Nick Rutherford is Sharkboy | TigerBelly 180

[Music] [Music] rich wall and everybody rich wallet rich you'll never know if you don't get one it really is one of the greatest things in my pocket if I know it's there I feel saying it's the only thing in your pocket and really it I've lint and some coins okay and boogers I saved through the years oh and I like to go to what underneath a desk like a school does and I like to grab the stuff that's underneath it you go to Safeway you straight just go to schools for that I go to schools and I just grab the stuff that's in it but that's from my other pocket my one my main pocket though is what my Ridge wallet is and it has RFID production become slim front pocket pocket yeah it's got carbon fiber titanium aluminum on lifetime guarantee free shipping worldwide everyone knows that I that's like one of our favorite these are one of our favorite products pretty like it's just stacked pretty like you're you know like go be shut up go be calm and use promo code belly for 10% off your sleek front carry pull wallet be the future with Ridge wallet tell them about it good or rich while talk comedies the something new well if you help about it I'll tell you about it you see that guy sitting right there he's from the future okay that's not good four three two one papaya papaya how you doing are you good I'm good welcome to another episode of a tiger bear listen we were we have a guest today but he's off about 45 minutes late his name is Nick Rutherford a couple of days ago he's like oh I'm promoting a movie and I really need help because there's no publicity I bumped a couple of people to get him on and now we're sitting here waiting for him I love him you know he doesn't know we're starting without him and when we get here when he gets here we're gonna pretend that we haven't started yet okay okay everything's good but yeah there's repercussions okay first of all this dude Nick Rutherford has cheeks what does that mean he's got like really like you know like a like Beaver cheeks on his face I've never seen his ass and then also on top of that he's got pretty much hair true yes curly like Brady Bunch hair you know he's yeah and he's got Wild Eyes he used to date live with Jayde Kenna Preta for years they were gonna get married like eight years I know a while and then I think he broke her knee broke her heart but I don't want to get into that with him but this is business my opinions now before he's gonna be great by the way he's a good actor and he's also armed how he broke one of your best friends yeah he's gonna ask him but then he um he also was a writer at SNL for a year mm-hmm and then something happened I don't know what happened I'm gonna have to ask him about that Oh his casket I mean his welcome what happened was he had a group called good neighborhood sorry I'm I'm a big fan I'm just a really big fan of them sorry yeah I was gonna say good right so anyway he had a sketch group all good neighborhood and what happened was I think there was four dudes on the sketch group correct three there's three dudes in the sketch there's a fourth like camera guy yeah he's a director yeah but three dudes but how many got four hired for SNL three of them oh the director too yeah yeah yeah yeah so just the Nick got hired as a writer so you can't know what it was those three got hired first Nick audition didn't get it and then remember he was suicidal no I want to sit now when he comes here we can compare store compare story and then he and then what happened was uh then they hired him as a writer I guess they felt bad and then he got on it and then he disappeared but my point is is though that I don't know those other guys but I know Nick and I think that he is special and I think is very talented guy and that's why you know he was supposed to be here but also on top of it like I want to also say that Michaels Bisbing was here on time yep early Jordan Peele was here on time Eric Stonestreet was here on time is he here all right so you know what he's gonna park in the garage we gonna see [ __ ] George is that told me to show up late to show what how late though not that way not that tell Nick to get here exactly on time and not early Oh not bonding all right so uh here's another thing before it gets in here you know I know Nick you know he's a friend I've done some gigs with him he's a nice guy I don't know what he's like on podcasts but I think he's cute and I think that he is a funny I think he's legitimate so let's just try to be you know our resentment toward him being late let's not let that be a thing don't interfere I don't you want to talk about that I'm not gonna allude to the fact that he's late mm-hmm right and I'm just gonna pretend we haven't even started and I think you can help yourself oh I can help myself I'm helping myself now as we speak so you're just gonna carry on as if he's on time yeah and you're not gonna ever bring it up and say hey dude where were you no I'm gonna I'm gonna skirt around the fact oh you're he's never gonna we're never gonna know he'll never know watch this oh you want to see [ __ ] trickery mind trickery I think that wordplay how much do you put on I know we're play babe 20 bucks 20 bucks 20 bucks all right he's not gonna help myself come on yeah so he's gonna park in the garage I thought that traitor and we did at that Korean uh small oh yeah was kind of fun a lot people loved it he put it out already yeah we put it out we put the whole hour you did the whole hour out there people liked it they loved in what way they said that they liked that it gave us other stuff to talk about and like kind of the environment making fun of all the Koreans or in the puffy jackets they didn't know about like that whole culture yeah yeah yeah it's a culture what does cheeks gonna get here have you guys seen abducted in plain sight yet on Netflix oh god that was a crazy one also Nick was on a TV show I saw a billboard with him maybe a month ago of some sort of like science show on sci-fi or something oh it was just his face on a gigantic billboard I think a black eye maybe but I want to ask him about that but this guy's in cahoots with a lot of cool people and I'm just wondering to see where his head is that you know I want to know where his head is at also um you got to forgive him though people Ellie people in the rain don't know oh it is raining is it not yeah squall outside it's a song Milli Vanilli yeah there's the other one yeah just give me the beginning of it the first couple of words when you said blame it on the rain it escaped my head I was right about the state and then you sang the [ __ ] we did that whole joke about like yeah did they kill themselves believe annoy one of them or is that like a humor urban like somebody yes somebody I heard that one of the guys had jumped off a building and then while he was up on the building somebody yelled out are you gonna jump or gonna let somebody else jump for you that's a good one that's an old one yeah urban legends used to be a thing and you couldn't like you know cross-reference anything and you would just believe them wait yeah because urban legends come from some before Snopes now you can look at snow what is an urban legend offhand like that one they did one urban legend I'm sure I've told it on the podcast and that girl I'm gonna pretend I'm not even in the room what do I do Oh like casual like we haven't we haven't okay I guess I'll keep trying to fix this could be as you need to fix it is interference hi Nick you've got waters for you we got coffees all sorts of stuff there is you said turn everything on Bobby bone town I brought my zimas yeah I didn't like the way his approach was ooh Chris Hanson yeah that was the big guy come out of a door sexual prayer Chris hands what he was doing was like you know you know he was he needed to do what he was doing because he's stopping you know that's just the way he would enter was a little shocking to me cuz I don't know where I'm imagine you wanna get you're like your guy oh my god I got you know yes yonas off hand the creditors yeah yeah yeah but I like that he would swoop in with a clipboard and be like have a seat yeah yeah people work with them yeah which is like there's always like you are a star master 16 yeah when you said I want you to taste my [ __ ] like I don't know man I'm here just to hang out yeah yeah she needed a friend I like that sometimes they go yeah no I just wanted to be your friend because try to protect her from people like me you're a 52 year old man you want to be friends yeah yeah yeah and you say I was good Chris Hansen did and then I go yeah anyway no I have it this is how the podcast goes do it countdown we you don't say it I can't be a part of this you know you're not a part of anything you shouldn't say anything can I say three no you're on your game to do that all right all right so before we start we're not gonna add this stuff so what we set up so put that down man it's not your [ __ ] your you want one