What Is Sex Like for Straight Men? | Sex Ed

all right are you afraid to do butt stuff [Applause] [Music] [Music] how often do you actually think about sex i would say i think about it like a couple times a day once you've had sex it just naturally crosses your mind i think not like consistently but like it'll pop in when i was a virgin every single hour of every single day after that maybe once a day when did you lose your virginity how was it i actually lost it in october of 2020. it was not the way i imagined it because i come from religious family i'm like i'm gonna wait until i get married no it was like a late night a snap call i actually lost it pretty early around 14 and it was by far not the best experience i'll admit like it wasn't the best obviously i didn't know what the hell i was doing i thought it was great it wasn't like how you would think like porn is yet it was still good though for a long time i actually thought that i had really really young onset erectile dysfunction i had like incredible anxiety when it came to sex and so every time there was an opportunity to have sex it just my body was not on the same page there was actually one person in particular who i'll never forget but she was like laying on this bed and she was like wow you have a naked woman in front of you and you and you can't get hard you know there was just a flood of like all like the feelings of like inadequacy and all that i had been thinking was going to happen negatively in my sex life did happen in that moment do you get emotionally attached to girls you have sex with for me it's based more on the relationship that was built as opposed to how much sex we're having it's hard for me to have sex without emotion and i find myself like missing that person after i was like a late bloomer like nothing in high school and then like after high school and in the college then like girl started paying attention to me so i was like i could care less about being emotionally attached it was like any girl that i was mostly attracted to i was like great awesome you know you maybe kind of suck as a person but like oh well like we'll figure that out later i'm just happy to be here how much do you understand the female anatomy down there can you name all the parts right now down there isn't it just one thing i'm not a scientist or a major in anatomy i shouldn't even try this vagina good start okay okay i literally it's just the vagina right that's it so i know the clitoris well the [ __ ] right i know what the clitoris is something major into something minor labia i don't think lips are i don't think that's the real name yeah this is this could be dumb but urethra oh and the hood right i think i read that somewhere vulva that is it i mean how much stuff could there be down there how did i do cool i'm gonna watch youtube videos after this now and just can you describe how it feels to ejaculate does it feel like peeing i would say the only time it feels like peeing is like when you're holding it for a really long time and like you're trying to get to the bathroom and then finally you're just like oh i don't know it's like a build up and then it just like it's like a wave that just you know but after you look you feel gross like most of the time i've like heard it from like most guys like once i know like i feel gross do you care if a girl is fully shaved down there i don't think it's like my place necessarily to be like you know what actually can you change this for me like i feel like that's kind of weird i'm a big fan of just vaginas in general however they're packaged i'm with it i do prefer cleanly shaved but either way is fine yeah as long as they're hygienic for sure do you care if your partner doesn't finish yes everyone should care oh my goodness ah this double standard frustrates me to no end i feel guilty if i don't when it comes to sex a large portion of that pleasure comes from seeing the other person's pleasure if i am with them and i'm like dating them like yes actually like it's the first thing at my list like she has to finish if it's like a little hookup like i don't it's amazing i don't care like i was more worried about myself i'm not gonna lie i am like selfish as soon as it comes to like hookups when i'm dating you like i'm making sure that's all i really really like care about when i was in my my long-term serious relationship i don't think she ever got an orgasm at least for me so later in the relationship i was just trying so hard i was reading up on a lot of stuff uh just to see like what can i do to make this happen and it just never happened but it's a huge hit to the ego like oh man i wonder what that feels like just because i've never i mean i've never experienced that to be quite honest have you ever questioned your sexuality absolutely 100 for a long time people were like oh yeah they would assume that i was gay et cetera and for a while i just hated that assumption but eventually i decided to take the time to feel like hey you know maybe what if this is the case um and i think i did my due diligence and like trying to be honest with myself and recognize what was and was not interesting to me and as such i think i came to a definitive conclusion i'm definitely team vagina for sure i knew very early on that i liked that i liked women i i had my first girlfriend when i well my first girlfriend when i was in in first grade i had my first kiss with a girl when i was in third yeah no i was it's never something i questioned yeah i uh i grew up in a mexican household so um so latinos uh they're very be manly and be this and be that and you know like anything that doesn't involve whatever typical man is whatever that means um they were just like no none of that i've kissed a man or two um i think that's maybe the extent of experimentation um have i thought about it maybe once or twice i lived in the midwest for all my life and everybody over there is pretty conservative so growing up in that i was just known to like women for the most part it was a passing thought at one point i did think about it especially after moving from home but then i wouldn't feel that genuine connection with another man so i wouldn't act on it have you ever been self-conscious about your penis size um no short answer so the straight answer is yes because there's an unfortunate stereotype with people of my ethnicity that goes around not saying that it's true or false but with that stereotype it gets to your head just a little bit because i mean you don't know if it's true or false especially like when i see myself naked and just like okay is this normal is this not normal i don't know especially as a black male you know there are a lot of expectations that are very very very very lofty you expect to have like a very large penis and you realize that you don't have a very large penis and so for a long time i think what was what my a lot of my anxiety was rooted in was me being a disappointment um and not meeting those expectations in real time it's something that that gets a lot of focus when you go to the store or like and you buy a pack of of like boxers or something you're gonna see a guy who's ripped and he's packing like 10 to 12 down there you know and it's like what the hell like is that what we're supposed to look like when you enter like middle school you start to watch porn and like you see these guys that like in the scenes and they're like and then it just makes you think like well i can't compete with that look at me are you afraid to drop to try butt stuff yeah i don't want anyone coming near my butt what i think if i were the receiver yeah i'd be afraid and i i think i'd be afraid to even to even be the giver i don't know i've heard some horror stories i don't know i'm a little nervous i've yeah i'm a little nervous but like i think i got to try it at some point i'm open to it kinda i'd say if i walked down this door and there was the opportunity to get pegged i probably would decline like and i don't i don't even know if i could say why because i don't i know i'm not gay it's not a question of like my sexuality i wouldn't say afraid i could be talked into it there you go i could be talked into in the right place in the right time i could say yes i ran into that topic one time and just to you know avoid double standards i gave it a try and not for me oh my god i did try it and i didn't like it it was it was actually the first time i had sex i see your finger like going and then i was like tried it didn't like it but if you're into that okay that's okay all right how do you define consent how i define consent is kind of both parties agreeing to do something that they both feel comfortable with i usually like to ask are you comfortable with this are you comfortable with this and if it's yes it's all along the way great if somewhere in there i'm not comfortable with like some safe word like banana or something then it's just like an instant stop consent is an unequivocal desire at a given moment to engage in any specified activity with another person and that includes sex or things that are not sex partners no no i haven't what the heck i wish that were a thing that'd be dope no it's usually me that has to have to do their asking and that's okay yeah and when they did like i was kind of like shocked i was like oh wow that's like you actually care i was like yes like i do want to have sex great like thanks for asking have you ever pressured someone to sleep with you do you regret it absolutely not and i would regret it yes i've never done that that feels horrible so no i've never done that you know sex just isn't worth that to me and that's something that that the other person would have to carry with them for the rest of their lives and and that's something that i'd have to carry with the rest of my life it was like me and my girlfriend and you know i was in the mood and she wasn't so maybe i was trying to sweet talk her a little bit like hey come on just you know that if anything never to someone never to a stranger never to anyone that i was just acquaintances with it was more like a serious girlfriend or someone that i was really comfortable with for sure yeah i would say have um when i was younger yeah i regret it you know because now the way that i look at sex is it's something special and you shouldn't be going around and sleeping with everybody um it should it should be with someone that's special to you and if you ever have to convince someone to have sex with you then it's not worth it i definitely felt pressured from my friends but i take responsibility for my actions you know like i am in control of my body and it was my making so have you ever done anything sexually yes yes i um i thought i made it pretty clear to her you know no i'm i don't want to do i don't want to do this you know get off of me so yes i'll answer that bluntly have you ever felt pressured by peers to lose your virginity or have a sexual interaction yeah more like pressure with like the world and culture because sex is such a big thing especially for like young guys i was in a fraternity in college coming into my pledge semester i was the only virgin in the fraternity it was almost like an event every friday saturday every time we had a party it was all i could think about like i couldn't even think about school most of the time just because all i was thinking about was like i don't want to have this label anymore i was sick of it just the stigma of being a virgin is like this we shouldn't feel bad for being a virgin honestly if i want to be completely honest i find myself doing it bro you better have like sex with her or else like you're just a like a freaking like loser bro and that's like okay but like what if i actually like the girl and like i don't really want to have sex yet like i might have feelings for like i don't want to take it that fast yet it'll happen like relax we know you're horny just it's fine it'll happen when it's going to happen and don't put a lot of pressure on yourself it's different for everybody and you should take the time to understand yourself and be honest with yourself at the end of the day [Music] you

