Turning Your Anger Into an Asset

so i want to go into the word of the lord and my contribution right now to this series uh i want to talk about turning your anger into an asset turning your anger into an asset father today i thank you for every person that's watching i thank you for every single person every married person i thank you for every son for every daughter i thank you for the people that have accidentally stumbled up uh on on our uh platform our social media platform today and i thank you god that there is a word that is in season that's going to make us better god have your way and speak through me speak through your word prepare our hearts to receive what you have to say and we'll give you the glory for it in jesus name amen and a man if y'all are standing for the reading of god's word you may be seated today i want to talk to you about turning anger into an asset now if you watched and you tuned in last week i talked to you about our hope being on high alert and i used james 5 and 8 and i really want to go back to that same book for this first message in our relationship series because that particular book in the book of james it was written to encourage people uh who were under extreme amounts of stress and extreme amounts of pressure uh and it was all because of the crisis that they were actually trying to live through and whoever you are and wherever you might be watching me from today if you are a human being and you are under stress then i can pretty much guarantee that your relationships are probably under a little stress as well and though james is a is a very short five uh chapters in 108 verses all together from beginning to end it is packed with tons of insight that we can gather and glean from and it will be able to help us i believe right here right now in the situations that we are facing today as a result of the pandemic that we are living through there are a lot of people that are dealing with anger americans in general they are dealing with uh a lot of anger and they're angry for a whole lot of reasons i i really kind of experienced a little bit of that firsthand this week because uh i actually was trying to text rose and rose's number came up and rose's face came up and i text her and when i hit send all of a sudden there was this crazy message that came back to me and i just kind of you know i just put my little uh emoji up where your eyes are like because it was uh it was not a nice message and i know rose and rose is always nice and so uh you know as i as i i sent that little emoji back to her all of a sudden here it's like somebody unleashed the worst cussing out you ever got in your life and i was i was the recipient of that and so at that point i just picked up the phone i'm like we ain't texting no more i'm getting ready to find out what's wrong with you and uh even though i knew it wasn't her but i don't know how the wires all got crossed but uh i realized that this person that i had just sent this little text to about hey do you want me to bring home some macaroni and cheese to go with the pork chops uh i i realized wow they're angry they were either angry or hungry or something but um there was a whole lot of anger going on and it was coming back to me people are angry today they're angry for a whole lot of reasons as a matter of fact in an article that i read this past week um from the washington post it was actually an older article but the the writer said made a statement and i thought it was worth jotting down he said americans are living in a big anger incubator americans are living in a big anger incubator um so for many reasons we're dealing with the pandemic we have a civil unrest like we have not seen in america in decades people are dealing with financial fallouts they're dealing with losing jobs and losing homes and uh losing all kinds of of things they're losing loved ones they're they're losing hope and and there's a whole lot of things going on there are there are uh things um that are happening in our nation that we have not uh experienced in a long long time and people people are frustrated people are dissatisfied people are disgruntled bottom line is people are angry and you don't have to do anything to get them that way people are already there they're angry at public officials they're angry at those that we have elected in in offices they're angry um at our our nation's covet response uh team they're angry because they feel like we could have not had to go through this or we uh could have done better over here and it's easy for us to say those things when we are not the ones that are actually having to do the job but uh i do i i i you know all of that has made people angry there are some people are angry at the shutdown other people are angry because they feel like it was a political reason that we opened up uh too soon there there's all kinds of stuff people feel like their rights are being threatened people are are are feeling like uh uh we're invading uh or that that the the government is invading their space by telling them that they should wear a mask and then other people are angry because i got a mask on and you don't got a mask on and how come and i mean it's just one thing after another people are angry at the uncertainty that we are feeling as we look toward our future and although anger is not inevitable unmanaged anger can become aggressive behavior toward other people and especially toward children which experts are are saying that children who are at home with abusive parents right now they are in increased danger um and and there are so many articles i i just i just read a bunch of articles there are many many articles and uh what i did was i just sat down and i googled the phrase anger and the pandemic which