SML Movie- Jeffy's Text Message! 2023- Full Episode

oh man guys I'm so hungry yeah I can't wait to eat my turkey Panini and I can't wait to eat my ham and bacon sandwich damn chicken chicken and mashed potatoes oh there's mashed potatoes oh you know there's mashed potatoes oh give me some of that tatoes oh you can't T my Mash tatoes what wrong with you trying to tell my mash potatoes oh I love T give me that t Cody you can't have any of Joseph's taters okay all right guys let's eat our food chicken oh I'm so full uh be oh man that was a good panine Cody you didn't even burp uh yes I did didn't you hear it you just said the word burp okay look I can't burp okay it's a gastrointestinal problem Oh Joseph do you like your chicken oh man I love my chicken I toore that thing off Joseph why are you talking like that so what do you guys want to do for the rest of the day o dude let's play a game oh yeah let's play pickle ball you suck ass at pickle ball Cody you're such a dick Junior you're a dick yeah well you know what they say you are you eat Cody you're a turkey Junior you're a pig Joseph you're a chicken dude you're Cody's mom I guess I am Cody's mom oink oink oink o o o guys shut up we don't have time to make fun of my mom this is a problem we're animals what do you think happened I don't know wait wait a minute Cody you said you are what you eat I was making a wiener joke Junior if anything I should be a wiener but what if when you said you are what you eat it turned us into what we ate cuz I ate a ham sandwich oh and I ate turkey dude I ate a chicken wait that wouldn't make any sense cuz I didn't eat big fat whale so I'm not Cody's mom what Junior shut up we have to figure this out so should we call a doctor well yeah I'll get my phone hold on uh just damn it it's really hard to type in the numbers with my beak I'll help I'll help hey there somebody call an adorable doctor you're a cat yeah I know I don't really know what happened well my friend said you are what you eat and then we turned into the things that we ate oh so it's like some kind of curse yeah so why are you a cat well I mean I am an OBGYN and I didn't wash my hands before eating and I licked my fingers of course I was eating Chinese food so it could be the one so do you know what we can do about this this literally just happened and it seems like some kind of magic so no I can actually do less now that I'm a cat so we're just going to be animals forever sorry I look I've never been able to li My Balls before so I've just been going to town and I guess I have a hair ball now hold on oh that is much better sorry about that you see that that is cat ball hair so what are we going to do now I have no idea wait a minute Cody you said you are what you eat so what if you said we aren't what we eat and we go back to normal um okay you you know what they always say you're not what you eat yeah that didn't work maybe cuz that's not like a saying that people actually say like obviously you're not what you eat duh so we're going to be animal for the rest of our lives yeah I guess so wait you have nine lives oh that's right hell yeah oh I can lick my own balls and I can die nine times that's awesome I'm going to go run in front of a car I'll see you guys later oh man I wish I could like my own balls so guys what are we going to do the [Music] news breaking news it's me Steve squirrel Burger I got hit by a car on the way over here everybody in the world has turned into an animal for some reason I was eating a squirrel burger and now I'm a squirrel Cody you turned everyone in the world into an animal well how was I supposed to know that was going to happen I'm not the first person to ever say that oh what are we going to do what do you think Chef peei turned into probably a burnt casserole cuz he burns all his food ooh let's go see bro yeah let's go see I can't wait to eat my scrambled eggs Junior Chef pe's right there how is he still a human I guess he hasn't eaten yet dude he's about to eat scrub with eggs right now we need to stop him okay shf B [Music] no oh [ __ ] baby no is that a pig well get out of here big I'm trying to eat my Scramble EG wait what what happened to me you turned into what you ate Chef B Junior is that you you're a pig how did you turn into a pig because we are what we eat and you turn into a chick wait wait I don't have boobs nor a vagina Junior no you didn't turn into like a girl chick you turn into a baby chicken wait why would I turn into a baby chicken because you ate eggs you are what you eat oh so stupid and lame Junior figure this out what what happened I I don't know it's like a curse and everyone turned into animals you better turn us back right now to here figure this out well it's not my fault we're going to figure it out hold on Chef peip Guys I wasn't able to stop chef peip from turning into a chick well maybe if you didn't jump in slow motion you would have gotten there in time yeah it took you forever dude I was just being dramatic yeah so guys what are we going to do we're animals I don't know Junior I don't even have thumbs this sucks do you think my dad turned into an animal oh Junior you should check and see if he's still human you need to stop him okay Dad Dad Dad oh my God I must be tripping balls right now cuz W for Charlotte's is talking to me in my room man that's some pig no Dad it's me Junior wait Junior you're a pig what happened to you I don't know but why are you a frog I don't know I was in here watching TV eating frog legs and then next thing you know I'm a Frog why do you eat frog legs Dad don't judge me look it tastes like chicken that's gross it's good look don't knock it until you try it ew dad weirdo oink was that a good oink or a bad oink a bad oink so is your dad human no he's a frog your dad eats frogs he eats frog legs huh never tried him so what are we going to do Cody we're animals we can't be animals forever I don't know we don't know anyone else that's human oh my God Junior stop Cookie Monster huh cookie no Cookie Monster please don't God no I can't even watch Jesus oh man he turned into a cookie damn it Cookie Monster damn you and your love of cookies he was so innocent dude he's a cookie now that's what he would have wanted okay Cody listen we got to think of a way to fix this you're the one who calls this with your stupid saying ooh I have an idea okay I I said you are what you eat right okay so if we eat a human that means we'll turn back into a human right yeah if we eat a human we'll turn back into humans yeah well we don't know anyone that's still human though yeah we have to find a human that hasn't eaten today a homeless man yeah homeless people don't eat anything they never eat dude yeah so let's go outside and find a homeless man and eat them yeah okay all right let's go guys guys guys I found a homeless man over here oh cool let's eat him Pig chicken uh Cody you go first no Junior you go first okay where do I even start uh ow bad piggy I tried biting his fingers dude you got to rip his arms off look watch this B J okay you know what I think we should go inside and do this cuz I don't want people seeing us murder this man yeah let's could get messy all right let's take him inside all right so we're in the privacy of our own home so now we can eat them okay Junior go uh I'm going to try his ear this time ow my ear oh it's so gross oh my God Junior you ripped his ear off I don't like that he screamed ow he's going to scream out Junior you just ripped his ear off all right Cody you try to eat him okay I guess I'll try down here oh God junior he smells like [ __ ] peee in my pants oh juny he peed his pants I'm not eating him this is gross dude I'll eat him I don't like trying to eat him and who knows what kind of diseases he has yeah all right you know what I'm going to try his fingers one more time okay you know what go get out of here here that's Food Dude Junior I guess we're just not capable of eating a person yeah it's just way too sad let's try something else oh guys look how late it is we have to go to school tomorrow uh let's just figure it out then all right I'll see you guys at school tomorrow yeah man it's raining really bad outside hey Penelope or should I say baracy shut up Junior yes I'm a piece of broccoli I had broccoli for dinner last night and I woke up this morning and I was a piece of broccoli sorry about that sorry what is this your fault yeah I said you are what you eat and now we are oh so you had some turkey I'm guessing yeah and before you guess no I did not eat Cody's mom it would have been a good guess though oh of course you had chicken what's that supposed to mean Penelope all right class so last night when I was eating dinner I turned into a dog I don't know why but since we're all animals you can all go home no class today yay no SC today guys school's out already oh dude we got to go home and have fun what fun can we have we're animals let's go to my house and see if we can figure out how to be humans again okay all right guys how are we going to become humans again Junior you keep asking that but we don't have answers cuz I don't know what to do hey there who are you oh I'm Brooklyn guy I I I was a cat but I'm not anymore because I ate Stuart Little you ate Stuart Little yeah I saw him driving around his little car and I thought if I eat him I'll become him so I ate him and now I am him I'm him himothy him John's him Neutron H haa H Kimmel H Turner I I'm I'm him I'm him so what happened when you ate him oh it was pretty graphic I mean I snapped his Little Neck with my teeth there was blood everywhere it it was brutal but hey I'm him well do you think you can help us become humans again well I think so now that I can walk around and stuff so what's your solution uh well have you tried eating a human we tried eating a homeless man but it was really sad he kept screaming ow I ripped his ear off you should have let me do it I'm capable of some pretty terrible things apparently I don't know what to do Cody this is your fault you're the one that made all this happen well I'm sorry Junior I'm only human Cody you're human again I am oh my God I am well how'd that happen well I guess what I said I'm only human I actually became human wait so all we have to do is say that saying and we'll all be humans again yeah I think we should try it all right let's all say it together I'm only human we're all humans dude we're all humans again Destroy All Humans that that was a cool game and Destroy All Humans too that was awesome you play as a little alien guy you know that was great any anybody play that you're still wearing stew Little's clothes yeah yeah and I like this shirt I think I'm going to keep this screw Stewart Little I wonder if I'm going to poop them out later oh hold on man I can't lick my balls anymore oh wait hold on so how are we going to get the whole world to turn back into humans they all have to say it oh I'll just hold a press conference on the news and tell everybody to say I'm only human and that'll turn everybody back that's a good idea before you do that there's something I got to do okay Junior what are you doing get off I'm eating broccoli chill chill kill me wait that guy still running around what the hell is going on I can't believe summer break's over already I know dude I feel like we didn't even do anything oh come on guys don't get your panties in a bunch it's school and you can't spell school without cool and taking out the H cuz otherwise it would just be kahol oh yeah and I guess you have to take out the S too but you can't spell school without the letters in cool you can't spell your mom without fat you can't no no no because the letters f a and t don't even show up in your mom so that shows how much you guys know this is why you have to go to school welcome back crft today is the first day of school and to celebrate you have a bunch of homework we have to make up for all that time you had off during summer break a bunch of homework come on it's the first day of school teach give us a break oh come on guys you were just complaining we didn't do anything all summer but now we have homework isn't that exciting yippee w I don't want to hear any complaints class two months in no school you could have forgotten everything you R last year so this is going to help you remember come on guys he's right knowledge is power dude flip his desk one more time please hold on guys look at the drawing I just did of the teacher no way dude tiny wee wee that's messed up Junior let me see let me see pass it Cody pass Cody here dude that's that's a good one hey Cody what do you have on your desk show me Junior take your picture back it's not my picture yeah that's all you bro guys Cody show me that right now no nothing it's it's it's a picture of Sonic the Hedgehog naked I'm one of those weird kids Cody show me what you have in your desk right now no he has a really big dong I don't think he really want to see show me coder you have bunch of homework I have tiny we wee I Didn't Do It Junior drew it I did not draw that it was Cody yeah Cody did it oh no dude I am going to tell the principal run now no guys tell the truth what's wrong Cody stop being a wimp it's the first day of school I'm going to get in trouble all right Cody the principal is on his way and I'm going to show him this just tell him the truth Junior tell him the goddamn truth someone call the principal oh no the principal's here is Joseph okay Mr CH why did you summon me here for my comfortable office cuz the student over there in the glasses his name is Cody and he drew this let me get a peek he drew this he did Cody come here you drew this no don't lie to me boy don't lie to the principal if you do you're going to be expelled okay fine I drew it do you know what I'm going to do to you for drawing this I'm enter you to the international drawing competition wait what yeah this drawing is magnificent it's the best we've ever seen mhm and we enter one student every year in the international drawing competition but we lose but you you have a gift boy wait a minute wait a minute I drew that drawing stop taking credit for other people's work you didn't do this you're suspended for lying but you you're a genius I need you to bring that aame tomorrow cuz the competition is tomorrow okay but but I didn't draw this stop being modest I need you to bring that a game ch I think you found us a winner I know my eyes may be strant but I know good talent when I see it mhm I'm out what this isn't fair oh great Junior now I'm entered into some stupid drawing competition and I don't even know how to draw I know how to draw it should be me in that competition well that's what you get for line Junior you should have fessed up in the beginning well I thought I was going to get in trouble I didn't know I was going to be entered into a competition well seriously Junior what are we going to do because if I don't Inn this competition I'm pretty sure Steinbeck will literally kill me I mean just look what he did to Joseph yeah I think Joseph is going to be out for the whole video Penelope can you come back to my house and help me and Cody think of a plan okay all right Cody what's the plan well I suck at drawing so I guess I'm going to have to learn how to draw a don't say that Cody I'm sure you're decent at drawing no no I'm terrible come on Cody show us how you can draw show us something okay um draw a cat but a cat that's that's the one that meows right yeah draw it um Okay so just that what the hell a tail there what I got four legs so that's what those are and then uh it's got two ears right two and then some whiskers and then there's a little eye there you go that's a cat you suck at drawing Cody yeah that's horrible Cody oh yeah it's not like I just told you that okay no no there's no way you can draw on this competition you're going to lose I know so what are we going to do I don't know wait Junior you're really good at drawing right uh it's not like they were just Googling over my drawing saying was amazing and interal competition yeah I'm good at drawing okay so what if you were to draw for Cody in the competition how is that even going to work Penelope they're going to see him drawing yeah that doesn't make it I got an idea Cody how many of those ugly blue shirts do you have I have a whole closet full okay grab me one okay okay Junior I brought you two shirts and I don't think they look ugly in fact I think I look pretty spiffy what was your idea with the shirts why did you invite me just wait and see what my idea is all right Cody what do you think Junior this is not going to work how is it not going to work I'm inside your shirt my hand sticking out I can draw for you it's going to work they're definitely going to see you sticking out of my back and your legs are very obvious look they're just going to think you have back problems or like you have a boil on your back junior I feel so constricted I can't even reach my free medium french fries I get from McDonald's every week Junior this is the dumbest idea you've ever had you look like the hunchback of notra dumb get wck Cody Junior she was insulting you Junior why don't you just teach Cody how to draw yeah that makes a lot more sense Junior oh yeah I guess I could just teach you I can't even breathe yeah let me get out of here I'll teach you how to draw all right Cody are you ready to learn how to draw like a pro please cuz I I need help because you're going to learn how to draw a cat for real not whatever the hell this thing is yeah I hope not okay so start off with a medium Circle um man that's that's pretty big draw another medium Circle right next to it uh over here okay now put dot in between each one wait are you making me draw boobies no no these are not boobies okay so now I want you to draw the nose so you draw like an upside down three leaf clover what an upside down three leaf clover like between the the the booby things what like like yes like that just like that now now draw a round W connecting to the nose a round like like that yeah like that like that okay now put dots in between the W um like just yeah Dot all over oh okay just a lot of dots a lot of dots now put whiskers I do lines coming out each side what um like uh that yeah yep yep now now do like a little like scribbly like like round like like scribbly under circle like half circle underneath that for the mouth wait so like kind of no no no scribble all the way around it scribble all the way around doing that um yeah yeah like that now now give it two triangle ears um how that yeah yeah there it is there it is Boom isn't that a cat I mean it's better than what I did see look you're getting better so now if we just do this all night you'll eventually draw a professional looking cat I don't think this is going to work Junior I don't think I'm going to get any better oh no okay how about this during the drawing competition you have a walkie-talkie earpiece in your ear and I'll have a walkie-talkie and I'll tell you exactly how to draw it what you telling me what to draw isn't going to help it's still going to suck well I just told you how to draw this and look that cat looks a lot better than whatever that thing is I mean I'm not going to win a compet ition with this okay you know what Cody you suck at drawing how about that you just suck and we're we're going to lose I know that's what I've been saying this whole time wait I got an idea what if you call the principal and say that you broke both your hands and you can't draw tomorrow wait yeah that actually could work cuz if my hands are broken I can't draw yeah so call the principal and say you fell off your bike and you broke both your hands and you just can't draw tomorrow okay yeah okay I'm calling the principal it's ringing hot Ms in my area you say bring to me who is this hello principal steinback speaking hello it's me Cody ooh the young Picasso how are you boy well I was riding my bike home today and I crashed do you need another bike uh no I I I crashed and I broke both my hands so I can't draw well draw with your toes I broke all of those too listen boy we need you for this drawing competition okay we have never won and we need to win at least one time I promise my mom mom on her death bed that we will win at least once and you're going to win it for us okay you you're going to win it don't screw me over boy now where are the hot Mills so what do you say we're good you don't have to draw in the competition no I can't back out he seems pretty committed but you broke both your hands oh yeah he didn't really seem to care so you stop the draw you're going to lose I have an idea Junior why don't you just dress up like Cody like wear his glasses his overalls his bow tie yeah that actually seems like a really good idea yeah Cody you really think a girl can come up with a good idea well yeah I thought it was a good idea who invented the airplane the right Brothers not the right sisters okay but Amelia aart went around the world or whatever and got lost if a man would have been flying that plane she wouldn't have gotten lost who invented peanut butter George Washington Carver two George Washingtons did two good things first president and invented peanut butter how many female presidents are there Cody well we have a female vice president if the girls get lucky then she'll take over if that the other one dies whatever what' you say just dress up like C dumb I know I got an idea I can just dress up like Cody and then they'll think I'm Cody that's literally what Penelope just said are you serious right now I'm leaving every woman says that eventually in every relationship all right Cody I'm going dress up like you okay all right Cody what do you think wow Junior you look pretty good I think we might actually pull this off yeah so I'm going to win the drawing competition and when everyone's screaming Cody Cody I'm going to take these glasses off and this outfit and let them know who really drew that picture well don't do that when they know you're not me you might get disqualified or something well I want people to know that I'm good at drawing you're so stupid you get all the credit for that dumb drawing but it was my drawing no no Junior it doesn't matter that you're good at drawing okay we just need to win this competition but I want people to know I'm the one that's good at drawing it doesn't matter Junior the most important thing is that we don't get caught okay fine I'm going win I won't say anything hello and welcome to the international drawing competition where drawers from around the world compete to see who's the best today we have two brilliant contestants in this corner jacqu Pierre Francois no no stupid American can beat me enjy he may be in his 40s but he never graduated the fifth grade and in this corner we have Cody nutus okay boy you better win this competition the whole school is counting on you to win plus my dead mom so you got this go okay on the count of three both of you will draw the best dog you can whoever draws the best dog wins a dog well good thing Cody's not really drawing he only learned how to draw a cat one 2 3 draw using a shy what if you mess up I never mess up all right time's up stop drawing it is now time for me to come around and choose a winner all right jock strap how does your drawing look it is not my best work but it is pretty decent how about yours my drawing is the best drawing of a dog this world's ever going to see and I'm going to win this competition all right boys let's see what you did check out my drawing oh that's not bad I like the bark bark really let you know what you're looking at yeah I didn't want you to get confused cuz I'm really good at drawing cats so I wanted to make it look like a dog so I said bark bark so you knew it was a dog okay shck let's see what you did Jesus Christ that's the best picture of a dog I've ever seen well the winner for the 20th year in a row to the surprise of absolutely nobody is Ja prier fris I can beat these kids any day like taking candy from a baby oh that Frogg eting Frenchman he beats US every year I'm sorry principal I tried to win I know you tried real hard Cody you're only suspended for 2 weeks this time I mean that is a really good drawing of a dog I know phenomenal yeah we should probably stop letting him compete his happens every year it's getting pretty old you know people stopped competing cuz they just don't think they can beat them I'm sorry Cody I tried to win it's okay Junior it was impossible to beat him but hey I have no school for the next 2 weeks since I'm suspended I'm suspended too oh hey we can hang out for 2 weeks dude oh hey Joseph you're alive I have a headache what happened a door hit you in the head oh yeah but something bad happened to me me and Cody oh what's wrong B there he goes so guys what do you want to do today dude I just got this new yellow ball shut up no you didn't Joseph dude I'm telling the truth I just got it you don't have to lie to us Joseph yeah you don't have to lie and say you got something cool if you didn't get it bro I promise it's right here wa yeah I know it's so cool right where'd you get it from I got it from the dollar store how much did it cost well if you got it from the dollar store it clearly cost a dollar actually Cody I got it for free how'd you get it for free I got that five finger discount but we only have four fingers well four finger discount that's so cool we should go play catch outside oh let's do it dude well I actually heard it's supposed to rain tonight no it's not okay I'm just telling you what I heard I heard that on the news you heard it on the news yeah okay well we're not going to let a little rain