Jordan Klepper vs. Trump Supporters: The Complete Collection | The Daily Social Distancing Show

[Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] you've heard the news donald trump is on fire donald trump fresh off a landslide victory in new hampshire his success has baffled the mainstream media but it turns out the secret to trump has been right under their noses the whole time this is a circus unlike anything that we have seen in modern american politics this is the greatest show on earth is the greatest show on earth now if you want to understand the circus that is donald trump don't ask these idiots ask the guy with a sword down his throat circus performer adam real man people like the danger element of a circus in a sideshow you know when the lion tamer sticks his head in lion's mouth tell me you want to see the lion just chomp his head off yeah the audience i think always wants to know that this stuff is real and it is real we're watching a loaded gun on stage and it could go off at any moment and say mexicans are rapists boom it could say anything so there's a dangerous mexican's a rapist okay so maybe he hasn't been to many trump events but real man taught me that the greatest show must have a ringleader who can work a crowd gotta give him give him a pitch you have to impress them you gotta impress your crowd exactly your poll numbers it's super high correct i'm leading every poll nationwide you're the best that's it the best businessman you've ever seen yes i make great deals look at this show this is the greatest show on earth ladies and gentlemen we are going to hey let's bring out the snake charmer we bring out the snake charmer you bring palin out okay you betcha it has to be something that an audience will want to see everybody had a good old time you bought a hat hell i want to see this freak again exactly this guy got it trump really is the greatest show on earth right adam well you know by calling him the greatest show on earth you're kind of insulting a lot of the circus world okay regardless i had to see trump up close so i headed to one of his rallies and got to hear from some die hard trumpeters i think he's the only candidate in the republican side who's actually going to build a wall and who's going to make him pay for it he's going to make china and you know people say oh you can't make china pay for it you know what that's a bunch of horse crap it's pretty easy to make china pay for it china will be paying for the wall should mexico pay for the wall oh my mexico sorry either way it doesn't matter one of those countries has paid for that one of those countries is paying for that wall donald trump is inaugurated he becomes president united states what's behind that curtain take one of my cards defeation of isis defeation of isis yes what should we do to isis where officially should we bomb isis probably like israel area but not like not necessarily there but around the area i think he's gonna help with the isis what's he gonna do with the isis he can't tell us right now if he tells everybody then the next thing you know somebody else is gonna copy what he says they knew they're trump once i was under the big top we were all grooving to trump's power playlist which included tiny dancer like eight times finally there he was and he wasted no time shining the spotlight on the main event himself takes guts to run for president believe me you've been number one in the polls every single week i've been on the cover of time magazine so much lately when i was on last week i didn't even know they were putting away the cover can you imagine that's when you're really hitting it big he made the audience recoil at the freak show look it back there look at the press turn around and look at these people look at that six they start booing he whipped the crowd into a frenzy with a high wire act of political incorrectness she said he's a [ __ ] and then something strange happened we're gonna do something that's going to be whether you like dwight eisenhower no matter what you do dwight eisenhower i like ike everybody said he started to meander i just asked for tickets i wanted tickets for the debate this is washington d.c right people got bored it's an incredible building but then like any great showman he pulled them back in with his greatest routine a feat of xenophobic strength who the hell is going to pay for the wall what [Applause] classic [ __ ] trump had delivered i laughed i cried i reinvigorated my irrational fear of foreigners i even jockeyed for selfies with a couple of reality tv stars donald great joke great job got it a memory that will last for possibly four years god help us all [Music] [Applause] when was america last great for me i would say the turning point for our country was 1913 when we passed the 17th amendment and what's like back when like women couldn't vote yeah night 12 back up but again like that's kind of your sweet spot right there absolutely but 1913 what year was america great when it was founded except for the slavery stuff except for the slavery stuff you know i think we were probably our strongest immediately post world war ii so around the 1950s mid 40s 50s i mean i think the 50s was great other than uh you know segregation and women's rights we could sit here and paint negative faces of of all times in america correct it's make america great again so when was the last great it's always been great so we're so if it's always been great what are we trying to go back to we're not going back we're going forward well i guess uh the 80s were pretty good right the 80s the 80s great music cocaine crack cocaine yeah well we're always great the people are great so here yep so america is great right now so we did it no we didn't do it america became became great when the founding fathers put pen on paper in 1776 and decided to build a country based on laws that was greatness that was awesome other than the slavery obviously that was terrible and we did have that yeah we did have that and the indian thing right that was terrible and the women's voting thing but other than that that was awesome a few hiccups along the way you know like they say uh you you you nobody made it to the top without breaking a few pieces of china that wasn't an insult by the way [Music] [Applause] donald trump's new ideological screening test will weed out extremists with extreme views about religion such as its oppression of women gays and non-believers that's right trump wants prospective americans to embrace religious freedom gender equality and gay rights at a recent rally in wisconsin his fans were on board i am for extreme vetting i am i think it is a good idea extreme vetting i think that's a good idea of course he forgot one thing just make him eat some bacon these guys were pumped about america's values of tolerance so i knew they'd passed trump's test with flying colors fill in the blank for me two men getting married is blank disgusting actually the answer is legal in the united states it's legal but i don't like it it's important to believe in you know to have respect for everyone's religion so you respect christianity i do judaism yes islam no get a woman be president the presidency is a man's job i have women are qualified to be president no a female has more hormones she could start a war in 10 seconds if she has hot flashes whatever boom haven't all wars been started by men yes do you think a gay couple should have the same rights as a no i don't i really don't i don't think it's fair to the gay couple well no but the regular couple they work so hard you know and the gay couple they want more do you when you say more do you mean equal yeah they want to equal in that and that's just too much yeah no that's the wrong answer sorry hold on turns out trump's ideology test was going to be harder than i thought whenever i hear president i think of man it's a man's job what sort of i may be uh closed-minded no yeah well no um misogynistic no