What's Your Worst NS4W Family Moment?

what's your most nsw family moment when i was 18 i dated a girl she lived about an hour away so i would stay at her house overnight but her parents wouldn't let us stay in the same room so i slept in a guest bed in the basement being 18 year olds we would be up very late and go to bed around 2 a.m her dad was some kind of delivery driver and worked around for he came down to the basement every single morning before work and masturbated to pee on the desktop computer while i was sleeping 10 feet away there was only a couch between us so the first couple times i lifted my head to see what he was doing before i realized you better believe i didn't keep it a secret from her i'd quietly text from under the blanket your dad's jerking it again right next to me just showing dominance in his household when i was a lot younger i'm 29 now my parents had some people over including my one aunt and uncle who are incredibly straight-laced early on in the evening in one of the family rooms she put on a vhs tape to watch of a movie she remembered seeing back during a trip she took with my uncle years ago nothing was really happening with the get-together as of yet since it was still really early in the evening so some of us stuck around to see what movie it was before more people came within the first five minutes there were more topless girls and nudity in it than your average skinner max flick nowadays my aunt is absolutely mortified at this point and says she doesn't remember any of this in the movie while my mom her sister is laughing hysterically grabs the remote from her and says she should keep it on just because what's going on is so ridiculous and my aunt's reaction is just so funny i think my mom's exact words were how the heck could you not remember any of this there's so many t on the screen i can't even see the plot everyone in the room is dying that she brought over what was essentially a soft core 80s skin ploitation movie with a subplot of there being some skiing thrown in there sporadically my dad walks in since he hears everyone laughing and he's just got the biggest wtf face on when he sees what's up makes an about face back towards the kitchen and pours himself a drink i skipped school i used to do it all the time because my dad worked 7 a.m to 5 p.m most days and was a single father i was in my room as per norm and he came home early didn't want to get caught so stayed perfectly still my bedroom's at the top of the stairs the computer is right at the base of the stairs dad watches p for the next hour i think he heard a squeak coz he stopped to holler up the stairs for me but didn't budge didn't move didn't say anything just waited five minutes pass he's satisfied goes back to his business never told him never skipped school again stay in school kids my auntie rang my best mate who was mowing her lawns during that time and asked him to frick her he declined it's good because even though i don't see her often she usually slips me 50 bucks i figure it's her way of saying stfu my wife and i made the very poor decision of playing cards against humanity with my parents i ended up having to explain to my dear mother what b is i had to she would not let it go she ended up winning the game the morning after my wedding i bumped into my cousin in the hotel lobby and she was asking about one of my groomsmen she wanted to know how we were related to him i told her he was just a friend of mine she looked disappointed by this and at the time i had no idea why she cheated on her new husband with him after the wedding reception and she was bummed he wasn't her cousin or some crap because it's not cheating if it's family done found a picture of my dad wearing lingerie not in and i enjoy wearing it at home by myself kind of way better i was forced to buy my mates during a pee up kind of way hilarious with a hint of mental scarring because you my father laddered his stockings when putting them on his fiancee and i stuck nail varnish on the ladder to stop it spreading we hadn't factored in that he hadn't shaved the problem with this didn't occur to anyone until he went to take them off at the end of the night it was known for a long time that my grandpa had a child with his mistress after he died we found out he had yet another kid several years later the min [ __ ] part is that this second child is only two years older than me meaning i have an aunt that i would have gone to high school with or an aunt who could have freaked picked up a buddy of mine from his family reunion as we walked out he turned around and shouted by guys thanks for all the dong then everyone turned and looked at him in horror and his face turned bright red in embarrassment i mean cake i should mention he was from a very strict catholic family he totally meant dong shared a kiss with my cousin she kissed me and it held for one two seconds because both of us were drunk and i didn't want to be rough to just shove her away let's just say she had a crazy patch in her life initially this was cute until you said you were drunk suddenly it's clear you were adults and now it's hot back when i was in high school i worked with my girlfriend on weekends after work we'd go back to her house and usually had two-ish hours before her parents came home on some days we'd take a nap other days we'd watch a movie or fool around etc one fateful saturday our nap session turned into a frick session as an aside she was pretty loud especially when she thought no one was home so we get started and everything is coming along nicely when all of a sudden there's some aggressive banging on her bedroom door of course we freak out get dressed and open the door only to find that it was her sister's boyfriend messing with us so we shut the door and get back to business in a much more aggressive manner than initially