What Was Your "Bullet Dodged" Moment?

what is your bullet fricking dodge moment my great great grandfather had a ticket for the titanic but met my great-great-grandmother who was going to america sooner he decided he couldn't wait to see her again and bought a ticket for an earlier boat iceberg dodged back when i was young and impressionable someone stopped me on the street and asked if i'd like to do a free personality test after enthusiastically filling out the answers to a long list of probing questions the person who'd approached me asked how old i was since i was under 18 they said they'd have to get a parent's permission to give me my results they call my mum who tells them to stick their test up their ass or words to that effect then proceeds to give me an extended talking to about trusting strange people with my personal information and that's how i learned who the church of scientology were holy crap dude you definitely dodge a bullet went on a date once with the photographer from my cousin's wedding i was in the wedding party so we spent much of the day chatting he was good looking and amicable so i figured why not we went for coffee and it was perfectly pleasant we chatted about the usual stuff he told me more about his upcoming photo tour of europe nothing unusual but nothing special either got an awkward one-armed hug at the end and he said we'd get in touch when he was back which was about four months time four months came and went and i just let it go it had been pleasant but tepid and i guess i kind of forgot about it jump ahead a few years and i'm browsing the news and i see a familiar face the photographer who is now in jail for an unprecedented collection of unique child pee that he made more of which authorities guest was on the hard drive with military level encryption they'd seized that police still couldn't crack years later that photography tour of europe yeah he was in thailand cool cool cool cool well that escalated quickly to disturbing levels so in 2006 i was losing weight so that i could finally afford health insurance i figured out that if i lost 60 pounds a 5 000 deductible plan would be roughly 100 more cheaper in 2007 i've lost the weight and i get insurance on the 1st of february and go to get my first check up in a long while everything comes back clean the 15th of march i go home and my dad a physician doesn't like the look of me and takes me to get some scans turns out the weight i lost was due to cancer in the previous doc had fricked up and not run the right tests but because he had fricked up and given me a clean bill of health the insurance company couldn't claim that the cancer was a pre-existing condition despite by having insurance for 90 days cancer is all gone but i didn't get stuck with a half a million dollar hospital bill because of a doc who fricked up i was making a day trip in colorado to do some sightseeing it was just me and the dog driving a few hours over wolf creek pass i felt a little often stopped up near the top of the pass to get some fresh air at a waterfall i figured i was just sleepy and at altitude so i decided to actually hike the mile round trip to the falls and wake up a bit on the way back down the trail i had a seizure if i'd not stopped i would have been coming down the path when it happened that's a really steep past descending into pagosa springs i'm guessing you stopped at treasurefalls that could have been really bad you really did dodge one worked for a campus pd while i was in college had been unsuccessfully flirting a bit with one of our part-time clerks who was a mother twice over at 22 living in section 8 housing etc not a bad thing in and of itself just providing some context my longtime girlfriend had bounced a few months back so i had thrown myself into my work and was advancing quickly in the department well enough that i had a salaried slot on the horizon feeling good about things in general i figured i'd just roll with it when she suddenly started giving me the time of day had our first big night of romance coming on a saturday night when i get a text from ofc derp that just said cancel now wttyl wasn't sure wtf was up but i did just that called her up on the spot and said sorry problem with my car no way i could get it to a shop and out in time for our date she didn't have a car few hours later i swing by the pd and he told me what had happened she had worked earlier in the day and was at the front desk not realizing ofc derp was in the squad room you can hear conversations up front from there he overheard her on her cell talking to one of her girlfriends about how she was going to get paid tonight girl followed by no i'm only like five weeks he won't be able to tell cause the dates will be close god bless you brian god bless you christ brian is the man meningitis 2 30 a.m couldn't sleep 3 30 a.m i'm having spinal taps done at a medical center two doctors gave me 15 survival upon arrival 24 hours later i moved to haiku for the next eight days last day in hospital they told me i'd dodge a bullet matrix style and should not be here i had my police car pulled over off the side of this rural road with the emergency lights on i had stopped because there was a man splayed out in the middle of the asphalt turns out he was super drunk and decided to take a nap during his walk home i had just helped him to his feet and placed him in the back of the car to drive him home when i hear an engine revving hard i closed the car door and straightened up just in time to have my car smashed out from in front of me by a pickup truck i felt the truck side mirror clip my body armor the driver was drunk and had decided to go looking for his drunk friend that friend was the guy i just picked up the guy in the back seat survived the impact because those old crown victorias had massive trunks the driver went