Pet Sematary (1989) KILL COUNT

[Music] welcome to the guild cow where we tally up the victims in all our favorite horror movies I'm James Agee nice and today we're looking at Pet Sematary released in 1989 and based on the 1983 Stephen King novel I read Pet Sematary last year when I heard about the upcoming remake it's really depressing in fact it wasn't even published until five years after King wrote it since he was so reluctant to have such a dark story released I absolutely loved it but this 1989 screen adaptation not so much you'd think that with the screenplay by mr. King himself it'd be just as good as the memorably morose source material but instead the movie kind of just lurches around like the undead beings it depicts staggering from plot point to plot point until we finally get to the admittedly cool final sequence that cemetery is about a doctor named Lewis Creed who's just moved his family to love domain their property includes a path to a pet cemetery where family animals have been buried by generations of grieving children a dead pet is one of the saddest things I can think of but as we'll hear many times throughout this movie sometime oh yeah I forgot to mention that Fred Gwynne Herman frickin monster plays Louis's neighbor Judd Crandall he's the best part of the movie especially the way he does Judds heavy Maine accent that was a big part of the character in the book how many victims will this movie put in the ground let's find out and get to the kills I out [Music] the movie begins in the titular Pet Sematary which has gotta be the most depressing place you can think of just a bunch of dead kitty cats and good boys no thank you especially since this one's got a serious singing kid Bravo it's getting late their kids don't you got to get home to danny elfman the pet cemetery is near this house that was recently sold to the Creed family Lewis Creed is a doctor who just got a job at the University of Maine he's played by Dale Midkiff who kicks off this role with a bill Lumbergh impersonation yeah his wife Rachel was played by Denise Crosby you know from one of those star tracks and together they have a flippy daughter Ellie and an adorable two-year-old named gage ho and a cute gray kitty cat named Church can you say Church gage good boy ha ha what a happy family Ellie has a minor's higher swing accident and while her parents are tending to her scraped up knee baby boy gage gets a little too friendly with the trucks on the road in fact this precocious poopy butt walks straight into the road and might have been squashed if not for Jud Crandall the Preet family's new neighbor they thanked him for his baby scooping and asked him about a trowel they've discovered on their property yeah that's a good story good walk I'll tell you that sometime later that night Louis goes over to Judds house to share a beer and watch the trucks go by yeah that's one main road on they talked about the road and how that trail leads to a pet cemetery and honestly the huge chasm and acting ability here is almost painful to watch there's that damn road uses up a lot of animals dogs and cats mostly when little girls get a cat Winston Churchill comm Church for short oh sorry what were you saying about Churchill there dude I nodded off trying to listen to you yeah Dale Midkiff seems like a nice enough dude but his performance says Lewis Creed kind of sinks this movie for me it doesn't help that he's in so many scenes right alongside Fred Gwynne being the best the next day as promised Judd takes the Creed's up the trail to the pet cemetery Rachel immediately hates the place because she's got some hang-ups about death I mean who doesn't right but John reckons that kids gotta learn about death somehow oh yeah he even buried his own dog spot here in 1924 cool graveyard Judd but what's with that dead fall over there or should I say undead fall dun-dun-dun the cemetery trip gets Ellie scared about Church dying so hopefully this dude can convince his daughter that Church will be fine Church will be fun yes ain't nobody buying it with that sales technique no wonder she ends up crying about it what the fuck ever though Ellie gets to go to sleep with Church tucked in right next to her what that's the cutest thing I've ever seen Lucy why don't you do that at bedtime to make church less of a wild cat the Creed's intend to get him castrated even though Ellie's against it apparently she learned that kind of language from Missy the Creed's housekeeper who has plenty of reason to swear since she's got a bad case of stomach cancer she refuses Louis's offer to take a look at it though and he leaves for his first day at work after kissing his wife and adorable song goodbye wow that is one cue baby too bad mooses first day at work is a disaster since this teenager named Victor Pascal was brought into his office with half his frickin head still back there on the sidewalk he had this kid is deader than a possums plate I I mean Louis even does the movie I closing things and look you can see his freakin guy Ryan shit yep a hundred percent definitely a kill don't worry I wasn't wrong Victor's just popping in from the afterlife real quick to tell Lulu that the soil of a man's heart is Stonier whatever that means and he's not done ghosting around yet cuz later that night Lewis gets a midnight hour wake-up call we've got places to go Willis reluctantly follows the ghost boy in short shorts out to the trail where they're piping in a fog machine real nice and evenly great work there Jimmy when they get to the pet cemetery Victor instructs Louis never to go further to where the dead walk yeah and that blue zone back there we color-coded it so you could see it better Lewis crumples to the ground as Victor floats away with a warning the barrier was not meant raus and then lewis wakes up I bet he's thinking it was all just a dream huh yeah maybe if dreams left her feet dirty idiot yeah you grab that hair and mild confusion eventually it's Thanksgiving season and Lewis is staying home while Rachel takes the kids to her parents house without him because apparently his in-laws just don't like him that much I can see why though first thing this dude does when he's a bachelor mode is to dress up like an Adam Sandler SNL character he gets a call from Judd to come over because his cat may have gotten hit by a truck oh man I hope that's not the case