After The Affair

yo what's going on everybody welcome to Zion Church thank you so much for joining us listen we would love for you to stay connected with us and we have several ways that you can do that first it's through our Zion anywhere ever that app can be downloaded on the Google Play Store or the App Store secondly is through social media so feel free to follow us at Zion Church so sit back relax and enjoy the sermon that's about to take place with our pastor he's back [Music] if you have a Bible turn to second Samuel chapter 11 second Samuel Chapter 11 I want to read two verses out of there and my focus is gonna be in second Samuel Chapter twelve I'm glad y'all came to church today I wouldn't have anybody to talk to of y'all one year second samuel chapter 11 verse 26 says New Living Translation when you riah's wife everybody say your riah's wife when your rise wife heard that her husband was dead she mourned for him and when the period of mourning was over davis sent for her and brought her to the palace and she became one of his wives then she gave birth to a son but the Lord was displeased with what David had done and this is the end of the story when David saw Bathsheba bathing couldn't help himself had a sexual relationship with her forced himself for her she became pregnant while her husband was away at war David brought her husband back from the war trying to hopefully hoping that he would sleep with his wife because he found out he had impregnated her so that he would think it was his baby the man wouldn't do it after several attempts David sent him back to war and had him ambushed and killed that's the context when he says verse 26 says when your riah's wife heard that her husband was dead that's Bathsheba when she heard her husband's dead she'd mourn for him and when the period of mourning was over verse 27 says David sent for her and brought her to the palace and she became one of his wives he's trying to cover up what he did but here's the problem but the Lord was displeased with what David had done chapter 12 verse 1 so this is what God did so the Lord sent Nathan the prophet to tell David this story my subject of the day is after the affair I had no idea after I released the book psychology why men and women chief and after I shared my own failure of infidelity how many calls and how many emails and how many messages and how many counseling sessions I would be doing trying to help people get hope and help in this situation it didn't I never thought it would happen but it makes sense because your misery is usually your ministry if you ever want a clue to what your assignment is you look at what you survived the problem is we're so good at covering what we survived then nobody gets to see our scars but there Thomas is all around who don't just want to believe what you say they want to see what you survive let me touch your wounds and some of us have been so meticulously careful about covering everything we survived and that's why people don't get to learn what you learned and know what you know because you've covered what God lets you survive your scars are now for shame there is picture of grace every scar you have is a picture of grace and survival he let you make it and you don't need me to tell you about how Emma Demick infidelity is in our society and it's not just a marital issue 40% of committed couples who are dating each other admit to infidelity or cheating even amongst people who are not married which is very significant because I think whatever you do in dating sets a pattern for what happens in marriage I say in the book promiscuity and dating leads to infidelity in marriage why would we even expect somebody who wasn't faithful while you were dating knew who has never been faithful to all of a sudden be faithful just because they said I do well I will there's a there's this why would we expect that anyway anyway one of the blessings is as we talk about this topic today we don't have to use anybody story in here that's good we can use Davis story like God will put a story in the Bible about somebody else so we can look at them and relax you know cuz whenever somebody preaches something the way we preach around here everybody thinks I'm talking about them you know they look you look right over at me read like everybody think this ain't about shooters about David but what I love about it is is that God put somebody else's story in here and it ain't mine hey man is there anybody else in here is glad that you didn't leave during live during a time where your story could show up in the Bible and people can preach about your stuff every week I'm so glad that my I'm 90 time I was in your journal I'm talking about the real stuff you know by the way you might want to be buried with your journal amen if you transfer and as you put it in the casket with me but I'm telling other stuff nobody knows the mess that we've done you ain't tell about our testimony because all of our testimonies are censored we give testimonies at our television ready that are that are that are applicable acceptable to humans they human but I'm so glad my stuff ain't in the Bible where people can just teach on it every week so what do you do after an affairs discovered how do you navigate through that space what do you do when that happens well in this story I'm gonna give you five things out of this story and the first is in verses 1 to 12 my first point is the exposure the