REPLICAS - Keanu Reeves didn't deserve this...

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replicas the worst sci-fi i've seen in a long time i like to think of myself as someone who loves sci-fi even the movies that have some flaws i look past them because i love the genre there are some movies like pandorum for example that have some flaws but i can look past them because i just really enjoyed the movie and i thought that might be the case for replicas as well i like the matrix i think keanu reeves is kind of cool in some movies in others he's a little bit lackluster and in this one he's not great at all he's really bad actually but yeah i've enjoyed keanu reeves in a sci-fi before so i thought hey replicas is probably going to be pretty okay at least he's got keanu reeves he's got sci-fi how can it go wrong but dear god it went wrong not all of them can work out right guys so it starts with our boy keanu in a research facility he's a neuroscientist and his name is william foster i'm just gonna call him keanu because he just plays keanu reeves in this movie so he works for this company called bio9 and basically they're like a cloning facility this film takes place in the near future and in this world people can donate their bodies when they die to this testing facility where they try and imprint your consciousness into a robot so this dead donor guy shows up seven hours after dying time since cardiac death uh seven hours 15 minutes they put this helmet thing on him and it shoots a needle into his eye and somehow they upload his consciousness i'm not sure if the quality of the brain would degrade or not i mean seven hours after death is a pretty long time but hey i don't know the science behind it so i'm just gonna run with it for whatever reason keanu reeve starts explaining to everyone that works there what they're about to do like oh we're gonna transfer this guy's consciousness into this robot even though you all work here and you all already know this we are going to take his biological brain replicate the human mind and they reveal later that this is one of many failed attempts it's spoken they've done that before this one spoke and i can't tell you how amazing that would have been eight months ago so obviously these people know what's going on so basically he's just explaining it to the audience it's very nice of him then check this out this man is dead so then keanu starts using this fancy sci-fi computer headset thing to imprint the mind of this guy into the robot the imprint fails the mind refuses the body and starts destroying itself why didn't they restrain the robot especially if they're imprinting someone who has military training sergeant you've transitioned like if anything goes wrong they have control of a robot's body that's kind of a safety hazard but okay so keanu's boss man gets mad at him because he's like oh my god i can't believe you failed again we're gonna lose funding then keanu's like oh i'm this close to getting it right well that just isn't close enough is it bill obviously there's some weird moral implications here you know you're messing with someone's mind after they've already died making them go through some more suffering you know confusing the [ __ ] out of them because they're not sure what's going on and his wife brings this up and she's like are you sure this is okay it actually spoke it spoke if it could speak then it could feel his wife's a nurse so he's like but you try and save people at the hospital how come i can't bring people back to life and force them into a robot how many times have you had a patient flatline in the er and you brought them back my patients don't rip themselves apart i know they're donors but it's pretty clear from this guy's reaction that they're not really sure what's going on how would this company get donors to begin with do they just not tell these people what happens to everyone else oh and by the way there's like a 99 chance that when you come back you're gonna freak out and beat yourself to death just sign here if you're fine with that so this guy who kind of looks like knockoff mark zuckerberg is keanu reeves friend and very close friend because he just kind of waltzes into keanu reeves home and he's like hola foster family he's like keanu's boyfriend almost like keanu secretly gay for ed because he constantly spends time with him in this movie ed even stays at keanu's place when they leave for vacation and i wouldn't be surprised because keanu and his wife have literally zero chemistry why does one have to be cut short but that doesn't matter because five minutes later while they're driving kiana's wife gets impaled by a branch yeah they just barely miss a truck and then they swerve off the road and hit a tree and then go into a lake his wife is dead and all these kids just drown in the car because he's just sitting there like an idiot as the car starts going under the water the car hits multiple objects but for whatever reason none of the airbags deploy this is the worst vehicle in existence what car company is this because their safety inspector sucks it was probably tyler jordan from fight club you know that would make more sense so keanu's entire family just dies and he is completely fine he's very lucky his acting is atrocious in this scene this has got to be one of the most traumatizing things that could happen to anyone ever and he's acting like his lego millennium falcon just got destroyed [Music] and it's so funny because when the rain is falling on his dead family if you zoom in on his wife you can see that she's clenching her eyes because the water is getting in them so obviously keanu is going to want to try and clone his family so he calls his boyfriend ed ed comes over and ed tries to talk sense into him but he's like no we gotta do it it's happening no matter what and that's like all right well you call the shots you're top anyhow so no way i can't they are not gone not yet keanu is very clearly the dominant one in this gay relationship because ed does pretty much everything somehow he takes care of the bodies off-screen and then he steals a [ __ ] ton of lab