Mark: Yeah!-- Wait whose team am I on? Wade: Alright, Mark- Mark, it's you and me. Mark: Yeah, Wade! M: How do we.. Wade: Alright buddy. Mark: ..how do we do teams? Mark: How does teams even work in this? Wade: So only one of us has to win for us both to win. Wade: We work together to help one of us empty our hand. Mark: Oh, okay! Wade: We can see each others' cards.
M: Oh, I can see your cards! Wade: Yeah! Mark: How am I supposed to be able to pay attention to that?! Wade: By looking at them. *Mark laughs* Jack: I'd say just, *Wade laughs* Jack: Play it how you always play. Mark: I don't think I can handle this, Wade! Jack: Bob? Bob? Bob: I don't have anything to play. Wade: Don't forget, zeros and sevens are on, so those change our hands. Mark: Okay. Alright. Here we go! Mark: BOINK! Jack: Ohh, shit-dog. *Mark laughs* Oh, shit, dude! Bob: Oh lord. Wade: Don't do it Bob: Hell nah. Jack: DOINK! Mark: Alright... Okay.. Bob: Oh shit son. Oh shit. Wade: YELLOW! Mark: Wade, that doesn't help me! Wade: Well, what was I supposed to do?
Mark: I don't know!
Bob: Oh, I got an idea! Mark: Ha, HAA! Mark: Eat a dick! Bob: Oh, that's not bad. Jack: Bob, you just helped him! Mark: Okay what should I do? What should I do, Wade? Wade: Uh, It's up to you man. My hand's not really helpful. Wade: You can play a seven and see what Jack's got? Mark: Nailin' it! Yep! Gonna do that! Mark: Gimme that! Bob: Uhh, doesn't really help you very much. Mark: You don't know that! Mark: OOOH! I feel so helped! Wade: HA, HAA! Wade: Your turn now. Bob: Aww.. Mark: I-I I got this one.. on lock Mark: Ha Ha! Wade: Ha Ha! My Turn! Mark: Ha ha! Jack: Good good, cause I had none. Bob: Ha ha..! Mark: Ha ha! Wade: It's going good then. Jack: HA HA! *Mark laughs* *Jack continues and Mark joins in* Wade: Look! *Jack and Mark laugh* Bob: Wow, let's not- let's not do that. Mark: Oh my.. *Jack laughs* Wade: Here have a.. four. Jack: F*ck dude. Bob: Ahh, shit snacks yo.
Jack: That's crazy shit you're playing right now. Wade: I know man, I-I live on the edge Bob: I did not see that coming, ya know... Wade: Yeah.. Jack: Okay so- Bob: Uhhh.. Wade: NEITHER DID YO MAMA Wade: *slams table* ouhhh! Bob: Yeah.. Mark: Uh-oh Bob: Yeah..
Wade: Oh god why? *Mark laughs* *Jack laughs* Bob: That's what she said when I turned it around on her like that last night Wade: Oh yeah? Well I turned it around like this! *Mark laughs* Bob: Thank you for changing the color I appreciate that immensely Jack: *laughs* All he has were reds. *Mark laughs* Bob: And actually-actually and, but like, and actually. Jack: Don't-don't do it don't- don't Bob: No, I have a strategy- I have a strategy. Bob: Wait, why did I get two cards? Wade: Because you didn't play in time. Bob: Oh, Jesus. Mark: Ha Ha... Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha.*everyone laughs* Jack: Oh! I thought we were together in this, this time! *Mark laughs* Wade: Yeah- Jack: Okay, fuck, okay, uh, okay that's cool, uh, I can be uh- Wade: Mark, I can- I can- get you a- Mark: Uh yeah, what about it? Jack: I'm gonna say a little noperino on that one! Bob: yeah that didn't work very well, did it? Mark: Yeah. Neither did THIS FOR YOU!!
Wade: *Yells Oh repeatedly while he laughs* *Wade and Mark laugh gloatingly* Wade: Oh shit Mark: Uuuhhh Mark: Oh fuck. Jack: Weeellll. Wade: Well...
Bob: Wow.
Mark: Oh fuck. Bob: You wanna—*WADE LAUGHS GLOATINGLY* Jack: We call this "Team Fun" Versus "Team....Fuck those guys" *Everyone laughs but Mark*
Mark: You could've just kept drawing Wade, you could've just kept drawing. Wade: I probably should've Mark:You could've kept drawing, buddy.
*Bob starts to laugh* Wade: Well...