her moaning is now more like yelling and i'm humping with reckless abandon when again there's another round of banging on the door this time we ignore it and keep going for another 10-ish seconds before we hear hear dad scream at us through the door he drove me home in his police cruiser immediately after that 45-ish minutes in silence with his shotgun in the back seat and a condom still on my super flaxseed dong when i was still in school i came home with my gf at the time we're upstairs in my room and she's giving me a bj across the room i see the door start to slowly and ridiculously silently open in walks my father sees me sees her most awkward eye contact ever in a panic i do the only thing i could think of i point him out the door just as quietly as he came in he was gone again and on that day he gained my eternal respect she still doesn't know tl dr dad was a bro when it counted most lomfeo probably the only response i have laughed at i can see a middle-aged man silently sneaking back through the door i was helping my then boyfriend's sister move into a new place and the keys were at the new house and someone needed to go get them so my boyfriend and i drove over to get them while we were there we did a little exploring of the new empty house we realized there was an attic and opened the ceiling door to let the steps down i climbed up first and being in a skirt gave my boyfriend a nice view we ended up freaking right there on the attic ladder and right in the middle we hear the door open boyfriend's name called out a pause and then the door shut we sheepishly return to the rest of the family at the old house to find his sister trying not to laugh hysterically she says their mother came over to try to find out what was taking so long upon her return she just loudly exclaimed they were freaking to this day it's our favorite phrase to exclaim then boyfriend to this day either you two are still good friends or got married i was on a road trip with my parents in the family dog after my brother went to college and we checked into a hotel room with two queen beds my parents took one the dog and i were in the other my dad wanted to gross me out and said now son if you hear anything in the middle of the night keep your eyes on that wall and pointed behind me with one hand putting his arm around my disgusted mom with the other i put my arm around the dog and said okay but i expect the same courtesy i was not going for a bestiality joke i was going for a master bash and joke and put my arm around the dog to try and look cool dog's name was chip not colby and this happened around 2002 this is the first one that got a laugh out of me well done teenage you my uncle is a pimp in gambia he's originally from england my cousin once went to stay with him towards the end of his first night though he was told he had a present waiting for him in bed goes upstairs to find a young lady completely nakedly across the bed not sure how long she'd been waiting a present in gambia is a surefire way to max out the plus plus plus on your hiv lottery card there and then growing up my brother and i used to share a room anyway one night i get woken up by moaning and sounds of pain i look over and my brother rolls out of bed clutching his stomach and runs out the room now imagine a chubby nine-year-old wearing nothing but loose boxes hobbling sprinting down the hall i'm hit with this foul foul smell and i look down and there is a trail of wet splattery poop everywhere brother finishes running slams into the bathroom and you can almost hear the sigh of relief except there wasn't turns out when he went to relieve his crappy bowels he had nothing left best part was that he didn't realize where the poop had gone until he walked out the bathroom to see his crappy legacy spread out behind him oh and fun fact we had extended family staying over that time notably the hot cousin he was crushing on one time when i was probably around 10 years old or so my cousin was visiting us and decided to play a little game with me granted i didn't quite understand the nuances of mixed families back then but i knew something was up because she had significantly darker skin than me us she looked a little like pocahontas to me well i lived with my single grandmother at the time my cousin was a couple of years older than me and i'm told we were good friends and we bathed together as kids i don't remember this was too young on this particular day we somehow ended up playing a game privately in my room wherein we would try to push each other over with a pillow and the loser had to reveal a private part she didn't even try i won over and over and she had the bigger pillow she showed me everything she had and i was flabbergasted i remember it vividly we never told anyone and i haven't seen her in over a decade incidentally yes i have tried to find her again no i have not been successful our families have drifted apart i met my eventual wife back in 2007 and the next summer her grandparents moved to town on the 4th of july 2008 i did what i did every fourth back then which was get a handle of jameson go to my friend's house swim in his pool get blackout drunk and eat grilled hot dogs and hamburgers all day long well at about 2pm my girlfriend eventual wife shows up at the house and asks if i'm ready to go come to find out she had already made plans to get off work early and go over to her grandparents house to have food and for me to meet them for the first time and i just forgot about it at least that's what she tells me i had already put away about a third of that handle so i was pretty lit but i gathered my wits and agreed to go well when i got there her grandfather greeted me with a shot of 149 proof whiskey and a cause light i drank that and a lot more that day so things went south pretty quick at this point i'm going off of