How to Tell Apart Narcissist, Psychopath, Borderline (Hint: Stability Island)

La Liga is the football league in Spain after three months of onerous lockdown matches are going to resume and for the benefit of those watching these matches online by our streaming services the league is going to add computer-generated spectators to the stream now finally every Spaniard or at least every football fan in Spain is going to fully brush and profoundly understand and comprehend the narcissus inner experience this isn't precisely how the losses is feels it's a perfect metaphor as far as the narcissist is concerned he himself is a spectacle a keen or similar to football match everyone a raccoon in the bleachers is watching him he is the center of attention there's an audience there's always an audience even when the narcissus is alone in this audience human beings they are not perceived by the narcissist as flesh and blood he perceives them is computer-generated spectators everyone around the narcissist is a figment of his own imaginary imaginary of his mind it's a piece of fiction it's a cardboard cutout it's a function it's an extension the narcissus streams the world streams is life and being watched admired I'd related observed and spectated by numerous people none of whom is real to him I just thought our alert you to this metaphor but today's topic is completely different I'm going to teach you a simple trick to tell a narcissist from a psychopath into seconds you talk to someone you want to know if it's analysis or a psychopath you need to ask only one or two questions and you have your answer but before we go there I owe you something in the last video I've been informed I forgot to add the introduction my name is Sam back knee and I'm the author of malignant self-love narcissism revisited now this one is for the previous video and now for this video my name is Sam Puckett and I'm the author of malignant self-love narcissism revisited I hope he noticed the similarities and now let's get to the to the topic how to tell a narcissist apart from a psychopath there's a very simple rule of thumb heuristic the narcissist maintains one island of stability in his life one all the other dimensions of his existence are a chaotic Maelstrom a total mess now this island of stability could be anything the narcissist remains married to the same woman for decades even as he D singly switches between careers or workplaces or or contrary he climbs the corporate ladder in the same company with the same Enterprise for 35 years having in the meantime divorced and remarried five different spouses so there's always an island of stability it could be the Tobi seal place of residence he could remain in the same country for the entirety of his life from cradle to grave it could be friends he could have a Crennel a core of childhood friends which he maintains throughout life but he has one island of stability Nevermore his marriage his friendships his domicile his business his children his hobbies charitable organizations he belongs to his activism whatever it is his profession his academic career whatever it is it's stable and it's very very long-term and everything else in his life everything is else in his life is a bloody mess chaos unmitigated disorder now this leads to many misconceptions most of them as usual propagated by self-styled newly found experts whether academic on they confuse of course as usual narcissus and Psychopaths so you can you can hear they for example the the retort of the refrain how can he be a narcissist he has excellent relationship an excellent relationship with his wife and he's been married for 50 years or he his children love him he can't be a narcissist or he has been in the same workplace since he was 18 you know allow is the chief executive officer of the company that can't be a narcissist it's too stable now cities are chaotic and the supports a mistake because narcissists always have one island of stability compared it to the psychopath the psychopath has no such peaceable oasis every single aspect of the Psychopaths like I repeat every single aspect dimension realm filled in the Psychopaths life is mayhem and pandemonium the Psychopaths personal life is disordered beyond any timeline his kaleidoscopic range of vocations his myriad on and on friendships his antisocial or defined pursuits his numerous domiciles hobbies marriages children in and out of wedlock even the number of objects he possesses number of currency has changed everything in the Psychopaths life is disordered discontinuous as opposed to the narcissist who displays an island of stability and so one could say that the psychopath is like a quadriplegic who compelled by his delusional grandiosity has spent a nightmarish lifetime insisting to compete in track and field events imagine that you are disabled from the neck down and you insist that is your you know obsession to compete in field and track track and field events so relationships with women attempt at friendships to in business accomplishing anything long long term these are all doomed the psychopath is incapable of maintaining continuity long-term planning anticipating the consequences of his own actions he acts on whims he has zero impulse control so these are all doomed and these lead to debilitating frustrations self-loathing loading a self-loathing innate rage and life-threatening profound hurt every time the psychopath faces inevitable failure and defeat owing to his own invalidity every time is cheated on every time he is rebuffed every instance of confronting the ruins of his enterprises initiatives his broken dreams and so on and so forth now this is particularly true particularly true of the quickly psychopaths you remember last video I made a