I think it's safe to say at this point... We've lost the war against the Viner Invasion and they're definitely here to stay. Remember all those Vine Compilations back in 2015? Those were a warning. Now, out of the Viner Invasion, you've got your two frat douche bags: Jake and Logan Paul Their 20 minute vlogs they post each day are pretty much inescapable at this point. *excessive amounts of yelling, screaming, and smashing dishes* Logan: ARE YOU G O O D BRO Logan's "Girlfriend": yea, i'm good. *logan throws dish as hard as he can* Logan: CAUSE I DON'T THINK YOU GOOD BRO! ("humor") logan: THATS MY JOB *Logan "driving" a car terribly while passengers shouting in enjoyment* Jake: Oh, my god! Jake: Goood morning JAKE PUAAUAUAUAUAauauauauaLEeeeEErS! And also, they've dabbled with music videos shitty song: Its, lit, chris.... tmas... Lit. *gunshot of relief* Uh, this- this... This thing is shit. It's absolute trash. And it's really just, like... a human centipede of song. Just- each song... Just shitting into the next song only for that song to shit into the mouth of the following song. and that is... Miss Lele Pons. *Obnoxious dubstep and cheering* *Plastic water bottle hits Pons* *ded* Oh, my god, is she dead?! I can feel my leg... E T E R N A L D A M N A T I O N Lele Pons is an individual that believes loud = funny *bruh* in pretty much every given situation. What we've seen is... this younger generation is very lonely, very depressed, and they want to be entertained and they want, actually, hope- Lele: YOU LET G O !! *incomprehensible screaming* SOMEONE SAVE HER Actually, hope. (Irony intensifies) Her content is even more inescapable than Jake and Logan Paul's Every video she posts seems to get #1 on trending (What was your first clue sherlock?) And each one of these videos is full of incredibly unfunny humor and a total abuse of stock sound effects. Lele: "I volunteer as tribute!" *quality* *bass as girl dies* (og video, no edit) *BRUH* *More bass* *Abuse of "BRUH" sound effect.* She's more the Instagram "comedian" of YouTube. (instagram "comedy" example incoming) Thot: Babe... I want a new purse. Can I have some money? Vine Guy: No! Thot: I'll let you put it in my butt... *Stock "BANG" sound effect* *"Go get the money" song plays*
(I want to die) *Rare footage of a pyrocynical fan showing his favorite channel to his family* Something I've noticed with these videos... They either feature a total abuse of the "thud" sound effect Or *B R U H* for some reason Because that's relatable, right? The wo- the word, "bruh". red: "Oh, Hey!" lele: why are you guys here? Lele: "Aww!" *overlapping overuse of sound effect "bruh"*0 But Lele Pons goes above and beyond just poor content because... as a person, she's quite a trash human being. Take this picture, for example, where she said she was "donating her hair to charity." Well, that's quite unfortunate, Lele, because that is clearly not your hair. That is a hair extension. You can even see the ends of where you plug it on your hair. And then, she went on Twitter to say the hair couldn't be accepted because it was bleached. No, Lele. The hair couldn't be accepted because it was f**king fake. You've got people like Sam Pepper and Yousef the Rat actually giving away to charity-- Yes, it's to make them look better. But they're actually giving to charity or doing somewhat of a generous act. What you did is not generous. It was completely faked, and staged, to get impressions on your Instagram account. Now obviously that's easy for me to say, and incredibly subjective, you know, you could say that about anyone. Someone gives a million pounds to charity, "Oh, they're doing it to make them look good." But the thing is, when you go to cash in that million pounds to charity, you don't do it with fucking Monopoly money, okay? I don't know man, I-I think I'm going a bit too hard on Lele. Hey, uh, Alduin, Eater of Worlds, wh-what do you think about Lele? Now behind the scenes, Lele hasn't been a very good girl, As a matter of fact, she has tried to directly sabotage and screw over her friends. Amanda Cerny, made a video coming out and explaining, And if that wasn't compelling evidence enough that Lele Trash is a total scumfuck, here is another YouTuber coming out about meeting Lele and how disingenuous, and impersonal she was. "Moving on, I'm gonna be talking about Lele Pons and my experiences with her, because she is just a weird cookie. I went up to her and I was like 'Ooh, happy birthday!' 