It Came From Tumblr #66 | Binge Compilation

it's a binge with those who you're new this is basically a recap of all the episodes we did recently but the people who chose not to watch daily like you watch it in all one sitting and sometimes do their homework or study to it or relax to it or it's just because they don't have the time they do choose to do a weekly compilation No okay but can we just take a moment and think about the time my dad accidentally made a fried egg that looks exactly like Africa I'm actually the most impressed by the fact the egg also has a Madagascar Madagascar trying to deny that you might actually like a certain character it's total fabrication pure fiction not a chance wrong no no way it never happened it totally did whoa leg day bro you're an embarrassment to this whole gym it looks like a potato of four toothpicks slicing my ham okay okay cuddle bath to give death chin screeches and kisses capable think you human however they may or you burn love ropes someone reading my writing wow that's a great story me sticking my hands in the bottles Thanks it has pockets yeah you emo [ __ ] okay I'm fine thank you for asking so recently there has been a darkness growing within me I just learned that a Japanese term for seahorse is taught to notice ego and it literally means dragons illegitimate child well I could him he's a bastard whoa who do we fight anyone not wearing a primary color this is my favorite line in the show oh my god by tears the three stages of a Kathy on the tiny little all mouth the sticky the tongue out real far and stage 5 blame love writing stories and making a half slice of life plot half important plot stuff thing one minute it's like lake character's crush a girl it does bill it tell her then the next is like hey bruh you know would be pretty cool if we killed god yes the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse I think you mean oh yes the four human emotions secondhand and embarrassment frustration gay and sadness identify with all four I guess that means I am a Homestuck how many ask you get in a day puckett show depends on how active I am but usually forty to fifty smelly smelly you are you've always been you always will be and that's okay it's a nice smell good boy aliens being confused by how humans deal with sent human oh I'm gonna have to watch this blankie to get rid of that new smell okay wash blanket get rid of weird smell gotta love that new car smell okay there's two cause it's a different story I guess one out Oh books smells so good I'm supposed to write here I love the new book smell why are you like this are there any book series that an author has finished and then continued again down the line done a spin-off that have actually been good trying to think of Annie were the new additions to the series were not slow garbage so Percy and two more Pierce of the most suggestive examples here and shout out to the person who suggested the New Testament good job classy parents picking their child's name yeah I like the way it sounds sure Ryder's picking the character's name Ronald how old are they active or passive blood tight country of origin is a family name what does the name mean what position was the planet to the stars of the exact moment of their birth is the nerd alternatively writer looks around room spots candle ice on their table now the great king licen ruler of the nation of table area I'm not religious and I got bored with the default oh my god and Jesus Christ exponents so now when I examine I just used the names of my favorite historical figures for example suffering Tsavo my parents are religious so I'm not allowed to say those and I'm also not allowed to curse so my three replacement words and phrases are shiz Nuggets curses and by the news of baori beep ensign by the knees of berry B Benson is technically in violation of the Eighth Amendment to the US Constitution but how though we're Birds cruel and unusual punishment and the winner of the bake-off is 9 dismembered bodies this is like cards against humanity have [ __ ] this happen you've heard of press f to pay respects now get ready for please press o to spend time with the boys you know I never seen a prompt in a video game that asked so politely you know what I think I will press o to spend time with the boys thank you very much video game where would we be as a society without gay podcasts nowhere that's what if you weren't charge of Brazil what would be your policies everybody has to come to Brazil and what if I don't it's too late he's Brazilian now not that I don't love the cursed bio facts but do you have any blessed by effects yes ah do hyenas can loaf like house cats oh ok goat I got a job for you make me anxious about furries I mean not to offend furries mostly Allah nice ok so imagine five nights at Freddy's one of the animatronics is just a person dropping in from a furry convention oh so this is how I found out the five nights at Freddy's animatronics contained the corpses of murdered children huh you just you're all really just out there playing a game that's that's the Canon lore I can't duh you all finally broke me holy [ __ ] finesse how the did you break goat if you read something in PMC Moore's voice it becomes like ten times funnier I've been doing this all day my lab gave me a banana did you see that cow you're like scarecrows you know the worst part is is I hear it and I know which voice is to use an idea you're fighting over the power detail Zuko discourse but let me introduce you to the cursed concept of pigtail Zuko Oh hates hate this today I learned that van Halen have that rider in their contract about a bowl of M&Ms with all the brown ones removed in order to know at a glance if the promoter read the entire contract and the reason they do that is because they once had a stage collapse because a promoter hadn't read the proper way to set up all the specific technical stuff so if the band goes in the dressing room or catering and sees brown M&Ms they know they have to double-check the stage set up for safety yo now that's rock and roll right day okay someone who has never watched JoJo's Bizarre Adventure explain this I love you Sara Lee no I'm so cute also I kind of turned it to a domotic rock star hole with people hug me but that's okay because we mean it's not that far from what might actually be the truth your bellybutton is just your old mouth I was having a good day we were all having a good day 99% of the time I see a cat I just have to like drop whatever the hell I'm doing it acknowledged that there's a cat and say hi to the cat and walk up to the cat pet the kid yeah tell you this but uh that's a big step energy you got right there don't ever call me Opie you will address me by my full name no yes Oh bird poo Bert when you straight friend about to do something stupid Hatter adults hetero dope hello dope dope book though oh I had a dream last night that Mothman was getting sued by the state of West Virginia for accidentally breaking light post and he hired me as his lawyer and in court I was like now my client is joy moths so you care to blame him for loving lights and halfway through my speech I turned to address Mothman and saw he was bumping into courtroom lights and they broke and caused a power outage happy Pride Month - my favorite piece of official sonic the hedghog art if you're homophobic you don't understand what Sonic is all about it's about friendship and justice and being free to be yourself open your heart live and learn that's what Sonic the Hedgehog is about today's headlines respond to your text I get overwhelmed by simple tasks it's okay me constantly my college doesn't allow us to carry pepper spray for self-defense because they claim it's a weapon and it is but I'm at a culinary school every single student is carrying several hundred dollars worth of knives around with them and they teach classes on how to break down whole animals easily with said knives but no pepper spray because no no no no way that's too dangerous also I can't attest to this fact as a former culinary student those knives are so sharp you don't actually feel when they cut you because pain is felt on rough edges and not extremely sharp edges so yeah [ __ ] pepper spray is bad right Oh have you no I am hot hard to love obnoxious and terrible when I was in preschool there was this really weird system of timeout where they put you in this giant plastic bucket sort of like this one and the rule was you couldn't leave the bucket for 10 minutes in case you didn't know I was what the teachers referred to as a difficult child which is code for walking entity of sass so I was in this timeout bucket quarter breath once they put me in the bucket for 30 minutes and I thought that was incredibly unfair so I grab the handles and shifted my body repeatedly until the bucket and I were out of the classroom and the hallway and through the front door they found me in the parking lot scooting to freedom in the timeout buckets my teachers were furious and I said hey I never left the bucket so they called my mom and told her what I did and she just said well he never left the bucket me brewing some loose-leaf tea the part of my brain that is point zero zero one second away from going completely feral he believes eat the wet leaves don't ask do it some edgy loner character at a TV show do you know do you know what it's like to be afraid of yourself me thinking about that time a an entire family sized bag of Doritos and one evening God dude I sure do you're one of mental illness versus you're ten and I'm gonna tell you guys that you're 20 y'all basically just start making fun of your mental illness like anxiety would be like man I don't want to get out of bed today and you'll just leave them over like no worries are you bad today no get the [ __ ] out of bed [ __ ] we got [ __ ] to do the year is 2023 Marie Kondo holds Jeff Bezos by the skin on the back of his neck in front of a public gathering does this spark joy she shouts at the restless audience they boo in response she snaps his spine like a point five millimeter mechanical pencil led and throws his lifeless corpse into the crowd they cheer in response please tell me this is our time line please please please give this to me I introduced you to the