exposure of the affair and let me set this up by saying that all incident no infidelity cannot be stopped by close calls it could only be stopped by catastrophe hmm close calls won't stop it it has you have to be caught you can't almost get caught you got to get caught you say why is that I wish you could stop you anybody's ever been in it or in it right now you try to stop you could tell other person that's it I'm not doing this anymore this is wrong I shouldn't do this anymore and you stop for two weeks didn't week then day 15 you back in and out of control with it and the reason why is because it is meeting needs that we haven't found another way of meeting and even when somebody is almost caught they're not going to admit it in fact if you sometimes what people asked pastor if I'm suspicious to somebody I'm in relationship was cheating on me should I confront him about it and I'm saying it really doesn't matter because 95 times out of a hundred that's 95 percent 95 times out of a hundred the person is not gonna admit it anytime you confront somebody with infidelity 95 times out of 100 they're gonna lie about it with a straight face you never you're not gonna find somebody who's been in hiding for days they've been in secret they be living secretly for weeks or months or years and then you come up on lego say I he got me anybody doing that especially if they had a chance to inform the Chiti the Chiti as well that's the new word the Chiti that's the side chick or the side slick they haven't had a chance to inform everybody anybody will come out like that this is in fact in fact they were act stupid they would look with a straight face or get animated about it like you've lost your mind you can walk right up to them and show them something if I'll be like what is this now I know you saved but you're gonna put some other way what you gonna hear I know you love the Lord but in those moments the sentence is longer than what is what is well let's just say you holding up said what is this and they'll look at the same thing you're looking at and say what is what what what is what is worried you with what you want is what you don't see this naked person right what is this well what you talk about you tell them on the screen you tell me the battery level you tell mother I prayed just come out anytime somebody act stupid over basic stuff they'll and listen this ain't even new the first two human beings on the earth were confronted by God himself about something they did and guess what God says Adam what have you done he said what me right because hey what about you what me like lying is a reflex y'all relax this is happening everywhere Amen just they just don't talk about this in church see people don't talk about this kind of stuff in church and that's the bane place is going on so here's the exposure this is what God does let me get to the text verse 1 verse 1 follow with me God sent Nathan a prophet to tell David this story he says there were two men in a certain town one was rich one was poor the rich man owned a great many sheep and cattle verse 3 the poor man owned nothing but one little lamb that he brought he raised that little lamb and grew it up from his childhood grew it up I'm sorry with his children it ate from the man's own plate and drank from his cup listen to this relationship he has a dis lamb he color in his arms like a baby daughter one day verse 4 guests arrived at the home of the rich man but instead of killing an animal from his own flock or herd which by the way he had many sheep and cattle he took this poor man's lamb killed it and prepared it for the guests now watch this during this time if you had a visitor coming to your community or town and they knocked on your door you had to be hospitable and and host him you had to put him up and feed him that was the part of the requirement so if you're traveling through you look at the rich man's house the poor man's house you like I'm going to this house you don't say it like it ain't real hard I'm going to stay like you playing Monopoly don't want to stay at Mediterranean or boardwalk I'm gonna go on a boardwalk you understand and so now this is a nice home but the man doesn't take from his own resources to supply his guests he takes from a man who had raised this lamb like it was a child the lamb ate from his cup and ate out the plate with him and he held the lamb it was a very precious thing to him and he took this lamb and killed it and prepared a meal with the lamb of the lamb for the guests and the Bible says David went off when he heard this story I mean he went on liquor verse five he says and surely as the Lord lives any man who would do such a thing deserves to die he must repay for lamps at a poor man for the one he stolen for having no pity this is David Joel who's saying all this he said this is not right let me tell you something you know us you know it's possible to be sinful and judgmental at the same time I need to say that over here for the slow people over I said it's possible to be sinful and judgmental at the same time I know that suggests the position I know that's oxymoronic I know that doesn't equating that makes sense but it is possible to be living buck wild but judging everybody else particularly when people don't struggle with what you struggle with there's one thing when somebody's see when people struggle with stuff you don't struggle you be like they need to work on that they need to