Cody and Noel Do: Drunk Baking (pt. 2)

wow that's fantastic actually you know it goes really good with fried chicken what chocolate welcome back what up guys welcome to another episode of cody noel do today we're baking again we're gonna make giant pizookies if you don't know what that is why don't you explain it's a chocolate bazooka no it's a pizza cookie that's what that is you can go on down to bj's and get yourself a pizza they're like three bucks off on fridays i think someone just told me now yeah is that right he's like that's right sound guy yep you got it so we're gonna make them from scratch today with the drunk goggles on as you know in the last episode we did these um we never told anyone the ratings on these this supposed to be a 0.2 0.2 blood alcohol yeah yeah oh point two that's really good yeah yeah yeah that's like yeah on the verge of death you get one of these my mouth is dried dude give a bump we're trying to zelda to the food network all right yeah so we can buy more [ __ ] blow it's chicken's actually really [ __ ] good man i might sprinkle a little bit from the pazookie yeah i count down okay ready yeah go ten nine eight yep seven six five four three two one go go uh why is there a tos on a cooking site is it asking you if you can you can use cookies yes oh i do failed that one thank you unsalted butter unsalted butter we need this recipe it's like english so first of all it's all in grams second of all the sugar is called caster sugar [ __ ] water and the brown sugar is called light brown muscle sugar back on the blow step one eat the butter and sugar together into light and fluffy oh yes all right we ate the butter and the sugar together it's a lot fluffy add the egg and vanilla let's go fam are you [ __ ] serious hello what the [ __ ] is 85 grams let's do it 100 grams is half a cup half a cup okay that's that's half a cup about okay we have to soften this [ __ ] too what does that mean you just like you just do this there we go it's soft enough i'm just creating this all right all right bro how much caster sugar do we need 75 grams i'm canadian i should know this [ __ ] 100 grams it was half a cup okay so it's half a cup times point seven five right point five times point seven five it's a third third it's like a four thirds before the quarter no it's not that'll be 0.25 so it's 0.37 0.37 cup so it's like 40 call it half okay [ __ ] half a cup round it up all right his cat oh is caster sugar brown sugar is that what he said yeah no no cat no this is caster sugar i feel like i'm gonna vomit just a little less than a quarter cup half cup oh [ __ ] you're right no no you have yeah yeah a little less than 9.75 it probably should actually be it should be a third cup like a heaping third cup i don't like that they use heating it's [ __ ] dumb just put a heaping what's a heaping bro i haven't been married long enough to know what a heaping is all right [Music] i'm creaming this right now this is called creaming and also what i'm doing in the bowl is also called creaming it says beat the butter and sugars together why are you creaming if it says to beet i prefer creaming oh got it yeah yeah i actually prefer to beat until i cream sometimes so just just so just beat it right let's see if that's cream oh that's creamy i just [ __ ] up my portions add the egg and vanilla beet to combine watch this ready yeah it's an old baker's trick right here once you've just been doing it for long enough one hand that was actually that was actually pretty [ __ ] clean is a way better idea what the [ __ ] why is this made out of a world war ii chassis kitchenaid was like well when we stopped making engines for the spitfire airplanes we had leftover carburetors and what we realized is they actually make great cooking tools so that's how you get the kitchenaid [ __ ] it up hey knock it off what is self-raising flour again self-raising flour you guys have flour that just does all the work for you okay you have the flour i'm way behind dude i'm still in the creaminess it doesn't take me long to cream oh it smells like [ __ ] ass dude this smells like movie theater popcorn between someone's toes all right what kind of [ __ ] sugar was i using it's it's a wrap right now let me get this [ __ ] world war ii killing three teaspoons of baking powder what all right do you cream this part yeah that's what you cream yeah you're creaming it out a half teaspoon of salt what if it was like add the egg oh there we go that's not even doing anything it's just like stuck in there bro this ain't even creaming like what the [ __ ] have you never creamed before no i've never creamed before really yeah you can't just go straight from i mean uh zero to cream you have to like work up to it damn just get a teaspoon of half a teaspoon of salt here all right [ __ ] time for playing two what if i just went crazy noel has [ __ ] up his crib [Laughter] he has to go for an alternate strategy noel is having trouble creaming today [ __ ] i need a new cream oh man i didn't cream he'll check for another bowl and another stick of butter to hopefully cream this time he hopes to cream to completion i really need to cream oh [ __ ] i need a cream cody the baking savant is already almost on his dough damn it he's creamed already he creamed earlier today he won't stop creaming oh boy i don't know if i'm gonna cream today i like to go in with my hands after i cream well i [ __ ] up my cream so now i got a hand to beat it hopefully if i get in there with my two hands i can cream yeah i like that it's like a cream before i even started jesus christ look at this look at this cream this [ __ ] cream [Music] what did that cookie do to you shut up i'm not [ __ ] around this time i really almost just fell over i think you won the last episode not this one baby hey cam look at me look at me not this time okay look at this huh did i just get a fat ass ah it's got shell in there i gotta do this [ __ ] drunk hey if there's a shell in there it's all right you'll live beat that [ __ ] egg into it this dude's not really that good we got a rolling pin up in this [ __ ] you might have creamed a little too soon junior you know what it's fine i might have got some bumper in there how big is it supposed to be [Laughter] no give the discipline