Dune: part one explained by an idiot

welcome to Dune part one it is another long ass movie so as per the huge out comes the information condensation board first thing you must know about this movie is that space has been conquered by humans and other humanoid carbon based life forms and it's now ruled by an emperor who rules over all these different houses and houses are like U [ __ ] that man I'm not explaining that it's [ __ ] Game of Thrones [ __ ] I the two main houses you got to know about for now are house at trades and house Harkin and next thing you got to know is arus which is a big desert planet that has a very important resource on it which is spicy it is the main ingredient or resource for hyper Interstellar space travel making it the most valuable resource in the universe but the native population of Ras who are called the f use it to get [ __ ] toasted I'm talking getting higher than the bat's ass here are a few of the important characters moonnight guy he's the Duke of House of Trades nuts and his wife witch mom who's got deep voice mind control powers and comes from a long line of which [ __ ] called the benites then their son Paul who inherited his mom's powers and is working on perfecting them who's constantly mewing and looks like that one girl from stranger things that has a really angular face but the male version of her obviously and last but not least fat floating ball guy he's a Duke of house Harkin another thing you must know is that I don't understand [ __ ] about movie all right I mean I understand that spice is important and the Empire is plundering the [ __ ] out of the spice planet and oppressing the femine and treating them like [ __ ] sort of like that the filthy Arabs and Americans are coming to take their oil I got that bit but the lur and the drama Twix all the different characters with weird names different houses and all that crap no idea there's witches [ __ ] Batista Aquaman is in the [ __ ] and I barely understand any of it did I read the book no am I going to read the book also no is that going to stop me from trying to explain this [ __ ] hell no let's get it [ __ ] movie begins with Zend saying some [ __ ] well first someone was using burp language or [ __ ] Mongolian throat saying to say some other [ __ ] but then Zen started talking about spice Planet cuz she's native F and how the Harkens harvested it for 80 years oppressed the [ __ ] out of them got super duper Rich even rich than the emperor himself so the emperor decided to tell them to leave Spice Girl planet for some reason and asked house steroids to take over spice harvesting then we cut to the Home Plan of house retardis where Paul's waking up from a vision dream he had about Zen although he doesn't know who she is yet he has breakfast with his mom and she makes him practice mind control powers on her and honestly I think this power has too much of a kinky undertone to be practicing on your mom but to each own I don't care he then studies some stuff about araus then the emperor sends some delegates to officially hand over the rights to harvest the [ __ ] out of spice Planet Two house sat these nuts moonight guy asks his human calculator General Army general official guy how much it would have cost them to come out all this way to do this formality and he's like 10 ditian tranquilon salaries your honor and we're supposed to GA that that's a lot of do but for all we know it could be like $50 or something anyway the Duke fist some wax officially accepting the deal Paul then goes to see Aquaman AKA Dunkin Donuts AKA Jason Mamoa he's his Pilot Soldier BFF who's going to araus two weeks before Paul and his family D to do some Mission and Paul tells him that he's worried about him because he had a dream about him that he made it to erectus and he got killed so Duncan's like I'm not going to die don't worry it's just a dream yeah let's ignore the Duke's kid son of a witch with magical powers and his dream predicted your future demise seems very smart [ __ ] anyway Paul then talks to his dad who tells him that they are in what they call in the business a very sketchy situation cuz the arens will be real mad that the emperor took spice pan away from them and gave it to at trates and that might set the stage for a war between them so when they arrive at Rex he wants to befriend the fman and make an alliance with them and cultivate what he calls desert power PA then has a quick sparring session with one of his dad's Army General dudes Thanos they train using swords and non neonian body Shields that do like a force field thing around their body that stops fast moving objects from touching them but not slow moving ones which is mighty confusing Tech to me cuz you can see here that they grab each other's hands really fast and still goes through but another big fight scenes people seem to be hitting each other really hard and still goes through as well yeah sure sometimes they hit them really hard then slide their knife across their body killing them that way and I guess that works but a lot of times I see that's not the case is there like a certain large force or speed that overwhelms the shield and allows things to go through also sometimes it doesn't even seem to be on we can't see any blue or red special effects while they fight am I seriously meant to believe that people ran into battle without turning that thing on can they not afford to give all their troops this Tech this can't be the case bro but whatever cut to the fat floating guy in a saying that the emperor does not like the house that tra's voice is rising amongst other houses and become a stronger house he's very Jelly Belly about that than some witches with trash bags on land on the house