'Do you want to come to Cheesecake Factory with us?' and I sh*t you not, this b*tch--! she looks at me, and she's like, 'Well, you're the famous one, so you decide.' What does that even mean?! Like she's so weird! I mean, I know, she's got a weird sense of humor, ok? Cause I don't really get her style of comedy, no shade, it's just not for me. So maybe she thought that was a joke, but she didn't laugh, she just kind of, like, looked at me after and I was like, 'I'm uncomfortable, I want to go away now.' Now I can understand, to some people, this isn't exactly damning evidence about her. It's just two white girls going on, talking smack about someone and providing little to no evidence. But the thing is, you'd think that if Lele was actually being slandered, she would have publicly said something on Twitter trying to promote some backlash against these girls, but nothing. She's been completely radio-silent, which doesn't look too good when you're on the defense. *The Mexican Hat Dance, for some reason* So moving AWAY from the personal life of Lele Pons, we're now going to take our main focus back onto the amazing content that she produces. *running and dramatic music* Lele: "Look, we cant both survive this game!" "Then let's die together." Lele: "I got an idea." Hot peppers! *tempo increases* Lele: "At the count of 3 we eat them together, okay?" Guy "okay." Lele: "Uno," (1) Guy: "Two," *Facepalm* lele: What! did you not see the movie? (This genuinely hurts to listen to. I have so much anxiety right now.) *Stock Fake laughter, cheering, and clapping* *bruh* Why would eating the chili kill them? I'm pretty sure it's well known that Latino people are better with spicy food than say, white people But I don't know, I guess I'm just raci- I don't know man Lele also produced a skit on, how to deal with bullying The next zuckerberg: I'm Paco. Round: I like star wars KSI kid: What? Next Zuckerberg: Star Wars is bad, Star Trek Is awesome KSI kid: I mean I like the Notebook but no one ever really cares. Round: I like science too, science and math- Next Zuckerberg: You like science? Uh, Social Studies is WAY better, don't you agree? Everyone knows that English is a lot better than both of those. Ahaha, g-get how goofy and nerdy we are?! We like EDUCATION! *seeks death* Now it's very obvious that Lele has had some input in the script, if she didn't write it entirely herself Because, trying to portray nerdy kids, she has just failed miserably. Apparently the qualifications for being a nerd: I mean, I like "The Notebook"-- NEEEEHHHRRRRRDDD It's also nice knowing that Lele Pons handpicked these children because she believed that they had some sort of detriment. He look like Zoockerbehrg. He round He look like KSI. *obnoxious trap/dubstep mix* "I mean, well I like "The Notebook" but nobody really ever cares..." "Where's the teacher?" *Stomp* *Stomp* "Oh my god" "She's pretty" Lele Pons unironically wrote in a script that an underage boy should be flirting with her. "Hey girl, stand up." "Hello, my name is Mira and I am a boy." "I think it's about time you get out of the closet, huh?" *uncoordinated applause* actually, h o p e. So as you can see, her YouTube content is quite subpar, to say the least. Let's take a look at her Instagram page and see if the quality improves there. *amazing M E X I C A N music* *indecipherable garbage* - teach them how to do the eye thing look, *mumble, mumble* Lele: OMG look look look, wait Hannah just tought us the eye thing *mumble mumble* *screeching commences* Straight... *incomprehensible screaming* O M G IT'S STUCK *distorted Seinfeld theme and screaming* The thing that hurts me, I was scrolling through the comments, Trying to find a single sane human being, That would call Lele out, but it's just an emotion of crying emojis. *slowly dying inside* There's so fucking many of them Going through most of her instagram sketches, They have the same format, Relatable humor, Lele: So, what's your name? Kid: Prince charming *Lip smack on hand* Lele: Awwwww! Thank you! S H E 'S P R E T T Y Funny sound effect, Like we mentioned at the start of the video. Other lady: Just hooking up with this guy named whompa Lele: Aye gurl! *distorted thud* And also, really god damn loud music, to the point where you're probably slowly going to lose your hearing Because ya know, We can mask this crap video with a bunch of popular music. *really loud music* Remember at the start of the video, when I mentioned that, Jake and Logan Paul had been dabbling with music videos for a while? Lele Pons has also released a music video. *Contemplating life decisions* The video's incredibly bland I'd criticize it further, but she's not speaking English, and if I criticized someone that wasn't English, That would make me racist The thing that hurts me the most, Is that Lele has done all this scummy stuff and, low effort content And she's just killing the game at the moment, man she's doing so many numbers. But you know what you should do, Don't subscribe to Lele Pons. Subscribe to Pyrocynical. Th-the best YouTuber on the entire platform, BY FAR, the best content avai- Reporter dude: Were you the popular girl in highschool? Lele: NO! No... I was- I was But anyways, I hope you guys enjoyed er, I-I'm gonna be making a review video soon, Call it the Petscop one or the Cuphead one Its, It's gonna be good So yea, uh Fuck off But before you fuck off could you- could you like the video plz- Whitewoods - Beachwalk Amazing M E X I C A N music again
