The Incredibles explained by an idiot

we open up with superhero interviews and a car chase with guns that do no real damage a chase that Mr Incredible wants to stop but first he must help this old lady get her cat out of a tree by ripping the tree out of the ground and checking the cat out of it Overkill much don't you have super strength therefore in turn Super jumps to jump up the cat and take it out of the tree without doing all this [ __ ] also no way a tree that big has a root system that shallow maybe it does I'm not a triologist whatever cat says and he stops the rubbers with the tree even in the real world they'd be dead also the tree would be really dangerous putting him back in there like that without replanting it but again not triologist I don't know Duke gets in his 1980s self-driving rocket Tesla ejects his biggest fan who just showed up in his car because he wants to help him and be as sidekick although he is not a super and kind of useless and annoying and he goes over to stop another crime with thickness herself Elastigirl then catches a suicidal man mid-air jumping from one building into another area another crime is taking place [ __ ] hell this city has more crime than Gotham the crime taking place is won by a certain bomb Voyage dropping a bank and he attempts to foil his plans only for incredibly [ __ ] boy to come on his rocket boots and foil his plans of foiling's plans because he really really wants to help and be useful and he's like I'm gonna call the cops for you we don't need to do that [ __ ] the cops already at the bottom of the building because someone was jumping off at you [ __ ] [ __ ] anyway we're all doing uh Monsieur sticks him with a bomb Bob sees it tries to go save the kid hangs on Tim that's the bomb off the bomb lands on train tracks those uptrend tracks now Mr Incredible has to go save this train and stop it like Spider-Man he gets rid of dumbass boy and goes to a wedding his wedding he's getting married to Elastica or Mazel Tov then right after he gets sued by the suicidal dude that he saved and all the opportunistic passengers on that [ __ ] train that he also take and a whole bottle of Hoops gets sued by a whole buttload of regs which leads to all soups being outlawed and forced into living out the rest of their lives normally using their secret identities then years later Bob's fat with three kids and this is a perfect time to explain who is who and has what powers Bob is Bob he got super strength Helen is super stretchy kid one Violet can go invisible and make force fields Kid 2 flash flash on the yard dash if you're a denske that didn't get that that just means he can go really fast kid three Jack Jack his powers didn't kick in yet so they think he has none but it'll come in later and he can transform basically whatever he wants Samuel Jackson AKA Frozone he can free ship and buddy has no else he can just invent [ __ ] smart I guess back to it now Bob's fat working a desk job with an SPS shitty boss I'm probably correct on the SPs bit look at how small he is there's no way he has a big dong or even average sized dog anyway Dash gives his two he had to teach you extreme Paranoia by pranking him with superpowers he's not supposed to show and keep hush hush Violet crushes over a dude and uses her superpowers to avoid him in broad daylight no one is standing on her side or looking at her direction to see this [ __ ] and that's [ __ ] whatever dad's espresso espresso he hates his boring monotonous job and he's thinking about slitting his wrists with [ __ ] laser cutters that's the only thing that worked right he's in a stupid boring Rat Race and he gets home even more pissed than at dinner Mom Thompson like what's wrong honey I haven't touched your food I'm not hungry for me love then what are you hungry for she hungry for another type of me Tony's dick Shut the [ __ ] if they start fighting powers are used someone knocks on the door and it's a black man it's frozen he's here to pick up barbarino to go bowling which is code for let's listen to a police video for trouble and fight crime which we're not supposed to do they obviously do that and save a bunch of people from a fire and at least one of these people is now at the minimum crippled because they busted through a wall with them on their backs and accidentally ends up in a restored a cop comes in Frozen freezes him and they get away being frozen like that a he should be dead and B if he's not dead his eyes should not be able to move like that because they are also forcing Bob gets home to hell and she finds out that he's been fighting crime she does not approve of that and they have a small fight skip boring Bob almost dislocates his boss's head because his boss was giving him [ __ ] about doing his job properly and throws him through multiple walls because he finally had enough of his crap and somehow this only results in injury there are so many deaths in this movie that aren't deaths and it's pissing me the [ __ ] off but it's a kids movie Whatever Asian kid comes over the government do responsible for covering up to screws [ __ ] like I paid for everyone to keep the Trap shut