you're voting against your own interests that's it thank you very much these extreme nations they don't treat women with respect we treat women with respect here yes we do that's an american ideal yeah tell me about your shirt what's it say it says hillary sucks but not like monica hilarious so we were talking about treating women with respect it's an american ideal that we treat women with respect you got to give me the back of that shirt one more time that's too much fun trump that [ __ ] we don't even see the irony in it i love it right as passionate as these guys were they just weren't passing trump's ideological test luckily there was still time to study this will just help you prep for the test so if you take it again you'll be more welcome here uh this is a dvd of the third season of will and grace okay it's really likable and not too gay gay people this one is going to be good for you gloria steinem this really like uh humanizes women because that's feminist we have so much work to be done you know you a feminist no obviously extreme vetting was necessary to weed out extremists but until this plan was in place were any of us safe are you afraid the extremists are already here right now they could be anywhere you'll be right here they could be yeah he could be over there maybe that guy or this guy he could be anybody it could be anybody [Music] [Applause] this past summer trump flag waivers spouted a lot of theories about hillary clinton's health we see the coughing fits she's had it seems like a number of blood clots what on earth could be the reason behind hillary clinton's bizarre behavior look it almost seems seizuresque to me turns out they were sort of right we're now learning she's been diagnosed with pneumonia if the crackpots halfway nailed one theory maybe their truth fingers were in deeper than mine i had to find out i headed to trump rallies in the crucial swing states of ohio and wisconsin to discover what his supporters know that the rest of us don't do you think it's worse than pneumonia and where she looks yes what do you think is going on it could be parkinson's it could be ms it could be aids what makes you think she has aids uh way her husband used to be so you think bill had aids yes so how did bill clinton get aids probably messing around with magic johnson that's the natural conclusion yes interesting the clintons and magic johnson what else do they know they're saying there's like a double of her do you think there was a hillary clinton double yeah i think anything's possible when it comes to doubles wow a clinton double who knew so i printed out two identical photos to see if they could see what we couldn't which one's the body double say that one what is it about this one that makes you think it's not hillary clinton that little thing on her cheek is very obvious and and the scarring or whatever this is down in her throat is different they look a ton alike right this looks a little bit younger you think this looks younger yeah but don't you think if you just look at something for long enough and you kind of have a paranoid mind eventually you'll find a difference and make it i think something like that's possible yeah which one are you more attracted to that one yeah uncovering hillary's doubles is one thing but what could they tell us about our current commander-in-chief barack obama is a muslim he's a terrorist nobody will ever tell me differently we don't even know if he's a citizen if you if you don't look at the birth certificate there's almost no evidence there exactly so there's nothing barack obama could do to prove that he was born here if there was maybe witnesses that were attendants at his birth like his mother would you listen to his mother no no she has motivation to lie do you don't trust uh donald trump's birth certificate either uh yeah because he's been here forever how do you know how do you what's your proof um well his parents and no but they they're biased i'm talking about like people who could be in the room they'd be biased well like i'm just using your logic against you okay he acts like a muslim he talks like a muslim he also does the muslim principles as far as jewelry is concerned jewelry yeah jewelry certain months of the year not wearing his wedding ring that's some that's that's a deep cut you want me to connect your necklace to your christianity why would you do that well you just taught me it i didn't even know people were connecting jewelry to religion uh muslims don't wear is that a jew watch and one of the most unbelievable discoveries yet barack obama had big part of 9 11. which part not being around always on vacation never in the office why do you think barack obama wasn't in the oval office on 9 11 dad i don't know would like to get to the bottom of that wow mind blown they also had new truths about the media cover-up of trump's surging popularity i don't think the media really portrays all the african-americans that support donald trump so what should we be portraying where are these african-americans um when you literally look out across the 400 500 people here we don't see any they'll wave wave white people yeah it's like a dave matthews concert except dave matthews actually has african-americans in his band tell me when you see somebody who is not white here right here thank you brother donald trump don't even know how much a loaf of bread or a dozen eggs close so you don't you don't even support donald trump no okay so he didn't work turns out they got one wrong but the rest of their theories can be backed up with ironclad sources and what's your source um just facebook or twitter i mean everything and i you'll look at like facts and you'll put it all together exactly so outside of having no proof what proof do you have i don't have any i don't have any proof opinion your opinion do i have proof no do i have articles no but your mind is made up without any information my mind is made up good enough for me [Music] [Applause] according to the mainstream media donald trump's lewd talk and recent sexual assault allegations are eroding his republican support the gop is abandoning their nominee in droves the exodus of republican support continued republicans are deserting the sinking ship but i don't listen to that noise i listen to this throb this is jordan klepper fingers the pulse [Music] i hitched a ride to a rally in the crucial swing state of pennsylvania to ask trump supporters if he had finally crossed the line you know what so what if he wants a grand [ __ ] i want to grab [ __ ] that's a no i wish i could grab as much [ __ ] as he has well i'd like to grab al qaeda by the [ __ ] and shove some yankee doodle dandy right up its ass also a no but how were they okay with the presidential candidate bragging about sexual assault wait for it i think it's just locker room talk that really what does that mean guys in the bar talk that way when they see a pretty girl what do you guys say i've heard worse about men talking about girls women so are they are you talking about other like presidential candidates like mondale yes it's locker room talk that's what boys do he didn't do it well i don't i don't talk like that well do you have any children i do do they talk like that no they don't they're not those boys well no no you have a husband i do does he talk like that no not that boy no is that how you talk well no but i feel like he says how your dad talks well no but like your pastor talks no not so who talks like that uh well obviously donald trump it was stupid bragging mental men brag we brag right you brag a bit right um not exactly but i know quite a few people that do and background dab yes it was all becoming clear men brag it's just locker room talk grab it while you can trump what what is it the [ __ ] yeah grab it all the way again except i can't talk like that in front of my daughter you just did these things you say people can hear and the locker room was huge extending all the