get their life together they need more discipline in their life but when somebody struggles with you struggle you be like hey we all got problems we all all have sinned David throws the law at this man this man should die for this and and they this is you're the man now up until now pastor Jeff he has never confessed anything wrong he has just been in cover-up mode and this one story shocks him into confession shocks him enter his into realization of what he's done in fact here's a quick parenthetical lesson if you've ever had a hard time getting through to somebody how they've treated you how they've hurt you or what they've done wrong and they don't seem like they're getting it they defensive they got walls up one of the things you might want to try is telling them a story like tell him a story of something they can relate to like the reason why David could relate to this is because he was a shepherd and he knew what he knew this was dead wrong for this man to do this so if you got some writers in the cars tell him a car story you may say God give me a story that will help this person understand how their behavior makes me feel if they're into music if they're in the sports if they're in the computers whatever they're into try to find a way to give an illustration that helps enlighten them because if you just accuse them of something they're gonna be defensive but if you can bring if you can say can I share a story you and they don't know where the story is going they say that's cold you could say and that's you I mean don't do it like that that's just to register yeah yeah that's good it is good it's good so watch this so then here's what happens so it's been exposed right then Nathan says today but you are the man verse seven the Lord God the God of Israel says watch this he says I anointed you king of Israel I save you from the power saw I gave you your masters house and his wives and the kingdoms of Israel and Judah and if it had if that had not been enough I would have given you much much more why then if you despised the word of the Lord and done this horrible deed well you have murdered Uriah the Hittite with disorder two ammonites you were stolen his wife everybody say his wife from this time on your family will lay by the sword because you have despised me by taking who your riah's wife to be your own this is what the Lord says because of what you have done I will cause your own household rebelled against you I will give your wives to another man before your very eyes and he will go to bed with them in public view you did it in secret but I will make this happen to you openly in the sight of all Israel whoa Wow that's some of the consequences I'm gonna get to that in a moment listen listen to this threefold speech by Nathan he says first of all in verses 7 and 8 look at what God did for you see sometimes sin doesn't make sense I don't know how stupid I can be when I look at all that God has done for me you understand I'm saying spin done here makes it look at what God did for you and then look at what you did in spite of all that God has done for you and now here's part 3 and this was gonna happen as a result all this gray go down because of what you did and you did it in spite of what God did what did God do look at verse 7 and 8 again look at what God did he did four things for you first of all he gave you promotion he gave you a position the Lord says I anointed you to be king of Israel that's a position look at the position I've given you look at where I place you I have blown your mind God took David from being a shepherd he this man wasn't even he didn't have to work his way up he didn't become the mayor of Israel he didn't have to go to work his way through Congress and none of that he went from being a shepherd to the king of Israel he says look at this position and power but I bless you beyond your wildest dreams you have no background for the position I put you in and I have established you and if you pay attention to the Bible most prominent people in scripture only got tempted after they got elevated sexual temptation actually accompanies elevation so get ready you want the promotion can you handle the temptation then he says not only did I do that I didn't just give you promotion and position I also gave you protection look at the rest of verse 7 he says I also saved you from the power saw you remodel town Saul was trying to kill you it's trying to destroy your life I protected you from death I protected you I promoted you I gave you position then I gave you privilege I gave you privilege and and and in Washington in the next verse he says I gave you all of his wives here's the prestige and the privilege of being the king you got a hair them all around you with of me all of your needs should have been taken care of sexually anyway because you got options I provided all of this for you and I gave you possessions I gave you the kingdoms of Israel and Judah I gave you all as I gave you position I gave you protection I gave you prominence I gave you prestige I gave you possessions I'm giving you all that and then he says if that had not been enough I would have given you much much more which is hard to question say it's hard to quantify how much sin cost us because we don't know what's missing because we didn't measure up okay let me bring this to y'all forget about David for a second if there's anybody here and I know this is the Word of God buzz I ensure