Man Spends £23,000 on Car He Can’t Drive | Spendaholics | Only Human

[Music] meets 22 year old Jonathan Paul a Senior Account Executive with a very expensive obsession my big big passion is officer cars I do love cars in every way it's just the passion for joining outside of work John's life is dedicated to cars as are his mates they all belong to the same online car community and like him spend any spare time and money fueling their high-octane lifestyle he might earn a healthy 20 grand plus bonuses but he is 17,000 pounds in debt and counting mostly spent on customizing and creating the ultimate show car 11,000 pounds brand-new two years ago these are the wheels and they cost me a thousand pounds this is the new airbag suspension and this was 2,000 pounds I've also paid for new doors i body kit and the labor to do the car so it comes to types of 12,000 pounds but doesn't include the interior or the paint job that's 23,000 pounds spent on a car that's not even Road worthy it does get the press thing you can take yourself buying all this money I could have bought a house or some like that it's time to put the brakes on his spending wild lifestyle expert Jay hunt will look for other ways for John to get the car buzz would you feel if you were driving up to one of the shows in one of these be feeling pretty flash psychological coach Benjamin Frye will delve into what's driving John to spend spend spend so you're basically gonna switch through your mental blocks and out into the light but will John steer himself back into the black I know I've screwed up and I shouldn't go and got the loans but my rules are to do it now live by the consequences afterwards I do need to stop being like that [Music] at only 22 Jonathan Paul is saddled with the 17 thousand pound debt and each month he slips further into the red [Applause] [Music] his typical Vlad's lifestyle involves regular socializing a twenty a day smoking habit a passion for boys toys and an intimate knowledge of the local kebab shops it all adds up at the moment I'm just living in my overdraft then my pay goes in the first couple of weeks who kind of like I've got bit money what the hell I can spend oh go out on a few beers get friends and then towards the end you know the last car two weeks I've become a bit for her I met and stay indoors and that really gets to much but it's a drop in the ocean compared to where the big money goes John's life revolves around his car club x2c an online community of modified motor nuts it's a big part of my life the cyclists second family as well as spending thousands on customizing cars weekends are spent traveling up and down the country to car shows it's not just the mileage that clocks are I've got ones up north you're paying for hotel rooms about 60 70 quid and I and then he got accepted tickets again it was about 35 quid I mean she living costs for the weekend basically and the astronomical costs hadn't stopped John by not one not two but three cars his girlfriend Emma thinks he's losing the plot he's other Kai's for the mr2 wasn't really necessary to go for an expensive fast car to be quite honest he only needed a cheap one around for the time being John can't see beyond his master plan to convert his Fiat Stilo into the ultimate dream machine and his spendings hit fifth gear well perhaps upon the steel I was so I could do it up be able to tend the shows and we had to get the looks and you know get the car in the magazines and in the adverts and get all the you know fame and glory from that to discover what's behind Jon's desire to build an attention-seeking motor Benjamin and Jay need to find out what makes him tick he rents a room at a fellow car club members house so while it's empty they wangle the keys for a good nose around Jay is looking for clues as to where the money's going while Benjamin's more interested in why he does it someone who didn't know me would think of me it's a difficult question I think we obviously saw Titan actors as the various car parts that struggled over there in the in the room and this is a DVD collection and magazines and we'll be surprised at how much the little space I've got cozy cozy good all these cufflinks that's his girlfriend it's quite young nice selection of aftershaves always toys magazine it's all car magazines I don't think those are exclusively about cars I think there's another specialist interest involved cars and girls in the same magazine nice pair of Eve's on the wrong trousers just casually how not like that gosh expensive not cheap and then just loads more boys stuff well this car stuff everywhere I mean it's like this piece of a car on top of your television why would you want that there you know what's odd in this room Jay is not the fact that a young man has kind of pictures of girls and cars and whatever but it's the single bed I just don't think it's that cool to be living in a single bed when you're 22 is it actually not a pink sheets fairly typical stuff so far more girls and cars but the office is much more fruitful look there's the website I think yeah there is there is still a John the yellow John lives in Wallington drives a steel oh I wonder how much good all this curse stuff is costing now you find out CMW car sales limited 1626 that's his new outstanding balance 2368 good loads of them and bank statements what's that invoice that's it the fiat stilo so he's paid a thousand pound deposit thousand pound for 22-inch pmw annihilators does that mean something to you I think there's a wheels Jay and six and a half grand which is half upfront is an expensive thing I'm gonna take these with us do you think he thinks if he has the right car he'll get one of these nice young ladies to hang out with them I have no idea but I'm gonna find out that's for sure [Music] it's time to turn John's turbocharged attention on to the state of his bank balance our financial fixers have arranged to meet him at the body shop where most of his cars are modified but is he prepared for their lesson in customized credit