anything it's a rich wallet you know what those are I'll show you it seems like a mistake these are wallets that we all use and it's got um you put your credit cards here as era of era RFID protection and you put your money here you want one I mean yeah yeah get him one stack it now it was only these are expensive dude you got one for free dude thank you we response about them they're great don't open it now later yeah just turn everything on yeah let's turn everything on and until I say your name you don't introduce me or for no this is the rule okay I love you do thanks for coming hey man don't even touch with your [ __ ] skinny fingers did you lose weight you look anyway let's go to start okay I didn't really into code five four three two one oh my god all right put the net didn't happen we could do it again I don't want to do it again okay but that debt put me in a rage I just got rage I gotta put away from my Center just list are you planning yeah starter Valley go ahead 5 4 3 2 welcome to the revs in here what we do is it welcome to nervous a pataga belly I'm your captain Bob Bob Lee the Magnificent mm-hmm the translucent the forever one yes I'm a forever one we got [ __ ] white you got [ __ ] white ass here that's him that's new yeah yeah yeah [ __ ] white all right you're a [ __ ] remember that ok we got his cousins [ __ ] white jr. this one's my favorite one this one right here is better than this one new and improved right here Bryce you got fat flat what's that yes right we got my girlfriend kalila the princess evolved Lotus Wow we got me Bob Captain Bob now listen um we've had so many guests on the show we've had um maybe maybe a guest we've had on the show Modern Family's Eric Stonestreet we did it yeah was he on time think he was five minutes early yeah it was five minutes early correct yeah yeah we've had some african-americans all right the director get out yeah he was on time correct ten minutes early great [Music] now the biggest cash you've ever yeah because yeah yeah now on this next guy coming he's here already but um I did a college gig without you from where the college yeah yeah yeah I drove craze rented a car yeah yeah and that was a weird gig but we had fun we had a meal afterwards I pizza or something afterwards no that was a different yeah they wrote me a letter saying no they wrote a article do you read that article yeah where I was yeah they're like I wasn't good right they know basically they just were like furious furious about me your material because it was too crude to this to that you know college kids yeah yeah really yeah yeah I got that I remember there was a article read and I was really pumped about it um this next guy also was a writer on us and now he he was on a billboard a couple a month ago what was that billboard by the story was your face right it was some sci-fi that sci-fi show yeah dream Corp LLC dream Corp LIC what channel was it was that on Adult Swim Adult Swim yeah and you were that was a really good thing for you just in terms of looking at that I was like and the busiest street on Sunset your [ __ ] big fire vane on a billboard before I did feel weird I am now one time I for animal practice yeah I'm on a show now but they don't use me for the UM it's a funny one [ __ ] white huh the day I see you one of the [ __ ] Billboard is the day I die friend okay it's the day I die and I'm gonna say this right you're gonna buy a tiger belly billboard are you really there was a GoFundMe and started on behalf of your desire I really want to be on a billboard bad like but my own you know the way I want to dress we talk about the issues in the world the one that's at the forefront of my mind is getting you on a billable yeah thank you if we need to go fund me for anything right it's my press for about yet you have cheeks like a chipmunk right you have you know I said pretty bunch here mm-hmm you know you're a very funny young man and you called me the other day because um you're promoting something I'm glad you did the research you sent me you [ __ ] texted me I take your emails you Uniting get the email but you texted me a photo of a new movie that you're in yeah it looks great it's very good yeah and what is the movie called it's called the unicorn that's right the unicorn yeah right that's the the horse with the thing in the head I was just in your bathroom you have a drawing of a tattoo right I do I love them yeah I really love unicorns it's all about unicorns no but there's really no unicorn on the poster though I don't know how closely you looked at the poster yeah you may have missed it because it's neon pink and it everybody on the poster right yeah all I saw was six white heads of people actors okay four five no no I'm not being that's what I saw I noticed I am no Mexican oh that's what you are yeah that's right that's alright that's a you saw five white guys yeah yeah so then so this move when does it come out it came out this weekend it's done when did this go up tomorrow night okay tomorrow is perfect because now it's on it now it's on iTunes and Amazon oh it is yeah Tuesday so we could watch it immediately you can watch it right now right yeah the Unicorn what is it about it's about me and Lauren lapkus is my fiancee she's very very funny and we are kind of bored and boring people and we spend one night in Palm Springs we kind of find out that her parents who are very much in love have threesomes oh yeah and so we're like [ __ ] should we be doing that rock hard in the room right have you been in threesome I've never been in a threesome you've never know who raise your hand anyone the room that's been in threesome these asset price price you were in a threesome who's the person who's the second person Jorge clearly Jorge is the storage wait you guys ins and they are cousins yeah of course George has his cousin working on this yeah yeah so you are you were in a threesome with what were the two dudes and one girl I can see that look at the way he's good my threesome has been with two guys every time every time I did a fivesome with three guys and two girls uh-huh oh yeah it's funny it's not funny at all I could tell you that story and then I did a threesome with a guy named Michael Burton and another comedian a female comedian and I forgot her I know her name but I'm not gonna say it because it's a little you forgot it you forgot it but that was um because it's my ex-girlfriend you mean J I do mean Jane yeah yeah no no wasn't Jade what happened between you two oh god this is like minute too you know what that reminds me of it reminds me of Adam and Eve [Music] guys back in my day dude like if I wanted to get sexual things products what kind of sexual things would you I would get um I would get like plastic vagina vaginal yeah yeah lubes and stuff but I would have to go to like you know all the way into deep into San Diego territory to get it you know downtown it's not easy I don't have to do that I just go on adamandeve.com and I can grab all the little things that I want you know I mean like beads from my but not for closet for your but for my own body your own yeah beads for my butt like vibrated vibrations for your butt yes like vibration I like vibrations on my butt and I like things for the tip for your butt Bull Run button yeah um you guys could tell them about it guys mentioned Valentines offer a 50% off almost any item plus ten free gifts at Adam Eve calm side use the promo code belly at checkout annum and ease back to the show don't leave frizzled Nick kind of just say this in my podcast right I love you bro and that's let me say something right now there are people that want to be on this podcast like we have a list of so many [ __ ] people that want to do it people give me [ __ ] about all the time I bumped people for you to get on thank you I really what I'm saying to you right now I'm the way I do it I'm gonna ask you questions about things that you might know what talking if you don't know we can Nick you can cut it out no it's fine I don't want to hurt anybody's feelings right cuz she's done ours twice right twice and terribly or I think it I think it's the natural end we were not making each other happy right we were we were we had so many built-up resentments and we were just we were better off yeah but you guys still photography talk a little bit because we have this apartment in New York that we just rent but that we Airbnb so there's always the conversations are about like oh did you call the maid or should we let this guy book the apartment yeah because I honestly thought and that we were will just will win a brush upon it we're gonna move on to the next thing we can get into it but I don't I don't want to get into it I don't want to because she's you both are family and I don't want I don't even know I don't want to get into it right of that yeah yeah but we're all family and there's no size of being take take take in here we look would love everyone but um but I always thought that you two were gonna be forever well