Arro is this planet in the middle of night and see to talk to Paul and his mom the big boss b and jarette witch goes into a room and uses deep voice mind control powers on Paul to get him over in front of her he's like how dare you use the voice at me put your hand in the Box what's in the box put it in what's in the box pain what the [ __ ] would I want to put it in then just do it it's in the script he puts it in and she holds a poison needle to his throat and says that if he pulls his hand out of the box she's going to pick him with it and kill him her hand seems awfully unstable and he might SCM around because of the pain so consider moving your hand slightly further away from his neck so you don't acally kill the dude you [ __ ] idiot he starts experiencing heavy pain his mom experiences period cramps on the other side of the door he doesn't take his hand out of the box and endures through the pain cuz D Goin popped into his mind saying stay hard [ __ ] the pain eventually the Ben and jer's witch takes the needle away and tells him that's enough and he and takes his hand out the box the test is over he passed mom comes in old [ __ ] asks Paul about his dreams then leaves him on her way out she talks to Mom like we had to test it to his limits he wields too much power he wields our power and you just had to give birth to a boy didn't you cuz you thought you could give birth to the one she also tells her that they did what they could for them on the racus then the bener would just leave and Paul who overheard some of this [ __ ] is standing in the distance like hey M what's all this talk about me being the one and she's like we've been carefully Crossing blood lines in hopes to create the one a mind that's powerful enough to bridge space and time so no pressure then now all this [ __ ] means something [ __ ] if I know what that is but it's something for show they all get into their spaceships and Trel to spice planet where they get a big Royal back pipe welcome from their troops that were already there before them to do some scouting and like securing of the area or whatever the locals are there pointing at Paul calling him lisan Al Gayu which means the Messiah or the one or whatever cuz the Ben and Jer witches were here spreading rumors about him to protect him or something like that I don't know they get into some mosquito ples to fly from from the airport over to the main city in the mountains that is protected by a big Shield that protects him from big ass 400 met long sandworms that are super aggressive and very deadly the Duke Scopes out the place with Thanos which mom gets us special knife that is sacred to the Fine people that is made from the teeth of the sandworm I believe as a gift from one of her new fine Maids who believes that she and her son are the ones Paul inspects some non-native palm trees in the middle of the scorching hot sun without having a single bead of sweat to drop down his face which is INF [ __ ] possible bro even if the palace or whatever is air conditioned really well he still had to walk a fair bit to get here so this is just ridiculously unbelievable to me anyway he then goes off to chill in his room and learning more about a spice Planet when a little bug drone sent to kill him melts through his wall and flies directly at him stops right before his eye then he moves out the way it flies past and he grabs it and squashes it in his hand he's super lucky that drone's tip wasn't lying with poison because there's no way he didn't prick himself and kill himself also why stop before his eyes did he stop it with his powers does he have more Powers CU he able to move [ __ ] with his mind book people explain this defend your precious literature actually I don't care they find out that Harkon spy was hiding in their walls for 6 weeks waiting for the perfect moment to do this but they found out and killed him maybe they killed him right at the exact moment to where he was attempting to kill Paul and that's why I stopped right before actually no I said I don't care I don't care [ __ ] it cut over to the Ben and Jerry's witch with the fat floater talking to him telling him that the emperor will send reinforcements to help him take down the house of Trades and attack them but not to kill mom witch and Paul because they are direct descendants of the Benes e ws and to only Exile them instead so he's like fine you have my word I won't harm them which is cheeky fat wording because he technically won't hurt them he'll just Chuck them in the desert and let the elements and the worms do the job for him so if she does a magical light detector test on him he can technically say that he did not kill them and he did Exile them just in the desert obviously by the way what is stopping the Ben deser witches from being the ruling class or whatever they literally have mind control that's so op bro does the emperor have a better power is he immune doesn't matter back at spice Planet the Duke has a meeting with everyone everyone stands up to honor him including the fat human calculator General guy but when they cut everybody sitting down he seems oddly settled which annoys the [ __ ] out of me because are you telling that Captain blubber over here sat down and got settled faster than everybody else on this table with a normal BMI [ __ ] off whatever Mr bot Li tattoo says the Harkens left them barely any equipment to harvest spice with and what they did leave him with was old and effective then Duncan Idaho finally arrives he the mission he was on was to intermingle and get accepted by the fman who have super blue eyes at side effect of being around spies for so long and live in underground cave systems he successfully got accepted by