distinction between the hare psychopathy or the primary psychopathic lately psychopathy some Psychopaths are capable of empathy and emotion they are known emotions they are known as secondary Psychopaths and these are the Psychopaths whose lives are utterly disordered female secondary Psychopaths are probably what we call today borderlines primary Psychopaths are more much more goal oriented and some of them are career oriented so about three to five percent of chief executive offices of fortune 500 companies have been diagnosed a psychopath by the team of hair in baby rock it's an example while secondary Psychopaths would tend to end up in prison for example they over-represented among prisoners primary Psychopaths would tend to become pillars of the community or to reach the top of their profession so there's a distinction between primary and secondary Psychopaths and there is a big debate what is the maturity I think if we take into account all the parameters emotional dysregulation mood lability dysregulated grandiosity is a impairment in reality testing etc etcetera and of course the over-representation of secondary Psychopaths among a big segment of a population majority of population women I think it's safe to say that most Psychopaths are actually secondary not primary and a primary Psychopaths are much more rare much more goal-oriented much more machine-like much more device like a nun hampered by empathy and by emotions let's revert to the narcissist the narcissist is dependent on an addicted to fluctuating narcissistic supply the narcissist life is mood of all the time the classic narcissist maintains an island of stability as I said while all other dimensions of his existence one in chaos and unpredictability and the borderline narcissist reacts to instability in one area of his life by introducing actually chaos and instability into all the others now let's expound a bit about these counterintuitive notions first of all we need to debug yet another myth which is propagated online by academics who discovered yesterday that their experts a lossless ism because there's a lot of money in the field and by victims who decided that they are experts or Gnosticism because they were married to analysis for a while so let's ignore these characters in their mission from information and let's look at academic literature scholarly literature written and compiled by real experts who are never to be found on youtube so Eastern artists is categorized by Samuel taneous instabilities in all the important aspects of his life and the answer is that the narcissus is a person who derives his ego and his ego functions from other people's reactions to an image that he invents and that he projects by noggin all of you know this and this image is called the false self the false self is a contraption it's a mechanism to extract narcissistic supply from other people insist no absolute control of the quantity and quality of narcissistic supply is possible a narcissistic supply fluctuates it's exactly like the let us say the supply of drugs you can never really regulate it it's a bit illicit it's a bit term unadmitted it's a bit under you know under the radar so the narcissist cannot really control there's no faucet it cannot turn on and off narcissism is totally dependent on his sources the narcissist view of himself and of his world they are correspondingly an equally volatile they fluctuate together with the supply up and down it's public opinion absent flaws so to the narcissists self-confidence he is utterly dependent for his self-esteem sense of self-worth he is utterly dependent on other people to regulate so he cannot regulate his sense of self-worth and self-esteem from insight in other words the very self of the narcissist is to use a yogi enter not constellated even the narcissist convictions are subject to a never-ending process of faking by others and most recent working in on narcissism in academia the University in Seoul is it the processes of ego congruence in ego discrepancy actually control the narcissists analysis strives to achieve ego conference he's trying to become ego what used to be called ego-syntonic strives he strives to he attempts to feel comfortable with himself to feel good with himself to wake up in the morning and say oh I like myself but he always fails he always fails because there are massive ego discrepancies built into the narcissist psychology massive gaps but I call the grandiosity gap massive gaps between the narcissist view of himself is ideal perfect brilliant etcetera in other words the gnosis grandiosity or what what Freud called the ego ideal and the reality of the narcissus where he is very often perceived to be a buffoon for a fool full of himself or something so the narcissistic personality is unstable in each and every one of its dimensions it is the ultimate hybrid it's rigidly amorphous devoured Li devoutly flexible reliant for its sustenance on the opinion of people and the worst thing is the narcissist devalues these people he considers himself superior to the very sources to the very people who regulate his internal environment he is crucially dependent on people in order to feel alive to feel good with himself to function is crucially dependent on people but he hates them he hates them it he holds a meat content and this is a dissonance that the Nazis can never resolve in a large part of this instability is subsumed under the narcissus emotional involvement prevent prevention measures these are a set of behaviors and traits and psychodynamics that prevent the Nazis from getting emotionally involved with anyone or anything gnosis is like a tourist like a computer-generated spectator refuge he is watching the movie of his life he's both the actor and the