CH this weekend if there's anybody listen to me online or in this room or anywhere you are right now and you're being tempted to cheat on your spouse you're being tempted across the line you're being tempted to do something that's going to blow it let me let you in on a little secret you need to look through air thing God has already done for you I'm gonna ask you what kind of position oh y'all ain't ready for me what kind of position has he given you what kind of position has he put you in what kind of some of you have gone further than anybody ever in your family anybody in your family ever went this far anybody your family ever gone this high and you about to blow down over some booty yeah I'm ready for y'all now what position has he given you what protection is he giving you what has he protected you from God has protected some of y'all all your life you walked away from class at this you walked out of nightclubs when you should have been killed you have overcome diabetes and hypertension and other diseases that are taking your family down and God has protected you giving you privilege and prominence giving you possessions you about to lose your house lose your car lose your job lose your family lose your reputation just push them I say it ain't worth it [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] he says I gave you all that and you did them sometimes send-up makes sense when you think about what it puts at risk and will since I got tempted and the temptation puts all this at risk what we're resisting the temptation protect that's something to keep in mind then look at the next thing he says look what you did he doesn't just say the David killed Uriah set your eye up and that he stole your wife he says what you did you violated the word of the Lord see this is where everybody who keeps trying to justify what you did I'm saying measure what you did up to the word of the Lord you keep saying man if it was her man you know if I was married to a better wife if I had a better husband you yeah I'm saying put online up against the word or Lord nine up against your friend Bubba and your friend Keisha and what they think and with how you made how you may be able to justify it and excuse it because you have all these reasons behind it I'm saying what is the word of the Lord say about what you've done then watch this here the consequences the so listen every you you let a you can your I killed with the sword of the ammonites now the swords never going to leave your house there'll be violence in your own house that's what it says in verse 10 then he says in verse 11 because you did this your own households going rebelled against you somebody's gonna sleep with your wives in public in fact when you go down verse 14 he says also you're gonna you're gonna lose your child your child is gonna die because it is all those consequences those are the consequences the consequences their game okay I had a point the exposure the consequences I only know that's my second point I'm just making it a the consequence I don't know the order I gave to you what's the order what's my next point let me just say so I want to follow this order the confession here it is the confession I'll do that verse 13 here's what David says in verse 13 I have sinned against the Lord that's the first time he have acknowledged what he done I have sinned against the Lord the Bible says in first John 1:9 if we confess our sins he is faithful and just to forgive us of our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness the word confess in the Greek language comes from two words that are put together two words together is homolog a homo being insane Leggero means word is where we get the word logos from when you confess sin to God it means you're saying the same word he says about what you did confession means I agree with God about what I've done confession is an agreement you're right I'm wrong too many people have made excuses about their sin and you call it something else you keep calling it a mistake you keep calling the indiscretion or whatever you want to call it too just to make it soft in fact an affair is a soft word I shouldn't have named it affair but people are comfortable with it an affair is an event you go to but we like language like that because it softens it it doesn't sound like a violation it doesn't sound destructive and Trust destroying it doesn't sound like something that could tear a family apart I'm going to an affair I had an affair you can send out RSVPs for an affair home Leggero says I don't call it an affair it was sin God not that you don't try to see it's not that you don't try to explain why you did it you can explain it this is how I got where I got but never try to excuse it there's a grace from God that could be released over your life when you first of all say what God said about what you did I agree with you about what I've done and watch this watch this watch this so we move from the exposure to the confession to what I call the weight most people talk about infidelity don't talk about what I call this waiting period and watch what happens in verse 14 he's told that child's gonna die Nathan leaves in verse 15 and immediately the Lord strikes the child with a severe illness a deadly illness and watch this and it's not it's a child of David and who I mean you're right first of all understand this Uriah has been dead almost a year dead long enough for her to go