What Is Your "ARE YOU SERIOUS?" Customer Moment (Retail Stories r/AskReddit)

redditors who worked in retail what has to be the most a you serious moment ever so I used to work in H&M located on Fifth Avenue I see so as you can imagine we will get buttholes from all over the world one day I hear over our radio a frantic call for the porter to come to the ladies fitting room turns out a woman decided to take a crap in the fitting room and use some shirts to wipe herself the real are you serious moment was that she continued shopping through the store casually she was asserting dominance I worked at Walmart a woman came in to return a bag of soil because the bag was dirty she was dead serious I worked at a fast food place for a while and had this one regular who always had something to complain about the worst was that no matter what our fries were never fresh whenever we saw how we dropped fresh flies just so she wouldn't complain about them she'd order and we'd give her fries directly from the fryer and she'd tell us they weren't fresh what the Freak my manager got them from her walked to the back and brought her the exact same container and apologized the lady said these are perfect and went about her day I worked in an old Navy for quite a few years we weren't particularly known for our thorough loss prevention so some people had gotten quite comfortable openly stealing in front of employees eventually loss prevention turned over to new management and kicked into overdrive they had squads of people who would team up in stores to attempt to catch a few people so the word would spread and we see a few less shoplifters they were running this operation at a store in a low-income area when suddenly a Caucasian lady in her mid 50s came in and started shoving random things in her purse with little regard to her surroundings shoes and tops hanging half way out of her purse when she tried to leave loss prevention stopped her at the door and informed her that they had notified the police and she needed to remain there until they arrived she immediately said I have to go to the bathroom and as they tried to tell her that wasn't an option she started screaming I'm pooping and crap herself they escorted her to the bathroom since it's a single room without windows and she has no chance to escape they figured this would be an opportunity for her to clean herself up and this was mostly for the police so they wouldn't have to have to soak the car in Bleach afterwards after the police arrived they realized she had been in the room for a while and Weldon to respond or unlock the door management opened the door with a key and found the woman covered in her own crap which she has also rubbed all over the walls ceiling and floor people are freaking nuts I've got a million stories guy walks into tractor supply steals bolt cutters off of the shelf then walks to the side door and cuts the lock where two of his buddies have been placing items near the door they pile everything in this tiny car and just drive off they were caught later that day for trying to steal for another store in the same Plaza my favorite thing about that is that they even stole the tools for the crime during the crime say what you want about them but that is some efficiency watched a man carrying six bottles of red wine simply drop all six bottles on the ground shattering them and walk out of the store car keys stained bright red like a savage business-casual warlord my assumption was that it was an accident and he was horribly embarrassed in just left I'd like to believe that it was an intentional piece of performance art because it was the most beautiful thing I have ever witnessed I hear excuse me and look up from stock in the milk which I'm standing in front of could you tell me where your milk is I almost didn't answer her milk is basically the whole island I had it in my hands she wanted your milk I was once berated over 10 minutes becau sir of the fat content of ham a lady was adamant that ham never had fat when I was a kid and wanted to know when they started adding all the fat into ham I can't eat anything anymore she must have said that like 15 times I was like lady they really only taught me how to slice it I worked at McDonald's when I was 16 17 my first day in the grill area training during lunch rush this guy comes in through drive-thru and orders 100 burgers 50 plain 50 with cheese I was like WTF man I was told it was a lunch truck guy that would order them at the time we had a 49 cent burger and 59 cent cheeseburger day then dress them out and sell them for like two to three bucks apiece to his customers this is the guy that would be talked about in math class I worked at Sears and watched this guy with big brass bulls workin wave pick up a TV we had overstock in spider wraps out on the floor and walk back out alarm didn't even go off I worked at a store as a pharmacy tech and it was very slow people would often come up to me and ask if I knew where non pharmacy crap was and I always just pointed them towards customer service one day this very old woman had to be 85 plus with a strong southern accent comes up to the counter hello mom how can I help you today where's the collegian I think ah a skincare product perhaps maybe the health section so I walk out to the aisles and start looking with her Gilligan well I don't think we carry pure collagen are you looking for a skin care product or supplement she just stares at me looks up and down the aisle at all the lotions then back at me collagen where's the collagen she repeats at this point I'm getting quite frustrated I'm rummaging through these shelves of creams and lotions and coming up with nothing so I walk over to the pharmacists and consult with him he recommends sending her to customer service but I decide to push through keep in mind it's been about 10 minutes I walk back over to her and start scouring the vitamin supplement section and finally locate some kind of powdered collagen aha here we go I announce as I hand her the bottle she looks at the bottle then at me and says where's the collagen I'm Markin soup freakin collagen broth so I work up David's Bridal and recently we have