control could this be the man himself I think we've just come to see the body shop where they're the steal I usually lives the stealer the steal Osaka sort of personally and it actually we're not here to talk about cars right to talk about money yeah so you better come with us okay it's gonna be a lot less fun than that in the world of car modification everyone's dream is to get their souped-up vehicle on the cover of a magazine with that in mind our credit Crusaders have created their very own so here we are the first issue of fast credit in magazine that we especially had commissioned to explain to the general public the pleasures and the pain and the cost of owning your Frontera how much do you think that would be I bought it for 1,600 pounds yeah and then I had to pay 200 or so pounds getting a suspension sorted out and then I'll say as petrol on top and bits and pieces like that a bit of money yeah well the actual total is two thousand nine hundred and thirty pounds you surprised yeah a lot more I thought I think about it I need to get on the cover but John story needs much more coverage welcome to the first issue of driven to death this magazine is all about how much money you spend on both the Fronteras and the mr2 how much do you think you've spent on them to date not sure looking at the frontier figure and then the mr2 in total I don't know about five six thousand pounds well the total for this is seven thousand five hundred and sixty pounds Joran eight thousand pounds yeah and that's nothing compared to the headline-grabbing total he spent on all three cars you've made it to the cover of maxed out now this magazine is all about your expenditure on all of your cars your steel oh your mr2 your Frontera the insurance the tax the petrol car shows magazines everything you've spent money on in the last three years on cars so John how much do you think the grand total of all of that is I think looking at there the first and second posters are written the reason about 25,000 the actual total for this is fifty four thousand six hundred and thirty three pounds ninety two pence how do you feel about that a lot more than I expected a lot more well it's a bit silly that's a silly money could have bought a nice Porsche that yeah how do you feel about this shocked yeah it's quite quite surprising there how big the figure is it's horrible when you see it all bare as a total isn't it doesn't kind of clock when the invoices come in and it's 200 quid here and 300 there but when you add it all up like that that's when it really looks a bit scary can you carry on spending this kind of money on cars no that's gonna be a problem for you yeah John's reeling from the revelation of his spend on cars now Benjamin and Jay want to tackle another of his indulgences now John is your very own special kebab mountain which I presume you approve of yeah what we've got here is 250 kebabs each representing 20 pounds because we worked out in the past year on your drinking your snacking your socializing it's actually ended up to 5,000 pounds is that more than you thought cause I'm serious snacking that's quite worrying it's not a kebab so it's not just a kebab no I know obviously that's the thing the socializing is sort of a big part of it it's a big part of the club and the group of friends I have with site babs give up the motors yeah yeah John might be laughing now but they're about to wipe the smile off his face [Music] so John what we're going to do now is work out with you how much you think is the minimum amount of money you can live on for seven days during your cold turkey week but before we do that I just wanted to ask you how much you think you get through on an average week first sort of taught up that includes cigarettes during petrol and things like that and looking it up now about 100 pounds a week quite easily right you spend well we've been through all your statements and I can tell you that it's a bit more than a hundred pounds because you get through 312 pounds and 6p in an average week Wow which is three times as much as you thought you were spending yeah a lot more and that's just a non-essential stuff that's not on your rent or your bills or anything it's a lot more than I was expecting definitely well it's a lot of money when you do every week so how much do you think you could actually live on bare minimum for the next seven days I wouldn't know where to start probably about sixty pounds 60 pounds so you reckon sixty quid that's nonsense isn't it 16 I was gonna say thirty quid and I do think to make it completely confidence building and that give you an extra five quid for sympathy and this is for non-essential items 35 quid if you really concentrate I reckon you can do that it's only for seven days they'll get me about five miles pitchfork in the mr2 or a point will get me a point how many kebabs can you get for five quid just probably one night in so here's the interesting thing you're gonna have to choose between for example driving somewhere or drinking something or eating it come back you're already beginning to get what cold Turk is really about because the idea is that by having to make these really hard choices and giving stuff up you're actually forcing yourself to discover what's really important to you what you can live without and what you can't I think John cope really well actually with a cold turkey and the shock tactics but I do sense that he's in denial about the figures we've come up with which are actually accurate so I'm not sure whether I'm gonna see a bit of rebellion along the way how do I spend a pound of weight I do not have a clue it's mental but you know be interesting to sort of sit down and actually have a look and see where that money goes because I'd never you know I don't walk around the throne liquid cash a week I never draw that Matt swear date and I think maybe the problem is that because I don't have the cash on me I put it all on card so I'm not so registering it it's just sort of present card don't worry about anything