April Vs The World | Parks and Recreation

ha hate talking to people about things this is a nightmare Oh grouchy hmm we have to support Tom think about it as role-playing that makes it sexy that could be fun we're good can I use a weird voice and try to freak people out yes okay and uh next time you see me I'll be a stranger there's just Leslie hey hey this is my boyfriend Derek this is Derek's boyfriend Ben hey oh wait sorry what's the situation what do you mean how does this work Derek is gay but he's straight for me but he's gay for Ben and Ben's really good for Derek and I hate Ben it's not that complicated uh oh yeah sure the thing about youth culture is I don't understand it man it costs $200 I got certified I wanted to make fun of stupid people while I get drunk my two true passions what's with these fools I will bankroll you really Oh sounds like fun thank you April Ludgate professional drinker where did you study miss lead gates the wine Academy the wine Academy in Bordeaux yes Carole make sure she's in Group A I'm getting notes of dried Robins blood old dirty cashews and just a hint of a robot's bathwater mm-hmm mighty buddy what are we doing we didn't get a single thing the bent ones too sure we did we got the marshmallow shooter I think that's on the list but I want it I want it too but I also kind of want my own fork just cuz you eat really salt which is cute but also super annoying fine what what's wrong nothing it's just adults are boring and I hate them and I don't want to buy all this stupid boring adult stuff and become boring adults hey listen to me yes we're gonna get a dish rack and our curtains and a cutting board but if you think for one second I'm not also gonna get that marshmallow shooter so that I can shoot you in the face with marshmallows when you're asleep then you're the dumbest woman I know I'm gonna make me cry these are the Black Eyed Peas and I finally killed them it's a Christmas miracle hey hey so I was just at the grind and I thought you might want an iced mocha with extra extra whipped cream oh my thank you so much April Wow you're welcome oh by the way completely unrelated I just signed up for the Miss Pawnee beauty pageant that's wonderful you know that is why I decided to become a judge so that awesome girls like you who are not you know classically hot can be rewarded for their intelligence and savvy beauty pageants are idiotic but I found out that the winner of the Miss Pawnee pageant gets six hundred dollars I can be idiotic for $600 so are you gonna vote for me sister April it's unethical for me to show you favoritism you and I are like family Coffee is $7.00 yes right of course ladies and gentlemen we are gathered here today to marry Andrew Maxwell Dwyer and April Roberta legend I guess I kind of hate most things but I never really seemed to hate you so I want to spend the rest of my life with you is that cool what was your name Jennifer no its tenifer with two y's it used to be Jennifer but then I decided to rebrand myself oh wait hang on it's an X o'clock um well nice to meet you my name is April and I just wanted to say that your dress is so cute it's bungs it's on my spinning instructor wearing it and I was like shut up where do I get that oh my god who's your spinning instructor Gregory or Winona I go to Yanis who are Gregory and Winona I've never heard of them before are they better Winona rocks my world seriously you need to get me in there like that's a must must must she's the worst person I've ever met I want to travel the world with her hello I'm April Ludgate I'm 20 years old I like people places and things and Pawnee is my favorite place in the world I want to be your assistant really you hate it here so do you I'll make sure you don't have to go to any meetings if anyone comes to see you I'll scare them away wait April if you had to choose between these two ties you're hired I just figured I might as well get paid for being here hi champion oh my gosh there you are that is a three-legged dog his name is champion cuz he's the dog world's champion okay I have to ask this I'm sorry but how many legs had that dog have when you found him three that's what makes him the best he can do more three legs than most dogs can do with four except for digging he's really bad at digging and we remember what you said about making decisions in the house you want to be involved we get that so you just say the word and champion goes back to the pound where you can be put down and killed Rover send a three-legged dog to his death yes but I'm also not gonna take care of him for you well it would be nice if you helped a little because unlike you and you and I have jobs cruel but fair hey where are you I'm here where are you we're inside the main entrance you're the sign this is pointing campground oh I'm in a totally different place that's why we can't see each other I don't even want to be here the air is too fresh it's disgusting I can't breathe there's a brook somewhere that won't stop babbling shut up sweetheart just hold tight and I'll be there mm-my both raspbian parties boom spiderwebs done mm-hmm fake blood capsules oh they didn't have any really that's gross I love it we are throwing a Halloween party at our house it's gonna be the greatest thing ever someone will die Oh fun and there's gonna be beer pumpkins money goblet fake ones it's gonna be awesome we have decorations dead people that we just may not murdered but pictures of dead people from TV or movies simple fake ones candy dancing tequila all kinds of food and snacks led - no blood orphans I I don't know what that is well we did it we went to prom yeah let's go no no what are you kidding this is awesome look around the bloom of youth like flowers on the sunset of an Eagles poetry Andy I hate teenagers if you give this a chance you're gonna love it I promise it's like the movie Expendables 2 first time hated it second time hated it third time it was okay but then the fourth fifth six I'm tenth time I watched it I realized something it's just it's not good it's not a good movie now that I've convinced you why don't we go dance I'm gonna go to the girls bathroom to check the trash cans for babies but you can dance if you want really I love you thank you well I've made a little progress I'm up to four seconds with April hey April I was looking to get some new music and I was wondering if you could recommend anything the Internet I really like your haircut where'd you get it prison how's your sister doing she has the shingles who's your favorite character on Sex in the City Alf absolutely nothing what are you wearing fine if you don't want to donate that don't oh by the way I'm come on come on come on April get in your piece what do it I don't care about that prize but I'm gonna win because I want his happiness to go away my love we have to go just put all the candy in a bowl or something what's wrong did you eat all the candy no did you yes but that's not what's wrong it's just seeing all those kids out there babe I want to put a babe in you baby Andy you know where I stand on this yes I would love all the awesome stuff my body would go through I mean if all I meant was puking and getting weird stretch marks and veins everywhere then sign me up but at the end we've brought a child into the world that's gusting no deep wave all the disgusting stuff awfully [Music]

Channel: Parks and Recreation

Views: 866,601

Keywords: Parks And Rec, Parks and Recreation, Pawnee, NBC, Leslie Knope, Amy Poehler, Rashida Jones, Ann Perkins, Aziz Ansari, Tom Haverford, Nick Offerman, Ron Swanson, Aubrey Plaza, April Ludgate, Chris Pratt, Andy Dwyer, Ben Wyatt, Retta, Jerry Gergich, Donna Meagle, Official Channel, adam scott, jim o'heir, things april hates, moody april, april and andy, compilation, funny moments, best moments

Id: 3QUFzmYaPxo

Length: 10min 7sec (607 seconds)

Published: Wed Mar 04 2020