director but you know some movie and he knows it's a movie the narcissist lability he saw ubiquitous so dominant did he it might as well be described as the only stable feature of the person of the Nazis personality in other words if you want to be a bit cute we could say that the novice is only stable feature is his instability is only predictable facet is his unpredictability but now we will come to a cap yet the caveat that we mentioned before the gnosis is does everything with one goal in mind to attract to obtain to secure a constant flow of narcissistic supply system supplies essentially attention would be positive attention admiration modulation of flaws information could be negative attention to be filled is much better than to be ignored and an example of this kind of behavior the narcissist may study a given subject diligently in great depth in order to impress people later with his newly acquired erudition but having served its purpose the narcissist let's this knowledge that he had acquired with great effort and labor and toil he lets this knowledge proper evaporate the narcissist maintains a sort of short-term sell or warehouse just-in-time manufacturing where he stores whatever may come handy in the pursuit of narcissistic supply but he's almost never really interested in what he does never really invested in what he studies never really there or present in his own experiences we say where's the word connect the narcissist is never affected there's no cathexis he is not he is much more of an observer from the outside this might be perceived as instability but think about it this way the narcissus is constantly preparing for some kind of exam life handsome exams all the time and he feels that he's on a permanent trial anyone who is read the sport says the trial by Franz Kafka and thus ends when I'm talking it's like you're always on trial which is don't know who is the tribunal or the judges in what is the charge but you're on trial and this is the narcissus sadistic super-ego or in a critic or whatever you want to call it so it is common to forget material studied only in preparation for an exam for a court appearance we all do this and this is how the narcissus views his life is a series of disconnected episodes which are temporary and transient in nature and if nothing in common there's no connecting thread there's no continuity it has a lot to do with the fact that the narcissus is highly associated short-term memory is perfectly normal even in healthy people but what sets the narcissist apart is the fact that with the narcissist this short termism this shortness is a constant state of affairs it is only a short-term memory and he has only short-term goals and he thinks only I mean he thinks only in the shorter everything is short it's like life ends and the it is knows the point of his nose I mean this there's no horizon and it affects all these functions not only the functions directly related to learning emotional experience or to any single dimension of his mind or to love yeah how can you love someone if she can disappear any minute if there is no object constancy if there is no perpetuity if there is no continuity if everything is disconnected and kaleidoscopic and nightmarish you know how can you attach how can you bond how can you love how can you experience anything meaningful how can you make meaning in your life but so the versus learns remembers forgets not in line with his real interests or hobbies because he has none he loves and hates not the real subjects of his emotions because he has none there's only one dimension utilitarian cartoons constructed by him Potemkin villages everything is a facade there's no three dimensions only two it's a painting now his life is a painting not a sculpture not let alone an organism analysis judges praises condemns expresses opinions opinion aids whatever all from the narrowest possible point of view the potential to extract narcissistic supply so the gnosis doesn't ask what I can do with the world or what I can do in the world but he asks what can the world do for him as far as narcissistic supply Nasus funds in and out of love with people with workplaces with residences with locations with hobbies with interests but because they all seem to be able to provide more or less narcissistic supply for no other reason if they can provide supply is in love they can't provide supply they don't exist they don't exist and so on this lack of object constancy which is internal is also externalized any partner and intimate partner velocities will tell you that this is absolutely mind-bending how the narcissist can intensely focus in love seem to love his his spouse or his children only within this this panel five minutes or five hours or five days absolutely lose all interest in them as though they were less than strangers not entities transparent and see it's important to understand that is opposed to psychopaths but is what I've described until now applies also to Psychopaths for different reasons psychopaths are not interested in narcissistic supply the primary psychopaths are goal-oriented and secondary Psychopaths are motivated by negative emotionality such as envy or vengefulness or rage externalizing ratio or anger etc but both these categories the narcissist and the secondary Psychopaths it at this stage of the description field that's how the psychopath experiences is the secondary psychopath experiences his or her world but here they diverge here I'm going to delineate the differences between the secondary psychopath in the narcissist between the borderline in the narcissus narcissist as opposed to Psychopaths belong to two broad categories the compensatory stability and the enhancing stability types let's start with the classic