about it later it's day one of cold turkey and with only five pounds a day to live on you'll have to get creative with his budget and he's off to a good start it's lunchtime usually I stop and have a sandwich and a blog or whatever or go to the sandwich shop or I go to the CAF but I've seen today save some money on culture can I eat spaghetti bolognese last night and go from there he spent nothing all day but back home the car club message board is buzzing with big plans for a midweek night out something to whet his social appetite it was a very very tempting the month to be going out tonight a lot of people are thinking about going out to a club you're starting tonight it's only sort of nine o'clock and I was sort of getting convinced by the rest of the guys to come out for a few drinks very tempted but we'll see I really want to stick to the the cold turkey week as much as I can and not spend much at all come the weekend John still hasn't touched his cold turkey budget he's even black to ticket for a car show but with prices running into the tens or even hundreds of thousands here's 35 pounds should be safe like a kid in a candy store he's hungry for much more come the end of the afternoon the thing that I'm hoping for in the next year Bennet one of the top end shows throughout the season he escapes the car show without spending a penny but to get home the mr2 needs petrol and that's going to take more than the extra fiver Jay gave him I've just spent 19 pounds 85 that's buy some cigarettes and had to put 15 pounds of petrol in the mr2 so it leaves me with 15 quid for the rest of the week not too worried yet got a cut-down smoking a bit so as for the rest of the night I think it's just gonna be a night in boring [Music] so far John's coping well on his cold turkey budget but if he wants to make it a longer term commitment he needs to understand what motivates him to spend Benjamin arranges a meeting he wants to get to the bottom of John's obsession with cars and find out why his identity is so tied up with a car club what can you tell me about this car club then and the people in it why is this such an easy utopian place to be it's just yeah everyone's got the similar interest everyone's got their love for cars everyone gets on well more than anything I've found a decent crowd to chill out with relax with and decent bunch of friends trying people you fit in with and feel accepted by which is a big deal and I think there's a sense in which you need to spend the money to keep in with the game if you were spending a lot of money on cars and you just have a little bit more of the limelight those charged they want better mail why tell me about it it's coz unique certain that hasn't been done before and probably won't be done again everyone who will see that car when I heard it belongs to it it's it's mine there's no ignoring you and you know then dal ah'd of people are talking about it which is nice it's right above it you do yeah yeah doesn't everybody attention has the connotation of vanity yeah I don't think that's you yeah that's always been I've always worried about that you could easily be mistook for that yeah I think because I thought it's one thing I'll always try not to be an attention seeker I don't want to be seen as someone who's paying somebody who seeks attention or that has I hate to be seen like that and yet that's exactly how you portray yourself in one hand then you talk about yeah but it's not tension as its recognition yeah it is simply being allowed to be who you are be seen be noticed and not be alone let's think a little bit about the attention and why that's important to what it means I think Bobby stands back from school didn't have the greatest time at school bullied at junior school big time what were you bullied about teeth what's wrong with too many teeth and big buck teeth that dodgy haircut was that rough yeah and carried on in senior school I always used to think to myself oh it would be nice to have a different face that's all right mm-hmm yeah you just wanted to be someone else yeah altogether probably because the person you were was getting bullied huh let's think about that someone else the person you wanted to be any idea what that person would have been new it would have been how people would have treated him the guy could always like pack the joke and make people laugh and in the in the lessons of things lat so just probably someone a bit popular popular yeah I guess the same fantasies are still there in some ways of transforming yourself and changing your name being more popular getting more attention if we think about the transformation of a Fiat Stilo and giving yourself a fantasy name stealer John it's a new name it's a new facade are you sure that you've really left all this behind he's been put through the emotional wrangle now he wants to let off steam having spent five nights in John gives in to temptation and joins the crew for their usual Thursday night get-together but with food cigarettes and alcohol to buy here's 15 remaining pounds disappear it's been difficult I've seen every thing I've done has made me think Oh should I be spending the money I was really quite surprised how much of money I need to last the week this is stressful for the rest of my life necessary luckily Jays been through John statements and drawn up a more realistic regime the good news is it won't be half as bad as cold turkey the bad news is it won't be half as good as he'd like in the main John spending is directed at his car now Jay wants to show him where else it's going now John what we've got here is your new budget but before we have a look at this I just wanted to ask you how you'll get on on your cold turkey wait I blew it okay I wouldn't say I blew it big time but I definitely went over the 35 quid they obviously generously gave it from what Benjamin was saying but still less than you'd normally spend anyway I sort of kept a record at work every day what I was spending on and things like that and and you've never done