ruin our day so let's go outside and play catch but it's still dark like we won't be able to see who we're throwing the ball to oh wow wow wow I can't believe you he went yeah he went there wow wow wow wow that's not what I meant okay so so so so you're saying that you don't want to play catch cuz it's dark and we won't know who we're throwing the ball to I can't believe him but I wouldn't be able to see you either wow wow okay we play catch inside with the lights on is that fine yeah actually that'd be a lot but what if I want to turn the lights off well it would still be better than being outside if we turn the lights off who wouldn't you be able to see I mean it'd be pretty dark it really wouldn't be you know what say it say it no no what how about we just how about we just check the weather see if it's raining okay okay if it's not raining then you're canceled but no breaking news M there is a crazy lunatic on the loose named Cody he's a killer who eats fingers and eyeballs he has had over 20 victims so far if you have seen him please call 911 immediately what did you see the news yeah that guy's crazy Joseph it's him dude that has to be him it looks just like me that's that's him bro we're just sitting next to a murderer I know what if he kills us oh man I hope he doesn't kill me what are you guys saying over there nothing we're not talking about you not at all yeah no we're not talking about how you look just like the guy wait wait you guys don't think that that's me on TV no no Cody yeah not you you don't look anything like him yeah it's it's not like you have the same glasses or you'll both have the same name or the same shirt nope well I mean guys come on look I mean there's a lot of people in the world named Cody and he doesn't even spell it the same he has a K in his name and like this is a very popular shirt plenty of people have it and a lot of people have glasses too you know it's not guys 911 what's your emergency please help please help that crazy Cody murder guy's at my house yeah please help us what are you sure it's him it's him it's definitely him all right we're on our way all the cops on their way that's them hello all right where is he he's upstairs okay you boys better stand back you're lucky he hasn't already strangled you and eaten your fingers already he's really dangerous all right hold on dispatch I'm going to need some backup I have a feeling he's not going to go quietly who are you talking to I'm I'm talking to dispatch where's your walkie-talkie well I have it it's where where is it it's okay I don't have a walkie-talkie okay I just like to pretend I'm cool and talk to dispatch go go go go get him okay I will just dispatch I'm going to go get them huh I wonder where they went get on the ground now you're under arrest what's going on all right oh this one's a fighter I wish my backup was here sorry I'm right mate dispatch just called me but but how I didn't even have a walkie-talkie telepathically mate ah all right tackle this kid stop resisting arrest you come with us all come on let's take him to the car thank you officer for getting that scum off the street oh he's so dangerous dude can you believe our friend Cody was a lunatic this whole time I know I never thought he was that crazy and did you see the way he resisted arrest with those officers yeah dude if I would have did that that would have been a whole hashtag yeah yeah yeah who's that at the door I don't know dude what if you escaped the cops no okay let me let me answer it okay uh hello no no no it's okay we goofed yeah sorry mate we made a mistake what do you mean you goofed well uh he's not really the crazy lunatic he just kind of looks like him oh so I made a mistake Junior I'm going to kill you what was that no sorry sorry sorry wrong choice of words Junior I'm upset with you but but he looks he looks like the crazy lunatic though yeah I know kind of but the crazy lunatic has sharp teeth and no hair I mean they're both ugly as Sin but that's not a crime oh well I'm sorry Cody for getting you mixed up you just look just like him whatever Junior but you call us if you see the real crazy lunatic let's go uh who was at the door dude it was just Cody oh no he brainwashed Junior I got to do something about this hello 911 that crazy lunatic is back at the house uh yes it's him I know it's him sorry Cody for getting you arrested it's fine Junior just don't let it happen again get on the ground get on the ground stop resisting stop resisting jph what did you do dude Cody was sitting right next to you you didn't see him Joseph it's not really him Cody's not the crazy Lun they just look exactly the same oh how silly hold on I'll answer it hello we goofed again yeah we made another mistake Junior why do you keep calling the cops on me I didn't call the cops on you this time Joseph did he doesn't know you're not the crazy lunatic well tell him that yeah and make sure you don't call us again unless you really know it's him yeah please cuz I'm getting hurt come on Cody look we go tell Joseph you're not the crazy lunatic all right Joseph Cody's back not1 the crazy lunatic's in my house again no no no Joseph hang on hang on Cody is not the lunatic wait are you sure dude Cody tell him I'm not a lunatic Joseph it's me Cody no no no put the phone down 911 Joseph stop calling the police yeah you're going to keep calling the cops you should just go home fine I don't want to get murdered anyway all right Cody Let's go ask Chef to make us something to eat so we can just forget about this whole you getting arrested thing all right fine hey Chef peipi can you make me and Cody something to eat yeah sure what do you want Oh my God this Cody the crazy lunatic from the news hey Cody what do you want to eat oh I don't know French fries or cheese sticks he wants cheese sticks or french fries okay okay I can fix that of course he would want that cheese sticks of french fries because he's a lunatic it reminds him of fingers he wants to eat fingers uh uh sure sure I can make that for you how about you uh go over there and sit at the table while I call the cops I mean I mean fix your food come on Cody I got a stall all right the food will be out in a minute guys just stay right here especially you Cody don't move is Chef BP acting weird to you no he always acts like that hello 91 one yes that crazy little Cody he's here at my house yes I'm sure it's him he's in the kitchen please hurry all right guys here's the food B na peti get on the ground get on the ground stop resisting get that criminal peee he's not the crazy lunatic what do you mean he looks just like him I know but it's not him he he just looks like him oh hold on hello this is getting embarrassing sorry mate Junior this is getting ridiculous look look no one else is going to call the cop on you because everyone knows you're not the lunatic yeah how about this how about we just don't answer to any more calls from this address yeah I like that idea I like that idea all right let's go all right Cody how about this how about we just don't we don't stay here we go to a restaurant and get a nice sandwich so we don't have to be here okay okay that sounds like a good idea let's go welcome to foot long bangers where we put a foot long in your mouth what do you want what do you want Cody uh I have oh my God is that Cody lunatic somebody call 91191 get stop resisting this uh hello hey I don't know why you decided to leave the house this is the one place you knew we weren't going to arrest him I know but I didn't think anybody else was going to think he was the lunatic and call the cops yeah well look I think he should probably just avoid going out in public for a little while at least until we catch the actual lunatic okay officers come on Cody come inside junor I think it' probably be better if I just go home I'm tired of getting tackled and put in handcuffs unless it's Ken doing it okay I'll see you later Cody okay at least I'll be safe at home Tyrone I have a question what is it baby and make it quick you know I don't like all that talking why do you cheat on me so much look baby it gives me time to miss you let me explain when I'm with another chick and she talk starts to talk too much I just think about you and I'm like man I should go back to my wife right now it's so sweet Ty yeah you know me baby hey Mom and Dad it's that c lunatic from the NOS somebody call the C get on the ground no get on the ground get him hello what again I thought we told you to let him stay here he got arrested at his own house yeah his parents thought he was the lunatic and they called us look just keep him here this time okay Junior I'm not safe anywhere look you're going to stay with me upstairs no one's going to call the cops on you come on SO Cody what do you want to do stay in this room forever cuz I'm tired of being arrested O I got an idea Cody what if we put a disguise on you and then people won't recognize it's you what like a goofy glasses and nose and mustache no no no better than that yeah better than that huh well Cody look it's the best disguise no one's going to notice it's you well at least I don't look ridiculous look I'm going to prove it to you Chef peipi get in here oh what do you want junior who's that it's that crazy lunatic in the disguise 911 that crazy lunatic's in the house he's in the disguise stop resisting yeah beat him up beat him up trying to get away with that I'll get it wait who's that hello okay now I'm getting mad well you said you were going to respond to any more calls this address yeah but when we get a call that he was in a disguise that was really suspicious you know especially cuz we said not to leave the house well we just wanted to go out in public with him with a disguise okay okay fine I'll tell you what how about we just don't respond to any more calls from this house tonight no matter what no matter what no matter what all right let's go come on Cody sorry Cody for the disguise idea Junior I'm just going to sit right here and I'm not going to move until they catch the lunatic say that again I'm not going to move until they catch the lunatic say those last three words again catch the lunatic we should catch the lunatic Junior the police haven't even caught the lunatic what are we going to do well if we catch the lunatic then no one's going to think you're the lunatic cuz a lunatic will be in jail Junior how are we going to catch a l lunatic well to catch a lunatic you got to think like a lunatic and the cops aren't thinking like a lunatic so let's think about it the lunatic likes to eat eyeballs and Shrek eats eyeballs in the movie he says he squeezed the eyeballs and use it as jelly on toast okay I don't really see where you're going with this well if we can get an eyeball and put by the front door then he'll come find it and then we'll capture him but Junior where are we going to get an eyeball H oh I got an idea in this bag of gross stretchy body part toys okay but Junior I don't think the lunatic is just going door to door looking for eyeballs to eat like Halloween C look it's worth a shot Cody do you want to stay in this room forever no okay let's go put this eyeball by the front door and if we catch them we call the cops okay all right Cody there's the eyeball so now we're just going have to wait for him to come and we're going to jump on them Junior this seems dangerous no we're going to clear your name okay come on is that a yummy eyeball I smell ooh yummy eyeball give me yum all right Cody jump on him bring him bring him bring him aside throw him in the closet throw him in the closet oh my God okay okay okay you keep the door closed I'm going to call the cops okay come on please answer please answer 911 what's your emergency oh yes officer we have the crazy lunatic stuck in the closet right now no no no no no no no we've done this too many times tonight no no no no it's true we really have them this time no no it's what you said last time we told you we're not coming over there anymore no no one more time just one more time I promise it's the real crazy lunatic no no no not falling for it bye no no no no what they say junior they said they're not coming cuz there's been too many bad calls that that aren't real what what what do we do now okay how about this how about this how about we invite him to dinner and then we call the cops at dinner so so they arrive at dinner wa Junior you want to invite a serial killer to dinner yeah okay okay open the door stop it stop stop it right now okay how about this how about you go to dinner with us and then we call the cops at wait I'm not telling them not plan hold on hold on tell that hold on you go to dinner with us and you eat the waitress's eyeballs at the at the restaurant yummy eyeballs yeah okay okay okay so you'll come with us yeah okay okay come on welcome to foot long bangers where we put a foot long in your mouth what you want what do you want lunatic oh mybody oh the cops are coming get on you got the wrong guy you got the wrong guy we got the wrong guy but we also got the right guy see look how simil of they look anybody can make that mistake well you got the right guy yeah yeah we were driving back and we just found a munching on a guy's face so we grabbed him okay well at least Cody's free come on Cody yeah well Cody how's it feel to be a free man now feels pretty good Junior tired of being in handcuffs anyway let's check the weather and see if it was going to rain all right let's do it breaking newsuk a crazy lunatic named Junior is on the loose if you see this man please call 911 immediately waa that guy's crazy what uh 911 what get on get on the ground come on SO guys what do you want to do tonight oh dude let's throw rock that cars no Joseph you idiot it's dark outside how would we even see the cars they have headlights dude well that's more of a morning activity but always sleep in I'm going to miss it well you have to get up pretty early in the morning if you want to throw rocks at cars oh fine so guys what do you want to do at night since it's dark o o o ooh I know I know we should watch a scary movie and then whenever I get scared you can hold me and then kiss me and then Caress Me and then just kind of see where it goes from there man I think we should just turn on the TV and see if we can find something fun to watch okay hey there do you love french fries well a new McDonald's location is opening up and if you're the first customer in line you can win free French fries for a year wao free French fries for a year dude that's a lot of fries I'm homeless it'll feed me for like a whole year guys guys guys we should totally go to McDonald's right now to guarantee we're the first people in line oh yeah dude let's totally do it Cody you coming with us no what why come on dude I just don't really like french fries that much oh my God Cody are you literally the lamest person I've ever met I think so dude are you Dr lame In the Flesh Cody why don't you want to wait in line with us well it just doesn't seem worth it to wait in line for hours just for French fries it doesn't seem worth it Cody we could make so much money from this listen listen what are french fries made out of uh potatoes what are mashed potatoes made out of potatoes what are baked potatoes made out of potatoes so we can go to McDonald's get our french fries right our free French fries and then we can go turn them into baked potatoes and sell them you can't bake fried potatoes oh okay Cody then fine we we'll go to McDonald's every day and get 100 free orders of french fries and we'll go around driving around and we'll sell them well no one's going to want to buy cold french fries from your car well we'll turn the heater on well they're still going to be stale and gross no one's going to want them Cody we'll literally be at McDonald's on Wheels yeah a McDonald's that only sells french fries and nothing else well that's the only thing people want is french fries that's why they're giving them out for a year yeah it's not like they're a burger place or anything okay come on Cody at least come stand in line with us okay look I'll tell you what I will stand in line with you but as soon as I get bored I'm going home so what what are the odds that you like say the whole time 0% that's not happening I like that percent yeah the odds are in our favor dude all right guys let's go to McDonald's yeah let's go guys I can't believe it we're first in line of McDonald's oh dude I can't believe it either we're actually first I can't believe it really you can't believe we're the first people to wait in line all night just to get french fries Cody stop being a pout pout fish yeah sour coward what the hell are you talking about Cody you're being all sad and mopy do you not understand we're going to get free French fries for a year 365 days dude yeah that's enough fries to fix your eyes fries that'll tie your tie fries that'll stop your cries fries that'll keep you from being shy shy it was close dude really guys is this what we're going to do for8 hours just make fry Rhymes okay how about we play I spy I spy with my little eye he's wearing glasses he's a dork he's ugly okay you know what I didn't even want to come here you're right it was you oh he's good okay fine you know what I have one I spy with my little eye a colossal waste of my time your life no no okay I have another one I Spy Two idiots who are wasting their night just to wait for French fries oh that's us that's us oh he's good yeah that's right you win okay wait Joseph what stay right here why dude I want to be first no no no I want to be first no no no it was my idea so I get to be first no I was first first no no no I want to be no give my get where you belong wait what do you mean by that dude huh because it was my idea so you got to be right there but no you white people always think you're better than us no no it's my idea to get french fries you can't you don't even want french fries no you know what screw your fries I'm out of here dude oh good leave I don't want you here anyway now you what don't you dare try to skip me I'm not going to skip you I don't care are you sure yes don't you try it I'm not going to try it I have The High Ground I don't care what how much longer do we have to wait about 8 hours damn yeah damn I know 8 hours yeah I'm starting to get tired you want to go home no we need to be first in line to get the fries I'm not yawning I'm just oh my phone's ringing I don't hear anything it's on silent then how did you hear it hold on WR Cody Chef pee's calling me I have to answer it it might be an emergency hello Chef peee yeah it's me Junior what's wrong you sound upset what what why are you yelling you need me to go home right now but but I'm at the McDonald's waiting in line with Cody and really right now okay let me tell Cody Jesus I hope you have Apple Care look Cody I have to go home right now but why because chfp needs me to clean the entire kitchen cuz I spill apple juice everywhere Junior if you're leaving I'm leaving no no no you have to hold our spot in line someone might take it Junior no one's going to take it look around there's no one for Miles well there might be a guy in that bush over there and as soon as we leave our spot he's going to come take our spot in line and then he can get all the free French fries Junior I'm pretty sure nobody else even knows about this damn french fry deal look Cody just just take just just wait right here for 5 minutes if I'm not back at 5 minutes you can leave really no no no I need you to wait the whole time but look look just give me an hour or two but an hour or two Jesus junior did you spill a whole Orchards worth of Apple Juice what's an orchard it's where they grow apples what what it's yeah that's what look just make it quick okay okay just wait right here do not leave don't leave the spot in line I'll be right back okay just just wait right here don't leave no matter what even if someone tries to take a spot don't leave hurry up where the hell is he come on Junior it's been hours okay you know what I'm going to call him come on junior answer hello Junior huh what Junior wait what are you doing wait Cody yes where are you is it french fry time what no it's not french fry time wait then why did you call me because I don't know where you are you were supposed to be back hours ago oh I'm uh I uh I'm still cleaning the orange juice wait wait wait a minute earlier you said it was apple juice huh when you said you had a mes to clean you said it was apple juice oh yeah it's both what what yeah it was um it was was apple juice orange juice grape juice it was a it was a bunch of fruit juices Junior what what Cody what do you want from me what where what where where are you I'm I'm I'm cleaning up the mess well hurry up and come back okay just give me a few minutes to get up from the ground cuz I've been wiping up the juices so much with napkins hold on speaking of napkins Shi can you get me more napkins damn it Junior you you took all the napkins we don't know we can't afford napkins Junior that's the worst Chef Pee PE impression I've ever heard what are you talking about Chef PE PE listen Cody listen I'm let me just get up okay why do you keep saying get up tired from cleaning and I took a quick a quick nap on the floor a nap I'm on my way I'm on my way do not leave the spot okay I'm on my way right now I'm getting look running you don't sound like you're running out of breath Junior huh Junior I'm in the car you're not in the car I'm going through a tunnel there are no tunnels on the way here junior junior hey Cody how you feeling I think I'm dying man I had the best sleep of my life in my nice warm bed yeah I bet you did what's wrong with you I've been standing here for 12 hours junior I'm exhausted no one tried to skip you right no no one else cares no one else is even in line can you please just take my spot so I can go home but I really have to go pee well why didn't you just go at your house because I didn't have to go then look I'm going to go pee in that bush over there well why can't you just wait for them to open and then you can use their bathroom when are they going to open any minute now look I'm going to go pee in the bush just just wait right here you've been waiting all night you can wait one more second just hurry up congratulations boy you're the first one at McDonald's me no no no actually my friend Junior over there peeing in the bush he he was actually first well you're the only one here so you get free French fries for a year no Junior was actually first well get a picture with me boy come here this boy loves his McDonald's I don't actually like it that much well Cody you stole my free for a year no Junior I tried to tell him that why you Thief you Thief you stood here just so you can get the French Fri you knew how much this meant to me Junior I don't even want your damn french fries we're not fries anymore fatty what Junior come on well boy how does it feel to get all those french fries you know what it actually feels pretty good I I want the fries now God I hate Cody so much some friend Junior you're being ridiculous Cody go away I hate you why because I waited 12 hours in lying for you to get your stupid fries no because you took my spot so you could be the first customer I didn't take your spot you had to use the bathroom you made me have to use the bathroom but how you put some weird Voodoo witchcraft spell on my bladder that made me had to go pee at bad times what Junior do you even hear yourself you sound insane Cody you took my spot and you took my French fries look I don't even want the fries take the stupid card no I didn't earn them but yeah we all know that I'm the one who waited 12 hours in line you take that back what what are you talking about that's just a fact you know I couldn't wait in line Chef peipi needed me to clean the whole house okay I know that's [ __ ] what what did Chef tell you I wasn't actually cleaning but no he didn't have to Cody listen I don't want those stupid dumb fries cuz you stole them from me and I want to be able to call you a thief well okay fine then I'll just take the one free medium fry a week for myself what oh you didn't know you don't get unlimited fries for a year you only get one free medium fry a week for one year so it's not all you can eat french fries nope that's gay yeah I know but that's what you get and I'm going to take it well no no actually I I want the Fri no no no no no you said you didn't want the card so now I'm going to take it but it's only one free medium fry you might as well just let me have it no and it's going to be the one best free medium fry in my goddamn life well Cody God I hate you hey there is this your friend that's Joseph yeah I caught him throwing rocks at cars specifically my car while yelling take that you stupid Pig in F12 Joseph dude I told you I was going to do it yeah I'm just going to let him off with the warning this time I'm in a good mood stupid Pig okay I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that did you get your fries dude no Cody stole them from me what yeah yeah me and Cody were waiting in line at McDonald's for the french fries and Cody was like I want to go home I don't want to stand here anymore and I said Cody calm down I'm about to get my French fries and then out of nowhere I start hearing me me it was a baby kitten in the middle of the road and there were cars coming so I said Cody wait right here I'm going to go save this kitten and I ran and Cody was like no don't save the kitten let it die and I said I'm not going to let this kitten die so I go in the middle of the road I grab the kitten I dodge a semi- truck I dodge