Am I moving too fast? | Talks with Tony

hey hey tony gasses here now i'm gonna be running off some of these questions because been a little tied up for those y'all don't know um i was working with a college basketball team that was in the tournament so i went up to the final four and it kind of took you know three four days away from me and um but i'm back home and so i'll be shooting videos as i'm able to now i'll be going through this talks with tony and y'all uh remember this now asktonygaskins.com is something totally different it's very a small amount of people who just they have a question that day and need to answer within five business days and it's something that is not big enough for a talk with tony episode and it's not big enough for a whole one-on-one coaching session that's what that is for that's not going to take away from this right here talks with tony because this is over i still have over 1900 of these to get through so understand that now if you go to asktonygaskins.com use a gmail because the system is not fully all the way connected so it's blocking you know yahoo and aol and all of that so use a gmail for your email address that you you know fill out uh here we go now this is a short question so y'all got to forgive me if you see a lot of short videos or just you know me multiple videos just kind of as you've seen you could come in each day and check to see what i put and you can add them to your playlist or whatever and i'll catch up when you can but i got to get them out when i can so understand that hi tony i am 31 years old and i met a man he's 33. i have two kids 11 and 18 months 11 and 18 months my youngest child's father left me to help someone else so it is going on a year that i have been single i am in a better place thanks to you and coaching anyway the guy is 33 and he does not have any kids he has his own house and is an engineer so he is better well off than me financially he has made it clear that he wants me and i am not sure what that means when i am with him i feel beautiful and special he is the first man i have actually look him in his eyes when he speaks to me he is very gentle but i am but am i he is very gentle but i am moving too fast question mark i don't know i could put a face with a name a little bit i see your picture there um here's the thing if you wonder if you moving too fast then the answer is yes now you say you met a man who you know he's 33 you 31 but you didn't say when you met him now you've been single for a year you said but this rule of thumb always for this right here always understand that your intuition unless you now if you snort powder and everything now i'm not judging anybody that's between you know what you're going through and what you and you know the lord is working on in your life now if you snort powder or if if you you know dealing with pills and things of these nature even a strand a certain strands of the green leaf your intuition will be off your intuition will be off but if you're not dealing with those things then you can always trust your intuition so if your intuition say pump the brakes slow down a little bit hold on now then that's what you need to do now it's amazing that you know he's an engineer and so here's the thing if a person is faking a man or woman if a person is faking they can only fake for so long so that's why you have to keep your body to yourself the mistake that people make is we come into a situation we fill in the person what we call chemistry and then we get on our back you get on your back and now you've given your body to this person so now you got to add them to your body count now you've created another you know sexual tie this another person that on your list that you got to think about maybe even talk about when you get ready to marry somebody and then boom the six month mark hit and this person is a completely different person and you're like wow and then you do the same thing over and over and over the next thing you know you slept with all of these people but none of it came with a ring and so whenever you meet anybody what you have to do is take your time take your time and give yourself a timeline now of course as a christian i believe you should wait until marriage but i was struggling and did not wait until marriage so i understand the struggle i don't condone it but i was in a backslidden state and not doing the right thing if you know better and you can do better you know i was 21 years old if you older even if you're 21 but you got sense see when i was 21 i didn't have i didn't have youtube there was no youtube where i could go and listen to somebody teach me from their mistakes i didn't have that my parents didn't open up to me in that way and really lay out the game so if you watching this video you have something that i didn't have you have something that a lot of people who you know in 2005 did not have because today is so many people online on youtube and instagram sharing stories giving advice telling teaching from their lesson from their mistakes in life so if you now is no excuse to not know better because even if you don't have a father or a mother you got people online that's sharing with you and giving you some tips and tools for success in life business what have you so now that you know better you should abstain you should abstain and see now too because the world is so much the world is so weak we getting weaker and wiser meaning the technology is growing fast but the the smarter our phones get the dumber we get the smarter our tvs get the dumber we get so what's happening is we moving at the light of the the speed of light but that's changing our morals and our values so everybody today so sexually charged so loose booty that boom jumping in the bed right away and then some people not only jumping in the bed right away but they settling for um polyamory and all this other kind of stuff i mean threesome folsom all kind of stuff going on watching nasty movies with your partner going to the script club with your partner you know getting other people in there you know slipping them a little something you know did the take them with your partner it's all kind of tomfoolery going on right now and so you all you have to keep your wits about yourself and you cannot let your morals and your values change just because the morals and values of society is changing don't worry about society because see society going to uh a t double l in a hand basket with gasoline draws on that's what society doing you can't try to keep up with society okay y'all wanna okay y'all wanna have three go right ahead all right okay and the next thing you know you checking them in at the clinic with your rn degree your lpn degree cna degree you at the clinic oh oh how you doing okay um would you like to get done today hiv test okay okay no problem thank you you know it's great to be tested and so now you kept your morals your value your standard you're not sleeping with nobody but everybody that was judging you and calling you lame calling you approved calling you all this