concept of Schrodinger's teenager a person between the ages of 13 and 18 is simultaneously just a child and also a grown adults depending on how mad an adult is at them why is this true all right so out of curiosity how do we activate Yellowstone boy Yellowstone do you mean the supervolcano located under Yellowstone National Park that has a theoretical ability to super erupt and destroy the majority of animal and plant life as we know it yes how do we activate it okay first you need a paperclip today's headline nearly a dozen earth shake near Yellowstone National Park in 24 hours congratulations goat you did it what what I posted this 30 minutes ago as a shim post what the fort deserve shall I compare thee to a summers day cuz thou hast no class the worst part about parallel parking is the witnesses you know there's no witnesses if you're bad enough at parallel parking if you catch my drift wink wink saying it from my jaws oh please fire me a lady came in screaming and ranting how he wrote an obscene insult on her sandwich turns out she ordered a BLT with cheese and we wrote BLT + CH on it it took me and the manager 15 minutes just to calm her down enough to even listen to us yeah sounds like she was a real BLT with Cheers using that my favorite thing about Fran writers as they see unfulfilled potential and decide ok guess I'll do it myself case in point must you people siphon away every little pleasure I have left in France they say MDR instead of lol and that roughly translates to death by laughter so basically instead of laughing really loudly like we do the French laughed so hard that they died French slang is frickin metal ah those moments when straight people assume you're one of them and you feel like a gays secret agent let's be an Amish by spy it's ace case secret agent man how do you politely tell someone you want to hit them with a brick one which is to acquaint to your facial features with a fundamental item used in building walls repeatedly that was the most beautiful thing I've ever read what I'm saying is is that bisexuals pansexuals and asexuals should all join together so we could be in the fictitious trifecta enough people will say that we're not real and we'll all converge together in a massive fierce mass only spoke enough in myth don't come near us or you two will cease to exist so what you're saying is the queer Triforce can include a romantics now it has become the Triforce of fabulousness pucky are you okay mentally physically monetarily no yet I thrive anyways I am just angry you sound like my polish friend milk they made people condiments over there milk is not a condiment oh and what do you put on your milk burger then guys I tell you this but holy [ __ ] that's a real thing what the [ __ ] is that Oh Pookie you have made curse commentary for so long that now it has become reality see my next million-dollar idea reluctant exercise videos with people who aren't perky just5more ah no I kinda want to die right now tooth let's just power through it okay New York pose it's gonna egg like a bastard until your hamstrings release I'm not gonna lie stretch it a little deeper it's okay to go [ __ ] at this point I won't tell anyone um yes yes give me I have done it I have 3d printed out candy excuse me it has begun soon we'll be able to illegally download food our [ __ ] one of you actually this becomes the next Willy Wonka with the [ __ ] weird shapes and everything somebody make everlasting gobstoppers right now like how they're shaped in the movie do it go down please please I need money to eat all right how we concept a fairy tale where the wicked step parent who is of course also some sort of warlock transforms the princess into a swan as one does kind of in the rules but rather than running off to mope around in a lake and be beautifully tragic the princess decides to stick around the palace and cause problems on purpose so I see being transformed into a swan the most vicious creature in the lake allowed her to access her inner diva in a way that was completely foreign to her as a sweet nature child and from that day forward everyone in a three country radius was [ __ ] terrified of anything with wings it is a lovely day in the palace and you are horrible Swan thirteen and sixteen year olds nowadays don't have a gray point they'll say something like racial issues prevail because the heads of the capitalist system are benefited by it and then three seconds later tweet something like Bob the Builder owns my Ubu is : three without batting an eye this is the true Jersey experience once in my sixth hour we were talking about 911 and I announced very loudly more people died in Hurricane Maria than a 911 but nobody really cares because you can't use hurricanes to justify imperialism and then not even five seconds later I said see how my beets the worlds in good hands I think in my opinion all right so we've talked about it before Cobie is for accuracy and precision and heat is for power in distance so now we must complete the trait system I give you 20 20 DND Kobe dexterity heat strength oof Constitution T intelligence yellow wisdom and wig charisma today