Prometheus (2012) KILL COUNT

[Music] welcome to the killcam where we tally up the victims in all our favorite horror movies I'm James Agee nice and today we're looking at prometheus a 2012 prequel to the original alien quadrilogy prometheus was made by Ridley Scott who directed the first alien film back in 1979 and you'd think with his return to the series this movie would be a slam dunk unfortunately I found it pretty mediocre and frustrating and at times it even felt like I was just watching that first movie all over again only without any Xenomorphs that's because Ridley Scott and co-writer Damon Lindelof showrunner of lost didn't want Prometheus to set up any specific story line from the old movies and instead were more interested in only visually referencing those films so for Prometheus's aliens they wanted all new creations although sometimes they end up feeling like b-grade Xenomorphs and why make new shit if it's all just crappier versions of old shit looking at you most remakes so although this movie's got a hell of a cast from the OG Lisbeth Salander to everyone's ideal James Bond and it looks absolutely beautiful from all the sweeping landscape shots to the way it perfectly combines practical effects in CG I just couldn't fall in love with Prometheus I think the best thing I can say about it is that it's very ambitious it really wants to engage with lofty even biblical questions like where did we all come from and what does it all mean too bad the movie ultimately forgets to be entertaining and mostly leaves you yelling at the characters for making stupid choices thankfully we all know that stupid choices often lead to people dying let's find out how many victims there are and get to the kills [Music] the movie begins with gorgeous shots of an ancient Earth's landscape played by northeastern parts of present-day Iceland great acting there Iceland an alien figure walks towards a spaceship hovering over the real-life data Foss waterfall and takes off his robe - oh my god that is the most ripped being I've ever seen hee ho this dude gives mr. universe a new meaning watch old traps Arnold as his transport leaves this engineer consumes a weird-looking substance that breaks him down at a molecular level causing a horrific disintegration that looks pretty damn cool and fun fact the VFX house that did this effect Weka also created the snap-in infinity war you know what that makes sense oh and by the way I'm not putting engineers on the kill Cal yes I know they're as humanoid as they come but if I make it a precedent to include them I'll be screwed when I get to covenant anyway with this dudes genes going every which way these aliens just said let there be title card earth life let there be life we jumped to 2093 we're a science vessel named prometheus it's cruising through space and just as a refresher the original alien took place more than a hundred years after this in 2122 walking around the prometheus is David a very obvious Android character played by potentially real-life Android Michael Fassbender he just looks so perfect how could he be real David's the only one awake right now and spends his time doing trick shots learning human languages and soaking up human culture but don't let his Lawrence of Arabia inspired aesthetic for you David knows how advanced he is and is pretty damn resentful of all the lowly meat bags he has to watch over after nearly two and a half years of traveling time the Prometheus is finally approaching its destination spelling an end to david solitude the first human to awaken all on her own is Meredith Vickers a Weyland company woman played by bona fide action superstar Charlize Theron David gets everyone else up out of their sleep pods and all of a sudden we've got a ship full of characters to me hey look it's that douche from fallen Kingdom trying to make friends with that whispery villain from Mission Impossible and right over there is Liza Erin most exciting for me though was interest Elba playing the ship's captain Yannick that dude is the coolest mothafucka alive man Vickers holds a meeting to brief the prometheus screw and part of her presentation involves a holographic tape made by the recently deceased Peter Whelan who this movie says is the founder of Weyland core so I guess we're just retconning away Charles Bishop Weyland from alien vs. predator but hopefully the scar Lexx relationship is still canon Peter Weyland is played by guy Pierce and disgusting lizard man looking makeup and he introduces the rest of the crew to doctors Elizabeth Shaw and Charlie Holloway a pair of archaeologists who were also in love Shaw's played by Noomi Rapace of the Swedish Girl with the Dragon Tattoo series while Holloway is played by Logan Marshall Green who would go on to be in more horror films like the invitation and Leigh Whannell ZUP grade Holloway says that ancient artifacts collected from throughout the ages all point to the same constellation of stars that's too far from Earth for any of these early civilizations to have known about unless aliens the constellations got a plan is the planets got a moon bing-bang-boom that's where the prometheus is just arrived at the satellite known as lv 223 fight field that Sheamus looking geologists back there asks Shaw what she thinks they'll find we call them engineers you mind them pollution engineers they engineered us although the holographic lizard man had said Sean Holloway were in charge of this mission Vickers brings them to her penthouse looking room which is actually a separate module of the ship complete with a tanning bed looking med pod thing to tell them not to be mistaken she's the boss bitch around here huh yeah no kidding look at that power space pan soon Prometheus descends towards the satellite and enters its atmosphere which is noted to be very high in co2 and lethal for humans to breathe so yeah this place is dangerous but it also looks damn pretty as they fly through its sky say what you will about these characters or the storyline Ridley Scott knows how to shoot a film I especially love this valley they fly into which is made from an actual desert valley in Jordan combined with a background shot of some mountains in Iceland awesome in this valley the Prometheus crew spies an alien structure so Yannick sets the ship down nearby and everyone takes in the view he had that's worthy of a head smooch push out a ground team suits up to look like Terran Marines and David joins them in the outfitting even though he'd be fine