What's Your "Craziest Neighbor" Story? (r/AskReddit)

does anyone have any crazy neighbor stories I was on my way home from a night out in town when I saw my 86 year old neighbor chasing a thief down the street with two butchers knives he was only wearing a thong while doing so I am the crazy neighbor although I was told people think that cause I'm a single guy who lives by himself and rarely goes out of his way to talk to people I'm just keeping up the stereotype so when they're interviewed they can use the cliche he was such a nice quiet young man I go out of my way to avoid talking to my neighbors as well mostly because I dislike most people I found out last week that one of my neighbors is actually a very good friend of mine we've been living alongside each other for over two years and just never knew it fast neighbor to try and keep her dogs from barking at night while we were sleeping a few nights later she was out there barking herself to encourage the dogs to make noise depends on how you define crazy my family had a slow-burning feud with our neighbors for several years revolving around the behavior of their batch it's crazy twin boys age 8 - 11 ish I'm relatively convinced that those two would spend most of their day wanting for my parents to drop off our babysitter and then leave our babysitter was easily frightened and even more terrified of being labeled a tattletale hence the nigma boys found their had run of the place in the four or so years that they decided to terrorize our babysitter a favorite of theirs became doing mundane active I'd stark naked in the backyard this included playing soccer eating a picnic Krogh a buidling a campsite with fire and two tents roasting marshmallows archery practice jumping rope mowing our lawn wrestling one of the neighborhood stray dogs babysitter informed my sister and I that this would be a secret so for years this activity would continue every summer this came to an end the year the twins took their naked frolics a bit too far somehow they had procured a large stockpile of m80 firecrackers or something to that effect it was only a matter of time until they had invented a new game involving of fixing a firecracker to the end of an arrow and firing straight up into the air with the hopes that the arrow would land in the branches of any of our 20 fruit trees and pick the apples for them when my parents came home to find nearly two dozen explore defied aluminum arrow shafts and a yard full of fruit pulp and leaves questions were asked I'm not sure how everything went down on the twin side of things but we never saw their naked asses again we had some neighbors that bred miniature toy poodles they were very neglectful of the dogs and often let him outside for hours at a time in extreme hot and cold so the dogs spent a lot of time yapping incessantly at the back door we lived in a townhouse development so our yards were all very close to each other being a butt hole teenager I would open the window and yell out the window at the dogs mostly to embrace the neighbors surveyed less Emin and would sometimes call their house and say let your dogs in before hanging up I did call Animal Services on them once but they said there was nothing they could do because we weren't technically in the city limits WTF well one day another neighbor apparently had enough and put rat poison in fire yard one of the dogs was killed and another neighbor started a rumor that I was the one that did it we had no clue this series of events happened until I caught her daughter stealing things from our backyard when my mother confronted the woman about it she raged on our doorstep that everyone knows Zipporah killed that dog everyone knows she's a Satan worshipper and she sacrificed her dog eventually it got around not only my school but other schools in the area really sucked B was insane had about four different boyfriends and never supervised her children while they ran wild outside in various states of dress and undress especially if she had a boyfriend over it sucked for me because that rumor made my life heck for months it didn't help that I was go five ER when I first read your post it actually took me a minute to realize that you real name probably isn't Zipporah I had a neighbor that used to mow her lawn in a bikini and military boots I always wanted that neighbor post-college moved into a nice little duplex the neighborhood was nice save for one thing there were feral cats freaking everywhere both meanings applicable I don't mind captain they disappeared if any human was about but I swear to God there were more every day but next door neighbor was an elderly shut-in and early one morning I looked out my window to see her shuffling out onto her front porch with a few cans and three big barrels and the cats my god the cats she looked like a conductor in front of an orchestra yowling mange there must have been at least 60 from mewling kittens too stocky Tom's all awaiting their daily meal they hoard evil the cans of food in less than a minute and scampered off and the little old lady shuffled happily back inside I suppose this had gone on every day for years sometime later about a month before I was to move out her children move my neighbor lady to a retirement community I came home one afternoon to the Kitty chorus in on her empty porch confused and unfed I checked on them throughout the day they eventually all straggled off the next day I left my house just before dawn to come into work I opened my front door and stared into a sea of flashing yellow eyes they had moved on I had been selected I was a successor I froze it was silent like a scene from the birds after about 30 seconds I began to slowly proceed down my