narcissist classic narcissist are all come on display compensatory stability what do I mean these nurses is the classic narcissist the overt narcissist they concentrate on one or more but never most aspects of their lives and they make these aspects stable they stabilize these aspects but they do not really invest themselves don't misunderstand it's not like they are committed they there's no commitment in the narcissus life there's no commitment of course in the psycho man's life they may imitate and emulate commitments they may even persevere for very long periods of time but there's no real emotional commitment there's no emotion but then they stabilize they make certain things stable and this stability is maintained by in both with artificial means so they they bribe people around them to stay with them money or or they become famous and celebrity buys them some stability or they acquire power and then of course they have a coterie of psycho fans so on and around them celebrity has fans or they pursue dreams over they use fear to want to intimidate people into deter them or to sold whatever the means are the end result is that the gnosis Creed's stable Islands stable ambience stable environments not so the psychopathology only the gnosis and these classic narcissists also believe that they're often straited uniqueness and security guarantee the unwavering loyalty and longevity of their sources of supply a typical example is an artist who changes numerous work places switches between work places all the time here's a few careers myriad vulpes Zander systems is a Marxist one year the next year is a liberal the next year is a conservative I mean the President of the United States comes to mind he changes faiths I don't know he converts to Islam at the same time this narcissus maintains preserves a relationship with a single woman and even remains faithful to her it's another myth online that narcissists unnecessarily adulteress that they necessarily cheat if the island of stability is the woman the spouse the intimate partner cheating is actually very rare going to abandonment anxiety she he's this island of stability and to fulfill this role she just needs to be there for him physically not to abandon him within the shared fantasy I encourage you to watch my previous videos where I described the whole process of shared fantasy mothering and souls of all the gnosis is dependent upon his woman to maintain the stability which he lacks in all other areas of his life and so he uses his spouse or intimate partner in this example to compensate for his for the instability for example in his career or he can use his career to compensate for the instability in his private life this happens a lot with policemen for example cups cups have this their career is pretty stable but you know the marriages disintegrate same with live medical doctors and yet emotional closeness is bound to threaten tenacity and so is unlikely is actually likely to distance himself from the from the intimate partner to remain a kind of detached and indifferent to most of her basic needs and in some cases the losses it realizes this and in order to not lose this island of stability he makes arrangements which allow is intimate partner to outsource her sexual and emotional needs from other men from other people so we have open relationships only a marine open marriages they are they have increased dramatically over the past two decades today for example three and a half percent of all household arrange arrangements are open marriages where the partners are allowed to seek other six partners so is this a coincidence that the rise in such arrangements the rise in the number and frequency in incidents and prevalence of such arrangements went hand in hand with the rise in incidence and prevalence of Gnosticism I don't think it's a coincidence I think there's narcissus grew up because you know narcissism erupted and exploded with the baby born as they aged in so on arrangements such as open relationships and open marriages became much more common at any rate there's always a stable island in surrounded by by a vertical by a vortex by maelstrom by a storm perfect storm in all other fields of life and despite this cruel emotional treatment of the Nazis the the he considers they for example in him with intimate-partner he considers her to be a point of exit a form of sustenance exit strategy a fountain of empowerment and this mismatch between what he wishes to receive what he's able to give the gnosis is professed to deny repress and bury deep in his conscious unconscious and by the way this is why narcissus always shocked and devastated to learn of his wife's estrangement infidelity or intention to divorce his possessed of non motional ticks he is completely one-track minded he cannot fathom the needs of others he cannot empathize even when he does reach when he does make arrangements to allow his intimate partner to cater to him needs outside the diet he still he still doesn't really grasp it emotionally it's more like a business of transactions and of course I'm focusing on this type of island of civility but the workplace could be an island of civility the country could be an island of stability a political party could be another disability the church charitable organization one sip once children once parent whatever it is and what I mentioned the workplace this maybe even walk on its the career narcissist nos it most losses is actually married divorced and remarry with dizzying speed everything in the gnosis is life is in constant flux friends emotions judgments values beliefs places of residence affiliations obvious when it's taken to extreme for example in borderline in secondary Psychopaths this is known as identity diffusion