How to know a man is interested?

hey I'm just testing out this on YouTube live see testing up you to live want to pop in on I got a question today and well I see this question all the time when I'm doing my Instagram Q&A and the question is how do I know if a man is interested and today I've been hearing a lot you know in coaching sessions women saying to me oh if a man contacts me every day is creepy and that always kind of creeps me out because I'm like wouldn't you want to hear from someone every day if they're interested in you or if you're interested in them and so one thing I see a lot is that because of social media today because of the text message society and because of the dating apps men have a lot more women to entertain so if a man goes on a dating app he's meeting five to ten dateable women every single week so you're talking twenty to forty dateable women every month and then because of text message you can text with five to seven to ten different people at one time and so you text a lot and a lot of women today are putting a lot of emphasis on the hello beautiful like that good morning text in the morning which it means nothing because you literally can have a list of ten women text hello beautiful copy it and then just paste it in the next nine messages and you're done in like 20 seconds and then women are taking that and fantasizing and just letting it mean something that can mean all this but I'm gonna tell you the number one key to know that a man is interested in you for the right reasons truly interested in you for the right reasons is this man will get on the phone with you every single day for at least an hour now I know some of y'all say look I only have time talk to a man for an hour for at least an hour he will get on the phone that means from 9:00 p.m. to 10 p.m. 10 p.m. to 11 p.m. you know that last conversation before bed or if it means 15 minutes in the morning when you're heading to work 15 minutes at lunch so that you can still have some time to eat your lunch and peace 15 minutes after work when you're heading home in 15 minutes that night to say good night however it breaks down and this isn't you know an exact science but understand that at least an hour a day okay 45 is about the same thing 30 is still something but truthfully when a man is interested truly interested it's going to be about an hour a day and then if he's really really interested and you have the time then he will give you two hours three hours four hours I've been married 12 years I don't know how the but this my left hand I've been married 12 years and when I met my wife we sat down our first conversation we talked for six hours we sat down the next day on the bench outside of her apartment we talked another six hours when I was at my apartment and she was at her apartment we were getting phone every night and talked to three for hours and he would be in person we would be talking like four hours minimum why I was extremely into her and I came from being a womanizer a dog a liar a cheater a manipulator a deceiver so what I'm saying is if the absolute worst man worst type of man the biggest player can meet a woman really like that want me to give that type of time and energy then the everyday guy who's not really a womanizer not really promiscuous that he definitely should be given that type of time and energy and then I was a woman if you're like look I don't want to talk nobody that much you have to question if you really want to be dating and you got a question why you got a question if you dated so many tough guys so many bad boys that call you every other day you know talk just text you majority of the times and communication he's just texting if you've gone through that so much to where that has become your no and you've been accustomed to become accustomed to and conditioned to just getting mostly text message communication or like five ten-minute phone calls you know you're talking like that you can't even get to know a person text is not real in building a relationship text is not real it is not real there's too much time to think about what you're gonna say there's too many messages that can just be copy and pasted to every single person text is not real you need to be able to talk to a person on the phone where the conversation is fluid to where they don't have time to think up lies to try to come up with all this game they just got to be able to talk from the heart you can ask questions boom boom boom right on the spot get real-time answers and to be honest with you if you live in the same city a lot of these conversations can be in person or you can do it by FaceTime where you can see a person's facial response you can see what they're saying because today in this dating app society you really want to take up as much time as the person you're dating as you can without neglecting your priorities don't neglect your priorities don't neglect your job don't neglect your children if you have children this don't neglect your sleep so there should be no neglecting but you should be taking up as much of that free time as you have to get to know someone because if you're just texting or if you're just talking on the phone every other day every three days you're wasting your time and here's the issue of that when you're not talking consistently and actively the issue with that when you're trying to build a relationship or you try to sustain a relationship like my wife and I when I you know she cooking for my son we just got home from soccer practice my five-year-old he's already in bed my 12 year old we just came home so my wife is cooking for him so that gave me some time to come talk to you when he's done eating he's getting in the shower he's going he has to do some homework he's going to bed let's say he gets in bed 9:30 my wife we we will sit and talk from 1935 early to 10:30 11:30 sometimes midnight sometimes 1:00 2:00 in the morning why sustaining and building the relationship 12 years into marriage we still try to talk an hour or more every single day sustaining building the relationship I gotta fly to California tomorrow you know so when I get in