that would be a very emotional moment for anybody yep that's sure sure or I guess just an everyday matter of fact I'll spare you the shot of Lewis peeling his dead cat off the frozen ground because nobody likes to see a dead cat least of all Elleni who lewis knows is gonna be a wreck when she finds out jug feels bad just thinking of how sad she's gonna be so he says that mebbe doesn't matter why he takes Lewis to the pet cemetery and says that they're headed to the blue zone whoa oh just yonder over that land damn there I uh Lewis is reluctant because of his dreams Ami's warning but he follows John anyway because come on who wouldn't want to hang out with Fred Gwynne as much as possible during their lengthy journey through the woods they hear a big ol scary monster growl but judge dismisses it as just a loon that's all that growl is probably a nod to the Wendigo the being that cursed these burial grounds in the book hopefully the one to go will have a bigger part in the remake coming out John takes Lewis to what he says is a Mi'kmaq Indian burial ground and although the whole concept of Indian burial grounds has some issues with it be sure to check out our podcast on the matter with special guest joey cliff at least this place looks cool I guess production had to make it using bulldozers on a mountaintop so no wonder they invested in these sweet aerial shots Lewis is told that you have to bury your own so while Judd sits by and smokes a whole pack of cigs Lewis spends all night digging in the stony soil until he can finally plant his bag of cash don't forget to water it now when they're done judge tells Lewis not to fill in his wife or daughter on what they did that night they have to keep this a secret just between the boys in there man hearts the soil of the land noises Stonier whoa that's what that dead kid said the other day does that like a lyric or something Lewis calls his daughter and Dale Midkiff tries to convince us that he's trying to convince her that everything's okay yuck kiss your own cat maybe next time let's get a little bit of that baby acting though wow he is cute as all get-out no wonder baby actor Miko Hughes would go on to be the kid a new nightmare five years later in fact while kid characters are often played by twins Ellie Creed for example is played by a pair director Mary Lambert insisted on casting Miko even though he didn't have one because she knew he'd be the best three-year-old actor they could hope for the next day Church shows up and scares Lewis right into a Three Stooges routine lousy cat why I oughta upon closer inspection of this adorable little kitty actor Lewis notes how bad Church smells and sees that he chewed his way out of the bag he also finds out that new church isn't a nice kitty Lewis beers it up with Judd and asks him why his dead cat has come back to him so Judd transitions into a flashback to when he was the little kid and had buried his dog spot in the mi'kmaq grounds only for the dog to come back all growly and me the grave Lewis saw in the regular pet cemetery was when Judd buried spot a second time and where he thankfully stayed buried immediately Lewis asked the most obvious question has anyone ever buried a person up there no well sorry Judd I was just asking okay apologies to everyone who apparently finds Dale Midkiff super hot which is a surprisingly large number of people cuz I'm a skip over his little tubby time scene and get to when he picks his family up at the airport what right there on the tarmac about that kind of meeting was only 4x presidents and AG's Ellie tells Lewis that she had to dream about Church getting killed and buried in the pet cemetery but Lewis gaslights his daughter and tells her nah that shit ain't real oh yeah Lewis they want Church smell like dumps to ass he's snap yeah I hate jumps to a smell to kids in case you forgot this was a kill Cal let me remind you with a real random Missy the housekeeper can't stand her stomach cancer pain anymore so she hangs herself in her basement yeah it's completely out of nowhere probably because this character was written in to replace Judds wife who is a whole nother heaping scoop of sadness in the book oh and speaking of the book here's the guy that wrote it mr. Stephen the king king who cameos as a minister at Missy's funeral let me get an idea for the master oh yeah mrs. death inspires Ellie to ask her dad what he thinks happens after you die I think we go on yeah yeah nailed that line Rachel on the other hand still has a hard time dealing with death and she tells Louis why in a flashback story when she was young her sister Zelda had spinal meningitis and was kept in the back of Rachael's house like a dirty secret Zelda's physical deformity is scared Rachel a whole bunch and to make matters worse rachel was the only one home when Zelda died by choking to death on some food Denise Crosby gives an excellent dramatic voiceover for this scene in fact it's the best acting in the movie done by anyone who's not Fred Gwynne or the baby they'll say you hated her Rachel and that was true and I'll see you wanted her to be dead and that was true too she gets a bit hysterical after reliving that trauma but Lewis knows it's nothing that can't be fixed with a little valium and a force push some time later the Creed's and Judd are enjoying a nice afternoon flying a kite up to the highest times I love the expansive nature you see in this movie in fact unlike other Stephen King adaptations up to this point Pet Sematary was actually filmed in Maine upon Kings insistence in the tiny town of Ellsworth about half an hour away from Bangor where King lives unfortunately for the Creed's this idyllic Maine existence is about to be invaded by a semi truck which is headed towards their home being driven by a dude who's way too busy rocking to the Ramones to pay any much attention to the route so it'd be great if the cribs could keep an eye on their youngest instead of getting distracted by Ellie and her sailor mouth [Music] alas few things are more entertaining than a little kid swearing so the parents aren't watching its gage chases the kite string closer and closer to the route John finally realizes what's happening and what follows is legit one of the most tense and difficult to watch scenes ever especially after Louis trips and you know he ain't gonna make it cuz he doesn't engage creed the