yeah we are terrible instinct I do yeah yeah yeah well you can't read a room in all eight years or seven why right yeah you guys got a house together who has the house it's my house right so she'd live somewhere else I don't care where she lives she lives somewhere else she's young people unhappy and I you know I mean I wish of the but obviously and wish her the best yeah I wish her the best he'll well you were a friend you see her all the time you're probably you see her more than I see it I do see her a lot I don't see you that off myth I haven't seen you since we've definitely since we broke up that's it is true right yeah that's weird I know yeah because I always you know okay yeah go ahead well because you always gave me great advice about her and the one thing was you said let her don't take away Wolverines claws do you remember this because I'm a very jealous human yeah and she's a very Magnum Magnum yes yeah George like Nana know we make up words here all the time and that's that put that down that's man I'm on a magnanimous person yeah and she commands a lot of attention and like I'm a very small and petty little worm yeah I was always like why is she talking to somebody else and not me and you were like don't take away Wolverines claws you told me this at that at that uh if that Italian restaurant after they call yeah yeah yeah I remember that I remember us just you and I were the only ones there sitting there after the photo yeah yeah we did do we set up a photo and I just remember just eating with you and that was a memorable I don't know why oh it meant a lot to me to know I'm being real no I am too yeah yeah because yeah was somewhere like yeah that or it's North Carolina was Jersey New York that's right New Jersey I got like a go-kart yeah and this is when you were were you on SNL then I was writing on this you were writing on SNL and then I remember meeting you there at the gig and we had that weird pizza but I don't know why that's different you know things I've done so many things but I just remember that moment distinctly here's another moment I remember when before you guys dated you and Jade and being in Vegas with Jade and her talking about you oh my god this guy Nick Rutherford and just work I just remembered that distinctly as well you know well what do you want is she gonna show up we're gonna move on for it Nikki okay it's fine I mean again I don't I never want to take advantage of a situation or take advantage of a human and so I just don't want anybody to be the butt of the joke or yeah and we're not doing that I just wanted a because we're all we all know each other and then cuz this is the kind of podcaster that I wrong we talk about personal things we you know we you know and if you don't like what we're saying you can always cut it out for you I don't think we've I don't know no I don't we need to do that really right now I won't no I don't think so either I like you know I am not in love with Jade I will always be I will always love Jade I think she's a great human and she's insanely funny and talented yeah and we and I know it sounds very political but we we just when we weren't working out right yes that's what we now we touched upon it now we can [ __ ] move on from it and we've got it we'll never talk about it again okay friend okay yeah here's another thing I wanted to talk about before we go into other things okay is I just want to know how long you were at SNL and then why did you leave and all that kind of stuff I was at a snow for a year yeah one year one full season 40 episodes yeah and I left because they fired me and they didn't want me around there no it's not a comfortable yeah I like my time there and we weren't making each other happy anymore yeah because I remember you telling stories though yeah how cool it was like you were like oh my god Jim Carrey was here and we you know or in you'd all these people that you were like that would come into the office and you guys would write things and I just remember feeling your excitement about it and then and then in my head you know and I'll just be honest with you you know I thought that you were being treated poorly there I think that number one right if you're gonna hire good neighbor hire everybody okay yeah number two you're the one you were didn't you start good neighbor we all start a good neighbor ID you started it you start I started good name and also on top of it I'm gonna say that you know I honestly view you as a legitimate comedy entity I think that you're very talented and funny and you have this um you're very nice guy but there's an executor yeah there we go there's an edge about you that yeah you know and but let me say this too since you've got left you've been killing it thank you yeah I agree with you I don't I'm killing it and no I don't think it's like it wasn't a match it didn't work I and it was [ __ ] I mean we talked you were and I don't know if you how much you know this but like at the time like jade was opening for you and so I would like maybe host or something or get a guest by Y so there was a lot of like Long Beach sets where I would come with you and I was in the middle of it like probably before I got hired and my big comedy team had been swept underneath me and like taken away and I got left out and I was [ __ ] wrecked by it I was really wrecked yeah and I got really really smart and nice to me do you remember any of this I wonder what's it that's why I'm saying it right now because I remember you being to me even hearing about it it devastated me because I liked you so much and I'm like this you know I just doesn't make any really sent and then own to see you in that state must have been so [ __ ] weird and difficult I can't even do it but you know what that's what at the end of the day dude it's like Jeff Richards not that I'm clumping you with Jeff Richards but there's a guy named Jeff Richards he was on MADtv for episodes he's a good friend of mine he got let go they needed SNL for a couple years he got let go and then he spent 10 years getting over trying to get back into you know getting reps and trying to get back into the the business because he was just so devastated about it but now I see Jeff on the road now he's getting booked he's getting some she's getting some social media following and he didn't quit like he he's persevering and he had some really fucked-up difficult times you know not that you went through that but what I when I see you you know like on the bill when I was driving down the street I'm imagine and looking at you after all the things I know that you went through it makes me feel I'm being real now what the cry almost I know I know it makes me feel like oh I'm not gonna quit you know you can't quit quitting is that's when you lose yes yeah yeah they've been a lot of people have been like man you just got kicked in the dick over and over again it's like yeah but this is what I do I just get kicked in the dick and yeah yeah I'm really good at getting kicking the dick yeah but you're also good about putting your hands on your take after you got kicked standing back up getting right into the camera the camera go oh oh mama but um yeah I think I do I just think I'm just really happy for you dude hey is that when you called me about promoting this movie oh they reach out to for maybe maybe two years yeah you can put that cap anywhere he's on the ground now it's fine and then that was very nervous I was like I know you have a reach and you guys like people and I want people to see this film so that was really where it came out well you know we and I would like to reach out to you in other ways like let's go get pizza and a weird New Jersey here's what how you can help me okay here's how you can help me one day I know you tell me this all the time right is is that and you know and you know Pappas had a resurgence the last couple of years which I don't think is warranted but going did that bird but then it didn't I laughed just as a defense mechanism huh and then it's got a little bit of rage but did it subsided and I'm happy again that works in a day but um you know I'm on a show now you know I got this I'm getting back into things is great it's what I never heard of this show what's the sitcom it's got splitting up together it's an ABC show meet jenna fischer jenna fischer Pam yeah Wow who-who yelled at me the other day by the way really well don't say this story I want to because we're made we made up it was it was warranted with Wharton and I [ __ ] up I I apologize glad she did this because this is everything I've wanted to say to you for the past six yeah set the stove this is what happened um so there's this lady that's on our guest stars her name is Monica Barbara oh and she's on the new Top Gun movie but she she plays the love interest of Oliver in the show that I'm on right and because of her tops done schedule we had to shoot all her coverage weeks ago on a weekend right and then we did all our coverage this week so we monitor act