to the hospital and in the coming months he plead guilty to impaired driving i remember the collision analysis showed that the guy hit my car at 145 kilometers per hour it was a wild night and i still have major hang ups when i have to stop my police car on roadways i had a type of bone cancer ewing sarcoma when i was 10 it usually shows up in the bone itself which usually makes one lose whichever limb the bone is in mine fortunately started in the surrounding flesh and was working its way towards the bone the tumor grew so fast that i only realized it when i bumped my leg against a rock that i should not have hit the tumor was about the size of a soft ball because of finding it like this we got to it early enough that it could be removed before it reached the bone i still got nine months of chemo to make sure it was all removed though i kept my leg although i have a large scar on the outside of my left leg above the knee running to mid thigh and a large dip in the same area also have some kidney damage relating to the type of chemo they gave me although things are looking up there this may i was six years cancer free and i would have lost my leg if we wouldn't have caught it any later my condolences to those who have lost someone to a yes i had the same dang kind of cancer and the same thing happened to me it hit my left arm and i don't have a shoulder joint anymore i came this freaking close to losing an arm i went on one date with a girl i worked with she was cute but there were red flags some obvious some not so much she had been in jail and had an ankle monitor that was probably the biggest red flag other than that she just seemed a little off things fizzled easily enough between us no harm done and we didn't even do anything to make life at work awkward then a co-worker starts dating her and before too long both of them weren't working there any more for unrelated reasons we end up finding out later she murdered the guy she stabbed him like 20 30 times in the back with a kitchen knife it was very sad he was a good guy and definitely didn't deserve to go out like that i learned this all secondhand from mutual friends after i had lost contact with him [Music] was traveling to somewhere on a highway behind a logging truck when we were going uphill the truck changed lanes and a log slipped off bounced between the car i was in and another car and rebounded off the highway into the nearby forest there was no one immediately behind us lived outside of saint louis in my early childhood woke up screaming in the worst pain of my life and then felt my face get sprinkled with something i actually got shot in the hip and when i sat up a bullet went through my window right where my head was just at and what sprinkled me in the face was tiny pieces of glass so i dodged a little bullet by taking a bullet really expected this to get lost in the source but here are some details someone else asked about so my bed was right next to my bedroom window parallel to the wall the end of the bed where my head was it was right next to the window the bullet entered the wall and struck me in my left hip so i guess i was sleeping on my stomach the windows were real weird now that i think about it it was actually two single pane pieces of glass separated by six inches and since both of them had a hole in them you could stick a rod in and see that the bullet traveled right where my head had just been on my pillow another side story connected to this now that i think about those windows one time i came home from school i noticed the inner window was shattered and there was blood all over the place turned out it was my dog that tried to launch herself through the window we were pretty certain that someone was at my window scoping it out she was super defensive of all of us i'm pretty sure this actually occurred after the shooting before my wife and i met she had a single date with someone the date went fine but she found him to be overbearing he pulled his dong out for her to touch as an example so they didn't go out again they remained friendly until two weeks later when he murdered his next date and set her on fire he is now imprisoned for those who may want to know update he shot and killed her in front of her kids and then set her house on fire sorry for my partial inaccuracy whoa that uh that escalated pretty quickly and i thought it was bad to begin with my ex-boyfriend told me he was sterile i started insisting on condoms anyway just in case eventually i broke up with him he currently has two kids with the girl he started dating after me that would be really awkward if he was telling the truth and those kids and his js saying bullet freaking dodge really down please the seriousness of this situation when i was in my early twenties i went out to the bar with some friends one night my friend was dd and i was drinking i had a very solid buzz going on when i bumped into someone i knew from hs who was clearly flirting with me i ended up leaving my friends and catching a cab back to her apartment the next morning i found out my friend who was supposed to dd got drunk then behind the wheel he ended up getting into an accident and while no one had any critical injuries there were a few broken bones etc i could have very easily have been in that car instead i had fricked my now wife talk about fate yup i dodged a lift home one night where they crashed one guy died and another was in a coma for months thank frick when i was back in high school i was walking near the field when they were practicing their discus throw one of the discus was wrongly thrown and was headed for my head a friend who at that time was walking towards me saw this and yelled for me to duck the discus went past my head and landed behind me then i realized that i could have died if my friend haven't warned me imagine a two kilogram