When All You Think Is: “This B**** Serious?”

what was your is this be serious moment i didn't leave him in the car that long plus the windows were cracked my mother-in-law the last time she was ever allowed to watch my oldest child he was two and it was 90 degrees fahrenheit i was heavily pregnant and had to sit on my hands the next time i saw her because i wanted to cave in the italian leather handbag she calls a face i was biking on a bike path man and his family taking up both lanes i wait finally proceed to go around in the grass man says you can't do that i think he'll find that yes you can in fact do that i was at an atm getting money as a habit i covered the keypad while typing the pin you could never be sure there weren't any camera around out of nowhere this be at the next atm said to me you think people would peek at your pin i was startled it's a basic courtesy to not interfere with others doing their business at 8am i turned to her and said are you serious she had the look of indignant and contempt as if i accused her of stealing pin and said why are you covering the pin i was taken aback and retorted if you weren't looking how do you know i covered the pin she huffed and puffed and left co-worker gave me the whole we're all in this corona thing together and have to sacrifice together speech then called a departmental meeting excluding me to bully our supervisor into making sure that 100 of lost house and lost income from scheduling changes and cuts fall on my shoulders while all of her and her friends paychecks remained completely intact because he is just a part-timer we're the real team here and not him technically he's not entitled to any hours at all so it's okay to cut them all my income for the month dropped over 50 percent while the real team that i've been a part of for five years didn't lose a dime you can file for unemployment for that happened a few days ago customer hasn't paid their bill in five months and was in bad standing even before coronavirus we actually agreed to waive her late payment fields of three months b then has the audacity to demand that we remove 75 of her bill then demanded to speak to the ceo when we obviously refused i love it when customers think they can just keep going up the chain of command to the ceo but like yes lady let me get elon musk for you because you filled up your tesla with gas told a friend that i didn't really feel comfortable around them anymore because of their recent aggressive behavior naturally they threatened to throw me and my girlfriend in jail this just happened to me a few days ago i was walking my dog who is not child friendly and we were coming up on a woman and her small child i could tell the kid was gonna make a beeline for my dog so i crossed to the other side of the street so there wouldn't be any issues this lady yells what my kid can't pet your dog as if her kid was just entitled to touch any dog she wanted to i said he's not good with kids sorry and she yelled back whatever be i was stunned honestly thought about that interaction the rest of the walk but had i just let her kid come up to my dog that kids probably would have gotten bitten in high school a person i knew thought to be reasonably intelligent who had recently been accepted to ucla and later went on to be an attorney asked if debauchery was a new thing or had it been around a while totally new todd in accounting came up with it my hometown has a town fair every year and they do ride bracelets for the first and last day of the fair it's a three-day fair ride bracelet times go from 10 a.m to 4 p.m and then 4 p.m closing 10 p.m i got onto a ride with around 40 other people at 3 55 p.m as the one last ride before we left for the day the guy running the ride literally waited for the five minutes until 4 p.m and then took everyone with a bracelet off the ride because hey it's technically past four and i didn't start the ride yet this was an 85f degree heat kinda hot in new england with uncovered metal seats i was ten then and i'm still mad that they're that petty i had a customer ask me how many ones i could give him if he gave me a twenty dollar i told him nineteen dollars because i was charging a finder's fee he told me that was a great deal and slapped down at twenty dollar we were at a bank i was his bank teller holy crap don't give your bank ideas they already slap a service fee on everything else i unfortunately get this a lot um you can't be middle eastern you don't look middle eastern i usually say and what does every middle eastern person look like makes them uncomfortable for reference i am pretty pale w freckles blue eyes and otherwise my face def looks like a middle eastern woman you'll heard of the crusades my mom and gma are both full middle eastern and look similar my stepmom tried to say she had knee cancer because her knee was hurting pretty sure it was actually because she was 65 morbidly obese and spent every day in bed playing farmville so basically never use them i'm a litigator and i have as this be serious moment every time i'm up against a self-represented party in court the crap they say and do and the lack of deference they have for the judge it's breathtaking someone from my physics class just said that seconds are smaller than meters we are in high school i do not know what to do with this information one second as a measure of latitude or equatorial longitude is equal to about 90 feet so in