My iPhone Lied To Me | Gabriel Iglesias

so my girl started tripping out and i started getting these weird phone calls finally i got tired of it i said you know what i don't need this you know i don't need it from now on when i take off on the road no more phone calls look at that guy yeah are you here by yourself [Music] whatever dude anyway here's the thing i took my girl to the apple store and i got her an iphone i got myself one and i said from now on we're texting each other and believe it or not she was cool with that because anytime she would send me a text i would reply like that i could be anywhere freaking in the bathroom freaking what are you doing i'm blowing it up i love you sam and she replied oh my god me too i love you it sounds so stupid but it was working out perfectly until one night i got drunk oh you want to hear this you want to hear this so check this out i'm leaving a comedy club in san jose california and i'm walking back to my hotel room which is one block away as i'm walking i pass in front of this bar on the corner called cnet bar it's got all kinds of cinema and movie memorabilia in there it looks cool i'm walking in front and there are people in that bar that just left my show so i walk in front and i heard fluffy hey let me buy you a shot i was like well you know i don't want to be rude can't have that right so i walked in i said what's it you know i'm on my way back to my room i just do a couple shots whatever so you know one shot and then somebody me two all right me too come on let's do it me three me four 15 shots of tequila later it occurs to me i think i should go i start walking towards the door i took three steps the cold air hit me i got dizzy and i fell hard i know i felt hard cause when i hit the ground i farted [Applause] my buddy martine ran over and he helped me up off the ground are you okay here okay we stumbled back to the hotel room i sit down in the lobby and i'm just like are you okay gabriel i'm okay man where's my phone i gotta let my girl know i'm okay you're holding it oh thank you martine i love you i love you your girlfriend man you're a girlfriend because what are you doing i'm a text you just call her no if i call her she's gonna know something's up i'm gonna text her watch baby i made it back to the hotel i love you sand clean how did it go i farted i shouldn't tell her that i'm gonna date okay it went good what did you do after your show oh here we go my buddy martinez like gabriel man gabriel don't tell her don't tell her you're at a bar getting drunk man don't tell her martine i have to tell her the truth bro we're cool like that man i could talk to her i could i could tell her anything man she's not like you're old lady you know tripping all the time hey martin take the pictures out of the coaching off the internet whatever i'm sorry did i say that out loud forgive me bro gabriel lied i can't lie man lie i can't lie are you that honest no i just won't remember the lie i get in trouble two times for the same stupid thing you know what i'm saying so i sent the message baby i made it delete delete delete baby i went next door with martine to cena bar had a nice time kissy face kissy face kissy face send clean lucky you wish i could have been there with you tell martin i said hi i love you oh my god martine i just told my girlfriend i was at a bar with you and she didn't get mad what the hell is she doing man she told me to tell you hi and she don't even like you so i scrolled back to read what she read and apparently my stupid iphone has this memory spell check feature and it didn't recognize the word cnet bar it flipped it and turned it into cinnabon so apparently at 10 o'clock at night my girlfriend thought i was having cinnamon rolls with my friend martine which normally would sound like an ugly lie but considering her boyfriend is known as the fluffy guy who loves chocolate cake it sounds real i was like oh my god martin check it out my iphone lied for me [Applause] blackberry can't do that [Laughter] a month later my girlfriend heard me tell the story and she's like that's a funny joke i go it really happened how come you didn't tell me i said the phone didn't let me and her friends are right there see he's also getting wasted sending you messed up taxes whatever shut up haters you

Channel: Gabriel Iglesias

Views: 6,269,627

Keywords: gabriel iglesias, stand up comedy, gabriel fluffy iglesias, fluffy, comedy, funny videos, comedy videos, gabriel iglesias full show, gabriel iglesias magic mike scene, gabriel iglesias racist gift basket, gabriel fluffy iglesias one show fits all, gabriel fluffy iglesias snoop dogg, gabriel fluffy iglesias hablando español, apple, iphone, iphones

Id: fcddr9t1LqM

Length: 6min 13sec (373 seconds)

Published: Thu Apr 08 2021