all the way through her pregnancy deliver a baby then they got a baby together and the Bible still says that's your Ryan's wife you still with his wife that's deep right there God ain't playing I know how y'all got together see what I love about God is he knows see he can see us walking down the street and we got our family anything but he knows how it all came together when that when that rich man took that that poor man's lamb and cooked it for the guests the guests didn't know where the food came from all the guest knows is I mean lamb went even later on when David his son Solomon and Bathsheba will walk through the neighborhood as the royal family and paparazzi would take pictures of them they all look nice but God know how I came together god knows where the lamb came from see you might be in a relationship right now and y'all look off but God knows how I came together he knows who got cheated on he knows we got a lot on he knows who got hurt he knows keep it up so watch what David does in verse 16 he hears his swore not gonna leave your house somebody's gonna have sex with all your wives out in public and the child is gonna die and there's one thing he's fighting for he begged God to spare the child he went without food he's laying on the ground he's royal he's a king he's laid out on the ground praying God please don't take the child cuz let me take something I don't care how much a person cheese there's always one thing they don't want to lose I mean he probably don't wanna he don't want to have violence in his house and he don't want to have all that stuff happening but let me tell you something this most people don't want to lose their kids over this even though I put it all at risk by my behavior I don't wanna lose it so he's praying and pleading with God God please don't take the kids he's faster even his staff in verse 17 the same man you need to get up you need to go get something tickets he said nah he refused them he's saying he's just laid out he wouldn't eat he says God please don't do this cuz you know what he's he's in the waiting period most people don't talk about this I write about it for a couple of chapters in the book people don't know what it's like when you've been caught you're in a waiting mode he's just waiting he's just waiting to see how bad it's gonna be who's gonna snitch what am I gonna lose how bad is it gonna get how much will be exposed will they find out everything where they find out how they're gonna find out I hear we had a baby get ready fine now when he found out I had her husband ambushed how much gonna come out who's gonna know when I lose my child I lose my job where am I gonna lose see you how to control now you have no control everything is in somebody else's hand you gotta hope people will be merciful you understand it's a very disturbing time when you're sitting there waiting on sentencing you're like a you're like a person charged with a crime and you're sitting in the courtroom waiting on sentencing will the judge be merciful I'm praying it ain't as bad as they say it might be y'all I'm feel me here today it ain't no freakin goin on now ain't no sneaking going on now ain't no meet me every meet me at the club is going down ain't none of that going on now it's sentencing time and the consequences are rolling in and how much will my sin cost me how much with us how much more I'm sayin cost me and so what do you do what do you do in the waiting period when you're waiting on the consequences what do you do when you're waiting you know what you do you rebuild your life you rebuild your life how do you do that you find out how you got there what troubles me about people who have been unfaithful is they don't pay attention how they got there they don't study the pattern the pathology of infidelity there's a pathology to all sin all sin you could follow this path and eget its practice these three letters t be our trigger leads to behavior bringing on results y'all still with me how does it work all behavior has an emotional origin the problem is we become so impulsive we don't recognize the emotion that triggered it we just react that's a habit we don't even pay attention to what we're feeling and the results are this behavior makes this pain go away it could be your pain of rejection under appreciation loneliness whatever it is so I feel this I do this and the results are when I do this it makes this go away temporarily and then when this comes back again I do this again so the results are I don't have to feel this so intensely do you understand what I'm saying do I need to turn this around for y'all this is a pattern you have to pay attention to what it's because because once I understand the pattern now I can change this which you changes you change the behavior see this is what mess people up people wonder why am I still even after I got in trouble for committing adultery why do I still want to do it the reason why you still want to do it you still feel the same stuff used to feel what you have to introduce this new behavior that brings about the same results that treat some of the feelings that you have for example in my situation one of my problems was four years all I did was Church at home that was my life I did Church work and work with my family that was it I had no balance in my life I didn't have a social or pleasurable life so when I was introduced to something pleasurable I was like wow that sure feels good well now