had the kookiest of the cookie come into the store this story happened while I was at work but it was mainly with my manager a few weeks ago a mom and a dad came in looking for a post-wedding preservation kit for their daughter's gown my manager rings them up for the preservation kit and starts getting the dress ready to box when the dad mentions that a pin had been left in the him after alterations we do waltz in store and it nicked the bride on the wedding day that is an honest mistake that happens every once in a blue moon so my manager apologizes then out of nowhere the mom starts bawling I'm talking soap opera throw yourself on the ground bawling so of course everyone in the store is staring at this woman once she has everyone's attention she yells what if my daughter has the AIDS I don't know what kind of people you have working in the back what are you going to do for us if she's infected all while crying her eyes out my manager responded with mom I'm not a medical professional but I'm pretty sure that aids is not able to live outside the body this goes back and forth for about 15 minutes until finally the mom throws her hands up in the air and just says we will be in touch and she walks out after she left my manager went and hunted down her alterations ticket and honey never got her ham done the only thing she had done was adding bra cops into the dress we never heard from the mom again woman bought a shed I asked her her loading bay number and she said she hadn't driven asked her if she needed the number of a man with a van or something she said her husband could carry it I stared at her and said very slowly madam it is a building she insisted that I was being ridiculous and demanded we bring it up sell her middle age slightly chubby husband could carry it out the store as they only lived about 10 minutes walk away we brought it up with extreme difficulty and she asked me what's that thing I said that's your shed madam there's no way Jeff is carrying that oddly she decided to pay the money to have it a liver I worked in a supermarket for about a year and a half I've had some crackers the best one by far was a man walking up to me and demanding I show him fruit I asked him what specific kind of fruit as they are stored in different parts of the store and he just replied with fruit so I take him to the part of the store where most of the fruit is kept and asked him if that was going to be ok he then asked me for fruit in bags I explained that he can put the fruit into the fruit bags to take to the tail he then decides that none of this fruit is the fruit he is looking for after what felt like weeks of trying to coax what fruit he was looking for out of him walking him up and down the fruit and vege aisles three different managers had to get involved after he started yelling at me because I didn't know where the fruit was he cast his all out and walked away 20 minutes later he comes marching up to me shoves the bag of raisins in my face screams fruit and walks away I didn't work there but was behind this woman and line at my tiny towns dollar store type place she was buying a couple cans of that milk supply meant for kittens thought it was actual cat milk and was buying it to drink herself in some sort of fancy food party for one she was throwing for herself yet I done went to Kroger's and got me some fancy cheese and crap I had to leave the line because I was on the verge of bursting into laughter at a look on the cashy's face Garson please bring me the finest cat milk you have I work overnight stock at Walmart one night I'm over stocking the spam section and this big guy walks up big big I'm talking 300 400 pounds big I continued minding my own business putting things on the shelves and he speaks excuse me sir I am so so sorry that you have to see this and then he just pauses confused and concerned on equal levels I stand up and turn around to look at him wondering what exactly he plans on doing after staring at me for about a good 20 seconds no exaggeration he reaches over and in grabs a ton of spam more containers of spam than I ever thought anybody should ever need in their life to let alone one shopping trip that one is an exaggeration sue me with his cut fully loaded with spam he turns around and walks away leaving a huge empty spot on the shelves that I'd been filling up I managed to get out a quick have a nice day before he escaped to around the corner it was certainly an experience not quite retail but I used to work valet at a popular hotel there is a prestigious theater across the street and sometimes people from the show concert would valet with us we hated this because they all came and left at the same time and never tipped this particular night was a Rick Ross concert every car that came in for the concert smelled like weed and had a bottle of Rose or patron when the concert ended we had a rush of cars there was a short white dude with dreads who was waiting a while I asked him if he already gave his ticket to someone and he said he lost it he spoke entirely in slang his eyes were red as crap and he was fricked up I kind of remembered when he came in and asked him if he drove a black Escalade he said no it was white I poured through the logs and only saw three Escalades all black I asked him again and he said it was white he started panicking asking if we lost his car I reassured him we would find it he started crying he went to the hotel manager and told them the situation while I told the manager I had it under control the guy called the cops I had three guys run through the two garages we used no white Escalades at some point the guy found his ticket it was a freakin black Escalade when his car came he tipped $1 and left before the cops came his buddy drove my manager called me and I explained the situation to him the real ballsy move for the dreaded Frick was when he called my boss the next day he said we stole his wife's laptop my boss told him to freak himself one of my co-workers wanted to give the cops the car info and tell them they were likely impaired a guy came in who I have never encountered in my life served him and all was well three hours after my shift a notification