and they just kept coming up which tells me that uh people are feeling quite angry and so today if that's you um one of the good things about being at home is i if i ask you to raise your hand the rest of the church won't see you raise your hand but today if if you're a person that's struggling with anger i'm here to help okay i'm here to help you today i'm i'm your pastor and uh even if i'm just your pastor for today and and you kind of just stumbled onto to our uh a social media platform our website and you're watching i'm here in your life to help and i wanna i wanna help you number one i wanna help you understand where anger comes from and i also wanna give you some practical steps uh from the word of god that will enable you to reduce it in your life and in the life of other people now at this point in the pandemic this message is very important because we need to know that if you are feeling a little maybe um short tempered or if you're feeling a little bit irritable a little bit uh uh just not yourself and and and it in you're in this particular season dealing with the pandemic i want you to know that that there is a measure of that that is normal okay um there's a measure of that that is normal it's we are we're we have been through a very tumultuous year and so a lot of a lot of us can find ourselves rattled easy we can find ourselves uh almost quick to snap back and and to some degree that is normal um but there are because it really there are many reasons uh if you wanted to start naming them for for people to be angry uh when you combine the factors of being out of work when you add to that uh living a life of quarantine and when you add to that now you're having to be the teacher uh for your children and then you add to that not only am i the teacher but i'm still working from home and then you add to that all of the reports that come across the tv uh about things getting worse as opposed to things getting better and then when you pour into the mix of that uh the fact that we are in an election year like we have never been in in my lifetime it can cause us to have a lot of heated emotions and uh anger may be one of the most misunderstood and one of the most mismanaged emotions that we all have and and and the wrong kind of anger uh can can it can make you sick it is actually named in scripture as one of the seven deadly sins but i want to say to you today that not all anger is a sin sometimes the most appropriate response to a situation is anger the bible tells us that god himself knows what it is like to be angry he has experienced anger and so that's how you and i uh experience it as well we are we are made in his likeness and we are made in his image if he had never been angry then you and i wouldn't be able to feel what anger is like but but because he was angry then we know that there is a place for anger there but but let me say this there is such a thing that is called a sinful anger there is such a thing that is no uh called wrong anger or unrighteous anger and and and these are the types of anger that we must learn how to get a hold of because these types of anger if if we continue to allow them to go mismanaged then we're going to have a problem because mismanaged anger is a sin but managed anger can become an asset let me say it again mismanaged anger is a sin make no mistake about that but when you have managed anger that can actually become an asset the problem isn't the anger uh uh that that you're feeling as much as uh it is the inappropriate expression of the anger that we are feeling see typically we go to one or or two uh extremes uh or the other we i there are people that when they get angry they blow up i mean they blow up like like a balloon and then there are other people that when they find themselves angry they clam up so you got the ones who blow up and you got the others who clam up uh we either stew in our anger or we spew in our anger let me let me kind of give you a little example of that um when it comes to marriage most of the time uh it it it is uh if you compared it to animals uh uh uh turtles usually end up marrying skunks okay turtles end up marrying skunks and so in our marriages you got you've got one person who is a turtle then you've got the other person who is a skunk and when the turtle gets angry what does he do uh the turtle just crawls back into his shell and he just sits in his shell and he's angry but when the skunk gets angry they just stink up the whole place everybody knows that the skunk is angry so one stuffs it and the other one spews it and what needs to happen is anger because it's not going away it has got to be managed because when anger is managed it produces better marriages it produces better families it produces better friendships it produces better men better women better boys better girls it produces better business partners it produces better athletes it produces better leaders when it is managed we can all become better and ultimately it produces a better way for us to live our life so today i want you to write these down i'm going to give you six biblical principles that you can use to turn your anger into an asset are you all ready i want you to write them down if you want to take your anger and turn it in to an asset number one you have to calculate the cost of uncontrolled anger calculate the cost of uncontrolled anger because uncontrolled anger always has a hefty price tag attached to it and when you when you actually start counting the cost of your uncontrolled anger it will cause you not to be so quick to just let your anger be uncontrolled because the last time that your anger got out of control you paid a price for it and so it is important that before we allow our anger to get out of control that