without a spacesuit he explains that he does it so he won't make any of the meat bags uncomfortable making you guys pretty close not too close ham david's got some people problems they head out in a Land Rover and a couple of ATVs and eventually enter the hollow alien temple as others such as Yannick and Vickers watch on monitors from back aboard the prometheus inside it's looking pretty og alien in there mr. Scott but at least we get these cool ex bomb looking drones that set out to map the alien cave system around them and transmit the 3d map back to the Prometheus I don't care who you are that's cool technology they get to a rainy shaft where they see that the co2 levels are so low they don't even need those fishbowls on their heads anymore there's something generating an atmosphere cleaner than Earth actually I mean that's cool and all but maybe still wear that shit in case of alien bacteria or something then again I'm not a spacefaring scientist so what the fuck do I know right these helmetless Yahoo's walk around some more before David find some ectoplasmic goop on the wall and then somehow beep poops the right combo of bit pops to start a light show in the hallways that depicts a bunch of holographic engineers running for their lives what the hell is that I don't know y'all you tell me seems like some kind of security footage from the past or something because after they see one engineer get decapitated by a door they walk up and find its body right where the light show left it 2,000 years ago finding hard evidence of alien existence is too much for five fields so he and biologist Milburn played by Rafe spall leave to head back to the ship after they leave David once again somehow BIM BAM the door open wait we don't know what's on the other side oops sorry I thought Threepio wasn't sufferable behind the door they find Olmec he of the hidden temple as well as that engineer's head and a whole bunch of vases although I'm a little annoyed at how this looks like that room from alien only with vases instead of eggs I've got to give props to Prometheus for building so many fully sized kick-ass sets they built them at Pinewood Studios on the famous double-oh-seven stage the single biggest film stage in Europe which as its name suggests is where they shot a bunch of James Bond movies the team begins to explore not noticing these little wormy guys on the ground before an incoming storm outside causes the Prometheus crew to call them back as the scientists bagged the decapitated engineer head David sees some black tar looking goop emerging from the bases and steals one of the urns without anyone else noticing they reboard their land vehicles and try to outrun the storm back to the Prometheus and despite the head mishap and the silica storm catching up to them David is able the Batman then back aboard the spaceship where they're mostly safe and sound there's only one problem turns out Fifield and Milburn never made it back and instead got lost in the alien tunnels how did the crew aboard the prometheus watching them on camera allow them to get lost I have no idea but with the storm raging outside these two are gonna have to bunker down for the night the scientists sterilized the engineer head and discover that it's cabal looking visage is actually just a mask and that the engineer's real head looks pretty damn human underneath this should be a pretty big deal two alien vans we've known these gigantic elephantine engineers since the original film but most people just assume that that's how they looked and not that they were wearing a helmet or anything now we're learning that that figure the Nostromo crew found is actually one of those super buff engineers like the dude we saw by the waterfall earlier Sean gets the genius idea to what cattle prod the brain stem I think we could trick the nervous system into thinking it's gonna live sounds like a fun time for a sadist but they do it anyway and after the head wakes up and starts bleeding all over the place it eventually explodes like a peep in a microwave yeah David sorry we're not all perfect Androids like you they examine the mess leftover and discover that the engineer's DNA exactly matches human DNA so Wow I really don't have a good excuse for not including engineers on the kill count other than inconvenience but I'm still sticking to it David meanwhile opens his new base to find odd I don't know but it's slimy as heck whatever it is wait is that a crab leg wait is that a crab leg lava lamp how many chuck-e-cheese tickets does that cost he cracks it open and takes some of the black liquid out so he can get creepy with it big things have small beginnings David finds Holloway playing pocket pool and getting drunk since he's depressed that all the engineers are apparently dead he wanted to ask them important questions like why did they make people and why should anyone care if you put pineapple on a pizza Haven tours the sad sack another drink and spikes it with that black liquid but Holloway doesn't notice and drinks it down like a good little meat bag he goes back to Shaw's bong where she shows him the DNA results and they celebrate the discovery by having back in the alien temple Fifield in Millburn come across those alien bases which are now all leaking that black goo out of a tar pit sprouts a couple of dyin ogre looking creatures called hammer peds which are the results of those worms we saw earlier getting infected by the black goo and which were made using a combination of good CG and practical puppets on the cabling system Melbourne is a total fucking moron and approaches them like their kitty cat even though they look more like an ugly nutsack at the end of a veiny dick Tim the Alien movies are phallic one of them sprouts frills like a Dilophosaurus and attacks Milburn because of course it's going to you stupid jackass and when Fifield tries to cut it off he gets sprayed in the face with alien acid blood his visor melted to his skin and he falls face-first into a puddle of goo while the hammer peeve crawls into Milburn's helmet and then right down his throat to choke him to death the next morning Holloway wakes up not feeling great with eyes so red not even clear eyes could help and clear eyes is awesome a bunch of the crew heads back to the temple to look for Milburn and Byfield and end up in the base room where those urns are bubbling like the Clampett swamp they find Milburn's body but no sign of Fifield and before they can look for him further Holloway