pops up on my phone this guy had found my Instagram and my snapchat and added me what's creepy is the only thing he knew about me my first name that was it also I only recently moved to the area and no nobody here creeped me out for sure I work at Macy's in the women's shoes department and our customer base mainly buys clearance items and rarely spends more than $40 every day i watch as customer after customer asks if they can use coupons get an extra percent off of the price or any discount possible now one customer took the cake over every other one she came to me and asked for the mate 2:18 clearance shoes as I work off Commission and this was a pretty large sale I basically ran around the stockroom to gather these shoes I brought them all out neatly stacked in their boxes and rang them up at the register for her and her total came to 236 dollars this is where crap went south she asked if she could use her twenty percent off coupon now normally hey Kiera you can use that coupon but in this day we were having a sale all clearance shoes were markdown 80% and were roughly $10 20 per pair so coupons were prohibited she then screamed at me until I called my manager like calling me every name in the book telling me I'm a freaking idiot that I shouldn't be allowed to work there because I must be [ __ ] everything my manager finally came and when she explained that coupons weren't allowed for this particular sale the woman bought all 18 pairs for 236 dollars but made someone else ring it up so I wouldn't make Commission on the sale little did she know the other salesperson rang it up using my number dumb be a lady asked me where are the eggs she was literally looking at me and they were directly behind me obviously two shelves widened with a sign hanging from the side of the shelf that said eggs she wanted your eggs one time before HGTV and flat TVs but still since cable-ready TVs a lady came into Walmart with a huge floor model console TV the kind that had no remote and wanted to return it and get her money back she started yelling at me when I told her I wasn't accepting the return as she had no receipt and the TV was obviously over 15 years old and she demanded to speak with a manager so I paid the manager who told basically the same thing she then started the landing to speak with Sam we were like some who Sam Walton your boss she screams my manager had about enough of this lady's BS and told her well mom we have a wide selection of shovels in lawn and garden so you can go dig him up definitely the time when I was moaned at by a customer for not being on a very obviously unmanned checkout despite there being a very obvious long line because I was very obviously on the phone for an ambulance for a customer who had very obviously collapsed and was now very obviously bleeding to death you'd be surprised how many women would rather sleep here or stake into their purses pants than pay whatever sale price they are going for and this isn't the upscale supermarket as well I used to work at a grocery store as a bagger this guy said he wanted his milk in a bag and he has a lot of stuff so when I finally got around to the milk cause prioritising and all that jazz I wanted to confirm that's what he said it just slipped my mind so I asked again he proceeded to yell so loud that the next two lanes got quiet and they were all staring at what was going on are you freaking stupid you have hearing problems where is your manager they should fire you for being so stupid I already said I wanted it in the bag for Frick sake I just want to make people happy of course the butthole manager was working that day so he didn't say a word even though he watched it go down I at least had the sympathy of the checkers from the other two lanes worked at a target and have literally a thousand stories but the one that sticks out to me was one I wasn't actually present for gentlemen walked in one day with a blender sat down in our Starbucks and proceeded to make himself a smoothie I can't emphasize enough fact this is retail this is hardly the weirdest thing that's ever happened to us but the floor leader on duty asked if he needs anything is looking for anything he smiles and says no thank you very polite when he's finished he takes the blender goes into the bathroom and proceeds to pour the smoothie onto his head and begin to shave in a target bathroom which admittedly are already a little akin to the twice zone the Australia on the world map of target if you will anyway a male employee was sent in to ask what exactly he was doing and apparently the man replied with what it's not like I'm doing anything illegal what are you going to do call the cops yes apparently I guess several other male employees were called up to guard the door before anyone else could get in before police arrived don't know exactly what happened to the guy but I'm glad he's getting use out of his blender I worked at a bakery counter in a grocery store lady asks me about a cake that has fresh raspberries on top I tell her it's a white cake raspberry filling and fresh raspberries she thinks about it and then asks does it taste like cherries after looking at her and trying not to say oh nothing rude for a good solid minute I managed to say no and I walked away into the back oh no I teased the very scary pancake man comment him not scared to make him go away if you are new to the channel you can subscribe I publish new videos every day until then check another video or don't either way have a great day you magnificent people [Music]

Channel: Updoot Everything

Views: 58,165

Rating: 4.9001784 out of 5

Keywords: #updootst, updoot, reddit, r/askreddit, askreddit, ask reddit, r/, \r, r\, best of reddit, reddit stories, reddit story, top posts, funniest posts, funny, funny posts, funny reddit stories, funny askreddit, reddit funny, askreddit funny, askreddit stories, reddit stories 2019, people of reddit, sub, reddit cringe, memes, toadfilms, updoot everything, updoot reddit, story, stories, rslash, comedy, fresh, tales from retail, people share, askreddit walmart, askreddit retail stories

Id: NYthHTKCRnM

Length: 18min 18sec (1098 seconds)

Published: Fri Oct 25 2019