He didn’t respond for 5 days | Talks with Tony

hey tony gaskins here popping in another episode of talks with tony now we're gonna jump right on in this might be this third video of the day so i told you now when i miss when i get to sit down i try to go on do what i could do but when i can't do i can't do now we're gonna jump right on in here now good afternoon i watched several of your videos and i'm still a little confused about my situation slash relationship i've been in a relationship for a little over a year a little over a year he moved in with me when the and and started because of the stay at home order i am considered high risk anyway so throughout this we lost three people the third was two weeks ago prior to the last death we were having some issues and he asked for processing time two days later we talked and he apologizes and says he's not going to leave and that we can resolve our issues and move forward the following day starts out normal but around 10 30 a.m he comes in from work crying and overly emotional gives me a huge hug and kiss and says his aunt died and he's leaving for michigan he leaves i call about four hours to check on him and how the drive is going it went straight to voicemail so i say okay perhaps he's handling business etc i call a few hours later computer trying to update i call a few hours later same thing so i say maybe his phone died i proceed about my evening and call before bed and again straight to voicemail i say okay so he's blocked me and left me i go about my day the next few days and no call no messages no nothing i inform him that communication is vital and that this is a deal breaker for me so i decided to send him a message and pack his stuff up and put it outside out put it outside slash in the garage after about five days he finally responds and says okay i'll deal with virginia when i'm done with michigan and tries to blame me for ending their relationship he returns to virginia on day 10 hands me the house key a card a michigan gift and says this isn't what i wanted to come back to my response was i don't understand why you expected anything different you left me you did this you were told that leaving and staying out all night without communication was a deal breaker so here we are now it's been about two weeks and he's gotten most of his things and is telling me that he wants to fight for the relationship and has asked me to fight for it also i am in my early 40s and he's in his late 30s does age slash maturity matter in this situation or is this a grown boy test i'm on the fence of whether or not i want to fight i'm trying to figure out if i miss him or do i just miss our routine and the presence of him prior to him abruptly leaving he was in tune with the relationship meaning scheduling time checking on me etc respectfully so confused now i'll tell you now this one here got me confused too it's gonna take about five minutes wrap my head around this one now he'll go to monday morning quarterback oh all right no else i'm telling you what it is right now listen calm down calm down calm down mom brady yeah tom brady calm down mom brady the monday morning what you did in your relationship uh um all right all right what did you all right but everybody got a comment boy but getting get in the kitchen go to sweating bullets you'll be hot in the kitchen now listen right here now first off i like the fact that you got deal breakers that's a good thing you got to have these deal breakers okay second all he know about your deal breakers and he tried you like a basil anyways so when a man know about your deal breaker and he try you that is a grown boy test now i'm gonna tell you i don't lost two aunts my dad only got two sisters then lost both of my aunts on my mama's side i'm i don't know if i've lost an aunt maybe one um uncles then lost a few uncles then lost about five cousins then lost best friend died right in front of me then lost the first cousin got shot in the head two times so i don't lost people i'm here to tell you i'm having a hard time believing that he couldn't send you a text message i'm having a hard time believing his phone was dead for five days i'm having a hard time believing that he couldn't say hey that he couldn't call you when he stopped to get gas i'm having a hard time believing that he couldn't call you hey so sorry my phone was dead i ain't have no charger but boom got to the circade boom bought me a charger gassing up right now you know what i'm saying just want to give you a little quick call i'm just even if he distraught and everything everything going good you know you know what i'ma let you go even if he distraught give you a little call look courtesy this right here everything in me feel like this got to do with another woman but i hope that it does not have to do with another woman because if this man came in that house boohoo crying to then go on a little minute vacation with another woman to michigan or if he used his auntie dying now if you got a obituary you ain't saying nothing about the obituary do you have obituary because if you have the obituary now then you know the auntie pass if this man parlayed his auntie passing into some quality time with another woman that he been playing on at work and they've been building and you know they was building and then he then cried to her and cried to you but got her to be his teddy bear on the way over there and then cut his phone off so you wouldn't be calling so it wouldn't be popping up while she in the car with him while they ride in the michigan shoe it's like you know on situation like this you know don't nobody know but but the eyes in the