way across the country was there any line trump couldn't cross is there anything trump could say that could come on up that would make you not vote for him no no matter what he says or does i will vote for donald trump if he said the n word would you still vote for him um it wouldn't be right but i would still vote for him what if he said uh everybody should go uh little pigs would that you still vote for him then i would still vote for him yeah wow the media's fingers were nowhere near the pulse they had gotten it wrong people here knew trump's comments weren't sexual assault they were something completely different just ask this man who conducted a highly scientific survey i got news for you i asked a lot of women here and half of them would love to have their [ __ ] snatched by trump i got news for you that is news to me one man's sexual assault is another man's uh flirtation you must be quite the charmer with the ladies i i used to be you know i got the rig now one of them landed me she even squeezes so i can't get it off because she sorted i took it off once and there was a little mark there so she's no dummy oh well i think she's a dummy if she thinks somebody else is gonna do sorry bro just a little bit of locker room talk this has been a divisive nightmare of an election but in the spirit of moving forward at one of the debates the candidates themselves took an opportunity to say one positive thing about each other i hitched a ride to a trump rally to see if his supporters were also ready to rise above the anger and reach out to the other side can you say one nice thing about hillary clinton not really no no not one no no i have absolutely nothing nice to say about hillary clinton what about people who support hillary i think they're idiots no i can't i'm sorry i'd like to be a gentleman and say yeah she got a nice kid but she has a nice kid right i guess she hasn't proven herself to be guilty of anything yet i'm sorry jordan what can i tell you you're bumming me the [ __ ] out man wow that was depressing so i headed to a hillary rally surely her supporters would live up to their slogan of stronger together and teach those hateful trump voters a thing or two about kindness what do you like about donald trump nothing he's an [ __ ] is there any good thing about donald trump that you could say no no no i'll give you time okay let me think um no you didn't really think oh yes all right no you didn't you changed your hair a little bit and then you said the same thing he has economic background okay whether he can put it into a plan that will suit our nation i don't know no stop the first part was a nice compliment you weren't loved enough as a child oh baby be nice be nice so both camps have a ways to go maybe they just needed a little push what if i gave you two dollars would you say something nice about hillary clinton no what if i gave you ten dollars no what if i told you it will help our society to put aside your partisanship and actually say something kind about somebody that half the country supports not hillary no no okay how about this democrats like expressing their feelings maybe that was the way in we're gonna do a i feel statement talk to donald trump okay i want you to say when you blank i feel blank when you say grab her by the [ __ ] i feel like a disrespected woman okay that's good when you say let's build a wall i say let's build you into the wall okay see what you did right there you didn't say i feel what you did is you use that as an opportunity to be negative now that's something you know who would do something like that donald trump don't do this this wasn't working if i couldn't unite the people maybe i could unite their slogans wait no that's not it good okay better that can work make america stronger stronger together again yeah clunky but it it's it's a couple of works make america stronger together again a little bit of both trump way to move forward okay just trying to move my sport make america stronger together again a little bit of both you know what i mean for hillary i don't want big it's for us coming together we'll be together don't worry about that in hell but then just when i gave up hope i finally heard it that one positive thing okay well there's gotta be something good about donald trump let's come over pretend your husband is hillary clinton say something nice i like your hair i mean his hair is hilarious his hair is real nice hair so if there's one thing we can all rally around as a country it's great hair god bless america not even a month since the campaign ended with victory donald trump was getting the ban back together again for something the president-elect planning to visit those states that helped him secure a win for the white house a trump victory tour a victory tour now they tell us they want us to call it a thank you tour they're calling it a victory tour i mean i don't think we've ever seen that before we're calling it a thank you tourist right no one in the media or trump's camp seems to know exactly what this event is so i went to cincinnati to find out what is this uh we know what we got a bunch of people who are really excited about trump they said we're gonna get tired of winning we're not tired he wants to let the people know that things are still going on the stuff that he was still campaigning about he's still going on i mean it's it's it is it's obvious if he doesn't know when the campaign ends that's right what is it again it's victory tools victory tours take another lap right yeah take another lap why not how many of these rallies do you think you'll see in the first 100 days i'm gonna go with 15. it's like the never ending tour never-ending tour we don't have to do any work we can just party all the time all day long all day long somebody's gonna have to run the country yeah well just think tr the trumpster is our president from apprentice to president i love i love trump it's incredible right at least you want to blow your brains out it's so mind-boggling nick jesus was right this was a hell of a bash while trump has changed his tune on things like locking up hillary and draining the swamp these people were partying like it was october 2016. they had their signs and their background dabs and they knew the lyrics to all the hits we're ready we're ready yeah build the wall build a ball join the swamp lock her up we're gonna lock her up of course of course uh now some people are saying she's a good person shouldn't be prosecuting well they're liars well that person is donald trump bray net swamp at least we know donald trump's not gonna stand for having hillary's elitist new york bankers anywhere near the government none of the books except for bringing in some billionaire bankers it's gonna happen it's gonna yeah sure sure so some of them i'm sure the goldman sachs guy i mean that is the swamp we want to drain sure but also make secretary of the treasury oh yeah the swamp will be drained now he does have a couple people like steve mnuchin who wants goldman sachs you got to fill this watch you gotta yeah there's parts of the swamp they're gonna come in there's parts of the swamp they're gonna you know that's just not as catchy to say so yeah it's not yeah don't you want the most qualified person even though it might be a so-called you know swamp member lobbyist or whatnot is that not the best thing to do somebody who's the most qualified for the job has the most experience even if some of their background is suspect that's the person who should have that job that's right a common sense way of looking at things that was i think hillary clinton's entire platform the point is instead of spending time learning how to run the country or following through on campaign promises having a rally like this just feels so good the bottom line is we won we won big i love you too look at this place you're gonna be happy we're all gonna be happy and i was finally starting to see exactly what this was it was