effect one second is actually much bigger than a meter my wife and i got in an argument she was acting irrational basically she thinks she is a mind reader and thinks anytime i am not in a good mood it's because i am angry with her so she was angry with me for me having a bad day at work she said i was always angry with her abd she was sick of it and she wanted a divorce and move out i had like a brief out of body moment where i visualized myself married to another women happy and with kids so i said then we should get a divorce not thinking she was serious she is moving out in mid-june now i am really looking forward to it i didn't realize how much i wanted it until she brought it up when my dad screamed at me for roughly an hour and a half about how he doesn't care about me how i mean nothing to him and how i'm not his daughter the next day he asked to borrow money for cigarettes and energy drinks i'm sorry but this man doesn't deserve to be called a dad i met some old family friends at my job i told them that my father had died one says well at least you can have your own life now i took care of him and no one forced me to he was my best friend what a w i'm sorry for your loss a few years ago a guest at the restaurant i run thought that her purse had been stolen she demanded that i lock down the restaurant and search guests and staff i told her that wasn't plausible but i would review all of the security cameras and let her know what i find while we waited for an officer to arrive her husband and i tried to calm her down asking when she last had it did she leave it in the car etc when the officer arrived she was still in hysterics eyeballing everyone who was exiting the restaurant and still demanding our staff be searched the officer at this point asked her to calm down and compose herself her response would you tell a woman who had just been violated to calm down the husband the officer and i all just stared at each other ended up looking at the security footage she never had it with her it was in the trunk of the car i was 12 stroke 13 and went to see swan lake with my grandma i've been doing ballet since i was four so obviously i was really excited it was the russian imperial ballet company so i was sitting in between my grandma and another elderly lady and the two women behind us were talking loudly about a wedding during the first 20 minutes of the show i eventually just turned around and shush them and i have never seen two women turned so red so quickly like why go to a ballet just to talk about weddings back when i was working in retail i kindly told a lady that her receipt expired and there was no way i could return or exchange her items she turned around grabbed a stand of jewelry by the checkout and threw a stand of jewelry at my head and called my manager a fat bee in front of everyone in the store luckily i ducked and wasn't hurt that's also when i said i don't get paid enough for this crap i quit a couple of months after i had a girlfriend get furious at me because she discovered my sister was still facebook friends with a girl i had broken up with years ago i tried to explain that my sister is a grown woman we were all in our 30s and i did not monitor her social media habits but this didn't help at all for some reason this relationship didn't last very long after this first time meeting my now fiance's father guy and i made some awkward but polite small talk and then the conversation turns to pets and he braggingly described a time he beat a dog almost to death needless to say the fiance and i'll be spending holidays with my family my ex was wife at the time woke up one time while we were sleeping she's starting hitting me and i mean hard for no apparent reason i wake up due to the pain of being punched like crazy and think wtf what happened did i accidentally stick it in while she was asleep nope after about an hour of her being payoff she finally told me that she had a dream that i slept with someone else and she felt the need to beat me when she woke up yay that was my is this be serious moment my ex when i got to the end i had to go back and make sure this is how your post started i fell out with my mother a year ago she mailed me all of the receipts from my wedding which happened in the early 2000s my husband and i paid for most of the wedding she upgraded our reception space which in the end cost her about 650 our entire wedding cost under 5k whenever she would talk about it somehow she had paid for a larger percentage of it and the total amount was more i have so many stories like that one i kept the receipts just in case anyone we know thinks this didn't happen she also included a nice note stating that she's praying for me to be a honorable daughter and apologize to her the reason we fell out was even crazier i had a customer accuse my place of work of price gouging toilet paper because the package she picked was 5.99 she promptly turned around and spent four times that amount on cigarettes in case you're wondering we do carry packages of the same size for 2.99 by different brands and 0.99 rolls met this girl in high school b really said during science stars are little pointy things our son is the only actual son needless to say the whole class went off on her sorry but yeah we were learning about space that day lady threw a fit because i asked her to buy the 2.50 slinky slinky herbarity child broke said she was going to press