My TikTok FYP Is PURE CHAOS

designer blonde really about things what are you doing here makes oh oh I didn't see them hello oh you are delightful to look at you remind me of my favorite drink cooking Rob did you know why because I crave you around me at all times and it could be problematic but we're not gonna talk about it Savvy hello everybody and welcome back to my YouTube channel or welcome to my YouTube channel I'm call me Jack Sparrow and you can call me Jack Sparrow and yes I did get a tattoo of a sparrow recently no it does not have to do with the fact that I love Jack Sparrow and he's one of my favorite characters in cinema I got it for my grandma okay but also a little bit for Jack Sparrow I'm not gonna lie here's me league and manic life decisions don't take after your auntie Chris anyway we are gonna be watching some tickety tocs and I don't really know what to expect because this is just my for you page so let's get to it [Music] are they really selling these kinds of dolls at Target oh my gosh those not so girl right I think I've seen her before she does a grill excuse you oh my God oh my God Jesus oh my God how she get like that so fast goddamn we don't have a Target in Canada but I really wish we did so I'm kidding that's impressive like she actually looks like one did they model them after her yeah she been like that popping oh he's like oh please can I wake up please oh my God that's so bad yeah oh I wish Kevin wasn't at puppy daycare right now oh I want a pet him so bad we both have separation anxiety I got him because I was anxious and then and then he ended up being anxious too and I were just just both anxious together guys are really sensitive brunella the car next to me at the red light looking over because I have my windows down me a short blonde woman wearing Gym gear and drinking an iced coffee it's me it's besides being short wearing Gym gear and drinking an iced coffee because I'm tall and I just wear sweats and I don't go to the gym and I don't drink ice coffee animal they drink hot coffee I think iced coffee is the sin I just love metal music it makes me happy it makes me my little heart happy inside I'm sorry if you can hear drilling outside [ __ ] you need to stop they're building a fence outside because I don't want people to come near me a horsey I look at him he's a pretty boy that's what I do when anybody confronts me with questions I can't answer I just run past them crop Dustin the best surprise for the birthday boys they can't get it oh yeah four balls cogs are so simple but it's so adorable I love that keep your girlfriend satisfied make sure you have a clean room let's see your local Target again with Target what the hell is this is this target why is Target all over my fyp I'm in Canada we don't have Target here I wish we did I think we did at one point no we didn't did we no we had Zellers that's what it was the off-brand Target at Sellers we have everything we don't even have Zellers anymore went out of business whatever it takes to become your first choice no you did not because you are now closed sad day for Canadian snow tarje God damn it anyway and they don't know what they want but if you see anything they might like just grab it my girlfriend loves dark chocolate we're just gonna grab these okay buying a bunch of stuff this is good that she likes I'm gonna grab both of these because I really don't know the difference honestly I don't know the difference between mine either and then all together it looks like this wow look at that oh and here me out what's your name Michael hear me out hear me out or let's see you could just make her but in all seriousness that really is it we are very simple creatures as as women we just want things that we're not going to tell you what we want but you kind of got to guess but it's usually pretty simple usually like chocolate little fluffy things like little fluffy animals it's just some time together it'll make us happy ain't none of those things nobody's giving me any of that stuff but that's okay I got you right yeah that's great oh my gosh why is my Fourier page all cute animals look at that little red panda look at him I like how he's standing he's just like this hello I love red pandas They look fake they look like they should just be a cartoon I guess it is cartoon isn't it what's that movie I never watched that movie looks like a good movie though what's a movie with the red panda Jay can you insert the cartoon movie with the red panda right here that movie adorable you aren't Batman let's be what oh really how do you explain this then I I love this guy's costume looks like he made it himself I'm Batman it looks pretty legitimate to me but I'm also Batman watch because I can do the voice really well watch Batman that sounded more like Venom but oh he was pretty good I need to get some Batman things oh wait I do have a Batman thing where's that Batman thing [ __ ] this is the worst one yet Mystique is a menace who's Mystique I love Mystique from X-Men because that's what we're talking about is it gonna be a woman oh it's a cat pretty girl I hate cats you're okay it's gonna kill you don't turn your back on that thing it's gonna eat you the way I would drop kick the cut into the star is fear of these [ __ ] mothers [ __ ] drilling into my [ __ ] house I can sweat again I can't hit it like you're real mad oh she flipped it off listen I don't want kids but I want that kid watch your kid because I'm coming again she knows what she wants or you want pizza oh she's so cute yes I don't want that kid too okay I don't want any kids but I'm gonna take those kids I'll ask first I'm kidding no no I don't want them I'll babysit them how about that you know the parents of these kids and I babysit them for a day yeah that's all I want I don't actually I don't want them for Life how Canadian fights start she's the last Timbits okay you gotta eat it I love how this is Yoda for some reason eat the freaking Timbit you eat the food oh you want me to eat it yeah I want you oh my God I love this are you happy I love Canadians I love being Canadian that is how all Canadians