a big self-congratulatory pleasure fest in the round this is kind of our triumph and so you guys wanted to like kind of get together in a big circular area and just kind of help each other release some of the tension and celebrate yes yeah exactly it's important for you guys to just all come together at the same time it's a sense of community yeah it's a circle jerk if you all call it that sure yeah it's a circle joke well good talking to you get ready america your forearms are gonna be huge four years ago i hit the streets to get the unfiltered truth from america's most engaged voters trump that [ __ ] we don't even see the irony in it now we're heading into an historic election and i'm excited to get out into america and embed myself in the middle of the campaign trail first stop rain stoked hershey pennsylvania but even mother nature couldn't dampen our spirits it's eight hours before donald trump arrives it's raining and there are people here how's it going good to see you good to see you again you guys excited absolutely baby you're running for congress i bet you are good luck anybody can do it a lot of familiar faces doris carol nice to be out there amongst my people once more how's it going guys here we go again [Music] since my last trump rally there have been roughly 37 marvel movies and one very combative impeachment trial but what else has changed so what's new this season um everything honestly we got this uh baby yoda shirt great america keep well i get it it sounds like something donald trump would say or yoda i suppose they have very similar syntax we're not all great speakers do you have any trump that [ __ ] you don't have trump no anything that's at all aimed at women not for women at women what are you hoping for tonight i'm hoping donald trump is just in a good and we're in a good place of mine right now i hope he talks about immigration so you're hoping for a build a wall i'm hoping for a wall who's going to pay for it who's going to pay for it i say that's what we're going to find out about it's either going to be taxpayer money so maybe that's the chat who's going to pay for it that's what we're going to find out about yeah then why are you here well because two weeks ago i had her dream and in that dream i was given this vision that's you you had a screen printing dream your dream told you that trump is gonna win and then ivanka and then don jr and eric tiffany is going to win in 2048 and then barron great all right all right but baron only serves one turn oh no two terms no that's only one term that's four years yeah actually these are mostly one-term presidents you're not reading it right brother no i'm like 20 no this is 20 24 to 28 that's four years and then another four no no no that's these are one-term presidents ivanka one term don jr one term for ivanka what's sort of what's a date ivanka is 2024 2028 that's eight years that's four years no you have a third year period here where somebody else gets elected it doesn't say anything about re-elected it does it says has her getting elected in 2024 and 2020 your math is wrong no my math is not wrong of course these rallies aren't just about spirited debate it's also an opportunity for trump supporters to clarify their messaging one word descriptor joe biden [ __ ] elizabeth warren elizabeth warren scummy bernie sanders bolshevik pete buddha judge that's just a joke what's the punchline who man trying to be politically correct here but you know so when i said butterjudge i thought the word you were going to pick was vet okay pete beauty judge peat butt pete butt yeah that's two words and i can't say the whole thing on camera what's the whole thing oh it's homophobic that's why you can't stand homophobia aside there was one big new thing hanging over this rally the impeachment what do you think about this impeachment [ __ ] [ __ ] why is it [ __ ] why because it didn't do anything it's [ __ ] it's [ __ ] it's total [ __ ] it's total nonsense and trump has been grooming his supporters to push back on any impeachment talk with this simple demand all you have to do is read the transcript read the transcript read the transcript it's all about the transcript read the transcript right transcript i have not read it but we should read the transcript we should look at the transcript right yeah look at the transcript have you read the transcript uh i i trust the word of our president yeah read the transcript right yeah yeah abso absolutely did you read the transcript i've i've i mean i've written most of it but there's there's nothing give them the transcript yeah i don't have time for you know reading all the you know impeachment all that [ __ ] you know but uh how long have you been waiting out here for donald trump since 8 o'clock hours a lot of free time absolutely read the transcript read the transcript yeah did you read the transcript i don't have to everyone else has i can read it if i need to but right yeah but it's important that everybody reads the transcript it is very important pay attention and think for yourself yes you have but to be clear you have not read the translation i haven't no right but it is just important yeah yeah don't be a sheep think for yourself but again just to be very clear you have not read i have not read it you just trusted somebody else yeah what were you saying about don't be a sheep don't see think for yourself do your own research right don't be a sheep it was a message these people who were being herded through gates and corralled into pens to then be guarded over by men on horses knew all too well these totally not sheep are ready for 11 more months of this whatever this is and so am i campaign 2020 here we go again [Music] [Applause] last week i went to tropical iowa again and while all eyes there have been on the democratic candidates a certain recently impeached former reality tv star showed up in town to get his own cup of iowa nice trump train choo-choo truck train choo-choo it's just awesome yeah oh [ __ ] i've had nightmares with that shirt been to a trump rally before no sir what are your expectations truth truth at a trump rally yeah good luck however all anyone's been talking about is the impeachment and while 69 percent of americans wanted to hear from witnesses like john bolton senate republicans wouldn't allow it so what did these folks think of the trial as it nears its end i think the impeachment trial itself is a joke period it's a [ __ ] show we think it's a complete sham he hasn't done anything wrong how did we get here with no evidence he didn't do anything he didn't do anything they were well said well that's it right he didn't do anything he didn't do anything so we should let everybody testify correct oh oh yeah no no no do you think john bolton should testify no why not well he could testify but i think he's uh vengeful for getting fired from his job i think he's a liar john bolton's a liar absolutely there should be a system set up where he takes an oath and then under oath he tells the truth otherwise he's punished i think there should be yes and maybe there's a judge who's put in charge like the highest judge in the land right appointed by a republican and then we can all see what he has to say would you be for a system like that sure while they seem to want first hand information from witnesses they definitely didn't want witnesses with first-hand information regardless they're sticking to trump's favorite old defense i've read the transcript for verbatim not verbatim but i've read the transcript meaning like i've watched everybody read it on the news i haven't seen the transition you know that's not what reading the transcript means but you've watched people read this right i haven't personally read the transcript have you read the transcript no [Laughter] i have spoiler alert he asks a foreign country to interfere in our election it's crazy right you know what i've explored this one before but luckily trump has two or five