I learned a lightning strike can strip the bark off a tree completely when the lightning hits it super heats the water under the bark creating nearly instantaneous steam pressure which blows all the bark off yo that's reason out dead I can't believe God circumcised the street I can't believe you made me read that with my own two eyes what do you mean this is a cake for somebody's 50th birthday oh oh they're five never mind actually it's for someone's eight hundred and fiftieth birthday actually it's lighting in spider-man's 50th wedding anniversary um actually it's lighting and Spidey's eight hundred and fiftieth wedding anniversary thank you yeah we vibin today how much walking does she have to do to get them tree trunk fess oh joy is daily stroll of walking on her enemies skulls and graves prepare for steppin so here's a story a couple years ago one night I was about to propose to my girlfriend when my roommate Joseph barged into the room out of nowhere tripped and fell over breaking glass table with his face totally removed the mood now I didn't know Joseph that well don't even remember where he was from well let's say I put my plans on hold to help him through his injuries Joseph had gotten big glass shard in his eye making him completely blind in that eye he was walking around with one of them cotton pads on his eye for a couple months then suddenly he disappeared along with my girlfriend apparently they bonded during the time after his injuries and eloped together leaving me behind without as much as a note I tried to track him down but I never could in conclusion they had been for cotton-eye Joe and have been married a long time ago where did you come from where did you go where did you come from [ __ ] night oh how dare you make me read that with my dojo ah welcome to Lena Tumblr posts come sit down you know his ice a bedroom but his hands say a hospital are you ready for my favorite fact if you leave a hamster wheel out in the forest while the mice will come and run on it that is my favorite fact I have one as well Bobcats and Lynx will sit in cardboard boxes abandoned in the middle of the forest I asked the Lynx researcher who told me this why and he said cats man and Shrugged love it Madusa trying to turn you to stone but you accidentally call her Melissa when you first walked in and now you're too embarrassed to look at her it's all right she keeps saying I get it all the time but you still won't look you don't even remember this stone thing until later yeah I am mad about the idea of money being exchanged for goods and services first of all explain to me what makes them goods instead of Bad's okay first off from screaming because I don't know Volpe noses but this is a real in economics that we talked about and draw models of a bad is a commodity that the consumer doesn't like money can be exchanged for beds and dis services my dad yelled Hennessy come to a line of coke with me so I went to the kitchen and he set this up oh my [ __ ] god this makes it sound like you were totally up for doing a line of actual coke with your father internal bleeding you say whoa this make a first way to incision doctor would Georgia him quick hand me the defibrillator please please I beg you just turn off my [ __ ] let's support why divide people by unravel things when you could divide them by whether their word for cotton candy is valid or nots American English cotton candy good British English fairy floss not valid Spanish and German sugar cotton very good and the French absolutely not valid I'm sorry the French caller what hail mobile hi mobo kenya can you leave you've heard of Slenderman now get ready for Slenderman sassy gay brother trend Ehrman trendy Minh we'll just sit here silently judging your fashion sense those Crocs not on my water bridge George Washington died in 1799 25 years before the first dinosaur was classified so therefore George Washington never knew about dinosaurs Hayes anyone having one pick from 5:30 to 7:00 we're closet as gay for 20 gay and heiress was Cool Ranch Coolidge there it is all lesbians are [ __ ] beautiful unless they prefer handsome in that case they're [ __ ] handsome ye Sonic sneak sign shoot the hog he sees I'll give you a Soviet soldier training his backflip tomahawk throw ah what hey Bert have you seen my wastepaper basket ask me that again and look into my nice sometimes I'm Ernie and sometimes I'm Bert oh god no no no no I know what jackals the moon monkey as a follower oh god this is no exaggeration this is the scariest thing I've ever seen in my [ __ ] life he has no commands cannot be dismissed and it's just got a hundred times worse he has no commands he can't be dismissed this stuffed monkey is [ __ ] pissed is this a joke around golden yellow crypto crystalline fluoride surround by quartz crystal points Jamaica

Channel: P.M. Seymour

Views: 552,535

Rating: 4.9597044 out of 5

Keywords: voice, audio, P.M. Seymour, comedy, reading, discord, twitter, tumblr, social media, posts, reading posts, late night blogging, blogging, editing, not for kids

Id: d8RxHaVyXaU

Length: 24min 46sec (1486 seconds)

Published: Thu Jun 11 2020