I have a whole lot of pleasure in my life that's healthy like I go to games you're gonna see me out having a good time I'll play Monopoly I play cars I do all that stuff now so that I have a balanced life if you watch a person and all they do is work and family working family working family they are freaky it's just or they going drink you can do something you gotta have something else in your life that I'm a way to 115 to say it like I really want to say it cuz I know y'all get up this early you really know the Lord really well you rebuild your life because it's possible to change in fact in fact I don't know what David was doing but when I look at chapter 4 I mean the next book so you go over a few chapters and go to first Kings chapter 1 and first Kings chapter 1 now you understand it wasn't a young man when this happened David was in his 60s when this happened okay I've given you these stats before the highest rate of infidelity amongst women is in their 60s the highest rate of infidelity amongst men is in their 70s and it remains high into their 80s just because there's snow on the roof don't mean it ain't fire on the furnace I don't know the stats right it may be just people are being more honest at this yeah I did it when you're 60 only care about getting caught yes his name was dates Ron he 19 I was about to say something but I don't have any idea what I was about to say what point am I on the weight right so so a David that's right David was 65 when he did it the Bible says the first Kings chapter one that when he was very old so he's older now go to verse one King David was now very oh and no matter how many blankets covered him he could not keep warm so that's what they did his visors told him let us find a young version and wait on you and look after you my lord she will lie in your arms and keep you warm so they searched throughout the Land of Israel for a beautiful girl and they found Abishag from shooting them and brought her to the king she's supposed to keep him warm y'all know what's gonna go down so the girl was very beautiful and she looked after the King and took care of him but the King had no sexual relations with her and I don't know if that's because he was old or because he had grown let me tell you something let me tell you somebody wonder somebody there's a study out of University of Denver and is called serial cheating the big question is will a cheat repeat and the answer is yes typically anybody who's cheated is three times more likely to cheat again if they've already done it in fact anybody has been cheated on is two to four times likely to be cheated on again is cyclical there's only four things that can stop a person from cheating again if these four things are not in place you should be very concerned about your relationship only four things can I tell you I'll tell you next week in part to see here the four things these four things if you don't have these four things in place you're gonna do it again or you're going to have it done to you again here's the first one the first one is there must be an admission the person who was unfaithful has got to admit it they've got to tell they've got to say something to somebody to say I've been wrong they have to be they have to confess it and they can't call it something other than sin it's got to be sin I send young zalazane because anybody who can justify it can easily repeat it the second thing there must be is accountability when you've had somebody be unfaithful to you they had to be accountable to you and to other people I have to be accountable to my wife and to spiritual authority in my life I don't get to make the rules if I break the rules like you don't get to say what you're gonna do there must be complete access to all digital information now no pass codes no hiding any by the way any time a person's phone any time a man's phone is face down face down man down any man can't leave his phone face up yeah that's just a how do you see the brothers looking at me right now this there must be accountability you gotta be willing to say where you are and not just call FaceTime hey honey I'm at church I'm at the eight o'clock services I see this really look at was we live here you can't lose phone service you can't say your phone went dead none of that's gonna work ever again ever accountability here's the third word is the word ambit's I just needed another word to start it with an A how many know what an ambit is an ambit is a boundary Ambus are boundaries there must be something protecting you from the person you were unfaithful with you can't have access to each other that's very important you may have to change your phone number how you going at it how you been cheating you cheated five times how you still got the same number hey my man you know I do landscaping man I need people we try and reach me man you know I do construction are you serious the last thing you need is somebody contacting you that you were unfaithful with while you're trying to rebuild trust he's trying to rebuild trust and and everybody still got your number like you got it you got to make it a little difficult for there to be contact I understand I'm saying and here's the final thing amendments I just talked about them if a person hasn't discovered a healthier way to express their emotional pain at least a sexual misbehavior then they're liable to repeat it you got to find other things in life that satisfy you let