another truck and I jump and I toss the kitten into a pile of feathers and then and the kitten survives and then I get back in line and Cody had stolen my French fries they thought he was the first customer what a conniving little bastard he is yeah Cody something friend huh H hey guys check out my free medium fry for the week and I didn't even have to pay for it you know cuz it's free you kitten killer what what's he talking about Cody how's your medium fry oh they're so good hold on let me just get one oh yummy fries oh was it worth the life of a kitten though what I don't understand this kitten thing somebody needs to explain that just worry about your stupid french fries Cody yeah why did you only get one though oh you didn't tell him oh you don't get unlimited fries you only get one medium fry a week for a year wait you can't get all the fries you want nope H gay yeah that's what junior said yeah just don't worry about your stupid fries Cody we don't want to be a friend anymore okay fine I'll eat my fries and I'll see you guys next week with my next free medium fry I hate Cody so much yeah I do too okay Joseph what Lego set should we build now um I'm not sure dude hey guys wa that's sick Cody what Lego set should we build uh this one the Pod racer now this is POD racing you remember he says that in the movie wait I'm confused that's Anakin Skywalker yeah and that's Padme uhhuh and they get married yeah but he's a little kid yeah I know it's weird she's a grown woman yeah it's pretty messed up how does that work I I don't know it's kind of gross wait where's your free fry I thought it was Friday oh it is but I decided to give my free fries this week to my hot date Ken no it's someone else get in here hey guys what Penelope I thought you were dating Ken oh I am but what I can't take Penelope on a free medium french fry date Cody's getting me free French fries medium french fries can I get a drink too no I didn't get free medium drinks every week for a year but what if my mouth gets dry well you can quench your thirst with a free medium french fries okay you're so lame Cody yeah well that may be true but I have free medium french fries for a year come on babe let's go let's go with this one okay Joseph what game do you want to play the Oregon Trail or cubert um let's see what Oregon's talking about hey guys happy Friday you're not getting tired of french fries Cody oh no Junior how could I possibly get tired of these delicious free medium french fries you can't hate it when it's free can I have one sure just for $1 per fry what $1 per fry why well cuz I'm selling them like you said I'm starting my own potato company or whatever that only works if you have unlimited french fries well it's kind of like having unlimited except I only get one medium a week for a year but that's still a lot of french fries well I'm not going to buy your stupid french fries Cody why don't you just try to redeem them all at once I don't think they'd let me do that wait would they let me do that hold on I'm going to I'm going to try that I'll play cubert this stupid packaging Joseph I can't open it yeah me either dude hey guys did you get all the french fries no they told me to read the card and the card says one free medium order of fries every week up to a year so I just got to take it one week at a time they wouldn't let you get all the fries just right now nope so I'm just going to have to have one box of medium free fries every week you're really going to get it every single week yes I am every week I'm going to have a box of fries at least once a week no really I'm really going to do that every single week I'm going to have a box of fries with me and if you don't see me with a box of fries at least once a week then you can yell and scream in the comments and be mad at us but I'm going to do it I'm really going to do it yeah we'll see Cody all right class today is Happy St Patrick's Day so if you're not wearing green you get pitched see me I have green pants on so you better not Pitch me or else I beat your ass I have black b t one anyway if you're not wearing green then I give the entire craft permission to pinch you so go who's not wearing green Cody is it Cody is it P pin wait wait wait wait wait I have green on where yeah you got 3 seconds dude uh What uh oh God damn it okay fine you pinched me what about Penelope she's not wearing green uh she has green under her shoes ugly green eyes yeah and the stupid pigtail things yeah what about Jeffy marski oh yeah see Cody you're the only loser who didn't wear green today well I have this green thong at home I just didn't wear it cuz blue is my color well you do know that every 15 seconds you don't wear green get to pinch you what that's not a rule yeah it is now it is pinch them okay that's I'm going home I'm going home oh come on chody don't be a poor sport oh nice one dude I know I just thought of that name man Joseph remember when we pinched Cody today for not wearing green oh yeah dude what a time to be alive yeah I want to pinch him again it's just so fun oh me too why does he always forget to wear green on St Patrick's Day cuz he's an idiot dude what's up homies what the [ __ ] Cody what are you wearing it's murag Snoopy I got tired of getting pinched so I joined a gang you didn't join a gang bro you're not in a gang yeah I am the Gang Green gang we amputate snitches when they get infected with snitch juice that's not a real gang Cody stop lying Cody yeah it is in The Powerpuff Girls we call ourselves the slimes there's the Bloods there's the Crips and wear the slimes they call me key liim slime cuz we're all named after something green there's this guy whose name is slime slime and he's our leader dude I swear to God if you step outside looking like that you're going to get shot nah stop spitting on my wheezys dog what yeah you're totally yanking my bacon back off the road before the commode explodes homie dude get him okay I'm going to pinch you Cody no you can't pinch me cuz I I'm greener than a than a pasture or some [ __ ] ow ow stop it ow you can't pinch me what are you going to do call your slimes yeah that's exactly what I'm going to do that that's the Slime call they must be busy sliming around somewhere well I'm going to go slime walk home what's a slime walk well it's where you slide on your ass like a snail like Gary from SpongeBob dude what the hell is wrong with him he's just so weird hopefully now they'll never pinch me again for not wearing green skinky dinky ding skinky Doo I love dudes oh look a kitty cat wrong neighborhood essay excuse me what this is casr territory you and want to get C Crush fever oh this no no no no I'm not really in a gang see it's just St Patrick's Day and I have to wear green so I don't get pinched so you're telling me since I'm not wearing your colors you're going to pin me oh oh no I would never Hey cuz what you doing on my block this [ __ ] territory but Dad this is cat territory oh I told your [ __ ] ass last time this is my block get off it you're barking up the wrong tree G oh man swear to God I put a bullet in your ass right now puty T i' like to see you thy guys guys stop yanking each other's Bacons this is slime territory blood game [ __ ] ow got yeah what's wrong slimy what happened to your green bandan I got jumped by a bunch of gangs on the way home see I told you yeah we said that was going to happen well I'm never going to join a gang again Junior what was that for you're not wearing green anymore damn it I'm tired of this not wearing green crap okay fine how about this what if I I got a green tattoo would that count yeah I mean you'd always have green on you we couldn't pinch you okay yeah I'll do that I'll get like a fourleaf clover tattoo to my hand hey guys I'm back Cody why do you look like the Incredible Hulk more like the incredible dork okay well I went to the tattoo shop to get my fourleaf Clover tattoo on my hand and it looked like [ __ ] and the guy said it would be really painful to get it removed so I said you know what just do my entire body make me completely green that's the solution yeah so now every St Patrick's Day you guys better watch out cuz you can't pinch me anymore whatever you say dude did it hurt to get your whole body tattooed oh it was the most excruciating pain I've ever felt in my life but hey I'm green I'm green D you know like the like the like the blue song Cody we're just trying to watch the news the news breaking news the president of the United States is holding an emergency press conference let's go to that now my fellow Americans today is St Patrick's day I was pinched for not wearing green and that really cheesed me off so I'm making the color green illegal if you are caught wearing the color green you will be sentenced to 30 years in prison the color Green's illegal but my shorts are green my whole outfit is green uh guys uhoh what's wrong Cody uh Earth to Junior my whole body's green oh my God it is green what are you going to do Cody I don't know Junior I'm illegal I didn't know you were Mexican what no Junior I mean I'm green oh so you're an illegal alien what no Junior shut up I mean I can be arrested because of the color of my skin join the club it's been happening for years no no I mean like this is really important oh my people ain't important come on now my people ain't important but no I just mean like right now this just happened so please hide me oh hide you like in an underground railroad what no Junior shut up I don't know what I'm going to do uh well I don't know what you're going to do but me and Joseph need a change our clothes so we don't get arrested yeah all right Joseph this is going to have to be our outfits from now on yeah dude I chose a yellow shirt with my name on it because I thought it would be original and unique right yeah I don't think anyone's everever done that before hey Cody what are you going to do about your outfit well if I just wear this every day for the rest of my life I guess I'll be fine Cody why are you wearing all that well this is the only outfit I could find that would cover up all the green and I'm going to be honest Junior it's pretty goddamn hot in this outfit so could you please be a gentleman and turn on your AC Cody why are you wearing a football helmet the the Spider-Man mask should cover your face well see that's the thing Junior for some reason the Spider-Man mask leaves my ears exposed so I'm going to have to keep this stupid football helmet on I still see your ear God damn it is that better yeah okay I don't see any green right now Cody you can't wear that every day for the rest of your life well I'm going to have to until they hopefully change the law there someone at the door I'll get it hello hey there random green inspection random green inspection yeah ever since they made the color green illegal I now have a warrant to come into anyone's house and find things that are green well there's nothing green what the [ __ ] is that what that right there what is this what is this some kind of green plant get the [ __ ] out of here what what plants are illegal now and that lawn you have out there going to have to tear that up only dirt Lawns are allowed I don't even know what the hell we're going to do about trees so everything that's green is illegal everything even if I pick my nose and have a booger on my don't don't say that word please what booger yeah yes that word don't say it but booger is not a bad word godamn it hey Brooklyn guy did you miss me oh you're wearing your cop outfit big strong man a manly man a ladies man I bet you're getting late T night yeah probably not booger oh Brooklyn guy at St Patrick's Day and you're not wearing green pin booger actually you know what the color green is illegal now so I think I can arrest you oh you wouldn't arrest your best power Booker oh I mean I wouldn't but you know I have to cuz it's my job yeah you're right you're the manliest man ever you're the man that does what he wants so you you can arrest me yeah I I will be doing that who you you talking to oh this is my imaginary friend booger I I I know you can't see him but he's annoying as all hell and he imps anytime anybody says the word booger three times hey who's this weird horn kid like you can't hear him but he just called you a weird horn kid which to be fair he has a point like why do you have horns I don't know huh hey Brooklyn guy are you going to arrest this guy too I mean I might if he has green in his house oh I hope you find some green on him oh you know what booger I have an idea how about you go outside and you count everything you see that's green oh that's a great idea Booker guy I'll go do that cuz you're the man you're the man man yeah I know get to count oh God he's so annoying okay so I'm going to come in and look for if you had anything two 3 4 booger booger what are you doing I'm telling everything GRE outside just like you said okay how about this booger you see that yard way the hell over there oh yeah yeah go count every blade of grass in that yard okay I'll do that oh Jesus I'm coming in who's at the door Junior it was the cops what are the cops doing here they're looking for green dude hide my weed all right right random green check just looking for anything oh my God it's Spider-Man I know you're trying to hide with that football helmet and Harley jacket but I just want to say I'm a huge fan wait a minute which Spider-Man are you Toby Maguire Andrew Garfield Tom Holland huh uh none of those I'm the Miles Morales Spider-Man oh really well you got any drugs on you boy dude get used to it it's a skin issue but no no no no no I'm not actually Spider-Man okay not Spider-Man aren't you only here to look for green things yeah that's true and I don't see any Anything Green so I guess you guys are in the clear what the [ __ ] get on the ground you're under arrest what I do this what Junior what's he see uh your back's exposed and it's green oh damn it all right you're not actually Miles Morales so let's see who you really are oh my God it's Spider-Man I'm such a big fan you already did that oh that's right so let's see who you really are you're not actually Spider-Man you're the Incredible Hulk but which Hulk are you are you Eric bner huh Ed Norton huh Mark Ruffalo uh Eric bner wrong answer you're going to jail well actually you're you're going to court and then you're going to jail what was the right answer Mark Ruffalo come on we have to do something Joseph dude what are we going to do order order order order order Cody you are being accused of wearing the color green although I can see you actually are green so you're obviously guilty but you are guilty of wearing the color green after the color green was made illegal no so how do you explain your greenness uh well you see your honor I I had my entire body tattooed green cuz I was tired of people pinching me on St Patrick's Day and then they passed a law making the color green illegal so so that's that's what happened h i see it's a tattoo and you had the tattoo before the law so I can sentence you to 30 years in prison what a shame ooh I know I order you to get the tattoo removed with excruciatingly painful lasers excruciatingly painful lasers uhoh ow oh God it burns ow ow ow ow ow ow ooh ow ow ouch owie yikes jez are you okay Cody Junior that tattoo removal was the most excruciating experience of my entire life did it hurt yes Junior I just said it hurt don't you know how they get rid of tattoos they burn them off with a laser that's like 1,000° that's a lot of college what you going to do with all that knowledge oh God they burned my skin Cody why are your eyes red oh cuz the blood vessels in my eyes burst from all the pain I was in and then I tried to lick the laser cuz I thought it looked tasty and then it burned my tongue see and then when they were burning my scalp all my hair just fell out so that's why I don't have any hair wait a minute you're the Cody from the chip challenge video sh no no no no I'm not no so Cody did you learn your lesson yeah I learned that I probably should have just bought a green shirt and not tattooed my entire body yeah so anyway pipe down Cody we're trying to watch the news the news oh no I'm in too much pain breaking news UK the president of the United States is holding another emergency press conference let's go to that now my fellow Americans I realized the law I passed earlier to Outlaw the color green was pretty silly so I am now making the color green legal again but I'm introducing a new law that it is now illegal to pinch the president wow Cody you got that tattoo lasered off for no reason what' you say son of a [ __ ] that was son of a [ __ ] in Spanish all right CR today we're going to be learning about black holes black holes can suck up anything nothing can escape a black hole how you think my wife got pregnant hey Cody your mom has three black holes cuz she's a hoe and you have a black dad guys guys don't bully me today hey dude you want a piece of gum yeah sure Joseph teacher Joseph's chewing gum in class Cody you snitch Joseph no chewing gum and crust spit it out fine teacher Joseph did you just spit gum in my hair yeah my bad dude I didn't mean to do that what do you mean you didn't mean to you spit it right at me I couldn't find the trash can God you didn't even try teacher can I go to the clinic I have gum in my hair how you get that in your hair what the hell You' been doing in class weirdo oh you said gum you you can go to the clinic thank you God I hate you guys Joseph I think you really made Cody upset he'll get over it dude hey Joseph have you heard from Cody no dude not since you went to the clinic earlier I hope he's okay yeah hey jerks oh hey Cody what's up buddy oh you still have the gum in your hair oh you still have the gum in your hair yeah I know I do not sound like that Cody why don't you just pull it out dude yeah why don't you just grab it oh G is I hadn't thought of grabbing it it doesn't come out well why don't you take a shower and try to wash it out I've tried that too Junior gum is sticky well it says online all you have to do is put toothpaste in your hair and the gum will come out huh I I hadn't thought of that oh Joseph grab some toothpaste okay I'm on it right now dude I got it all right start putting on Cody's head okay well I think we should put a towel down in case it drips off his face I've heard that one before I'll go get the towel yeah okay the towel is down I'm ready Daddy ah why do you have your mouth open oh sorry it's just a habit okay I'm ready now all right Joseph put the toothpaste on his head okay dude there we go well how does it look now you have pink and blue on your head it's like a gender reveal what gender are you we can't assume it what guys now I even I have an even bigger mess on my head well at least a pigeon didn't poop on it yeah you'll be in trouble then do you what guys what do we do about the gum okay look why don't we go ask Chef peee how to get gum out of your hair cuz look he he works with food all the time so he probably gets food in his hair all the time yeah no he has the opposite problem he gets hair in his food tomato potato Let's go ask him okay M this mac and cheese is going to be so good hey Chef peipe what are you doing I'm cooking mac and cheese Junior wait what's on Cody's face that was a Natty little Smurf and he has gum in his hair what yeah he has gum in his hair look oh oh gum yes so how do we get gum out of his hair it's stuck oh it's an easy fix all you have to do is stick your hair in this boiling water in the gum with this ingrate I can't put my head in boiling water it'll burn my head not your head your hair you idiot just your hair in the water yeah yeah look I I'll hold you so you don't fall in uh okay yeah look you want that gum out of your hair right uh look look look oh my phone's ringing I am so sorry Cody Junior you dropped me in boiling water my phone was ringing well now I have third degree burns all over my face look at the bright side Cody now you can play as Deadpool you know cuz his face is all ugly yeah I get it or Darth Vader yeah Darth Vader cuz Darth Vader's face is all burned and ugly yeah okay I get it or Darth Maul cuz his face is all red and scary okay great are there any other horribly disfigured people I look like o Freddy Krueger yeah Freddy Krueger cuz his face is all burned and ugly yeah yeah cool couldn't forget about him yeah wait there's still gum in your hair Cody you know what just just shave it off I don't even care anymore oh I've been waiting for you to say it dude all right shave it shave it and done oh you are one ugly freak if I do say show myself mhm I really love how it's just bully me day hey Cody look down hey Joseph look the top of Cody's head looks like the stains in my underwear he doesn't white yeah there it is so look Cody look at least the gum's not in your hair anymore so when your hair goes back it'll be beautiful yeah but my face won't your face was never beautiful Cody you had all those pimples and look those Burns really distract from the pimples on your face yeah that's great I just don't know what my parents are going to say when I go home well you don't have to go home you can stay here as long as you want your parents will never know who's that hello is Cody here his black butt better be here uh yeah he's upstairs oh thank God we were tracking him we put a microchip in him at the vet yeah it only cost $50 I know the veterinarian personally she got ass for days it's true she does and if I was a dog I would beg for her to put me down every night put me down like a baby goo go got gut well Cody's upstairs oh good cuz we need to talk to him I have to spank his little tushy for not coming home and for not eating his brussels sprouts last night [ __ ] yeah that's right it's a waste of Brussels sprout yeah he think we playing about them brussels sprouts no no we ain't playing oh okay well Cody's upstairs okay all right Cody's right here junior what are my parents doing here Cody what happened to your face and why didn't you eat your brussel sprouts last night boy okay first of all brussels sprouts are gross you better watch your damn mouth before I make your face ugli than it already is but Cody what about your face well my face fell into some boiling water that's not how you Bob for apples boy you don't Bob in boiling water you bobing regular water you crazy I wasn't bobbing for apples then why you sticking your head and boiling water stupid well if you would just let me finish I was going to say I was trying to get gum out of my hair that's not how you get gum out your hair you don't stick your head in boiling water you go to the gas station for gum what no no no I was trying to get the gum out of my hair W jump in the shower if it's in your hair boy Mom are you getting any of this Cody you look hideous we should call a doctor but Mom we can't call a doctor Pablo doesn't have three arms I mean I know he's gorgeous he's immensely talented and he's basically carrying the channel at this point but there's no way he could play all three characters at the same time yeah Cody you're right I'll go home so the doctor can come hey there some somebody call a doctor ugly ugly burn face bald is what you are I'm sorry look I got fired from the burn unit at the hospital cuz I just can't handle ugly or gross and you're both well his face got like that cuz he put his face in boiling water oh is that what happened I thought he was trying to Bob her french fries in the grease see that's what I thought see he was bobbing for something he was bobing for something how do we fix his face oh well there's three things we can do one we could find a magical genie lamp and wish for his face not to look so ugly or two we could try to get a time machine and then go back in time to before he put his face in the boiling water and then stop him from doing that or three we could put some bandages on his face so we just don't have to look at him anymore woo let's go with that one that one sound cheaper yeah let's do with that okay I'll get the bandages and done oh my go I did it your good as new nobody would ever suspect that you're a horribly disfigured burnac bald freak you look like a mommy Boy Thanks Dad anyway my work here is done in rings just don't go putting your face in hot water anymore I'm going to go home and make sure your mama making brussel sprouts and not on that damn computer sorry about all this happening Cody I almost feel like it's our fault but it is you guys's fault Joseph put gum in my hair and you dropped me in boiling water see like that's why I kind of feel like it's our fault so look we'll make it up to you we'll do anything you want yeah I'm sorry dude okay I can tell you how you'll make it up to me you guys are going to play Magic the Gathering with me a that sounds like a nerd game yeah for losers and dumb people yeah it is and I want to play it so you're going to take me to the store and you're going to buy me a deck of cards okay I'm going to stay here dude all right Junior this is the one you really going to make us play Magic the Gathering Cody yes now buy it can I help you with something oh yeah we want this oh my God it's a robber I'm not a robber but you're wearing a ski mask it's not a ski mask these are bandages I'm calling the cops all right you're under arrest what do you mean you just saw me you put the bandages here yeah tell it to the judge criminal I am so sorry for arresting you and did you just take my hat you little rascal no I see it right there in your hand know I could have you arrested for that but I won't cuz I'm a fun cop today anyway I'm really sorry for what that guy did to you in