them and got to know their leader who he invited over to talk to leader Giga Chad Duke leader comes over super skeptical and very honest they have a small conversation and Duke tells him that as long as he's in charge of aret his people will not be hunted and they will not be oppressed like they were under the rule of the Harin fman leader is like cool thanks then leaves but not before saying that he recognizes Paul and fman language later Guk Paul and Thanos put on steel suits which are fade bodysuits that recycle your body's fluids mainly sweat but I'm guessing can also do piss turns it into clean drinking water with minimum loss or wasted water which you can suck out of straw through this provided mask then they join this fman [ __ ] who's supposed to oversee the transition or handoff of this planet from the heinens to the TR queef her name is Dr K and they go off in some mosquito planes to see the spice Fields they fly over the desert for a bit and she goes welcome to the spice Fields [ __ ] they got to one of their spice Harvesters at work with drones overhead looking out for signs of a sandw attack which always happens 100% of the time because all the noises and the vibrations that the Harvester makes attracts them then they see one plowing through the sand far away coming to attack they estimate they have five minutes till it arrives the crew of the Harvesters alerted the Duke listens into their Communications and finds out that they're really calm because this happens all time so they're really used to it they calling for carryon to come and extract them and airlift them away it comes over TR Caton but one of the arms fails Caton and they start panicking calling to evacuate Duke decides to help out and go down with his three musquito planes to try and extract the crew of 21 people take seven each in each plane Paul goes down to help and lead the people into the planes but gets [ __ ] baked and starts stripping balls because of all the spice in the air and as soon as everybody gets on the planes he's found kneeling at the Harvester so Thanos goes to snap him out of his psychosis and bring him back to the plane but while doing that the worm gets really close turns his head into the quick s because it's vibrating [ __ ] out of it but they are able to get on the mosquito plane and Escape right before the cursed Fleshlight services and swallows the entire Harvester I have a few things I want to say about this past sequence first off Paul asks why they don't Shield the Harvesters like they do the city and K responds with shields a death sentence in the desert it attracts the worms and drives them into a Killing Frenzy how come the worms don't attack the shield of City then [ __ ] is it because the cities in the mountains and the worm naturally avoid the mountains because they can only swim through sand or is it the act of putting the shields into the ground that attracts the sand worms and not their mere existence second the crew of the Harvester after already having established that they need to evacuate contact the Duke that's trying to help out saying this sir is protocol for a reason we take one step out there as good as dead besides we got to follow the spice we can't just leave what's the protocol exactly in this situation you stupid [ __ ] everyone take as much spice as you can carry and make a run for it the [ __ ] this gu talking about and third how is Paul breathing properly there's a significant amount of sand floating around through the entirety of the scene which would and should make it really hard for him to breathe but he only puts his mask on once to a big plume of dust comes in then he takes it back off again should have three kilos worth of sand in his lungs right now but anyway when they come back to the city Duke's like Dr K you see they set us up to fail but she's like not my problem mate then Paul goes to see a doctor who thinks he got higher than Bob Marley off the spice hence the tripping of the balls but he tells his mom he wasn't high he was just having super Vivid Visions that were probably still triggered by the spice about zenyata and important knife and that his mom's pregnant and she's like how do you know that I barely just found out she freaks her [ __ ] a bit and goes to talk to Duke who was mad because ever since Paul talked to the Ben talk to the benages which he's been unfocused and he's like if anything happens will you protect son with my life I'm not asking his mother I'm asking the Ben JZ you protect Paul why are you having these thoughts [ __ ] answer the [ __ ] question you evasive [ __ ] I [ __ ] hate when people do this dog then before they sleep she massages his head and he says this I should have married you this is what I'm talking about this is why I'm confused aren't you married already did he forget to say earlier at the end of that sentence whatever man I don't [ __ ] care in the middle of the night Dr OU takes out some guards and disables the city's Shields allowing the hinin to attack while the Duke wakes up from asleep cuz his Spidey s tingled finds that man gets shot with a poison D in his back by Dr OU the poison D takes a while to penetrate his n Anon B Shield but eventually penetrates leaves him paralyzed only able to breathe look around and have some control over his mouth and voice doct always says he's sorry that he betrayed him he had to do it because the Harin had his wife and they said they Fe her if he did this but he's still kind of loyal to him so he tells him that he's going to do what he can for his wife and son and he plants one of those fake Sinai pill teeth in his mouth that if crack will release the deadly gas will kill him but if time correctly he will kill anybody