me hurry up cuz I got I got it some more points and I'm almost done so we see the exposure we talked about the confession we talked about the waiting period we run through the consequences really quickly in verse 18 here's the consequences then on the seventh day the child died Davis advisers were afraid to tell him he wouldn't listen to reason when the child was ill what drastic thing will he do when he we tell them the child is dead when Davis saw they were whisper and he realized what had happened is a child daddy acts yes they replied he is dead the wages of sin is death something's gonna die somebody might die turns on who you messing with you might there may be the death of trust in your relationship the death of respect from your children the loss of a home the loss of a job the loss of a career something's gonna die and what watch this what dies is never worth whatever you got from the relationship Yin staying there in Davis life he had three sons died behind this not only this child died we did another Sunday Amidon an older son named Amnon who was killed by his other son named Absalom and Absalom killed Amnon because Amnon raped his sister Tamar and because David didn't do anything about it Absalom killed Amnon so now he's got two sons that I did then Absalon ended up being killed by Joab and and some other soldiers because Absalom had lost so much respect for David for not doing anything about Tamar's rape that Absalom disrespected David he was the one that had sex with Dave his wives in front everybody he set a tent up on a roof he said a tent up on a roof so that publicly everybody could see him having sex with his father's wives then he tried to kill his father and usurp his throne from him and somebody killed Absalom so he lost three sons two women were raped and not only did you riot get killed but other soldiers got killed who were also ambushed David had them thrown set up in an ambush and in other people all that bloodshed all that loss of life all that tragedy over a fling that started with an Old Testament version of pornography if you think for nagas vain dangers this is the closest thing you get to pornography all of this started with a man watching a naked woman take a bath you it may seem innocent for you to be playing with yourself in the basement the problem is how far is there gonna go when will virtual not be enough because as soon as you get the power and the opportunity you might throw it all the way see all the brothers are here they know I'm telling the truth I don't know very buddy norm times you put every man in here no I'm tasting they might M same in that man telling the truth in there but they can't say the whole thing cuz why would you meanie tell the truth what you got to say so you know they're gonna say when he serves it was I but I'm your uncle me last thing I'm done I want to say more but I wanna so David David David gets up he washed himself he put lotion on he goes to worship God and the staff is confused in verse 21 they say we confused you were all sad and depressed when this child was sick now the child is dead you were mourning when he was living none I was dead now your worship and then you're eating again we don't understand that and David says well I did it because while the child was ill I was thinking perhaps maybe God will spare the child but now that he's gone I can't go he can't come back and I can't go to him and and what David is showing us is a very powerful lesson about mourning that child was terminally ill for seven days he was suffering and whenever somebody you love is suffering when they die that's a relief for them some people that are suffering are ready to die they ready to go home to be with the Lord my mother taught me this years ago she said son we got it back which is in the Bible people mourn when people when babies were born it's in the book of Job it says a man that is born of a woman is of a few days and full of trouble because they entered in a world of sin and darkness it was a sad thing to see a child born into this life and then God says but i but but but blessed precious in the sight of Lord is the death of his Saints so God rejoices when his saints come home and there was sorrow when people were born we got it backwards we have baby showers and reveals showers and all that we celebrate death we celebrate birth and and and can't get over dead that's backwards that ain't biblical when somebody does this say dies we should rejoice that they are absent from the body and present with the Lord when the baby is born in this world we need to say lord help us to guide this child in the right way is danger all around they getting shot in schools now we don't know what's going to happen we thank you for the gift but we really need you to cover the young Sam st. people leave here and they same stop stop falling apart you think that's a blessing to leave here and you suffer anyway let me go to this and verse 24 it swelling a close then David comforted Bathsheba what this is the first time that God says she's your wife now after he confessed he's dealt with some of the consequences not all of them because some consequences that pending that pending ominous potential consequence can plague you for years like when is it gonna all come out right the Bible says God says then you can comfort your wife the first time he calls Bathsheba's wife and watch this and he slept with her she became pregnant and gave