the holding cell well I'm not really mad about that I'm just mad you arrested me well you do kind of look like a robber with those bandages on your face what don't touch me don't ever touch me I'm in cop mode I'll break your arm well I was wondering but maybe you could just do a face transplant like you give him a new face a face transplant you mean like the Texas Chainsaw Massacre that'd be sick yeah I can do a face transplant that looks like a job for Dr man wait you can really do a face transplant on Cody yeah sure let's do it so guys how do I look oh my God oh my God you guys Jesus what did I do I'm a monster uh where'd you get the face from somebody died in a car accident and they donated it but now I want to give it back so how do I look oh god oh come on guys I don't look that bad do I what no no I look okay right but show me what what the hell is that what oh my God is that me oh my God that's me get it off I don't want it anymore oh my god get it off me Cody Cody Maybe maybe you'll grow into it eventually right really you think I'll grow into it well nobody at school's going to notice right hopefully not okay oh my bad dude I just had to throw up yeah I think he ate some bad food earlier right not not cuz of my face though right oh no buddy okay I'm just going to go I see you tomorrow dude yeah yeah see you at school tomorrow Cody okay okay yeah yeah nobody's going to notice I feel confident enough to go to school now yep yep so you can leave I I don't want to look at you anymore okay hey guys dude you scared me oh I'm sorry oh I forgot to bring a pencil hey Penelope can I borrow a pencil sure Cody she must have stabbed her finger with the pencil or something Joseph can I borrow a pencil oh man Joseph must have a stomach bug hey Junior can I bub a pencil um yeah yeah sure I don't have one okay all right craft today we are doing yearbook pictures so I hope you work your best today yearbook pictures oh no I have a stain on my shirt now my picture's going to be ruined oh that's what's going to ruin [Music] it what's wrong Junior I want to eat cereal but we're all out of milk and I don't want to eat Dry Cereal well don't worry Junior I got a machine right here that I'll fix it what's the machine called it's called a brush pump you put this little thing right here over your nipple and it sucks the milk out there's milk in our nipples it sure is Junior it's called the infinite milk glitch they just haven't patched it yet that's so cool yeah Junior what type of bees make milk what boobies I let's get this thing started put this under my shirt my nipple and let's Crank It Up all the way full blast oh yeah oh I'm almost there is it popping the milk out oh yeah hey guys what are you doing oh we're pumping milk for my cereal what you know with the milk pump what but that's not going to work they patched it what they patched the infinite milk glitch no only girls can make milk with their boobs a girls get all the fun they get periods and milk but we can make yogurt but not from our nipples what's that Cody oh I'm glad you asked behold the hot potion is it hot no it's like lukewarm what's it do oh well you know how you're always making fun of me because of my acne and my teeth and my glasses and my hair yeah it's all ugly yeah exactly well this is going to fix all that it's going to clear up my acne make my teeth white get rid of my glasses and make my hair beautiful well then hurry up and drink it go well see that's the problem I need my key ingredient which is a horseshoe crab blood well go to the beach and grab a crab I don't want to go all the way down to the beach H there's sand everywhere and it gets in my shoes and my butt crack and then I get to put on sunscreen because I don't want to get a sunburn but then I always miss a spot and get a sunburn anyway and then I'm sticky and I smell like sunscreen and then I'm all tired when I come home and I have to take a shower it's just I don't want to go go through all that well why don't you just buy some crab blood well it's like $60,000 a gallon oh why is it so expensive well because because if the horseshoe crab blood comes in contact with the air it becomes useless so you got to take it out of the horseshoe crab without it being exposed to the air boring science okay well long story short I need horseshoe crab blood well I'm going to watch some TV TV okay hello I am Dr friederick fingle shits and today I will show you my newest invention the cure for the flu all kinds if you take my cure you will never get the flu again now I have created it from horseshoe crab blood sea monkey piss Mercury and just a little hint of crushed up caterpillar and this is a martini I have made for me to celebrate yes so I have combined these ingredients to create my cure I will now inject myself with the flu so that I can test out my cure yes get in me flu oh yes oh that's good flu oh yummy that is what daddy likes okay now I oh my God holy [ __ ] that I have given my myself AIDS this was the AIDS needle I meant to grab the flu needle why why is the AIDS needle here I clearly labeled it so this wouldn't happen Okay well I don't have a cure for AIDS just the flow so I guess I will get to work on the AIDS cure now my name is Dr Fredick fle [ __ ] and I have the AIDS Junior you see that yeah he got AIDS but no I mean that's very sad but no he has horseshoe crab blide oh this is you need yes that's my missing ingredient Junior I think we should go steal the horseshoe crab blood from Dr fleed Cody that's impossible he like he we worked in a laboratory with guns and robots and security no junior he lives in his mom's basement it wouldn't be that hard oh he does yeah okay well I mean if you want to go try to steal it we can yeah let's go steal it so I can be hot all right let's go guys okay this is Dr fle shit's house hello uh is Dr fle shits here oh yes I am his mother he's down in the basement I think he gave himself AIDS oh well can we go see him oh yes come right in make yourselves home uh Cody I don't think this is a good idea Junior just shut up and don't touch anything I need this horseshoe grab blood well hurry up and grab it I wonder what this does Jeffy don't touch anything okay which one is it guys I told you not to touch anything who knows what kind of chem reaction you could have caused maybe you made poison gas that killed Dr finle ships and his mom and she was hot too you thought his mom was hot yeah I mean I'm gay but I'd pipe what Cody why are you so ugly that's what I'm telling you Junior that's why I need the Potion No you're uglier than usual really what oh damn it I must have dropped my glasses when I was running away wait when did you get a blue couch Cody it's a red couch oh oh man I forgot I'm colorblind when I'm not wearing my glasses I did grab the right potion right this is the blue [Music] one I just had a chemical reaction in my pants okay ignore me then it's fine I know I grabbed the right one this is the blue one you don't have to tell me I already know it's blue totally blue don't even have to tell me it's blue I know I'm just going to add a little dash of the blue one but correct me if I'm wrong though guys just a little bit of the blue all right that'll do just enough blue now you guys ready for me to be hot yeah okay cheers h how's it taste it's kind of minty there's kind of a nougaty sort of flavor you what happened I can't see your eyes like they blew off and your stomach's coming out come doctor hold on there's something I want to do what are you doing put that there what is that that right there Cody can you see no I can't see what' he do he added googly eyes but I don't want googly eyes I want realize God damn it call a doctor call a doctor my hey there somebody call a doctor yeah my eyes Okay rude I was in the middle of talking we use our inside voices here my eyes get blowned off okay who shot this kid in the face with a shotgun who Kurt cobaine this boy well he actually did it to himself oh so he did Kurt cobaine himself no I drank a potion what a potion what are you Harry Potter you're not Harry Potter knock it off no the potion's right here who kid what is in this well I just combined parrot piss with nitroglycerin and a little bit of horseshoe crab blood huh well those all seem like perfectly normal ingredients to me I don't know why you face would have blown off yeah well the hardest thing to get was the horseshoe crab blood it's over there in that blue vial well I don't see a blue vial I see a red vial the vial is red right here not red you didn't tell me it was red what does red mean well red means that it's Mercury not horseshoe crab blood what kid you can't combine Mercury with parrot piss and nitroglycerin that makes a very powerful head bomb no wonder your face blew off well what do I do doctor well I have some googly eyes out in my car no I want realiz well can't you give them like an eye transplant well yeah I mean I guess I can go back to the hospital and see if anybody died who can donate their eyes yeah do that okay I'll be right back all right I'm back I actually have a few options for you so uh this one Maniac tried to claw his eyes out cuz he thought they were gumballs and he wanted to eat them but I have those here if you want to try them just really tuck those in there uh let's see the other one in there all right I think that's good well how do they look oh I I think they're going to yeah they're going to fall out okay yeah let's not do those well Mr Potato Head also tragically died earlier and we have his eyes let's stick that in there wa I can actually see how do they look Junior okay well how do they look doc uh they they look great yes they they look they look totally fine yeah so if that's all see you wouldn't want to be you punk that sounded cool all right great I feel much better now what what well guys what do you want to do now I feel good Cody you cannot be happy looking like that why not because you look like a freak you look like a muppet but I have my eyesight back but you look like a weirdo like you don't want to make a potion to fix yourself no no no no I'm all done making potions that doctor was right I'm not Harry Potter I'll leave mixing chemicals to Walter White from Breaking Bad Cody there has to be a potion to fix yourself well there is one potion I can make but the ingredients are very difficult to find what are the ingredients well I would need piss from a blue whale okay we get your mom to pan a that's easy yeah and then I need blood from an angry silverback gorilla why does that to be angry well because it has increased cortisol levels in its blood otherwise it won't work so I need that and then I would also need atine which can only be found in the Earth's crust and it is the most rare substance on Earth okay let's go find all that stuff Junior that sounds very time consuming and very hard to film and I'll be honest it is like 3:12 in the morning man we've been going all day well like are you trying to say that you want us to like Snap our fingers and like it cuts to us having all the stuff we need I mean yeah kind of but Cody the fans are going to call us lazy you know we can only do that one time a year and get away with it yeah I guess it is February and we still have the whole year in front of us yeah [ __ ] it let's do it snap them fingers okay all right Cody we got all your ingredients yeah I told you it was going to be hard I'm exhausted yeah me too remember how we had to rent a drill tank and drill down to the Earth core and fight off the mole people just to get a few drops of atine yeah yeah that was crazy and then we had to fight off that angry silverback gorilla oh he was so angry and the only way you got him to bleed was stab him with chopsticks that you got from the Chinese restaurant down the street yeah yeah I do remember that actually that was nuts yeah yeah and then your mom peed in this cup and that's how we got her pee that that's not what happened Junior We Got The Magic School Bus for Miss Frizzle and then we went inside the bladder of a blue whale to collect its pee and Miss Frizzle was a real [ __ ] too not like on TV but these are really just for show I actually already went ahead and mixed it up so I'm just going to take a little sieron of this hey whoa I'm back to normal I guess it works well I guess that's the end of the video SML question I hate school me too dude come on guys cheer up school's great you get to be around your friends and learn new things these are the best years of Our Lives Jeffy hit them ow well the bus is coming hopefully it runs you over yeah darn it didn't hit you Cody maybe next time dude let's get on the bus ooh look a quarter hey I got a quarter ow hey my arms cut the door open the door open the door all right is everyone on the bus uh yeah I don't think we're missing anybody where's Cody I think he's sick all right let's go to school the I the you guys hear that screaming you hear too oh I always hear a voice in my head screaming kill everybody I thought it was just me what I think it's coming from outside Cody what are you doing outside the bus you're supposed to ride inside it Cody I tell him to stop the bus okay I'll tell him to stop hey stop the bus I'm not stopping the bus we got to go to school you're dragging Cody I'm not dragging anything go back to your seat I think I just hit dinner ring Ring's going to be happy she does have to cook tonight hold on crft let me go pick up my dinner is it cat is it dog I hope it's cat oh no I am so fired man kid you're lucky to be alive you get hit by a bus most people don't survive that but you did and I I think that's just neat hey Cody hey dude thanks for coming guys ow never mind it was a fly didn't want it to bite you yeah that fly was really going to hurt me how you feeling Cody oh I feel just peachy Junior you know I feel like I got run over by a boss oh I know what you're talking about when I have the flu I feel just like that right but I actually did get run over by a eyes we know Cody stop bragging about it stop being dramatic yeah you're making your whole identity ooh I always the iy got ran over by a bus we know guys my life sucks no it doesn't yes it does Junior I got hit by a bus what would you rather got hit by a train or a bus ooh tricky question well I guess if I get hit by a train I would have died so I'll take the bus see look you got hit by what you wanted what I didn't choose this yes you did I said a bus or a train you chose a bus Junior if I could move I'd hit you Cody tell your friends to leave it's time to insert your catheter no I want them to watch what's a catheter it's a needle that goes in your pee hole ew hell yeah it is and I want the man to do it it's hot um you know what actually on second thought you don't even need a catheter you're you're ready to be discharged you can go home now I can't believe you were hit by that bus you know if you were to sue the school you'd make a lot of money but but yeah yeah it's a good idea I'm going to sue this school ow Junior why well there's a fly what how many flies are there in this goddamn Hospital wa you said you're going to sue the school yes I'm going to sue the school because they own the school bus now I'm going to sue them okay uh do you want us to pick you up and take you home yeah just drag me home the flyow he flies just put me down gentle ow so Cody how much money you going to sue the school for I was thinking $5 million $5 million you're asking for a lot dude that's a lot of gravy yeah well my insides are mashed potatoes from where the bus ran me over and besides I need that money for my pain and suffering and I didn't even get my catheter so what's the point aren't you just happy to be alive no I want money Cody let's play basketball I bet you'll feel better after that I can't why cuz I'll beat you huhuh go ahead and say it admit it it's because I'm in a full body cast and I can't move well you guys if you need me I'm going to be on the basketball court Duncan I think you're just scared Cody Junior there's someone at the door can can you go get it Junior I'm in a full body cast but I have an ingrown toenail and it hurts Junior okay fine I'll get it hello is Cody here yeah his tracker isn't working we put a tracker in his booty and it went offline a few hours ago and we paid good money for that tracker so tell me where our son is if he took that Tracker out I'm going to be one mad mama bear you know what I think it's pretty racist that they call black bears black bears because the color of they fur and they call White bears polar bears we should sign a petition to call polar bears Cracker Barrels I think there's a restaurant called that no that's Cracker Barrel baby oh and that's pretty racist too I think we need a black Barrel well Cody's upstairs well we're coming in yeah here's Cody oh my God Cody my baby what happened to you you better I ain't got beat up by no girl cuz if you did I'mma laugh at you huh no I got run over by a bus oh my God Cody I told told you those cartoons were dangerous that Miss Frizzle and her Magic School Bus are a bad influence why didn't you look both ways before crossing the street you know you're supposed to be like the chicken that cross the road I did look both ways I just got caught in the door of the bus then it dragged me around for a while before running me over excus is excuses Cody said he's going to sue the school for $5 million he what now baby I didn't know you gave birth to a cow a cash cow well I mean she's a big fat cow so obviously she'd give birth to a cow Cody we're going to sue the school and then we're going to take this to the news and you're going to going to buy mommy some new cans and I'm going to get un snip you going to have a little brother come on Cody let's go get you the best lawyer we can so I reviewed your case so what do you think what do I think I'll tell you you mind holding this for me for a second oh yeah sure thank you I think it's going to be a slam dump you guys are about to get paid I'm going to win no matter what I can go into the courtroom with my wiener in my hand and I'd still win please do you know what I think I might order order order order order I am The Honorable Jorge Boer and today we will be hearing the case of Cody nkis versus the U Dum Elementary School Cody is suing the school for five million for running him over with a school bus plaintiff proceed with your proceedings thank you your honor ladies and gentlemen of the Court imagine this your your son just got done eating breakfast and he waves goodbye Bye Mom bye Dad I'm on my way to school he walks out the door and walks to the bus stop he finally gets there and he's waiting for the bus to arrive and out of nowhere bam he gets hit by a bus and he's left on the side of the road to die look he looks like a mummy and he was left on the side of the road crying for his mummy ladies and gentlemen of the court I'm done with my proceedings boohoo boohoo a very sad story indeed defendant how do you defend your actions oh it's my turn okay man don't worry I'm going to win this case in my opening statement ladies and gentlemen of the Court my client is clearly Chinese a simple eye test will show that and being Chinese he's you know unfamiliar with American traffic laws but you know Chinese Japanese dirty knes look at these we're all human we all make mistakes you know so what if he does make joke and pee pee in your Coke I think he still deserves a second chance at the American dream I rest my case h i see plaintiff how do you respond guilty we are not at that part yet how do you respond to what he said oh well here is a photograph of my client before he was hit by a bus just look at him a normal ugly looking child and now look at him a hideous freaking nature unrecognizable looking like that he will never get married and he'll never have a job but $5 million will make him very rich because women love money I'm gay men love money too that's all I have to say I agree we all love money defendant defend oh yeah well I can use pictures too uh ladies and gentlemen of the Court can you tell me what this is oh those are egg rolls that's right these are egg rolls and this is what my client ate on the day he ran over the kid Now ladies and gentlemen can you tell me what ingredients are in egg rolls H anybody well neither can I so how do we know that the ingredients of this egg roll did not cause my client to not realize that he was dragging a kid on his school bus for Miles while he yelled for help and then run him over hm we don't know that which is why I think we should be investigating the egg roll company huh how do we know the EG roll company doesn't have some kind of chemical in there that that that causes memory loss that could have caused this to happen hm actually my wife ring ring made the egg rolls from scratch okay well his wife made the egg rolls but I think we should investigate his wife how do we know this wasn't intentional maybe she took out an insurance policy on him and was hoping he crashed his bus H I think we should look into that so suck it suck it ladies and gentlemen H very good points H plaintiff m continue with your plain toing your honor my client is suffering from irreversible physical and psychological damage he is afraid of school buses something I like to call School Bus aphobia allow me to demonstrate all right Cody just like we practice see he screamed at the very top of his lungs at the sight of a school bus something that is supposed to carry him safely to and from school how was my client supposed to get a quality education if he's afraid of school buses ah I rest my case your owner that is very troubling to see that will be very hard to defend against defendant but I dare you to try oh man I am sweating bullets I uh I didn't print out any other pictures but uh hey can I borrow that picture of that bus thank you ladies and gentlemen do you see this bus this is not a picture of the bus that ran over the plaintiff this is a stock photo of a bus so why would he scream at a stock photo he should only scream at a picture of the real bus so I think he's faking it I think he doesn't have any injuries I mean obviously he has physical injuries but I think he doesn't have any psychological injuries you know I knew somebody who got run over by a bus and he didn't [ __ ] about it this much I I mean he died but your honor I object on the grounds that the plaintiff is being a little [ __ ] about this whole thing he should just be happy he's alive I agree he is lucky to be alive plaintiff it is your Tiff to plaint your honor I would like to call a witness it's one of Cody's friends who was there that day and saw the whole thing Junior do you mind coming up here please what do I do could you just tell us everything that happened the day that Cody was hit by a bus yeah so we were all getting on the bus and Cody thought it would be cute to like ride under the bus and hang on to it like a monkey but no I didn't I got stuck in the door well look all I saw is when I looked out the window he was hanging on to the bus screaming wee look at me no I was saying help me stop the bus well he talked about this for weeks before he did it I object to my own witness get the hell out of here why did we even call him in here I don't know I thought he was my friend H how incriminating defendant do your thing no no no no hold on I want his witness I want to talk to you what's up well you said he did all this on purpose I mean he had to why else would it be underneath the bus while it was moving I mean he had plenty of time to get on when we all got on no I was picking up a quarter I found on the ground and my arm got caught in the door aha he was bending over to pick up a quarter off the ground this just shows that he was in it for the money all along who even bends over to pick up a quarter huh who even uses quarters they're worthless this shows he was so desperate for money and that's why he's asking for such an egregious amount I also asked him would he rather get hit by a train or a bus and he chose bus aha he chose this my client was simply doing what he was asked to do M this is getting juicy plaintiff I can't wait to hear your response your honor are you really going to believe this crap no one really wants to be hit by a bus let's look at the facts here my client was hit by a bus and the driver was Chinese I would like to call in one more witness to the case the client's mother Judy do you mind coming up here please oh the judge is hot all right listen to me Focus you are Cody nut kiss's mother correct I think so after he was born and they took him to the nursery all the babies fell over and there was just a big pile of babies and they said take one and go home so I did but I'm pretty sure he's mine okay now ask Cody's mother is this what you wanted for your child to be brutally struck down in the street by a bus oh no I thought it would always be way cooler if he died in a plane crash then there'd be a whole news article about it see your honor not what the client's mother wanted oo that judge is really hot can I go home with you motion granted yes daddy Cody wins yes yes I won I got $5 million I did it I did oh come on that that's not fair I I have a wife you can have her if we can win I'm sorry man I tried oh it's okay you want to come back to my house my wife's making EG rolls hell yeah so I won your court case you are the best lawyer ever I know well technically my mom won the case because she slept with the judge and she should he a very beautiful man well the good news is the $5 million has already cleared my bank account and after removing necessary court fees and my attorney fees this is what you're left with what