My kids have no contact with my in laws because of what they did

[Music] the incident backstory back in april of this year my husband 23 my daughter two and myself 23 were visiting with his parents at their house my in-laws went against our request that they not give our daughter slim jims by the time the conflict started she had already had three i was fed up with them not listening so i picked up my daughter and demanded to my husband that we leave he and i exchanged a few words as i was getting my shoes on my father-in-law picked up my daughter and walked off into the living room with her while holding her he started yelling at me i approached him and demanded that he give me my daughter so i could leave he refused i reached out for her and he turned away again refusing to give me my child i reached around him to try to get her he turned his back to me and kicked me in my lower stomach so hard it caused me to pee on myself knowing that i was 16 weeks pregnant at this time at this point i was completely terrified i got up and begged them to give me my daughter so i could leave he handed her to my mother-in-law i tried to get her from mill but she was squeezing her so tightly that i was afraid of hurting my daughter if i forced her out of mill's grip she shoved me back and phil grabbed me and slung me down into the recliner then began choking me my husband pushed him off of me i got up and grabbed my cell phone attempting to call nine double one phil hit me in the face and took my cell i ran into the kitchen to try and use their house phone to call nine double one he chased me down and took that phone destroyed it i ran back and played for mill to give me my daughter she refused at this point i saw phil throw my phone outside into the yard i went after it to try and find it so i could call the police but i couldn't they locked me out of the house i waited for what felt like forever for my husband to finally come out with my daughter we left i called the police dvp's were filed and charges pressed fast forward to now i ended up agreeing to drop dvps and charges because they had charges filed on us too and said if i dropped mine they would drop this small town they had everyone with a justice system in their county there were many reasons i agreed to drop everything the expenses of legal aid the mental toll the endless stress it would have caused me during my already high-risk pregnancy and my main reasoning to protect my husband from possibly having domestic battery conviction although he did nothing his mother had him arrested i agreed to drop the charges under the promise and understanding from my husband that our family was going to cut ties with my in-laws and i would not have to worry about myself or my children being around them ever again it's been about four months since this happened and only about one month since all the legal processes concluded i'm currently 36 healthy weeks pregnant with my second daughter my two-year-old has seemingly recovered from the trauma pretty well but still has obvious anxieties over loud talking or physical contact even play fighting the problem at hand recently my husband has begun speaking to his parents again and visiting them as well they are sending gifts for my children and offering help with groceries bills etc even though it's not what we agreed on i've tried to be as understanding as i can be because they are his parents so we fought and fought over it and i finally agreed that yes he could speak to them if that was what he needed to get us to a point where it wasn't going to ruin our marriage a week or two passes and we start to fight over our children being around them i don't think they deserve to have my children and their lives ever he wants her girls to have a significant relationship with them eventually i agree that yes in time and i specified that it would not be within the next year as i need time to heal from what happened i would allow our daughters to spend time with them in public settings only never in their private home under my supervision this was agreed upon another short amount of time has passed by and has already asking to take our two-year-old to their house to visit them has made comments about taking our yet to be born daughter to see them too what i need help advice with i've given as much as i can mentally handle any more and it would be completely unfair to what i need and what i think is best for our children and their safety so i've refused to budge anymore though things are at a cool down phase right now i'm afraid that this will eventually turn into another month of misery and fighting or longer because i just cannot give it any more i don't want to lose my husband i don't want my marriage to fall apart because i won't give into what he wants again is there anything i could do to make this work is there any way i can show him that i've done enough how can i fix this is there a way i can protect my children from these people and save my marriage am i in the wrong have i done enough after all the great insight from the radic community and you're shoving me into reality i spoke to my husband i made it clear to him that myself and our daughters were going permanently no contact with his parents or i would be forced to divorce him and have legal boundaries set in place to protect our children from mill and phil no exceptions i asked him to go no contact for a little while so we could bring our second daughter into the world with no stress