Mark: We're on a teeeeaaaaam here, working together! Wade: Oh god. Mark: Alright, welp, here I go again! *Everyone laughs* Mark: There we go! *Bob and Wade Laugh*
Jack (singing): Here I go again on mah own Wade: oouuuhhh.
Bob: uhhhhh Bob: Yeah Ok
Jack: yeah, yeah. Mark: Yeah yeah ok.
Jack: Thank you for playing something this time. Bob: I'm just gonna keep getting two cards Mark: Wade don't do it. Wade don't. Wade. Mark: Don't! I got nothing. Don't. Come on, don't do it Wade.
Bob: Do it Wade! Do it!
Jack: OOOOOooooooo! There. *sighs in relief* Thank you. Wade: Yeah, you have a chance now.
*Bob laughs* Jack: No you don't. Wade: Oh. Mark. Ooohh.
Bob: HAHA! Wade: HAHA! Mark it's your turn! Mark (raging): Just stop making it my turn! IT'S THE THING I TOLD YOU NOT TO DO!
*Everyone laughs at his pain* Wade: I KNOW I'M SO SORRY! Mark: WHY DID YOU WASTE IT? *Bob and Jack laugh*
Wade (through laughter): Because I-I I saw a pi—
Mark: BECAUSE YOU SAW A PILE ON, AND YOU WERE JUST LIKE "OH! HERE'S MY CHANCE! *Bob laughs harder*
Mark: Fuck you. Jack: OOOOHHHH YEEAAAAHHH!
Wade: OOOOHHHH JEEEZ. *Laughter* Oh no! I gave you all my good cards! Bob: Welll shit. Bob: Uhh.. Wade: It's okay Mark, I gotta play it. I don't have any cards to execute it but I've gotta play it. Jack: You basically gave me the hand equivalent to gonorrhea. *mark and bob* Ugh.. Bob: Gimme that, Mark: Alright fine. Wade: Oh yeah? Well I've got a plan- I've got a plan. Mark: You take it- *giggles* you take it from me, you take it Wade. *both giggles* Bob: This is- this is all going to work out in the end I'm pretty sure. *Mark giggles* Wade: *laughs* Now Jacks probably gonna play it- Jacks gonna play it. Jack: Oh I sure do buddy. Mark: Oh, Jacks gotta play it and ah- *mumbles* Ah, well ring around the rosie for that hand *all laughs* Mark: oh boy...oh boy Bob: Ah, shit. Jack: Well I- I think I know whats going to happen when it gets to Wade so.. Bob: Well fuck. Uhh.. yeah. Jack: Bob play somethin' Mark: Bob, play somethin' Wade: Bob, play somethin' Jack: Oh what? There you go yeah, yes, yes, take Wades. *bob giggles* Wade: NOOOOOOOO! *Mark and Bob laugh* Wade: Oh god why? *all laughs* Bob: Aahhhhhhh fuck Wade: Have an 8! Jack: Okay.. I will eat your 8 with my 8. Okay.. how bout' we do this! Wade: YESSS! Mark: Yeaaaa--sss Bob: Wha-at? Wade: Mark wait, here, have some good cards. Mark: Yeeees!! Jack: Ohhhh, fuck my A. Mark: Yessss! Wade: Also, I'm sorry Mark, but Jack has a lot of cards to damage you with. Mark: Yeah, I know.. It's okay.. *giggle cries* Wade: Wait- Is it my turn? Jack: Ah, what is happening? Wade: Here, I want- I want Jacks hand back so he can't use it on you. Mark: Oh thank you I think? Wade: Yeah, you're welcome. Jack: Oh, fair enough.. Um.. I don't really know why.. Mark: Oh okay, I guess that makes sense, Fair play is fair play I suppose. Bob: I guess. Jack: Bob, you know what to do. Bob: Yeah.. Jack: Oh, shit. Yes! Mark: Ah ha! Wade: Mark you know what to do. Mark: How about a little bit of this action! Wade: Oh well- that- yeah. Mark: Umm... Did you want the other one? Bob: I've got kind of a solution for all of this. Wade: Oh god! Mark: Ooooh no! Jack: Bob! Mark: Alright, so I know what cards he has- I know what cards he has. Bob: Oh Jack, I'm sorry, It's okay we'll be fine. Wade: Oh god I'm sorry. Mark: Uh oh Bob: Oh yes! Oh yes! Jack: Hey! I got an achievement! Wade: What's he got left? What's he got left? Mark: He's got a three of yellow! Mark: He's got a three of yellow. This is not gonna help him. Good! Wade: Ha HAA! Draw Bob! Mark: HA HAA! Mark: Ha! Jack: Yeah, we're f*cked! Wade: WHY?! Mark: Oh, god dammit! *Bob giggles* Bob: C'mon Jack. Jack: Ahhh sh*t.. Bob: You can- You don't really have a lot to do to help me. Jack: No.. Sorry. *Bob giggles* Mark: Okay. It's not the color. He's a- It's alright.