front stairs the cats moved to a cadet my steps but otherwise sat and stared fixated eventually I got to my car and drove off I could see them in my rearview mirror still staring all the way down the street I never gave them food and moved out soon after they watched me pack I moved across town but I'm still a little scared that two years later I'll look out my front door to a sea of shining hungee eyes you'd better hope no one ever figures out your identity because any true friend of yours will be required to use this as the basis for the greatest prank ever I personally would build some sort of bank outlets to look like thousands of casts watching you watching you when I was little the next-door neighbor had about a hundred snakes and lizards and lots of bushes in his overgrown yard I was recently informed that the bushes were in fact marijuana I didn't know what that was when I was seven I once had an illuminating conversation with some neighbors about high wattage electrical control systems and lighting as well as absurd lehigh year-round electrical costs my perspective on the matter was from herpetology there's from running a grow house I think in that neighborhood everyone was the crazy neighbor sort of a neighbor story I mean she lived in the apartment above me lived in a basement apartment and she was my landlord I moved into this great-looking basement apartment wood floors full kitchen huge space all utilities plus internet included so a week after I move and we have been getting a lot of rain and the back part of the apartment started to flood I came home from work one day and saw this pool of water at the back of the apartment I immediately go upstairs to her apartment and tell her that my apartment is flooding she says oh yeah I forgot to tell you about that it sometimes does that so I'm like um well you're planning on fixing this right and she sighs and says yeah I'll get someone in tomorrow to look at it so this someone comes quotes are on a price to fix it and it takes them icrap you not almost two months to repair the leaks all this time I have to get up super early to let the guy in and then they had to do work outside of the house so I could never sleep in on weekends she went through two to three contractors to get this fixed and even after it was fixed it still leaked sometimes the breakers for the house are in my apartment and I guess there needed to be electrical work done so without notification her and the electrician go into my apartment while I'm at work to fix whatever I come home that night to see my front door open and my screen door closed suspiciously I walk in to find one of my cats missing call the landlord hey were you in my apartment today oh yeah I had to do some work on the breaker box okay have you seen my other cat oh uh yet he's stuck in the wall what sure enough the cat had jumped onto my dresser and into the open paneling for the breaker box and got himself stuck inside the wall I had to cut a hole in the wall to get him out lord knows how long he was in there she would enter my apartment all the time without notifying me and steal my light bulbs yes my light bulb Asst several times I would come home to turn on lamps only to find the light bulbs were gone another time she left my door open and one of my cats got out I spent seven hours searching the neighborhood for him only to find him two blocks away I moved out after six months she was stealing your light bulbs so she could use them to smoke em never trust anyone with no light bulbs in their lamps at age 16 we had a severely alcoholic neighbor who was divorced from his wife and had a son one day I am chilling in my room smoking weed with my friend Dave and out or nowhere we hear knocking on our patio glass door back of the house a little puzzled I go over to see who it is it was my neighbor stumbling while holding his crying two-year-old son in his arms I call Dave over to check it out and open the door the neighbor stares artists blankly for about 30 seconds hands me the child and says so Dave yeah getting a little edgy won a fight he picked up his arms to a fighting position then immediately passed out and went into fetal position on our patio we brought the kid in fed him he was pretty hungry and gave him some of my nephew's cloths he had a sticky residue all over you know more than 30 minutes later his mom shows up gives the father a good kick in the gut while passed out and storms out paying us $40 for taking care of the child we later find out he got arrested two days later for taking a chainsaw to our other neighbors patio I don't know where they are at the moment but I can provide pictures of their patio if people don't believe Dave's not here man I lived across the street from a 3-story Rehabilitation Center people who came there were usually coming off fog drugs homeless who had come from broken homes they were pretty well behaved so the strangest thing we would see was people sneaking in and out of the rooms at night one night I smoked a joint to myself and spun a few records on my turntables I had gotten some massive speakers at a pawn shop and had really been enjoying them the music sounded so good that night I played my heart out by myself and got so into it for hours when I was done I went outside for a cigarette to my surprise the roof of the rehab center was filled with people like they were at an outdoor concert they all started cheering as soon as I walked out I was really embarrassed and stoned so I just walked inside in disbelief but haha awesome I can picture that you're all thinking wow I am high really really high I'm just going to go back inside now next-door neighbor just began a jail sentence for providing tax help that