but I can't afford to relocate you again that's a lie I know how big your defense budget is thanks for understanding bye Bob's obviously let go from his job now and goes home finds in his briefcase an early version of an iPad that scans him with a woman saying that she knows who he is and she could use the help of a superhero gives him this mission to do in return for big cash prize he just done all the details the message self-destructs which shuts off the sprinklers in his house I'm curious to know how he bullshitted his way out of setting off the sprinklers to his wife that's not important though he decides to call the woman from the iPad and do the mission behind his wife's back telling her that he's going on a business trip for work gets on a spy playing with the [ __ ] she beats him on his mission which is kill this big ass testicle with arms that her secret whatever organization built were foolish enough to give it AI so it became self-aware and went rogue and his job is to kill it really fast because it learns his attacks and [ __ ] so be efficient and not do too much damage to it because it costs them a lot to build and they want to back so they shove his fat ass in a magic eight ball and drop them on the island where the big testicle is he runs around a bit and finds his big bowling ball with arms he fights it a bit they drop down on the ground to some lava he throws it into lava it sinks into the lava shouldn't sink into the lava at least not that fast [ __ ] doesn't sink that fast to love him actually it probably depends on his density I guess moving on it survives the lapa and hops out yet all of them stretches him out and only ends up fixing his back so he rips his head off and jumps into its body forcing it to do some friendly fire on itself and rip its own heart out he walks away snowball and her boss are watching like impressive we need to bring him back and also have dinner with him so she invites him to dinner he shows up and she walks through a lava curtain to meet him that [ __ ] is so impractical [ __ ] up hard to achieve his actual lava how are they not dying from this okay Mr Incredible is incredible but how is she surviving this not a single beat of sweat is running down her [ __ ] face man how even is this possible is the whole place just just a giant freezer to allow for this one [ __ ] gimmick in this stupid ass room whatever they eat food talk about her boss her boss won't skip his anonymity he goes home in a better mood starts losing weight moves to testosterone new car spends more time with kids has sex with elastic girl think of the elastic girl puts he might do the possibilities no that's enough I don't wish to be horny anymore I wish to be happy November's almost over one must stay strong my guy gets another mission but first he goes to his old suit maker to fix his suit because it got a tear in the fight and Edna decides to go above and beyond for him and make him a completely new suit as well as fixing this one but not kids because they lead to disasters and after that his wife finds a slot for her on his old suit and here's some top two female on the phone she's like who that whole that's a business meeting gotta go he goes over to the island again and they treat him like a VIP nice food nice place nice whatever until he gets attacked by another bigger better testicle with arms turns out that the boss of snowball is Buddy or Bob's biggest fan who turned evil because Bob turned away his help as a kid turned into evil Tony Stark sold weapons to governments and [ __ ] but kept the best [ __ ] for himself including this point at you freeze you gun in his glove Roti using tutorial around with Bob until he throws him away and loses him for a quick second because he's too cocky Bob jumps off a waterfall and hides in a cave so buddy sends a bomb down there to kill him then sends the world's shittiest Recon drone to find out if he's there or not the Drone gets down there like meows look oh he seems clear to me and reports back that Bob is dead but no he was hiding behind the dead body he was hiding behind his skeleton how do you not see him through the bones actually skeletons on a rock he's probably hiding behind that rock whatever that skeleton belongs to a dead body obviously of a dead super that went missing and Robert about in the news called gay [ __ ] gazer [ __ ] gazer beam who carved the word he is in the cave before he died he'll carved the word Chronos in the cave before he dies so Bob waits till nighttime and jumps off a cliff like kiwi if you don't remember kiwi even too young and you don't know what two sinuses he lands on a transport Platinum to cut the [ __ ] with a flaming hot knife he breaks into Buddy's Facility by passing all the guards and super shitty security where are the security cameras there are no cameras seriously also look at this clip [Music] foreign Bob these three are occupied but what about the first guy there is directly on top of the door that you want to enter through how do you not see you again it's some more [ __ ] man I've done Diggity Dog tell you about it anyway I digress he goes to the lava current room and