right here oh you listening them online relationship coaching and you can't leave your life now here they coming to the clinic and now you are you looking at them and and all you can do is pray for them lord bless them lord give give him or her the strength to get through this trying time help them to turn their pain into purpose lord because they that's the life that they was in i hope they can make some of it and it could make them and not break them and that's all you could do a pray for them and so you have to keep your wits about you so this man right here now listen don't let cuz he an engineer don't do not strains for a piece of change don't do nut strains for a piece of chain don't feel less than because you have two children and don't feel less than and come in there and feel like oh you got to be sliding down the pole and you got to be sucking and ducking because he got monty and you got two children don't let that make you feel less than because he coming in there he say he want to then let him show and prove that he wants you let him court you let him work for you and that's how you run this hill and now that right there you set a timeline in your mind but some people it's gonna be we not sleeping together until marriage for other people it's gonna be until engagement for other people it's gonna be until a year for other people it's gonna be six months for some people it's gonna be three months some people it's gonna be two one and then some folk just down with the get down just first night yeah he goes they just all everywhere and you like my goodness do you know the person last name and i i used to be one of them people so i ain't judging you now but you gotta do better because i'ma tell you right now let me tell you right now let me tell you right now uh the std they being passed out like club flyers you you remember how the guys be in the street handed out the flyers for the club for the party in college and in downtown where the club's at maybe all them guys out there promoting with them flyers if you at the game and you come out to your car and in the rain and now this flyer stuck on your window and you can't get it off your window because they don't stuck flyers up under the windshield wiper while you in in the facility having you a good time that's how they handed out these here ftd and i'm gonna tell you now [Music] everybody ain't built for it now we have coaches on my mentor.life who that their path has gone down there and they didn't been with somebody and contracted a std and they found a way to god be the glory to turn it into purpose if you not built like that that thing could that thing could break you down that thing could tear you down so you have to every time when you get ready to open your legs if you're a man you get rid of hopefully he open your leg when you get ready to unzip your pants you putting your life on the line and see we don't think about it like that we think oh i'm wrong this chemistry all right you ever seen an explosion in chemistry class ah okay all right you better google it google it yeah chemistry go wrong too chemistry will blow up right in your face and so that's what you have to understand like don't be out here trying to listen to these people oh don't listen to that religion that's your religion talk about it you can't sleep he he wait till marriage and it worked out for him listen everybody grace and favor ain't your grace in favor okay i don't went through something that cost me that didn't cost nobody else that went through it you see what i'm saying so you can't look at the dumb choices that i made or that somebody you know made and say oh i'm going to make the same dumb choice because they made it through no that's not wisdom that's ignorance and you're going and when you willingly ignorant it's a price to pay it's different when you ignorant because you don't know no better but when you willfully and willingly ignorant guess what the toll you finna pay on that road i finna be healthy you hear me listen to what i'm telling you now listen what i'm telling you now yeah play with if you want to play with it you want to all right i'm trying to tell you because i'm right here i'm out here and i'm reading so many messages caught the std count the std and i've been doing what i'm doing for 14 years in the last two years i've seen more people with std in my inbox they're not a scene in a lifetime so i'm here to tell you when you get in your relationship your intuition your intuition say partner break partner breaks because guess what if you're less close to them because see some men will try you some women will try you what i mean by this is if they come in your life and you have something that's perceived as baggage you have something that's perceived as a negative on the dating market they will try to use that against you and say oh well how you gonna make me wait when you already got two children that ain't fair to me you didn't why you make them their father's weight so you want to just bust it wide open you spread eagle for they daddy and then now he'll come a man that's an engineer and that's a good man and now and now you want to be a born again virgin see this the problem with y'all women now and i would just listen to my homework sitting in that dark with them things spinning on the desk and then what he was saying about y'all because you don't even understand but no high value man i'm an engineer and then here you will bulk busted and disgusted got two kids and they use on my two way see that's your problem now and that's how they'll try to make you feel guess what okay all right i got my headphones got another person okay okay that's how you feel okay all right that's how you feel okay well all right well well since she's so high value that means you got enough money to buy you something on the street corner all right see you later get my candle and go you see what i'm saying got to go got to go all right high value all right just keep all your value then keep all your value because guess what you got to be able to be willing to let him know my value ain't ain't between my leg my value up here in here so if that's what that's what me that mean you play boy go right ahead go right ahead god bless you all right go ahead find your little thing that's gonna get on a bike for you when you read him and just you say jump she gonna say hi hi bye you see i'm saying that's how you got to be because with women falling into these traps or what the world trying to make everybody just get on their back what is it doing ftd flying give me ftd sexually transmitted disease spiritually transmitted diseases you hit him std flying then children out of wedlock so now it's a bunch of shaking up you know and and what's happening the home the structure of the home breaking down because it's a lot of people that don't like each other but them fell into the bed because society said this is what grown folks do so that you know fell into the bed you ain't got no real connection ain't got no real bond ain't got no lifelong commitment you