into like an ad yeah 80 basically right and also in the coverage that we have I don't say anything it's just reaction of her talking or her singing a song whatever right and I'm just going you know whatever you know that that's not what I did but you know but in what tapes I think you burn the land and I have this habit and it's not a good habit and and it's funny because I know that people have been annoyed by it my behavior in previous you know jobs that I've done what's the habit is I just if it's not my coverage I will say the lines and I have my lines memorized and I'll give you everything but I also tweet and and look at Instagram I play games yeah it's anybody wonder it's rolling it's just like but in this particular time I know that there was a three shot on Jannah bunch of people right and I was off to the side I know that I wasn't on screen but you know I mean I still had to be there yeah yeah sure so I just started playing this game called empires and puzzles right we all know a shout out yeah nothing I mean playing it and it just goes Bobby she's not wrong I know she's not and I was so embarrassed then that was like the last take so I got up and I just walked away and I went to craft service I just start pacing like what the [ __ ] why did you do what you're doing you know I like her she's so nice and I love working with her and she did that and then and then she got on a bus and she went away someone I couldn't even say got her buzz you know the van to go back okay I'm picturing holding like old-school Greyhound and but then the next day I walked up to her and I'm so deep and she was like oh yeah I'd she's like just you know just don't do that okay yeah well I'm not gonna hide she's like I love you and though you know everything was good yeah but that she needed to do somebody well it's very important it's like very very boring to be on a set it's so yeah so you got to get into questions and kingdoms and parts of puzzles puzzles um another thing that they do and I'm not complaining but this is what you're gonna want to cut out by the way no I'm not gonna cut no I talk about this all day I love the show and I love being on it and they know that I do and everyone loves me and everything's great and I show up on time and I know my lines a little okay okay is that the other day maybe a month ago there was a scene late night we're shooting at night and my wife on the shows her name is Lindsay Price and we're sitting there for our going don't know why we're here right and she's like yeah but I think we just they haven't told us that we're done mm-hmm and then some guy goes some guy that you think is craft service or what he goes hey what're you guys doing here that your core cuz we have a Tesla in the show that and it's gone from the driveway which means your guys are not yeah why are we even there at this house so I went up to the director and I go just three hours and he looks no what are you doing here late yeah for like hours he's like not after where you pull the Jenner yesterday no but that was wood before so they just little things like that you know man this should happen this should happened all the time on dream Corp to like you know the Hollywood thing hurry up and wait yeah you're you're always on call and then you basically spend most of your time sitting down being nervous about [ __ ] something up yeah right yeah that's yeah yeah the whole game that's the whole game yeah well what I did that you know that movie that I did with the card at whether or not the Kardashians but the Joe ants John Haskins that the Australian boys oh yeah I did a YouTube movie right and I got there at 4:00 p.m. 9:00 a.m. the next day I still hadn't shot like that full day a full day went by they didn't tell you like and that not yet at 9:00 a.m. I kind of I said slept a wander I was lie down and one draw you know how you would sleep for a lot that you go where am I what day is it and I go to the lady I go I saw I fell asleep like six hours but I got here yesterday at 5:00 yeah yeah and she goes oh you're not we're not shooting you now you know what told you she moved on to the thing you know they're gonna get your coverage you know whatever and I'm like what the [ __ ] that's what that's YouTube movies though I didn't catch that one yeah yeah I'm waiting for my red account to what don't be mean about it because it [ __ ] [ __ ] if you heard of that rigging company Oh George is holding up a sign I think we have an ad America's Got Talent champions yeah guys blue apron it's so good neighbors but they need to know about that yeah I want I wanted to know in the neighborhood about blue guys you guys you know I the reason why I saying it like that is because I'm so emotional about it yeah and I feel it from the gut oh my god you know um let me see let me see something to you right now dude it's like I don't know how to make food yeah I don't know how to cook it I'd never went to chef school pollen or culinary or none of that right but dude when I get blue apron packages I feel like Chef Boyardee or someone like that famous or better like I feel like no I don't feel like her to stone or I feel like okay yeah so guys they have dishes like spicy soy glazed chicken thighs get out of here I will but it's my house oh so stay here pork chorizo burgers and roasted potatoes Wow am I saying it clearly enough for you taste it it's garlic capers chicken yeah like I care yeah I love it that's why yeah I say like that they have a variety of things that um anyone can make it really is fresh great ingredients tell them about that guys check out this week's menu and gets $60 off a blue apron coms clash belly that's blue apron dot-com slash belly blue apron a better way took [Music] and back to the show but it's crazy that you're in a film where you're in a show with Jenna Fischer with Pam because the one of the EPS of dream Corp is Jim from the office John Krasinski really yeah oh that's weird and he's awesome yeah he's great yeah yeah I read I love that movie quite place oh crap he drew he wrote it and he started that movie was immediately [ __ ] amazing yeah it's really really good did you see hereditary yes stop everyone stop everyone stop you two would you like it I don't want to be honest with me I don't know if I know what happened during it but would you like the movie when you walked out um I was very shook me too yeah I didn't like very uncomfortable yeah me too yeah I just saw very similar vibes I think Enter the Void you seen that oh don't watch it why it's this movie by this guy gasp his first time is Gasper by the way Gasper no I think he did the other movie yeah he did so much yeah some of his stuff is like normal palpable stuff and another stuff is like this movies like about a guy who dies while tripping on DMT oh I've been through like Tokyo what basically like watching his existence and like he's like a spirit rolling through so he sees his sister and the [ __ ] she's going through and like it's [ __ ] gnarly it doesn't ever let up and you're like what else what else can we have and then it's like oh here's a live abortion that we're going to show you why swear together it's not even that notice is funny they yeah yeah and then the end usually live abortion a funny part but yeah but not this one not the way they should yeah yeah and then yeah that should be there's no there was no color guy and then it ends with you you're in a vagina yes he is coming at you so you're in like oh there's literally a penis head coming at you and then it's like please don't come on me and then it comes on you know Daisy she'll come yeah oh you're bathed in it by the end it's your eye size of viewer you're bathed in calm uh-huh I saw it at Ford Ford II Wow so you wouldn't recommend that it's really it's a real rough there's also two hours in 30 minutes like way too long it's very there's no they don't let you up and that was the same with hereditary just like please let me out of this movie and then like her [ __ ] own neck is so gnarly gnarly yeah I found that movie to be and people say it's a piece of [ __ ] and I got people all the time I walked out or I hated that movie or I'm like I saw three times I liked it yeah yeah Marlon Wayans is naked ass on the bed that's the only thing I have to say in that movie and I've told them this before good ass like in terms of I'm being real I mean this is a roundabout way to get to Marlon Wayans ass just open up with hereditary yeah good I knew she was gonna bring up yeah Marlon Wayans ask what a great ass good writing yeah I don't remember you see getting is he also doing something that didn't wanna do because of drugs no I don't remember him being I think the our yeah yeah yeah she's great right in that yeah when she's like it's like it's almost like a like a security camera and she's like in the inner kitchen like movie share obsessing over that one show yeah the show starts talking her yeah baby on the ceiling call yeah if yours ever incitement hey guys if you haven't seen