I was sponsored to die

hey there friends how's it going my name is kevin just die already it's today's sponsor super excited to be playing i played the demo before but now the full game is out on epic games steam you got xbox one ps4 nintendo switch and it's cross play on all platforms there's a link in the description you're going to check it out but let's dive right in ah boomer begun okay sorry i'll leave oh no i should i shouldn't i'm sponsored i should i should go through with this i think i want to be wally he looks like an old man with attitude i mean i'm kind of also scared of him i'm just surrendering myself to wally oh i know that look wally me and wally relate to each other a lot actually oh no not the way he gets out of bed though i do not jump out of bed like that i've lost an arm simply opening the cupboard what happened all right well i have my arm back now it's just one really long arm though instead of having two jesus this is an aggressive retirement home it's forced retirement i'm locked in here is this a retirement home or a prison i caught myself in a bear trap really i have one good arm and i catch it in a [ __ ] bear trap ow okay there goes my leg i haven't even left the room yet and i've the half my limbs well i was running around like a headless chicken anyway so i guess it doesn't matter okay this is all from attempting to open the fridge oh look at that it was all a bad dream ignore all the blood that was from another old man that was the previous resident my twin i'm wally and he was willy yeah i was trying to cook willy he wanted it to be cooked and eaten that was his dream what is wrong with this fridge cheese what the hell now wally's dead now the triplets gonna have to come out there we go he does not care about his two brothers wait can i grab on to this fan i can i don't know if it's a good idea but i can oh my god he's rolling around he's so happy so much energy from a man of his age all right let's look for something sharp to get out of here i don't know if i should be looking for sharp things though when i literally decapitated myself on the fridge it seems like there should be more child proofing in here i found a key can we use that here perfect we're out oh my god i cannot resist get in there yeah there we go i fed the fish see old people are not useless we can do loads of things i am looking after the fish oh well at least they the wet floor sign down that is kind of my fault let me just roll over to the other door with this sharp axe there we go we're through i want to get out of this i can't resist it every chance say wait i'm fine what in that case i'm taking the fish out of the water there we go there we go and drop there you go i freed the fish how am i gonna free myself there we go i got out come with me this fish needs to learn you gotta kill or be killed when it comes to me like the other fish knew what to do get out of my way old man that'll teach you for being old wait no hold on sorry for hitting you with a fish i need to talk to you congratulations one of you died look upstairs there's two more oh jesus christ there's about to be another either you or me i'm going to throw an old person at her that'll sure oh god damn it stop hitting me i'm old i'm taunting all the old people in an attempt to get thrown out of this care center i don't know if you call a care center i don't see any care in sight i'm popping the balloons i'm trying to just ruin this party i've escalated to just straight-up murder now i'm opening the present why was there one of just bees all right yes i'm getting kicked out and i'm also dead oh my god she's swelling up jesus look at her i got kicked out but i'm dead they kicked me out i was supposed to be a whole person there but i think i'm just a butt you died yep all right respawn there we go i was in the trash all along bucket list picked up oh my god i need to act on my bucket list look at this wonderful city to explore wait is that a person flying through it's probably a bird yeah i'm old i've bad eyesight you know that's probably it all right i gotta eat 50 things all right that's a weird thing to have on the bucket list but okay it's 470 meters or more probably even more weird i mean that's a way to end your bucket list slip get shocked by water taunt citizens bleed a certain amount look swole okay you know what i think i'll just start quick firing off a few of these i gotta find the tallest building to jump from oh watch out watch out watch out i'm rolling over here ooh steamroller this isn't on the bucket list but i'm wondering is it on theirs i want to do a good deed come get me there we go it's just like looney tunes life goal complete all right maybe it was my goal maybe it was a selfish act after all oh i respawned and i found another one wait i respawned again hold on but i found another one i can go smash people yeah all of a sudden it's my life goal to run people over in this thing the hell is going on in there i'm really trying to kill these millennials who are just going for a few coffees all right i think i did my job why is there an old person signed does that mean i should go in i'm oh get your legs off the counter dude not only is it rude i think it's glitching out anyway i'm going into the ventilation system because i'm kind of suss go on roll in dude come on you roll into the vent all right i guess that's just an out vent not an invent oh my god dude i think you might have had one or two many coffees has someone ordered me on amazon should i go in here this poor old dude he's getting mangled i need to stop getting distracted oh what's this hold on pour the potty into the landmines why are there landmines there we go whoever's in there is now dead fantastic work but as i was saying i need to stop getting distracted i want to go somewhere really tall and jump off great i have to climb a [ __ ] ladder like i get it there's no ramp or anything even though i'm elderly a ramp would be nice but i understand that that's not doable but could we at least