Channel: Jubilee

Views: 1,996,131

Rating: 4.9622808 out of 5

Keywords: jubilee, jubilee media, jubilee project, middle ground, spectrum, odd man out, versus 1, embrace empathy, live deeper, love language, blind devotion, jubilee sex ed, sex education, straight men answer questions about sex

Id: HAMQfXMkoKw

Length: 13min 29sec (809 seconds)

Published: Wed Feb 24 2021

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[u/Phoenix__Rising2018]

"the hole. Duh! What else is there?"

New rule. If he can't name the labia majora, minora, clitoris, vagina and say the word vulva then he ain't getting to visit mine.

[u/SeaNegotiation8]

A whole generation of men and boys raised on porn, and most of them STILL can’t even find the clitoris.

And the clit is literally so obvious and reliable in its appearance and placement that, clinically speaking, it’s considered an anatomical landmark!

Male lurkers, if you can’t find the clit, you ain’t shit.

[u/Platipus6]

"Have you ever pressured someone into having sex"

"I felt comfortable pressuring my LTR :)"

holy. fucking. shit.

[u/[deleted]]

The one guy who said he doesn’t care if the girl he hooks up with doesn’t orgasm 🤡

[u/Throwawayrightaway28]

...That is one of the most disturbing things I’ve ever seen. From the guy saying he lost his virginity at 14 to the ones saying they were watching porn since middle school to the guy talking about pressuring his gf for sex, the whole thing was just society in a nutshell. The really scary thing was these were the ones being PC. Like the other guys were quite obviously lying about some of their answers, trying to make things sound better. And that tall guy who said he had pressured women into sex and he now felt bad about it. I notice he wasn’t in nearly as many segments as the other guys, I wonder if it’s because his answers weren’t the kind they could broadcast.

[u/fierce_and_mighty]

No, it is not just called the vagina and no, it is not one whole “thing”. If you don’t care to concern yourself with knowing AT MINIMUM, the correct terminology and placement of female parts, you are never getting the privilege of being near enough to see✨mine✨

[u/RikaRikaw]

Or... hear me out... Ask her to explain to you what she likes and how she likes...and then...GASP FOLLOW IT THE WAY SHE DESCRIBED TO YOU so tired of guys not doing CLEAR AND EASY instructions well because they think they can do better (or are following what they learned from porn)

[u/[deleted]]

Sigh. Proving what we already know.