it that's it's a must watch one at least one time its Arnoff ski ride that he did Black Swan oh I like you did the wrestler you you the wrestler the wrestler would make it work I think you did that as well you didn't like mother oh you don't like my mother I do like mother why cuz I like that it was like this poem the whole thing was this like weird palma by yes allegory about women and like how people like you use them up and its really really I totally well it's more like art and I liked it I mean I also thought that shots were just crazy like going from the war to the thing and then then it goes too much like wave yeah I saw one if you haven't seen it Nicolas Cage's Mandy Mandy Oh Mandy's great dude did you see Mandy flat-faced ayat oh my god faith left that Mandy dude have you seen Mandy what [ __ ] yeah he's understood oh yeah I showed you Fowler I told you much in the theaters he was on theatres for a minute you started the movie there no I want to oh yeah dude there's let me see something about Mandy dude number one from big the beginning of the movie you're like okay this is an complete LSD trip just in terms of choice the color there was also somebody a person those are somebody that kind of what he wanted to make you could tell that up front so don't you watch a movie you go oh they don't really know what they they don't really want to do well it shifts you know yeah but this guy right from beginning you're like okay I'm in good hands because this guy this is he knows what he wants to do yeah he wants to make a statement right and it's a revenge movie which I love which I love revenge movie you gotta hate box I haven't don't we have a hate Fox I know you tell me to have a hate box I told you that yeah what did I say this was outside of like The Improv all remember this is like this is when we really started to become friends I think yes before the New York trip but we were outside of the like Long Beach improv or something yeah maybe in that like alleyways mode there isn't one but let's just suppose the resident we're at their lawn don't be no I think it's Laugh Factory Oh am I even Laugh Factory with the with the thing and I was in the middle of like figuring out what that meant to not be brought on with all my buddies onto this cool show and you were just like just pack them all into a hate box close it up pack them deep inside your heart yeah in retrospect terrible advice by you rely a cancer I've been yeah and I was like it was just right you were very you know you're very nice and cool and you got it and you were like do we all get [ __ ] over and it's okay like that Phase II where you were saying it was like but know that what if you know I think I'm saying it wrong it's not a hate box what it is is it's a hate engine oh it feels you right you put the the resentments and the hate and all that you don't lash out on people you put it in this engine and it motivates you it's like he's going right it's like coal you're there you're there sir that's exactly Wow that's another good movie and that's a good [ __ ] reference yeah yeah I'm a train right and you're basically and you can't stop if you stop you die so you put that's another good one do we should write a book you and I I'm down sharks they can't ever stop moving or else they'll die yeah you got to keep going and every once in while you kind of got you kind of go why am i doing all this giving this podcast I can sit around sometimes I wonder that too and you go oh no I got to keep it going mm-hmm this is all a part of well it is very much if you're like I feel like I'm a shark like not in the sense of I'm like eating things but like if I don't stop working like my whole life my whole identity is based on work from a very young age like I just work and so if I don't work who am i anyway that sounds like a good time for a commercial break rich Wallace just on the site he's your brother okay yeah he's okay he's okay is that not no no he's okay actually like if we get on time I'm gonna go watch him do an improv show in LA oh so he is easy sober he's sober well he's clean he's not sober but as long as he's doing better yeah that's the most important thing yeah and that's another thing that I identified to it you with you with because I would remember when my brother Steve oh yeah how's he's doing great gets his own chantal's show that he produces it's called this TBB show well he always was an amazing artist yeah yeah he I think he had a good outlet he's a good outlet but he's a funny guy he does so he's so sweet he's a sweet you know you know Steve yeah yeah yeah yeah and he he's got ten year sober now and no he I'm so proud and happy to be his brother because you know he could have ended up dead Yeah right if you just like you have it you could have ended up dead at some point now or we don't all think about it I'm on my way no do you look you look right like you you're not used to be a little chunkier but you have a Yogi's body yeah you're fin I do that a lot of you look really good right now and a happy almost I'm very happy I'm dating somebody new hence the yogi body is she hippy hippy or what no she's not hippy well that's not true she is reading osho she's she's not she's like a linguist she's like in like the academia she's like oh wow yeah how do you meet someone like that at a party just a part not even interesting story I was trying to make up a funny version of the reality but it was just like got a party together and then recently we traveled together and we found this book from Osho yeah and she was like I want to read this and now she's way into it she's very spiritual but she's also very intelligent like she's a smart fella but oh she had a lot of great messages I think he was yeah I think Sheila I think she was like you know she was trying to make it a thing you know was becoming a thing I also think he's maybe creepy so I like I take a little bit of what he says with the grain of salt yeah he was a really brilliant man with still Messiah Complex yeah yeah yeah he loved being a dork when you see him dancing with like yeah Rolls Royce yeah yeah oh yeah yeah this guy is not Jesus yeah and nobody will be can we take a quick prayer do you think I have the ability to be that type of figure yeah I would say you're on the way I would say do you think I have the ability you literally just have to say anything and own it like you just say something insane anything else's because I'll be honest with you I'm full of [ __ ] so was he I know but like little things that I tell young comics and people I have young comics coming to me all the time Oh like you just did oh yeah back in you know 2003 you said this to me Ari Shaffir used to write the things they used to say to him and put it in like a poster as advice and then put it on the is like vision board and I do that right because I want to pretend that I'm this guy that's been doing comedy for so long that I have knowledge but at the end of the day I don't know nothing but I think that it's really like bog wants a perfect example of knowing how to relay a message he was very like prophetic in that way where it's like he commanded your attention even though what he was saying like was probably equally as profound as the next guy yeah but he had an essence about him he had like he you know he just captured your ears in that way and I think you do too yeah that's truly it and if you have a strong message that's all people want the other day you convinced us that the reason Asians put their hands behind their back was because they made special bells that Hyden I believe he believes he a twenty-minute like history lesson we're like yeah because they were like how why do old Asian man walk like this sometimes every once in a while ago this is time for a lie see if I can do it yeah and I said there's like that back in the day a thousand years ago all Asian men in Korea especially especially belts right and they would hide their knives in these two slots behind their back right I don't believe in and people would walk like that and and if anyone was walking like that you knew not to [ __ ] with them because he had these knives in the back of back of them and over years of doing it now just people just do that so all the younger Koreans are now genetically predisposed to walking in that way because of the knives yeah and he sat there in Arles like wow I didn't know that she's trying she's trying to add information like oh that's why I squat easy for me to school so I can get to the nice quick yeah that's literally what even Eckhart Tolle babe I know we love him yeah but the guy's full of [ __ ] yes Chopra is a [ __ ] yeah yeah well I'll tell you why I know Deepak Chopra is a full of [ __ ] and it broke my heart because you know he you know he had his own Center and La Jolla where I lived and I ran into a couple of waiters you know just front when I was living down there and they said oh yeah he comes to a restaurant and he doesn't tip to me though yeah to me is if any somebody doesn't