Bob: It's fine. Mark: Alright. Okay. Here we go. Wade: DO NOT! Mark: Bap! *laughs* Mark: Why would I-why would I want him to win? *Bob laughs* Wade: I-I wanted you to NOT let him win. Mark: We're teammates! Wade: I KNOW. I just wanted to be sure we agreed on that. *Mark laughs* Bob: Man that went downhill quickly. Mark: We have to agree on being on a team. *Wade laughs* Jack: Aw, come on, I clicked it! Mark: Oh geez... Mark: Oh, it's funny stuff. Alright, okay. I've just gotta... Jack: Comedy! HAHAHA. Wade: Make-make it- make it- Mark: I-I know. I- I got you. Wade: Just-oh...okay. Bob: Oh, I get to go? Jack: Bob do it. Do it, do it Bob. Bob: YAY! Mark: Oooh... Jack: YAY! Mark: I'm sorry Waaade. Wade: Oh god. Jack: Strategers Wade: This went downhill fast. Mark: Stack card? What does that mean? OH! YAY! Wade: Wait Bob: Oh. Mark: HA-HAAAA! Wade: That- Jack: He doesn't even know how to play. *Jack laughs* Mark: That did not help you at all. I could've made that so much better for you. I didn't. I apologize. Wade: NOO! Mark: I apologize. Mark: I coulda done that good- Bob: What color did he just make it? He just made it yellow? Yeah, I'm gonna make it- sorry. Sorry. Mark: I coulda done that for ya Wade. Wade I coulda done that good for ya. Wade: YEAH Mark: Ya coulda been a winner. And now you're not. Wade: Thanks. Mark: Yeah, I didn't think. Bob: Ah, sorry. Mark: I wasn't thinking. Bob: I wasn't thinking like a team player. Mark: Didn't think it. Yeah. I didn't think that. Wade: Fine. It's fine. Mark: I- I didn't thunkly that one. Jack: We still got this Bob! Wade: Uh-my Uno just crashed, Mark, so good luck with the AI. *everyone laughs* Mark: Alright. Mark: Alright AI. Wade: I'm just gonna- Mark: It's you and I buddy. You and I buddy. You and I. Mark: Just you and I. Mark: You and I bubby boo. You and I buddy boo. Wade: Wade bot. Bob: Oh my god. Mark: Luna goin' for tha Una. Mark: Ho HO! Sick move Una. L-Luna. Luno. L...ledle ledle ledle. Ledling Jack: *robot voice* Thank you father. Wade: *robot voice* Interesting play. *Mark laughs* Jack: *robot voice* U-Uno Wade: I can't believe that one just happened. Mark: *laughs* Just-yeah, Wade, just keep saying things. I'm gonna put your face there. Bob: Jack, do you know what color they have? Jack: I don't, but just play anything. Wade: I am doing wonderful- oh, look at this one! Mark: AH NO THEY GOT 'EM. Bob: Let me do that again just to make sure. Wade: It's okay because I've got THIS up my sleeve! *Jack and Bob laughs* Jack: You ain't go shit. Bob: You got extra cards up your sleeve- aw shits. Wade: You don't know how how many great cards I have now. Mark: My computer robot *laughs* seems to be... malfunctioning. *Jack and Bob laugh* Jack: Serious peril right now. Mark: Brroop! Bob: Oh.. Mark: Brrlrlrlrlp Mark: Boink Bob: That worked out for us. Wade: Internal processor is melding with- Jack: That worked out way better for us. Mark: No it didn't. You don't know that because I got- THIS!
