Trump Tells Black People How Beloved He Is by Black People, Haley Loses SC & Cousin Micki Prank

thank you for watching thank you for joining us I've been hoping you will join us and well look at this you did how about that oh my gosh we have a I hate to interrupt but we have an abundance of stupidity to get to tonight it was a very productive weekend for our former president and when I say productive of course I mean not even the slightest bit productive but he did a lot of talking specifically Donald Trump was asked to show up at a Galla for the black conservative Federation where he was given the champion of Black America award which is already funny but um previous recipients of the champion of Black America award include no one they made it up specifically for him because when you think about the true champions of Black America you think Obama you think Dr King you think Rosa Parks anything of this man these lights are so bright in my eyes that I can't see too many people out there but uh I can only see the black ones I I can't see any white on you say that's how far I've come that's how far I've come that's a long that's a long way is it I don't know is it a long way I don't know maybe in terms of macular degeneration it's a long way right see now he used to be very racist now he can't even see white people that's how I can only see the black ones don't forget I'm up here now rapping to you guys for 45 minutes with without any notes cuz this stupid teleprompter wasn't working he's rapping yes is this was quite an event the whole time I was waiting for Borat to pop out from behind the curtain the notorious pig freestyled on a variety of topics all designed to let black people know how beloved he is by black people the black people are so much on my side now because they see what's happening to me happens to them I built a lot of buildings and I want to tell you a black worker is a great worker you've done an incredible job you know Carrie Grant he was this very handsome guy I'm going to put it more in this Sydney poer I thought he was very handsome right do we give it to Barry bons of bab Ruth huh Barry okay I'm with I'm with Barry hey especially tonight I'm with Barry I'm being indicted for you the black population you see black people walking around with my mug shot black people really like Trump my favorite color is black that is some Kung Fu pandering right there that is the best part of the whole thing and this is very difficult to find by the way because there were no shout shots of the crowd at this black conservative Gala they kept the camera tightly focused on the stage and I said please you got to find some video of the crowd and we did find some video of the crowd and now I think I know why they were focused on the stage because as you can see a lot of these black people are very white people I was working on what they call a solid hunch for that one and I think it's important to note that in 1989 Donald Trump took out a huge ad in the New York daily news demanding the death penalty for a group of mostly black teenagers who later turned out to have been wrongfully accused not only has he not ever apologized for that now he's like I'm just like you you want to buy my high tops this is your champion of Black America this is funny Trump owes the state of New York $450 million that's the funny part oh that is funny but that's beyond that he only has 30 days to come up with either the full amount or a bond for the full amount or the State Attorney General can seize his assets for every day he doesn't pay he owes another $114,000 in interest and the Attorney General Leticia James every day has been tweeting the increasing amount of money Trump owes to remind him of how much money he owes see there are trolls on both sides of the bridge on Saturday Trump won the South Carolina primary he beat Nikki Haley by 20 points and even though the result was no surprise it was um it was pretty much expected Trump showed up to celebrate along with the ever malleable South Carolina Senator Lindsey Graham who did not get a warm reception from the home crowd when I'm in trouble in the left I call up Lindsey grman he straightens it out so fast and I'll tell you no [Applause] [Music] no I love him he's a good man come up here Lindsay come up here Lindsay come here let's look at that greeting again if we could is uh yeah there you go paper covers rock and that's why he's the Black Champion you know and then Trump gave a shout out to his family first of all my family Melania Baron Don Jr and Kimberly Ivanka and Jared Tiffany and Michael they're so so supportive okay now Melania wasn't there by the way of course but did you forget anybody who was I'll give you a hint his name rhymes with generic oh yeah Eric and his wife Laura who were there he forgot them so then about 6 minutes later somebody hands him a note and he's like uh oh I better mention Eric and Lara so I have a son he's a very talented guy and he works so hard and we love him and his wife is very good she goes on and Laura and I want to thank Eric and Laura for doing such a fantastic job and whoever you are wherever you are thank you he's still learning to tie his shoes loop the loop I tell him Eric but Trump beat uh Haley in South Carolina by less than he had hoped he would beat her among voters with a college degree he and Haley were virtually tied but Trump won by a large Mo margin among voters without a college degree he does well with non-educated voters absolutely dominates among voters who've been hit on the head with a boulder or a falling brick and despite a loss in her home state Nikki Haley said she's still in this to Win It I said earlier this week that no matter what happens in South Carolina I would continue to run for pres I'm a woman of my word and that word is denial that's although it's interesting people seem to be so perplexed by let me make it clear for those who are confused about why Nikki Haley is still in this race it's because the guy she's competing against has 91 criminal charges against him in