CollegeHumor's Worst Days on Set

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(hip music) - A very tough moment for me on set was when we were shooting Honest Camping Trip. - [Director] 101J Take 2 (Grant moaning) - [Grant] Oh, I'm in Hell, I'm in Hell. I just don't like being in the woods. I don't understand why anyone likes the woods, I don't know what's good there. (laughing) - You are such a fucking coward. - There were big wasps flying all over the set. At one point, a wasp landed on Trapp's hand, and I went, "Trapp, Trapp, Trapp!" And he's like, "Oh yeah, that's my bee friend." Cause he's a fucking psychopath. The nearest hospital's three hours away! Oh! (others cheering) Oh God! (groaning) I'm normal for being afraid of bees. It's fine to be afraid of bees! It is a regular fear that I have. - That's how I would have set up the tents, but - Hey! We're three hours late because none of our cell phones have service. - Oh, that's alright, I was just explaining how camping works. I would know, I was a boy scout in 4th grade. West. - Great! I brought a rope, and what I assume is a AM FM flashlight radio; I've never been camping before and I'm truly just guessing. - Hey, that's alright. I brought too much stuff. It's all brand new, I hope no one notices. - Well, I'm gonna go urinate in as private a spot I can find and hope I don't pee all over myself. - There are no private spots. (laughs loudly) Zach, let me walk you through which plants are edible. - Oh, no thanks, I don't wanna eat dirty leaves. - That's okay, I'm going to anyway. This is mostly for me. (crunch) - I'm a pyromaniac. I'm gonna get the fire going and then obsess over it all night. - Fuck, I think I'm allergic to everything here. I might die on this trip. - Oh, Katie smells like urine! Let's all try to ignore that. - I accidentally peed on my shoes. I tried to wipe it off with leaves, but clearly that didn't work. - Oh, you think you have problems? I'm on day two of my period and I kinda haven't figured out how to deal with that shit out here. I hope there's not bears. - Ooh, we should cook dinner before it gets too dark out. You know, at five o'clock. - Good idea Cynthia! We've got hot dogs without buns, an unopenable can of refried beans, and stuff to make s'mores! - I've got beer, wine, whiskey, and vodka. - And drugs! - I think the food's ready. No one complain that it's ruined. - Oh, awful! - I'm only eating this to be polite. - I didn't bring any water, I'll just drink beer and have a massive hangover tomorrow. (snapping and rustling) - Oh right, I forgot my tent is broken. I'll have to fix that when I get home. - Or, you could just forget about it until the next time you go camping three years from now. - Now that's a good plan. - Well, there's no way to clean these sticks, so hopefully nothing took a shit on them. - Cool. (distant shout) - Oh no, other campers! What if they're murderers? - They're probably just assholes looking to party in the forest. (sniff) - Oh here's a fun idea, let's play that game we all know from camp! - You mean the one we all learned slightly differently, so we'll argue the whole time over the right way to play it? - Exactly, and if nobody else wants to play, I'm gonna sulk the entire rest of the trip. - That sounds awful! I'm already drunk! - [Others] Me too! - Mother fuck, I'm the most sober one here so I'm gonna have to be responsible! - And the nearest hospital is three hours away! (all cheer) (birds chirping) - Man, it is way too early for us to be up, but birds are surprisingly loud. - (yawns) I didn't sleep at all. - Let's all get the fuck outta here! - [All] Yeah! - My worst day on set was also my messiest day on set. When we filmed When You Secretly Love Ranch Dressing, - It's just like bats everywhere, bats there, bats, - [Man] We're outta ranch. - Oh, okay. - Our production designer had to manually blow air through a hose of watered-down ranch to make it fly out all over everybody. (splattering) (air blowing) (laughing) And we did this before we realized that ranch dressing actually burns your skin. And so what we did for our faces was a mixture of yogurt and sunscreen. So it can see in the video that it's a slightly different hue. - [Man] And action. (laughing) - The rest of our bodies are just burning. (laughs) - So I'm like, "Clark, if I got to Toronto, "you'll be the first person to know." (laughs) - Wings? And would anybody like ranch with that? - No thanks, we're not goddamn hillbillies. (laughs) - [Voiceover] Do you love ranch, but find it shameful? Then try new Hidden Hidden Valley Ranch. With Hidden Hidden Valley Ranch, you'll always have some delicious creamy dressing right up your sleeve, literally. Everyone knows ranch is a poor man's unsophisticated sauce. But that doesn't mean it's not delicious. Hidden Hidden Valley Ranch is easy to use. Just buckle in the backpack, run the hose along your arm, and pump the pedal to pressurize the hose and provide easy access to that beautiful creamy ranch. Hidden Hidden Valley Ranch. It's just too good, even if it does make you feel like a trash possum. - Zach? I haven't seen you in forever, you get a bear hug! - Wait no no no, no no! - No you gotta get a bear hug. (flatulent explosion) - [Voiceover] Holy mother of shit. - My roughest day on set, in the short amount of time that I've