get some stairs maybe an escalator why did i complain it was a ladder and now it's just parkour anything to complete my life goal of dropping 70 meters i feel like this was actually a challenge to get that token and i'm just going up there to try and jump off i don't think i'm doing this right how the hell oh really i gotta grab onto that [ __ ] bar why do games set the bar so high these days yes okay now can i how do i do this ah how do i get up there i fell off okay there has got to be an easier building to scale there's no way that's the only way i can jump off yeah flex those muscles honestly you deserve it you did great up there i got to be honest with you i don't think i could do that and you got to be what like 94. watch now he's just like 27 he just spent too long in the tanning salon wait what what what did i do what okay oh jesus i stole their little moped really fast how do i no okay there we go i'm moving i was just honking instead of moving oh great i'm gonna be one of those old people that merged onto the wrong side of the highway back it's reminding me of the chaos mod where i'm just spinning in circles like a beyblade beeping does nothing they don't pay attention all right that's enough blood on the highway i think wait i died now god i thought i was dead ages ago how's my bucket list looking get hit by a car oh it's something i've a lot of experience in both in game and in real life come here oh there we go did i get it no what but i'm an expert in that field um all right at least i know it's not just me that's getting tortured here in the city what's this place close due to malpractice oh free samples epic free needles everyone come back why are you panicking free needles hey you there you go i hope that uh i was gonna say you wake up big and strong but i just hope you wake up i just jumped up and stole someone's plan from their balcony that was a lot easier to get up on this building rather than the building next to it where i tried to core up do you think this is 70 meters oh well now i kind of got to do it anyway because there's trampolines there so i got oh no i'm not going to make it ow i didn't get the goal and i missed the trampoline oh i got the jaywalker thing okay i guess you can't technically jaywalk on the freeway can you you're just an absolute lunatic running out into traffic and hoping to die i got stuck in the power lines and then eat it into someone's garden hello okay that was probably my fault for getting too close but anyway i'll be on my way sorry for bothering you i'm gonna be a hot tub streamer now i won't even wear a top you can just see my bone and no problem at all what are you guys doing oh grenades gas oh okay i gotta respawn and get involved in this water balloon fight with those two kids wait what is this no i'm just on my way to like a water balloon fight what the hell is going on here some sort of dojo okay you know what i'll come back here when i've done my training in the water balloon fight first i didn't realize what i was getting myself into um okay is this where the water balloon fight was yeah this is it i respawned by accident oh wait wait hold on i was right next to where i spawn anyway okay my bad let me hook up the power to their house again i know someone's like actually working on it at the moment but still someone probably wants to use the internet in there there we go murder and the wi-fi is back on what a day jesus and they say old people are bad at driving how'd you end up in here okay if i know this game and i feel like i do this should blast me into the air and i should get over into the garden yes i broke many bones doing it but it worked what the hell did i just walk through is that a cactus or something where did all these spikes come from i killed myself with the gas thing instead of actually this is just an awful day where did the bees come from there we go i'll just pull the kid away and drown him in this paddling pool there we go so the grenades are gone but at least there was other ways of killing a child in the garden all right now i can drop the lifeless corpse great great job in the garden today i'll feed the fishies i love being fish food look how indifferent he looks oh brilliant okay let me go to that zen garden and make it not so zen wait what are you doing with me why are you throwing me away the kid is throwing garbage everywhere i killed one kid and suddenly i'm the bad guy oh sorry i meant to grab something off the shelf but i guess i'm buying you come with me take the lie down here oh okay somebody tells me this isn't gonna relax you i i want to let you go but i can't there's something inside me that just won't let me oh treasure if i can get up there there's a plank and everything i could jump down and smash through the grade using my body mass you take my hand sunny boy i need help he has no interest whatsoever damn it respect your elders grab me okay i managed to stand on top of the ladder jump across [ __ ] sake i am actually going to sue the city over this like how can i jump off the tallest building in the city if they don't make it accessible to the elderly yes i'm so glad he didn't ah another ladder jesus not only can he climb the ladder he's doing like 360s and everything he's making it way harder than it needs to be wait what there was stairs coming across for god's sake i could have just walked up this fair well you know what now when i reach the top there will be more of a sense of pride and accomplishment i'm lying i'll just be more frustrated is that it oh i thought it was a banana peel but it's actually it's a gun oh maybe i can save that old dude who's just flying around on that balloon oh it shoots bananas i should have seen that coming well i didn't think it would instantly explode from me [ __ ] standing on it if i just stay here do you think my bones will regrow like a starfish i mean he's still making a go of it god bless him but i don't think it's possible this seems disrespectful to whatever this statue is i'm just resting on its