My Pyromaniac Brother

[Music] hi welcome to bryson's cooking show today we are cooking cereal first add cereal then bryson what if i like pouring the milk first as i was saying first add cereal then milk and voila we've got cereal what wait wait no the gates of hell opened wide to receive thy sword now submit thyself to unending torment no please i'm a good boy oh no oh please save me [Music] hi i'm bryson and i once started a grease fire in my house and believe it or not this is not the first fire that the ham nations family has endured let me start at the beginning now almost all these stories revolve around one sibling the pyromaniac of the family my oldest brother brody now before i decimate my brother's reputation slander his name permanently and ensure that he's never allowed within 500 feet of a lighter ever again let me just preface with this i love you brody our journey begins when brody was three years old i remember it like it was yesterday except i wasn't even born yet my family was visiting our grandparents and uncles and my uncle mark decided to have some bonding time with brody it remains a mystery to this day what uncle mark was thinking but he decided to teach brody how to use a lighter and how to lock doors two essential skills for any three-year-old obviously in one fell swoop this knowledge transformed brody from a harmless toddler to a dangerous fire hazard capable of burning the house down brody put his knowledge to use immediately he locked himself in grandma's room hid under the bed and started melting the wax under there the bottom of the bed began to burn and the wax started melting down onto the carpet the family smelled the smoke and ran around the house looking for brody oh my god okay it's happening everybody stay calm the procedure everyone what's the procedure but the door was locked when they finally got in they saw brody with a lighter in hand standing next to a burning bed they put the fire out quickly as brody watched even though i wasn't there i can imagine brody grinning to himself because born inside him at that moment was a flame that would never go out this was the beginning of a lifetime of pyromania my parents were rightfully mad at uncle mark and years later they got back at him uncle mark's son was very young and my parents were visiting hey little guy come here i'm going to teach you how to use a lighter no no no does your family have a pyromaniac or are you normal my main goal is to blow up the next incident happened one year later brody was four and i remember it like it was yesterday except i was still not born yet mom was outside the house talking to a friend and brody was inside unattended he decided that he wanted a hot dog he had seen our parents use the microwave before and thought oh i just need to put it in the microwave hit a couple buttons and hit start so that's exactly what he did but he unknowingly set it to over an hour a while later mom's friend noticed smoke coming out of the windows in the house mom ran inside in a panic and found brody with his hot dog i tried to make a hot dog but all i got was a piece of poop the hot dog was reduced to a flaming carbon crisp burnt to the very core and that's how my family house almost got burnt down by a hot dog then the next year when brody was five he got glasses this time i remember it clearly except i still hadn't been born yet once again he was left unattended in the kitchen brody found a lighter sat on the counter and began lighting it over and over you know for entertainment then he thought i wonder if my glasses are fireproof he slowly began to raise the lighter closer and closer to his face and the lens cracked mom what what was that noise did you break your glasses yes and that's just the tip of the iceberg or fireberg brody in his teenage and adult life has regularly set paper towels on fire on the counter started fires outside for no reason and put tin foil in the microwave i'm not even joking hey brody what are you cooking uh and when brody was six he had to be held on a leash whenever he would go out yeah he was one of those kids however even the leash could not contain his chaotic nature because somehow in one day brody set off a car alarm an elevator alarm and an airport alarm if you haven't figured it out yet let me just spell it out for you brody was a menace to society he's still a menace but his wife keeps him in check most of the time now all these stories were about brody but this isn't brody's channel now it's time to talk about how i started a fire but at least it was an accident unlike brody who set stuff on fire on purpose also all brody's stories happened when i was just an unborn soul vibing in the quantum abyss i kinda miss it anyway on to my grease fire story at this point i had finally been born and i was about to start a family recipe with my roommate dallin the chicken was defrosting and it was almost ready so i put some oil in a pot and set the stove on low to heat up and be ready for the chicken at least i thought i did but i accidentally put the heat on maximum overdrive then i got distracted talking to dallin and forgot all about the chicken yes after a while the room suddenly started filling with smoke i wonder what that could be we looked and saw a plume of smoke coming from the pot as i ran over to try and fix my horrible mistake the smoke caught fire and blazed forth an eerie orange glow i saw into hell in that moment and the face of satan stared back at me then for an excruciating couple seconds i sat there frozen wondering what to do have you heard the term fight or flight well there's actually a third option freeze and my brain chose freeze dallin saw that i was paralyzed and quickly jumped into action he grabbed a ball and carefully covered the pot and extinguished the flame i was so embarrassed that my big strong roommate had to save me i very gingerly helped get rid of the smoke by opening the windows i cooled and cleaned the pot and very carefully finished the recipe hmm so good and tasty i also apologize profusely to dallan who insisted that it wasn't a big deal i honestly can't properly explain how embarrassed and ashamed i was i was just trying to be an adult and make a meal and i almost burned my house down but i learned a valuable lesson the lesson is have a roommate who's not afraid of fire i will be more careful in the future and hopefully next time i won't freeze to end things off i want to encourage you all to be careful and cautious when cooking because you could literally die also stay away from brody or he will burn down your house fortunately fire won't be an issue for me because since my fire incident i have mastered water bending and i've mastered fire bending don't do this brody don't challenge me it won't end well [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] i'm sparing you brother i'm letting you go in the name of our past friendship but i warn you even a single step out of line will result in your permanent end [Applause] whatever this game sucks anyway you're just mad cause you lost maybe but at least my house isn't on fire hi thanks for watching wasn't that fight scene amazing my team did a fantastic job animating it thanks to rush light invader and arowa for storyboarding it and thanks to my brother brody for making the music for the fight his wife played the flute for it as well links for them and the rest of my amazing team are down below if you want to support me and the team to keep making these videos please consider supporting me on patreon link below also i had a blast at vidcon thanks to everyone who came up and said hi at my meet and greets and came to my panels it was a blast your support puts me in this position and it's a dream come true so thank you so much i really appreciate your guys's love and support thanks for everything and goodbye forever

Channel: Haminations

Views: 7,199,385

Keywords: Haminations

Id: 51bF3tzEkLQ

Length: 10min 41sec (641 seconds)

Published: Fri Jul 08 2022