>>> REMIND THE JURY AGAIN OF THE
MAKE AND MODEL OF YOUR CAR. >> YEAH, I DRIVE A '93 TO TOYOTA
COROLLA. >> WHICH WITNESSES SAY WAS NEVER
AT THE SCENE OF THE CRIME. THANK YOU.
NO FURTHER QUESTIONS, YOUR HONOR.
>> VERY WELL. >> YOUR HONOR, THE PROSECUTION
WOULD LIKE TO CROSS-EXAMINE THE WITNESS.
>> WELL THE FLOOR IS YOURS, COUNSELLOR.
>> MR. REYNOLDS, WOULD YOU PLEASE REMIND ME ONE MORE TIME
OF YOUR WHEREABOUTS ON THE NIGHT IN QUESTION?
>> SURE. LIKE I ALREADY SAID I WAS AT
VINNY'S HAVING TWO SLICES OF ZA. >> AHH!
THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT YOU SAID. I FIND THAT REALLY INTERESTING
BECAUSE I HAPPEN TO HAVE A MENU FROM VINNY'S PIZZA PIZZERIA.
LET'S SEE IF WE CAN FIND OURSELVES A COUPLE OF SLICES
OF ZA. CHEESE PIZZA.
PEPPERONI PIZZA. HAM AND PINE APPLE PIZZA.
AND THAT'S ALL SHE WROTE, YOUR HONOR.
I REST MY CASE. >> COUNSELLORS, APPROACH THE
BENCH. WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?
>> I CAUGHT HIM IN A LIE. HE SAID HE WAS HAVING' ZA BUT
THERE WAS NO LASAGNA ON THE MENU.
>> EXCUSE ME? >> HE SAID HE WAS HAVING ZA, BUT
THE MENU I JUST READ HAD NO LASAGNA ON IT
>> YOU KNOW ZA IS SHORT FOR PIZZA.
>> FALSE IT'S LASAGNA. >> URN, CLEARLY MY COLLEAGUE IS
CONFUSED. >> YOU DON'T MAKE MENUS BASEDAN
-- >> YOU DONE MAKE NICKNAMES BASED
ON SOMEHOW HER SPELLED, YOU MAKE THEM BASEDAN HOW THEY SOUND.
>> EVEN IF THAT'S THE CASE IT DOESN'T APPLY HERE.
>> MAY I ELABORATE. >> YOU MAY.
BUT I HOPE IT'S GOING SOMEWHERE COUNSELLOR FOR YOUR SAKE.
>> LASAGNA, ZANIA, ZANIA, ZA, PIZZA, PEETSA, ZAN YA ZA, PIZZA,
ZA. PIZZA, PEETSA, ZAN YA ZA, PIZZA,
ZA. PIZZA, PEETSA, ZAN YA ZA, PIZZA,
ZA. MR. WILLIAMS, WHAT WERE YOU
EATING? >> I OBJECT.
>> OVERRULED. MR. WILLIAMS, PLEASE ANSWER THE
QUESTION. >> ZA.
>> SO WHEN THE YOUNG MAN SAYS HE WAS HAVING ZA, HE IS SPEAKING OF
LASAGNA. >> THIS IS PREPOSTEROUS.
>> IT'S NOT PREPOSTEROUS. LOOK.
IT'S PIZZA, ZA, LASAGNA, ZA, LASAGNA PIZZA, ZA, LASAGNA,
ZA, ZA, ZA. IT'S NOT PIZZA, BECAUSE THAT
WOULD BE ZA, PIZZA. >> YOU ARE PLAYING A DANGEROUS
GAME. >> YOUR HONOR, FOUR GIRLS ARE
DEAD. AND I PINNED THE KILLER.
THIS YOUNG MAN, MR. ZA. LASAGNA ZA, ZA, ZA.
>> URN, IT IS PIZZA, ZA, AND LASAGNA ZANIA ZA.
THAT'S NOT NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS CASE.
>> I HAVE ONE LARGE ZA HERE. >> THAT'S ME, DUDE, I ADMIT IT I
ORDERED THE ZA. >> I KNEW IT.
LASAGNA ZANIA ZA. YOUR HONOR, I REREST MY CASE.
>> IN LIGHT OF THESE DEVELOPMENTS I FIND THE
DEFENDANT GUILTY. >> THEN I GUESS I DON'T NEED
THIS PICTURE OF YOU AT THE SCENE OF THE CRIME.
>> WAIT. YOU HAD THAT THE WHOLE TIME?
>> YEAH, I NEEDED SOME REAL EVIDENCE.
YOU CAN'T REALLY BANK ON THAT ZA THING.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] ♪♪♪
Well, I'm convinced. Za is now lasagna.
Anyone know if this sketch was written by Larry David?
This is hardly the point of the skit, but how do witnesses testify that the defendant's car was not at the scene of the crime? Are they omniscient?
Mirror? The youtube link isn't working for me.