harassment charges that was months ago still no word from the police or an attorney on those charges worked at a dunkin donuts in the summers in high school and college was nearing the end of busy sunday morning shift when a lady asks me if any of the products harmed panda bears or their habitat i said i don't know but probably not she proceeded to get angry asking why i didn't know asked for the manager when he said no the donuts are made outside of hartford and truckton and the coffee beans are from south america she got her coffee and left was so dumbfounded a friend and i recently discovered one of the new phd students our biomedical science program accepted his anti-vaccination how why would you go into biomedical science if you don't believe it what is even going on i once had to tell a guy i was working with on a group project twice that his idea was rejected and mine was approved both times he was like where did anyone else say that i was able to quote messages from multiple different individuals later on he complains about how i supposedly arbitrarily changed something in the project and won't add something else in because i didn't like it it got so bad one of the supervisors had to make an official memo stating that i had acted appropriately or at least had done nothing majorly wrong and this guy continues his spiel he's taking a break from the project i hope it becomes permanent customer may i speak to colleague me i'm afraid he's on lunch until 1 30. if i can take your number i can get him to call you back later customer how dare you say that to me hangs up the time in middle school when i told a guy i liked him and he immediately followed up with i don't date asians i'm not asian but i find it a bit funny now i was at the post office dropping off something for my job at the time the neighborhood was and is to this day pretty diverse my mom was spilling the tea on something over the phone it was the middle of the day there was only one window open and one older woman let it being helped i immediately read the room and lowered my voice when i walked in i was mostly just saying you ha and then what anyway in spanish as my mom mostly speaks spanish after the woman was done as she's leaving turns around and hisses this is america learn to speak english i think i blacked out but remembered telling her why don't you mind your freaking business lady and my native english language new york city accent i could have said it to her in three other languages i also speak fluently too what do you mean when you say that the reason one side of the watermelon is flatter yellower and a little scarred and dirty is because that's how they grow on the ground i was working in the produce department of a grocery store 20-plus years ago and this customer thought watermelons grew on trees i handed a client a webcam and told her to just plug it in her computer would detect it and it'll be an option and zoom she points at the power outlet and says okay i'll plug it in here but how does it communicate with the computer my supervisor threatened to fire me because i took two days off with notice but she forgot i requested two days off in advance and got written approval from her i came back into the office wednesday and i'm locked out of my computer the operations manager thought i ghosted the company and stole the company laptop as that's what my supervisor told him i explained the situation to him and he said everything was good supervisor speaks to me in the afternoon explaining how she was about to fire me i told her i already talked to the operations manager who is above her and he has no problem i also explained how those was her fault for forgetting she was speechless and refused to apologize for her mistake ended up working there for two more months and used the ops manager as a reference for a new job frick that be i had the wife of the owner of a pool hall start talking to me about how they like to keep a certain clientele out of their establishment do you know the kind loud obnoxious those people we just don't want them in here i'm bald i shave my head i'm a white dude apparently she took me for some sort of xenophobic skinhead and was testing the waters i hear ya more than once i have had a complete stranger give me the old xenophobic comment nudge nudge wink wink just because i am a fairly large skinhead i have had to tell them i do not share their views likely being a fairly large skinhead i am bald so options are very limited this has virtually always led to a backtrack from them i was at a four-way intersection and i was turning right on a red because there was no traffic the lanes perpendicular to me was still on green the woman across the intersection from me proceeds to turn left while she is still on red and almost hits me then she yells at me for turning right on red while she was turning left on red when i was in high school one of my friends had the same birthday as me but i was a year older for my 18th birthday i asked him to have his birthday party on another day so that our mutual friends wouldn't have to choose between the two and he suggested we throw one big party i was like cool let's do that and it would have been really fun if his mom hadn't shown up halfway through the party and went on a screaming rant about what a selfish butthole i am and how i had stolen her son's birthday by being born on the same day like she literally demanded i apologize for