was actually tax evasion corner of the block just finishing house arrest sentence for scamming people out of their retirement savings down the street middle of a jail sentence for using her dry cleaning business to launder money added bonus all three were members of her I crap you not neighborhood swingers club for using her dry-cleaning business to launder money not so much a story about a crazy neighbor but a crazy neighbor story last year a large group 10-14 of my friends were coming back very late from a party for a sh in the morning and I told them they could swing by my apartment the group was up so late because about half of em were tripping and the other half was drunk they got confused about what apartment was mine and walked into my neighbor's by accident and when they walks in he was just standing in his living room completely naked rubbing one out they were all flicked up and confused so they just started yelling and laughing and didn't leave right away he came by the next day didn't mention it at all said he had matured a lot over the past few days or some crap like that and moved a day or two later I felt kind of bad for him because I can't even imagine what it's like to have a group of strangers walk in on you masturbating but it was hilarious at the time still is in that story you're the crazy neighbor who I've got stories I'll keep them as short as possible I grew up in an apartment complex and that's where this stuff happened there was a pimp running a prostitution ring out of the rear most apartment he had multiple girls most were massively obese and one had the name Darrel tattooed in big fat gothic script across her boobs the letters were a good 5 inches high Daryl was the name of the pimp of course a Tweaker moved in next door to me I was friends with the manager at the time and found out the woman's previous landlord just raved about how awesome and amazing she was she was batshit insane and he just wanted her gone a [ __ ] son alcohol and M during pregnancy equals freaked up kid stabbed a kid by the swimming pool she had a restraining order placed against him but he still dropped by on occasion to give her M one morning at around 2:00 a.m. I awoke to the sound of her hammering and screws into the strike plate of her door she'd slammed it once too many times and was trying to fix it she seemed incapable of grasping that you cannot hammer in a screw there was a hoarder who lived in the apartment above ours when she moved out it was like a freaking clown car of crap box after box after box after box after bag after bag after box it never freakin ended a week after she left we noticed him nice cockroach infestation taking root apparently they'd gotten hungry and decided to move through the walls and join us I felt a hair tickling my neck one night and swatted it only to hear the splat of a cockroach thorax against my ear bug until I was eight years old two houses down from our house lived a retired couple it was the early 80s they had a nice lawn with several good young shade trees they also had a little Boston Terrier named Jerry they would sit in lawn chairs in their front yard both wearing opaque sunglasses in silence when we would play outside they would stare at us 99.9% of the time in silence watching our every move as Jerry would occasionally run and crap in our yard when a bull would land in their yard as they sat coolly observing us with Robert like patience we would have to run up and grab it as their cold eyes tracked us perfectly from behind their opaque sunglasses never a word being said I have no memory of them sipping the drinks they constantly had in their hands we learned that if we wanted to play in the front yard we would have to run outside and look to our right to see if the neighbors were there I swear we would go around the corner of the garage and they would already be staring at us waiting for us to emerge from behind the corner so they could in silence watch our every move or if Jerry suddenly ran up to pee in our yard we knew the front yard was under surveillance it seems some people actually emerge from the world and David Lynch films I was telling my neighbor about how I ended up with my dog I explained that he'd come from the shelter and that he had been through several people before ending up with my business partner my business partner quit and left the dog I told her that I never wanted a dog but that since he had been abandoned so many times that I was not going to do that to him again instead of understanding that I was saying that while I didn't previously want a dog that because this dog had separation anxiety and had already been dumped several times that I was not going to be like the rest of his owners I came home to see that my dog wasn't a note on my door we found a good home for your dog he's in the San Juan Islands with a good friend of ours WTF I was livid my very soon-to-be ex-wife went over there and chewed her a new one and he was brought back home I had him for 13 years I guess they meant well but that's really odd oh lordy thanks for bringing up these memories I had a neighbor who was mentally more than a bit off he had just moved in and I took the opportunity to introduce myself he was really chatty and intense but that's not a bad thing he worked from home doing tech support for a nationwide health insurance company one morning around 6:00 a.m. I woke up to very loud music coming from his house I went into the back blurry-eyed and to my disbelief I found him blaring Apache by Sugar Hill Gang at full blast from his living room sound system this went on for about an hour and a half and I could hear him whooping and hollering like he was having the em time of his life