fall into the bed you're gonna get comfortable and what's gonna come with it a std or a child one or the other and sometimes both but sometimes both and depending on what you contract depending on what you contract now you're gonna determine if your child coming out with it [Music] and yeah you know because of this right here you have to be very serious it's it's babies and came into the world blind because of what a mother contracted so this real this is real you can't play with this now you can't play with this [Music] you cannot play with this and this your body this your life you hear me take your time take your time take your time somebody and guess what if he wants you all right play black get on one knee get on one knee if if if he know you the one get on the knee get over the knee all right will you marry me if he ready to turn that jagged edge on let's get man all that right and he got that jagged edge on going about your business going about your business and you know what i had three more orders to fulfill from my last t-shirt um drop which were two months ago and i just want to commend those individuals for waiting and being patient you know wrote in and i wrote them and i said hey you know ran out of them shirts do you want your money back or do you want to wait until the next drop and they said i'll wait till the next all three of them so i just want to thank y'all y'all know who he is god bless you you know because it is some ungrateful people boy yeah some ungrateful people out here you hear me tony ain't doing a video every day last i checked i had a family last i checked i had a life last i checked i'm trying to run companies and i look at the comment they ain't even members of the black tribe ain't even supporting me so hey i just want i got to give credit what credit do cause we always talk about the naysayers and haters and all that but got to give credit to credit what credit is due so god bless y'all you know who waited for them church to come in and um so they going out in the mail god bless you thank you but back to what i was saying i got to get going now now i'm sometimes only right here the short level the video i'll be short it ain't gonna be no hour but i upload another one you know at another time so just put it on your your calendar where you can just come in and check sometimes be no videos sometimes be three videos in a day you just never know but this the message because this actually coincides with a question that i received not long ago on the social media that said tony you know can you talk about how society is pressuring us to get on our back but what about can you encourage the people that don't want to be on their back and want to save themselves and that's what this video here serves as in addition to this here is don't let this movement a quote-unquote high-value men pressure you into selling yourself short and feeling like you got to bend over backwards to get a man if a man can't see your value if he can't see your heart if he can't see what you bring to the table as a human being the fact that you can be his wife and the fact that you can bear his children the fact that you just you being a woman alone you bring assets to the table because of your brain because of your mindset because of your personality traits because of the unique innate gifts that god has only bestowed upon a woman if a man can't see that he don't deserve you and vice versa if a woman can't see that and you as a man for the men watching this she don't deserve you you can't let somebody pay check that they get or degree that they have make them put them on a pedestal where they looking down on you and they rushing you into a relationship or anything and this ain't saying that this was happening in her relationship now and this also disproves some of the stuff that's being said because some people don't believe that a man who is an engineer who make money want to be with a woman who have who is 31 with two children and with two children from two different relationships so the relationship far apart now 11 years old and 18 months it's like 11 and 18 months but i don't know it can't possibly be 11 months and 18 months so i have to be 11 year old and 18 month old so you know right so if you let people out here today tell it a man who got that kind of engineer money don't want that but this man here telling this young lady listen i want you and now for whatever reason for whatever reason might just be you know your aura he might like the way you look might like the way just your demeanor feel your personality it could be it could be all of the above he may be ready for him some children and don't want to wait on him and he just happy you already got two out here in the world existing and he ready to be a bonus dad you just don't know the person a lot in life but here's what you got to know you got to know you and you got to know your standards you got to know what you stand for so he wants you on your back inside of three months and that ain't what you with all right he got the kid ross with open toe sandals on he want you six months on your bike 12 months before marriage whatever he want that you ain't with you got to be willing to let him go you can't be like oh he a high value man no he ain't because if he can't respect your wishes he can't respect you as a person your standards your value he ain't high valued in he ain't high value he's selfish he nasty and he greedy that ain't high value we get that confused we think high value mean money money ain't got nothing to do with a value a person's value a person could make twenty thousand dollars a year and have more value than somebody that make two million a year that's what a lot of people don't understand so hey now really you know let this get this in your spirit now and just sit with it sit with it and uh let it speak to you and listen this one thing i'ma say listen to your intuition men and women one was intuition very strong a man intuition very strong too now unless you know you crazy if you know you crazy then i see me i'm allah i be over analyzing so for me i understand i can't listen all the way to my intuition because i be telling my stuff myself stuff that ain't never happened ain't never been said you know so i have to you know reign that in because you know sometimes you have analytical personality or you know you just kind of struggling just with oh this right here that right there you know sometimes just we think too much but my wife she didn't she don't overthink stuff and so she didn't talk me about that and so that helped me a lot man and once you know then you have the ability to grow once you know that's why they say knowledge is power once you know then you have the ability to grow so you got to know yourself and then that's how you got to move hey this is tony gaston god bless you we'll be in touch

Channel: Tony Gaskins

Views: 17,124

Rating: 4.968421 out of 5

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Id: y0KToXthMRA

Length: 25min 58sec (1558 seconds)

Published: Thu Apr 08 2021