sky and on system wasn't like this you that's when we wish we could just talk to god say lord okay i know you see everything now was it a woman in the car with him on the road on the highway to michigan didn't man go to michigan lord did it man go to michigan what this man in michigan or what this man in virginia beach with another woman what was this man at the new jersey beach with another woman lord what's going on and i know it's moments like this that you want to know now i'm leaning toward y'all back together because this from november 3rd i'm leaning toward y'all back together if y'all back together so stop i hope he amazing i hope he's doing amazing i hope y'all even changed his life and did a 180 you hit me and living right do you hit me because if you dealing with any kind of issues any kind of drama right now and you back with him he don't play you he didn't got you he didn't got you like listen right here if if somebody disappear for five days and when he respond he respond with a text message and the text message is blaming you i gots to go i got to go so so start if you went back down you got you just got to just get your old marker just get your old marker for the next week and see this is what y'all got to start doing nah not literally but yeah sometimes literally though what you all got to start doing is get your old marker ain't got no marker and write you a big l on your forehead i gotta forgive my elbow might be a little ashy got a shower i don't know if i lotion get you a marker and put your big l on your forehead and just go to work like that why you got the air on your forehead took a loss and just how i teach myself that if i stay in this situation this how dumb i look so just get your laughs in you know what that is genius i'm gonna start doing that because i mean is no good relationship if i look like you look right now oh girl i be going tonight did you have to make it that big what kind of marker you you that's what you got to do you have to go through that put that l on your forehead now can you imagine writing the l on your forehead and going to work every day can you imagine that your boss writing you up your boss right here same thing gonna happen when you're in a relationship taking the l you're getting rolled up cause you can't focus on the job cause you're in this sorry relationship your boss gonna write you up you come in the third day now you're finna get suspended without pay same thing will happen on your job when you're in a relationship taking a l because you can't focus you're coming into work late you calling out of work cause you up fighting until three four o'clock in the morning you ain't got the energy go to work you got a scratch on your face you you uh he didn't pull the glue the gluten can't lose the track to move you can't go to work like that you have dresser booked up she can't get you in until sunday so you got to miss friday work you can't go to work friday because he got everything crooked and you don't want to go in there with your natural hair to help because you ain't been taking doing your treatment take your natural hair so you have you got to keep the lace front on now what the ball is going to do you then come in the work every day late night you calling out unexcused absence he know ain't nothing wrong with you he could tell in your voice that ain't nothing wrong but that that lace front crooked because you and your boyfriend were tussling and see this the thing now when you put that l on your forehead and you walk you go to work with that that's how it's gonna make you feel that's how you got to feel see a lot of times we take ills in private and we don't realize that our friends and our family could see that we plan the food that we as being a fool in love and that we look a absolute mess so when this right here uh um new sir new sir um you've been relationship with him over a year and after yeah at the 12-month mark that's really when you supposed to make your decision nah see this thing he moved in i don't trust no man moving in i don't trust a man moving in with a woman he need to have somewhere to stay he need to have somewhere to stay he moving in and you high risk he come in the house and coughing your face after he been on this road trip to michigan i'm praying the lord you're still here if you hear let right man let me know you still here lord lord be with them the lord be with a nine this right here nine this right here just got real serious because this is the high risk and he all in michigan with another woman that man come back home and bring that 19. see this thing right here that's why you can't play with people cuz you playing with your life this man all he all breathing in that woman fade kissing all in her face got the phone turned off phone going straight to voicemail and this and he come on excuse me this not what i want to come home to excuse me next thing you know [Music] you asthmatic next thing you know you having complications because you can't play with this you can't play especially right now because you're playing with your life in more than one way the other video we did today we talked about std this right here you at risk for std and the 19 fooling with him because he nah i'm gonna tell you one thing about this situation that i wish that i was a fly on the wall to see this man coming in the house boohoo crying now he could have cried in the car that's why there's another reason why i don't this ain't really sitting well with me because he could have cried in the car he could have cried in the car he could have cried the whole way home from work but he finna come in the house boohoo crying