that before no I've always wanted to do it but never got around to actually sort of planning it all down and writing it all down so what we've got here is your new budget okay now what we've done is run through your current expenditure and it won't be any surprised to know that at the bottom you're overspending by 874 pounds 15 every month so we can see the debt is getting bigger and bigger now what we've done is done a new budget for you made some cuts in areas we think are sensible and the good news is at the end of the day we've even given you a buffer of 36 pounds 71 see one of the areas that really stands out is groceries eating out work lunches now I know that you did actually make your own lunch didn't you right a few days yes bit difficult but yeah well we'd like you to do that a bit more because that would mean that your work lunches would be reduced from a hundred pounds to thirty and eating out and takeaways if we can cut back a bit on that it'll bring it down from 265 to 125 that would be a total saving of 210 pounds a month which adds up to over two and a half thousand pounds a year well worth cutting down on the kebabs next in the firing line is his twenty a day smoking habit no no giving up cigarettes is on your list of things you want to do when you see it written down though 150 pounds a month on it how does that make you feel it's surprising it's a lot more I actually thought it was if John kicks the habit he'll save another 1,800 pounds a year Jane knows exactly what he should do with the money if you could pay 210 pounds a month on your credit card instead of the 60 pound minimum payment you're paying at the moment it would only take nine months of time to get all of those paid back but it's not like oh this is endless and endless it's like a real effort for nine months then it's gone there's just one final area where John could make huge savings in the last year his biggest monthly outlay has gone towards customizing his Fiat Stilo and since he's already paid for most of the work upfront his average costs should now come down substantially you know the last few months I haven't been I haven't needed to spend anything and the next couple months I hopefully won't need to spend anything either so I've got two hundred-pound down there's the recommendation I hope they'll be able to bring that down even more now we have done this as quite a realistic budget because obviously this is going to be your long-term budget are there any areas when you look at that that you think all you're really feeling panicked I think the thing that I need to sit down and work out is how I'm actually gonna you know write this all down and be able to sort of interpret it in the future so what we need to do is to take all the information that's on here and plunk it in John's world in a way that you can access every day to make you feel that you're in control of your own money that's the problem because I'm feeling so out of control I don't know what I'm doing with it so John is now going to be in control fingers crossed we know so J wastes no time in helping him start and begins with takeaways and eating out John and girlfriend Emma regularly go out for pizza and pasta it's time to transfer their love of Italian food from the restaurant into the kitchen with the new budget we know that that's going to be an occasional treat if you fancy something like that so I thought if you do get a craving desperately want a pizza it would be better if you know how to make them so today we're gonna have a lesson learning how to make really good pizzas okay are you up for that yeah all right let's go to the kitchen hi Sebastian how are you yeah nice to see you this is John I think that apron got his name on it [Music] hits your eye like a big pizza pie that's amore making pizza from scratch isn't hard even if he bought a ready-made bass John could still cook up a romantic dinner for two at a fraction of the cost of eating out so while he gets to grips with his toppings Jay catches up with Emma whose job gives her a real insight into the pressure of coping with debt so Emma you work there's a debt collection officer don't you for one of the high street banks so you're dealing every day with people who've got into a huge mess with credit cards how'd you feel when you see all that money of his going on the cars you know I was really really worried about him and I thought one day could be mean or one of my friends ringing him up talking about his debt and how he's gonna be repaying us back that's not a nice feeling you know when you first met him was he very open about being in debt or did it take a while before you knew no I don't think he even realized what money was going out and what it was actually going on I just think you know he's got money in his bank and he was just spending it do you feel that some of the things he used to do together have stopped because he's actually in debt we don't go out as much as we used to I mean we used to go out nearly every single weekend go out for a meal all the time and I think we didn't realize even I do realize I was really worried the money was actually going and then when he says buying a new car and what he wants to do to that car it's a bit well know calm down but it's not all bad news Jay's discovered ways they can enjoy time out on a budget so you're becoming an expert now yeah but you are going to be on this budget for quite some time so we've been trying to think of some ways that you could do things together and they aren't too expensive so what we did was come up with some ideas where you can enjoy London for under a tenner so you can still have a nice time but can't pay well we've got some information for you lots of websites where you can research restaurants where if you eat earlier for example you can get really great deals and then we found this fabulous cinema in the West End where you can go on a Saturday and watch a film for four quid so all of this sort of stuff is something where you could plan to go out and