tip well there's some part of the discipline there's a selfishness or something about them that's not they're not generous or you know they don't get there so disconnected to the working class they don't know what it's like do waiting tables I think is that one of the hardest [ __ ] job everybody should have to wait to yes yeah yeah because have you used to do a row yeah for you yeah right and I kind of give or miss it you mean it'd be slammed yeah being slammed back and brave he's like table 14 I didn't ever get the Glock and blah blah yeah I love that [ __ ] like you were like oh man like spending all this plate I love that Wow well I mean like it's I know now looking back it was a it's rose-colored glasses like that was fun to have like a community and like take your 30 minute break and like have two margaritas at the bar and then yeah like I'm very much happier now and but like there's something about it that's very romanticized struggle I really room yeah yeah me too yeah yeah when you're when you have like 12 sections and table number eight goes can we get some ketchup and then you're getting you're out to get ketchup then but the two other table stop you can I get eyes we don't have a spoon right now you have three things right but then now food is coming for a different table and you could see it on the thing right and now you're running around like a [ __ ] madman and it doesn't let up it never lets it never lets up it was like a like what we do now is hard to define success or not right that it's successful if you get them they're orange chicken or whatever it was you're serving them that's what's up what's up hi just a random Philip I'm just saying though why orange chicken oh okay yeah yeah so you bring them General Tso's chicken I just and then you're laughing a little too hard on that and I like it I like what you're doing this is that the thing is is that this is this that I served American food go ahead where do you work Brockton Villa it was I in La Jolla was at a Cove this is the high like San Diego right not in Beijing not that long I did it okay now you're right can we cut that way yeah I served at PJ's pizzeria oh wow macaroni grill oh and then um what's that big place in the Beverly Center it's like no it's like they do you remember what it was called Grand Lux Cafe work their fancy how long fancy tour like a full year and a half okay I go to the Grand Lux in Vegas it's a nice you take that yeah Saturday than Cheesecake Factory do you want to know why grandmas cafe exist because Cheesecake Factory was so popular but Cheesecake Factory had this contract with whatever was like Caesars I think that they could not open a second seat Cheesecake Factory within ten miles but it was so popular so they made a new restaurant concept called grandma's cafe the same exact thing the menus huge the servings are [ __ ] here yeah yeah and they were like we're just gonna do something slightly different and then be while they successful - and grandma's cafe has never closed in it's a 24-hour restaurant they have fryers that have never ever been not frying food since the day they of sharks yeah sharks yeah a guy went to high school with Kevin shul one day he bragged to me because he does like he works at a place where they they do walls that they they draw on walls and art and he goes you know we did the lines on the Grand Lux Cafe I really like a little lines like the drawing and I go I don't give a [ __ ] it's very fine work it is would you [ __ ] brag about that you write like articles about the inside of Cheesecake factories how they do yeah I think that's a big missing out then it's like a mishmash of everything in like the Renaissance period yes of mash up like they forget like hand blown glass from Italy yeah they're like really and also when you work there like you're getting trained by a corporate trainer who's like this is the best restaurant in the world yeah you're in but it's so funny that you wouldn't because I don't see you because I feel like there is an edge to you like I mean nothing you're bitter but there is an edge to you that I just can't see you waiting tables really did you ever snap no I'm Harrison ahead I waited tables I delivered pizzas like I was service industry guy Wow yeah that was way into it but there was one so I had to work at Grandma's cafe at the Cheesecake Factory in Beverly Center on Neer's day and I didn't know why do I see do not want to but it's a very like it's like high-end casual it's very weird so you have to press your shirt so I woke up I crashed on my buddy's house I woke up at like 9:00 in the morning to go do the breakfast shift and I was [ __ ] hungover and my buddies were like didn't after work so just like ripping bongs and like watching football and I pressed a shirt I shaved and to be sure I never shaved yeah I was like cleanly shaved i press this shirt like I brought starch spray like I was totally doing work right yeah and then they're like we'll hit a bowl and I like I smoke a little bit of we knows I haha and they were just like have fun at work and I stepped outside and rained the night before and I came up with this plan which is if I just jump into mud like I'm fully prepared if I fall into mud and show up to work covered in mud they're gonna send me home I say I'm sick thinking about you're hungover coming to work or you're fired Wow I show up like I'm here my shirt is pressed I'm covered in [ __ ] mud what do you want to do they're gonna have to be like oh my god were so sorry go home yeah so I went outside the house and just dove into mud yeah yeah it was very funny it was like this is perfect your friends yeah yeah we were like talking about the bright angle to go in and then I'm just like driving to work covered in mud like just laughs and like I'm the smartest guy in the world and I show up in my the manager goes holy [ __ ] what happened he what's going on you're covered in mud I said yeah I was parking over there and I was running kind of running a little late and I was running I tripped on this little fence and I fell into mud and he goes there's no yards around here oh is this not there's not like where did you fall into mud it's like the middle of lost there's no yeah it's all concrete Oh freeze and I don't know what to say and he goes I'm kidding man that sucks and he passed me on the back you know just give you a bus or uniform you can work in that oh no you know to me that doesn't even sound like it would [ __ ] work it sounds like it totally work how can you say you can't imagine huh if you were limped in right dirty clothing it's like oh we'll find something for ya yeah okay we're in a mall right code hmm we're in a mall there's a through yeah I know okay well I was um I was 38 at the time here's another what does it say is that there is nothing more satisfying than working in a restaurant doing a lamb shift right and then afterwards no matter how much are making tip wise when you leave like Asia smoke cigarettes and after my shift I used to go to the cove after a long [ __ ] up day and just sit there and smoke a cigarette and just thank God it's over you know so I worked my ass off yeah to make this hundred dollars right in my pocket but that just like I don't know it's like why you huge and how satisfying I don't feel like that in show biz I know I try talking about this one I really like romanticize struggle and like you have something in your hand at the end of the day yeah and you go to the bar and you're like hey here's your tip out thirty bucks have a go in like you feel like you're a kingpin yeah everybody hates their job nobody wants to be there and like well [ __ ] on the customers and like you know you you're doing it the best job you can nobody's like spitting in food every are things like you spin food but never [ __ ] ever have never have it that's not sure he like ground cockroaches and put no no I oh yeah we had a [ __ ] roaches in the expressive renderer and certainly yes or the beans and the cockroaches would like you know and the you isn't put the hot steam into the talking about snowpiercer yeah that was yeah that's again I'm sorry it's a perfect protein yeah but there isn't and here's another reason why butter coffee yeah well why it felt good is because you know I'm not lazy you know when you do it no no no when I gave a Broadway table and I used to be slammed and I will sit there on the cove and smoke a cigarette in my head is like you you're you you manned up you showed up you worked hard you clocked and clocked out and you made this money that you earned and there is a sense that's all I'm saying [ __ ] yet now I'm so lazy you know and you're on set playing video games yeah yeah I just you know I like be on a game like the game I'm playing and it'll a special offer you get three knives and like you know a thing for $50.00 like oh yeah [ __ ] it yeah I buy it you know then Pam has to pull you aside to be like come on man alright you only waiting tables yeah I know but you know what