else nearby as well while this is happening the har attack and a soldier wakes up General Thanos telling him that someone turned off the city's Shield so they go out to fight and I hope he orderers someone to go turn them back on if not that'll be so fuing dumb a back battle ensues the ground troops fight in close quarters using melee weapons only and barely any long range weapons at all although they've proven to be at least somewhat effective PA wiom got tied up and flown out to the desert to be dropped off there somewhere witch mom is the only one with the gag on her mouth the kidnappers brains are just as smooth as their bald heads because they know that these two are descendants of the benad jits and that they have deep voice mind control Powers so not putting a gag on his mouth as well is just fantastically [ __ ] he is just barely able to mind control one of these goons to free the gag off of his M's M who can more reliably mind control them because she's better practiced and the Art of deep voice cany mind control she forces the goons to free them kills them and the mosquito lands and gets disabled by the other heinens they find a care package left in there by Dr OU to try and help him and that care package contains the following an a trades Beacon a sand compactor which is a thing that moves sand out of the way a fman compass and a tent that functions like a bigger steel suit that can be buried under sand and his dad's at tradies ring they impack all that stuff in the tent that getting mared by the sand and realize that Duke gab beard is dead and cry about it for a bit however Duke isn't dead yet he's popped down naked at a dinner table with the fat floater at the other end getting fatter Dr OU walks in and says I did everything you asked me now give me my wife so the wide load starts to be a wide float flies over says thanks chump kills him goes to up by the Duke to taunt him the Duke mutters some low volume [ __ ] to get type 58 diabetes to come in close crackes poison tooth releasing poison gas the SpongeBob stank with all across the room killing everybody in it and himself but later on an Among Us Cleanup Crew comes in and finds the fat floater still alive somehow stuck to the ceiling back in the silon Paul sees some spice and for some reason now although it was always there before it triggers the vision about Zena and him fighting in a war as a f burning bodies and a bunch of other stuff he freaks a little bit yelling out [ __ ] like a war in my name a war in my name then their Beacon start sounding meaning that someone's close so they try and make it out a tent using the S compactor to make way and find Duncan Utah Landing his metal mosquito down to come and get them see he was up during attack and locked in he fought his way out found a big mental mosquito plane and then took it evaded a bunch of space lasers and escaped sought the help of Dr K who was ordered by the emperor to not do anything or say anything or see anything but it's helping regardless because she thinks that home dog son of the Ben and Jerry's Witch is the leisan alib the Messiah the one the sand King the Paul BL dun cop whatever they pick up Paul and his mom and fly over to her Hideout which is in a facility that was built to pump water out of the ground but is now not in use because spice is important [ __ ] they meet some of Kinds as fman followers she tells them to make them some coffee out of their spit and get to Paul and which mom still suits then Paul discusses game of thrown options on how to deal with Emperor's attack on them should he tell the other houses start a war against the emperor should he make a play for the throne of mar one of his daughters blah blah blah and while kinds his femine peeps were mixing saliva with [ __ ] caffeine they sense that someone's cominging and hide in the sand real quick their suspicions are indeed correct because the her find out where they are somehow and send some wiches to attack them the fman pop out of the sand to try and fight them but get overwhelmed because they are outnumbered then Duncan Illinois hears this and sees them coming so the absolute doofus knucklehead decides to lock the door of this hallway to protect Paul and his mom and fight the attack us to the death there are many reasons why I classified this as a [ __ ] move but I'm only going to mention one this guy could have either locked the door went with the rest and continued to protect the last two remaining atres maybe they find a way out maybe they don't he has to stay in fight either way or he locks the door and he's on the other side inside the hallway and fights an unknown amount of attackers and dies becoming completely useless to Paul and witch mom forever now here's the thing in both cases the door is going to buy them time to try and find a way to escape so homie literally died for nothing anyway as mentioned dude fights and dies Paul Mo about on the other side of the door wasting even more time the attackers start cutting through the door with a laser so kind takes them to escape through a secret passage tells them to go down the left tunnel find the mosquito Chopper and get in there fly 5 km above the incoming storm to avoid it and make it to safety that way while she finds her own way because she says that she's fine the desert is her home also the mosquito only seats two people [ __ ] squeeze in there throw some [ __ ] out the shed way this isn't a [ __ ] valid reason [ __ ] also why didn't they Puck the other play next to this one it has a convenient very obviously closing hatch to protect it from the incoming storm or maybe not maybe it doesn't actually I don't care I'm not going to dive too deep into this one this video is