new airtight legal defenses there's no whatever that word is quid pro crow my lips are called it's it's hard to say right it's even harder to convince other people that it happened new word i just learned yeah there's no crime that's been um there's no crime they've been accused of what does that mean what what do you mean they've not make an accusation or brought an actual penal code yeah you can tell he hasn't done anything wrong just by his demeanor i mean he would be trying to hide things if he were blocking witnesses or evidence or something like that you'd be like oh you're hiding something but otherwise right he's saying let him let him see everything let him see i'll prove whatever you want want me to prove right but trump is blocking witnesses i don't care oh but we were saying earlier that if you're blocking something it shows that you have something to hide didn't obama hide his birth certificate he did and trump found that thing and it said he was an american citizen yeah i know so so who's got egg on their face yeah no who has egg on their face well so what do these supporters see in our impeached president's future they're gonna teach him again is it gonna be another one i i probably all the way to for five more years did you feel the impeachment was a distraction not at all i don't think he's got a skin that is is about as thick as it gets donald trump is yeah thick skin he sticks kid he gets mad if a celebrity makes fun of him on twitter well the uh um it's good i i like his tweetings he should take a victory lap it should have already happened yeah yeah what should he do ellen dershowitz got oj off oj wrote a book dershowitz gets trump off trump reads a book i mean he can do whatever he wants let's say it happens tomorrow trump beats impeachment trump can get on to running the country exactly like he like he has been doing for the past three and a half years now i mean and now with like no impediments no checks no balances exactly they need to have like more restrictions on who can just come up with articles for impeachment when nothing's been done it wasn't donald trump's way of going forward the only people that would be in his way are other republicans trying to get in office yeah he's finally he's evolved this presidency into a dictatorship that we could all understand exactly yeah wow do these folks care at all about our president declaring himself absolute ruler i think i might know the answer i don't care exactly in the era of covid social gatherings come with a certain amount of risk but trump supporters have found safer footing on water so i charted a boat and went to new jersey baby the site of a trump rally on boats while the president himself isn't there he shouted out to his beautiful boaters and it's the perfect way for me to get back out into the field to get my sea legs under me i had to talk to a real deal maga yachtsman like captain john of tom's river safe social distancing practices meant staging an interview that was not awkward at all we're going to the donald trump parade today and riley we expect over a thousand boats i gotta say i'm getting a little bit of boat envy here well boat envy peanut santa you you know i was making that connection too yeah enough land talk i wanted to see just how impressive these beautiful boaters were it is a line of trump votes as far as the eye can see it really just keeps going it's like an election polling place in a minority district who are you voting for who who are you i can't who are you voting for must be undecided i'm usually not so worried out on the water but technically this is an entire armada of jersey drivers hey thank you you too little history about the area we're here in the jersey shore that's the cove where snooki got finger and over there is the beach that chris christie hogged to himself make america great again this is a weird slogan for an incumbent i'm worried about govind voters absolutely love him and the president loves boating but why well because a lot of beautiful women come with the deal number one and he's always been loves women you know that was obvious when i first met him and you know as another man i could tell you could tell he was way looking at a woman and you know what another disrupting him with your eyes oh yeah that's the kind of guy he went in charge i was on his motor yacht down in uh atlantic city and he had a threw a party on it and i was um i was a guest on board you were a guest on board it was great uh uh don johnson was there robin leach i mean it was really a who's who you know now what trump wife was allowed to be on the boat what trump mistress and future wife was on the wall well i met both of his wives in in past years and everything the first one and the second one but i remember the first time i met him his his aura came in the room before he did if you had to rank trump's energy from a scale of zero to 130 000 what would you rake it at the top of the you know top of the spectrum 130 000 yeah close to it 40 000 these numbers keep going up yeah i know but uh he's he's that powerful i mean he's getting bombarded from all sides he needs to stand there he's not flinching yeah yeah he's almost it's almost like he's doing nothing well in many ways you're correct do you support the basic tenets of the black lives matter movement [Music] oh okay you understand that systemic racism is something that we all together have to collectively work together to dismantle i don't know if they're understanding i'm gonna try something more their speed what's your favorite bon jovi song [Music] i wonder what the relationship is between number of flags and midlife sexual insecurities one to one if you can't beat them join them so i used maritime signal flags to speak the beautiful language of the truntilla as the day wound down it was clear the event was a success of course the threshold was pretty low i don't think we saw one fire and one thing broke yeah or one minority to be fair well not true if you look closely you'll see everybody here you'll see everybody that brought in here it's very diverse i see yachts i see skiffs i see jet skis sure the rest of the country is suffering through a historic pandemic and a major economic and racial reckoning but out here for the bear-chested admirals the jet ski superheroes and the froze pirates there's still only one man suited to be president he doesn't speak or you know like a normal you know politician but he talks like a billionaire and a businessman out of new york yeah i know a lot of people i mean because i'm a businessman i have lots of friends that are very successful business people and he um you know he's really perfect for the job right now do you think you're speaking from a position of privilege no not so much as a privilege but uh just my instinct uh again to be clear your position is on the front of a 50 foot long yacht 70 70. yes but you're a common man i am you might think hours in the hot sun bouncing on choppy seas listening to choppy arguments might take its toll on a liberal land lover like myself and you'd be right on the day donald trump most likely contracted covet at an event in the rose garden he hosted another slightly different kind of super spreader event a campaign rally these rallies are a known vector for spreading many of trump's favorite lies so i traveled to the battleground state of pennsylvania to see just how many people had caught trump's version of reality i'm here at a trump rally in harrisburg pennsylvania we are weeks away from the election months away from finding out who wins and probably about a year away from losing a loved one to the inevitable civil war let's do this yeah make america great again [Music] rambo flag classic how's it going you mind if i check out some of your stuff yesterday we did fifty four hundred dollars in sales what is selling now is there anything two hundred thousand deaths later that doesn't quite work as well not with the trump stuff it's