the hotel room if I can get in before she has gone to bed we will talk two hours on the phone some sustaining and building their relationship see what happens when you don't do that is if you talk to somebody on Monday and then you just text on Tuesday and then you talk on Wednesday you just text on Thursday what happens is a man has time to fill in on those in-between days and then also women what you all do is when you talk to a man on Monday you will fantasize about him on Tuesday and then you'll be fantasizing about this man you're thinking about how nice he is how sweet he is how amazing he is and you're not paying attention to his lack of effort and his lack of attention and his lack of actions that he's not showing up on a daily basis and you may be ok with it if you've been conditioned or you've been telling yourself that you don't want to talk to a man every day because of your life if that's the case you shouldn't be dating because a man has to talk to his woman every day just to stay focused because man you heard before that a man has a sexual thought every 15 seconds whatever if a man is with a woman he has to be into that woman and he has to stay locked in and focused if not that idle mind becomes the devil's playground and he'll be tiptoeing around before you know it he'll be cheating he'll be juggling multiple women and that's what a lot of men are doing today so when you are dealing with a man and you come and you say listen Tony you know a lot of my coaching sessions I'm coaching clients and they're like talk like every other day two or three times a week right well how long have y'all been doing that Oh three or four months six months eight months I'm like no siree Bob that's that you wasting all of your time because what's happening is see men have heard of the 90-day rule they've heard of that I created it in 2007 Steve Harvey made it famous in 2009 but I published it in my book in 2007 it was called a three month rule men have heard of this where that they need to give three months before they can expect anything so what a player what a womanizer what a cool dude with a bad boy what the swagalicious dude gonna do is he's gonna talk to you every other day he's gonna appease you with maybe a selfie little picture and some text on him in between days while he's talking to his other rim but what's happening is you're giving him credit for the days that he wasn't even present so he's talking to you every couple of days every few days every four days and you're thinking about him in between so you're giving him credit that he has not even earned just because your mind is fantasizing and going all this way in that way so hey understand that if a man is into you he's going to call you day not just text he's gonna call you every day and he's gonna try to give you at least an hour of his time and get an hour of your time or more if he is truly I'm talking about husband material but now this is other this the key right here it does not count the same if he lives with a roommate or he lives with his mother or he's out of work or you make more money than him what I mean by this and let's make it simple let's make it plain if he needs you in some way shape or form financially you know something like that if you are doing better than him then the amount of communication does not count the same but when a man is bringing to the table equal or greater what you're bringing to the table and he's steady and he's stable and he was independent like you he's not a codependent with his mom or with his roommate he's not a dependent living off of someone else and without a job but he has a job he has his own place he has his own car and you're not necessarily like a prize on a pedal school like y'all are equals you two dimes you're two dimes come together it's not a nickel trying to get a dime when that is the case and man who has something to bring to the table is giving you a hour a day and I know y'all talking about oh I don't need our anger at my time you ain't got much time you don't need to be dating then because if you can't dedicate an hour a day to building relationship there's somebody who can kill you this is somebody who can steal from you this is somebody who can walk you down the aisle give shirt give you his last name to end and then divorce you in a year and take half of everything that you have you already had your house or your car you already have a savings he'll be asking for alimony if you ask for everything so if you don't have an hour a day even if it has to be broken up that you can talk to a person not on text message you don't need to be dating you're not ready today if your heart can't handle it if your schedule can't handle it you don't need to be in a relationship and if a man cannot give you that he's not ready for a relationship he's not really trust me y'all think that I'm talking to you just a talking head there's a lot of talking heads out here but I'm a professional relationship coach I'm in the trenches every single day I know what makes it you see a lot of people you just in your relationship I mean thousands of relationships so I get to see the data of what makes a relationship work and have longevity and not just the exception to the rule because you may be an exception to the rule I'm talking about the majority I'm talking about the rule so talk an hour a day if that could be on FaceTime then FaceTime if you live close and it could be in person in person what set boundaries around that because you don't need to end up in the bed and we'll talk about that later on some old calls but it's Tony gasket I just want to try this you to live thank you all so much for being on here I might like this better than Instagram life and I could do it landscapes to the portrait so hey god bless y'all good talk soon you gotta English

Channel: Tony Gaskins

Views: 161,940

Rating: 4.9262919 out of 5

Keywords: how to know if he's interested, how to know a man likes you, does he like me, how to know if a man is interested, tony gaskins, life coach, relationship advice

Id: 2O4yRavMShY

Length: 15min 11sec (911 seconds)

Published: Tue Oct 15 2019