there's no clear core of identity but in the case of the career narcissist the only thing that is stable predictable is his work his career his work his workplace his career path his professional horizon his commitment to his profession his erudition the depth of his knowledge skills acquired all these are the comprise an island of compensating stability in his other wives mercurial existence and this kind of narcissus dog divine unmitigated ambition and devotion he's absolutely compulsive and obsessive he persevered in one workplace or one drone patiently persistently he blindly lines up the corporate ladder and he treads the career path he would also tend to be callous and relentless and he descends a bit psychopathic and he would little hurt other people on the way to the top in his personal pursuit of job fulfillment and achievements this kind of nonsense is ruthless unscrupulous very often successful it's an open question whether what baby attend here and others identify Martha stalled others identify as a primary psychopath is not actually a narcissist who is a career narcissist a goal-oriented not it's an open question because with primary Psychopaths grandiosity is so massively emphasized it's such an important determinant of the disorder that perhaps there's this place to consider fusing or merging these two and that's making a single personality disorder with a psychopathic emphasis a narcissistic emphasis or psychopathic style nor cystic stand all psychopathic overlay not cystic only so this is the first kind of narcissist the the nurses with compensatory stability instability everywhere and one island of stability and that is another time and this is the borderline narcissist first describe my convert actually the motor like narcissist displays a different kind of behavior and I call it enhancing instability this other kind of neuroses the borderline gnosis which I think would merge and fuse with the secondary psychopathy we are beginning to see that one type the compensatory stability narcissist is very very similar to the psychical in the the primary psychopathy and the borderline the enhancing instability gnosis it would be very similar to the secondary psycho and what am I talking about so this current of processes the borderline gnosis the enhancing instability gnosis he enhances instability in one aspect or dimension of his life by introducing unpredictability and chaos in others and so for example if such a narcissist resides or made redundant fired yeah so he would immediately also relocate to another city or move out of the country it's like I lost my job there's an island of instability here instability as this part is not stable I'm going to karyotypes I'm going to disorder I'm going to destabilize destabilize deep stabilize all other dimensions of my life I lost my job I'm gonna divorce my wife and I'm gonna move out of the country or to another state and so or I I divorced my wife I'm going to leave my my position with the company I'm gonna find I'm gonna I'm gonna go fishing for two years or to a monastery in Tibet so when there is a when when if they experience instability in one dimension or realm field or area of their lives it has a ripple effect and they initiate instability in other parts of their lives and is added instability gives this type of narcissistic feeling that all the dimensions of his life are changing simultaneously that is being unshackled free free spirit the transformation is in progress end it most importantly that he's in control of the transformation it's of course an illusion those who know the analysis normal atrocities frequent conversions decisions crisis transformations developments and periods his schemes his plans is you know they you know is a bit manic in this stage they most people see through the pretensions of such a narcissist his protestations these solemn declarations they say into the core of his instability they know that is not to be relied upon that know that they know that with narcissists transience is the only permanence but enhancing instability narcissus which I essentially borderline because they have dysregulated emotions they have mood lability the lack of impulse control they are very frequently defined so they're like secondary Psychopaths they allow no if they say if you change that total change in fact if one thing changes I want everything to change they and this gnosis is a true team they hate the pedestrian plague they hate the mundane they hate the repetitive when an asset like this finds himself doing the same things over and over again he gets bored and depressed he has a low boredom threshold which is also typical of Psychopaths this kind of analysis over sleeps over eats over drinks in general engages in addictive impulsive reckless and compulsive behaviors and this is his way of reintroducing risk thrills and excitement into what he emotionally perceives to be a barren life he seeks adventures the problem is that even the most exciting and varied existence becomes routine after one living in the same country in a lot in the same apartment sportsmen social distancing living the same apartment meeting the same people doing essentially the same things even if the content changes sleeping with the same person all these qualified the eye of an artist is incarceration stultifying wrote wrote something that drags him down the chuckles him that prevents him from expressing himself constricts is likely he hates constriction itch restrictions his constraints eh rules he initially sings and he feels entitled if ëletís is right due to his intellectual physical superiority renaming he is right to lead a thrilling rewarding the light of scopic life he wants to force life itself or at least people in his life to