been here, was on I Swear I Didn't Wreck the Bathroom. - [Man] They had poops. - [Brennan] Wait, what? - [Man] Had poops on sale. - [Brennan] Oh fuck. The bathroom was the grossest thing I've ever seen. It was nauseating to watch. There was a puppeteer, her name's Alexis. Wonderful, professional puppeteer . And then me leaning against the stall doing the kind of (laughs) (fart noise) And Alexis, again, a consummate professional, had her head fully up under the bowl of this toilet. And she has to syllable for syllable match every noise I was making. I forced that woman to live under a toilet for a day. - Everyone's going to think you did it! (laughs) - Hi Alexis. I'm so sorry. - Just gotta wash my hands. (groaning, muttering, pooping) - You okay in there? (noises continue) - Yep, yeah I been there Dirty business. Yeah (laughing) (pooping louder and laughing) - Uh, you ate something weird, or? (laughs) - What the fuck! - Just ruined this bathroom! (laughs) Everyone's going to think you did it! (laughs) - No, no, I was just washing my hands, and you're in here, what the fuck are you? - What does it matter what I am? All that matters is everyone is going to think you did this! (laughs) Goodbye! - What? - Oh! Oh God! Zach, what did you do? - No, it wasn't me it was this, it was a goblin. - Oh, oh it was a goblin? Come on, you are disgusting! What did you eat a milk and broccoli burrito? - No, no-- - Oh God! What the fuck happened in here? - It was Zach, he went insane and shit the worst kinda shit everywhere. - I was just washing my hands, I didn't even use the bathroom! - I can feel my eyes burning! - But it wasn't me! - He says a goblin did it. - Is that the best you can do, seriously? Fuck, man. - Oh God, it smelled so rank in here that I had to come check it out. - Yeah it was, it was - Zach's ass exploded or something I don't know. (splatter) - Ugh, ew. - Oh, it's all over you. - There we have it, undeniable proof. - Not it wasn't me (giggles) It was him, he did it! - Grant? Normally that would make perfect sense, but you're the only one in here, Zach! It was you. (sniffs) - You're weak. - Oh my God. Guys, I just looked it up and Zach, this actually makes you a sexual predator. - Oh, that is it - Zach, you have to go - [Girl] You have to go! Get outta here! (voices fade) (mournful music) - [Man] You're done here! (sobs) - Ugh, God. - Who does that as an adult? - Right? Well, crazy that that's the last we'll ever see of Zach, and that this was his legacy. - I had a really though moment on set with Bar Trivia Ruins Your Night. - [Director] Here we go, and action-- - Sometimes when you're writing a sketch, you hit a moment where you think "This is what is "comedically the most fun thing to do." Where someone will explode, or someone will be in a pool of cottage cheese. Or, in some cases, Zach will write a sketch like Bar Trivia Ruins Your Night, and it will have to be me who gets covered in blood at the end of the sketch. And with those shots, you really only get one chance to get it right. Fake blood is all just sugar and corn syrup. The stickiest, sweetest, grossest stuff in the world. - [Director] Action! (shouts) Cut. (laughing) - And then, you can't really clean yourself up that well, so you get into your car and track syrup all over your car. - This looks like a fantastic meal. - (laughs) It does-- (airhorn) - Sup fuckers! You know what that airhorn means. It's trivia night! (airhorn) - Fuck, these guys are always so aggressive. - I really don't want to play. - I hate trivia night. (airhorn) (dance music) Hey man, we're just gonna eat, I think. - Yeah, we don't really want to play-- - Sorry fuckers! Everyone's playin, it's trivia night! Besides, winner gets a free drink, and I know we're all lookin to get fucked up! Let's get it farted in here! (fart) Alright, what animal has the longest gestation period? (moaning) Come on you fuckers, this one's easy! - Could you stop calling us fuckers please? - And there's already a table playing, why do we have to play? - Because if you don't play, then they can't beat anyone. Time's up, ding ding ding ding! The answer is elephants! (elephant noise) Whatever, I know I'm fuckin funny. Okay, quick score check-in. In last place is team - Uh... - Team Uh. And in first place, The Cock Squad! - Oh yeah, - [Cock Squad] Cock Squad! - Beat the shit outta you. - You're an adult. - We don't want to play. - Everyone plays. If you don't wanna play, then get outta here! - We're like halfway through this meal. - I hate this. - That's my move! - Question Two! What is the chemical symbol for helium? Helium makes your voice high. - It's H-e (dramatic music) (buzzer) - And time! Circle gets the square, looks like everyone in the bar got this one right! Looks like you fucks aren't as dumb as you look. - That's enough! - Hey, hey, whoa man. It's part of my job to bring some personality, okay. Sorry if you can't handle that. - No, you're right. I guess I can understand that. - Kay cool, thanks. Hey, by the way, that free beer, I'll give you one if you come to my standup show tomorrow. It's at Giggle Sharks, and it's two drink minimum, so I was joking, I can't get you that free beer. - Fuck you! - You don't get comedy! - You don't get to live! (screaming) - [MC] I'm sorry! I'm sorry! (screaming) (ripping, splattering) - Too much? - My