start it's just like oh hey there bud yeah he's just like when you look I I talk like how I am right now with you guys because I'm literally talking to an inanimate object right now but if I'm having a conversation with literally anybody that lives in Canada the accent and all the buds and and A's and and Timbits and or double double coffees just just come out of your butt you turn into uh a Canadian slash Irish that's what it kind of sounds like hey just go up for a Rippy get uh get a bunch of Tim bitsy with the double double and uh yeah just give her out there with a four by four and get a two by four and uh just hang out with buddies you know yeah no no no for sure yeah you must choose give your nails done in the river below oh my God that's so cute oh what a cute couple with their little Chihuahua dude I just want somebody that I can just goof around with and just act like a little kid with all the time and just never take anything seriously maybe some things but like most of the time just be confun and Goofy all the time together oh my gosh what is this oh God ostriches look at that dinosaur I see birds I hate ostriches wait is it dancing is that oh wait okay I hate birds but I like Fred I might get an ostrich now I do have chickens and they're helping me get over my fear of birds but I got this one [ __ ] chicken named Brenda Brenda is out to eat me okay here's some footage right here guys I'm in the Florida Everglades check out this American oh my god oh this is he may look like he wants to kill me but oh my gosh all right I'll give you your space I'm still this guy's been all over my for you page he literally just walks around the Everglades it is bare goddamn feet and just like documents all of it and he goes to all these like danger animals and he's he just doesn't care this guy thinks he has like 12 lives watch this I honestly don't even know what this is but look at this big old pictures it ended up beating me off camera and that felt great oh my God I just caught a fish dude this guy hey you linked up this non-native dude I've chilled swamp puppy doesn't even see me swap puppy check out this giant cotton [ __ ] no oh see that he's giving me a defensive posture telling me to stay back oh my God are those really poisonous I don't want to scare him when he sees it's me he's gonna take those are not swamp puppies okay those are swamp Raptors okay get the oh away from them I'm so worried about this guy truly oh damn oh God look at this Andrew oh my Lord this is so much is happening this is what I think I look like when I'm dancing in the kitchen by myself but this is what I actually look like foreign [Music] I don't have time trust men or drown me yeah jump in there same nah some of you guys I know you're real ones especially the ones watching this fist me I always say that and it always comes out and it just never comes out right how do you say this is oh it's no see even pound me sounds bad Hound me fist me if you want to reach me count me fist me if you want to reach me count me face me if you want to reach me found me if you want to reach me people should shut the [ __ ] up I'm bringing positive energy to the work this week and let this woman just shine her life 10 a.m Monday I love Jamie Lee Curtis listen I love me Mom but I would trade me Mom in for Jamie Lee Curtis to be my milk for Jamie Lee Curtis to be me Mom all right I don't know why she just gives off that like really fun mom energy you know I'm just kidding okay I'll keep my mom and then my mom could be with Jamie Lee Curtis she's not a lesbian but I feel like she was weird this went into a weird place I want two moms one my mom one Jamie Lee Curtis my dads could stay too I guess I don't know who would be my ideal celebrity family this is what we need to talk about right now uh live uh Robin Williams as my dad and Jamie Curtis as my mom and Will Ferrell as my uncle and Jim Carrey as my other uncle and Melissa mccarth worthy and Kate McKinnon as my auntie saw the family reunion would be so goddamn fun bro knows every single detail operation going on street from where you live give this man an Oscar that's like me trying to back up my friends when the principal's asking me I thought they like cheated on a testing class Christina did Ashley cheat off your testing class and I'd just be like no that's crazy mate why am I British now it's a great question definitely not a defense mechanism no definitely not gonna carry on into my into my later years into my early 20s and late 20s no definitely not gonna do that on a regular basis and use it as a coping mechanism no we both cheated on the test yeah yeah that's attention that way yeah all right oh my good Lord I have mercy on my soul I am all pools open for me but I'm not allowed in the pool you know what I'm saying everybody's swimming in the pool and I'm just on the outside like can I come nope okay okay oh my how is that no that's not real see okay this is a prime example of why you should never believe anything you see on social media she's using a filter to make her waist super small and her hips super wide to have this like snatched body it's really obvious in the frame she's acting like it's not but then it cuts and you can see it in the hips and the waist just don't compare yourself to people on social media okay just be happy with the person looking back at you in the mirror because that's all that matters everybody I hope you enjoyed the video and if you did please like the video because it really helps with the channel and also subscribe if you haven't subscribed this is obviously about this YouTube channel ever and uh yeah I hope you like the new space I haven't set it up completely yet we got Bob back there we got Pete back there we got everybody back there I think I'm gonna add some stuff flourishing up a little bit if you will I yeah I really appreciate you guys and um all your positivity all the time I'm eternally grateful and I will see your beautiful face in the next video okay bye

Channel: Kallmekris

Views: 1,678,474

Keywords:

Id: y_TEfBAnkfo

Length: 13min 26sec (806 seconds)

Published: Wed May 10 2023