what i've been told rather than what i remember but sometime that afternoon i decided that i needed to take a pee off the back porch in broad daylight in the suburbs it was all i could do to stand up at that point so of course i put my hand on something nearby so i could keep my balance that thing just happened to be a grill that had been cooking crap for several hours so my girlfriend's grandmother was closest to the door and when she heard a commotion she came outside to find me on the deck with my dong out pee everywhere holding my hand screaming why is this grill so goddamn hot that crazy bee told this story at my wedding in hindsight they were super cool about it but that was a crazy way to meet my eventual wife's grandparents i stayed with my parents after my brother's wedding my mother is a big lady and by big i mean huge my father the smaller is thick and tough at this point they were both well into their 50s and as far as i knew not active and private life so we're back at their apartment after the wedding everyone is a little buzzed but none of us are talking then i feel a strange unfamiliar tension between my parents they exchange glances seductive glances please god no my mother smiles at my dad i'm going to bed she said as she rose to her feet and waddled her way down the hallway into their bedroom moments later duog my dad looked at me thoroughly confused dualdug we both look down the hall nothing we look at each other do our lug both of our attention shifts to the hallway again but this time my mom's chubby naked leg slowly and seductively appears out from the doorway do our work my eyebrows shot up i stopped breathing i looked over at my father he looked nervously at me and then back at the tempting plump leg at the end of the hall do work my dad's eyes darted all over the place before finally landing on the floor he almost looked ashamed when he said i'm going to bed son as soon as he got up from his chair i began a frantic search for the remote control what took you so long soldier i shuddered as i hit the power button i have to choose a channel quickly terrible sounds that can't be unheard were happening down the hall i finally land on hbo schindler's list i turned that crap up to 11 so yeah i watched a holocaust movie while my parents boned in the next room edit gold that is so freaking kind thank you i'm glad you enjoyed the story do what i got to cramp in that spot of muscle under the lower jaw the one directly under the tongue while i was eating out my gf i stopped and fell on the floor trying to massage the muscle to relax because it hurt like heck my gf was super pee because she was second away from coming but she saw me and tried to help me so we're both there in the living room in my apartment half naked then i see the front door open my parents younger brother and a few of my teenage cousins started walking in it was a surprise visit and they just decided to let themselves in without even knocking my dad was first in and the sight of my gf's but was there to greet him i don't think i should continue this you kind of get the picture when i was 14 or so one of my cousins from mom's side of the family came with us to my grandparents dad's side of the family for christmas day we were staying there the night with my entire extended family which is a nightmare in itself my dad's brother after drinking all day and after finding out my cousin and i will be sharing a bed in the back of the 4wd comes up to me and says really slightly you and your little girlfriend are sharing a bed how i inform him that she is my cousin and he just looks blankly at me and says that's okay my first time was with my cousin i hadn't mentioned this to anyone because it was weird and made me a little uncomfortable but my cousin got married two weeks ago at the reception i told my dad about what his brother had said to me some 15 years ago my dad just looked at me and says yeah we both had our first times with shelly my family is a bunch of cousin suckers ugh comma for anna and asking my mum's name is michelle she gets called shelley by a family friend's kid it's awkward for me now comma my dad grew up in a small village of around 40 people 13 of which were his parents and siblings if the choice is frick your cousin or frick your sister probably choose cousin or neither i personally choose neither como we're in australia not the hillbilly redneck woods of the us just for your information comma shelly is around 65 now she's a couple of years older than my old boy my grandma told me one year at christmas that shelley had a couple of abortions back in the late 60s early 70s and she has ruined a handful of marriages she's never married or had kids she lives in a retirement village now and has told me on more than one occasion that she bones all the widowers in the retirement village she's a crass abrasive old crone who freaks good for her i guess anyone asking if i've ever met my aunt shelley or calling her an elf do you understand how familiar relationships work my dad's cousin is not my aunt she's my second cousin first cousin once removed dude you're not alone in that my ex's family talked about that with me when i was in high school it's not weird everyone messes with their cousins i show you show i touch you touch i kiss you kiss and that was her mom saying it lol good ol pencil turkey after dating my ex-ex-girlfriend for a few months some years back i was to go over their house for christmas eve and spend the night to open up presents and have breakfast on christmas morning me having my first real adult gf made this incredibly nerve-wracking i should also mention that i had a kidney transplant about four months prior as well so we get there around noon to start making spaghetti for everyone that night i'm fine with having a task like this as it allows me to focus on something other