there is a Ewan are similar that way did I miss it a little bit I do miss I like the camaraderie that comes with it I like them we're all in the [ __ ] I got to cover your shift cuz you're gonna cover my shift like I like that community I like a community yeah but what is it like now it's none of that right now you show up put makeup on your face I'm not that I'm no Bobby Lee I'm not that big like I still have to like work and like you know tell yourself I mean there are certainly are times with you okay when you're standing up you're right you're right in many ways I've been I've been blessed okay but I've had some hardships myself I know we both have okay I don't know what just stood there stood up tonight let's say that but you know I've had some hardship and you know I'm not gonna quit I know but none of this room is gonna quit well you're not gonna quit because you used to serve tables and you'd be in the [ __ ] and you had three tables I just got sat they sat you three tables on tall like bar tops and you're like why the [ __ ] would you save me I just came off a break and you still made it work this is what we do yeah we make it work I even been thinking about just just I just have this thought that you and I one day we should collect some of our money from this podcast let's open up a restaurant let me slam and be slammed and just feel like see if we could make it happen I've always wanted to open a restaurant yeah I like a Filipino breakfast restaurant in the Bay Area you always have like the Pepsi logo and all of that that you don't have it here yeah no it's not let's get Brad it's dream of doing that and so I'm actually not kidding I'm down but just don't throw all the work on me I feel like I did yeah but I want to make he's a face on the face of I'm not gonna be like tray hose tacos aggressive Donuts you know I mean how many businesses I [ __ ] I have Danny Trejo no but I see his top I've never been to any of them everywhere are they good people go there I know the tacos all right yeah but I love breakfast burritos as you know Papi's burritos and there is a place that I go sometimes you know I'll get rapped early Warner Brothers Toluca Lake restaurant you know I'll drive deep into Burbank and there's a place called the country cottage and it it's not a cottage and there's nothing country about it it's a [ __ ] hole in the wall nice it's a little hole in the wall it's this asian man with tattoos on his fingers right and then twelve Mexican dudes that are like mid-20s and they're just making breakfast burritos it seems like too many cuts right no but they all elves you can tell that they're yeah I'm being real they're all have this like a magical like a routine where they're just making because everyone wants to eat there right I'm telling you right now my mouth is watering all right right now I want to go tomorrow more have you ever had tacos via Corona yes I keep telling him and he will not go because they close at 2:00 p.m. which is yeah yeah they shut down they shut down when they run out of tortillas I met him the first day you're gonna say [ __ ] best wait wait the matriarch of the company they just died yeah they're open but there's new they're mourning but let me ask you about tacos cake Oklahoma yep yeah Corona Atwater yeah yeah Corona you're talking they have breakfast burrito sir yeah that's all they do and it's great yes they're like three dollars down they're that good what's in it potatoes nice egg and then after that it's up to you nopales bacon steak what is it nopales cactus I don't didn't catch us it's so good really good Trey good yeah but you know she's been saying that place for years I've never gone I think I wanna date we have to be really close tomorrow you woke up today at 5:00 p.m. but here's the thing here's the thing though a so playing destiny no wait did you play this we used to play and i remember Jade and I used to just cry together we plant wisely played way more than you did yeah I don't have any gear you know gear right right I jump on my little like speeder and I know how to play and you're gonna say yeah we're going to they're the lord of the find and then you guys would just kill everybody I would die multiple but that was follow misapplying yes but yeah you don't play anymore now Red Dead or nothing I'm into smash again I'm gonna smash bros this is why I got excited when I saw this did you don't have smash brothers do you I don't have it but I'm gonna tell you something about this device they're call what they call switches and I've been playing stardew valley I don't even know what that is it's a simulation gasps she hates it riot stardew valley yeah it's a farming game and you have the farm oh it really farmville it's not it looks a little bit like um Animal Crossing a little bit but it's not just a farming game all right there's mines to be explored are you can go below this creatures to fight you have a wife happy you have a wife right next to you right now my beautiful girlfriend yeah yeah girl do you take care of her you know how many times do you know how he's gonna stay oh well he takes care of penny and Hailey his wives on there yeah well I married the blonde one Haley she's her she's the most ungrateful wife I've ever what is she's a librarian the penny helps the kid she babysits kids in the library sure and she's got but but we know we know penny yes but Haley you know what she does what her favorite item everyone has a favorite item right yeah her fader I am his pink cake all right Peter cake pink cake Oh play a pancake with a pink no it's a cake but that's pink a pink cake are we talking about the same thing right now no not [ __ ] right so what Haley does to find her every day is she just sits there by a tree right she doesn't do anything and so I you know I married her and she says is the first time you've lit up this whole things in it that's like ridiculous she goes yeah my sister tried to feed me um parsnip soup and you know I don't like health food Haley yeah did she like breakfast burritos you should take this vehicle yeah you ever good at dune next to there - I like dune I like down [ __ ] you man these are right it's okay pretty good what do you get meat I get there the rap that you always get yeah yeah great before Jose one there bread there whatever that like they're there pita whatever that is so good so Nikki when I want to city oral I forgot to say this is that um I feel like that's the lamb yeah I feel like um you're gonna grow I think gonna produce shows and I'm still letting you know I like to work with you that's not gonna happen man anyway thanks for having me I don't know if he knows your emails yeah yeah Billy at Billy calm it's gonna let you know that Ferguson was supposed to Craig Ferguson it was bit tonight but we haven't tomorrow we pumped are you bumped in yeah that's great okay I'm glad he's still doing comedy now at the end of our podcast we do a thing called unhelpful advice it's a email people ask questions and we give them advice it doesn't have to be helpful it can be whatever you want I'm yeah so go ahead Gilbert on helpful advice with Nick Rutherford second city this is from boys promoting that's quality [ __ ] this is from a female listener we'll call her a chibi I have a co-worker who I became extremely close friends with throughout that time I made myself emotionally available for her in times of hardship in her life and really made an effort to be as good of a friend as her as I could what a traumatic event came up in my life she was nowhere to be found I didn't know that I felt unwanted as a friend and she expressed that she didn't have the emotional capacity to be there for me in the same way it just felt unfair and she completely withdrew from the friendship after that and basically replaced our friendship with another co-worker it's hard because I constantly have to see we're at work and we don't say anything to each other anymore as the [ __ ] King as the slept King and the dawn what should I do love you guys HB that seems like a tldr for me was a tiara so she had a friendship that was burgeoning and then it didn't didn't work out frame was not there to help it wasn't there was no reciprocity yeah it was betrayal that's what I saw mm-hmm and at the end of every betrayal there needs to be victory so yes so well you have to win I don't know what the dynamics of your work is I don't know where she works but at the end of the day you have to come up and you have to show this woman that you know that it's her loss okay yeah I agree with you right I really thing on in the sense of moving on that's not what I'm saying what's John why my my my girlfriend is very much smarter than me in a lot of ways and one of the things she's like I like I don't know about you I imagine we're very similar and so when somebody like you're trying to be friends with somebody and they don't you're making a lot of weird I try to listen to what you're saying when somebody like for me when somebody I'm like trying to