only kid to ever rival Andy Barclay and cuteness gets run down by a big rig holy shit that is intense and it Garner's the most impressive performance out of Dale Midkiff when he screams no and anguish [Music] this movie's got plenty that doesn't impress me but damn that moment is powerful the funeral is pretty painful to watch too since Louis's father-in-law punches him in the face and their flight causes the casket to fall and expose a bit of dead baby arm there dude I am a hold myself that dick just punched me at home Ellie complains that God should make gage come back jug tells her it doesn't work that way but he already knows what Louis must be thinking you know just by logic it out it's not like he could read anything in Louis's blank space there are we sure he's not the one who died and came back yeah Lewis is already considering another visit to the mcmac burial ground even though the last time he did it didn't turn out that great that cat ain't Ron Jud wags his finger and Lewis for even entertaining the idea and admits that he lied when he said no one had ever buried a person up there before you another flashback this time telling the tale of Timmy Bannerman who was killed on his way home from WWE's dad bill Bannerman buried his Purple Heart earning son in the mi'kmaq grounds and before you know it Timmy was up and about eatin legs and pulling a real Romero on all the ladies in town the coming to get you main girl because Timmy was a face flushed air and abomination Judd and his buds wound up going to the Bannerman house to be a real bunch of Al Furman they burned the building down in an attempt to kill the zombie but since Timmy wasn't done hugging his dad quite yet bill ended up dying in the house fire as well I'm counting bill but not Timmy since we never knew human Timmy before he died off-screen so his kill didn't really happen in this movie did it and as far as Undead Timmy goes well I'm not gonna count zombies at all because that is one dangerous precedent in any case looks like a whole lot of problems were caused by bringing back the dead sometimes yeah you could say that again Judd sometimes that is better i I didn't mean literally but sometimes ok we got a dude Rachael decides to take Ellie to her parents house in Chicago while Lois hangs back to tie up loose ends regarding gays Ellie doesn't want to leave her dad alone though because she's been getting dream warnings from someone's tax cap packs cow what does that like the new bovine mascot for Penny Arcade it's a real sad moment for Lewis as he watches his family get on the plane right is that is that sadness yeah maybe zoom in real hard and see if we can find any emotion there anything no still nothing not forget it in Chicago Ellie keeps getting dream visits from Pasco telling her that Lewis is gonna do something bad she relays his zombie dream warning to Rachel through a bunch of snotty tears but Rachel just can't figure out what the hell pack scowl means laughs Pascal was she saying Pascal haha her phone a friend lifeline was a dead guy that's ironic don't you think recognizing Pascal's name she tries to call Luis and when she's unable to reach him her mother tries to quell her qualms yeah you know how was guys be when the wife is away it's meat-eating time she calls up Judd interrupting his muster dinner and asked him to keep an eye on Luis which he agrees to do aya hey it's not like it's a hard task for the guy it just means relocating his beer drinking and cigarette smoking to the front porch during all this Luis has broken into the cemetery and by now has dug up gages casket after cradling the corpse for ammo he heads home to bury that boys sneaking past job with ease since the old feller wound up sleeping on the job oh yeah Luis carries gage over the dead fall and into the blues Oh which is extra active tonight with the sounds of roaring and maniacal laughter what is that place freakin Arkham it's also got a whole bunch of fog and falling trees so maybe don't go camping in the Blue Zone yo hey you know what we keep hearing all these evil roars could we maybe get a glimpse at the beans who produce them oh shit never mind dude they can go on just being noises Bobby meanwhile Rachael has been having nightmares about her sister Zelda and starring in her very own sitcom called my friend the ghost because all of a sudden Victor Paz cow is a comic relief spirit man I've had it with these motherfucking ghosts on this motherfucking plane Victor's comedy craps all over this third act as he delays a gate closing for Rachel's transfer flight and even helps her rent a car what the fuck I will say however that his makeup is very good and I even have an extended fun fact about it you see the makeup effects in this movie were primarily done by two people Lance Anderson who had worked at Stan Winston studios and helped out with effects on the thing and his son David Leroy Anderson who would go on to win Academy Awards alongside Rick Baker for doing makeup effects on men in black and the Nutty Professor David also designed most of the monsters and cabin in the woods and some notable TV horror creations like twisty the clown from American Horror Story and the red devil from scream queens and I'm not quite done with this fun fact yet because Lance and David founded the makeup and design company a FX studio which is now run by just fucking wait for it David and his wife Heather Langenkamp Anderson aka Nancy from a Nightmare on Elm Street he hair y'all Nancy Thompson helped create all those nightmare monsters and cabin in the woods so it's kind of crazy that Miko Hughes here ended up playing Heather Sun in new nightmares because she would have married David right after he did all the makeup on this movie poor is the freakin best man okay back to this movie in opposition to pass cows benevolent spiritual guidance is the cemetery itself whose powers caused Rachael to get a flat tire on her way back home it's trying to stop you do you hear me it's trying to stop you yeah the cemetery has its own powers or maybe it's the Wendigos curse I don't know man it's a Stephen King story just roll with the magical realism rachel gets herself out of this pickle by hitchhiking down the same kind of truck that killed her baby sure you don't want to wait for the next ride lady Lewis berries gauge in the mi'kmaq grounds and goes back home where he collapses