flying disc lands right on your forehead i dodge a bullet by not marrying my ex-fiance i can't have kids and i told him that early on and when he did propose i asked him again and multiple times thereafter if he was sure that he would never change his mind i don't want someone marrying me and then resenting me feeling like they're missing out he reassured me time and time again that he didn't want kids and never really had five months before our wedding he broke up with me with this big story about how he felt like we had been growing apart and he didn't have the same feelings anymore and maybe he would want children someday and blah blah blah i was devastated of course and then furious when i found out the real reason he had been cheating on me and knocked some girl up they got married a few months after the baby was born and then not long after that she got pregnant again before that baby was born that butthole that complete and utter piece of crap contacted me and had a big long sob story about how he had made a mistake how his life was sueru hard how he didn't like being a father and how i was so much nicer and his wife was such a bee probably because she actually needed him to help around the house and with the baby and get a freaking job instead of sitting on his butt watching youtube all day not sure why i ever wanted to marry this butthole in the first place tbh then has an afterthought he threw in that he missed me i told him to frick off he and his first wife have now divorced and he is married to yet another woman who he knocked up on accident their kid is a little under a year old and word on the street is that he is still a cheating lazy butthole i am so freaking glad that this crap all happened before we got married instead of after the broken engagement was brutal but much better than if we had been married the night of the aurora theater shooting in colorado some friends and i had planned to go to the aurora movie theater for batman as we are all huge batman fans one of my friends convinced us to go to a different theater that was closer to her since she couldn't get a ride couple people we were supposed to meet up with in aurora were in the theater but luckily got out unharmed guess that's a bullet dodged i read a verified thread on reddit from a woman who was in the theater it was horrifying i'm glad your other friends were okay when a friend who i hadn't spoke to much at the time of this story changed his profile picture to him and his mum i was going to comment something jokey about how she was good looking like who's that stunner next to you however i hesitated as i hadn't spoke to him in a while and it would seem weird thankfully i did hesitate and objects to doing it as when i saw that post on facebook the next day it was flooded with messages wishing him strength as his mother had just died of cancer who's that drop dead gorgeous gal next to you sly dog i once took a girl online out to dinner at a nicer place in our town she was horrible to the server and actually got us kicked out because she called the manager a c after that we were walking out and she wanted me to go back to her place to watch a movie which i refused and went home two months later i was reading the paper and saw her in the police blotter for assaulting her boyfriend with a golf club good thing she didn't ask you to go clubbing with her then was bouldering unprotected in the owens valley like an idiot descending slipped fell six feet down with outward momentum onto a 10-foot wide shelf only just stopping myself before the 50-foot drop to death injury pain still spooks the heck out of me to think about boulderers are too scared of heights to be in that situation lol i just survived a heart attack on thursday so there's that btw i'm 33 way too young for this crap to all of those asking not overweight skipped class to watch a segment on a morning talk show with my favorite actor avoided a school shooting had i gone i would have been in the cafeteria right when and where the shooter started his spree crap i literally forgot about the time when i faked being sick and stayed home to watch tv and some guy ended up stabbing people during my lunch period i don't think i would have been one of the people he targeted knives are a little more specific than guns but yeah totally forgot that happened i had a co-worker who was an avid runner he was really thin and in good shape i ran into him in public with his family for the first time he was with an obese woman who looked to be much older than him after greeting him i stupidly naively was two seconds from saying in this must be your mom before he cut me off and said silas meet my wife laura in my defense it was around christmas and i had heard he was having relatives visit dang you didn't dodge a bullet that guy saved you from a bullet not me but i had a hand in it knew this guy in high school peripherally he was in the cool crowd of rocker type guys and i was a nerd new girl arrived at our school from another town she and i became friends and a few months later she started dating him at first she seemed cool and we would talk about everything at one point however she starts talking about how she has been hooking up with her ex-boyfriend behind cool guys back just before the end of the school year she tells me she is pregnant and that she knows it belongs to her ex-boyfriend she is laughing and really proud of herself because cool guy is going to do the right thing withdraw his college application and go work at the local gas station to support her and the baby her ex the father of the baby is kind of a loser so she thinks it's the best thing even that she can freak him while making cool guy support her i didn't really know this guy that well but i got his phone number from an acquaintance of mine who knew it a cool guy knew i was friends