become friends it's really hard to talk when somebody has any pushback of being my friend cuz I'm like I have no everything to offer and nothing like I'm just yeah and if there's any pushback it makes me want to be their friend more yeah yeah and my girlfriend has said like the best thing you can do is wildly ignore them and then they will come around or whatever they're whatever so H be your friend or your ex friend is dealing with their own insecurities has nothing to do with you and it makes you want to win you want a victory so you're gonna keep on pushing after that friendship you're gonna keep on chasing that friendship best thing you can do move on entirely [ __ ] cold her like cold case ER immediately move on and she'll come around L is the right one yeah yeah that's exactly what it is - yeah you know kind of them yeah you have to it's crazy and I'm not that Johnny Sanchez was my guy Johnny Sanchez back in the 90s there was a comic and he was the Dane Cook of The Comedy Store he was on fire did he wasn't like the Dane Cook of like the Laugh Factory and he was on fire and everyone used to all the young guys dorm I used to follow him around you know want to be his friend I would call him he would never call me back I pray to God right that he would be my best friend I remember going on my hands and knees please God I love this guy this guy's the coolest and then I just one day just said [ __ ] this [ __ ] I mean he's a nice guy he's very funny guy and then I just went the opposite direction I started my own thing and then you know years later I helped him get on MADtv and this and that but at the end of the day yeah now I don't chase I don't even think about him I see Johnny and I hug them I love them but I just it's like you know I just I completely moved on from it and again ow we're friends I love them but I don't have that anymore with that guy just you got to do that yeah because I think it's really unattractive when someone appears needy yeah of your time you know your affection or whatever it's just yeah it seems exhausting so again I you stand for any decision an announcement and this is just came - hey it just occurred to me it just occurred to me and I want to say this into them the camera are you standing I don't know why that may be so any I know I saw he's so [ __ ] angry just now but you were to jump the [ __ ] yeah I did that's growth on my part right yeah victorious all right aureus are they gonna pretend that didn't happen okay [ __ ] anyway last night I was at the Comedy Store and this boy came up to me earlier I got 20 white guy he goes tiger Bailey hey I'm here for you I go okay and he goes I love you okay he goes okay he goes let's be together to hang out good night oh yeah is it you don't know you know me I don't know he does I'm Ariana Grande that's what he said what ariana grande right and then go Nick and I was there with Ali Wong and a bunch of people and I just kind of walked away from him and he started following me around the Comedy Store oh and then he came into his notebook for real - I came in from Minnesota and I know I'm here for you I came here for you oh man right and so I could get the [ __ ] and I knew that Fahim Anwar was gonna go we're gonna have dinner afterwards and I didn't want to hang out in the club because he was there so I was in my car deep into the parking lot I'm just sitting I was playing my stardew valley hires and I hear Haley Haley he's [ __ ] at my car now in the bikini it's raining and he's looking at me through the [ __ ] there Oh Mike let's hang out what right and I go I don't know yeah what and he goes where's Joe Rogan and I go he's gonna be here some time this week he goes okay and he just walks away y-yeah so now I'm telling people you listen listen guys all right it's not for Ariana no it's a battery that is is that you know I know that underslept King I know I'm the your leader and I know that I love you and you love me and we're there's a connection that will be never with the bond it could never be broken but don't be crazy - all right don't kill me you don't want to punch your [ __ ] holes in my body I might bleed out so if you're crazy relax we're good okay but the comedy shows not a place where you can come in at cray-cray is it still a word yeah the kids are using it's hot I can't imagine crazy people come into the comedy story just hanging out it really was the first time where I went oh my god this guy might kill me you [ __ ] made it man you got a is that what it is I think so I mean yeah I think that it's a little bit of that because I know I put out female comics that change their name on the lineup because they can't put their name on the lineup because they have stalkers women have had much worse no I can't only imagine now I mean Esther ku when she was in San Francisco and I saw three of her stalkers there at the show oh god I don't know what to do they're just they make cakes for me and all this stuff and clothing pink cakes yeah okay so what's your handles Nick Nicholas Rutherford on Instagram I think that's really in Twitter is too much now I love the name Nicholas and the Philippines see what they would call Youkilis clueless that's cool so cool laughs rather for it on him give him a round of applause guys he was [ __ ] wonderful watch the unicorn it's on iTunes uh you know we're gonna take a photo you don't eat that okay okay but um take your rich wallet and thank you so much for coming here I thought you were amazing we had fun hopefully that you weren't angry about anything that I said no but this is what it is we got through it and it was wonderful there's if you think of back of all the things we've explored we explored all kinds of things about ourselves and our friendships and got very personal and and and yeah we got surface and with all kinds of stuff you know and don't mind the [ __ ] whites they're good these are good guys and that Netflix documentary we saw what's a call abducted in planes abducted in plain sight you have to see it because I'm going to say something right now he said it's not just sad is is that every once in a while the last thing I'm gonna say about it is sometimes white people they make the wrong choices looking at you George and especially the religious white they think they're oh you know we our foundation is Jesus yeah yeah we're stable yeah no you're not they feel [ __ ] safe Gracie crazy [ __ ] [ __ ] blind faith makes you think that pedophiles does don't exist yeah that it's not a possibility because God protects us and you know that the entire LDS coming and then what did I say about when we were watching that documentary what I say about George oh yeah that's what he said about you George he said that good why is it that every time I see George's face I just deep down think he's a serial killer no actually take that serial killer a pedophile they're just something about you friend you have all right and I don't know what it is vibe but hopefully hope yeah price hopefully hopefully we'll peel the onion all right and we will find just a nice guy right I'm gonna say this to you right now George all right I have my eye on you and if kalila and I ever have children you're gonna keep them away from you all right so anyway give Nick brother for another round of applause everybody guys thanks again to our sponsors rich wallet Adam and Eve in blue apron begin the year right 10% off her slim sleek front carry wallet just go to ridge walk calm and use the code belly enemy comm is offering 50% off almost any item plus 10 titillating free gifts for Valentine's Day just use the offer code belly a check out don't forget to check out this week's menu and get six dollars off at blue apron comm slash Valley and I'll Big Ups to our real papayas and super sleepers for the premium and the premium episode subscribers to our patreon if you want to hear more about the Korean knife saying go to patreon.com/scishow an Instagram ad tigerbhai on twitter Tiger belly and emails anyone helpful advice questions to the tiger girl gmail.com have a good night [Music] [Music]

Channel: TigerBelly

Views: 160,839

Rating: 4.8369069 out of 5

Keywords: tiger belly, tigerbelly, bobby lee, khalyla, gilbert galon, podcast, khalyla kuhn, tgrbly, all things comedy, nick rutherford, snl, good neighbor stuff, kyle mooney, jade catta-pretta, the unicorn, beck bennet, drunk history, lauren lapkus, With Special Guest Lauren Lapkus, earwolf, good neighbor, movie, stand up, comedy

Id: P2mnTFobCOE

Length: 86min 17sec (5177 seconds)

Published: Thu Feb 07 2019

Reddit Comments

[u/teenagetwink]

Since this dude was late I'm not gonna watch his movie

[u/OrbitDrive]

I could not believe Bobby had not seen Enter the Void. That is like "movie buff" 101 shit. Solid, albeit very disturbing (I mean, it IS Gaspar Noe) movie.

[u/YaMochi]

Craig Ferguson next guest confirmed? That's gonna be a good one!

[u/dinngoe]

I hope George snaps and KO's bobby one of these days.

[u/buffpriest]

Dude Mandy was such a peice of shit