New York and Florida and Washington and in Georgia that's why she's staying in it it's like being Charlie Sheen's understudy in a Broadway play pretty good chance you're getting on stage Trump also made an appearance at CPAC which is the conservative political action conference where he brought back a classic Donald Trump [Music] entrance the USA that's right you're welcome the traditional molestation of the flag say what you like about him this man cannot get enough of our flag he really he just he gets in there on the flag he squeezes it he kisses it he banks it a little bit he licks it the crowd loves he squeezes it my goodness he even uh well he yes he's he loves that clab and then after fully impregnating Old Glory he treated the crowd to a new Donnie dance [Music] move I like that that's called they call that the trumpy dance it's kind of a so then fibra did a 90-minute set with no interm he pulled out all the gapos for CAC he said to the liars and cheaters and frauders and imposters who've commandeered our government the election will be their judgment day great he was totally unhinged that's the word everyone's using unhinged which means it won't be long before he starts insisting he's hinged I'm so hinged I'm hinged like nobody's ever been Hing very hinged very stable very combobulated so combobulated you can always tell what Trump's most worried about by whatever he denies most strongly like this weekend for instance he's worried about people questioning his mental stability you know this is all genius okay you do know I hope you they'll say he rambled nobody can ramble like this he rambled he's cognitively impaired no it's really the opposite it's total genius you know that it is it's totally right it's here's the thing if Joe Biden said one of the previous 19 things I just showed you from Trump we would go to the White House we would gently wrap a Shaw around him we would lead him out to one of those like old classic cars you you rent out for weddings put them in the back we'd roll the top down and then we'd let him wave at everyone as we truck them off to a rest home right is that not true but boy Trump is out there just raking in the dough Mark Zuckerberg by the way this guy he is the uh CEO of meta Facebook he was in Japan over the weekend for some reason Mark Zuckerberg feels the need to share his Hobbies with us maybe to prove he has a human pulse I don't know but one of them involves swords he likes to pretend to be a ninja turtle and and play with a sword and here he is making a sword he's um you can see him here awkwardly hammering I guess a custom blade that he's making for himself and I couldn't help but think as I watched this go on and on and on that maybe this he's practicing for when he gets to hell you know last week Mark Zuckerberg made a video hammering the Apple Vision Pro have you seen the Vision Pro goggles that they're the new uh and most advanced innovation in what they call augmented reality they're expensive so you don't see them much they cost like $3,500 so we thought it would be fun to have my cousin Mickey who can be gullible to test a pair for us but instead of the real Vision Pro we gave her uh ski goggles just regular ski goggles and we augmented the reality ourselves but did it fool cousin Mickey yes it absolutely [Music] did yeah you can set right up there so do you know anything about these um just that a little bit and so what it is is you put them on Siri cuz it connects to Siri will be talking to you and you can talk back and then it should be kind of [Music] interactive Hello Mickey hello welcome to Apple Vision Pro thank you Mickey you say apple please calibrate Apple please calibrate Mickey look left Mickey look right calibration complete good job Mickey thank you Mickey say apple please butterflies Apple please butterflies oh my God oh my God how cute I like this what are you seeing um orange butterflies do they look real yeah do you feel like you could almost touch them yes to end butterflyes say app sace applesauce Mickey shall I open a video window sure say apple please puppy Apple please puppies look down oh jeez cute what are you seeing um puppy's playing Mickey wave your hands to move the video what's happening oh my God this is cute well that's fun Mickey to stop the video say applesauce applesauce how about a dance party Mickey Apple please dance party I don't really know how to dance but I can Groove to it oh jeez it's a bunny how cute I like bunnies I'll dance with a bunny is this a panda or a bunny I don't know you tell us I think it's a bunnies you know what's nice about this can I say yeah like if you live alone and you just like want to hang out with someone and you don't can't at that moment you could just kind of like create a whole world to end your dance party say applesauce applesauce so what just happened it felt like I was really dancing with a bunny yeah even though the bunny wasn't there yeah Mickey would you like to blow out virtual candles yes all right can you see me I see you holding a cake does it look real yes okay give it a big blow a here put out your hands thank [Music] you yeah I like it this is fun I don't know what this is but Apple knows what they're doing at what point did you realize you were wearing ski goggles shut just now what is this and headphones that was fun I I have to say I really like that for people who live alone like this would be really good at like a convalescent home y anything possible oh hey Mick C Mickey everybody Micky

Channel: Jimmy Kimmel Live

Views: 2,562,025

Keywords: jimmy, jimmy kimmel, jimmy kimmel live, late night, talk show, funny, comedic, comedy, clip, comedian, mean tweets, Monologue, Guillermo, Hollywood, Los Angeles, West Coast, Donald Trump, Trump, Black America, New York, Fraud Case, South Carolina Primary, Nikki Haley, Eric Trump, Lara Trump, CPAC, Conservative Political Action Conference, Cousin Micki, Apple Vision Pro, Ski Goggles, Augmented Reality, Mark Zuckerberg

Id: eJo2geFQs9Y

Length: 15min 13sec (913 seconds)

Published: Tue Feb 27 2024