with his girlfriend but was still pretty surprised to hear from me i told him all about her ploy and said get a paternity test it isn't yours this guy was incredibly stoic but after a sizeable pause he just broke down crying for a few minutes then thank me they broke up and cool guy went to college and made something of his life i think this and the goth couple are my favorite stories this one you're just like an avenging angel coming in like the worst moment of the dude's life to tell him now you can carry on with your plans bro you're done good op when i was seven i got lost in spain without my family i had been lost for about five hours really late at night and had been going down some dark alleyways and car parks i started asking random strangers if they spoke english but there were only middle-aged men walking around alone one guy didn't speak english but gave me a cuddle and took me back to his house around the corner at this point i'm crying my eyes out and just appreciated the help and kindness when i got to his house it turned out he had a family and the son was learning english in school he got out his school workbook and asked me my name then they took me to the police station my parents picked me up about 10 minutes later as they were driving around in a police car that man could have been anyone and i could have been kidnapped and never seen again not your ordinary bullet dodge seriously when you said cuddle i was scared for you on temp job i'd made several hours of corrections on a long document saving version after version when finished i deleted all the extra copies and emptied the trash only to realize the one copy i saved was the untouched original it was a busy office but as my heart sank someone announced everyone stop what you're doing we just lost funding on the project you'll be paid through the day but you're free to go never empty the trash you are a sibling sir by deleting all those files you completed the spell that caused the project to be cancelled not me but an old friend perhaps 15 years ago he dated a girl for a year or so she was totally out of his league they plan to get married and all that but he broke it off after she went downhill in the mental department a few years back her and her husband murdered their children and killed themselves when i was about 23 i was asked on a date by a brazilian girl who was maybe early 30s we went on a date but it wasn't the most interesting evening we didn't really click in the language barrier meant we couldn't really get past basic conversation i was a little resistant to go on a second date and felt it was fair game to say sorry i didn't think we clicked next time i saw her in person though i was berated with a bunch of insults hurled as she claimed we were supposed to get married and have kids and that i was the one very glad i was able to back away slowly and dodge that bullet back in the day read dial up internet and expensive desktops i downloaded a malware which asked for credit card details i was young and didn't have a card so contemplated nicking my dads and putting in the details i didn't want to get into trouble thing was the malware was asking for payment in rubles at that time i had no idea what that was was it a different currency some other adults speak so i came clean to my parents and they sorted the rest they also deleted my lemur i assume your parents created you aren't allowed to download anything off the internet rule after that going into our second year of university a group of us were looking for houses together we'd found one we liked and was sitting down with the estate agent to sign the paperwork out of nowhere one of the group started hysterically crying and ran out of the room shouting i can't live there it's got mildew and i'm allergic we didn't end up living with her but the people who did had a year of her brazenly stealing their phones money clothes and boyfriends bullet dodged senior in high school and a pair of twin girls with obvious behavioral issues got pretty aggressive with me to freak them both they lived a block away so we rode the same school bus i was getting a weird vibe and definitely had a this is too good to be true feeling from it every day on the bus ride home from school they tried to convince me to come over to their place they were super trashy white chubby girls and i just didn't know how to handle it so i basically avoided them until i got a car and started driving home instead of using the bus eventually after a month or so of stupid flirting and stalking one of them got one of the other kids on the bus to hook up with them he got them both pregnant one with twins they lied and said they were on the pill both of them wanted him to marry them and it got really bitter and nasty between the two girls parents kicked them out he was black and their parents weren't very happy and then the dude had to bail on his college plans to support three kids and pay two women for child support at 18. they all got heavy into oxy and are in and out of jail you didn't dodge a bullet you dodged a firing squad if you are new to the channel you can subscribe i publish new videos every day until then check another video bye for now

Channel: AskReddit Is Fun

Views: 117,201

Rating: 4.9360313 out of 5

Keywords: #updootst, updoot, updoot reddit, updoot everything, reddit on tap, toadfilms, pewdiepie, emkay, reddit, askreddit, funny reddit, reddit stories, top posts, reddit top posts, reddit cringe, comedy, reddit compilation, /r, r/, r/askreddit, top posts of r/, askreddit reading, best reddit posts, top posts of all time, people of reddit, askreddit question, ask reddit, subreddit, sub, askreddit school, r/askreddit how to, bodged bullet, bullet dodge, gettin gaway, barely, barely got away

Id: 83vXwDIkEJY

Length: 24min 0sec (1440 seconds)

Published: Tue Jul 14 2020