a quarter wait we supposed to get millions well let me break it down for you so my consultation fee is $2 million my attorney retainer fee is $1 million and my court fees are another $2 million so that Aid up your $5 million you should be lucky you're even getting this quarter but I get hit by a bus well you also got hit with court fees hey do you mind holding this up for me again oh sure hold swish so guys what do you want to do tonight I don't know dude I'm hungry yeah Junior what's for dinner yeah I need some grub grub in my tummy you hear that tummy we about to get some grub Junior please tell me you have some grub for Joseph's tummy well I I think I have some cereal downstairs you want to eat some cereal cereal Junior cereal is a breakfast food you can't have breakfast for for [ __ ] dinner you crazy psycho against the rules dude it's not it's not against the rules oh yes it is look right here in the eat handbook um let's see uh uh uh it's right there see rule 1,746 th'll shalt not eat breakfast foods for dinner time especially not bacon eggs pancakes and cereal oh guys what if we don't follow the rules what if we did it anyway Junior you naughty naughty boy ooh I feel so dirty and not because I don't wipe come on guys let's just eat one bowl of cereal but Junior what if the food police catch us snap out of it Cody the food plates are not going to catch us they're too busy solving crimes like how does RB still have customers let's go eat some cereal this is so good hey Chef peipi oh Junior you're just in time for dinner ew what is that it's spinach tomato pizza spinach Tomatoes good for my Dum yeah exactly spinach tomato pizza why couldn't you just make regular pepperoni pizza I'm trying to cook healthier Junior and the tomatoes are like pepperonis no they're not well well we don't really want this we kind of want cereal for dinner oh cereal for dinner Junior what's wrong with you that's against the rules I'mma call the food police no please don't oh okay please don't call anybody we'll eat your stupid healthy pizza that's what I thought Junior all right guys eat up ew it's all healthy yeah there tomatoes are going to make me throw up what's wrong Cody Junior I hate Tomatoes hate them yeah they're just disgusting add that to my bio Cody hates Tomatoes that's a new character trait they're just gross and they're all mushy when you bite into them this garbage water comes out it's gross gross yeah can we just eat cereal yeah let's just eat cereal but but guys Chef pee's going to call the food please well maybe if we eat really quietly he won't notice so guys go grab your favorite cereal okay now that's more like it dude yeah we all get to eat our favorite cereals this is so illegal oh dude I'm eating cookie Chris it's cookies for breakfast for dinner and I'm eating cinnamon toast crunch the taste you can see you know I never really understood why they said it was the taste you can see I don't see anything you can't see the taste dude I can see it yeah I can see it too no what's it look like it looks like Sparkles and glitter wo really yeah look look look I don't see it you have to look closer I can't look any closer I'll help you out more like the teast you can feel your mama wait wait what what seral are you eating Cody I'm eating Froot Loops cuz I'm fruity okay that joke's getting old you say that all the time yeah I think it's something new go get a new cereal but I really do like Froot Loops no you didn't make a funny joke so go find a funny cereal that you can make a joke about okay okay guys I got lucky charms what what's the joke um they uh they're magically delicious that's their slogan that's not a joke well yours was just a slogan too you said the taste you can see no I slapped your face into the cereal and said the taste you can feel that's what made it funny yeah but you didn't know that was going to happen yes I did cuz you're gullible and you're a dweeb and I thought your big gullible dumb face was going to come do it okay look what do you want me to do okay let's just eat our cereal no go find an original cereal that you can make a joke about what other cereal would I possibly find go find one all right guys I got magic Treasures magic Treasures what kind of Brand Lucky TR is that that's all you had in there okay what's the joke um they're magically suspicious okay finally can we eat now yeah let's eat our cereal just pour this wait a minute what's this there's a magic wand in there a magic wand you going to be like Harry Potter and do like magic spells no I'm pretty sure it's just a toy no no but what if it's real what what if you could do like magic tricks oh dude that'd be so awesome like magic spells like come if it were real I could give Joseph three eyes by saying something like beehives knee eyes give him three eyes look like a monster aycl look like a monster Joseph don't forg out don't forgot but you have a third eye I know dude I can see a whole another Universe dude where time travels backwards my dad gave birth to me fish can actually walk and the food police are coming well the food police are coming okay grab the wall let's get out of here Cody that wand actually works I know Joseph how do you feel about your third eye oh dude I'm getting used to it what do you see right now uh JFK just assassinated Lee Harvey Oswald wow that eye sounds crazy yeah everything's in Reverse well so that means you're a wizard C oh yeah I guess I am what are you going to do with that wand well I don't want to use it for evil but I might see how far I can shove it up my hooa you should do something cool like you should do really cool spells like oh my God you could give me a really deep voice like a really cool manly voice um okay okay I guess I can try hi uh bad boys bad boys what you going to do give this man a bad voice did it work I don't know did it work wa dude what you sound like Elmo I I do M sound like Elmo yeah you do wait wait do the laugh oh my God that's totally Elmo yeah dude you sound like Elmo no I do sound like Elmo okay jior Junior do me your favor say the word of the day is big schlong the the word of the day is big SL you did the laugh that's it Cody change me back okay I guess I can try uh Mickey Mouse Clubhouse fix this man's squeaky mouth okay that should fix it oh thank God I was getting tired of that squeaky voice H oh no dude you sound like Mickey Mouse I do not sound like Mickey Mouse huh yeah you really do well take your dang Mouse tool and change me back okay you're really starting to piss okay I'm trying to figure it out hold on I just need to get the right words uh okay uh eggnog big big hog uh Burpy Burpee frog uh um oh what's wrong Cody what did you turn me into a frog uh yeah oh well um how about you change me back dude you sound like Kermit the Frog oh I sound like Kermit the Frog do I look green do I look like a frog and a log okay jeez I'm going to change you back you know what the good news is Cody now I can date your mom cuz she's Miss py B okay okay I have to fix this uh okay it can't be that hard uh lunar Bo make him Junior oh thank God you're back wait say something Cody I'm so mad at you that's better you need to throw that wand away it's dangerous yeah I probably shouldn't have this but before you throw it away get rid of my third eye I thought you liked it no dude no girl's going to want to date a guy with three eyes maybe three legs but not three eyes all right Cody take it away uh okay uh let me think uh and do it do it right okay okay uh three eyes goodbyes uh get rid of that thing on his head dude I can't see anything I think something happened to my eyes Jesus Christ what did you do Cody I don't know dude what does my face look like you don't have a face it's just a hand a hand give me a high five that was pretty good was pretty good you know if he tried to brush his teeth he'd give himself a manicure you're so funny Cody why weren't you that funny in the cereal scene you remember when you show me in the cereal stop fighting we got to finger this out finger okay okay no seriously we have to give Joseph a hand eat it eat it okay okay no seriously though Joseph we have to change you back oh I don't want to change dude I kind of like this you know what I'm going to eat my cereal that looks terrifying when he does that okay so so Joseph doesn't want to get changed back so what are you going to do now oh I'm going to go imply it for a job apply for a job yeah well if he gets a job he he he' be a job as a hand so he would have a hand per profession yeah oh okay so I think we should get rid of that wand yeah I think you're probably right after we mess with shpi oh yeah of course Jesus Christ Simmons look at this crime scene another case of people eating breakfast at dinner time a bunch of cereal killers they didn't even use milk those animals what's this magic Treasures oh no we're dealing with one desperate son of a [ __ ] who do you think did it m I don't know let's search the house and see what we can find well hey mate you still got my shirt from Thanksgiving no I burned it you burned it what that was my lucky shirt Simmons I don't want to talk about it anymore that day didn't happen oh all right I hate cleaning this stupid kitchen all right Junior what do you want to do to Chef peee I don't know you know be really hot is if you turn him into a girl well he's already pretty hot I know but like imagine him like as a girl he probably be really hot okay what do you want Cody um Chef peee Linguini get rid of his weenie what what did you guys just change me into a girl what yeah ew what do you mean ew she is's really hot hey shefy will you kiss me no I won't kiss you actually I look pretty hot you know what I can make the only fans and take the easy way out in life huh good for her or him or them I don't know okay okay let's go do one more thing with the wand and then we'll break it okay okay all right Junior what's the last thing we should use this wand for I don't know you should do something for yourself like what's something you've always wanted to change huh oh I know uh let's see Peter Piper picked a pack of screw it give me a big wiener oh Jesus Christ look at that thing it's like a Coke can oh yeah I can work with that Su I got big wiener energy now oh can I use that thing now stop right there you two oh no the food police what do you guys want hey mate I found a big bowl of cereal over here oh you two are so screwed thought you could just eat breakfast for dinner don't you know the rules huh huh oh we're so sorry no Sorry's not good enough I hope you two are packing cuz you're going to need it in food jail I'll be okay oh no I can't I use it real quick we have to do something to get out of the situation uh okay uh higy smiggy Piggly Wiggly what am I a piggy yeah we all Piggies mate if I wanted to be a pig I'd just go to the buffet hey mate what's your piggy name mine's Poky Pig cuz of what I do with your mother what I guess I'm Charlotte from Charlotte's Web hey Charlotte was the spider in the movie mate well I hate this I hate Pig stuff why would they name it after the spider and not the pig it's about a pig this pisses me off I'm I'm going to be mad about this all day I'm just I'm going to go home and oink at my wife and I'm going to go see your mother I'm glad we got rid of them yeah me too wait what are you doing looking at Chef Pip's only fans o let me see why couldn't he have started one before I turned him into a girl I know so I just realized something Cody I don't think you had to say all that wacky stuff when you would do a spell I think you just say what you wanted really yeah okay let's try it uh o I know what I want I want Five Guys inside me wait where are the guys uh oh I I just burp ripped up a Five Guys cheeseburger that that's not what I meant at all okay how about this I want five human men inside me what the this isn't what I meant either but I'll roll with it so Joseph what do you want to do today oh dude I got this blow Twi thing from the gas station we should totally set stuff on fire oh we can light an heels on fire oh dude yeah totally and then they can call the fire ant Department wa wait ants have fire departments yeah that's why they're called fire ants they put out fires oh dude I didn't know that that's genius okay so let's call Cody and invite him wait wait where is he I don't know he usually shows up with you let me get my phone and call him okay all right Joseph is ringing hello hey Cody me and Joseph want to burn down antill you should come over that sounds fun guys but I can't I'm at the park with Luke what Luke you got a dog no he's not my dog he's just my friend Luke like from Darth Vader what you mean from Star Wars well he's Darth Vader's son so he came from Darth Vader's testicle so he's from Darth Vader I see what you mean but no he's not Luke Skywalker so you got a dog no he's not a dog Junior he's my human friend named Luke you have friends we're your friends what but Luke is my friend too and I'm with him at the park well come hang out with us Luke sounds annoying and lame Junior I'm going to hang up now well no what's wrong Cody has a new friend named Luke wait wait Cody has friends we are his friends he he does have other friends I think he's grounded he justes know how to tell us yeah he has to be grounded dude he doesn't have friends yeah let's go to the park and see if he's there okay yeah Luke you're doing it hey Cody Junior what are you doing here this must be your new friend dookie you mean Luke yeah dookie this must be your friends Cody I don't know that I'd call them my friends why do you want to hang out with this loser and not us because he's lonely and he needs a friend oh I get it his parents are rich and if you think if you can hang out with him that his parents will give you money well he's not rich Junior I know a rich kid when I see one he's Rich Junior just get out of here well I guess me and Joseph are just going to go back to my house and eat gogurts gogurts dude yeah I only have three of them so I wonder who the third one's going to go to I don't care Junior just leave you don't care about a Go-Gurt this kid must this kid must have Danimals or or or or pizza r or something animals this kid's not playing around let's get out of here let's go dude I'm sorry about that Luke uh what's wrong dude you haven't even touched your Go-Gurt I'm just sad why because we can't use the plugies anymore oh yeah and also cuz Cody doesn't want to hang out with us like what does Luke have that we don't have uh money right he's rich I knew he was rich yeah he has a rich face yeah he's like oh I have money he he was looking at me like oh you're poor I have money man I saw him looking at you dude what can we do to make Cody hang out with us again uh I don't know oh I got an idea o we can invite a bunch of girls over and then we call Cody and when he hears all the girls over here he's going to want to come over here but how are we going to get girls over here dude Go-Gurt women Love GoGurt oh dude I totally forgot okay I'm going to start calling girls you call girls too okay dude Joseph look at all these girls sucking our gogurts I know dude it's so cool I'm calling Cody right now it's ringing okay hello hey Cody what are you doing still hanging out with Luke guess what I'm doing listen I really don't want to say junior it's a girl sucking my Go-Gurt oh well good for you yeah a girl can suck your Gogurt if you come right now no one's touched it no that's okay Junior I'm saving my Gogurt for marriage you're saving your Gogurt from Marriage loser what a dweeb oh yeah your mom said you're a dweeb what Mom yeah she's here stuck in my gobert too if you squeeze the base more comes out oh she's learning okay Junior I'm going to hang up now don't don't hang up he hung up okay so um you guys can leave now we don't need you anymore yeah leave scram we're finished with you yeah we got what we wanted you now leave thank you so what do we do now dude I don't know Joseph if gogurts and girls didn't work I don't know what will let's start thinking okay what does Luke have that we don't have besides money I mean he's bald say that again Joseph uh he's bald he's bald and you're bald too so so if I shave my head I'll be bald and then we'll all be bald and then Cody W want to hang out with us cuz we're bald yeah we'll be matching dude okay I'm I'm going to go shave my head right now all right Joseph how do I look uh you look bald we're the super bald Brothers wait can I say that is that copyright okay we can say that all right so now I'm going to call Cody tell him to come over he's going to see that we're bald he's going to want to hang out with us well if he didn't come over the first few times you asked him why would he come over now because I'm going to use my secret weapon all right Joseph it's ringing wait what's the secret weapon dude just listen Junior stop calling me I'm blocking your number oh Cody oh it's so awful what's wrong Junior well your mom she sucked my gogert dry and then she was leaving and she fell down the stairs and broke her neck what yeah yeah and I don't know whether to call the hospital or the aquarium cuz you know she's a whale what Junior is my mom hurt or not yeah she's hurt she's not moving you need to come over right now okay I'll be right there okay so now when he comes over he's going to see that we're bald and he's going to want to hang out with us Dude Perfect plan that must be him hello is my mom okay what what are you what are you doing I'm bald yeah I can see that but is my mom Okay I lied look look at my head but you lied I'm bald I don't care Junior but Luke is bald what Junior so is that why you guys shaved your head yeah we want to be like Luke cuz he's so cool right but that's not why I'm hanging out with Luke so then what is it is cuz he's Rich right no he's not rich so he's paying you to say that he's not paying you no Junior wa what is it well Junior you just wouldn't understand no no tell me I don't understand no tell Cody it has to be either cuz he's bald or Rich which one is it it it's neither junior he just he has problems problems like he's psycho no is he mad no oh no Joseph I got it he kidnapped your family he's hold him in your in his basement and he says if you're not friends with him he's going to kill him no Junior my mom was just here eating Gogurt she's fine well what if he paid someone to act like your mom I mean your mom did look fatter than usual okay I'm leaving Cody no okay Joseph this is worse than we thought he kidnapped Cody's family so we have to call a cops okay dude hey there somebody call the cops yes officer it's awful I need to report a crime all right I love a good Crime Story okay so my friend's family they got kidnapped and they're being held captive in a basement wow that's pretty serious yes I need you to arrest the kid that did it his name is Luke okay do you have an address yeah it's right here I track my friend us and five my friends oh okay uh I'll be right over there I'll get him you did good bro you did good hello uh hey I got a report that some kid named Luke was holding a family hostage here in a basement did Junior tell you to come here uh yes all right I'm back did you arrest Luke and put him in the electric chair no why not cuz I didn't find anything thing did you check the basement he didn't even have a basement did you check the attic yes did you find Cody's family his family's fine Cody facetimed them right in front of me and they answered but it's a mansion there's a lot of rooms they could have been in any of those rooms they didn't live in a mansion what it must have been the beach house oh yeah look kid it's not funny to accuse people of fake crime it's not a fake crime it's real now call me when there is a real crime dude what are we going to do now it leaves me no choice we have to commit a real crime and blame it on Luke like what I'm going to grab the toilet paper ooh toilet paper oh okay are you sure you want to do this dude yes we're going to TP my house and blame it on Luke all right you don't have to ask me twice wow Joseph look at all that toilet paper I know dude that's vandalism Junior I saw you TP the house oh you're in trouble now I'm going to tell your daddy me when I get out of here it Joseph let me out oh man Joseph oh that was close Chef would have told my dad I know dude and you would have got grounded yeah we can't have that yeah okay so now I'm going to call the cops and we're going to say that Luke T be my house yeah yeah he did hey there somebody call the cops yes officer somebody tpd my house yeah I saw that this is a very serious crime now who do you think did this do you have any enemies well officer be strong dude be strong I know who did it you can do it I just don't want him to come after me um his name is uh L Luke Luke yeah Luke the kids house you went to earlier okay I'm starting to think maybe you just have a thing against this Luke kid no it was him it was him he showed up with his his his group of friends all named Luke and then they TP my house MH well do you have any evidence of this yes I do my security cameras come here okay all right Officer here's a security camera footage so if you look at the top right hand corner you notice Luke and his group of buddies all named Luke just show up to my house right they're all armed with toilet paper and they're like we hate junior we're going to ruin his night so they all just start throwing toilet paper all over my see boom there goes one roll and another roll and another roll and they just start destroying my house of toilet paper and they run off cuz they notice I have security cameras and they're like ah we hate junior so you see look they committed a huge crime and they graffitied my house with toilet paper those fiends yeah so uh I need you go arrest Luke all right now you're sure it's Luke that did this right cuz he's going to jail oh it was definitely Luke Joseph wasn't it Luke yeah of course it's Luke who else could it be yeah it was Luke he said my name's Luke you couldn't hear it cuz the audio yeah he said he said his name was name Luke okay all right I'll go get him yes going down dude hello all right I'm here for a kid named Luke what that's me all right you're under arrest for teep peing a house what he didn't Tepee a house oh yes he did I saw the proof you're coming with me a so what are we going to do now dude well now that Luke's in jail Cody's going to come begging to hang out with us Junior hey buddy don't hate buddy me do you prefer Amigo no Junior you get Luke arrested actually Luke got himself arrested because he decided to Tepee my house no he didn't Junior I was with him the whole time you helped him Tepee my house no Junior you Ted your own house and you blame it on Luke see that's why we're best friends cuz you know me so well Junior get away from me what's wrong Cody you get to hang out with us now Junior do you want to know what's really happening yes the reason I was hanging out with Luke is because he's terminally sick so he's really good at skateboarding no Junior I mean he has 3 days left to live he's going to die soon don't tell me that now I'm going to feel bad you should feel bad because now he's going to die in jail don't tell me that now I'm going to feel bad Junior look look we're going to get him out of jail okay but how we're going to dig a hole under the prison and sneak them out Junior that's stupid now I have to go tell his parents why they're not going to see their son on his last day on Earth wait is he going to space but no Junior he's going to die you you leave earth when you die I guess so well I want to die and go to Mars that sounds really sick but anyway no I feel really bad because because of your stupid idea to get him arrested now he's going now he's going to be in jail I'm sorry dude I'm sorry I goofed okay yeah you goofed you're big goofed oh I'm sorry dude God please help us what do you want God we really need your help yeah I know did you just see what happened yeah you're going to hell that was pretty messed up what I am yeah wait no no no I'm sorry I want to fix everything okay so what can I do to get Luke out of jail and to fix his sickness H that's a lot of work you're asking me to do the only currency I accept is Facebook likes Facebook likes yep one like equals one prayer oh that's why there's so many post asking for that yeah exactly okay so how many likes to get Luke out of jail and to heal his sickness H for that 10,000 likes on Facebook that's a lot of likes yeah they're not easy to get either okay so Joseph we need to make a post on Facebook that gets 10,000 likes go okay dude I can do it all right we're going to do it God we're going to do it just stay right here dude dude dude I did it wait you did it I got 142,000 likes in 4 minutes wait in 4 minutes oh yeah dude it's a classic minions post look it says rip I just died if you don't care stop reading if you would care like this pig if you would miss me comment a heart if you're not scared repost to see who your real friends are oh my God that was genius Joseph I know dude you only asked for 10,000 likes we got a 142,000 H let me absorb the likes unlimited power I'm now a mega guard can you get Luke out of jail and heal his sickness I can do anything po all right guys everything's back to normal we can all be happy no Junior I'm still mad why because of all the bad stuff you did to Luke but he's out of jail now and he he's cured one minions post doesn't take back all the bad stuff you did fine Cody I'll apologize hey Luke I'm really sorry that I got you arrested but you're out of jail now so it's in the past so get over it mhm okay so um I guess you're part of our