most challenging day on set would have to be when we shot Disarming Conversational Landmines. - Mark (laughing) - It was a pretty hot day, and it was super hot in that house. I was in that bomb suit the whole time, which is pretty heavy, a little bit confining, and also hot just on its own. It got a little sweaty. And this was the second sketch that we shot that day. And then had to jump into this one. Ooh boy, sorry. And this one took, I wanna say maybe seven hours just to shoot. Pretty uncomfortable. - Thanks again for inviting me to Thanksgiving. - Oh yeah of course, nobody should be alone on Thanksgiving. I'll introduce you to everybody. This is Uncle Dante, his wife Aunt Tiffany . - Hey. - [Raphael] Grandma, and Grandad. - Great meeting all of you guys. You've a lovely home. Raph's told me-- What are you doing? - There's gonna be a lotta landmines in these conversations, and I'm gonna defuse em. - So, where's my favorite granddaughter? - She's at her boyfriend's this Thanksgiving, mom. - No child of mine would ever get away with that. (ticking) - I know that you're not sayin that we're bad parents. Is that what your momma's trying to say? You tryin to say that we bad parents? You see how your son turned out. (thud) (panting) - How was Sunday mass, Grandma? - Mass was wonderful. (beep) - Did anybody hear that beep? - We should all go as a family next week. - Oh, we prefer not to support an organization that covers sexual abuse. (ticking) - How bout some football? - You know, I still have all the newspaper clippings of Dante when he played in high school. - Isn't that sweet? (beep) - There's that beep again. (beep) - I think I heard it that time. - Why is that boy kneeling during the national anthem? (ticking) - He's protesting. - [Grandma] I don't care what the reason is, he should not be protesting this country's national anthem. - He's not protesting the national anthem, he is protesting inequality. - [Raphael] What is this? - [Grandma] You do not desecrate the flag and the national anthem. That's just a total lack of respect. - Oh no. (dramatic music) No, no. - This is why we need to make America great again. - Trump! - Oh, momma come on. - Did she say that? - Everybody loves Oprah! - Oh now see Oprah. Didn't I hear that Oprah was gonna run for president? - Well she certainly has my vote. (beep) - See that's what I'm talkin (beep) bout, now you talkin (beep) Oprah can't do no wrong, she (beep) solid gold, everybody loves (beep) - Thank you Thank you so much (beep) (beeping speeds up) - Everybody get back 75 meters! (beeping) - Raph, leave him, he's a goner! - I have this suit. Save yourself. (dramatic music) There's too many locks. There's too many locks, do you understand? I tried. - It's your grandmother. - No, no, no, no - I never loved her. (explosion) - A very tough day for a lot of people on set was If Hand Turkeys Were Real. - We had a very gross prop on set that people had to put into their mouths later. Our production designer Rick sort of Frankensteined this hand turkey bird thing and told the cast that they could nibble on them, but they probably shouldn't really eat them. - [Woman] That's for seconds. - So good. - It's dripping so beautifully. - And that to me was maybe the grossest thing that I walked away with. - [Voiceover] It's Thanksgiving. A time for family, mountains of mashed potatoes, and kids tracin out hand turkeys. And no one knows hand turkeys like Jemberly Farms. - It looks just like mine! Jemberly Farm hand turkeys are plump and succulent. They're delicious whether you prefer finger meat, the little leggy bits, or the part that's both a thumb and a face. Once you're had a real Jemberly Farms hand turkey, you'll never scrub the memory from your mind. No matter how hard you try. - Yum - [Voiceover] Cause at Jemberly Farms, all our hand turkeys live the way Mother Nature intended. Briefly, if at all. And there's turkey sized for any appetite. Large, medium, or presidential. Got leftovers? Jemberly Farms hand turkeys make for great turkey burgers. Mm-mm (groaning) So this Thanksgiving, let us give you a hand with dinner. We know you'll give it two thumb slash faces way up. ♪ Jemberly Farms hand turkeys ♪ ♪ What nightmare hath man wrought? ♪ - Smoked turkey legs, ground beef, pork, chicken, pork sausage, chorizo, chicken thighs, whole chicken skin, chicken bones, spare ribs, and onions for nails. So... - Hi, it's Mike Trap from College Humor. Click here to subscribe. Click here for more fun things. And send help to keep me from sinking. Please, please help. Please help.
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Channel: CollegeHumor
Views: 2,222,193
Rating: 4.9208336 out of 5
Keywords: Collegehumor, CH originals, comedy, sketch comedy, internet, humor, funny, sketch, lists, katie’s coke habit, terrible things, fails, messy, good look, costumes, grant o’brien, shane crown, brennan mulligan, mike trapp, raphael chestang, ryan anthony martin, cynthia kao, zac oyama, siobhan thompson, katie marovitch, frankie mclafferty, sam reich, joe spellman, ally beardsley, ch shorts, ed buhl, claire montgomery, austin zajur, samantha desman, matthew nelson, anais fairweather
Id: ZTEZOQ-vVO4
Channel Id: undefined
Length: 18min 32sec (1112 seconds)
Published: Thu Mar 08 2018
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