we start counting up the cost because uncontrolled anger is uh something that is very expensive write this down proverbs 29 and verse 22 says that a hot tempered man or woman gets into all kinds of trouble a hot-tempered man gets into all kinds of trouble what what do you mean by all kinds of trouble well proverbs 15 and 18 says it like this hot tempers cause arguments so we're looking at arguments because we're hot tempered proverbs 14 and 29 says that anger causes mistakes proverbs 14 i know i'm giving you a lot today but proverbs 14 and 17 says that people with hot tempers do foolish things so here we are that we we in those few scriptures right there we've just summed up that if when you are hot tempered you will have trouble you will have arguments you will have mistakes and you will do foolish things so can i can i tell you today that whenever you lose your temper you lose i will say that again whenever you lose your temper whenever i lose my temper i ultimately end up losing what do we lose we lose the respect of other people we lose the respect of our children we lose the respect of our friends we lose the respect of our authorities and if we're not careful you can become so angry and so foolish that you ultimately end up losing self-respect and so you i've seen too many people lose jobs because of their anger you you're like okay well i just ain't gonna take that i'm gonna turn around and walk out of here today i didn't i ain't got to take that no but you want a paycheck and after about four or five jobs you need to pause and say okay lord teach me how to deal with my anger you could lose your job you could lose your home you can lose your status even you can even lose your health if you don't learn how to control your anger and and let me just give you this as a little bit of a nugget today let me say to those of you who are parents that are watching me when you are frustrated it's very tempting to motivate your kids through your anger i'm gonna say it again when you are frustrated it's very tempting to take your anger and try to motivate your kids with that anger why because what happens is that anger uh it it can work for you short term i said it can work for you short term anger has a way of getting people's attention resulting in in in a short-term pay-off but in the long run you we got to remember that anger in a parent creates three kinds of problems in children it creates number one if you have anger you end up creating anger in your children you also create apathy in your children and number three you create uh uh alienation in your children because they get to the point that you know they they're too smart to talk back to you but there's a whole lot of conversation that's going on in their head and and when they see you just blow up and go off in their head uh they're thinking you know what let me let me just do what they want let me get let me back up and the next thing you know there is a gulf between you and your child and you don't know how in the world that golf got there because of anger nothing destroys a relationship whether it's a husband a wife a friend a an employer whatever it is nothing destroys a relationship faster than anger that's why the bible says in proverbs 11 and 29 the full yes the fool who provokes his family to anger and resentment will finally have nothing worth while left let me read it again the fool who provokes his family to anger and resentment will finally have nothing worthwhile left at the end of the day if you continue to provoke your family if you continue to take advantage of your position in your family and you use it against your children or against your spouse at the end of the day you ain't gonna have nothing worthwhile so anything that you're gonna have you're gonna have to build if you're gonna have a good family you gotta build your family and you know where it starts it starts with us examining our self so we must calculate the cost of uncontrolled anger the second principle as it relates to moving your anger and turning your anger into an asset is this you have to make up your mind to manage it okay you have to make up your mind to manage that anger now when i'm saying uh you have to make up your mind what i'm actually saying is you and i have to make a deliberate decision we have to say to ourselves okay i'm tired of it i'm tired of hurting them i'm tired of hurting me and i am choosing this day for things to change in my life i am making up my mind that i'm gonna manage this and you know what quit saying that that you can't control your anger i'm gonna say that again quit saying that you can't control your anger because the truth of the matter is you can control your anger quit saying you can't and start realizing and saying that you can't stop making excuses for being angry and start accepting responsibility for your reactions in those times where your anger begins to rile up you don't have to go there i'm gonna say it again you don't have to go there nobody is holding a gun to your head saying come on i want you to get angry no if you're angry and you're loud and you're tearing up everything you know what it's because you chose to be angry the fact is that you have much more control over your anger than you want to admit i said you have much more control over your anger than you want to admit okay for instance have you ever been in your house and you're in an argument with somebody and you're saying let me tell you right now i ain't got to and all of a sudden the phone rings the phone rings let me tell you right now i ain't got to hello hello wait a minute what was that i'm glad you asked you chose to change your tone and you chose it and the reason that you were able to change it is because you decided to change