Tim Hawkins redding

bacon [Music] I would review [Music] [Applause] brand new one I need the words I didn't know if you can relate to this [Music] I'm in love with Walmart and I've go leaves twice a day they guarantee low prices so on there instead I love the most is what they give away for free is those little West it Walmart back to being the most evening I don't more bags more badges over anything break your arm you gotta swing around your bowling ball broken the last rack you don't know how I would do without my Walmart back and I'm legal on from this centers some folks in California they don't where were they they want us to use neighbor canvas and for something great but these wagons are the only thing that I'm recycling market smart bag carry on or picnic basket a raincoat for your Pomeranian or hamster text I've done that I am so very thankful for the miracle of plastic these are for a lunchbox backpack shower cap my perception kid oven it whatever you need from it a territory when you want Candide use a decision when wanting and he go ahead Margaret and I act when you stub your toe on a parachute your job Joe it was hard to learn all our guys well on our FedEx they'll make great bandanas hairnet our wallet ticket catch the hope to Nana the diaper or a spit Cup or if you play capture the flag there are so many things [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Music] [Music] get on the type of guy when I'm home on the weekends I like to take my family to the Lord's house on the Lord's Day it seems like when I bring the other Lord's house on the Lord's Day I'm filming one in my family that's ready to go to the Lord's house on the Lord's Day I think I'm on the Lord knows where the rest of my family is there's somewhere in the house I can hear the battery defeated the right of a water bottle and I and I know that it's sad though by the time I get him in the car to go to the Lord's house in the Lord's Day I feel the urge to do physical harm to another a lot of the moss that I have in my head I'm going to the Lord's house in the Lord's Day I don't think they came in the Lord I understand easy to get the car in okay please one way or the other we're gonna meet Jesus [Music] because the Lord didn't let me before angels that's true sometimes those angels have a really smart mouth and they need it takes the Lord's back [Music] here so that's the Lord today I had time to write on the songs to come up with ideas so one morning I was thinking whoever wrote this song I think he should have wrote it like this [Music] Oh [Music] because we return I know joy interviewed Harbor [Music] [Music] [Music] the teenage New Zealand [Music] and the babies run down Street [Music] [Music] [Applause] God gave you that's all they're gonna church ladies of the sing a special song before the song she's like cupcake me then and then she think they're not they're thinking maybe you should get it back not only does good things honey what that was just out that [Music] got a TV that song something horrible happen in the transition ah stop drop don't know why I think the way I do the way any just think the way we do grind them people my age I don't know surprise that living this long I have a most likely we survived mentally growing up with some of the songs and nursery rhymes that they taught us we just thought it was normal and this until family night I was driving the other day it was raining really hard so I started singing that song it's raining it's pouring the old man is snoring he went to bed and he bumped his head and he couldn't get up in the morning [Music] it's kind of dark in we will that song and what happening here I ran in and then tried to wake him up he's not responding hey before you call paramedic you ready my guitar that you'd say I already have [Music] what's it about bullet force trauma [Music] sing a song of sixpence how to pull the ride four and twenty blackbirds baked in a pie is the water in right now and you play oh now I got to get home Blackbird bye [Music] that apple cherry I didn't got home because my brothers did he happen it they're going to be do it backwards back [Music] and be careful because when the pie is opened the birds began to sing I think they're screaming you know he didn't do the film how jumped over the moon the little dog laughed to see such sport and the dish and away withstood this nursery rhyme brought to my letters LSD the handing up typewriters one stop what was going on there here's a pencil write down what you see [Music] well I'm going to do one more so hearing about this is true [Music] hello coffee my old friend to order you again grinding of espresso beans I need a double shot of pure and even on speakers soothe my brain sawaal remain in the cell Astana quiet I need to be the morning well leather chairs a song [Music] [Music] time three [Music] I'm sorry [Music] hundred hipsters maybe home we will pay with a dreamy wait little ringing Oh all right there manager crayon [Music] check [Music] [Applause] thanks for coming out tonight we're out of here in a minute I got some change to do Antoninus that's the thing trying to courage you you can totally do this live your life make notes tell strangers you don't need us there's nothing special wonderful to us the only difference twenty used I have a microphone and talent that's the only two that's why do you know what I do people ask me what I do is I'm a comedian I want people call me a crazy comedian that's fine that's cool I'm a Christian I do comedy I know how do you were dragged here tonight I guess you will know who I am what's he gonna bring out the puppets be just minutes it's like I don't wanna see you label something Christian would be good I'm okay Chris opinion or maybe that's how you know I'm gonna be like a second-rate version of the real thing like Christian is some kind of like a cheaper version of the real thing all right good as Christians we should be excellent we should be saying these things that they're doing we'll be right [Applause] let me go to the shoe stores like what do you got well we on top of the line get our here Jordan's my coherent Indy bucks the best can afford those we got the Christian party the river joins I am really insults calm down [Applause] I don't know I just tell the truth you talk about my eager roll up and stuff I got the cheaper version of groceries when I grew up I don't anybody here had a mom discount grocery stores that's what we've got discount oh she's never made record discount pretty noisy tell it's a discount grocery store by the name of the store usually doesn't work