that's not too bad a thing it gave me a good laugh then he bought a little Cadillac SUV that he was super proud of he got the exhaust modified so it would sound throaty he would sit in his driveway revving the engine for up to ten minutes at a time sometimes several times a month when I was outside he would come rolling down the street in his throaty SUV windows down blasting ac/dc he would slow to a crawl as he passed in front of our house maintain eye contact and furiously pump his fists in the air that's not a bad thing necessarily just a little disconcerting then one day the police showed up to our house they said someone had called 9-1-1 from our house i asked around nobody had called very weird then it happened again the very next week again nobody claimed to have called the cops then it happened again you get the idea we were three 20-somethings living together and with all the bongs and bags lying around we were a bit karani at about the cops showing up just whenever finally one morning I woke up to a voice I didn't recognize calling out from downstairs I opened my bedroom door and found a police officer in full uniform standing on the stairs inside the house what the frick same story somebody called 9-1-1 from this number and he was determined to look around a bit they must have thought we had someone chained up a back room and they were periodically escaping to call the cops but we were all pretty freaked out but eventually we got the cop back outside and I tried to get to the bottom of this crap what number did you receive the call from yours I know but what was the exact phone number not my phone number I stopped and suddenly recognized the phone number it was the second phone line we had installed back in the days of 56k modems when we switched to cable we never had the line connected I looked over towards the IT savvy psychotic bat-crap crazy neighbor's house and suddenly everything made sense there on the property line between our yards was our mutually shared telephone service box I walked over and sure enough the cover had been torn open and there was a secondary line tapping into our houses second phone line that's an offer BEC that is a terrible thing one time my best friend and I both girls were in her front lawn playing with her cat we were about 16 at the time then all of a sudden we hear go get them go do it it takes us about three minutes to triangulate and locate the voice finally we saw my friend's neighbor this insane old guy sitting on his porch enthusiastically encouraging his dog to attack us the cat thankfully the dog was dumb as a brick and horribly trained because all that came from the man's urgings was a generally excited dog face but it was still creepy we yelled across the street to him excuse me are you trying to get your dog to attack us and he and fat eclis shouted back a jumble of words that included yes goddamn kids and frickin cats the rest of it was unintelligible we kind of ambled inside dragging the cat with us in case the old man was successful in getting the dog to attack it and just sat there really confused for about an hour then my friend's mom got home we told her what had happened cops were called etc I just had a permanent WTF face that entire day he has since been arrested for being a Pia file I see what's going on here what he's doing is kind of like what young boys do to girls in their class pretend to hate or shun them and then chase them around for making them feel all of these confusing emotions since he's a pol it makes sense why he would have similar behavior towards you we used to live next to a guy that would grow a weed in his backyard the first year he did it he only had a few plants and pulled them a little early so as not to grow them too tall the next year Wow he built a greenhouse in his backyard and had at least 12 growing we lived on a fairly busy street on one side of his yard was our yard the other surrounding area was a church parking lot anyways he grew at least 12 plants and they grew to around six feet tall I thought that was pretty crazy best part was when he came over with the top of a plant cut off and bundled in a newspaper handed it to me and said thanks for not ratting on me that was pretty awesome I need to move my neighbor story took place throughout my childhood this guy lived six houses down from my family and he was put into a care center after his last stunt rumor had it he was a nice guy before his wife left him for someone else but I only knew him during his insane period I'm sure there were more events that took place but there were certainly a few that stuck out in my mind and starting with the mild and going to the insane the first time I actually witnessed him being crazy I was playing street hockey with some friends when we noticed ray the neighbor was on his roof all of my friends continued playing but I just kinda watched him wondering what was going on next thing I know he picks up his cat which I hadn't noticed prior and throws it off the roof to make matters worse he climbed off the roof and continued to do this a couple more times my next-door neighbor was a firefighter and my parents weren't home so I told him what was going on and the police were called don't know what kind of trouble he got into but after that I started lurking around his house more to see what would happen and it only got better but one day I noticed all of his windows were blown out I again told my neighbor cops were called and apparently he had made some very basic bombs and blown up not only his windows but also all of the electronics in his home he once hadn't been seen in a while so Phil the firefighter knocked on the door to make sure he was okay Phil walked and