gets so sick from David's alien juice cocktail that he can't even stand on his own anymore David himself has been on his own side quest this whole time and finds a giant room with a quadrant of caskets and the squishiest control panel I've ever seen man I want to press those buttons because he can apparently fluke top any alien device ever he successfully activates another holographic memory showing that the engineers love to get down with the jazz flute Hey it also shows David how to use this room for holographic space maps look at me I'm a star I can see why this is so much fun he's got the whole world in his hands the whole world in his hands when the light show goes down David realizes that one of those caskets contains the apparently last living engineer and that's enough to give him a creepy Android smile the crew gets back to the prometheus but since Holloway is looking almost as bad as reptilian guy piers Vickers refuses to let him board because it might mean contaminating the ship you know the same exact dilemma Ripley had in the original goddamn alien movie we've all already seen but Holloway is actually in so much pain he doesn't even want to keep living so after croaking to show that he loves her baby he tells vicars to do it to it Lars and she does that boy goes up looking like that let it burn Elmo give and he succumbs to the flames right there on the ramp of the Prometheus as vicars and Shaw reacts with shock and hysteria Shaw wakes up in a med bay to david askin if she and Holloway had bone lately what they forget to program some tact into you buddy cuz that's pretty damn personal but he's asking because she's pregnant and it looks like the baby's three months along even though the supposed consummation only happened last night not exactly a traditional fetus she demands that David removed the fetus but he refuses and drugs her instead because David's no longer a tweener he's a full-on heel motha fuckas after he leaves Shaw sneaks off on her own to vicar's his med pod and hops inside to get an emergency c-section emergency section before that baby upset belly bursts sir the machine removes an egg sac with a swig like creature inside called the trilobite which kind of feels like Ridley Scott wanted a new chest burster that wasn't quite a chest burster for some reason still the trilobite looks freaking awesome it's another practical creature that uses a cabling system to move around and it was designed by Neal Scanlan who also made the hammer Pete and other creature effects in this movie and whose work was last seen on the kill cow when I covered Jurassic world fallen Kingdom I love this dude and his team's animatronic effects and the fact that they made this alien embryo using a condom always used a prophylactic show us links under the trilobite to escape then shuts it inside the med pod and gasses it with a D contaminant that she hopes will kill the creature spoiler Pig dozen in the cockpit Yannick sees that five fields helmet cam is suddenly right outside the ships don't forget doing anything cautious let's just open the pod bay doors Hal and see what's going on hope he's a zombie or something a ki-adi-mundi looking zombie he's actually more of a Ciotti mutant and mutant Fifield kills five dudes while jumping around and screaming like a monkey the first dudes a nameless mechanic whose helmet is shattered with the backhand the second dude Wallace it's a real brutal pill when fight filled jumps on him and bashes his helmet and face open the third do Taplow successfully lights fly field on fire only for the now flaming mutant to jump off the top rope and crack his helmet open with the body slam the fourth dude shepard is killed by simply being thrown against a transport and the fifth dude verdict gets an axe in his back while trying to escape and then is also tossed aside the survivors get into a rover and run over the mutant fight field like he's a xenomorph and the nasty boys put down for good after Yannick and his pilot champs unload on it with a flamethrower and a shotgun it's a pretty solid action sequence and I respect the hell out of fight fields actor Sean Harris for actually doing all these cable stunts and getting lit on fire a bunch of times but I hate how mutant fight field looks so much like a zombie it's weird to have that in an alien movie then again it could have been worse one version of the sequence involved a fully CG character who just looks way too much like an animal to me on her way to a human centipede costume contest Shaw stumbles into a room where it turns out that crusty old Peter Weyland is actually still alive how fortunate for us more of the Sawyer family grandpa seriously it looks like Palpatine fucked a California raisin it's gross Whalen's been in hypersleep this whole time but now that David's found a living engineer oh yeah Shaw bt-dubs your geysers waylynn wants to meet one and see if it can save it save you from what death cause but these engineers might not be in the saving time since Yannick tells Shaw that this place isn't their home it's a military outpost they were using to develop weapons of mass destruction like the base is full of oily black goo wait WMDs and oil prices all sound familiar still Shaw wants to at least meet the last living engineer you know see if they click or whatever so Yannick tells her go ahead as long as that black goo stays off the ship Weyland is affixed with fancy robot legs and its back to the temple we go so exciting these back-and-forth trips on their way to the casket room they pass through a storage area filled with thousands of those vases and when Yannick sees this he re-examines the holographic map of the structure and realizes that the part they're in is actually a croissant good shit Oh a goddamn shit sorry look like a croissant to me this wishbone shaped ship is a juggernaut the same type of ship in the stromal crew found on lv-426 that held all those xenomorph eggs that led to Kane's face Huggins that means this casket room is actually a bridge and David hops into the captain's chair to kick things off with some jazz flute he says this ship's engineers were accidentally killed by the black goo virus right before they left to pay earth a visit why sometimes to create one must first destroy them oh man our makers were trying to destroy us it's revelations all over again David pops open the casket like it ain't shit and out Rises the last living engineer played by the over seven foot Ian white who we just saw as the predator