almost as if uh the trump stuff isn't affected by that at all exactly yeah tell me about these shorts well we got the donald trump shorts you know we got a rep president today you got to be careful donald trump that close to your genitals in a decade he's going to deny he was ever there and countersued pretty funny when did you get out here to see donald trump uh about 26 hours ago 10 o'clock yesterday morning so you're gonna wait two days to see the president first of all come on donald trump is our first rock star superhero president he's the real life tony stark they should call him president iron man well tony stark gave a [ __ ] about science [Laughter] so much excitement in the air so many droplets you feel like people are going to feel this effect for weeks to come why no mask frankly i forgot it in my car i forgot to grab it on the way out honestly it's not even for coven i just think all of the sharpie fumes are not super healthy for you probably not when it was still wet what do you think about uh the whole mask situation right now are you worried about covid um for me like me personally i'm not worried but my dad is like underlying health conditions okay so if if he gets it he's gonna be in trouble why come here and take that risk if your dad has health issues just to see trump so it's it's worth a little bit of risk yeah [Music] nice flags man i love them wear a mask back at it i don't live on the dictators the efficacy of trump's herd mentality theory was on full display that's america right there that's freedom that's freedom that's freedom are you excited about the scope of course i am what are you excited about uh it's gonna fill the court with constitutional loving americans again that court has been too liberal for too long really of course it has you're pro-life of course it's important for americans to do whatever they can to protect a human life yes why aren't you wearing a mask i mean again it's a personal choice i think if everybody was wearing them and everybody said put a mask on i respect everybody's wishes and put it on we're not cheap we're not sheep you're not cheap but if everybody here was wearing masks if everybody was wearing it but again we're not cheaper you're not cheap we're not so you're going to look at what everybody's doing and you're going to follow that's it yeah but not people not cheap as the not sheep were bravely running into a tightly packed airplane hangar to see patient zero i couldn't help but think of d-day and the beaches of normandy well i don't know which side they're on as i traced the spread of [ __ ] i was fearful for those most vulnerable whose defenses were already compromised about two months before covet started i somebody put me on to q anon i believe some of it and i don't believe some of it but i believe only so much can be a conspiracy i think a lot of it's true you know about cunanan is there anything you can tell us that i don't know jfk junior is still alive what this guy is always behind trump at the rallies so you're saying jfk jr is still alive and spending his time in the background at trump rally from q a yes do you think racism exists in america i do not believe that people hate each other as much as you don't think racism is a problem in america i do not think it's a problem now there's a potential that jfk junior is alive and here at a trump rally baby hilarious but with just over a month until the voters go to the polls had the president somehow already contaminated election day if biden is elected uh-huh you trust the results no no they're cheaters but if trump wins do you trust the results yes absolutely i think mailing ballots is not going to be fair because it leads to fraud and stuff you don't you don't trust mail in battle not at all the president uses mail-in ballots yeah for they're going to use mail-in ballots for this upcoming election right right but the president himself uses mail-in ballots oh he does where he that's how he votes he mails it in that's different that's yeah that's different i was a different i don't i don't know i honestly didn't know that i only know what you're talking but you do know it's different after hours in the heavily contaminated parking lot i wanted to self quarantine and chill but i still had one burning question are you in a better place than you were four years ago absolutely absolutely is america a better place than they were i believe absolutely we have higher unemployment we have 200 000 people dead due to covet and we have riots in the streets let me just tell you this much yes i'm doing much better i'm literally making four times as much as i was making when obama was president what do you do i work for a debt relief company yeah so now as a debt relief employee you make more money under donald trump yeah i do yeah it's good to be a white debt relief collector [Applause] [Music] after an historic 227 year campaign i found myself at another trump rally one of three he was having in pennsylvania that very day and while there was still some of the usual totally realistic expectations i'm calling 47 states for trump at this rally in the final week of election season i noticed something different it was quiet are people just tired you know i think people i think people are exhausted me too and i'm ready to move on i've been doing a lot of trump rallies before and i i have to say this is probably the most subdued rally i've been to it's eerily quiet you can hear a q anon push notification ding in someone's pocket this was a chance to hear trump make his final case and frankly for maga country to do the same it's about the economy he provided jobs and when people are working and not out looting and burning cities historically this presidency has lost more jobs than any other that's not true it's not true he has that he has not have you like tony i need my sheet i'm going to give you facts come on give me facts what's on the back sheet i'm going to show you the fact sheet is that in my car we have not had a fact sheet before this is oh really bring it bring it i'm bringing it i hope it doesn't have a list of all the dead because that thing's going to be huge okay jobs added 4 million under biden and obama negative two points what is the website you're on i don't know you don't know i'll have to google it okay so her friend didn't have the facts but she did have the zinfandel let's talk about african-american communities and all the things we've done for that great what has he done with the uh what's your fee you know where he was corrected the uh you got to help me out here tony come here while i waited for tony to get her [ __ ] together i wanted to wrap my head around their hail mary october surprise and that's hunter biden and his well i'll just let them explain it you can see on you know fox and one american news about the uh the laptop the hunter biden's laptop and then all the corrupts and taking money from the different countries you know from russia and china and joe biden would do whatever these countries needed what did he do oh he would either what he did or did not do what didn't what did he do you have to be determined exactly what he did i saw pedophilia in china something like that do you believe it i don't know that's something i have to look into a lot more we see about like the the hunter biting scandal what exactly happened with that i think they found a laptop that had you know emails um it was an fbi they found a laptop with like emails and pictures of you know biden talking with like ukraine and china about business deals and stuff like that which biden uh hunter biden did something happen they want to push it to get it you know get the investigation underway before the election yeah but what's the investigation on about just the laptop and just did what was on it what was on the laptop i mean could the conspiracy theorists would say that it's joe biden and hunter biden communicating with you know outside countries on business