attempts to breach it with the only acceptable emoji on Reddit only to have it open before he breaches it with snowball coming out preoccupied by looking at her iPad he puts dum dum on gum gum down and rushes through the curtains behind her after she leaves barely makes it through sees this big ass computer and he hacks it say hack but he saw needed a password and guessed it was Chronos because gave it short on the [ __ ] cave and he finds out that buddy has been luring superheroes for years testing big ass super killer machines on them picking them off one by one till he got to the biggest one to pick him up and then do an evil plan then when he tries to leave his suit activates the Homing Beacon which sets off all these sticky ball guns and lights up the room to shoot at him and incapacitate him with all the sticky nut sacks stuck to his body stopping him from moving [ __ ] got all the way in there and the [ __ ] homing beaking blinking is the [ __ ] that got him caught maybe it was the Homing Beacon's special ways that it's sent through the air that triggered some sort of sensor that got him caught but that's besides the point he should not have gotten this [ __ ] far whatever homing signal was activated by Helen because she saw his old suit had a repaired tear in it so she contacted and then went over them found out he backed on hero [ __ ] and Edna made the whole family suits to fit all their special powers and included GPS trackers and each and every one of them and when she activated Bob's that's when he got crooked now she wants to go get him after a quick and fabulous pep talk by Edna she goes home talks to her children like kids stay at home and take care of each other but they find out about the suits because they have extremely silent opening doors I'm pretty sure and this shot she closed it and it's opening next she then bars a jet from troll face guy flies over to Buddy's Island to request pretty much to land but no answer so she gets kind of um what's going on in here she's like so better safe than Tara she turns on autopilot goes to put on a suit and I'm not too sure that's how I turn on autopilot but I am not a pilot so [ __ ] it whatever Sheila finds out that her kids snuck onto the plane with her and call the babysitter for Jack check but then missiles get launched at them so she gets back into control of the plane and tries to shake them as best she can while avai tries to put a force field around the plane as much she can but all fails so she flexi wraps herself around her children while the missiles hit the plane the plane explodes and goes into pieces they fall into the ocean but survive no once the missiles left a trail over to the island so they make their way over there by having Helen morph into a boat while flash rides her ass and motorboats his mom all the way over there there is absolutely nothing wrong with the sentence I just said it is completely factual so while that was happening buddy had Bob trapped in an electrical thing of a jig like or did you call I didn't call anybody I know what he's talking about so he plays his wife's voice asking for permission to land and that there are children on board while he launches missiles at her Bob listens to his family die or so he thinks and he gets really mad then somehow gets a hold of snowball and threats to crush her to death if he doesn't let him go and but it goes [ __ ] it do it I dare you I double dare you a double dog dare you do it but he can't because he's not that type of guy you feel me hell on the kids meanwhile have arrived at the island and she tells him to chill on this cave for a bit while she goes to save their dad and to put these masks on to protect their identity because it's the most important thing that you [ __ ] have shut the [ __ ] up [ __ ] those masks ain't protecting [ __ ] all these things do is give you a really weird tan line when you take them off making you incredibly sauce when you do take them off completely defeating their purpose so seriously shut up that cave that she left him and soon has to be evacuated because doofus here is launching his big rocket with a big testicle in it over to their Hometown to cause havoc and [ __ ] and the exhaust fumes for that rocket are exhausted through this cave in the main time Helen broke into his facility and saw the rocket checked herself out in the mirror no we must stay focused Brothers we must stay focused no she then goes all help me step Bob I'm stuck in three separate [ __ ] doors guards come to deal with this but they alert no one else to just try and deal with it on their own because they're [ __ ] retards and she frees herself and defeats them with her thunder thighs then hides their bodies in some [ __ ] place and somewhere in between finding which room Bobs him and actually going to save him there's a massive leap in time because we get a shot of the kids waking up in the middle of the Jungle in the morning getting clocked by a surveillance parrot and getting chased down by a bunch of NPCs how has nobody ever noticed his sleep in time why has nobody questioned it what the [ __ ] was Helen doing throughout this whole