sack in it saves a clock on a second don't even have sex with you they don't tell you that even from her uncle my groceries did you bring your him back well no because I'm an American okay Harry approaches up some juice box let me just lost your job never get the conversion of discount produce is my mom was frugal it's fruit alleged German word and it means defeat your people not having true for instance I can [Music] did you eliminate the neighborhood conference in a rather different name about your job that's what you want your Cheetos you with the average puppy 680 mound back and they are not you won't ever ever beat the system Murder Inc on what kind of cereal do you want Cheerios toasted hole it's like Ezekiel bread with [Applause] [Applause] and I [Applause] we can talk about [Music] but the thought would be tougher to the woman that we make relation with that because the salt will give you a night [Music] I'm almost Lima German that she would talk like that we never have been so that Q see if it's discount so it's all Shasta 800 cans for a diamond housing the money and all the flavors great cherry lemon lime ranch Thousand Island Camilla then my mom went on a dialogue to catch you got the first diet soda any member remember the first diet soda half town the tap one I can't taste better than the product inside they carbonated epic act that's what cat we have some stuff Unicron tricks and tap little [ __ ] now you're gone shouldn't part of the things on tap well it a beautiful drink and grandmothers joking never done good cookies we never got Oreos my momma see these cookies are called hide rocks [Applause] that's the name of an acne medication my sister going before my taste buds how do we survive that team spray anybody remember back in slang straighter leg was the better part of that scenario all the things going away oh no alarm again he's coming around the bed one sleek up on your branch [Music] [Applause] this is very real back chuckling anymore I know it hurts buddy that I love you lovely you would spray even spit on my leg somebody no big staple rub first that number big stakeholder which one of Satan's angels came up with that only gasoline mixed with gasoline remember that the Connecticut stains on the driveway he swam hurt all over my chest all night long I don't think I'm gonna make it that far the acid trip mama 4 years old and a-sniffin stunted or Cydia and then just taking sniffles ride the storm out you know she put bits all over my feet in football socks will send me to bed wake up tasted metal [Music] like bulls but your honor might get messed up you're probably sitting right next to her right now mom's all saying things up moms are never just worried they're worried that he left I can't man you can call me anytime what does the letter which is no longer dating and understandable for a break even thinking about pumping happening [Music] you're driving my crazy we today we great force fine be here there gently our change in the way we do bacon [Music] how far out but she made me that way like such used to say like someone castex funk we gotta go you better get your button here get your butt in here [Applause] [Applause] like that and that's what the babies again you ever lose your wallet ask your mom for help they ever any help when you lose something never em I can't find my wallet well let's gotta be somewhere [Applause] we're in the window like I know exact [Applause] maybe along today but your mom said you gotta use the kids all the time you used to like it at all I was a kid like you don't breakfast get out I don't want to eat for ten hours you're a teen crawdad drink power just go I love you too Michael I see you I see you when that street light comes on [Music] he's ready to do your face it's all the time you're seeing psycho mom to playground for like nilly and you have to plan B is we need you have to play for my making I can't be you I don't have you can't get hurt in a playground today Nettie and rubber mats and wood chips lawyers remember we're kids oh you don't see some of those arrives on the playgrounds anyone you never see the merry-go-round anymore do you there's a big reason for that I would not marry about the very good it was the chair go-round that's what the steel wheel of death we need that time is over when you were flung in the gravel all right here we go exactly don't see some of those rides you don't see the teeter-totter anyone remember the to your time that one time you trust didn't even go to the top of your head [Applause] see somebody will see swipes like they were in the sundaes remember twice and I said they spit out mental mammals that's 100 degrees outside here your shorts jean shorts or the pockets [Applause] [Music] Oh guys walk like this [Music] [Applause] suddenly Hamill after a while some of you still have a Jake something comedy was but getting laugh stuff but giving laughter because it's not mine he got me if I can't take credit or something he make it right it says he gives me joy and I just want to give it off just it's just so much more fun that way you know and I know that the world is a crazy place I mean either the st. Louis folks and it seems like you know but look the world has always been crazy I mean there's nothing new Under the Sun and the answers still the same yeah I don't think the opposite I don't think the opposite of love is hate I think it's fear the Bible says perfect love casts out fear and got this love seat ominous and one gives us answers he is the answer right he's he's yelling and then he is he's it he's the beginning of the end he's dead he's you know he's the way that you need in life something you guys are going through some stuff and you haven't laughed in a while but laughter so good that's one different that's one of the reasons you know about you easy enough laughter cuz I have to cook this process things that we can't really process anyway up nothing's happened me all the time I don't know what to do I got an email from a guy a while back you know say Tim I'm a police officer I'm a big fan just will let you know we busted in that house this week and found one of your DVDs change alive [Music] this love is amazing and that's what this next song is this one the greatest songs of all time and it's fixed with another one that we have songs of all time as far as I'm concerned I want to dedicate this song to Glenn Frey the Eagles hero I still have to do it

Channel: K Graham

Views: 71,558

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Id: yR5D_aPDqBg

Length: 33min 18sec (1998 seconds)

Published: Sun Sep 24 2017