deals and stuff like that are you calling him a conspiracy theorist that's just what he said right the conspiracy because only because it hasn't been proven yeah make a ton of money and do absolutely nothing except say hey you can meet my dad that's a disgusting trait right to just use your father's name to make money off of that absolutely nepotism needs to be looked into big time yes what do you think about ivanka oh she's so gracious i see ivanka as someone who is following or creating and enhancing people's lives around jobs and training and whatever causes she has just like lady diana had 20 years ago she had certain causes aids and different things like that that she was involved with lady diana seeking copyrights in china while she had a position of power i don't know what you're talking about as the horn rang and the masses filed into the last rally there was a bittersweet feeling in the air folks are heading on in this is the last chance for them to get unfettered access to the president united states after after this it might be through plexiglass maybe with a telephone if this somber attitude was a reflection of what could happen on election day are these folks prepared for a world post-trump trump could totally win if for some chance he doesn't win what happens to all of this afterwards me personally sure i will not live under a socialist government and just look up the three red flags on the biden campaign poster there's three red lines yeah look it up on google well i think it's an e it's supposed to be an e but look at the three red flags or three red banners and they mean communism he snuck communism right there on the flag you got it really you don't want to be in a place of socialized medicine nope so where would you go i'm going to look at costa rica costa rica which has universal health care yeah i mean i'm just i'm not going to live under socialist rule i don't think biden's going to make the four years and the camelback forget it the camelbak who's that kamala oh wow that both mispronounced the name and uh xenophobic yeah absolutely wow that's a twofer if they don't take you in costa rica i'm sure argentina would welcome you and your point of view with open arms so the pitches have been made and the escape routes planned nothing left to do other than vote your asses off and hope we get the results soon until then i'll be hiding out right here good luck america [Music] [Applause] trump's people were gathering so i went to washington dc to the self-proclaimed and self-counted million maga march where moms for trump manga dads and free jazz instrumentalists for trump converged to do what exactly we are here to celebrate the winning of donald trump oh you're four years too late huh you're four years too late what no no he won this time this time you won not the size of the flag that matters it's how many votes you get electoral college system they were here to celebrate the fact that america is a rich diverse nation with so many different kinds of alleged election fraud there's people there's people that's that's changing votes who people across across the united states where did you hear this all over we can't ignore it we're talking about having dead people vote number one should trump have appealed more to the dead person vote should he appeal we just need fairness to me the biggest fraud is unfortunately the millions of voters that voted for biden that were brainwashed by the media everybody said that they're standing on your flag it's a big flag it's also not an american flag star is a stripe signer brother just appreciate it if you don't see that it feels like it's mostly donald trump obscuring still i appreciate if you don't stand up be honest if anybody's disrespecting a flag i think it's the 10-foot high donald trump i have an analogy in the nfl there's a close play what do they do they really review it right and sometimes it takes them 15 minutes there's delays the game they got to look at every little technicality let me do one i got an analogy it's like the nfl there's a game okay it's the lions versus the packers the lions lose everybody goes home but the lions stay on the field and they say we didn't lose and everybody's like well if you look at the scoreboard it's like uh-uh he didn't lose who didn't lose trump but he had less votes oh yeah yeah but you gotta take california out of the equation and he wins the nashville if you definitely discount certain people then the numbers add up in your favor okay for what you want to stop the steal bro stole it stole it blatantly what what's what's the evidence the the the mail-in ballots first of all we all know the whole corona was to send the mail-in ballots out to steal the election along with the uh the voting machines are all compromised so anyway the corona was created to create the democrats are working with the communist chinese to put biden in because uh because china has blackmail on joe biden that is a fact you have that on any t-shirt no people are stealing our it's elections this is our country people are stealing our elections how are they stealing the election because they're putting voter fraud it's suspicious how are they putting voter fraud department of homeland security said was the most secure election in america who's that that's one guy like you and me broseph that's donald that's donald trump's department of homeland security and so because one person says something that's definitely means what it is that's the government and the court trump trump's lawyer said there's no fraud don't try and twist the baby i've been in politics for a long time don't try and twist me baby you're in politics i am the regional tea party chairman baby you're the tea party i'm the tea party baby i'm the regional tea party chairman in the frenchburg region come on fake news what you got go find yourself a safe space we are patriots let me get this straight you're yelling at me to find a safe space and you have elevated yourself with a megaphone and you have a shield they were having trouble facing the reality at hand though there were occasional signs of progress something fitting about a u-haul truck here yet no one seems to acknowledge that trump's legal defense is crumbling it doesn't matter though for these guys some battles never end what is that is that is that trump that's trump on a confederate plane that's confederate flag yeah see that cnn who will say buddy you don't know how to pick a winner you might as well put a jets hat on if they don't trust this election's narrative which the rest of the world is seeing what do they trust i trust trump and what he says and what he knows you know i don't trust the media that much so the only person you really believe is donald trump himself uh that's not the only person i believe who else do you believe i mean ultimately i believe jesus is king and i believe the bible that's like two you got jesus and trump no i trust a lot of people my friends my family tucker carlson tucker carlson jesus and donald trump and more i can go on and on if you want no i think i get the picture we used to like fox we don't like fox we don't like msnbc we don't like cbs we don't like any of the fake news channels because they lie all the time what happened to fox was it their coveted covers that turned you off no what about hannah i like hannity tucker tucker and taco yeah so just two hours every day of fox news otherwise it's a complete boycott yes absolutely even fox wasn't welcome at this magapalooza which was feeling less like the peace and love of woodstock and more like the buzzkill at altima the end of an era complete with actual knife violence are you guys the liberal media i have one word for you you are controlled by the deep state that's like four or five six words ten words that's even two that one's even two questions and i have one more for you two words that's two that's two words can no one in the manga world count [Applause] [Music] you