still keep within budget because what we don't want you to do is to get completely fed up and bored and then suddenly guess what he's brought another car that is what we want to avoid so your homework John is going to be to use the internet and anything else you like but plan one day a month probably in London where Emma gets a London Street day for the two of you okay sounds good yeah [Music] it's been a week since John began his new regime so far so good but he bees to make inroads into his seventeen thousand pound debt he's going to have to make big sacrifices especially where the cars are concerned all the Fronteras for sixteen hundred pounds had it for about six seven months now and we was telling it tomorrow for five hundred sixty pounds it's just been sitting here for the last two months not doing anything so got the LRT is my weekend John there's no point having two cars it's not insured or tax or anything it was just one of those impulse buys which is a silly thing a minute he's gotta go he might have lost the ground on the Fronteras but he's learning to prioritize meanwhile his pride and joy the steelo is back in the body shop when he bought it brand new it cost him eleven grand now his dream of creating a top-of-the-range show car with gold wing doors 22 inch wheels and a thumping sound system is costing another 12 grand and there's very little to show for it steel as it is now is worthless I couldn't go and put on the general market because it would pretty much be classed as a write-off there's no point is stopping yeah you know people tell me water support and keep piling the money in but I'm at a position now where if I start but they lose everything if I don't stop yeah I lose a bit more money that spent a bit more money but at the end of the day I'll get what I wanted out of it so it is worth it John's beginning to understand the correlation between his cars and his cash crisis but things are going to get a lot worse before they get better it's the run-up to Christmas and temptation to spend is everywhere for John however there's nothing to celebrate he calls on Benjamin to talk things through yeah it's sort of a mutual agreement wasn't a horrible break or anything like that but right it's just not the right time it's a bad time of year for me I don't enjoy the time of year at all because a lot of bad things happen in the last four years so do you want to talk about the specifics of what's been difficult my best friend died on Christmas Day four years ago so that was kind of traumatic and that was a really bad time and then I had my granddad died around this time of year again two years ago and then this year I found out that my mum's stepdads not too well either now so there's been a lot of a lot of trauma really around the holiday season and the legacy of it is a real well in a real way a christmas phobia time of year where you're so burdened by the history of it they do you want to push everyone away from you it could be that it is difficult for you to want to have someone close to you bye Emma mmm when you're about to go through a difficult time of year again so there's definitely something to be said for working on your Christmas phobia and putting Christmas in a new night and understanding not just the shocks you've had recently but what it is in your life leading up to that time that made it so difficult for you to cope with those events because there's a clues in there for us about why it is so important for you to in a sense buy attention the - they don't lead to each other but I think they may both be symptoms of the same root cause the season of goodwill isn't running true for John in an attempt to lift his spirits Jay decides to tackle another of his bettin wores smoking she's devised something that should help him feel a lot better and have a positive effect on his wallet at the same time John I know you want to give up smoking and also if we could save that extra money every month that would really help so I thought you'd hear today nothing to be alarmed about all you've got to do is sit calmly and listen to a hypnotherapist you're willing to give it a go okay well try it hey John so what I normally do then is literally get all of your triggers hypnotherapist Allison Monroe starts by going through his daily smoking routine one start at lunch one at the end of lunch if I go to the pub I have I've known five or six he smokes a lot more than he thought I really really hope that this is gonna work for John it's not easy giving up I've done it I know how hard it is so I really really feel for him today but I think it's a really great thing and also even though people say oh I can't afford to go and have one of these hypnotherapy sessions and give up most people do a money-back guarantee so if you start smoking again you get your money back you absolutely can't lose [Music] yes just finished it I'm very very relaxed very chilled out I'm in two minds at the point where that actually worked or not this there's something in my head sir now I'm gonna go for a cigarette but there's something happen on the back my head said now you don't you don't need to go procedure it what's the point it was good that this was I think it's definitely worth it if he can save me 250 grid I was so thankful benjamin believes johns need to buy attention through his cars and his aversion to the festive season are rooted in the things he'll act as a child to help him understand this he wants to stage an alternative Christmas but rather than socks and DVDs his presence come with a very different message now what I'm saying is that this is what you need more of at Christmas and I think it's also what has undermined something India that's left you vulnerable to this spending okay should we see what it is okay it's your president he's gonna open it naturally I wasn't that interesting what does naturally mean to you being looked after I'm being careful mm-hmm in what way you know just food on the table roof over the head and nurturing love care affection but