friend group now no actually he's not he's moving to Vermont I was just down here for treatment oh well I want to add you on Facebook what's your last name emia okay all right Joseph we have to add him on Facebook his name is Luke emo uh so Joseph what do you want to do today oh dude let's go wash our hands with a bunch of soap I bet I can wash my hands better than you can wash your hands what no you can't Silly Billy yes I can you silly goose Silly Billy Silly Billy Silly Billy hey guys guess what I just bought for $2,000 $2,000 where'd you get that kind of money oh I've been saving up my money for whenever I do chores for the last 10 years every penny well what' you spend $2,000 on I want you to guess a car no I can't drive a boat well I definitely can't drive a boat a spaceship Junior you guess was it a spaceship dude no huh um did you pay someone to cut off their finger what yeah did you pay $2,000 for someone's finger why would I pay $2,000 for a finger maybe it had a diamond ring on it o nice guess dude nice guess I like that why wouldn't I just buy the ring maybe it didn't fit your finger so you wanted their finger cuz it fit the finger yeah two for one special dude what no it's not a finger well then what is it it's this check it out oh you got the new iPhone no not the phone it's what's on the phone the phone case what no the picture wait what is that it's a noodle dude it looks like a stick it's not a stick it's an nft what's an nft well it's a non-fungible token oh it's a token so you can use that at Chuck-E-Cheese oo now that's fun no it's not that kind of token it's a nonf funable token you can't fune it so what is it well it's a picture you paid $2,000 to have a picture on your phone no I paid $2,000 for an nft so what's it do well you're doing it what we we can only look at it well yeah I mean no no actually you could hang it up on the walls of your digital house a digital house yeah you know in the metaverse like I mean I guess technically I'd have to buy some land in the metaverse and and then hire a digital construction worker to build me a house but but then I could hang it up on the walls why don't you just go on your computer print it out and hang it up in your real house yeah because that wouldn't be the same thing that this is an nft so you only have it on your phone well yeah well what if your phone dies well then I just charge my phone well what if a meteor hits the Earth and there's no electricity anymore well that's not going to happen well what if it does well then I'd have bigger problems than just my noodle You'll wish you had that 2,000 long back well no no I'm happy with this so what are you going to do with it in the future like how long you going to have it for oh well I could probably sell it for a lot of money maybe who else would buy this well I don't know somebody who wants a noodle no one's going to pay $2,000 for this Cody yes they will look look look the the the cool thing is that I could put this in my digital world okay hold on wait what are you doing all right Cody I just made it in my virtual world in Minecraft yeah but that's that's not the metaverse it doesn't matter more people play Minecraft well but but people can't come visit it yeah I can open up the server and everyone can come look at my nft that I own now well but that's you don't own that see I have the original well what if I just took a picture of your phone with my phone then it would be on my phone and I would own it no you can't do that yeah hold on give me a second well but you can't what you look I just did I just took a picture look I own it now it's on my phone well you don't you don't own it though yeah I do it's on my phone hey hey Joseph I just sent you a text oh what you send me dude oh dude I own it now yeah we all own it oh no no you guys don't own it you just have it it's on our pH we we own it it's on your phone it's on our phones we all own it but it's not worth anything though how would anyone know that you own it they all they would think we all own it well look right there it says owned by Cody I could have been Cody yeah I could have make a username Cody my name is Cody but but but you can't sell it that's the main thing I can sell I can print this out and I can sell more copies than that one sells no nobody would buy that what why because this is the real one and they didn't I paid $2,000 for this so hold on all right Cody I just printed this out and framed it whoa dude this looks sick I would totally buy this for $22,000 no that's that's dumb no one would buy that but it's the physical version you can touch it and feel it and even if your phone dies you can still see it and you can hang it up in your real house in real life but but I I have the original so it's I paid $2,000 for this you know how much I paid for this I paid $5 for the frame and a dollar to print out at UPS so it cost $6 to get a physical version that'll never disappear like no matter what like even if electricity stopped existing I would always have this picture what a steal but but but but you can't put it in the metaverse you know you people around the world can see mine like somebody in Japan could see this they couldn't see yours I can FaceTime somebody in Japan and show it to them over the phone or I can make a video on YouTube about it and show it to him but but Justin Bieber couldn't see it what well Justin Bieber did a concert in the metaverse so he could have come to my virtual house in the meterse if I had one and he could see my noodle why would Justin Bieber come to your house you're not cool dude yeah why don't we just buy tickets to a Justin Bieber concert sit Row one hold it up in front of him he has a better chance of seeing it from the stage than in your stupid virtual world he's not going to stop by your virtual house but but mine I I could I could sell this for a lot of money someday you know this is an investment I can sell this for a lot of money I bet you I can I'm I'm going call an art dealer and I'll have him come over and see how much he'll get me for this well no you can't do that so where's the painting that's for sale it's right here oh my sweet baby Jesus that is the most elegant painting I've ever seen in my entire life in all my years of collecting art I've never seen something so modern yet so minimalistic I'll take it I'll take it for $10,000 wait what actually no it would be my pleasure to pay more I'll pay $20,000 but but but but look right here I have the original oh great you took a picture of my painting you may have a photo of my painting but I have the original right here no no no that's not the original this is the original they just printed it out come here okay I don't give a [ __ ] okay this right here is the original you just took a picture great have fun with your picture but no no no I I paid for this one hey do you want to buy the one that I made on Minecraft could get out of the way look I I made it on Minecraft yes I'll take it I'll take it for $10,000 oh you can have it then great no no but but I have the original one right here but this one right here is 3D I can walk around it and [ __ ] M thank you so much pleasure doing business pleas pleasure doing business with you but don't you want this one see Cody look I just made $30,000 off your stupid little Doodle photo but this is stupid he can't use any of that stuff in the metaverse like Justin Bieber can't see it oh dude I'm about to go pris more copies yeah I going print more too but no don't dude we're about to make so much cash heck yeah we are guys I'm going to call the cops if you don't stop wait why well because you're stealing my nft and you're selling it we're not stealing your nft you said the one on your phone is the only original one we're just printing them out and selling them but but but but it's still like mine and you're making money off of it well you said these are worthless well they are well then why do we make $30,000 selling them well that'll never happen again oh dude I think we got a customer how much are these uh I'll sell two of them for $20,000 all right sure dude we just made a sale okay that's it I'm calling the cops oh Cody come on all right dude I just printed out two more copies we got to stay stucked up good thinking Joseph also we don't offer refunds we don't want people asking for their money back when they realize they're not worth anything oh yeah you're right smart smart there they are officer oh so these are the kids who stole something from you that was worth $2,000 huh yeah they sure did all right you kids should know that this is a very serious crime stealing something worth that much is a felony but officer we didn't steal anything we just printed out photos that we found on our phone yeah oh well yes they did steal something from me they stole my noodle what I'm sorry what you noodle yeah this picture right here in my phone but it's also on my phone yeah my phone too what I'm sorry I don't understand whose picture is this it's mine because I paid $2,000 for it whoa hold on what I'm sorry you paid $2,000 for that little picture on your phone yeah well kid that's the real crime here you got scammed it's not a scam I wanted this what why because he's a stupid dumb idiot and he thinks it's worth something no it's because I want to show it to Justin Bieber in my virtual house in the metaverse um kids is is he okay like is he on something he's been talking crazy all day yeah he's sick in the head well I'm not crazy this is the future okay kid so are you like seeing aliens and stuff too well yeah I I guess there could be aliens in the metaverse anything's possible okay I'm going to check him into a mental facility cuz something's wrong with him there is yeah I understand no no no it's nfts it's it's the meterse but but but my noodle okay we're going to get you a lot of noodles in the facility okay but no no no no but my noodle though no it's okay we're going to get you the help you need I'm so glad he's getting help right all right kids you should probably know before you go in there he's in a straight jacket and a padded room for your protection and his so just let us know if he gets too crazy what's up buddy don't what's up buddy me you guys stole my noodle nurse he's yelling no Junior all right what's going on in here he was yelling at us yeah he tried to bite me are we going to have to put the mask on you so you don't bite anybody no I'll be nice all right Cody use your words you guys stole my noodle you keep talking about noodles Cody that's why you're in here yeah guys the metaverse is the future if you keep talking like that they'll never let you out all right we got a mental health professional here to do some therapy for you all right kids move out of the way for Nurse Jackie that put him in a straight Jackie hello there I don't want to talk to her oh he doesn't want to talk to you get the rabbit okay here talk to Mr Bunny oh Mr Bunny I don't want to talk to Mr Bunny a come on tell me Mr Bunny how you feel okay Mr Bunny my [ __ ] friend stole my noodle this poor kid won't stop talking about noodles somebody get him a noodle please Jackie the goddamn noodle please okay all right all right here's your noodle what what is this this isn't my noodle get that away from me oh no he can't even recognize noodles anymore he's completely lost touch with reality I want to call the family to see if we have to put him down damn shame guys you have to get me out of here well no Cody like if we let you out of here you're going to start talking about noodles again guys guys please look if you get me out of here I'll admit the noodle was stupid you will yes will you try to sell it yeah sure he still thinks it's worth something he hasn't changed no no no no guys please get me out of here I'll delete it or something I'll figure it out okay Cody we'll believe it come on buddy come on buddy all right before we put your son down are you sure this is what you want to do yes I'm sure this what I want to do no son of mine is going to talk about noodles and [ __ ] this is not a life he should live no son of ours is going to talk about noodles yeah we could just make another one ain't that right Baby time to get a new mattress all right I'll let you say your goodbyes what oh no he's escaped what this is bad he's a danger to society we're going to have to catch him thanks for getting me out of the mental institution you're not going to talk about noodles anymore are you no I'm not going to talk about noodles we also sold all the pictures we printed out oh good I'm very proud of you for stealing my stuff also we made this oh my God what the hell is that it's a 4D sculpt sugar noodle 4D what does it have a smell mhm oh my God it smells like noodles exactly right isn't it cooler than the dumb one you bought on your phone that doesn't do anything stupid phone noodle I have to admit guys this is pretty cool would you pay more than $2,000 for this yeah I think I would he's learning I know well this one's better because you get to see it it pokes out at you it's really cool and it has a smell dude mhm yeah I mean there is one downside what what is it I mean you can't say it say it you can't use it in the metaverse and you're staying in your straight jacket oh come on guys oh dude I think we have a buyer oh my God that is the most Divine sculpture I've ever seen I'll buy it for $130,000 seriously you can have it great oh my god dude all this cash we just made $130,000 off that sculpture what this is ridiculous but I have this noodle there he is get him no no no no no no don't take me back no you tried to bite me yeah he's crazy I'm going to sell his stupid nft cuz I'm tired of looking at it yeah me too dude it actually sold for $1,000 more we rich all right guys are you ready to eat our peanut butter and jelly sandwiches dude you know I love my PB and J Jesus Joseph leave some peanut butter and jelly for the rest of the world no it's all for me the only thing I like about PB and J is the BJ part what the butter and jelly you missed the point of the joke but sure all let's just eat our peanut butter and jellies Joseph looks like he's almost done it's mine okay I don't know what part of mine I should eat just eat the whole sandwich dude God guys this tastes kind of weird what what are you talking about I don't know I just I don't really feel good feel like my throat's closing up guys I can't breathe you should have gotten vaccinated I did there's nothing wrong with the sand there's nothing wrong with the sandwich it's just peanut butter and jelly Cody stop acting ridiculous hey guys help me I can't Cody how's your sandwich I mean Joseph how's your sandwich oh it's delicious oh can I get another one dude yeah let's go make another one guys help holy [ __ ] dude Cody why do you look like Rudolph the redo's Reindeer something's wrong I can't breathe oh dude we should call a doctor or something or we should call Santa cuz he's missing one of his reindeer dude you're hilarious Cody stop acting ridiculous look we're going upstairs come on come on Rudolph all right Cody just lay right here and watch TV until you feel better I need a doctor please a Dr Pepper Joseph get him a Dr Pepper all right I'm money dude I got you a Dr Pepper you need to cut the dark sodas out it's not good for you no I need a Dr soon a Dr Seuss book Joseph get him a Dr Seuss book oh Dr Seuss oh yeah Dr SE is good for you I got the Cat in the Hat it's my face no I need a doctor to make me feel better doct Dr go print out a picture of Dr Phil all right I'm on it dude all right the doctor's right here here's Dr Phil no I need a medical doctor Dr Phil is a medical doctor Joseph Google his degree all right dude I'm on it all right it says right here he went to Midwestern State University in 1975 then he went to University of North Texas in 1979 I don't care then he went to the University of Tulsa but it doesn't say whenn but he went yeah so Dr Phil is a medical doctor so say sorry to him no call me a doctor call you a doctor if you don't consider Dr Phil a doctor why would we call you a doctor I would not get a check up by you dude call a doctor on the phone oh he needs us to call him a doctor he could have just said that yeah let me call him hey there somebody call a doctor ew is that Dr Phil get him out of here I refuse to work in front of Dr Phil he reminds me of my creepy uncle and I don't like him okay wait is that a Dr Pepper get that out of here too Dr Pepper gives doctors a bad name yeah get a Mr pib instead he knows his place wait is that the cat and the hat I hate cats especially when they wear hats it's unnatural get that out of here all all right what's up well my friend was eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and then he started acting like a drama queen oh no it looks like he's having some kind of allergic reaction a whaty what what an allergic reaction I think he was probably allergic to the peanut butter you can be allergic to peanut butter yeah he probably just has a nut allergy look you just stab him with this epan that'll cure them right up yeah oh thank God doctor what happened well I think you're probably just allergic to nuts what allergic to nuts no I can't be allergic to nuts I love nuts I love nuts in my mouth I love all kinds of nuts I love big nuts small nuts round nuts crunchy nuts Dee nuts got him well even even his last name has nuts his last name is nut kiss yeah he likes dues it's impossible for him to stay away from nuts I'm sorry kid you're just going to have to stay away from nuts from now on if you don't want to die stay away from nuts [Applause] no he's so ugly when he cries he's hideous dude it's not that serious Cody yes it is Junior I'm allergic to nuts that's my whole thing I love nuts everybody knows how much I love nuts God we get it you're so gay shut up yeah Cody you can just like something else now what like girls ew I'll just lay here and be sad forever well I'm hungry dude I need some M&M's oh can I have an &m oh sure buddy hey Cody you want M&M what kind are they uh it's chocolate dude okay here you go buddy wait what kind of M&M's are these uh chocolate but it says peanut on the B yeah he can't have nuts oh I forgot oh Cody what do you need the pen he needs a pen oh I can I can get a pen dude he wants to write down what's wrong okay uh here you go buddy here's a pen not that pen he doesn't want that pen why cuz it's brown huh you wanted to drink from a separate water fountain huh no no Happ pen a safety pen oh safety pen need a safety pen you said that dude hurry here's the safety pen buddy no the pen you IM pen p a pencil a pencil oh a pencil want a pencil a pencil here you go buddy and it's sharpen no no B oh he needs this pen oh he could have said that sh oh the pin that'll save his life hold on buddy I got it you guys could have killed me with those peanuts dude I didn't know it was peanuts in there I was just trying to give you a snack it says peanuts right there in the wrapper you're going to have to start reading off the rappers from now on Eminem Snoop Dog Tupac what are you doing you said I need to start reading off the rappers but no the candy wrappers well then say candy rappers next time do you guys have any candy I can have this isn't full of peanuts uh yeah I got a candy bar right here are there peanuts in it no it says Hershey on the rapper dude okay I'll have a piece of that then okay buddy here you go thanks how is this possible are there peanuts in that um Cody it does not say there's peanuts in it read the rapper uh Tupac Eminem that a candy rapper oh um it says uh it says Hershey's milk chocolate with whole almonds but it does not say peanuts what's wrong with you all mens are nuts all men are nuts I thought you like guys no you don't like guys time he likes girls now no I'm allergic yeah you're allergic to nuts but there's no nuts in this there's just almonds you idiot the pet do the pen again I can't use that pen unless you're having allergic reaction I am I'm what there's no nuts in here do the best okay if you die for me using this when you're not supposed to be used it's your fault okay okay that didn't stay the hell away from me why are you acting like that Cody because I was having an allergic reac ction because almonds are a kind of nut you're a nut what what the hell you guys are going to kill me what almonds are not a nut yes they are then why doesn't it have nut in the name there's pean nuts walnuts hazelnuts macadamian nut almond okay what about cashews what the hell is that you just making up stuff now okay that's it I don't trust any of you with food anymore we did not know that almonds were nuts it's really confusing they should put nut in the name it should be called an almond nut but they don't have to do that because everybody already knows it I didn't know that and Joseph didn't know that oh he look Cody how about we go eat a bowl of cereal there's nothing bad with cereal okay I guess that's safe as long as it's not honeynut Cheerios it won't be that it'll be like Froot Loops or something okay all right guys are you ready to eat some Minecraft creeper crunch wow you guys made a really big mess last time we'll get Chef to clean it up later just make sure it doesn't get near me just stay over there okay are you sure there's no nuts in the cereal there's no nuts in it Cody it says the cinnamon flavored cereal with marshmallows ooh marshmallows okay do you like it Joseph uh it's okay I would rather have some Lucky Charms dude I think I have some Lucky Charms Oh what now Cody there has to be nuts somewhere there's no nuts in this cereal look look at the box look at the Box what's wrong where are the nuts I don't know I mean the milk is sponsored by almonds wa what yeah look look look look it right here sponsored by almonds it must be the Olympics D yeah the Olympics guys it's almond milk what's almond milk it's milk that comes from almonds you can't get milk from almonds almonds do not have titties or UTS you can get milk from almond milk them right now yeah I want to see you milk them guys I need the pen you're not getting the pen until you show us milk coming from the almonds please give me the pen come upstairs come [Music] on all right Cody explain the almond milk thing look almond milk comes from almonds how all right show me milk them right now I'll give you $5 keep those things away from me I'm going to need the pen again but how can milk come from these almonds look I don't understand it either okay I just know that if I eat those again I'm going to die so you're allergic to milk too but yeah sure I'm allergic to milk who's that what PJ crit Shaw hey what's up did you just walk into my house well yeah it's raining PJ doesn't want to get his PJs wet that makes sense PJ doesn't get wet he makes things wet isn't that right ladies yeah I have a slip and slide at my house maybe you can come over sometime it would be an honor PJ but what are you doing here I just wanted to hang like the Scooby-Doo gang you know see what's going on well yeah I would love to hang out okay where's your couch upstairs who's at the door Junior PJ CAW P Jam's CAW jimie jams CAW that's the one hey guys what's up oh it's an honor to be at your presence Mr CAW what's he doing here I don't know but but he brought hot girls if PJ thinks you're cool then you're totally hot want to make out dude we're so cool they want us yeah I just wanted to come over and hang out with the normal people you know see what it's like to be a normal kid I can't believe you bruss made a mess in that kitchen with those peanut butter and jelly sandwiches you better come downstairs to clean it up right now huh peanut butter and jelly my middle name is Brandon so my initials are PBJ PBJ crenchaw jelly jams crenchaw cut the crust off crinch off hey who wants to go eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with me my treat I want to eat the peanut I want to eat her I I I I can't excuse me what sh up doing I'm sorry I just can't are you really going to deny my free offer to have a feast of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches you hearing this lady he just said no to PJ kingshaw that's not cool we're not going to make out with you anymore oh no no Cody doesn't know what he's talking about Cody can eat 1 th000 peanut butter and jelly sandwiches yeah yeah I saw him eat 25 minutes ago but no I didn't no no he he can eat more peanut butter and jelly sandwiches than anyone I've ever met oh really well it sounds like you're challenging me to a peanut butter and jelly sandwich eating content yeah he is no I'm not yeah he can eat more than anyone can eat in the entire world all right then it's official we're going to have a peanut butter and jelly sandwich eatting contest and whoever can eat the most peanut butter and jelly sandwiches wins but Junior why would you do that you know I can't eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches well we don't want those girls to leave us yeah but Junior I'm going to die well no if you start freaking out we'll stab you with the epip pen and save your life it's for emergencies only this is an emergency now eat those peanut butter and jelly sandwich come on dude all right whoever can eat all five of these peanut butter and jelly sandwiches first is the win dinner guys I really don't want to do this come on Cody you have to do it for us you have to do it for the girls yeah do it for us D come on okay we'll have the pen ready all right 3 2 1 go I would yay dude I can't believe you lost you lost Cody you're so stupid come on wow I can't believe you lost Cody I got your stupid epip pin but now that you lost girls will never talk to to us hey there champ PJ crw