in the ABP movies he's the dude who also does all the Game of Thrones stuff to play the last engineer white had to undergo more than four hours of prosthetic application overseen by makeup artist Conor O'Sullivan the engineer don't give a fuck about Weyland or his questions and instead just grabs David by the neck and makes short work tearing the androids head off haha many beats down Whelan with it awesome Shaw runs away while the engineer adds two kills to the cow Kate Dickies medic character named board and a security officer named Jackson both kills pretty lame but at least Waylon gets a decent death just kidding he says there's nothing and then dies of his injuries from getting head beaten his death witnessed back on the prometheus by his daughter Vickers oh yeah turns out she's his daughter they revealed that a couple of scenes ago it doesn't really matter though to be honest the engineer squats over a green Hollow globe and that brings up a giant telescope looking command seat that he hops right on up into this is another pretty cool image to see since again this is where we originally saw an engineer back in the first movie and even puts this pachyderm helm on great the ship boots up and causes a whole bunch of old faithful steward ground cracks open because guess what's about to take off oh it's the juggernaut bitch shower radios the Prometheus and tells Yannick that the alien ship is about to head to earth with that deadly goo Yanik reluctantly tells his co-pilots Ravel and chance to set a course for ramming speed and although Vickers ain't bout to go down like that Yonex bridge boys agreed to stay with him to the end the juggernaut takes off and Prometheus chases after it Yannick throws Vickers a bone by ejecting her separate module penthouse suites on the Prometheus which has a bit of a crash landing on the surface and then Vickers herself launches out of the ship in a personal escape pod which thankfully has a bit of a smoother touchdown then the Prometheus kicks it into overdrive and the boys put their hands up like they're riding their last roller coaster ever the resulting crash gives us a wonderful giant fiery explosion that claims the lives of captain Yannick and his two co-pilot and yeah maybe there were other crew members on the ship but thanks to this movie slapdash editing and storytelling I don't know for sure so I can only count those self-sacrificing bridge boys the juggernaut crashes to the ground for what is probably this movie's most maligned scene one I was already familiar with before I ever even saw because after that croissant starts a roll in towards Shaw and Vickers they run away from it in a completely straight line yeah just staying under that thing's shadow like it's the goal of some shitty Mario Party mini-games why would you not turn 90 degrees and run to safety you fools after Vickers trips to the ground Shaw finally gets the bright idea to roll her ass on out of there but it's too late for mr. Whelan's baby girl who gets crushed to death by the runaway ship at least Charlize Theron acted the hell out of this role up to the very end the ship tips over and although Shawn narrowly avoids being crushed she's not out of the woods quite yet as evidenced by the subnautica warning her soup gives her she makes it over to vickers his penthouse module but after closing the door and stabilizing the atmosphere she hears a nasty noise coming from the modules medical wing has turns out her c-section trilobite has been surviving and thriving this whole time things only get worse after David radios her because he's somehow still functioning to tell her she's got a visitor coming knock knock daddy's home the giant engineer attacks her but she hit the button and releases the Kraken and the now very large trilobite pins the last engineer down as Shaw crawls away from the fight between her god daddy and her alien love child she gets the heck out of that life pod right as the trilobite opens its mouth or mouths I don't know and sticks a nice big tentacle down the last engineers throat great news for people with alien men / octopus fetishes rule 34 continues to hold up David radios SOG and to tell her he can get them off the planet if she puts them back together since there are other ships around and he knows how to play that alien jazz flute she agrees to his plan as long as he'll fly them not back to earth but to the home planet of the engineers so she can ask them why they were gonna be such dicks and destroy all the wife on earth they had helped to create in the first place the movie ends with another juggernaut successfully launching into space as shaw delivers a ripley like voice log so this movie can repeat one last thing from the original hallway then there's an extra scene where we see what happens after the trilobite infected the last engineer the bald beauty's body gives birth to a well apparently it's called the deacon which again just kind of feels like they wanted a not xenomorph creature even though this thing is very obviously a knockoff see no more how many people died at the hands of zombies and not Xenomorphs let's find out at the numbers fifteen people died in prometheus at least as far as we could see the victims consisted of 13 men and only two women and surprisingly for an alien movie no Androids he lucked out there Fassbender with a runtime of 124 minutes we had to kill on average every eight point two seven minutes I'll give the golden chainsaw for coolest kill to fight field as long as I can count the helmet melting transformation along with this much simpler mutant death if you think I can't do that well then here it goes to Wallis cuz that death was brutal and kind of came out of nowhere doll machete for lamest kill will go to Vickers because even though some other kills were pretty lame none of them were as head-scratching lee stupid as this roll of death and that's it Prometheus came out in 2012 and its sequel alien covenant works as the second part of the alien prequel trilogy we'll look at that next week but until then I'm James a Jenice this has been the kill count thanks a lot for watching this week's kill cap I won't think some patrons like true killa James Bayliss Christina's Handley at Thomas Jacobson y'all know I love the alien series so I was excited to finally watch Prometheus I just wish it was a little bit better man and spoiler covenants still not great what do you think of all those new creatures they look cool right thanks everyone be good people