time doesn't matter snowball gets mad at buddy because he played with her life and she feel bad for Mr Incredible so she frees him and tells him that his family's still alive on the island so he gives her a hug which Helen sees because he just got to the room and she's like you cheating a [ __ ] relax baby I'd never give up your last audacity for a normal key they make up and go save their kids who are being chased by NPCs and flying chainsaw frisbee discs lots of [ __ ] happens and I'm too lazy to comment on but Dash goes Zoomies and runs on water via goes disappears these and Dives in half then they team up why does this force field around both of these nuts around both of these kids and dash hamster balls in my way until they bump into their parents and fight some guards off as a unit together a big family yay till buddy shows up and freezes them takes them back to his facility and puts him in this electricity Zippity shackle [ __ ] explain to them his evil plans where he's gonna send his big ass ball over there to terrorize the people and destroy the town then he comes over there with [ __ ] cheat codes and defeats it yay there's a new superhero and he's the only superhero great and then when he gets bored he'll just sell his inventions to all the people so everybody's super and then no one is super so he goes off to do this plan of his because the ball's already there all he has to do is fly over to the city and save it without even attempting to kill them first or even inspecting the kids powers to see if they can escape his Contraption because he's a dumb Jim jerky and what do you know why Force fuels out of the [ __ ] thing and freezes herself and the family they attempt to escape to go back to the city and save it while the staff are celebrating being evil and only snowball sees them running in the [ __ ] security camera so there are security cameras then how the wholesale chicken Dale ponytail [ __ ] [ __ ] it I don't I don't wanna I'm done I'm done they find a venomen with a hell of snowball they get into another rock market and she launched them over to the city her buddy is that playing pretend defeating his own robot with the remote control he has on his arm that controls it but don't forget [ __ ] gave it AI so it learned that this remote control controls it and removed it off of him and launched him into a [ __ ] building he gets knocked out then credit [ __ ] get there with the other rocket and I can't help but think that they could have found a different way to ride this rocket without stretching the [ __ ] out of this [ __ ] like that for who knows how long but they do get there the van lands survives all of this landing and this shitty ass parking they start fighting the tumor with legs it tries to teabag the kids to death but death to the rescue Roselawn then shows up to help after he found his super suit they find Buddy's remote and [ __ ] with it a bit try to keep it away from the ball lots of [ __ ] happens in between them then Bob ends up with one of its claws and the rests with the remote pressing random buttons to see how what works and [ __ ] like that and Frozone slowing down the Behemoth then Bob remembers because he fought that old one that the only thing is strong enough to take it out is itself and the claw he's holding is like rocket launcher because of all the random button pressing they accidentally turn it on and they accidentally turn it off again he's like no press it again she's like wait till it gets closer we only get one shot how the [ __ ] did you know that he means to shoot his own Claw at dumb [ __ ] you were even looking when you had it activated whatever they shoot the claw at it it takes its own power source out May win after that Asian case they're like people like you again that's cool mom calls babysitter that's freaking out cause Jack Jack is getting his powers and she doesn't understand what's happening and then she says at the very end that she thanks the Mom for calling in another paper search and they're like we don't call nobody and they rush into their house to find buddy there he freezes them with the baby in hand he's like I'm gonna take this baby now but I shoot to hole through the roof and starts flying off this jet baby doesn't like that I should say about that it goes with metal fire Goblin mode on his ass he drops it Bongo slouched up by that to grab the baby and she parachutes down then Bob Chucks his car at his jet which destroys it and gets him sucked into his own Jets via Cape he dies Dash gets to kind of compete in sports now Vaya scores some Tony [ __ ] happy days and they suit up in the opens yeah say goodbye to your secret identities retards to go defeat driller from Deep [ __ ] Galactic acid riding up on Greta that's right a color Greta what are you gonna do about a [ __ ] nothing because you can't this movie gets five aquarcus out of 29 Ebola caps [Music] [Music] thank you

Channel: High Boi

Views: 4,227,958

Keywords: high boi, the incredibles, high boi explains, the incredibels recap, movie recap, funny movie recap, haha, lol

Id: RFz56gIzKwU

Length: 14min 20sec (860 seconds)

Published: Mon Nov 21 2022