it you made up your mind to manage your anger in that moment well if you can manage it in that moment then you have the same managing power that you could have used in the heat of all of that before the phone rang proverbs 29 and 11 says a full we're back to the full again a full gives full vent to his anger but a wise man keeps himself under control so what does that tell me that tells me that anger is controllable that tells me that anger is a choice and when you decide or when i decide to get angry that means we have chosen to get angry but when we make up our mind that we are going to resolve that anger which means that we are going to decide in advance against that anger then we can manage it and if we'll ask god he will help us manage our anger in that moment are y'all with me today i hope this is helping you uh the third write this down the third principle as it relates to turning your anger into an asset this is a good one right here you have to reflect before you react reflect before you react in other words think before you speak we've all been guilty of of speaking before we think but it would be wise if we would learn how to flip that thing and start thinking before we speak um when i'm talking about reflect before you you react i'm i'm saying uh don't respond impulsively what that means is sila have you ever been reading through the scripture and you'll see see law that means pause and just be quiet pause and think about it and this is where james really helps us because he says in james 1 19 and 20 he says understand this my brothers and sisters you must all be quick to listen slow to speak and slow to get angry so james is teaching us in in his book right here he's teaching us how to live as christians who are in a crisis and and and what he's actually saying here to us is that if you claim that god is your father and and you have his dna inside of you then there ought to be something about us that wants to act like god would act and so he's saying to us if you really believe like you say that you believe then there should be something that comes across in your behavior that resembles the father see your beliefs are what determine your behavior i said your belief what you really believe not what you just say you believe but what you really believe in your heart is what dictates your behavior so now when james talks to us right here he he does not what i like about james is he doesn't just give us a rule for conduct but he also gives us the reason for it okay he gives not just a rule how we should conduct ourselves but he gives us the reason as to why we should do it like he says do it and then in this particular case he is telling us listen i want you to be quick to listen i want you to be slow to speak and i want you to be slow to get angry well why does james say that because that is the way that god handles us let me say it again that is the way that god handles us god is slow to get angry at you he is slow to get angry at me and if we are genuine followers of christ then there ought to be something in us that models that same behavior and here is how you can do that and how you can model that and james gives us three action steps okay and and he's saying if you want to control your anger here's three action steps number one be quick to listen be quick to listen uh one of the best ways that you can defuse a person's anger is by listening to them okay one of the best ways if you ever find yourself in a situation where a person is exploding on you one of the best ways to help defuse their anger is to actually lean in and listen to them i did not say while they are talking you are trying to figure out in your head what you are going to say back to them when they stop talking no that's not what i said i i said the best way to defuse a person's anger is by calmly and genuinely listening to what they are saying because there is something about being heard just just knowing that you are being heard that calms whatever it is that's raging inside of you and and when you don't feel like you're being heard what ends up happening is you just become more and more angry listen when you are angry don't talk first just listen don't be quick to try to get your punches in don't be quick to try to get your jabs in don't be quick to try and prove your point don't be quick to try to share it well i want to share my side of the story that's not what the bible says the bible i'm helping somebody today the bible says be quick to listen listen so we got to start changing our behavior and and be quick to listen why does it say that because listening will calm people down listening will calm you down listening will calm me down listening has a way of soothing people's uh anxiety listening has a way of relieving people from their fears and and reducing their frustration and all of those things right there are a path toward a better conversation and so that's why we need to put these uh in action in our life so we need to reflect before we react and we can do that by being quick to listen and now here's number two another way we can do that is by being slow to speak slow to speak why does james say that we must be slow to speak because anger anger management or anger control is really often a matter of mouth control anger control is often a matter of mouth control and so you you you tame your temper by taming your tongue that's good you tame your temper by taming your tongue and being able to manage your anger starts with watching your words watching what you say we're quick to tell kids watch your mouth watch watch what you're saying but as we as we go on in our life and things provoke us we're often quick to speak and that's not what we're supposed to do according to the bible proverbs 29 and 