than my nerves once my part in that was over i decided to nervous drink and i nervous drank a lot since i had a transplant recently my tolerance was crap party was fun made friends had laughs but unfortunately i blacked out towards the end of the party her sister said she saw me in the dad's office laughing hysterically at the paper shredder laying in the hallway singing show tunes and running around the front of their house without my shirt or shoes on in december in the north the worst moment was after everyone passed out i was still up and moving around the next thing i knew i was being woken up by my gf yelling at me on christmas morning did you crap in the hallway last night she asks and i reply with the only answer i can come up with uh no she goes i bet you [ __ ] did so she goes into detective mode and pulls my pants down and looks at my ass crack i had cookie butt tldr stated at my gf parents house for christmas and their family woke up to two turds of my crap in their hallway and two turds of my crap in their toilet still i lost it at cookie but this is pretty tame but i was watching one of those real sx episodes on hbo late one night when i was about 12 13. they had some random montage in the middle of it with a variety of different videos a few seconds into that i realize i can hear the same background music coming from my parents room there was a scene where some guy pulls out his sklong that has multiple piercings all over it at the very same moment i hear my dad yell aww what the freaking reaction to it up until i was about 10 years old i was terrified of sleeping alone i would often wake up in the night bring my pillow and blanket into my parents room and sleep on the floor next to their bed often i would do this and they wouldn't even know i was there until morning so one night i go and sleep on their floor around midnight or so and i wake up a few hours later to hear my mother moaning i poked my head up and see my father plowing her from behind it was at this point my mom sees my head poking up from the side of the bed her and i lock eyes for about five seconds and then she shrieks in horror and runs out of the room i just put my head down and pretended to be asleep this was never spoken of my then-girlfriend now wife had a super nsw moment when her mother ran through her phone and accidentally saw our video of her giving me intense head i sent her the video because she wanted to see but forgot to delete it she was then given the wraith of her entire family when they found out kicked her out the house etc to this day her family doesn't know that i know they saw the video discovered my cousin is a p star sorry i won't link you to the videos or they might take longer to load for me i was living at my parents house while in college and having come home with my fiance from work one night sitting on the coffee table was a condom rapper so i just hollered up the stairs at my dad and said that i found a condom wrapper and everything he comes trotting down the stairs and snatched up the rapper and said if i've told your ten-year-old brother once i've told him a million times i've got two the first one was when i was probably seven or eight my dad was at his computer which was right by the kitchen and by the living room you had to go by him to go to the living room well he was jerking it pretty good just right at his computer i would walk out there and he'd slip his johnson back into his boxes and i walked out there multiple times to him doing this he yelled at me and my sister multiple times to go back to our rooms second one when i was 17 i was skyping this girl and we were having cybersex and i was jerking it on the camera for her so my desk was right by my door you open the door even a little you can see me in all my glory well i'm jerking it off to school while talking to this girl and my sister and my mom both walk in on my jerking it on camera and my sister's boyfriend was there too it was incredibly embarrassing spelling i have more nsw moments one of them being that i've walked in on my mother naked more than i care to admit and i've walked in on my parents and stepped doing the ultimate dirty way more times than i should admit the girl i was jerking off for thought it was really funny when my mom walked in and then my sister she couldn't stop laughing like father like son i took pics of my dong for research purposes with the laptop's webcam when i was a teen and one day my dad was showing his friend some of his photos and my phallus popped up i think it's safe to say he was shocked because i've never heard him say god and get this turd out of my sight before i slap him silly again tl dr my dad was just out of the shower mom chased him around the house with a cow's tongue licking him with it as he screamed in horror like a little girl mumbai's cow tongue from the butcher cooks and eats them some sort of old family recipe thing dad found it gross and was gagging as mom chased him with the raw cow tongue he was naked she laughed aesthetically that's pretty freaking hilarious if you ask me if you are new to the channel you can subscribe i publish new videos every day until then check another video [Music] bye for now

Channel: Updoot Everything

Views: 47,828

Rating: 4.9031143 out of 5

Keywords: worst family, worst family ever, family, weird family, family moments, awkward family moments, #updootst, updoot, reddit, r/askreddit, askreddit, ask reddit, r/, \r, r\, best of reddit, reddit stories, reddit story, top posts, funniest posts, funny, funny posts, funny reddit stories, funny askreddit, reddit funny, askreddit funny, askreddit stories, people of reddit, sub, reddit cringe, memes, toadfilms, updoot everything, updoot reddit, story, stories, rslash, comedy, reddit stories 2020

Id: 36KW917f8bo

Length: 24min 36sec (1476 seconds)

Published: Sun Sep 20 2020