equipment from their facility as if no one would notice that and then they put them in keanu reeves basement and they start cloning his family and keanu doesn't even compensate ed in any way for helping him like he doesn't give him any money doesn't do anything i mean if you want this dick then you're gonna have to continue helping me or you're gonna have to find someone else so they run into a big problem ed could only find three cloning pods there's only three parts do not tell me there aren't four but there's four dead family members so keanu's like all right i'm gonna write all their names on pieces of paper and put them in a hat and choose one and that's the one that i'm not gonna clone even though he could clone three and then just use one of the pods and clone the last one afterwards you know but we'll get back to that and he tells ed to pick a name like you've already put so much on this guy just leave him alone so he picks his daughter zoe so she's not going to be brought back ed states that he could only bring three cloning pods because that's all they have but when we see him at the lab later on he walks past these cloning pods so obviously there weren't just three of them maybe he was getting back at keanu because he was you know mistreating him he's like ha i'm gonna make it so he can only bring back three even though he works at the same place and he would definitely know that there were more than three so then ed's in the basement doing all the math you know trying to figure out how they can do this even though keanu has a higher position than him he's the neuroscientist shouldn't he be the one figuring all this out isn't he the smart one why is he making ed do everything what they utter a bunch of science mumbo jumbo to make it seem authentic when it clearly isn't you gotta watch the levels the levels are everything you need to watch the levels the pods can't lose power and that'll throw off all the levels and i just told you how important those things are apparently it'll take 17 days for his three family members to grow in the pods what about zoey why couldn't you just clone zoe once the other three are finished and keep those three in like a comatose state you know keep them asleep or something and wait for zoey to be finished cloning then you'll have your whole family but instead kian's like oh there's nothing i can do i guess zoey's gone so i'm going to try to erase her completely from my wife's memory and from my kids memories i guess he just didn't think about all the people that know zoe like he can't erase their memories so keanu uploaded all of his family's consciousnesses onto these hard drive things they're huge i'm not sure in this futuristic world why they would be so big i mean usually when society advances in technology things get smaller right not not bigger but what do i know so then keanu goes into his family's memories while they're sleeping in the pods and deletes zoe completely that's a handy ability you got there just to go into someone's mind and erase this little bit of their memory very specific bits and if you're deleting zoe completely that would be kind of a monumental task it would be kind of impossible actually because you'd have to delete every single moment your wife remembered her and your kids and zoe's what like three years old or something for so you'd be effectively deleting like four years of all these memories built up with zoe that's a lot of time that you're just erasing from someone's mind how would this not cause an issue and more importantly how can you have science that can do this but you can't put consciousness from a human body into a robot body how that would be easier just doesn't make any sense to me but i obviously am not a scientist so i don't know for sure and how you can even upload someone's mind into like a hard drive after they're already dead is beyond me but wouldn't it make more sense if the donors had their consciousnesses like uploaded while they were still alive and then updated as they grew up you can't take data out of a mine that's dead it's also silly sci-fi so maybe i'm just being too nitpicky so these two policemen knock on keanu's door and they asked him if he knows anything about someone stealing all the car batteries from all the cars around the area and he's like no i don't know anything about that did they get you two no no they didn't ah you're the lucky guy how'd they do this without anyone noticing why wasn't there a single scene of that happening and do car batteries just like conveniently work with these cloning pods okay what do they connect them up with jumper cables so ed goes to work while keanu is at home just chilling you know working on his family because of course ed has to go to work he gets yelled at by the boss man the boss man's like oh if we don't get this thing working and if keanu doesn't come to work this whole thing's going to be shut down i'm sure he'll be in soon you know william he's got a really strong immune system so one of keana reeves son's teacher shows up randomly at their home and she's like well what happened to matt where'd he go i've been calling the mom and she hasn't been answering okay then leave a [ __ ] message you weirdo why are you showing up at their house so then ed's like oh yeah he has chickenpox and he went to live with his grandparents his grandparents are dead ed i'm not gonna explain that how did you not know that ed you're so involved with this family you'd assume that would come up in conversation at some point how the hell did you not know i mean you guys were [ __ ] each other in the ass you would assume you'd talk about some personal stuff sometimes maybe that's crossing a boundary for keanu so while his family is incubating in these pods keanu tries to fill in for his family's absence talking to his dead kids friends online giving them all sorts of excuses why they haven't seen each other in a while so keanu tries and fails and tries and fails to upload the consciousness of his family into the clone bodies ed comes over and he's like bro it's been 17 days the clone's gotta come out now he says they better come out or they're