in the bed without even taking his dirty ass shoes off his baby plant sprouts right away and walks all the way home in his little muddy shoes his zombie calf faithful yet aside Paige goes into his dad's medical kit and takes out a scalpel a perfect weapon for him since it's like a butcher knife but baby sighs John wakes up from his beer nap and follows some muddy baby footprints into his house where he's tormented by baby giggles and toddler threats jug goes upstairs and while he's distracted by Church the accomplice cat gage comes out from under the bed and slices into jugs Achilles tendon Oh a damn that's some hostile shit all of a sudden this movie gets super bloody as angry baby gage falls upon John with a scalpel and slits his mouth open hi-yah then after the old man collapses to the ground gage sinks his baby teeth into jugs neck and has himself a little flush feet ripping out judge throat to seal the deal on this gnarly kill that zombie baby is ruthless yeah Rachel gets home and thankfully Pascal says he's not allowed to go any further so he stays in the truck and disappears goodbye we won't be missing you dude instead of going home rachel is drawn to Judds house by gages baby giggles but once she's inside it's a different noise she hears moaning from Zelda who she finds crouched in the corner of a room threatening to twist Rachel's back and leave her paralyzed don't worry Rachel Zelda's not actually there it's only haha oh stop engage what who's dressed this kid up like a thrift store Mad Hatter he's actually dressed like a portrait and Rachel's family home I guess the evil spirit did that to better emotionally manipulate the poor woman oh and look the portraits got a little church looking cabinet - that's nice gage says he has a present for mommy and approaches her at maximum cobbler speed and because we hear a stab and Rachel scream I'm gonna put her on the count right now murdered by her own little undead child Lewis wakes up in a pratfall the next morning Wow how did he not gouge his eye out there and seize evidence that gage has returned and looted Lewis's man bad he gets a call from his undead son and it's honestly super unsettling Louis heads over all wide-eyed and angry to Judds house where he wins church's trust with the state only to grab this poor cat actor by the scruff of its neck and stick it in the butt with some poison huh oh man this cat actor's death acting is making me feel bad and Louis's taunting isn't doing anything to help lie down play dead with one zombie taken care of Louis heads into the house which is all of a sudden covered in mold for some reason pretty fuckin whackin to you but if you think this is random and crazy just wait for Pet Sematary to you ain't seen nothing yet the mold spell only ends after Lewis picks up Rachel Cinderella she and with the house back to normal Louis prepares to wreak ill his son he goes upstairs and finds Judd seriously fucked-up face for real man when this movie gets so hardcore and then walks into the hallway where he gets boo scared by his wife's hanging body yo how'd a baby get a full grown ass woman up in the attic like that oh maybe cuz he is scary baby doll now oh the doll fell down and now he's back to human back to doll back to human scary doll that's fun gauge slashes and stabs that Lewis with the scalpel before his father manages to toss him to the ground cuz like you know he is still a baby when gage goes to get him again Lewis just grabs the toddler and sticks him in the neck with his good night juice ah poor gay oh my God look at those big watery eyes that kid is the cutest little murderer I bet oh did that kid just hit his head gage dies once again and Louis takes a metal can of gasoline to the entirety of juds house he lights it all up and burns it all down even the baby doll he once called the son for this house fire they actually built a two-story facade on top of a real house that they fireproof and then they just burned the shell down pretty cool Louis doesn't leave his wife's body to burn and not even Victor and his above the finger tip shorts can convince the grieving widower to stop his crazy plan of walking through ghosts or of burying his wife in the mi'kmaq grounds what do you have to say about that Victor too bad Louis carries Rachel down the trail and buries her off-screen and that night she breaks out of her grave while Fred Gwynne Mary it's a nice little wrap-up poem man Rose what he can and he tension does what you buy what you owe Rachel gets home all bloody and dirty but Lewis don't mind he down to get gritty with it ha no dude watch the pot the movie ends with Rachel grabbing a knife and killing Lewis with it although we don't get to see it since the movie cuts to black before it happens but he does scream so I think it's safe to count it how many people were left better off dead let's take Lucy and find out at the numbers I up eight people died in Pet Sematary not including cats or zombies or zombie cats the victims included three women four grown men and one little baby boy but you know no extra pie wedge for that with the runtime of 103 minutes that left us with a kill on average every twelve point eight eight minutes I'll get the golden chainsaw for clueless kill to judge obviously the effects here are just more exceptional work from the Andersons great family to marry into Heather you're in the wrong business if you don't love bill Dahl machete for lamest kill will go to Missy who just couldn't hang in there with the stomach crabs and that's it Pet Sematary came out in 1989 and there's a remake slash reinterpretation of the book coming out in just a few weeks on April 5th there's also a mass shit crazy sequel starring Clancy Brown that we'll look at next week but until then I'm James a JD's this has been the kill count thanks a lot for watching this kill count I want to thank some patrons like justice Maddox Wilberg Gabe shield Avante Parchman and Joe Croft I also wanna thank Lucy for being the best little kitty cat Thank You Lucy also definitely want to thank my assistant editors brie and Zoran for all the work they do and Clara who does my graphics over at my YouTube network made in May then actually sent me this custom golden chainsaw trophy for hitting 2 million subscribers seriously Kevin keith amelia brad michael everyone there thank you so much and everyone else be good people