Channel: Dead Meat

Views: 6,934,209

Rating: 4.9077892 out of 5

Keywords: horror, dead meat, movies, scary, films, kills, kill count, body count, james a. janisse, jaj, pine commander boogie, prometheus, alien, engineers, aliens, engineer, ridley scott, franchise, sequel, prequel, series, xenomorph, michael fassbender, science fiction, scifi, sci fi, jon spaihts, damon lindelof, noomi rapace, guy pearce, idris elba, charlize theron, logan marshall-green, review, behind the scenes, bts, making of, DMKC

Id: VVdWDlr2hMA

Length: 23min 58sec (1438 seconds)

Published: Fri Mar 15 2019

Reddit Comments

[u/ROBOT_B9]

The origin of The Prometheus School of Running Away From Things.

[u/DaMudkipper]

Never saw this movie but I was getting annoyed with James on this one. Holy hell that running from the ship was bad.

EDIT: I meant annoyed at the movie with James, as in I was feeling his frustrations as well

[u/FriskeyVsWorld]

At least the movie looks absolutely gorgeous?

Sigh.

[u/TheKazarka]

Handsome Squidward, the movie

[u/kirant]

Random thoughts I had watching this:

• If it wasn't for the insanity it would cause, I kind of now want someone to do an Engineer kill count for Covenant.
• James had an insane amount of fun with his Giorgio Tsoukalos impression, didn't he?
• You know, seeing the behind the scenes development of this movie gives me a unique respect for it. The script makes the characters unbelievably dumb (they are somehow dumber than I remember them being...and I already couldn't think of a character really acting rationally in this movie), but they sure went all out to make sure things looked pretty.
  
• I've always had a soft spot for the trilobite (I guess that's it's name). It always looked so bizarre that I could buy it being the result of an alien bioweapon.

[u/hellaquin]

It’s a gorgeous looking film, but I spent the majority of it like ????

[u/Khalbrae]

Sadly I don't see any places to stream it but there are TONS to rent/buy it digitally.

[u/Esquilax21]

I would like to think that the "He's got the whole world in his hand" joke/line is a reference to Bray Wyatt

[u/Nintenfreak005]

I cant be the only one who thinks the alien guy is freaky.