11 says a stupid man gives a free reign to his anger this is this is uh another translation it says it gives free reign to his anger but a wise man waits and lets it grow cool so have you ever heard the phrase chill out well you didn't know that came from scripture did you a wise man lets his anger grow cool he's saying that delay can lead to diffusing your anger and and yes what he's saying to us is i need you to chill out you didn't know that chill out was biblical but but when we put time between us and uh uh the things that make us angry what ends up happening is that we tend to calm down a little bit so the first thing that james says to us is be quick to listen he says to us be slow to speak and the third thing he says to us is be slow to get angry so by doing number one and number two being quick to listen and slow to speak you can automatically do number three which is how when you're quick to listen when you're slow to speak you will automatically become slow to get angry james uses the word slow twice in these three action steps because he wants us to understand that we can stall and we can delay anger in our lives well what somebody says well what do i do while i'm delaying it here's what you do you analyze you think and you start you process it and you start thinking it through and you start trying to understand your anger and why you have become so angry proverbs 19 and 11 says that a man's wisdom gives him patience so the more understanding that you have the more patient that you will be i'm going to say it again the more understanding that you have the more patient that you will be so the more i understand my anger the more patient i will be with you and your anger the more i understand me and my anger the more i will understand my kids and their anger the more i understand my uh my my husband's anger the more i will understand my husband are you following me my the more i understand my child or the more i understand my friend or the more i understand my employer or my co-worker or my next-door neighbor the more the more i will understand them as as a person so so now uh while while you are delaying and while you're in that stage of oh i'm about to blow up but i'm doing my best not to while you're trying to hold back your anger what do i do you ask yourself three questions here they are i'm helping you today you ask yourself three questions number one why am i angry okay why am i angry number two what do i really want and number three how can i get what i want out of this situation blowing up and exploding on people rarely will be the way that you get what you want out of a situation so what do we have to do then we have to identify the root cause of our anger typically the root cause of the root causes of anger are hurt frustration and fear usually when you see somebody who's extremely angry it's because one of those three are the root cause to their anger hurt frustration or anger and we need to remember this that anger and insecurity often go together anger and insecurity often go together so the more insecure i feel the more angry i find myself feeling so so while you are being quick to listen and slow to speak and slow to become angry you might ought to insert a prayer in the middle there like like from psalms 141 and verse 3 that says lord help me control my tongue and help me to be careful what i say okay so sometimes you got to interject that prayer while you're waiting you're going to say lord i need you to help me because i'm trying to make an effort here not to go off on somebody so number one let's just do a little recap number one we the way we can move our anger uh and turn it into an asset is number one we calculate the cost of uncontrolled anger number two we make up our mind to manage it so stop saying that you can't because the truth of the matter is that you can number three don't react until you reflect so that that and how do you do that by being slow to speak i mean i'm sorry by being slow to quick to listen slow to speak and slow to become angry here's the fourth step this is the fourth step this is how you can turn your anger into an asset here's what we got to do release your anger appropriately release it appropriately see the problem we said this earlier the problem is not anger the problem is the unappropriate release of anger ephesians 4 and 26 says if you become angry don't let your anger lead you into sin if you become angry don't say we're quick to call other people out well yes he's they're whoremongers and they're you know that's an adulterer right there and and yep that's a liar right there but can i tell you that the bible says that anger can be a sin if we're not careful it can it's not necessarily a sin but it can lead us into sin so so there may be times that your anger that the anger that you deal with uh might be appropriate but it's how that we handle that anger that determines if it leads us into sin so what are you saying pastor brady i'm saying there's a right way and there's a wrong way to express our anger there's a helpful way and there is a harmful way don't express your anger in a way that that moves you further from the goal that you're aiming for if you're aiming for that goal don't allow your anger to move you further away from the goal but allow your anger to motivate you closer to the goal that you are aiming for you see our hurts can't be healed and our frustrations cannot be resolved and our fears will not be relieved and we will never get closer to the goal if we release our anger unappropriately so let me give you just a little nugget of truth right here it is a myth to think that once i release my anger i'm gonna feel better well i feel better now because i got that off my chest let me tell you something