Jeff Ross Takes Bruce Willis to the Cleaners - Roast of Bruce Willis - Uncensored

happy roasts everyone look at this beautiful crowd tonight we honor the reason the world has a Vin Diesel Bruce is a real man's man he told me numerous times not to hold back tonight it's been great getting to know you and your lovely family and I see uh I met rumor your daughter hi rumor I guess that's the name your mom gives you when she's not a hundred percent sure who your father is [Applause] get a shot of that whole table it's the beautiful circle of life Bruce your family looks like all the villains you killed off in the die hard movies what a legend Bruce Willis has been fighting terrorists since before they were Arab Bruce Willis is pro-gun Pro flag and propecia Bruce Willis you love your country so much he once said that if the people wanted it he might even run for president someday I'd make fun of you for having political aspirations but the last time I did that the actually became president all night people are saying I look like you but symbol Shepard looks like Bruce Jenner Willis [Applause] and the little rail looks like Bruce what you talking about Willis the Bruce Willis you my friend are a total original how is it possible to look like a Nazi and a Holocaust victim he look like Sir Patrick Stewart if he operated a ferris wheel how the are you a movie star you look like a bouncer at a nursing home you're like Elmer Fudd if he hunting bad scribbs instead Alaska Lee wabbits this guy Bruce Willis wants an Oscar so bad he's slowly morphing into one it's crazy you went from being Hollywood's leading man to Demi Moore looking at you and saying you know what I'd rather the dumb guy from dude where's my car but Bruce we all wish you luck with your lawsuit against the Blue Man Group [Applause] this is so much fun I mean Bruce is such a star you've been in some of the most iconic scenes in cinema history my favorite scene in Pulp Fiction when you save the guy from getting in the ass hey Dennis at that point in the movie were you like wait who's the bad guy again [Applause] of course your most recent film was a big bomb death wish what a stinker Bruce it looked like you did your own stunts and your own lighting editing and directing ooh how about a hand for tonight's host Joseph gordon-levitt JGL Joseph gordon-levitt the only three words more boring than gluten-free cracker thanks for dressing up Joseph you look like a lesbian on the way to prom [Applause] yeah Joseph started in third Rock from the Sun and Dennis Rodman smoked three rocks in front of his son yeah why not give it up for our next Secretary of State my man Dennis Rodman you think kim janghoon is a nice guy and he thinks you're Scottie Pippen my pal lil rel is here so happy for you buddy so happy Congrats on all your success and your newest film Angry Birds too good to see you're not selling out what are you playing Jim Crow [Applause] great to see Cybill Shepherd again and just like most shepherds Sybil hasn't worked much in the last two centuries Sybil had an affair with Elvis how cool man years after their affair symbol revealed that Elvis went down on you is that true yeah all right you think a hound dog would have a better sense of smell and speaking of moonlighting da Moreira had to cancel two shifts at macaroni grill to be here dahmer era is what you look like right before you say tomorrow I'm starting to juice cleanse kevin pollak I love you man but that Christopher Walken impression is so old Ashton Kutcher tried to marry it love you Kevin sit tight you're gonna be big whenever paul giamatti does Bruce yes you've accomplished so much buddy but I think it will always be your blockbuster Armageddon that serves as the greatest metaphor for your career because in the end you got destroyed by the rock us Jersey Boys are raised to have thick skin so I knew you'd be a great sport tonight and I wish you continued success good health and I can't wait to see your next project die hard six natural causes [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music]

Channel: Comedy Central

Views: 13,016,637

Rating: 4.8583145 out of 5

Keywords: Comedy Central, roast of bruce willis, bruce willis, roast of, comedy, comedians, bruce, willis, Jeff Ross, Roastmaster General, Donald Trump, Lil Rel Howery, Demi Moore, Ashton Kutcher, Death Wish, Dennis Rodman, Cybill Shepherd, Dom Irrera, Armageddon, insult comedy, insults, jokes, funny jokes, funny, funny video, comedy videos, funny clips, savage, jeff ross roasts, dennis rodman roast, edward norton roast, hollywood, elvis, die hard, burns, demi moore, demi moore roast

Id: 2nhxvoukBiM

Length: 7min 18sec (438 seconds)

Published: Mon Jul 30 2018

Reddit Comments

[u/Battlescarred98]

This was by far the least funny roast in recent memory.

[u/[deleted]]

Jeff Ross is funny but I don’t think he was at his best here. Funniest roast moment for me was when he had to save the Jersey Shore guy from total humiliation.

[u/[deleted]]

Jeff pulled off his most difficult costume yet-- he took a shower.

[u/RobbieWard123]

Shoulda got Jimmy Carr back.

[u/Dosca]

Can we just roast James Franco again

[u/losimagic]

Did Rodman need every joke explained to him?

[u/chumchees]

Joseph Gordon Levitt sighting. Where has this dude been these days.

[u/customerservice_28]

I thought Demi was pretty funny also. Bugged me that she was fucking with her outfit the whole time though.

[u/[deleted]]

Jeff saved this roast