don't you think you'd be better off if you had more nurturing doesn't worry you know I've been to see what the second one says so far John's not overly impressed with his presence freezer talk what do you make of that [Laughter] maybe don't feel free to talk about it I don't know it's because you don't feel free to so likewise thing like that because you don't talk you know I think when you want to talk about yourself the first thing that happens is you start think about how other people will react if they hear it or if you'll upset someone or if it's okay to bring that up so on and so inside of yourself you're constantly censoring yourself which means you're not free to talk see you're thinking right now you're not free to talk okay you're not gonna tell me one no box number three is praise something John feels he has enough of but by box for Benjamin starts to hit home and for the first time John begins to look within himself I think maybe you act appropriately among everyone yeah which means that in a way the true you the real you please never come out it never come out oh and that is a symptom of not being confident enough in your true core self to allow that person to come forward and let people like you or not know I know I know I'm not confident okay I think the confidence it's been put down to being to moralize as a kid by others other kids yeah okay so other kids so when we went through the bit and said I wanted to change my face won't change my name I believed that to be my lack of confidence okay what do you think another box I think we're it's all about I think you've got to write they look to be wrong I should go for the decide oh yeah if you like it's like the big Christmas present understanding understanding did you get enough understanding in your life no always no no to the point or anything to be fair it's quite hard for you to understand yourself sometimes now clear about myself there you go the reality is that there are two things really that make up a person's emotional health one is what happens to them and the other is how they deal with it I think in the old case I don't feel that you feel you've been really understood and I don't think you feel you've been really understood by me but I think I haven't given you everything that you needed exactly I think that's become your strategy okay is to not give someone what they need to be close to you and to understand you because you're so pissed off that you haven't been understood in the first place so it's your revenge but it's actually not harming anyone but you know and that's why Christmas sucks because all those things that happened and everything that came before just left he was known to understand him Benjamin's probing proves too much and John needs time out when he finally comes back he's ready to admit he needs help oh right the reason I want to come back is because okay you can identifies but how can you rectify them okay well it's a very good question and I you know I think no one can understand you including yourself if you don't begin to open up and talk about who you are who you really are oh and they'll take a while to find out I think you made a huge step forward today I need to find out who I am you good I think John found that really difficult it's not easy to open up to a stranger and I think for a young man it's particularly unusual and disconcerting more than that I think John has stuff to say that's not being said and I'm worried that if if he doesn't bring it to me if I don't really get to know what's really wrong with him and how can I start thinking about what he needs to put was wrong with him right [Music] concerned about John's emotional state Benjamin calls Jay for an update on the financial side of things he seems to be quite happy with his new budget and for the time being he's sticking to it he's wanted to give up smoking so went to the hypnotherapist and so far so good no cigarettes so he knows that that's extra money for him to play with well I'm really worried about how the breakup with Emma is going to affect him that this is gonna be the cause of a major relapse and what I'm worried about is he's missing Emma he's maybe not opening up with you about that and guess what's going to happen suddenly he's gonna buy another car and off he goes again I think that you know I spotted a lot of places where he needed support but he won't really go there and admit it so you know maybe I just have to accept that here's a young man that he can't deal directly with some things have to find a way to work with him indirectly he may be in an area that's more in his comfort zone I mean the car thing is a huge thing for him it's like not only is it his hobby but it's his life and I think it is quite hard for him to think about how is not would be if he didn't have the card so what I'm gonna try and do is think of something where I can give him the buzz to do with cars but not to do with buying another one and shelling out loads of money and going down that route but before they do any more work they decide he needs to get through Christmas first the new year dawns with a few days off John's had a time to reflect on his situation I had a good Christmas it was it was nice and relaxing I think throughout the whole of the period I was constantly thinking about you know our Christmas chat and the boxes and those words that we use and things like that and it kind of it did bringing you know I did it did get brought up here my so train of thought every now and then and I think that's probably what made me relax more because I was sort of we discussed so much and we discussed you know the problems that I've faced over that sort of the the festive period and it kind of numbed it down a bit and he's also feeling the benefits of Jays strategies the quitting smoking is brilliant I feel a lot better for myself you know healthier obviously saving me quite a lot of money which is noticeable really nice because I don't if I haven't cashed in I don't I don't see like these five