that's a myth that's a lie because research shows that anger produces more anger whenever you have anger it ends up ultimately producing more anger and aggressiveness produces more aggressiveness and outbursts lead to more outbursts because what you end up doing is you end up developing a habit and now it might have been just i'm angry for a moment and if you don't deal with that now you find yourself being aggressive to people and you find yourself just letting yourself have these outbursts and you end up now you've got a pattern going and you have developed a habit and that habit has got to be broken and you and i have the ability in the name of jesus to break that habit in our life proverbs 15 and 1 says this that a gentle answer quiets anger but a harsh one stirs it up a gentle anger has the way has the ability to quiet anger but a harsh one stirs it up have you ever noticed that the louder you speak when you're in a disagreement the more angry you become the louder that you talk the more angry you become well how's the best way then for me to deal with how i feel okay number one don't stuff it don't store it up don't suppress it and don't don't and don't repress it because when you repress it you are denying that the anger is there and when you do those things you potentially put yourself in a position that your body becomes sick because all of that stuff is built up in you and there is a word for repressed anger you know what it is depression do you know how many people in america and around the world are dealing with depression they're depressed because they've allowed themselves to repress anger don't express your anger inappropriate express it in an appropriate way because when you uh express it unappropriate it only ultimately makes you sick and makes you worse so what do you mean uh pastor brady ex don't express it in an unappropriate way don't expect uh express it in ways like sarcasm okay a lot of times speak people are sarcastic because they have a lot of repressed anger and so when they when it hits them uh they'll repress something but then something sarcastic comes out of their mind out of their mouth so when i hear people who are always sarcastic it tells me that you have got a lot of repressed anger going on in your life don't uh don't express it by uh throwing low blows okay low blows are for little people people that are always throwing low blows might try to make you think that they're big but the truth of the matter is they are very little don't express it by manipulating or or by attacking or by pouting yes yes that's the opposite extreme you might be angry and so now you're going to manipulate people with your attitude because now your pouty and you want everybody to ask you why and what's wrong with you and now all of a sudden i it's not my it it's my job to live my life and make myself happy but now i gotta make you happy because you walk around with a manipulative attitude that's pouting or you walk around with a bully attitude and none of these behaviors will get you to a better place the right way i'm going to give you the answer now the right way to deal with all of that anger that's going on in your spirit there is a right way you know what the right way is confess it don't repress it confess it admit it and just say so i'm angry and the reason i'm angry you you name the cause you put the call you name the calls right there the reason i'm angry is not just because i'm angry but i'm angry because i'm hurting i'm angry because i'm frustrated i'm angry because the truth of the matter is i'm really scared i'm really afraid you see when when you're angry at someone and you start expressing it uh uh unappropriately what happens is that person becomes defensive so if you're angry and you just kind of blow up on people then what's happening is that person immediately puts up their shield they put up their wall and they become defensive to everything that you say but if you say if you say instead of saying i'm angry at you and this is what i'm going to say and this is what if you look at them and say not i'm angry but i'm hurt then immediately people little by little start dropping their defenses because it's easier to deal with each other when you're hurt and when you're frustrated and when you're battling fear than it is to deal with one another's anger so the next thing that next time things go crazy don't just get angry just say wait wait let me tell you this this hurts me so i'm not just angry i'm i'm dealing with pain here and it causes the defense to go down now here this is very important here's the fifth one the fifth way to turn your anger into an asset is you have to re-pattern your mind this is very key here it's key to permanent long-term change okay and long-term change is what's necessary because people that are around you at some point they get tired of putting up walking around on eggshells every time they're around you so we need change we don't just need we don't just need you to say i'm sorry because we don't heard that hello we need permanent long-term change because that's how we build trust in our relationship if i think you're going to flinch at me every time you get upset then guess what i don't trust you anymore and eventually i don't want to be around you because you are high maintenance and i ain't got time for that i'm trying to live life too i'm trying to survive too so if you want to be angry and go off go somewhere else and do it but eventually people get tired of that and you end up losing something that's very important to you or someone that's very important to you why because you won't call yourself on the carpet [Music] if you want permanent long-term change you have to re-pattern your mind that means you got to learn to think