when nobody answered and found him staring at a TV with just static playing and a cockroach taped to it one day we noticed insane amounts of water flowing into the street from his property the lawn was flooded etc when some other parents asked him why all his faucets were on I mean hoses indoor faucets everything he told them he was trying to float his house into the road on the bus home when driving down my street towards my stop we had to stop in front of his house I looked outside to see him fishing rod in hand trying to reel in the giant yellow bus he had just caught one winter morning we awoke to his old truck on fire and him dancing around it with nothing on except his boxers this one freaked out the firefighter and this was the last day our neighbor was on our block I've only got one crazy neighbor story but it is pretty memorable I was maybe 7 8 at a time and they had always been this kind of strange guy that lived across the street from us he pretty much kept to himself he was always outside working on his truck and that was it well one evening I'm climbing a tree and end up sliding most of the way down it getting freaking massive splinters in my feet the whole way down being about eight years old this is a big freakin deal so for about an hour my mom proceeds to pull all these splinters out with me screaming and crying bloody murder near the time this happened it had gotten dark so in the middle of this episode our neighbor literally kicks in our frickin front door with a shotgun and what looked like some sort of homebrew tactical gear the guy's practically dripping her now he swings the gun around on us my mom screams her head off and kind off covers me with her body but I can see this dude from under her arms he looks kind of lost and confused for a moment and then his eyes widen and he gets this oak crap look on his face and walks out the now destroyed door cops never called our rather cool neighbor who is a firefighter went over to talk to ramble here and it turns out the guy thought I was being killed in my living room so he told up to come rescue me or some guy but kind of odd aaww he was trying to save you what a heartwarming tale my dad's neighbor is legitimately insane he thinks that he alone is in charge of the United States government and he has told us on numerous occasions that he just keeps a staff of actors to pretend to be government officials so that no one learns the truth according to him Obama is just a really good actor that he hired to pretend to be president when I was a kid my neighbor shot his wife and the SWAT team had to come and disarm him a few years later his son killed someone's Orson kept its leg in his freezer that family was all kinds of crazy Frick it took me a minute to remember this one when I was about eight or nine I was a lonely homeschool chap and had a couple of very odd friends one of them was just another similar kid who lived down the street but it turns out he didn't go to school because his dad was a rim dealer this didn't affect his life or our friendship much for a while until one day his dad has a garage sale selling everything he owns he had so much gold-plated crap it was insane corny as heck like Carl from a THF type crap so a couple days later there's a SWAT team raid on his house nine or ten cop cars the giant van everything I was just walking to the 7-eleven to get a Slurpee see that and do a 180 what was going on inside the house though was something I'd never forget once I saw it later apparently he was arrested naked screaming and going totally opposite chased down by cops with shotguns through the house they left the house how it was and I couldn't help but go he had written on the walls with crap as in fesses everywhere he must have pooped and saved it for days to have this much crap to write with it was on basically every wall on the main floor I don't think I'll ever forget that it said funny stuff too like you can't stop Emmy and Superman and stuff the guy who lived across the street from us was a rather well-to-do lawyer type of some sort one day he walks into his garage only to find a gentleman with a gun in a rolled-up newspaper who proceeds to shoot my neighbor in the neck neighbor actually lived we took care of his kids for the day and were asked to keep them away from the windows we had a crazy woman who threatened to run my father over in front of witnesses for his reporting her dogs were chasing him down and biting him badly while he was riding his bike she would fire her gun in the air and blast music loudly to try and intimidate us she also threw nails nails in our driveway and tried to run my father off the road she wound up killing herself in an accident when she got mad at her husband and tried to drag race him she hit a tree snapped her neck and nearly [ __ ] her arm clean off going though the windshield world is a better place without her sometimes these things sort themselves out if you are new to the channel you can subscribe I publish new videos every day until then check another video [Music] bye for now [Music]

Channel: On Tap Studios

Views: 38,387

Rating: 4.9048605 out of 5

Keywords: crazy neighbor, crazy neighbor storytime, crazy neighbors 2020, crazy neighbours, crazy neighbors from hell, neighborhood, #updootst, updoot, reddit, r/askreddit, askreddit, ask reddit, r/, \r, r\, best of reddit, reddit stories, reddit story, top posts, funniest posts, funny, funny posts, funny askreddit, reddit funny, askreddit funny, askreddit stories, sub, reddit cringe, memes, comment awards, dankify, toadfilms, updoot everything, updoot reddit, chill, story, stories, reddit on tap

Id: bQjVKdTGKuM

Length: 29min 17sec (1757 seconds)

Published: Wed May 20 2020