and then he want to cry and then he won't leave and don't want to take you if he that distraught well he got to walk in the house boohoo crying and then hug you all tight you need more support hey can you call off work emergency tell them you know just whatever like because i need some support that's what i'm gonna ask that's what i'm gonna ask i got tickets to the um game tonight my son's got practice but i want my wife to go with me so i just asked my wife i'm gonna see what she said after i get off this hill and check my test man i asked my why can't you go to the game with me tonight and let your momma take take the boys to practice because i want my wife dealt with i won't i want my woman with me so this why this how he gonna feel this how a man gonna feel if he distraught when i go to a funeral my wife go with me i ain't gonna know funeral about myself i need my support system so this right here this ain't adding up now i know that that your excuse went well he know i can't take off work he know if y'all in like you saying y'all in the p [Music] that 19. these jobs understand you could call off just like he had to call off [Music] and so this is the thing right here and then the man that's the thing is he'll play boy he didn't even put the phone he didn't even put the phone on he need to put the phone on do not disturb the well it just it rang for you but don't show up on his phone he need put on do not disturb he block you because if he turn the phone off because he got other people got to be calling them family members you know if it aren't actually passed then his you know his mama called him or daddy mama whoever sister that was they calling him his cousins his aunt you know sons or daughters that's her first cousin they calling them on the way hey how you doing you on the way everything going good family gonna check on you if they know you making that road trip so like you say he blocked you and then he left your blog five days they're gonna unblock they're gonna send you a test and then blame it on you [Music] why this health system now first when you first when i first was reading this i said nah oh no this is hell you kind of overreacting so let's come on now you [Music] oh sis the man they answer the phone and you put his stuff in the garage i'm like wow well you move fast ain't you boy you don't play no game you say you've been watched several of my videos this why didn't man be mad with me now you how you throwing my name in the conversation and the man missed a phone call and hit all this stuff moved to the garage and he i hate honey gavin get on my nerve make me sick y'all remember we used to say that growing up make me sick i don't even know what that come from cause you actually was not sick make me sick that's what he said and so this right here [Music] y'all see at first sis i thought you were overreacting but then after i really think about this thing and i let this thing really sit with me if my other half imma call the other half you know y'all ain't mad but y'all living together so yeah you know y'all playing house so that feels like your other half if my other half get on the road to go to another state and i'm calling calling calling and ain't gonna answer and then not even like when they get there don't even get no answer at nighttime hey i made it and then the second day the third day the fourth day the fifth day oh yeah i'm living i'm living and everybody watch this video you take the time to just process that feeling like you'd be upset off somebody ignoring two or three calls but for five whole days oh yeah oh yeah you did the right thing but see this way you lost it that night this way you lost it at if you let him come back you lost some respect you lost some respect and if you ain't being just as strict in your other deal breakers since you if you don't let him come back oh he don't respect you not now he got you now he's gonna call your bluff use a bluffer use a bluffer and now he he don't respect you at all so understand what i'm telling you now understand what i'm telling you so feel him on this right now fit me on this so you so here's the thing if you left him and went on about your business you was not wrong to do that because see that's what you got to do that's what you got to understand when somebody tried you like a basil you have to leave anybody knew basil is a drug addict basically mean freebase that's a type of drug drug usage okay and they be they get addicted to it and when they get in that state you know people be trying them hey watch these three cars for a dollar a dollar you can't do it what you can't do 150 a dollar fifty oh man you know what i take though and people be trying them like that so when i so anybody that's new to the video when you hear me say try like a basil that's extreme disrespect because that is not right how people be doing these people that is under this addiction and this is what happened in relationship we be addicted to love but it's our what we call love we be addicted to companionship we be addicted to the feeling the release we get just like you said i don't know if i'm missing him or if i'm missing just his presence so you have to understand you got to understand dopamine that's released from your brain that's serotonin that oxytocin the feel good chemical that release from your brain it gives your body a high it gives you a natural high when it get into their bloodstream so your brain go to craving that so his smile his laugh his caress it does that for you so when he even when he tried you like a basil and you get a little distance you start to miss the release that the good parts of him