in new ways the way you express your anger right now guess what that's a learned behavior hello the way you are expressing your anger right now you learn to do that somebody modeled that for you might have been your mother might have been your father but somebody modeled that behavior the good news is that if you learned it you can unlearn it we are new creatures in christ jesus so i'm going to unlearn that way of that that that behavior because that is not pleasing to god romans 12 and 2 tells us that we can do that he says don't copy the behavior and the customs of this world but let god transform you let god let his word let what i'm saying to you today let it transform you into a new person how by changing the way that you think so we have to re-pattern our mind so so so listen um you act angry this is important you act angry because you feel angry and you feel angry because you think angry thoughts let's put it in reverse i don't want to think angry thoughts anymore so therefore i don't feel angry and the reason and because i don't feel angry i don't have to act angry did y'all see that we're just flipping that around you and i have the ability to do that your thoughts are determined by your emotions and your emotions are what determines your actions so if you want to break that spirit of anger off of your life you have to recondition your mind you have to retrain yourself and you have to re-pattern the way you think and i just told you in romans 12 and 2 that you have the ability to do that and as you do that you have here's what is important you have to understand that anger is contagious i know that the coronavirus is contagious but i also know that anger is very contagious so if you are trying to deal with anger in your life guess what that means that means you have to stay away from people who are angry because proverbs 22 and 24 says keep away from angry short-tempered people or you will learn to be like them i will say it again keep away from angry short-tempered people or eventually you my brother you my sister will begin to act like those people that you are around that's why if your kids are hanging out with other kids who are angry you need to pull your child back and say you can't hang out with that person because they are angry all the time people in gangs you got angry from the north angry from the south angry from the east angry from the west and they're all in one place because anger is contagious and it infects the people and hear me parents kids learn from models kids learn from models anytime don't don't tune me out because i'm almost done anytime that you lose your temper you are modeling that behavior towards your kids you are teaching them to be angry and the shameful little secret in millions of homes today is that out of control anger is destroying our families that's a dirty little shameful secret but it's in millions of homes it's in some of the homes that my voice is going into right now over the last year one of the statistics says that 10 million 10 million children were severely beaten by parents who could not control their anger [Music] that'll stun you proverbs 11 29 says if you exploit or if you abuse your family you will end up with nothing but a fist full of air and when you grow old and you have no family because they have gotten big enough to walk away and leave you will die a lonely man you will die a lonely woman because when you have the ability to build infrastructure and raise up wonderful sons and daughters you did not deal with your own anger and now as a result you have nothing in your hand to help you get through the later stages of your life because you didn't build it colossians 3 19 says you husbands you must love your wives and never never treat them harshly if this is going on in your family it has to stop today [Music] do you hear me it has to stop today how do i do that pastor brady my final way to take your anger and turned it into an asset is to ask god to fill you with his love fill you not just halfway but ask him to fill every part of you every little hidden issue every little hurt every little frustration every big frustration everything that you have not dealt with yet in your life as god's love to just come in and fill up every area because if you want to change from being an angry person to a peaceful person if you want to change your anger and turn it into something that works for you and not against you here is the secret for that you have to say jesus come into my heart and fill every spot of me with your love because first corinthians 13 and 5 says love is not easily angered it's not easily angered so if i am filled to the brim with god's love almost nothing can make me upset but if i am filled with anger almost everything can make me upset romans 15 and 5 patience and encouragement come from god and i pray that god will help you all agree with each other the way that jesus christ wants see god his will for our life is for us to live in harmony it's for us to live in harmony so if you're a husband today and you're hearing me you need to make a fresh commitment to your wife to your family pull them together and say you know what we're gonna all make a fresh commitment in the middle of this pending to manage our anger in this crisis we're gonna take what is working for against us and by the help of god it's going to work for us how do we do that go to the root cause ask god for help yield to him by breaking old habits and then model that new behavior until everybody around you catches on you

Channel: Sheryl Brady

Views: 6,726

Rating: 4.9099097 out of 5

Keywords: Pastor Sheryl Brady, Sheryl Brady, The Potter's House of North Dallas

Id: Lcv7RENl1FM

Length: 59min 35sec (3575 seconds)

Published: Sun Nov 01 2020