gonna keep aging in a couple of days even if you do figure this out they will have aged years wait why why would they keep aging your son droopy old man sack if they're cloned shouldn't they stay the same age as they were and how come the mom takes just as much time to clone as the kids when her body is much larger so they take all the clones out of the pods and put them in their beds so he's got them all sleeping and he's trying to find a way to upload the consciousness of his family into these clones but they're all sleeping right they're all in a comatose state if he can keep them that way why wouldn't he keep them that way for another 17 days so he can bring zoey back too why'd he give up on her so easily it's so silly what another 17 days isn't worth your daughter's life okay i mean yeah that is kind of a long time for his kids to stay home from school and whatnot but they've already stayed home from school for 17 days just say they all have like chickenpox pneumonia so then keanu makes a big discovery it's not the brain it's the body we just have to trick the synthetic mind into believing that it has its biological actual flesh and blood body the reason the human mind was not being imprinted successfully over to the robot body was because you need to trick the mind into believing it has a human body or else it'll freak out right it needs to think it has lungs and a heart and all this stuff you know the brain will freak out and shut down because it thinks it's dying that was the problem are you telling me they just figured this out what that's something that you would figure out before testing on the first subject are you kidding me of course the brain needs to think that it has a human body what you think is just gonna shove someone's consciousness into a robot and be like all right just leave it it's fine these are neuroscientists why wouldn't they think of that until now it's absurd and if that's the reason the imprints were failing then how come it was failing on the clones the clones have human bodies right so that problem shouldn't arise then right so what was the problem then i'm what so he tries imprinting on his wife again and it miraculously works so keanu's clone family is acting super strange they're trying to acclimate to their bodies so they're acting really weird i'm assuming that's why i don't know exactly how cloning works but if they're cloned shouldn't they act exactly the same way if they have the same consciousness i mean what would be the difference i mean they should be freaking out that they can't remember anything mom this look went sour did you go shopping i just bought this the other day also clones don't carry over any body modifications like tattoos or piercings but his wife still has earrings it's so dumb also there's a part where keanu like grabs orange juice and he's like oh let me pour that for you and he pours it all over the table by accident but no one seems to notice and in the next shot they showed the table but there's no orange juice and then keanu's son starts pouring syrup all over his pancakes right and then we get a shot of keanu's wife on a run we return to the kitchen and wow all the syrup is gone off of this kid's plate they just slurp it all up or something being a clone makes you do some weird stuff i guess so another donor comes in and keanu is like oh i don't want to [ __ ] this up again so i'm just gonna go to the bathroom real quick put the headset on myself and upload my consciousness into this hard drive yeah so he explains this really stupid signs like oh i'm gonna use my alive brain data as a baseline to simulate the human body and then i'm going to put like the dead brains on top of it for the consciousness so the consciousness will connect with like the data of the body and be like okay well i have a body so it's all good so you tell me they never ever tried this on a living person before just get like a bum off the street and give them five grand and boom you got your test subject and not to mention not all bodies are the same right they're all different shapes and sizes like say i'm a [ __ ] donor right and my [ __ ] brain thinks i have a [ __ ] body and they put my [ __ ] brain into a robot body with keanu reeves regular body as the bass line my [ __ ] brains you'd be like what the [ __ ] why is my body all of a sudden so huge it doesn't ah it would not work so his wife finally realizes that she doesn't remember the last two weeks i don't remember what i had for dinner last night i don't remember leaving the clinic for christmas break or the last like five years right because zoe was erased but let's just forget that and what about their crashed car how did he explain that to his wife like the car just vanished did he sell it in a day without telling her is that what he told her like why wasn't she like oh where's the car you know she would remember the car i'm assuming and what if someone finds the crashed car like he didn't plan for anything it's so stupid and this guy's a neuroscientist he's so smart but he so keanu's daughter has a really vivid nightmare of her mom dying in the car accident obviously because it really did happen oh mommy's mom dad like oh [ __ ] that's not good so he sedates her brings her into the basement hooks her up to the headset thing and starts removing the memory of the crash so you're telling me he removed all the memories of zoey but he didn't think about removing the memory of the crash like the incident that made all this stuff happen to begin with he didn't erase that part what you would assume that be kind of an important memory to erase so while he's erasing soapy's memory his wife comes downstairs so did she just happen to wake up right now and go downstairs like oh i wonder what he's doing at this exact moment or was she awake this whole time and he was just an idiot and did it anyway while she was still awake you know what it's okay so obviously she questions him she's like what the hell are you doing to her william tell me the truth he could have just said yeah she fell in love with a boy at school he broke her heart so she wants me to remove the memory of him