getting too long as is K gets out puts a thumer into the ground which is a thing that makes rhythmic vibrations to attract the sandworm she's going to try and lure over here then ride it and Escape but she's un aable to do that because attackers come and stab her jokes on them though because the worm is already on the way it arrives and the cursed Fleshlight Hoovers them all up together meanwhile Paul and his mom took off in the middle mosquito and weren't able to climb up to 5,000 m because they find out they got three other mosquito on their tail launching rockets at them so Paul lives head first Into the Storm to try and lose the rockets and he's successful in that because the heavy storm acts like system and destroys the Rockets but now he's struggling like mad for control of the plane then he gets a vision of Tyler Duran telling him to go with the flow one just let go so he does and shuts down all the controls to the plane Let Jesus Take the Wheel through the power of updrafts wind and massive amounts of [ __ ] they are lifted up to 5,000 m he turns on the rocket to push him a little bit above that they run out of fuel but now they're in sort of clear air so he spreads the barely functional wings and Glides over the sandstorm but these Wings eventually fail and snap off they Start Tumbling towards the ground make a crash landing but survive and run over to the Rocks put their Ste suits on and started looking for a fman SI which is the underground like village where fman live in using the compass they given cut to this little bald [ __ ] playing with those magnets that go and dumping diarrhea into a tub where the fat Flo is taking a dip in that [ __ ] bath full of dirty engine oil is supposed to be healing him somehow while Drax reports to him that Paul and his mom are dead because they were observed going to that Sandstorm and absolutely nothing survives that so they presume that they're dead so the fat floater orders him to sell their spice reserves really slowly and kill off all the fine back with Paul and wiam they're walking across the desert using a special walk that does not attract sandworms he gets a few more visions and eventually they hit a weird ass Patch's hand that attracts sand warms no matter what I believe and a sand warm starts coming for them they start running towards the rocks make it there and the sand warm surfaces they're still very much in dangerous here but they just stop and look at it while it stares them dead in the face it too stops because the thumper got set off nearby and got distracted by that so it leaves him low and goes to check it out they take a quick rest but then Paul signals to his mom with weird sign language that they're not alone they're both kind of surprised by that although they shouldn't be because no [ __ ] dumb asses you literally just said someone set off a thumper nearby that directly implies that you're not alone retards anyway they find a group of fman and the leader of the fman just happens to be in the group as well they want to kill both of them and harvest the water in their body but Paul tells him that he met him before he's the son of the Duke and whatever fman leader thinks he's the one so he's like the boy is Young he can learn our ways he can stay but the woman is too old and cannot fight she must go he goes down to kill her but [ __ ] assumed incorrectly because she fights back and gets the better of him so he's like [ __ ] okay [ __ ] can fight I get it and decides to keep them both around till they get to the SE and then they'll figure out what to do with them Paul who ran up to a vantage point to protect his mom with a tiny pistol finally meets the [ __ ] from his Visions she very unnecessarily takes her mask off which is obviously only meant for a dramatic movie Reveal but what I'm wondering now is how the straw and the face mask connects to the rest of the bodysuit if the mask gets taken off so easily anyway they all start moving because the sun is rising and it's going to get real hot but then this one black dude doesn't like the decision that the fman leader came to saying that only the strongest may lead and he got bested by the [ __ ] witch mom so he challenges her to a duel and if he wins against her I'm guessing he's going to challenge the leader take his place and lead I don't know doesn't really matter he challenges her to a duel but the leader says he can't challenge a sadena to a duel and I don't know what the [ __ ] that means it probably means protected party guest [ __ ] hoe I don't know but she is that and he can't challenge her so he's like fine she must choose a champion to fight in herstead so Paul steps up to be his mom's Champion Zena or channy as she is called gives Paul one of their Sac chis knives to use in the fight they start a duel fight a bit but then Paul keeps getting the better of the black guy asking him to yield but they tell him that there Ain no yielding in this duel is a fight to the death and after some more hesitation cuz Never Killed the man before he pops the murdering cherry and kills the crazy black guy he's kind of sad about that but gets over pretty quick F leader says he's one of them now the wrap up the dead dude carry him and start walking over to the sieg they see a mad lad riding a sandworm off in the distance and Paul goes wow then channy's like yeah you ain't seen [ __ ] yet buddy and the movie ends this movie gets 58 beaches off the coast of Chile out of 501 trillion quadrillion tons of [Music] sand [Music]

Channel: High Boi

Views: 736,932

Keywords: dune: part one recap, dune: part one explained, high boi, funny, haha, alien, dune: part one

Id: sRq8X3ACCV4

Length: 17min 5sec (1025 seconds)

Published: Fri Apr 05 2024