yield to his wishes and his needs and supreme among his needs is stimulation variety diversity so these are kind of nurses who are likely to cheat on their wives or husbands just because it's fun just because they want to taste something else something new just because of the variety even if the relationship is wonderful and the sex in the relation in the primary relationship is wonderful even if the wife is the most amazing sex with the husband still most amazing sex with the husband and love flourishes and he adores her she would still sleep with other men she will sleep with other men just to taste to sample the menu and this rejection of habit is part of a larger pattern of aggressive entitlement the narcissist field is not this kind of Knossos modal analysis feels that the very existence of a sublime intellect or a gorgeous body such as a thesaurus they warned concessions they warrant allowances by others and so a woman would tend to be histrionic hyper-emotional and seductive in a man would tend to be grandiose and cerebral in some some cases or I don't know bodybuilding muscle-bound brawn machine in other cases sustaining in line standing in line for example is a waste of time it's better spent pursuing knowledge inventing creating benefiting humanity the narcissus should avail himself of a best medical treatment preferred by the most prominent medical authorities lest the precious asset that is the narcissist businesses is lost to mankind he should not be bothered with trivial pursuits with details details are lowly functions and lonely functions are best assigned to the less gifted to the inferior shippo the devil is in pain precious attention to detail entitlement is sometimes justified if you are a Picasso or a nice team but few narcissists are a Picasso or a nine steam most narcissist achievements are grotesquely grotesquely incommensurate with their overwhelming sense of entitlement and with their grandiose self image and of course this overpowering sense of superiority often serves to mask and compensate for a cancerous complex of inferiority moreover the narcissist infects others these contagious infect others with his projected grandiosity and their feedback constitutes the edifice upon which he constructs his self-esteem narcissists this luck gnosis regulates his sense of self-worth by rigidly insisting that is above the madding crowd while deriving is not seasick supply from the very maddening crowd from the very people he won't sentient as I said before and so this abhorrence of the predictable has to do with emotional involvement prevent prevention measures the dimension before despising routine avoiding avoiding the day-to-day the quotidian it is one of these mechanisms if you avoid if you avoid routine if you avoid the repetitive and the rotten and your volley avoiding life this is life life is is made of these things of rituals life is made of rituals the morning coffee the the first phone call they the keys to your spouse and these are all repetitive routine ritual but they are the foundations upon which we build our sense of well-being their function is is is important and the gnosis is trying to to prevent himself from getting emotionally involved in these things and so narcissists commonly have been approach avoidance repetition option the trust the narcissist feels and loathes the day-to-day reality routine intimacy stability security but at the same time he craves them everyone does everyone everyone does even Psychopaths everyone wants once in a while to put his head on the pillow and just relax to be able to relax but there's a difference there so the gnosis approaches and then avoid significant others or important tasks or places or institutions in a rapid succession of apparently inconsistent disconnected styles so to summarize this part this the narcissus is what type of gnosis who has one island of stability marriage career whatever friends church one island place of residence 100 civility everything around is a mess chaos Maelstrom and there's another type of narcissists who when any part of his life is destabilized teetering changing transformed he immediately introduces instability unpredictability and chaos into all of the parts of Italy these are the two types now substance in appearance play a crucial role in the narcissistic pathology and many people say that many scholars say that psychopathy is a form of narcissistic pathology and that borderline definitely is a form of a narcissistic pathology so or cluster B including histrionic they all seem to be essentially narcissistic authorities and so what is narcissism it's the detention the dissonance the contrast the war between appearance and reality substance and spectacle and so why do some diseases end up being overachievers pillars of the community accomplished professionals especially psychopathic nurses while their brethren other notices fade into obscurity having done little of note with their lives why is what determines whether or not cyst is a success story and many of them are and or a collapse losses a failure or even a covert gnosis a rat narcissist analysis who anticipates failure there seems to be two types of gnosis those who derived ample narcissists explain from mere appearances from facade from visage from pulling the wool over people's eyes they are con artists they're fraudsters in heart and there are those whose narcissistic supply consists of doing really substantial deeds of acting as change agents of making a difference and of creating and producing things of value yes novices do that the former aim appearances facade Potemkin village you know this this kind of Nazis he aims for celebrity you know the famous definition is celebrity is being famous for being famous and the other