bosom you know what let's head to the zen garden screw this building even though i really want to climb it i just don't know how karen elderly wash well i could use with a wash um i've lost control of the power wash hello yes i'll take one zen please thank you very much what what wait why are you attacking me i'm in search of zen are you supposed to be peaceful is this because i sat on that shrine earlier and nuzzled in his bosom old dude one of us one of us wait why have you got that shotgun oh no get off my lawn but i'm not a child i'm also old oh no oh no oh no all right look let me run in here and get whatever this is i don't know what this is but i really want the magic orb oh my god you've got [ __ ] landmines set up and everything sweet jesus how do i get over there ow all right bob and weave that didn't work at all there's a ladder but okay i'm managing to climb it even though i only have one leg oh there's more oh god this one isn't on a slant i don't know if i can climb this one no i can't effect's sake i'm gonna have to get past him then oh wait hold on hold on can i crush him with this fridge i see i could pull on it but i have no arms hold on i'll be right back well that was fast i don't know why i thought hiding behind a piece of wood would save me it's working it's working hold on yes it missed him i'm taunting him now that's that's not gonna do anything all right can i take this orb the magic orb and leave i assume i need to take it away but come on dude hurry hurry hurry hurry hurry before he [ __ ] reloads i got your magic or herb i got your magic orb i wonder where i have to take it i have the magic arm i just don't know why i have it it was just my inner voice telling me to steal things to be honest i feel like enlightenment is just behind there even though it looks like it's just five angry people there we go i got on his roof it turns out there was a key up here which i think is for a fence over there honestly i was hoping for enlightenment at the top of there like i'm just here looking for answers for my soul also to cause a bit of a ruckus but i i want to see what i can do with that fireball hello everyone i am no i was hoping that i could say that i have touched the fireball and i'm at peace with myself we could all get along but you just have no interest anyway i stole your fez and now i'm leaving just back off all right if you come at me wait have you achieved inner enlightenment i can't kill you what the okay i'm leaving i didn't realize you were unkillable otherwise i wouldn't have started a fight with you i only start fights that i have an upper hand in no no no no no no no no this is my fire orb your one's still safe back there somewhere this is a different one i i bought it on on ebay okay there's a green orb in there there's definitely like something i have to do with these wait what the hell is this what oh i just realized you're not supposed to have legs that's what it wants it wants you to sacrifice your legs to go in the problem is i'd be losing my legs to get these orbs which i don't know what they're even for oh oh that answered that question okay well that means i'm still missing an orb okay blue orb in there we go i knew collecting these will come in handy i got life gold progressed ball fondler do we have to call it that um what's the best way of losing my legs maybe uh land mine or wait oh all right didn't come off land mine i lost one uh the other one all right fine perfect now i just gotta crawl all the way over there so this is what it feels like to be a zombie in call of duty zombies i feel much worse for like guiding them all over the map all of a sudden you can tell by the way i walk my walk i'm miserable and i wanna die please let me in i've gone through so much to get in here come on come on please god damn it wait a second do i need my knobs i think you actually just need to lose your feet oh how am i supposed to do that oh [ __ ] i just stood on a rake come on mantis i'm praying you can do this right okay now i'm just wearing bear traps and shoes now i can reset these sorry gentlemen you know it's all about pain it's like a way of peacefully protesting i don't know what i'm protesting by the way i think i'm just protesting feet what do i have to do to get in here i feel like i've gone through everything wait can i buy bear traps no it can't all right i can buy a clown nose which honestly would suit me because i feel like a [ __ ] clown right now there we go i can't earn my way in there so i'm trying to just try to just cheat my way in there i want tranquility god damn it i just don't want to earn it oh okay that worked hello everyone i'm here for my tranquility you're not gonna attack me are you all right they're just punching air for now can i steal this throw what is it oh oh no oh no my tranquility the effect's sake all right i lived somehow there's another one oh no oh buddha is me all right i found a key wait what this this is what i came here for fantastic i'm so happy all right now you worship me now the state of them yes oh no no no no i shouldn't be taunting them as buddha they don't like that but yes i continue to do it oh my god look at beyblade buddha all right folks we are gonna end it there if you enjoyed you can check out the game for yourself below as i said it's out on steam epic games xbox one ps4 nintendo switch cross platform there's a pvp mode coming out in june uh but yeah if you want to check it out link below thank you for watching and i hope to see you next time bye for now [Music]

Channel: Call Me Kevin

Views: 583,100

Rating: 4.9679971 out of 5

Keywords: Call Me Kevin, Call Me, CallMeKevin, CallMe, funny, funny moments, comedy, lets play, gameplay, gaming, just die already gameplay, just die already game, just die already funny, just die already funny moments, just die already callmekevin

Id: NYGGMWRkgnw

Length: 17min 1sec (1021 seconds)

Published: Fri Jun 04 2021

Reddit Comments

[u/[deleted]]

This is weird I was just watching his first video on this