would give you and then you'll overlook the band and then you'll go back and that be our problem that be our problem right now [Music] and so that's what you have to think about in this hill situation because remember if you give him a hundred points boo for for being being a good man living with you when he do something like this right here he lose a hundred points a day so now he could be up a hundred and after five day negative 400. you see what i'm saying and so now what he got now what can he do to get okay apologize okay plus 100 still negative 300. okay come back bring a card bring a card and a michigan gift so then came back then dropped her off then dropped her bike off at her place they didn't went they went to virginia beach wasn't nowhere near michigan you can say none but no obituary if you brought your obituary back then came back and then dropped off went to cvs walgreens rite aid ralph's kroger's whatever y'all got up there uh joe's and then got your love if you look gifts and come on home huh so so this all so this all you think it take you disappear for 10 days and then come back with a card and they're going to give back the house key like you really want to get back the house key and then get a little raggedy card and a little michigan gift and then go holla bye this isn't what i want to come back to this what you left this is how you left it this what you did for disappearing and going ghost for ten days this is what you wanna if you wanna come back to it you should have been in contact should have been communicating should have been on the phone falling asleep with your woman at the end of the night i miss you i love you and i just thank you for being there for me this such a tough time you know my auntie was like my mama and it just i just love it with everything and it just took all everything out of me just like it's like a piece of me it's gone and i just think that's how you should have been if you feeling that grief you have to let your support system your woman that's ten toed down in them trenches with you got you living in her abode got you in mikasa sukhosa grown musty butt casa su casa eating up all the grocery for over a year this in there and the woman high risk you going out here all inhaling all kind of bacteria all kind of 19 in your lungs and then gonna come back breathing in this woman's face and she high risk you all crossed state lines um stuff all high they daily count all high and you all locked up and then ain't got the decency to answer the phone and say yeah my help but i got my mask on and i'm making sure i'm keeping six feet distance you know i'm out here in there and with this here they got us you know they we doing awake and with the room we can't really do that because of the stipulation so we spread out six feet apart at the burial site and i'm keeping my mask on now because someone feminism got diabetes anyways and i know you high risk so i want to come back to you that's at least what you could have did just been on the phone in communication in contact but you're out there with another one come on you're out there with another woman now cause not now a death could hurt not a death can hurt but even if it's your mama or your daddies this is what you gotta ask yourself do what you gotta ask yourself as a human for anybody watching this to fully understand this [Music] even if your parent pass away if you live with your partner for over and you've been with them for over a year and you get on the road and you finna drive to another state [Music] you gonna at least send a text message at the red lights if everything is gone from you if you feel like you don't die at the least you're gonna send a text message to say hey i made it safely at the least you might talk five minutes hey i made it safe just want to let you know in the midst of your pain miss your tears and crying and if you're the type of person well let's say benefit of doubt he that type person there's something like this happening he just a recluse he just goes into a hole he just go into a hole he then did it before when he said he needs some time to process and then two days later two days later we talked he apologized say he's not going to leave and that we can resolve our issues and move forward let's say benefit of doubt he won them people he take stuff real hard last time it was two days and the person it don't even sound like the person that passed away was all that close because you didn't mention that person name like who that was on this next person you said it's his aunt so that let me know the fact that you ain't missing the first time that it was somebody y'all knew but it wasn't somebody super super super close and if they were super close nine then why why he only took two days and then came back and this one right here he take a whole 10 days you take a whole 10 and this and this your auntie if you unt the pass you ain't got to go right there and be there for 10 days you go there when it's time for the funeral and you might go a day or two early but it takes you know five seven days to get stuff in in order to get the funeral home set up everything set up you know try to get your tombstone and all of that it take a little time so so this right here and not right here something and let me tell you something let me tell you something this man ole is methuselah because you don't mind does age slash maturity matter in this situation he is you say his late 30s what's that 37 38 39 i'm 37 i'm 37 so that let you know right now well 37 yo you know i ain't that i ain't i don't feel like i'm that immature he sounded he my age he my age or might be a year too old