 I would do all of my dishes and her dishes too that was sitting in the sink sweep and mop the floors every week wash all the bathroom maps and hand towels and sometimes when I wasn't feeling too crappy about my situation I would cook enough dinner so she wouldn't have to when she got home from work all without her asking for anything I'm all that crappy situation now got a great job and have my own place with an awesome girlfriend now fancy reading stories on this particular post make me realize that we should never burn bridges because sometimes crap could really hit the fan and we find ourselves where we really do need help and never to overextend yourself be humble and offer a helping hand when you can't afford to pay for what look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look you my friend would be more than welcome don't get me wrong I would have never have said no to a friend in need but I just hate being taken advantage of so she was actually a roommate not a houseguest but she was rude arrogant and a one-upper one of those people who everything they do is better their friends are better their family is better of course unless you're suffering then they've suffered more than you she actually wasn't bad to live with at first but about two months into this when I was gone for a weekend she told my boyfriend that she was always mad at me for saying hello when she came home she said she was a very private person which apparently included not being greeted when she came home okay she always bought new things of ranch dressing because she was never aware that she had other things of ranch dressing she would also buy milk and never drink more than maybe half of it she basically called me a slob for not wearing makeup she also had these friends she'd met from a site called FetLife that would basically circle a jerk about bondage and how they were so oppressed by society because of their physical orientations while in the same breath talking about how vanilla people were creepy and how they could never ever have fricked a vanilla person it was like a real life our atheism about bondage she actually just moved out on the 14th of this month even though she was technically supposed to be gone by the 9th we gave her a few days since her lease didn't start till the 15th because of how the lease worked out she didn't tell us for nth but she did ask for utilities it took her four days before we even saw her and when we asked about utilities she rolled her eyes basically said hug let me go get it in the bitchiest most annoyed way possible and stomped off to her room she did give it to us though in the end she had one of her best friends come help her move whom she never introduced us to by the way and she left a ton of stuff behind including food hangers her coffeemaker et Cie all of which we had to take care of she also hadn't vacuumed her room the entire year she lived there though I did just say I would do it anyways but she still have zero intention of vacuuming and pretty much hasn't spoken to her since I think we must have done something to pee her off but I have no idea what my mother's friend and her daughter the mother is fine but her daughter has borderline or histrionic Personality Disorder my heart goes out to all redditors who struggle with the P DS and I have another friend with borderline who's been suicidal so I know it's not something to make a light matter off but it's still very exasperating : I had a friend in high school who in all likelihood had a borderline she was dating another friend of mine and that was such a massively dysfunctional and unhealthy relationship for him Khan we really is a neat place to visit though a friend of mine ended up homeless he said it would only be a couple of weeks that turned into months when he finally left I couldn't have been happier I will never ever ever let anyone stay with me again evey er I don't understand how people put up with crap like this and in your own dang house I'd put them in their place or kick them the Frick out even if it was family as some of the comments are how did she come to stay with you guys when the original claim by her was to check on the old guys also why on earth would you take her out in public was the trip to the castle already planned just an idea but the next time she tries to invite herself over to check on them tell how they died or better yet tell her that one died today next week tell her the other one died and then she won't have a reason to come back every time she tries to invite herself over tell her that you guys can't accommodate guests at this time because of and then find a devastating and contagious disease that is known of and tell her that one of you have it and that the house is under quarantine and for in the future I don't let people ride my horses in fact I am something of an butt hole about it they find out I have horses and it becomes oh I want to come ride I always respond with why does everyone always say I want to ride your horse why isn't it ever I want to come shovel crap or I want to pay a grand a month in grain in fact I get so animated about it that rarely do they ever mention it a second time I've even popped off with much ruder and callous comments that wouldn't be appropriate in here but believe me they never even mention it a second time we all have swine flu and will likely die within a month even the horses if you are new to the channel you can subscribe I publish new videos every day until then check another video [Music]

Channel: Updoot Everything

Views: 112,829

Rating: 4.7340102 out of 5

Keywords: guest, house guest, worst guests, worst guest ever, worst house guest, worst house guest stories, #updootst, updoot, reddit, r/askreddit, askreddit, ask reddit, \r, r\, best of reddit, reddit stories, reddit story, top posts, funniest posts, funny, funny posts, funny reddit stories, funny askreddit, reddit funny, askreddit funny, askreddit stories, reddit stories 2019, people of reddit, sub, reddit cringe, memes, toadfilms, updoot everything, updoot reddit, story, stories, rslash, fresh

Id: wtsV0lY5M_8

Length: 46min 58sec (2818 seconds)

Published: Sat May 16 2020