a little bit bad cookie that looks good right that's a good size i can't tell how big it is that could be five feet long i wouldn't know hey why does your cookie have a black eye what are you doing dude it doesn't matter i'm making custard dude you like this cream right here oops you need some help dude no i'm good tough luck that looks good something smells like poop over here i said cream so i sat on it i sat on it and dragged myself across it yeah this is actually for our for the tmg only fans we're gonna be sitting on these cookies after we bake them i can't get past the creaming face keep mixing that'll turn into dough probably we'll see oh yeah this feels like dough when you're in my peripheral you look like a tiny person you're like you look like wide putin in my peripherals do you see he's like resigning yeah it's wild yeah parkinson's wait what yeah it's a good cookie topping yeah this is just cookie talk cookie talk putin's resigning did you know that the empire state building is the fifth science whatever wow yeah yeah she's the box lose last night oh that sucks it sucks damn cookie talk with noel and cody i don't think i'm getting past the creaming face yeah that looks horrible yeah all right i'm not giving up i'm just gonna try to put this under the creaming machine [Laughter] it's not working no [ __ ] yeah dude just take it with your hands and mash it together that's how you mix it dough you little [ __ ] bad [ __ ] a teaspoon i can't see it i have a teaspoon of salt what's a teaspoon like yeah that's a lot that's way too much take some out yeah and you can even you can even with the back of the handle oh a little bad girl hear that all right now we need some chocolate chips where's chocolate chips at night [ __ ] say one no never stop where the chocolate chips at cash toss that whoa what the [ __ ] yeah you nailed that my hands are so doughy i can't get this [ __ ] open i know it'll do the trick on this oh yeah let's get it open ready glasses are hurting my face that's the main problem it's all foggy or something there's a light in here that looks not bad thanks dude little [ __ ] say one i should probably save some of this for later yeah yeah here here yeah thank you great where are those little [ __ ] for the little lobster hands that's not even close to being cooked that's none that's going in for three more minutes yeah let's feel it the slap test yeah so what do we do now let me just wait take some selfies all these things i've been feeling really depressed lately like nothing is working out and like there's no future you know yeah just like the climate crisis and everything it's like i might not even have kids you know yeah i tried to drown myself did it work no bummer can't even do that right yeah you know putin hires people to be drowned he's stepping down he has parkinson's oh wow yeah okay oh we got lightly browned i think that might be done these goggles feel like there's no end in sight i'm putting the shmallows on and then we're going one more minute oh you know what they say in the oval of a ding-dong clean as you go you just want them concentrated right in the middle of the cookie you don't want them at all on the outsides put the marshmallows right in the middle of the cookie that's what i've done here concentrated them in the middle don't do that you just want to clean as you go all right let's actually try to get one look at my elbow that's the key yeah look right in my elbow [ __ ] game on audio he's like ah no more no more scream right into my mic here's cookie talk sorry cave i'm sorry he's just gonna turn the machine he's like no audio game i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry please please all right folks all right let's transfer this boom you know what's gonna spice up this cookie holy [ __ ] did i did not just kill that you did honestly you did the waiting part sucks i know we could do more cookie talk if you want yeah so my testosterone is dropping oh no rapidly wow yeah usually doctor says it happens at 40 but for me i guess it's early yeah like 39 that's crazy yeah it just sucks you know yeah and i've been feeling really depressed yeah i think we already talked about that though have you thought about trying to drown yourself yeah i was going to but then my friend [ __ ] that up so it looks like a candyland game board took a [ __ ] on your cookie a deer just took a [ __ ] why did god make them so close what chocolate and [ __ ] [ __ ] jesus if you're listening why did you make it so close with these goggles it looks like you're putting on ranch is this not ranch oh it's salted caramel ah this is gonna suck now what do we think honest opinions yeah my cookie looks anemic homie what the [ __ ] happened that this does not look right dude it's not cooked at all it's not good we failed two in a row this tastes nothing like a bj's bazooka this tastes like a paduki [Laughter] look at this cookie man in the world it doesn't look like a cookie at all bro holy [ __ ] i think it's a wrap for my cookie i got a big ass ass does anyone want some of this try some of this please is there a fortnight man just is there a fork no dude go in there with your hands so i just started making fun i feel like it's pretty terrible you know what might make it better actually what ah i can't wait till you get salmonella bro i'm waiting for [Laughter] that looks like couch stuffing covered in chocolate it's pretty not cooked dough no but cookies are supposed to be like soft like this no that's pretty that's pretty raw look at that dude you might as well just crack the egg into your mouth and chocolate damn i guess that's it we [ __ ] two in a row man we [ __ ] up two in a row it's like the easiest thing oh my god i'm surprised that we made donuts and couldn't make [ __ ] cookies thank you guys for watching uh be sure to subscribe i'm looking at everybody smash that like button smash that like button spank that like button yeah just make sure you spank it like cody spank the cookie slam that like and we'll see you guys next time peace [Music] you

Channel: Tiny Meat Gang

Views: 1,387,900

Rating: 4.9889121 out of 5

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Id: BvUZUptq3Mk

Length: 17min 18sec (1038 seconds)

Published: Thu Dec 17 2020