Don Jr. Defends Trump Crime Family, QAnon Shaman Runs for Congress & Where the Hell is Mike Lindell?

previously on Jimmy Kimo Live come here I'll Hold [Music] You e in my car maybe there's something dead on [Music] it from Hollywood it's Jimmy Kim tonight Paul Dana Nick aleran and Seth broken plus music from T and little way with quo and Theo and now Jimmy [Applause] Kimel [Applause] everybody I am thank you very much for watching thank you for barreling through raging freeway Inferno to be here oh that's nice and I know what it happens to be my birthday today thank you I 73 years old today that's right 73 years old everybody says I hope you have the best birthday ever today I will tell you with certainty it has not been the best birthday ever it's started off rough I got on the scale this morning I have one of those digital scales that connects to your phone and that way you can keep a record of your weight for future Generations I guess and for my grandchildren and this scale it's like an $80 scale every time you get on it it tells you how much weight you either gained or lost since the last time you got on it so I get on it this morning and the first display is a little graphic says happy birthday I'm like which is a weird thing coming from from an appliance you're standing on naked and then after happy birthday next screen it tells me that since the last time I weighed myself which was Thursday by the way I've gained 4.9 lbs happy birthday you gained 5 lbs in 4 days I almost took it out to the garbage I almost threw it in a recycling bin I also got a lot of text today when your birthday's in the news you get a lot of text from like a guy that got you tickets once to cir the Sol a driver picked you up at the airport in Detroit you're like what the hell 2008 was the last that kind of thing the people you really want to hear from on your birthday but I also got a nice email from a celebrity this morning you want to guess who that celebrity was G not you although I did get a nice text from you uh Ben Affleck not Ben Affleck no George Clooney not George Clooney no Matt Damon no come on I said will phell I said a celebrity what will frell not will frell no the answer is Weird Al Yankovic gave me so I think I made out in the plus column speaking of making out do you see this video of Travis Kelce and Taylor Swift woo indeed Travis Kelce flew all the way to Argentina to see Taylor Swift in concert you know she makes him buy the tickets he has to get them on Ticket Master like everybody else and after the Jo she comes off stage and uh he's there she runs jumped into his arms and then he ran her back 57 yards for a touchdown it was incredible these two I mean me she is on tour around the world and still makes it to his games on Sundays he's in the middle of a football season he's flying a buenos aurus they're making it very hard for every other couple that's in a long-distance relationship right now oh you can't make it to my mom's house for Thanksgiving this this year Travis flew to Singapore for Taylor on the other side of Humanity's coin we have Donald Trump Junior who was in court again this morning uh there he is you hear the protesters chanting crime family crime family and that is basically what these people are a crime family a very dumb crime family the gamb Boos if you will and Don Jr he's so embarrassing he's on the stand and he's testifying in this $250 million fraud trial and he has to compliment he said his father is an artist with real estate yeah he's an artist with he's Vincent Van going to jail with real estate is what he is he's he also posted that his dad is the father of Hotel gyms he said maybe someone put a gym in a building somewhere but no one did it at the scale of my father he's saying that his father the father of the hotel gym is a guy who has never stepped inside one okay the amount of ass kissing in this trial is insane DJ TJ of course denies any and all wrongdoing and is instead going with the our accountants did it defense I'm not supposed to rely on a big five accounting firm like one of the biggest accounting firms in the world I can pay them millions of dollars I rely on them to do accounting but I'm supposed to know more than them by this logic insurance companies are going to start suing patience for listening to their doctors right you understand like I am I supposed to know more oh Don junr doesn't know anything about I'm not an accountant I'm a business guy I'm I mean I'm a I'm a business guy who who had his elbow soldered together and now I move my arms like a muppet all the time and with all the complaining the trumps do about this trial playing out in the media you could barely even turn the channel without seeing their lawyer doing an interview with somebody what have they been asking the kids and tell me how they fit into all of this they don't fit into all of this what have they been asking the kids it's very simple they they'll ask the kids did you give a value to somebody did you do something and everybody said resoundingly no and these kids did nothing wrong they should not be in this case ianka is already out of the case the boys should not be in the case that's right they're just boys they're they're kids Eric has a book report du this weekend they're both still wearing pull-ups they're on trial I mean come on Don and Don Jr had some father and son uh event this weekend they went to the UFC fight at Madison Square Garden there they are Trump's being cheered on with he's got Dana White there he's got Tucker Carlson in the back he's got Kid Rock in toe and of oh yeah there we go little fist bump Don Jr was thrilled to be a part of the group he posted this picture of him and Tuck cackling and their blue Checker print shirts couple of banana Republicans right there and and by the way Donald Trump's older sister Maryanne the former judge died this morning they found her unresponsive in her apartment she was 86 years old so far today Trump has posted uh lashing out at The Witch Hunt attacking derang Jack Smith going on about radical left zealots and thugs plugging a book of letters he's selling no mention of his sister whatsoever I hope he at least