and to just work on our marriage he agreed to two months things were going so so good he even seemed to leave the fog for a bit admitted that mill was a manipulative b that two months is up now has been talking to them again a little bit though i still can't quite understand why he wants to yesterday he told me he sent some pictures of the girls from halloween to mill she replied with your dad started crying when he seen those pics of your he wants to see his grandchildren so what i knew would happen my husband asked if the girls would ever get to see his parents i held my ground and said no it was never happening i didn't cave and say well maybe someday or not right now etc just to try and avoid a fight or upsetting him i told him just know that i still stand by what i said two months ago and that wasn't changing i've heard my moments of well maybe i can try to work something out someday maybe that would be easier things might change they might change when i think about what the future holds but then i think about what they did to me refresh it over i remember frantically pushing him off from choking me and reaching for my cell phone hysterically crying and shaking and trying to call nine double one and mill tries to grab my phone and screams and laughs and mocks at me saying you think you're going to call nine double one and then phil hits me in the face and takes my cell land and threatens i dare you to call the police i ran to the kitchen to get the house phone and he chases me shoves me into the counter and smashed the phone i remember immediately after we got out they called and demanded we want your daughter every sunday from one to seven or we are going to take you to court and sue for custody and grandparents rights i remember every time mill talked about it saying what sam did to us we did nothing wrong i remember the texts what you can do is grow a set of balls and be a man and get your bee under control and let her know we are going to be a part your and your children's lives now not in a year you can't let her keep doing this because it will get her nothing she will never have power over us and yes that's what she wants i'm done trying to get over the be you are married to who the hell does she think she is she can stick her children up her fat or what sanded to your dad and me will never be forgotten or forgiven you know she started it all etc etc etc i remember everything and it makes me so so angry and i remind myself that i'm not in the wrong that i'm protecting my children at any and all costs i will never budge i will never change my mind no matter what happens never wish me luck with husband i'm sure i will have more updates in the future the re-established contact only started a couple days ago maybe updates for just know so too eduard slim jim psycho i think is the best nickname for my mill especially since this whole incident was caused over her giving my daughter slim jims after being repeatedly asked to stop kind of a reminder that she has been undermining my authority as a parent since my first daughter was born my mill is still on her just no [ __ ] but my husband and i have actually been able to share some laughs over her behavior has no longer full on defending every stunt she pulls the other day she sent him a screenshot of some pictures i took and posted about the girls spending time with their grandma with a text that followed saying you know sam can have her deucing family but denies you yours so duck her random his reply okay i think i could feel her stumping around and throwing a temper tantrum from two counties away lol what gets me is that we spend thanksgiving with his family his aunt grandpa cousins etc and she threw a fit about that too so while you are there remember you could have come here with your kids and been with family who really loves you and when you wait too long to be with us and we are gone you can always thank sam you say it's about how you feel but what about us and how we feel etc oh and here's another good one she called him a few days back and said i seen sam and the girls and her grandma at the mall saturday are no you didn't husband's name in that winnie b tone i'm sure you can all imagine a just know me losing no you didn't she was with me all day saturday that shut her up real quick and she got off the phone almost instantly she texted him later that night saying she was sorry and that she was misinformed about saturday and that someone was just trying to cause problems he replied with i thought you saw them and why would that even cause a problem in the first place she changed the subject lol anyways i could go on and on about the just no mill i'm getting to a point where i can just laugh at all her batshit crazy antics especially now that it seems my husband could be clearing from the fog a bit man it feels good to finally see a little light at the end of this tunnel any ideas on a good mill nickname i can use for any future posts so i don't have to keep using reference to the original title and everyone can still know who i am and the history of the mills just knows i have three daughters 14 and two seven-year-olds twins my husband is an only child and my sister has two girls seven months ago i found out i was pregnant again both my husband and i were happy if a little shocked i was on the pill so a few months later we went along to the first scan checking it wasn't twins again twins run in our family i'm a twin and my father was one luckily it wasn't