birth to a son and Davis David named him Solomon and watch this the Lord loved the child in fact God sent word through Nathan the Prophet that they should name him Jedediah which means beloved of the Lord as the Lord of command that's that's the final net point the grace this is what I call grace in a strange place the same God that knew how this all got hooked up the same God that knows when Solomon and Bathsheba and David walked down the streets of Jerusalem as a royal family and he knows how all he knows all the mess behind it he said God is saying now that's your wife I came to preach to somebody today and let you know you don't have to be guilty and shameful about the situation anymore if you've done it you've done it go on with your life enjoy your life enjoy your life that show wife that's your husband you have to live in shame and guilt it's happened and not only does God forgive you if you commit now watch this if you confess it don't try to act like it wasn't sin call it with God called it don't try to act like it wasn't luck you know I just married the wrong person first time call it what it was it was sin it was selfish but once God forgives you he doesn't bring it up again that's your wife now going with your life live your life enjoy your life and God's Way and God loves the fruit that's coming out of this relationship I feel like somebody needed that was my part of my assignment is that to release somebody who's feeling shamed about how it all came together because let me let me let you in a little secret there is nobody in this room listening to me right now who doesn't need and hasn't needed the forgiveness of God for something if you know it that's true look to somebody next you say that's true of me Amen that's true of me I ain't got time to tell you all he's forgiving me for and what he's forgiving me for I may have done worse than you I may not have done worse than you but all of us have needed the grace and mercy and forgive all of us had needed the blood of Jesus over life so guess what admit it and receive it at many was sin receive His grace and go on with your life I'm so glad that my sin is never greater than his grace oooh cuz we're sin about grace does much more abound but there's no need for grace when sin is absent you got to admit it he only releases grace all sin you see them saying you don't get grace relief so you admit you wrong you keep trying to justify it you right and you still stuck I sinned thank you for your grace so I can keep moving stand up we overtime I'm sorry hmm where's pastor Larry I wanna make sure so we got come here come in so I could see cuz I don't know how to close the service properly properly so i'ma try to do this so if your first time guests come up in and you shall we take you to that experience and if you want prayer right we got somebody gonna be up here you if you want pray out the service and and I think you got to leave that way when we just late you gotta leave that way how am i doing I'm trying through what opposed to do amen amen amen all right I said VIP you're doing too much Thank You Amen let's pray father thank you for your word thank you for your grace thank you for your love thank you that our sin is never greater than your grace thank you for your goodness and now Lord we don't want to take this lightly and use this as an excuse to quit our marriage and take somebody spouse from them help us wherever we are right now to be faithful to not cheat no matter how difficult it is no matter how tempting it is help us to stay faithful to not forfeit all you've given us and to be faithful we're sorry for every mistake every error we've made in thought some of us haven't crossed a line physically but emotionally and mentally we've been there for years bring us back calls us to repent and cause us to connect with our spouses and maybe even cause us to sign up for the effective love marriage workshop on July 13th if passed the battles going to help us work on our marriage and we can sign up in the lobby today as he makes announcements during the prayer and they can also come on July 10th on Wednesday night from 7:00 and 9:00 if they can't make Saturday because that's another announcement and they don't have to go online they could walk right out in the lobby and sign up today and a 60 dollar investment can help transform their marriage forever so I pray that people will invest in their marriages and invest in their relationship with you in Jesus name Amen so if you want to register for the effective love marriage workshop thank you so much for joining us today we really hope that you enjoyed today's message so listen if you would like to help us reach more people just like you and I would like to encourage you to click the gear button at the top of your screen also please note that past sermons are made readily available online for your viewing pleasure and we hope that through our ministry you're able to experience God be engaged in community to equip the ministry and empower to serve we'll see you next time

Channel: Keith Battle

Views: 8,054

Rating: 4.8965516 out of 5

Keywords: infidelity, affairs, love, relationships, marriage, God, Jesus, sermon, Christian Church, Zion Church, DMV, Keith Battle, Pastor Keith Battle, Pastor Battle, side chickology, recovering from infidelity, cheating, cheating on your spouse, after the affair

Id: CBWlXSCs2Lw

Length: 50min 3sec (3003 seconds)

Published: Mon Jun 03 2019