has the decency to find a good plot for her on the golf course meanwhile another Republican candidate has Whitted her himself out of the race Tim Scott has decided to suspend his campaign for president if you don't know who Tim Scott is is why he decided to suspend his campaign for president this is Tim uh asking voters to paint him like one of their French girls this is he's gone now and that's a shame I was looking forward to seeing what weird way he was going to sit next so with Scott out the remaining candidates for Republican uh are Donald Trump Ronda sandz Chris Christie Nikki Haley Fred Freddy Krueger uh SN Whiplash and a Big Mouth Billy Bass I think and on the independent side you got RFK Jr who is not only is he antiva he's also apparently anti- Soxs because he was photographed strolling around Barefoot on a food covered airplane floor it takes a special kind of psychopath to wear a belt but no shoes and but this is how you build natural immunity big Pharma won't tell you to walk around Barefoot on an airplane because there's no money in it for them but and then we have another unbalanced candidate remember the Q and on Shaman this guy well he's out of prison and now wants to serve time in Congress he's running as a Libertarian in Arizona it's like they say if you can't violently overthrow him join him I kind of I have to say I kind of want him to win just so we could see him in the lunchroom with George Santos there's another new Trump book coming out tomorrow this one is from Jonathan Carl of ABC News it's called tired of winning and there's pretty good nuggets George Carl says in 2020 Trump hung up on Kim Kardashian who was calling to try to get someone out of prison because he suspected she' voted for Joe Biden and he also reports that Trump was obsessed with the totally Banana's idea that he could somehow be reinstated as president it's an idea he got from our my pillow pal Mike Lindell who promised Trump he would be reinstated August 13 2021 eight months into Biden's term I guess that didn't happen but hasn't stopped Mike Lindell the pillow man is still at it zooming in through his TV live stream from all over the place he seems to be traveling constantly why we do not know but we did spend some time putting his whereabouts together hello everybody Welcome to Lindale report we're going through slippers here they've turned a blind eye to this election crime just a computer air can cost an election that's why they're attacking my pillow we get rid of the machine we melt him down we turn him into prison bars Brandon how am I coming in on loud and clear when I failed got evidence in January of 21 it shows China was in the in the inside really the mic p a 2.0 it went viral on Twitter there's Mike hey Mike the election of 2020 is going bye by I got must be in a No Parking Zone here or something it's a beautiful day here for America our customers have always stepped up Donald Trump won we're going to get him across D we're going to be attacked I had the highest credential did it appear like he was attacking me that's the law there nothing to make a joke about I just got stung by a bee I'm going what is that pin going into me we're going to send a formal invitation to Jimmy Kimble tune in Jimmy Kimble on Wednesday night we've got to get rid of the computers in our in our election is that a new thing you're doing where you kind of blur the background jump on the band leg in the F Des because your machines are going to be bye-bye Frank social being the report well I think we lost Mike yeah hey we lost we lost Mike a long time ago it's just just coming around to it now it's a busy time for Mike Lindell no doubt but even busier for our embattled former president who I guess in an attempt to mend the wall between himself and the Latino Community sat down on his balls for an interview with Univision where he was taking a task on a number of subjects by one of the toughest journalists in any language do you see where this is going oh let's find out and welcome interview of Donald Trump Mr Trump first question stormmy Daniel say you have a chalupa that is very small is that I do me too it's okay okay next question what would happen if you stopped eating at McDonald's they would be out of business they'd be out because you eat so much I do me too what about Melania how would you describe your marriage it's a hoax yeah that seems right I have to say you look very Orange today sir some people say you look like an Oompa Loompa what do you think of the Oompa loas they're energetic people they have more energy they have they're very smart they're incredible people they're passionate people you know it's always tough to generalize about people but you can you know some people say oh that's not good it's not politically correct you're probably right it is time to stop being so PC about Oompa Loompas great Point sir oh I have another question for you can you tell me who's this that Silence of the Lamb that's Hannibal Lector do you know him he's a friend of mine he's a tremendous man he's been very loyal to me I've been very loyal to him next question who are these guys Guys these are people that are very very disturbed very very mentally yes they seem very bad and very ugly too anyway thank you for inviting me to your very weird house before I go I have a surprise it is my honor to announce you have been named Mexico's 2023 pendo of the year W you look great sir like a real pjo you you're welcome that was my exclus interview with Donald Trump back to you in the studio Tony great very great great work know who Tony is but you're [Applause] outstanding

Channel: Jimmy Kimmel Live

Views: 2,249,376

Keywords: jimmy, jimmy kimmel, jimmy kimmel live, late night, talk show, funny, comedic, comedy, clip, comedian, mean tweets, Monologue, Guillermo, Hollywood, Los Angeles, West Coast, Cold Open, 10 Freeway, Birthday, Scale, Weird Al, Travis Kelce, Taylor Swift, Kiss Felt Round the world, DJTJ, Trump, Donald Trump, UFC 295, Dana White, Republican, Democrats, Tim Scott, RFK, Qanon Shaman, Trump Book, Jonathan Karl, Mike Lindell

Id: yvBS2bFP4GQ

Length: 13min 58sec (838 seconds)

Published: Tue Nov 14 2023