Channel: Dead Meat

Views: 7,780,174

Rating: 4.922276 out of 5

Keywords: horror, dead meat, movies, scary, films, kills, kill count, body count, james a. janisse, jaj, pine commander boogie, stephen king, original, remake, reboot, adaptation, book, novel, mary lambert, dale midkiff, denise crosby, blaze berdahl, miko hughes, fred gwynne, herman munster, zombie, undead, living dead, church, cat, baby, truck, road, semitruck, maine, steven king, pascow, victor, cemetery, pet cemetery, pet semetery, pet sematery, pet semetary, pet cemetary, DMKC

Id: AwJNj-EGWTk

Length: 25min 5sec (1505 seconds)

Published: Fri Feb 22 2019

Reddit Comments

[u/sgt_asshole]

ayuh!

[u/ShiftyBea]

People in the comments are saying "Do Pet Sematary 2!" Do they actually watch the videos?

[u/ShiftyBea]

I am putting this here because this is the video in which this happened. Under my real name, Jimmy Brown, I commented to requesters to send emails and I may have gone a tad overboard. I did spend a while doing it yesterday and Youtube suspended my account. I appealed and they denied it in about an hour. Now, I want to make this clear, I have nobody to blame here but myself, I did get carried away, I just wanted to vent. I have a podcast about unsold TV pilots and all of the ones that are on Youtube are saved in my Watch Later. Now, all gone, about 60 of them, gone because I'm a moron. They are still on Youtube, sure but up until ten minutes ago, I couldn't even watch videos while signed out. I want to apologise to James for what Youtube is calling spamming.

The funny thing is too, I was going to stop doing it anyway, I had no time to do it today or tomorrow, lol.

[u/Khalbrae]

Pet Sematary can be streamed on Amazon Prime!

[u/ROBOT_B9]

Aw, no Car 54 reference?

[u/BattleCried]

This is good

[u/TheKazarka]

I love this movie so much, but the main actor is so shit

[u/judsonjason]

It’s weird to hear someone say Jud out loud so many times; I usually never hear my name!

[u/Esquilax21]

Havent seen this movie in YEARS