being born on the same day even my friend was like me are you serious this other time she bought this massive book on astrology that had 365 entries one for every day of the years and read my friend's horoscope out and was like that is so you that described you perfectly i then pointed out that i had the same birthday and it didn't describe me at all and obviously he and i had very different personalities she got soapy at me like she blamed me that her stupid astrology book was stupid and we were all like me are you serious i was at the gym about to start using a smith machine when an older woman is pointing at me and angrily talking to another member i took off my headphones and asked if i could help her she claimed that she was putting on her exercise gloves and was just about to use the machine and it was unfair that i was using it because she wanted it after telling her that she could use it she demanded that i take off the weights that were on it when i got there i reluctantly agreed and as i was taking off the weights she starts complaining that i'm a kid 21yo and that i should go to the gym at another time during the day since she works and can only come to the gym in the evenings truly the most sour interaction i've ever had with a person i worked at a movie theater for a couple years we had a few coin operated arcade games if people wanted to break larger bills into coins so that they could play the games we would happily do that for them we were not however able to do cash back transactions where someone would pay with a credit card and would be given back cash there was an atm available inside the building one day this woman came in with her daughter probably around four or five years old they were having some fun with the games then they came up to my register the mom asked me if she could pay five dollars with her card so that i could give her five dollars in change i told her that unfortunately i was unable to do that and i pointed out the atm behind her this woman flips out on me really you're going to tell my daughter that she can't play those games mind you even if i wanted to give her cash back it wasn't even an option on my register it would have looked like i stole money out of my tail the thing that really peed me off though was when the daughter said to her mum mommy can i play now the woman turned to her and said no sweetie this woman me isn't gonna let you play the games honestly frick off seriously what are you teaching your daughter around 17 years ago i was ringing this lady up when i handed her her change she counted it and freaked out because i sure changed her a penny literally freaked out like i was robbing her of a penny i thought it was a joke at first mayo one day my boss asked me to give him one of our office's usb sticks and to put a folder on it named something important cool super easy and it will get him out of my hair quickly a couple days go by and he asks me to email him the empty folder named something important that was saved on the usb stick because he had left the stick at his house i ask why i'm emailing him an empty folder when i can just name a folder on his desktop something important no no no that won't do he needs me to email him this folder not a file a folder for files that do not exist yet all because he didn't want to admit to his second in command that he'd left this usb sticker at home and wanted to show he still had this empty folder named something important with him at all times fairly sure i blue screened this b is always this serious i had a 400 level literature class with the unilaterally acknowledged scariest professor in the university a girl started clipping her nails mid-lecture with little sprockets of nails flying off in every direction landing on people it was like 10 solid minutes worth of clipping can't remember if she ever made it to her toes we the other students started to make eye contact in an are you seeing what i'm seeing way and when the whole class agreed that it was fricked up we burst into shock laughter prof stopped the lecture ignored our explanation gave us a scolding to make the blood run cold and kicked the whole class out i remember walking by a guy looking at tvs with an associate in the department the guy crouched down inspected the box the tv was in looked up at the associate and said the price is three hundred dollars i'll give you 250 dollars for it like you really think at walmart you can freaking haggle prices like that a white lady at work said to me a black guy that she couldn't be xenophobic because she would death sucker black man's dk sounds like she was making an offer to suck your dong if you are new to the channel you can subscribe i publish new videos every day until then check another video [Music] bye for now

Channel: Updoot Everything

Views: 127,775

Rating: 4.9150329 out of 5

Keywords: are you serious, are you serious meme, is she serious, karen, karen reaction, karens, #updootst, updoot, reddit, r/askreddit, askreddit, ask reddit, r/, \r, r\, best of reddit, reddit stories, reddit story, top posts, funniest posts, funny, funny posts, funny reddit stories, funny askreddit, reddit funny, askreddit funny, askreddit stories, people of reddit, sub, reddit cringe, memes, toadfilms, updoot everything, updoot reddit, story, stories, rslash, comedy, fresh, reddit stories 2020

Id: tBx5g_XREvQ

Length: 22min 43sec (1363 seconds)

Published: Wed Sep 23 2020