Wade: -compressor. Wade: Ha HA! Jack: I also got these. Wade: Oh! Mark: Yeah whatever. Bob: Holy shit. Mark: You think you got that? Wade: That's alright, cause take THIS! Bob: I got that, how bout that? Mark: Yeah? Well what about this? Jack: Waiiitt Wade: YEAH! Jack: Wade, can you even see anything, or are you just dicking around? Wade: I can't see shit! (Everyone laughs) Bob: Well how bout that? Wade: WELL HOW BOUT SOME OF THESE BOB!? Mark: *laughs* You just drew cards you idiot! *everyone laughs* Jack: You have the most cards of anyone at the table! *Mark and Jack laugh* Wade: Oh God!! Bob: Hey-Hey, Jack, are you ready? Are you ready Jack? Jack: Yea Mark: HA! Try that again buddy! Jack: I clicked it!! Bob: Aww, What the fuckk? Mark: Try it once more! Wade: CHECK OUT THIS SHIT Mark: *laughing* Jack, let's go back to you doing your thing *Bob laughs* Jack: I clicked it though! Why did it not work?
Bob: OH NO! Mark: OHHH!
Wade: OHHH
Mark: OHHH Wade: WEREN'T EXPECTING THAT WERE YOU BOB?? Jack: Oh shit, we didn't click it! Mark: Ohh? Wade: Oh, man really? Wade: YEAH, WHAT A PLAN!!
Mark: Ahhhhh, ok! Alrighty then... Bob: Ok, well...
Jack: The bot doesn't have anything Bob: ... Yeah, we know-we know what's going on over there Mark: You know- You don't know Wade: You might think you know, BUT CHECK OUT THIS!! *Mark laughs* Jack: Here we go Mark: UH OH! (Repeatedly)
Jack: Wade, you just drew cards again! *laughs* Bob: *laughing* Wade, you're drawing cards again! Wade: That's alright, I got some good ones here, there's a couple plus fours! Bob: Well, fuck Wade: YEA!
Mark: No, Wade-Wade, you don't have any plus fours. Mark: I MEAN, you have ALL the plus fours
Wade: Alright, I got all the plus-plus tw- Wade: -plus twos
Bob: Wade, I h- I have an idea! Wade: Oh, how bout I play a SKIP! Mark: HA, jokes on you Bob!
Bob: No, I played. Bob: That's actually not that bad Mark: I know, Bob... I know. Mark: I'm aware of that! Jack: Uuunooooooooo *Mark laughing* Wade: HERE, Take this! Mark: Hehe, You just got skipped! *Everyone laughing* Mark: Uh jeez, I can't remember what you had, I can't remember. Bob: Impeccable, Wade. Impeccable. *laughter dies out* Mark: Oh boy.
Jack: *angrily yelling through teeth* Jack: Well played. Jack: *angrily yelling through teeth*
*Mark laughs* Wade: Yeah! Have some of this! Bob: Yeah, good one Wade. You can do it. Jack: Got you, Bob.
Mark: No. Bob: Aw sh*t son!
Mark: No.. Aww nooo! Wade: How 'bout a red EIGHT!! Mark: It made me draw cards AFTER you win?! *everyone laughs* Jack: You just lost, Wade. Mark: Yeah.
Bob: Get those extra card, loser! Wade: Wait, we lost? Mark: Yeaah.
Bob: Yes, you lost.
*Jack laughing* *Bob laughing*
Jack: You were just like, you had this eight. And then it was like- You lose. *Bob and Mark laughing* Mark: Oh, god. Get out of here, get out of here.
Bob: Oh f*ck, ah jeez. Yeah end this sh*t. Wade: It sounds like it's still happening and we haven't lost yet. Mark: No-h-h-ho. We lost. Bob: Alright, Wade. Set us- Set us up again here, buddy. Wade: Alright here, have a zero! I'm flippin' it around!! Bob: Hey Wade, *inaudible*
Mark: I'm preemptively gonna be quieter. Wade: Then you should be able to send invites. Mark: Alright, okay. Enter lobby. *everyone saying no* Wade: Jeez this has happened again! Bob: Oh no, not like this! Aaah, oh god noo! Jack: Okay
Jack (amplified): ENTER LOBBY. *everyone laughing*
Wade: God, please! Don't do that! Mark: Alright, hang on hang on, I got it. I gotta invite my frieends- Wade: ENTER LOBBY!!
*everyone laughing* Mark: Oh, I didn't hit teams. Wade: Oh, hey Jack, it's you and me. Mark: Oh wait, no I didn't hit teams.
Jack: No it's not. Bob: Oh.
Mark: I'll be right back, guys. *laughing* Wade: Well, um.. I guess
Jack: Well, uhh.
Mark: Sorry. Sorry! Wade: Every man for himself!!
Mark: Sorry! Mark: *with audio sensitivity very high* uh.. Wade: Oh fuck
Bob: *laughing* Bob: Every fucking time