God is that you you know kid even though you lost the contest you really gulped down those sandwiches you showed some real fight and I'm proud of you keep your head up champ I'll see you around ladies give his boy some treatment okay M Mah we just got kissed on the cheek dude I just lost my v card Cody you got us kissed by girls I don't care I need the pen oh right the [Music] pen okay T I'm going home no don't go home Cody you got girls to kiss us yeah I lost my v card dude if I stay here I'm going to die no no no we don't have to eat any more stuff no more nut stuff let's just sit back and watch a nice calm movie okay that seems safe enough what movie do you want to watch I don't care you pick Joseph what movie you want to watch definitely not Big Hero 6 dude do not ever bring that movie up in front of me ever again I hate Big Hero S is the worst movie in the world what if we watch The Nutty Professor I'm not allergic I just hate that movie so guys what do you want to do today oh hold on guys I'm getting a phone call who could be calling Cody he doesn't have friends I know right hello really oh my God what's wrong Cody my parents just died in a car accident oh no ter Cody I'm so sorry what can we do for you April fools that was a good one Cody oh man he had me yeah you really got us Cody guys I have a secret to tell you what I drink my own blood you drink your own blood yeah I think I'm a vampire all I want to do is drink blood I judge the vampire oh my God April Fool it's a fruit punch bottle oh thank God yeah for a second there I thought it was actually blood oh it is blood it's just in a fruit punch bottle oh uh hey Cody yeah there's something I've always been want to tell you yeah I love you and I really want to kiss you on that big PB filed mouth of yours really yeah can you can you just please do me a favor and kiss me one time okay all right let's kiss bro I don't want to kiss your ugly face he fell for it dude yeah oh okay all right so um all right guys I think that's enough April Fool's jokes for today okay so can let's just watch TV yeah okay where's the remote where is the remote uh Cody can you get it it's behind the couch oh okay I don't see it hey BR you're an idiot why did you think it was behind the couch well Junior that was just kind of annoying can you actually grab the remote for me though well where is it it's on the floor right there I dropped it okay Junior I don't see it hey BR again idiot come on oh okay seriously can you grab the remote it's it's between the cushions is it really yeah look look I I just can't reach it can you grab it for me okay better be under here junior it's not he's such a dummy dude idiot idiot idiot you know what Junior I'm not looking for the remote anymore Joseph can you grab the remote for me okay where is it dude it's behind that pillow okay yeah hey bro man I'm tell me now just stop it okay seriously seriously it's it's in the it's in the bathroom by the sink no no I'm not not looking for it Joseph is in the bathroom by the sink okay I get it uh dude I don't see it here okay okay seriously I'll go I'll go get her all right guys I got the remote guys the remote's Dead really try it okay Junior it works fine a that's not even really ow Junior lying and hitting people are not April Fool's pranks yeah they are let's just watch the news breaking news M NASA has an Urgent Message right now let's go to the press conference hey there it's me a guy from NASA so we have some pretty scary news uh it seems that there's a meteor that is going to come to Earth and in the next 10 minutes it's going to kill everybody in the world so uh we apologize for the short notice what the world did they oh no oh there's so many things I haven't done yet like milk a cow milk a cow yeah that was the one thing you wanted to do yeah everybody wants to milk a cow who does it we can call Cody's mom over so you can do it real quick oh Shake bir yeah well I'll never be able to hear Junior apologize for all the jokes he's made about my mom because they're not jokes it's the truth your mom's fat I'll never get to see your mom lose weight April fools come on you didn't really think we were going to get killed by a media right like would I be this Cop come on you guys are dumb even Nast is doing April Fool's jokes I want to do April Fool's joke on Chef peipi yeah dude we got to do a good one on him o I got an idea let's shoot him in the eye with this Nerf toy oh that's a good idea dude right ow Junior that's not really a prank that's that's just assault it's going to be funny I'm going to shoot him in the eye and he's going to go ow I'm blind I'm going say April fools well how about we do a less painful prank like this whoopy cushion a whoopy cushion yeah when he sits on it it'll go and it'll sound like he farted what are we five well I just thought it'd be funny well what are we 5 years old little baby want to use just whoopy cushion oh little baby Cody like that little baby Cody want to you make a little fart joke oh look at little baby Cody wants to use a silly little whoopy cushion would baby like that would little baby Cody like to use stupid little fart whoopy cushion oh yeah think oh come on baby Cody come on baby grab your stupid whoopy cushion grab your little baby whoopy cushion let's go prank sh baby with your little fart stupid dumb whoopy cushion baby toy okay jeez all right guys there's Chef peee all right little little baby how you going to get to sit on your little poopy cushion you know Junior I'm kind of not wanting to do this anymore what you don't want to do it anymore what's wrong with the little baby you want to make a little poopy joke well you keep calling me a widow baby and it makes me not want do it because your prank is a stupid idea and how you going to get me set on the whoopie cushion I don't know I got an idea come on all right little baby Cody shf peipi takes naps here all the time so when he takes a nap he's going to lay on it it's going to fart you're going to laugh at your little 5-year-old fart joke well how are you going to get him to lay down well I'm going to pretend to be my Dad and tell him he can go on break and then when he comes to lay down on his break and you're going to laugh at his little stupid joke okay all right okay there's Chef be cleaning I just got to sound like my dad hey uh Chef peipi uh you can go on break you done a lot of hard work lately what a break oh my God I never get breaks okay thanks boss okay guys let's watch Chey sit on the whoopy cushion oh man I am so tired I can't wait to take a nap wait what a whoopy cushion I can't believe Junior actually thought I would fall for that I'm not stupid oh it's April Fool's Day I totally forgot you know what I'mma to play a joke on him I'm going to make him think I actually died I'm going sit on the whoopy cushion and uh uh yeah he's going to think I had a heart attack I'm a genius oh man I am so tired I can't wait to sit on this couch you know what I hope there's not a whoopy cushion on here oh my God oh my heart my heart oh I'm dying I think I just had a heart attack oh no shef peipi had a heart attack well like a fart attack this is no time for jokes Cody your joke killed shef peipi well I didn't think the woy cushion would kill him maybe that's why people don't use Woofy cushions anymore because they're deadly you wanted to shoot him in the eye it would have just blinded him dude you had to be selfish yeah would you rather be blind or dead H well I don't know actually what do we do with shipi I think we should call a doctor no we can't call a doctor cuz me you and especially Joseph are going to go to jail yeah it's true that's the times we're living in yeah Cody why' you have to kill shef peipi I didn't want to kill Chef B besides you're the one who put the woy cush in there but it was your evil mastermind murder plan that did it I didn't do anything so I'm out of here dude yeah be safe Joseph he can't get caught he'll go to jail definitely okay so what do we do with Chef peipe I think we bury him bury him yeah we bury in the backyard as deep as we can so no one ever finds him wait really yeah Junior if we get caught we're going to jail and my loose butt will last in prison it will oh yeah it'll last for a long time and as much as I'd enjoy it I'm claustrophobic and I don't want to live in a cell do you think there's fortnite in jail probably not Junior otherwise everybody be doing crimes yeah okay so let's go grab a box and bury Che peipi in the backyard okay shef pe's in a box now a shoe box it's the only box I have he looks so peaceful hi Miss Chef peee yeah he's burning macaroni and cheese in heaven now are you sure he's in heaven what do you mean he might be in Hell really why he was a really bad person he liked to push old ladies downstairs oh my God that's terrible I never did that what did you hear that April fools he didn't do that oh thank God I thought ship was a bad person there for a second sheipi is not a bad person he just didn't know how to cook oh yeah he sucked at cooking oh terrible awful the worst Food I've ever tasted disgusting if he makes food for God he's going to go to hell yeah anyway let's go bury shef peipe in the backyard in the back backyard like a like a hamster yeah like like a hamster all right Cody let's go Berry Chef peee well we need a shovel Junior oh I got a shovel come on oh man they're about to start burying me and soon as they start throwing dirt on me I'mma bust out of this box and they're going to think I'm a Zombie it's going to be hilarious all right Cody the shovels in here wait wait wait Junior what we should duct tape the box clothes why well because we don't want bugs to eat Chef pe's gorgeous body you're right if we don't du eat the Box chef then bugs will be able to eat him and eat his brains yeah yeah you don't want that all right so grab some duct tape while I grab the shovel okay all right Cody start taping the box up yeah Jenny I'm really glad we decided to listen to loud rock music in these headphones it really distracts from how tragic this whole thing is yeah start taping okay wait what's that noise are they taping the box sh guys let me out I'm alive I'm alive let me out this song rocks yeah you're shaking the Box a lot Cody I'm sorry it's shaking a lot stop all right I think it's good Junior all right let's go bury him okay okay there's Chef peipe in the ground yeah this is what he would have wanted all right start burying him Cody got it okay oh poor Chef peee amazing gra how sweet guys this isn't funny stop burying me alive guys this isn't funny this isn't funny stop ping me please please please stop stop it right now all right that I had to hold him a poor Chef peee do you have anything nice to say about him uh yeah okay uh let's see uh he uh he he he could burn water I'll give him that yeah he he had a nice butt I guess yeah he did yeah he did um um Chef PE you were my chef for a lot of years you helped me grow up to be the man that I'm going to be one day probably going to go to prison yeah I love you Chef peee oh Cody I miss Chef peee yeah I'll never forgive you for killing my chef oh I'm sorry he died from a fart I mean he would have died just as easily from being shot in the eye who's at the door I don't know I'm going to go answer the door hello hey hey hey kid it's okay cops not scary we're your friends okay what are you doing here oh is Chef peipi home why why why Chef Pee why you asking for him well well I found his wallet and I want to return it to him I can give it to him just give it to me I can give it to him no no legally it has to be me that returns it why why I live with him he trusts me I can give it to him well but you might steal it so it's got to be no I'm not going to steal it shipi loves me and and I know all the things about him so if you just give me the wall I can give it to him no no no that's fine just just where is he where shipi yeah uh he's underground working he he's working underground he works on the Underground Railroad the the Underground Railroad yeah in New York City on the subway he works on on those railroad tracks well okay well that's not what that is so just give me the wallet and I'll give it to when he gets back hold on something weird is going on here Chef Pee he's a chef not a train conductor this this is kind of strange maybe I should come in and have a look around no no no no no okay okay look I I'll tell you what's going on Chef peipe was murdered what really yeah but my friend Cody and he's trying to cover it up he here's what happened Cody wanted to do an April Fool's joke on him and and he put a whoopy cushion on the couch and CHF sat on it and it farted so loud shipi had a heart attack and then we buried his body in the shoe box in the backyard oh okay I see what's going on here it's an April Fool's prank very good no no it's not April Fool's joke it's real it really happened Shep's dead I can take you to the body right now yeah yeah of course you can well that was pretty good kid I almost fell for that but next time make the death a little less ridiculous cuz dying from a heart attack after you sit on a whoopy cushion that's that's not believable it really happened though his body's in the backyard right now okay okay okay you're taking the joke too far so so just forget it but but you know I got to tell you I was actually going to pull a prank on Chef Pee cuz this isn't even his wallet this is my wallet I was going to give it to him and say April fools that's not really your wallet yeah anyway good one so uh have a good night well no no no that's not a joke it's real I'm trying to admit to a crime oh who's at the door Junior uh the cops the cops huh you didn't snitch on me did you cuz if you did I'll kill you no no I didn't tell him anything liar F fell I heard you you told him I killed Chef peee well I I I didn't know what to say who's that I don't know but I'm coming with you in case it's the cop so I can tell them my side of the the story oh don't bring that don't don't bring don't bring the toy fine yeah they'll think it's real hello I am going to kill you sh's a zombie I'm not a zombie I was playing a prank on you to make you think I was dead and you decided to Bear me in the backyard is so it was an April Fool's prank yes it was an April Fool's prank that was a pretty good one yeah it's pretty good yeah oh I'm going to kill you man I hate wrapping presents hey shfp what are you doing oh oh I'm just putting your Christmas gifts under the Christmas tree oh these are my gifts mhm wait I only have three gifts for Christmas that's lame I mean s's going to bring you more uh these are just the gifts from me and your dad can I open up one today please no Christmas is only a week away you can wait a week please let me open up one today please no Junior you're going to wait a week okay what if I open up one while you're in the bathroom that's why I have this wait what it's a Elf on the Shelf on a table what's an elf on a shelf on a table he just watches and makes sure little boys like you don't open the Christmas grips Before Christmas what about little girls it doesn't matter the Jinder Junior how many genders are there it's only two genders actually there's over 70 genders I don't care about your conspiracy theories look if this elf catches you open your Christmas gifts before Christmas he's going to kill you kill me oh yeah I've seen it done before yeah he killed my twin brother you had a twin brother yeah I had a twin brother he opened the Christmas gifts and then yeah he got killed so don't open your gifts he he's going to kill me who's that uh hello hey Junior what's up dude uh Hey guys uh what are you doing here what's wrong Junior you seem spooked Chef peipi just told me something really scary did he tell you that in 2050 the world population will reach 10 billion people which means it won't be enough food to feed everybody which means it'll be a famine so everybody will kill everybody for food don't tell me that I'll be like 60 by then there's no way I can fight for food guys what chefi told me was way scarier than that what really yeah come inside okay all right dude show me what's scarier than world hunger that what's that it looks like an Elf on the Shelf it's an elf on a shelf on a table chef peip says if he sees me opening up my Christmas gifts before Christmas he'll kill me well then just don't open your gifts before Christmas this stupid doll he's not going to do anything dude he's just as useless as Cody stupid doll he's not a doll Joseph he's a man with feelings and emotions and five jobs but but that's just a stupid elf toy it's not going to do anything wait that elf is not going to kill me no of course not he just said that to scare you yeah what is this stupid elf going to do huh huh what you going to do stupid elf yeah yeah what are you going to do stupid elf you're not going to do anything you got are right I shouldn't be scared of that elf let's open up my gifts before Christmas okay why don't you just wait a week and open them on Christmas I I didn't know your name was Cody on a shelf I didn't know you were that lame everyone everyone grab a gift let's open upstairs okay all right guys did everyone grab a gift yeah I got one dude this is going to be so naughty shh I don't want shfp to hear us come [Music] on all right guys what do you think these gifts are take a guess ooh let's see oh definitely Legos Legos that's so cool that they got me Legos Joseph what do you think that one is [Applause] hm just take a guess Joseph but I don't want to be wrong dude I'm trying to get it right you know it's your gift I just take a random guess uh you know what I don't even care what your guess is you know what I think it's a tennis racket well that's a dumbb guess what do you think yours is Junior um whatever it is I hope it's not fragile H I think it's a fortnite toy oh you better hope some tennis balls to go with this tennis racket well let's just open and see what it is okay guys I was right it's a fortnite toy throw throw burrito Cody you told me that was Legos that was just a guess it wasn't a fact wow dude I was so close with my tennis record guest that has nothing to do with tennis no no dude it is sports related so I was the closest guest no I was the closest guest I actually guessed that mine was a fortnite toy what Junior he's not from fortnite yes he was he was in the last season not everything is from fortnite what do you think Spider-Man's from fortnite yes and Batman and Rick and Morty what no Junior those things existed before fortnite no fortnite made those things hey dude can I open up your LeBron James and play with him yeah you can open it I'll open up my uh fortnite toy and play with it I guess I'll open up throw throw burrito oh man this toy is so cool the storm's coming oh dude LeBron's so stretchy hey Cody don't throw a burrit at me I'm sorry that's the name of the game that's what I'm supposed to do what if I threw this fortnite toy at you well that would actually hurt ow so you know what ow don't throw burritos at me you know what I was trying to hit throw a burrito at [Music] you wait wait wait wait was that noise what was that noise what was that noise sounded like a big bang let's go see what it is what guys someone knocked over my Christmas tree who would do that maybe it was the wind but we're inside air conditioners make wind Cody I wouldn't exactly call it wind what would you call it then oh so all the wind outside comes from an air conditioner duhh that's why it gets cold in the winter so there's just a big air conditioner in the sky yeah that's why they call them airplanes what what are you talking about they make the cold air Doh really looking like you want to kiss me right now Joseph just made up and do it I might just do it guys guys what if it was the elf it's a stupid elf it can't do that it's not real it can't push over a tree dude yeah Junior Joseph's right it's just a toy it probably just fell over on its own you know if a Christmas tree falls in the living room and no one's around to hear it does it still make a sound yes that's why we came in here to check out what the sound was duh idiot but but but we were around to hear it so if we weren't around to hear it would it have still made a sound you're right guys so that elf didn't do that maybe it did just fall over because of the wind so let's go upstairs and play with my toys so Cody how do you play this burrito game I think you just throw burritos at people there has to be more to it I'm going to read the rules guys the elf What I Know What You Did he spelled no wrong wa no that's how you spelled no but no it's supposed to be spelled k n o w that would be Cano no Junior when you're saying you know something it starts with a K this elf is illiterate stop making fun of his hi dude what do you mean you know what we did we didn't knock over that Christmas tree not not that what is that you opened your gift Before Christmas see sh is right he's going to try to kill us dude that elf isn't real I'm going to show you he's not real what are you going to do with him Joseph oh I'll show you what I'm going to do with him follow me dude there dude you don't have to worry about him ever again but isn't he alive he's a doll dude yeah he's just a toy well well then then how did those papers move the wind I told you that well then who wrote on those papers the win how many times am I got to say it okay I guess let's go play with those toys all right dude you won't have to worry about that elf ever again the is back I don't understand it how is this even possible how could he possibly have gotten out of the trash can I snap out of it Cody thanks Junior but how is this even possible he was in the trash can once you throw something in a trash can you can never get it back that's gross hand me that stupid elf I got to go through Extreme Measures hand them to me oh I'm getting real tired of you dude Joseph what are you going to do oh I'm going to cut him into pieces apparently he can walk but he won't be walking after this good thinking Joseph I don't want to watch oh I do I like seeing stuff like this missing limbs cut him Joseph okay dude there cut them in the [ __ ] pieces he's not coming back after that that was gnarly thanks for doing that Joseph yeah dude now let's go play with your toys okay well dude at least you won't have to worry about that elf ever again the elf is back how is this even possible dude that elf is alive he's real he's going to kill us we should have open up your gifts oh guys guys my Christmas gifts can help us kill that stupid elf shoot him fortnite guy Jesus Christ he's bulletproof uh Lebron James save us okay okay there's only one thing that can save us now throw throw burrito man I suck at this what do we do well I pissed my pants cuz of how scared I am I'm going to go home and change shorts oh Joseph what do we do we got to call the police dude let's call the cops that stupid elf hey there somebody call the cops yes officer that elf is trying to kill us what that elf that's just an Elf on the Shelf it's a little toy that parents pretend is alive to scare their kids or something wait so he's not alive oh no he's just a harmless little toy unless open your Christmas presents early then he'll kill you kill us can you protect us well why would I need to protect you it's not like you guys would open your Christmas presents early wait what's all this wrapping paper about we opened up Christmas presents early what are you [ __ ] crazy this thing's going to [ __ ] murder you wa it is oh yeah of course I get 911 calls all the time oh my son opened his Christmas presents early and our Elf on the Shelf murdered him oh go there has to be something you can do you have to protect us you're the cops oh I don't know kid this thing won't stop until you're dead I guess I could try arresting him yeah arrest him put him in the electric chair do whatever you have to do do all right but I can't guarantee that'll protect you all right Mr Elf on the Shelf or should I say Mr elf in the jail cell all right come on oh thank God that cop arrested him yeah dude I think we're safe what's that let's go see what it is what happened he was too fast he stabbed me in the armpit I think it went in my heart through my armpit what do we do there's nothing you can do you better watch out you better not cry you you better not pout I'm telling you why that elf is batshit crazy why did you have to open your Christmas presents early why no D we have to tell shipi oh no no no then ship will know I opened my Christmas gifts early how many more lives do we have to lose you're right let's go tell shpi chefi Jor send me he's getting killed by the L that'll show that stupid brat for opening his Christmas gifts early hey do you have that 20 bucks you were going to give me for helping you fake this I have to wear finish come on I'm not done yet I want to scare him a little more he seems pretty scared to me no I'm not done I got some more ideas you know I could be out saving lives right now come on giving a speedy ticket is not saving lives yeah you're right all right what do you want to do next Jose what did shfp say Chef peipi just got killed by the elf no not shpi what do we do there's nothing else we can't do junior we cut them into pieces we threw them in the trash can we called the cops wait wait we have to tell Santa tell Santa yeah the elf works for Santa so maybe Santa can discipline him you're right that's one of Santa's elves so it's Santa's responsibility to take care of his Rogue elves so how do we call Santa you can't call Santa stupid he he doesn't have a phone he's like the plug you have to write him a letter you're