however we learned that the baby was going to be a boy we were both very excited as this was the first baby boy in our family eventually we told our extended family just no mill being the first we'd told now we'd had some problems in the past tried to force us to change my kids names grumbled about them all being girls so when we told her she was ecstatic she even threw a baby shower for me something we'd never done with our three girls when my oldest asked her why she'd thrown it she rolled her eyes and told her that it's a boy so it's the most important baby i was horrified she said the same to my seven-year-olds and they ran to me crying that they didn't want the brother anymore just no mill didn't bother to apologize to anyone stating that boys are better and there is a reason we only had one child my husband hasn't spoken to her since although she sends baby products such as fancy cribs and prams i explained to her that we already had things from when the girls were younger and she dismissed it by saying boys deserve the best before i was pregnant just no mill sent my girls some money every month varying from 20 to 100 every time the girls were overly grateful and they've saved it in a bank account for when they rolled her but since we've told her about our son she has stopped sending this money instead setting up a bank account in her name dedicating it to our son now we are not upset that she stopped sending the money we were always confused on why she did it but we are upset that the reason for her stopping the money is that we are having a son my husband and i are very confused on what to do with her as she's blatantly cutting out my daughters to accommodate my son edit i've spoken to my husband and we've agreed to go no contact until after the baby is born my oldest is upset but we've explained why we've done it and she's been mature enough to understand thank you for the advice and kind words so a couple of days ago i posted on here telling you about how my just no mill prefers my son to my three daughters we spoke with my girls and we all agreed that it was just better to not speak to just no mill yesterday i went food shopping something i knew my girls hated so i allowed them to stay home my oldest is 14 and knows how to stay safe so long as she looked after the twins i didn't mind so i go shopping and i do take quite a while because we haven't been shopping for a little while after i've got everything i go home and i see just no mills car parked away up the street i didn't think this was out of the ordinary since she has a couple of equally witchy friends living in our street until i reach my house my dog is outside something i told the girls to not do we have only just got him and he is scared of the cars on our busy street this is when i started to get suspicious my just no mill does not like dogs or any kind of animal really so i go inside and she is sitting on the couch with my oldest daughter sitting silently and my twins crying in a corner i ask her what she's doing there and she tells me with the most smug smile on her face that she's teaching the girls that they need to make room for the baby as he's a superior i was absolutely furious both at the fact that she was in my house and second that she'd poison the minds of my little girls they're seven and fourteen i screamed at her to get out and she saunted out with that same smug smile and i was fuming my oldest told me that she'd let herself in and when she'd asked why she was here she told the girls that my husband had sent her to teach them about how they were worth less than my girls i had to comfort them again telling them that they were exactly equal and i loved them a lot when my husband got home we arranged for our locks to be changed and a motion sensor to be installed is there anything else we can do to stop just no mill from doing this edit too we've texted just know mill and emma old her saying that she is not welcome on our property at any time we've contacted the police telling about her emotional abuse to my girls we've bought a nest camera for our front and back garden we've had to buy a new lock for our gate so our dog can't get through we've bought a tracker to install in his collar so we know where he is we've contacted the hospital to tell them that just no mill will not be anywhere near us for the birth of my son we've invested in therapy for my girls so that they know that we are not replacing them with the new baby they're just no mill or mrs as they know her now is wrong about the sun being superior i'm stressed my husband is stressed my oldest is scared my twins are upset it's all over the place and we don't know what to do we've applied for a restraining order nearly all of this costs money and we just need to hope to pray that that is the only thing that comes our way we can't afford to buy more things to keep just normal away from our family we can't afford to have another baby and keep our family away from her it's scary and i'm scared we don't know what's going to come at us next [Music] you

Channel: Ask Girl

Views: 52,436

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Keywords: reddit girl, reddit mil, reddit money, reddit mother in law, justnomil, jnmil, r/justnomil, reddit justnomil, r/askreddit, r/girl, r/mil, r/money, r/motherinlaw, r/, askreddit girl, reddit, askreddit mil, askreddit mother in law, askreddit justnomil

Id: Rw76IpTEu08

Length: 17min 22sec (1042 seconds)

Published: Wed Jan 06 2021