boom there you go perfect excuse and i thought about that in like one second but instead he's like you know what she would love to know the truth and that excuse would totally work too because if he's wiping her memory obviously she wouldn't remember so she couldn't say anything against it yeah i was like you know what it's too late i can't think of anything so might as well just tell her that she's dead that she's a clone that all of our kids are clones and they're also dead and she instantly believes him too like what upon hearing this crushing news right his wife just immediately accepts it i'm dead she's like oh makes sense yep we all died and we're all clones yeah okay like what wouldn't that take some processing i think anyone that heard that would reject it at first they'd be like um no you're insane that can't be true and then they'd mull it over in their minds and then you know maybe make some connections here and there and then be like oh my god i can't believe it and then slowly begin to accept it i mean she has a little cry over it so i guess that's enough so they all go shopping for a christmas tree and their kids are like oh i like the fake christmas tree and his wife's like i don't like the fake christmas tree because it's fake and it's not authentic huh get it no i hate those ones they're fake a little bit on the nose there with the comparisons but i guess it works and obviously ed is with them because ed is always with them what does he have no other friends he doesn't have a family of his own dude get a life play some video games or something watch a movie stop spending all your time with this person's family it's awkward you're making things weird so then at dinner keanu's kids are like why is zoe carved into this thing who is zoe who because uh keanu is a complete idiot i'm not crazy i remember photos in the upstairs hallway so keanu's wife starts to piece things together she realizes that there's photos that are missing and she questions why there's a bunk bed and this is how a brilliant neuroscientist responds to these questions that thing that happened there might be some things so the boss man comes over to keanu's house and he's like i know what you've been doing subjects 346 347 348. i know that your family has died in a car crash and that they're all clones he's like all these clones are bionine property what so keon didn't do anything to cover this up were these clones recorded in like a bio9 database somewhere how stupid is this guy he's like oh work will just never find out about this somehow apparently the boss knows about all this stuff because ed spilled the beans on everything that keanu was up to so while the boss man is talking to keanu at his house he says something like oh imagine all the stuff we could do if we could find a way to imprint a consciousness into anything the mind of a hacker loaded into the virus now that would be crazy right it's so so stupid what would that accomplish loading the hacker's mind into a virus just give them a keyboard and a mouse and they're perfectly fine what so the hacker's gonna load into the computer like a white blood cell and fight the virus like within the computer so the boss man threatens keanu's family he's like you better say your goodbyes because they're bio9 property and they're all going to be killed so then the boss spends like bring me your hard drive with with your consciousness in it even though i just threatened to kill your family i completely don't expect you to run away right now so keanu comes back with the massive hard drive thing he tries to sedate the boss man but he fails so he smacks him with the massive hard drive and then he wraps it in tin foil and puts it in the microwave so it it burns the boss man has these guards waiting out front but they kind of just mosey around they don't do anything they just kind of stand there so keanu and his family drive off even though the boss man's guards are literally right there so boss man eventually wakes up and he finds the hard drive in the microwave he's like oh damn it that's so annoying i'm disappointed bill boss man's guard takes out like a 2005 ipad here look at this one toshiba handy book and he's like hey look i know where they're headed so apparently there are trackers in the spines of all the clones and keanu works here right how did he not think about the trackers in his family did he not think about removing them you know before starting the cloning process i guess not i mean that's kind of weird right i mean even if ed didn't spill the beans on you they would eventually find out because there's trackers in your family so that obviously means there's a link to bio9 they would have like your family in a database somewhere like tracking them but this is yet another oversight by keanu so what they do is they travel to the hospital they get in there just fine with their entire family and the wife's like i know what we can do let's put a defibrillator on the kids and myself and the electricity going through our bodies will destroy the trackers and the moms like if we put too much electricity through our kids they'll die but let's just do it anyway i guess so they do it and they destroy all the trackers i'm not sure how they knew that the trackers were destroyed but they just got lucky i guess and the kids aren't questioning this at all they're like okay yeah just shock me that makes sense who are we running from again who knows they don't even know that they're clones this must be so confusing for them but they don't ask any questions that they're like okay this makes sense let's go put this thing on me shock me all right let's keep going so keanu and his family drive to a dock with a bunch of boats tied to it keanu jumps the fence and he finds ed's boat and he's like all right time to find the keys so we can all get on this boat and sail off into the sunset or something i don't know what they plan on doing just running away forever for whatever reason his family just stays in the car you assume that they would follow him to the boat but they don't like why are they still sitting in the car they would have to jump the