pound fifty or whatever four cigarettes on my card though I'm spending every now and then every day practically wasn't it so but yeah I'm glad that's gone [Music] with John refreshed and upbeat Jay decides to tackle his biggest financial headache his driving passion for cars she's found a way to give him the buzz of pushing pedal to the metal without ruining his credit rating welcome to the classic car club Wow look at this [Music] do you have it here yes it's like you know toy shop one of the reasons I brought you here today was to talk to you about long-term because obviously I know we've done quite a lot of work on you sort of finishing up the Stevo and that sort of chapter ending and you getting out of trouble but what my worry is is that sooner or later you might get a bit bored you get one of your extra bonuses at work and you suddenly think oh god what am I going to do with this money and before you know where you are you bought another one and you're down this route again as director James Evans explains the club gives its members the chance to drive a range of high-performance cars at a fraction of the cost of running them it's very simple you basically pay an annual membership fee you pay a one-off joining fee as well and in total that's about four thousand pounds for that you get a block of points each time you use a car you use something that point and points up but on our for each members get you know in excess of 40 days driving but the key thing for us is that the prices account so you paid your money that's it your insurance maintenance storage everything's included joining a club like this would give John all the pleasure but a lot less financial pain of driving a very sexy car how would you feel if you were driving up to one of the shows in one of these be feeling pretty flash it could be quite nice in all the people in there fiestas and things like that and then you're all up in a Maserati you know I know for you from your perspective it's about your personality it's about the cars that are sexy for you I believe that if I turned up in something like Ferrari wherever to one of your amazing meats and you've got these stunning cars there you know they are stunning but you turn up in a beautiful classic Ferrari you're gonna get I think you're actually gonna get more legs everyone's gonna go wow he's a cool guy because he he's not trying too hard building a steel out it's all about your own identity in the car that's something like one of these it's yeah there's so few of them on the road is your identity anyway I think so if you had to choose one of these to go out for in the weekend which one would you choose probably have to choose this one the Maserati being our sexy number any chance you can do a trade it knows mr - well that's okay well I like to know you got to bring it in we'll have a look at it yeah you never know [Music] he might not be trading in his mr2 for the Maserati but he's been inspired to take an equally radical step I need to sell their motto it's costing far too much to keep most apartments to run off CJ's identified them you know spending at least 200 quid a month on it and I'm just not driving as much as I used to anymore unfortunately she's got to go four weeks ago car fanatic John was on the road to financial ruin his lads lifestyle kept him constantly overdrawn but his quest to create a customized show car had run up a seventeen thousand pound debt having been shown the true extent of his spending expected a lot more our expert set out to get him back on the straight and narrow Jay focused on practical ways to cut down on his spending nothing to be alarmed about all you've got to do is sit calmly and listen to a hypnotherapist Benjamin opened up some old emotional wounds though is to think to myself oh it would be nice to have a different faces higher mm-hmm you just wanted to be someone else yeah which proved to be difficult medicine for John to take all those things that happened and everything that came before just left you with no one to understand him [Music] with John's financial journey almost complete Benjamin wants one final stab at helping him face up to the emotional baggage that's holding him back I do think it's been really tough a job to open up it's really tough for him to even think about the purse let alone talk about it so today I'm going to use a visualization technique to make what he's talked about seem a little bit more real to him and to get him to express it in a different way now welcome to the wall what do you think you could possibly represent not okay well not to be too cheesy about it but these for me are your mental blocks okay things that are stopping you moving on in life okay can you give me an example a school yeah school that was a big one wasn't it yeah these are spray paints what I want you to do is I want you to just decorate your Lord and we're gonna make it into something that represents everything that's held you back in your life you said the first thing for you is school now can you think of anything to put on this wall that represents school for you that's neither Whitgift rugby top all right [Music] having resisted Benjamin's Christmas therapy John is surprisingly enthusiastic about painting his wall if it's a player services although the exercise quickly unlocked some very personal and painful memories and highlights John's feelings about his own identity yeah I'm gonna put something in the hole which i think is a big moment question one who are you if you're not steel Oh Jung you know if the car isn't your face what is your face anything else you'll to put out there I've been I watch more like confidence on there okay you want to write confidence yeah what's another word for lacking confidence fear fear so John come and talk me through what all these things on this will really mean to you I also got there it's the top four secondary school their attempt at a cap it's like the cap we swear at junior school yeah got the cool crowd and means Billy no-mates obviously