kind of narcissist he aims for careers preferably in the limelight one of them is is concerned with impression management and the other is concerned with making an impression this making depression with real achievements real accomplishment the celebrity narcissist has a short attention span he rapidly cycles between idealization and devaluation of ideas ventures places people and this renders the celebrity narcissist and feet for teamwork though energetic manic very often this kind of narcissist is a slacker is indolent lazy he prefers the path of least resistance and adheres to shortly standards of production his lack of work ethic can partly be attributed to his overpowering sense of entitlement and to his magical thinking both of which give rise to unrealistic expectations of effortless outcomes the life of the celebrity nas is chaotic characterized by inconsistency and by entire lack of long-term planning and commitment he's not really interested in people except in their roles as instruments of instant gratification sources narcissistic supply the celebrity narcissist is learning an affected erudition they're designed solely to impress and are therefore shallow and anecdotal he is a pond pretending to be an ocean the actions of the celebrity noses another gear told creating works of lasting value they don't care told he is not interested in effecting change or making a difference all the celebrity Nazis cares about his attention provoking in garnering attention attention attention in his copious quantities as possible celebrity Narcisse is therefore not above lying confabulating plagiarize in otherwise using shortcuts to obtain his fix shortcuts it's a shortcut not see the other strain of gnosis the career narcissist is conscientious action is very concerned with leaving his mark and stamp on the world he feels that he has a calling of course like every novices he believes that his calling is of cosmic significance he aggrandize ins inflates his calling but he's busy reforming his environment transforming his balloon making a difference producing and creating in over opera or standing value his is a grandiose heed a fix which he cathexis he is emotionally invested what it does to scale these lofty self imputed peaks and to realize his pretty unrealistic goals the career narcissist acts with unswerving passion and commitment he plans and the knee inexorably and ruthlessly implements his schemes and stratagems is a workaholic in pursuit of glory and fame the career narcissist does not recall him from cutting the old corner preferring the occasional confabulation or absconded with the fruits of someone else's leap exactly like the celebrity masks but while these amount to the entire history biography arsenal modus operandi exclusive what is apparent with the celebrity losses in all these plagiarism at revelation line it's all the celebrity novices does but in the case of the current narcissist these are fringe activities marginal auxiliary activities the main weapon of the career narcissist is toil investment seriousness the career narcissus is a natural-born leader when he is not a guru in the center of account he operates is first among equals in a team and this is where difference between these celebrity noses and the career narcissist these differences are most pronounced the career narcissist Pro social the relationships maintained by the celebrity non-system manipulative exploited even and a femur passing temporary the career gnosis is by contrast and comparison by contra distinction is willing and able to negotiate to compromise to give and take to motivate other people to induce loyalty to forge alliances to to create coalition's to benefit from these teams or coalition's alliances in the long term long term celebrity gnosis shortened career narcissus long term and it is this capacity to network that guarantees the career gnosis is the place in common memory in an abiding reputation among his peers and so you see instability plays a role in the narcissus life the Psychopaths life but it's not that simple it's utterly wrong to generalize as most people do combined by saying that narcissists are unstable they cannot be trusted they're not reliable etcetera etcetera then nuances nuances in Hughie's and distinctions to say otherwise to say that all artists aren't stable is black-and-white thinking it's splitting it's a lot statistic statement gnosis is split they have this infantile defense mechanism and all the victims self-styled real imputed fake many of them fake all the victims who paint the narcissist with a demonic black brush they are acting not statistically they're doing exactly what gnosis is do Nasus is think of other people in terms of all good or bad or useful or useless or black-on-white dichotomous thinking so be careful there narcissists are human beings very deficient very deformed very partial human beings but they're still human beings and human beings are by far the most complex creations ever dwarfing the complexity of the universe to throw around generalizations as people do including self-styled experts is not only irresponsible and misleading it could be simply dangerous

Channel: Prof. Sam Vaknin

Views: 230,897

Keywords: stability, compensatory, psychopath, career, workplace, friendship, church, organization, institution, marriage, family, society, children, wealth, generations, sex, women, men, manosphere, feminism, relationships, gender roles, unigender, economic, power, slavery, civilization, history, muscles, professions, psychopathic, narcissistic, victims, abuse, divorce, one night stand, cheating, adultery, promiscuity, single, alone, alienation, atomization, anomie

Id: ss513qxYeaE

Length: 52min 34sec (3154 seconds)

Published: Fri Jun 12 2020