fence eventually to get to the boat right if he had the keys to the boat but they just stay in the car so that's weird well the reason they stay in the car so boss man's guards can show up and steal them away and keep keanu there so they do that and kyon's like oh [ __ ] they took my family that's [ __ ] annoying so keanu drives to the facility and he's like what the heck guys that's like totally not cool that you stole my family this is when we find out that ed snitched on him i was supposed to get rid of the bodies your bodies but i couldn't do it i'm sorry this wasn't supposed to happen like this this got way out of hand it's all right boss man then kills ed to send a message to kyanu that's very weird why would you kill one of your valuable employees you know he's a very smart person i mean you could have even used his mind in your tests or whatever but yeah sure shoot him instead of one of the three clones that are standing here that you're going to kill anyway that makes sense and wouldn't it be far more effective to kill one of keanu's family members that he spent all this time bringing back right that would probably send a much better message and you wouldn't lose an employee over it i mean they were probably gonna fire ed anyway but what about ed's parents well ed probably doesn't have parents because he's never anywhere but with keanu so ed doesn't have any family or friends so yeah fine just kill him so keanu's like hey don't don't kill me or i won't give you the algorithm it's in my mind and i can somehow put it into a computer again doesn't that require like the headset thing don't they need to poke his brain with the needle and upload his consciousness again to do this i guess not how did he just like memorize the data and recopy it whatever just don't think about it it's science so keanu uploads his data to this robot it breaks free from its useless restraints so that's obviously why they weren't using restraints in the beginning because they're useless it runs into the room where the boss man is and it says jones i'm here for my family so the robot is also keanu so there's two keanu right now there's robot and the real keanu and the robot cgi is so awful it throws a cgi body and it looks terrible like really bad the cgi is atrocious if the consciousness in the robot is keanu why would it just like accept what's going on right now you know wouldn't have to like wake up and be like okay who am i where am i what's going on why would it just like instantly break out of the seat and be like all right i need to save my family it's very strange maybe keanu programmed it to do that face don't explain any of it and it's so annoying it's not upset that it's a robot and it has no soul and it's just a copy of another person that has a family you know if it's keanu's consciousness shouldn't it love keanu's family as much as keanu does and it kind of sucks knowing that you're a robot and the real you has your family right and you can't do anything about it but yeah sure i guess if i randomly woke up as a robot i would do what real me tells me to do because whatever my life's meaningless that wouldn't [ __ ] me up at all boss man is fatally injured and he's like yo bro if i die someone's just gonna replace me and make your life a living hell so keanu's like you know what i can do i can put the helmet thing on you clone you and then put your consciousness into that clone and we can just like make a deal right you can let me live as long as i save you sooner or later they'll find you not if we work together phil are you negotiating so they put the helmet thing on boss man they clone him then 17 days pass and look keanu finally created zoe why he didn't do it in the beginning who knows but here she is now very cool also for whatever reason his kids don't question any of this as strange they're like okay well i guess we have a sibling who just randomly popped down nowhere and she's like four years old that makes sense let's just bounce around because we're so happy look we're a happy family so i guess keanu quit his job and lives with his weird clone family now who will all die prematurely because clones have a much shorter lifespan than like an actual person but i guess don't think about that so the bad guy wasn't defeated the evil boss man he just kind of comes back to life and he's able to do all this shady [ __ ] with random people's consciousnesses to make millions of dollars because keanu was really selfish and wants his clone family and guess what robot keanu gets to do for the rest of his life which is like you know forever he gets to work for boss man hell yeah now that's an existence i would want all work no play makes robot keanu a happy boy he never gets to see his family he just gets to slave away constantly oh bill it's time to go to work you'd assume that if it's a human consciousness it would have human desires but i guess not love companionship what's that i don't know so i'm gonna do this new thing with my reviews from now on i'm going to give three recommendations so for this video here are three sci-fi films that i think are amazing and you should check out good morning sam do you want me to cut your hair lunar industries [Music] [Music] thank you so much for watching if you know of any other really awful movies that you'd like me to review leave them in the comment section down below please make sure to check out alienclothing.com you can get cool shirts like this wow so fashionable there's a lot of really awesome shirts over there so go check it out thank you so much for watching guys i'll see you in the next one and always remember science doesn't need to make sense because science [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Music] [Music] uh
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Channel: Elvis The Alien
Views: 1,467,065
Rating: 4.9164572 out of 5
Keywords: replicas, elvis the alien, elvisthealien, movie review, keanu reeves, hilariously bad, replicas movie, replicas review
Id: P2jVXigWqhA
Channel Id: undefined
Length: 32min 13sec (1933 seconds)
Published: Sun Feb 09 2020
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