a big one for me of their gravestone for Japan stress stressed you let's go ahead exploding with anxiety I think fears what the key word for me as well and I'll see who the hell am I what I think this is the stuff that's really been holding you back in life it's like a background feeling you've always had it it's always been there probably ever since you first went to school so you don't notice anymore but you do notice when it's gone and I think when you feel compulsively drawn to buying stuff expressing yourself building up your car which is your new face and all this other bad stuffs gone away so what you've got to remember and focus on is when you feel like spending it's all that other stuff that you're spending to avoid instead of avoiding it like that what you can do just think that there are other ways that you can get through these mental blocks now John has identified the things that are holding him back there's one very real and physical way to break through his personal barriers so you're basically gonna switch through your mental blocks and out into the light there's the bright new food into the new food so fire up your engines okay thank you [Music] [Music] yeah they're better than there's been cast into the wind I have they got not for six okay well now you're on an adrenaline high yeah it's strapped in to rally car you've got a top instructor next year I thought it might be tools to let you just have a bit of fun there and all that so you guys go off do a few things that you do and I want you to just enjoy the moment okay thank you for me the image of the day will always be from where I was standing just watching him drive through that wall the whole thing just exploded in front of my eyes and all those images were just shattered as John disappeared out into the light and I think that's a great memory for him to take forward when he thinks about spending money when he thinks about dealing with his worries he knows that he's not alone and he can take care of things his friends are with him and there is another way to go it doesn't just have to be done with his credit card [Music] two months ago Jonathan Paul began the painful task of getting himself off the road to financial ruin it's no time for his final reckoning with Benjamin and Jay when you first said you were gonna do this did you think it was gonna be this difficult no no not oh not in terms of sort of see the mental side that the Benjamin's put me through now that it's all done and dusted how do you feel that him back on the psychological process it was difficult it was difficult of see the Christmas treatment I think it made me really really think a lot and obviously I think with you saying with the like some of the key words you know one in particular that sticks in my mind I want to know if you think what that word is understanding no read at all yeah yeah yeah obviously the understanding one tipped me over the edge though the free to talk once I'm thinking about a lot more thinking about the boxes I thought that was quite an upbeat day do you think that driving that car through those boxes has enabled you to put some of those issues maybe in perspective or even behind you potentially I think as you know if I had come across to think about those kind of issues it it will bring up that memory and it will just sort of like disperse it on that aspect the question might still always in my head play of who are you we won't know until you talk enough to find out sure so talking now about the financial side of everything this has been a good thing for you hasn't it realizing just how much buying all the cars was taking out of your account yes especially when I saw the you know the the figure when we did the shot tactics what do you think now when you look back at the total and all that money that you spent on the cars an explicit it really wasn't I hope so now I'm able to look at where my money's got a lot more I've I'm addicted to sort of checking my net West online banking and things like that and now I've set up savings account I've always I've already managed to put that firing to quit away that is often the case that people who've been the biggest spenders can become the best savers because you become obsessed because also you've got the same thing then you gotta normally here and then I just go drag and drop going all day long it's pretty mad that's like I think about I would have spent a fiver on cigarettes today put that all there so 17,000 it's got to be paid off how long do you reckon that's going to take what's your plan my ideal girl was got to be gone within a year 12 months max it's pretty focus what I need today I have to ask the question what is happening with the steel a it's taking shape we'll start taking shape in the next couple of weeks so once she's done that's it no more money going on a new car no there's no more spending seriously Super Max monument on Ashoka without buying other cars another question yeah but not a shaker no I wouldn't I wouldn't go the whole hog and do it all again never again never again you only do it once it has been worth it I think it's been an eye-opener for me and I think it will make you think before I spend now I think it'll make anyone think before they pull out a credit card or a bank card again or even spend some money but yeah it's it's been interesting stressful tiring and it'll be interesting to see what happens in the future you

Channel: Only Human

Views: 22,376

Keywords: only human, only human channel, only human documentary, shopaholics, shopaholics anonymous, shopaholics bbc, shopaholics documentary, shopaholics full episode, shopaholics uk, shopping addiction debt, shopping addiction documentary, shopping addiction full episodes, shopping addiction help, shopping addiction recovery, shopping addiction true life, spendaholics, spendaholics documentary, spendaholics full episodes, spendaholics tv show, spendaholics uk, spendaholics youtube

Id: TYRemIODPLQ

Length: 56min 4sec (3364 seconds)

Published: Wed May 13 2020