and that that's this this full grown we full grown in our late 30s we full grown ain't no excuses for my maturity uh not calling nobody for 10 days you have seen them no scrape the voicemail five straight days no now i could see 18 years old even an 18 year old wouldn't do this a 15 year old wouldn't do this so this ain't age and mature just by blatant disrespect this about [Music] that's what this right here is right in your face get all uh he get eric he get everything no i'm not really coughing up nothing y'all y'all i'm just making noises with my mouth what let's just talk he do it his wife be kissing him i'm not coughing up nothing okay and then whatever he did all that right in your face that's what this right here is that's what this right here because i'm gonna tell that right here i i just lost my uncle he lost his auntie i just i lost my uncle my uncle was deaf for me used to buy me food used to take me to practice i used to stay at his house wake up they give me breakfast take me to school is my dad brother he just passed away [Music] you're not gonna not talk to your other half your partner that you dating that you in a relationship with that you be living with for no 10 days for them 10 days nah the only way i could come close to this right here is his if his auntie raised him but i feel like you wouldn't have left that out if that was the case you because in your mind you would have been trying to give him excuses as to why is he this distant why is he this silent and you would have said his aunt this is the aunt that raised him since he was a baby or since he was three or since he was five she took him in when his mom abandoned him and so he loves her with all his heart you would have said something like that right there because i already know how we think we try to give a person the benefit of the doubt but the most you could come up with is this his auntie now now what i was gonna say is if this man okay nah what you first need to find out did the auntie pass away what's her name google her see if it's coming in the newspaper did he come home with the pamphlet something um that's what okay and so let's say it's true if it's true [Music] what else did he have going on for these 10 days because i'm gonna tell you something if you find out this man was with another woman and that man came home boohoo crying and hugging you if he even made himself cry from one of the passings of a friend or family member to make you drop your guard enough that he could get out the house and go cheat for 10 days [Music] so stuff if that's how you feel if that's what you find out if that's what the evidence concludes you got to run you got to run do you hit me because this kind of man here you gotta sleep like that you got the switch eyes on that's how you got to sleep if this man came home and put on that denzel washington oscar-worthy performance to go got to go and listen when you ask this man when you see the video when you ask this man why did you not call me for 10 days why was my phone going straight to voicemail my phone call going straight to voicemail for the first five days i'm gonna reply to you let you know your letter b going up [Music] um [Music] yeah that will type i know you thought rain drops or something you know didn't know we had no rain that was tight and so listen [Music] if this man here when you ask him that question and you already asked him questions because this this letter from november [Music] let me tell you what you got to ask them again if y'all together if y'all ain't together you know about your business all right keep it like that stay on about your bid and go home about to bend he tries like a basil ask you to watch a semi truck for a dollar that's how he tried you you hit me he tried you but i'm gonna tell you like this right here if the answer to this question on why you ain't called me for five ten days which i wanted was it need to sound like a doctorate dissertation anybody don't hear what they doctor how long was that dissertation how long was your thesis for your doctor how many pages that dissertation i only know what that is but how long was it that's how long this answer need to be that's how long this answer needs to be for a second chance this this answer got to be so well stated and articulate you hear me it need to be so articulate i'm trying articulate it need to be so well thought out and expressive to where if this was the court of love he proved beyond a reasonable doubt that he innocent i mean you got to be convinced that all 12 journals finna say not guilty in the court of love you got to be convinced and i'm just not sure he could sway 12 girls or 15 girls or seven girls or how many other girls it be in the court of love oh yeah often that's when yeah i'm finna start that oh that's going to be one more well i'm going to create meal court of law yeah y'all come to my little courthouse with a little gavel like these judges be doing on tv if you're a tv producer give me a call about the court of law nah now watch when they finna go get the one we judge now go ahead go ahead do what you do we know where it comes from so i'll be putting the video up it will check copyright infringement let me copyright it right now all right so listen to him susan if you left good if you went back everything need to be perfect right now he need to be pristine amazing you hit me with the way he treating you hey tony guys and god bless you we'll talk soon

Channel: Tony Gaskins

Views: 31,353

Rating: 4.9660478 out of 5

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Id: RVTUoYnHkUU

Length: 36min 32sec (2192 seconds)

Published: Thu Apr 08 2021