Channel: undefined

Views: 4,233,086

Rating: 4.8233323 out of 5

Keywords: the daily show, trevor noah, daily show with trevor noah, the daily show episodes, comedy central, comedians, comedian, funny video, comedy videos, funny clips, noah trevor, trevor noah latest episode, daily show, trevor, news, politics, daily show trump, trevor noah trump, trump, coronavirus, jordan klepper, trump rally, donald trump, klepper fingers the pulse, joe biden, election, vote, 2020 election, maga, tea party, protest, 2016 election, hillary clinton, conspiracies

Id: 7OeeHz0uNdM

Length: 59min 22sec (3562 seconds)

Published: Fri Dec 25 2020

Reddit Comments

[u/dirtyqtip]

TIL there are people who think Obama was president in 2001.

[u/Mr_Fuzzbucket]

The moment he can’t keep it together as the debt relief guy praises his booming business....

[u/Jackbo_Manhorse]

Jordan Klepper is honestly so quick with his comebacks and jokes, it’s hilarious. Watch some more of his videos, the guy is on fire and rarely loses a beat when dealing with crazy people like them.

[u/IfIKnewThen]

This shit never gets old. It would be a helluva lot funnier if it wasn't for the fact that these people elected a reality TV moron president.

[u/KingOfTheFluffyCats]

I mean, the guy talking about Bill giving Hillary AIDS wasn't sounding too crazy until the Magic Johnson part.

[u/IoSonCalaf]

What did happen to Isis? That’s a name I haven’t heard in a long time...

[u/bmking]

Mirror for Canadians?

[u/ToughLower]

Give this man the Nobel Peace Prize, I would have gone berserk.

[u/[deleted]]

[removed]