right let's write Santa a letter where do we write the letter to uh we have to send it to China yeah yeah cuz the North Pole is in China all the toys come from China that's right that's why all the to say made in China yeah okay okay let's write Santa a letter all right dude I wrote the letter Dear Santa one of your L's gone crazy please help also two years ago you gave me coal why did you do that not cool bro next time you do that we fighting on God how's that that's perfect Joseph thanks bro I really got the message across yeah I think you did too all right I'm going to go put this in the mailbox okay dude okay I hope it gets the s a quick all right Joseph I put the letter in the mailbox how'd you get ins time of the mailbox Joseph Joseph are you okay no dude I'm dead no what can I do what can I do to stop this I'm sorry oo oo you finally asked the magical question what magical question what can you do to fix this yes yes what can I do to fix this oh I could bring all your friends back to life but all you have to do is be a good boy until Christmas okay okay I can be a good boy all you have to do is clean up yeah clean up the entire kitchen no the entire house and and and make sure that you give Chef peee back rubs don't be a bad little boy don't be a total brat okay okay I won't be a brat I'll do whatever chef says yeah now go in your room and count to 30 and when you get done counting uh go to the kitchen and start cleaning everything will be back to normal okay okay I'll go to my room and count the 30 I totally got him oh Chef peipi you're really going to give me $20 for faking this yes Joseph yes I'll give you $20 thanks so much for cleaning the kitchen and being a good boy Junior yeah you know I'm just being nice and cleaning on my own I know I know but remember the elf is watching you so keep cleaning or he'll kill you oh I know I know hey Junior I changed my shorts what I miss oh um I made a deal with the elf that he won't kill me cuz he killed Joseph and he killed a cop so I have to keep cleaning or he'll kill me what I hate school what Cody what happened to your glasses dude you look like a freak oh yeah I got lasic so I don't need glasses anymore what's lasic well it's when they shoot lasers in your eyes to correct your vision but I don't need glasses now so now you guys can't call me four eyes well we can still call you a bugy freak yeah googly eyes well yeah I guess you could call me that but you guys are just jealous of my 2020 Vision you could only afford 2020 Vision you're so poor you bought 2-year-old Vision why didn't you buy 2022 Vision yeah get with the times dude but no it's not the year it's how good the vision is 2020 was a bad year Cody that's when the pandemic started you have sick eyes yeah get away from me dude yeah I don't want to catch your sick eyes okay whatever you guys see how dark it is cuz Daylight Savings Time ended yeah I hate when it's dark wa dude watch your mouth what's wrong with you yeah Cody what's wrong with dark well I just meant I hate when it gets dark outside what you got a problem with dark people is that what it is huh no I didn't say that wellow Cody you got those new eyes but you're still racist what's not do this again I thought you could see better all right class today we're going to be learning how fast is the speed of light it's this fast see that little tiny red dot it traveled at 186,000 m/ second or 11,1 160,000 m per minute or 669 M 600,000 mph that little tiny red dot fast as [ __ ] whoa that's so fast Cody that's how fast your mom would run to the buffet if she wasn't so fast oh dude she can still run that fast regardless of her weight yeah your mom's the fastest land elephant what land elephant is there any other kind of elephant well Dumbo could fly he was an air elephant but Dumbo's not real I'm looking at him right now with those big ass ears um teacher may I play with your laser device no Jeffy the laser pointer is a very dangerous device if you point it at someone's eye it can make them go blind so no you can't play with it it's not here I want to play with it all right crass this Daylight Saving thing is really screwing me up right now so you guys can go home class is over and I'm going to be putting the laser pointer right here okay right here no one touch it and I'm going to go home home and go to bed because it's dark outside so I won't be here to see if anyone touches the laser pointer that's right here okay see the laser pointer everyone right here right here it's going to be right here so don't one touch it I'm going to go home okay it's right here man we really shouldn't touch that laser pointer yeah let's go home yeah dude yeah I'm not going to take that thing so guys what do you want to do today since school let out early well it doesn't feel early in the day since it's so uh say it dude say it I dare you uh night time outside H nice sa hey guys look what I got the teacher said don't touch his laser pointer well I touched it and I took it but the teacher said not to touch it yeah Cody's right the teach's going to get mad that you touched it well I just want to play with it for tonight yeah I guess we could play with it for a little while but the teacher in shut up Cody we want to play with it for a little bit what are we even going to do with the laser Junior um I got an idea I got it ow Jesus my eyes ow I told Jeffy to do that why would you tell him that because you bought laser Li [ __ ] lasic eye surgery and you liked it so I thought you might want it again well that was a professional laser for fixing Vision yeah so I thought we could fix your vision by Shin a laser on your eye again no that's not how ow Jesus my other eye oh God now you have 2022 Vision Junior you're damaging my eyes I can't even see now oh you can see how many fingers can I hold up I I can't really tell ow Jesus did you see me doing that yeah I felt it hey Jeffy shoot me in the eye let me see how bad it oh god oh Jesus okay it does hurt yeah it it does actually hurt what's going on dude ow dude okay call a doctor hey there somebody calling optometrist and we got to make this quick cuz I got to go fly a plane in a few minutes cuz I'm delivering a whole bunch of donor organs to a hospital so today I am a a doctor SLP so what's going on our friend shined a laser in our eyes and we can't see okay well that's dangerous but I don't really have time to diagnose you with anything so I'm just going to give you all glasses glasses yeah I'll go get them from my bag all right there's your glasses now I got a plane to fly wow Cody now we all look like you well it's your fault for shining a laser in your eyes nice Cody impression dude thanks Joe I've been working on it you know I was really trying to capture his voice but I think I got it I see you've been practicing uhhuh I'm really good at it now where's Jeffy Jeffy hey guys look where I found with the laser it's a gig at me me me I mean a kitty cat guys I'm allergic to cats you you C don't sneeze on me you're getting all your germs on me I already caught your bad eyes I don't want to catch anything else guys can we just get away from this cat Jeffy can we return the laser pointer back at school because we already hurt ourselves with it okay you guys want to walk with me yeah let's walk with them to school walk it like a talking okay guys let's walk to school and return the laser God it's so night time out here oh what's wrong with it being night time you can't see me when it's dark do do I blend into to you no no I just think we need a flashlight I got a light that little laser is not going to help us see guys look at the full moon you want to see a full moon I'll pull down my pants Oh there's an airplane oh Jeffy you should see if you can hit the airplane with the laser okay PR are you hitting it I don't know man what a beautiful night for flying just look at that Moon what a big moon I wonder if it's really made of cheese ow ow Jesus my eye my eye I can't see mayday mayday I'm going down uh guys is that plane going down maybe it's just Landing yeah it's just Landing it crash guys did we make that plane crash no Jeffy made that plane crash by shining a laser at the plane he probably blinded the pilot guys there's no way this laser blinded the pilot it couldn't even reach that far yeah there's no way this cheap little laser could reach that far Cody the plane probably didn't even crash we heard the explosion what if that was a car crash on the interstate that exploded yeah what if a car hit a semi- carrying gasoline Junior we saw the plane going down well maybe it was a meteor with flashing lights on it no Junior that plane definitely crashed well listen it didn't crash until we have proof what's wrong Cody the news what the news [Music] look breaking news Okay a plane has reportedly crashed after a pilot was blinded by a laser pointer if you have any details on who could have done it call 911 immediately guys we did make the plane crash damn it I spilled my free medium french fries I get from McDonald's every week dude I'm out of here you know they always blame in the dark guy no Jessy get back here guys what are we going to do we we don't have to do anything jeffy's the one that shined the laser and you're the one who told them to do it I didn't have anything to do with any of this Jeffy can I see that what you your fingerprints your fingerprints ah Junior why would you do that because we're all in this together from the top We're All in This Together no no no High School Musical [ __ ] guys we committed a serious crime you should be singing We all committed a felony yes we did that's what you should be singing Cody now is not the time to be singing a song what well listen there's some serious stuff going on right now okay we have to get rid of that laser pointer I can hide it up my stinky rectal hole yummy okay so look now that we hid the laser no one's going to check up jeffy's butt so look no one's going to come looking for us cuz no one's going to know where that laser came they're not going to know what came from this house yeah I guess you're right they won't know where it is let's just sit back and eat some of your French fries eat Junior was at the doorbell no that was a smoke detector uh that was that was the neighbor's doorbell Junior eventually you're going to have to answer the door okay look I'm going to go answer it if it's the cops we're going to hide just keep that thing up your butt hello hey did you just hear that explosion that was me I was just in a plane crash oh how'd you get in a plane crash I don't know I was just flying and then all of a sudden a laser came out of nowhere and hit me right in the eye and I got all confused and I get up and down messed up and then like I just crashed right into the ground luckily I parachuted out at the last minute but I still bang my face up pretty bad on some trees well I I'm so sorry about that it wasn't my fault well of course not how would it be your fault hey can I come in and use your phone I got to call just just everybody the FAA I got to call Sully and ask him how he got out of it I got to call Tom Hanks and see if he'll make a movie out of this one I mean I didn't land on the Hudson but I mean that explosion was pretty cool well yeah you can use my phone okay okay so where's this phone junior is that the pilot yeah he was the one that was flying the plane that crashed junior he can't be here I'll tell you what happened shut up Jeffy uh sorry sir we just realized that we don't have a phone but you don't have a phone kid this isn't funny I was just in a plane crash I got to call some people yeah sorry but you got to go you got to leave wait wait a minute aren't you the kids from earlier that was shining lasers in your eyes yes Junior uh but we don't have the laser anymore yeah cuz you D my ass uh we don't know where it's at did did you kids shine a laser in my eyes while I was trying to fly a plane no no no the only thing we shine the laser at was our eyes and maybe a helicopter but not your plane so yeah no it's our teacher has a has a laser pointer on his desk at school and he pointed at things maybe airplanes huh I think I need to talk to your teacher Junior you're going to get the teacher in trouble better him than us all right guys we have to go back to the school and put the laser pointer on the desk okay Jeffy take the laser pointer out and put it on the desk who wants to go splunking in some cheeks no I do I do I'm a professional okay I don't want watch this m butt neckar just put on the desk come on let's go okay guys we did it yeah I guess we got off scott free who's Scott what you just said you got off a guy named Scott for free no no no no Scott free it's a saying what's it mean well I don't know who's Scott there is no Scott it's just a thing people saying then why are you saying something if you don't know what it means well I I don't know it's just like a common saying what if I just said random words that didn't make sense like ants beehive Bear tree well that that wouldn't make sense yes then there's no point in saying it so shut up okay fine so why did you call me here well word on the street is you have a laser pointer I do it's right here rookie mistake showing me the evidence you've been shining that laser pointer at any planes no I've been shining it at the board to teach my students how fast the speed of light is well have you been shown him the speed of light by shining that laser pointer at my plane no huh likely story maybe I should just check this out for myself oh god oh why does it smell like dookie I have no idea huh let me think about this h aha I have an idea I think you shine this laser pointer at my plane and then when the plane crashed you got scared and tried to hide it up your butt but then that got uncomfortable so you took it out of your butt and you put it on your desk no h liar all right you're coming with me so guys what do you want to do for the rest of the night well I guess I'm just going to go home my God the news breaking news Okay an elementary school teacher has been arrested as the person who pointed the laser pointer at a plane causing it to crash he'll be going to jail for a very long time wow Junior the teacher's getting in trouble now because of something we did we have to say something something Junior this is serious we just ruined his life okay listen Cody if we speak up we have to go to prison you want that well I think I could take it better than anyone else really you know in the butt listen I'm not saying anything I'm going to sit right here okay well I don't want to be a part of this so I'm going home what Jeffy can you believe him he really wants us to go tell the truth and tell the cop that we were the ones that shined the laser pointer and made his plane crash what wow I can't believe what I'm hearing what's going on well I just came here to give you the Triple T the truth tell a trophy because you told the truth about your teacher having the laser pointer that shot down my plane but now I don't know if I should give you this trophy it's sounds to me like you're a fiber oh no no I'm not a fber I'm I was telling the truth like look I promise I'm not lying well I can't give you the trophy until you tell me the truth okay okay listen okay listen we did take the teacher laser pointer and we shot it at your play on accident so can I have the trophy hm there's another very important question and I need answered so whoever can tell me the truth will get the trophy now the question is if you guys are the ones who stole the laser pointer why did it smell like [ __ ] cuz it was in my ass oh my God e e e e e e e you woo spring break woo all right craft now I know pring break STS tomorrow and you all can't wait to go to the beach and look at girls with big Barons w oh heck yeah what about the dudes am I right well no Baro for you instead you each get 500 pages of homework so your brain doesn't get foggy while you on pring Breck are you kidding me homework during spring break 500 pag of homework yay here you go I don't want to hear it crass stop complaining you can't Bri me with your good looks teacher I'm out of here homework during spring break just isn't fair it's supposed to be vacation turn J it's just homework learning is power all right Junior there's your homework I really have to do every single page yes cuz if you don't you fail this is going to be the worst spring break ever come on Junior it's not going to be that bad okay I'll do it myself here we go again uh worst spring break ever hey Junior how about we put all of our homework into paper shredder heck yeah let's Shred the stupid ugly homework hey Cody you want to shred your homework no you guys are going to fail you actually like doing homework yeah I'm already done you finished that quick fighting nickel for every time I heard that one but yeah it was easy well can I copy your answers yeah sure I don't even want to do that that's going to take forever okay I can't believe the teacher gave us homework during spring break I know Junior I hate our teacher I wish I could call him the stupidest meanest names ever and not get in trouble yeah I wish I could send him a long text message and call a bunch of names and and then not get in trouble well you could always just write up a mean angry text and then not send it to him what's the point not sending it he won't see it well you would type out all the stuff you want to say to him you know just to get all that anger out of your system and then just delete it before you send it oh so it's like it's it's like I sent it to him but I didn't really send it to him yeah exactly oh I want to do that already on it Junior oh what are you saying all right so far I got dear Jackie chew it's Jeffy you are a poo poo head I wish you are not our teacher anymore you suck at teaching and you smell like a dirty bathroom o tell him tell him tell him I think he's ugly or or he's sucked or something okay I have Junior also hates you too yeah yeah yeah yeah tell them tell them Cody hates him too wait wait but that's not actually accurate wait we're not actually sending it so so so what's what's the meanest thing what's the meanest thing you can say about the teacher I guess you're right uh telling me Stinky yeah yeah stinky yes say stinky tell tell him that he's stinky I want him to know that he's stinky are are you going to write that write down how stinky he is I want him to know that I think he's stinky say that those exact words that he's stinky okay Cody also thinks you're stinky yeah I do okay what else what else you saying oh I also have you're ugly stupid and dumb you have a PhD and sucking oh yeah I like that I like that let let me read it let me read it also put fish homework uh Jeffy what why is the text blue I don't even know J it did did he send that text I think he said it he said it Cody Jeffy you can't send text we're going to get suspended yeah why why would you send it I don't know I didn't mean to oh my God we we have to stop the the teacher before you see that text J Junior I I can't get suspended I've never been suspended in my entire life look we're not going to get suspended cuz the teacher's not going to see this text we're going to break into the teacher's house and we're going to stop we're going to grab his phone and we're not going to let him see it okay Junior what are the odds that he hasn't read it yet well well it says it's delivered it hasn't said he read it yet so let's go to his house and just hope he doesn't read it yet okay okay let's go guys all right let's go all right guys we're at the teacher's house all we have to do is go inside the house grab his phone and and delete the text before he ever sees it well how do we know if he's even home well if he's not home we'll just wait in the closet until he goes to sleep and grab his phone okay but how do we get in the house we just go in but it's probably going to be locked Junior people don't lock their doors of course they do people it's unlocked see Cody okay maybe this will be easy all right Jeffy just just open the door and don't touch anything don't break anything okay let's [Music] go that was sick what just happened I don't know why do you think has all these dominoes lined up I don't know do you think he has kids I don't know Junior do you think he's home well apparently not CU they didn't come running when a thousand dominoes just fell over let see where it went to yeah let's go follow him okay uh Cody it leads to this what the if this paper is wet someone broke in junior this is his security system his security system yeah it's like some kind of weird Chinese trap for bird what's it do well I think whenever he comes home and he sees all his dominoes fell down his paper's wet he's going to know someone broke in what do we do I don't know Junior he's clearly a lunatic I mean what does he do set this up every time he leaves the house I think we should just leave Cody if we leave then we're going to get suspended and you can't get suspended so so this is what we're going to do we're going to reset up The Dominoes remake a piece of paper that says that and refill up a cup with brown liquid he'll never know that someone came in his house but Junior that's going to take forever he'll be home by the time we're done the more talking you do the more time you can be setting up dominoes so start setting up dominoes all right all right Jeffy you're going to fill a c with brown liquid all right I do have to go to the bathroom so I'll be right back okay and I'm going to I'm going to remake this piece of paper almost done hey Cody is this good hold on junor I just have a few more of these I have to do I just got to get this place right okay you know what forget it I'm not doing this I'm done well check this C is this good it's fine wait what Junior you forget the e in someone no there's an E look no I see there's an e at the end but you forget the second e there's no second e yes there is there's supposed to be an e right in the middle no it's someone there's only one e no Jun there's an e in the middle after some that's what makes it someone and not Simone well I'm not redoing it and I'm not redoing the dominoes well let's let's go check on Jeffy fine all right Jeffy do you have your brown liquid sure do that's a brown solid that's a poop you just pooped in a cup yeah it was supposed to be a liquid oh well we can put water in there and then put it in the blender no no this whole plant sucks we so just leave and get suspended Cody we're not getting suspended we put too much time and effort in this plan well how do we even know he hasn't seen the text yet well he hasn't called us or replied so you would think if he saw it he'd be mad what are we going to do junior well here's what we're going to do we're going to clean up the dominoes and we're going to make it look like that he thinks that he didn't set up a security system before you left Jun you don't spend as long as I just spent setting up dominoes and forget you did it all right look this this what we do we have to have a chance so we're going to clean up the dominoes and we're going to make him think he forgot to set up a security system fine [Music] all right Cody we cleaned up all the dominoes yeah Junior I don't think this is going to work it's going to work Cody he's going to think he forgot to set up his security system he's not just going to think he forgot it takes a really long time to do something like that Cody you're worrying about nothing he's here he's here we have to hide hide hide hide what the did I forget to set up my security system again guess so see Cody it worked wow all right time to cook dinner h H now where' my dinner run off to uh dinner dinner where are you oh there you are dinner come here dinner come here dinner oh who's a good dinner oh a good dinner come here come here dinner come get the treat dinner come get the Tre dinner all right Bo I'm not going to eat this Treet all right well it looks like I'm having rice and egg rolls for dinner but first I need to sing the egg roll song to praise the egg roll God I rock the egg roll I rock the Egg Roll in my mouth in my mouth yummy yummy egg roll yummy yummy Egg Roll in my mouth in my mouth now let's enjoy some egg rolls Junior he's eating and he LIF his phone on the kitchen counter we should go grab it guys I found your fortune cookie I'm going to eat it you making a lot of noise shut up Jeffy Jeffy shut up who that noise oh that was close too close sorry guys you're not going to eat that foring cookie all right Cody I think you should go get the phone me why because it was your idea to send that text message I didn't say send it but it was your idea to type it in the first place so you go get the phone fine yummy what was that [Music] noise [Music] all right guys I got the phone you got it yeah let's go let's go all right Cody delete the text okay and done it's deleted yeah okay let's just put the phone back and he'll never notice okay come let's go oh you've got to be kidding me how did he even have time to do this in true us you break it into my house no no no cuz the paper's wet which means you break into my house no no we're not breaking in we we were walking outside and we found your phone on the ground we wanted to return it to you oh thank you so do you do this every time yep I set it up every single time I shut the door it's my security system oh okay I'll see you later wait just a minute do you kids mind helping me set my security system back up oh hell no

Channel: Dr. Junior

Views: 2,923,039

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Id: 0Y3jzFFjT_A

Length: 188min 43sec (11323 seconds)

Published: Fri Nov 24 2023