8 Rules of Engagement When Dating A Man!

hey hey Tony guys is here poppin in coming to you off top of the dome today you know one touch on this hair topic this this might be a 10 part series I have to do now understanding men and what know about men how to deal with men our lady wrote me and I saw the message and it was talking about something she didn't understand about men it was it had to deal with men pushing women all the way to the edge to test them you know to see if they could respect that woman and women you know having to learn men and trust men and women want in love and women testing men and it's a lot that does not make sense and I want you to understand that the first thing you have to understand is that you will never understand a man in vice-versa what we have to understand as separate different genders is that we will never fully understand the opposite sex it's just impossible to fully understand so what you have to do is love and respect which means you may not fully understand but you love and respect but this what you have to realize as a woman when it comes to dealing with a man now understand this think about the nature of a man think about things men do think about things that men are called to do in the world when they go to the army what they have to do in the army think about that what they're doing as a sniper think about men MMA fighters think about men plan on boxing think about me and playing football think about men hunting think about the things that men do think about this now and I think a lot of times we don't really look into the nuances of a human being and we don't evaluate the human being to truly understand what the human being is doing or going through we don't really process it just like men don't process that women have a whole nother human brewing inside of them for ten months and then pushes that whole human out pushes a 21 22 inch baby out that weighs ten pounds through a little hole in the body that is made for a look but something that's a fraction of the size of a baby you see what I mean like a lot of time we just don't process what the opposite sex goes through and what they do and how they live and how they think we're not processing and that's what I want you to do here is really think about as a woman just take some time and sit down and just look at the life of a man and look at the things that he does in his life the things that turn him on the things that bring him joy the things that make him exciting and just process this being that you're trying to understand and that's what you have to realize is that man we don't make sense to men men don't make sense to man definitely gonna make sense to a woman as a man we look at another man and like I don't know how he did that ion's man how he did that I don't understand why he did that I don't know what this man was thinking I don't know what this man what in the room that's how men look at other men like but that's the dumbest thing you could do Wow that's like no man in the world no man in the world can understand how jay-z cheated on Beyonce no man could wrap their head around that you know no man in the world can wrap their head around what some men who are everyday professionals have done to another human being today girlfriend today wife today daughter to the son to the elderly lady like men do some things that make other men just shake the head like wow so what I need you to understand is that this is less about understanding of man and more about understanding yourself and who you need to be as a woman with this man because the longer you trying to completely understand a man you're gonna be failing so now rule number one which it might be rule number two if rule number two now some of these rules I might say the same number over cuz I'm not reading off piece of paper number one you'll never understand a man number two you can't believe nothing a man say till you see it with your own eyes you can't believe nothing a man says nothing anything come out his mouth that's one of the biggest mistakes I hear women say when I'm coaching women on the phone and I'm coaching and they said well what he said that he loves God and that he really desire to live for God and what he said that you know she cheated on him and she punched him in the nose and that's why he left her well he said he doesn't like her he doesn't even care for her he really loves me and I hear women repeat what a man said and they actually believe it listen 90% of what come out of me and mouth is exaggeration it's a lie until he come to a certain point in his life it's the exaggeration so you cannot believe what a man men don't even listen to me man don't even listen to me when me and talking it's like that if a man talking when I'm talking to man this is what he see that's what do you see when a man talking to me that's what I see yes I got a quote that say I can't hear you show me what you're talking about that's that's you write this down now you need a journal you need a notebook no one you will never fully understand a man okay number two don't believe nothing man says until you see it with your eyes he said he made six figures he don't make six figures till you see a pay stub that multiply it by 52 or multiply it by 26 equal six figures however frequently he get paid till you see a pay stub or a direct deposit he don't make six figures he said his mom a little with him until you pull up the title on the house deed on the house whatever and see it in his name and here's his mama tell you she living with him he lived with his mama you know saying you cannot just be believing when you're dealing with a man you got to see you got to see and I know somebody said well didn't you have trust in a relationship yeah you have you trust God trust God you tell me anyway in the Word of God way to tell you to trust me and trust God trust God let man show and prove that's why when you go on to the court of law you have to prove beyond a reasonable doubt you gotta prove you got the show and you have to prove because man cannot be trusted and they could go for women too but what I'm talking how you understand a man cuz I'm a man so this let me tell you now and that's what y'all get hurt at is you believe what a man says about his feelings for you about his feelings or dealings with another woman you believe it and that's how you get hurt now number three never come over number three number three years when you're dealing with a man you have to know who you are you gotta know who you are so you could write this down number three know who you are and what you want and this what I mean by this is you can't be going with the flow with a man if you're going with the flow you're gonna end up in the Riptide you're gonna end up in rip current and and I in deep drowning if you're going with the flow with a man you have to have a plan for you you don't want to live in Wyoming you need to know you don't want to live in Wyoming you want to live in Atlanta you want to live in Orlando you want to live in Los Angeles you you want a three-bedroom house you need to know you need three bedroom house that you want a three bedroom house with two baths otherwise you're gonna be living in a mobile trailer you're gonna be living in an RV touring the tour in the country while he playing in the band $400 a night at the love jazz clubs you need to know what you want you want two kids you need to know that you want two kids otherwise you're gonna end up with six you need to know that you want to get all you need to know that you want no kids you have to know who you are when you're dealing with a man cuz he man fly-by-night with every whim I'd be little I listen to myself I listen myself I said man listen Tony you gonna start talking could you sounded crazy I listened myself I'll talk to my wife yesterday I said baby I want to open another business one old milk business like what you thinking like a lawn care service gym yoga studio internet cafe and why you looking at me like she said do you understand how much money you make sitting at home working from home she said how much money you think the internet cafe made last month in the middle of Kovach now she said in her accent I'm saying in my accent but I said she said it was shut down she said you got a business that keep on going regardless of what's going on in the world you still could work you still gonna living she said the man who owned the gym will trade places with you in a heartbeat I said hmm I said hmm see if my wife didn't know who she was and what she want we'll have what we'll have a barber shop that's out of business that would've been out of business for the last three months we'd had an internet cafe that have been out of business for the last three months and we paying rent on weed we'd have had a yoga studio or a fitness studio no yoga I know y'all go oh yeah spirit fitness to do that have been out of business for the last three months that we've hand rent on rat and I got an office space downtown and the people making me pay rent on cane going office they got all kind of co Viet running up in office they emailing us two times Oh got another case oh-eight nother case go no Canyon going office with no clear conscience any but they still make you pay rent still make pay rent one days one of the company's industrious is called industrious they got offices around around the country making you pay rent won't let break the lease ain't been in the office ain't been an office in three or four months and you rent $3,000 a month ain't let's tell my wife she gave me that she's on McGee this you want a corporate office you wanna headquarter for my mentor not like you you want someone to work from you ain't gonna feel like getting up in the morning driving downtown find a parking and going in that office when you got a home office ain't listening that's woman you got to know who you are and you gotta know what you want otherwise men will have you up the creek without a paddle we'll have you in every harebrained scheme because that's how a brain work we want to do this we want to do this we want to do this we want to do this we dream so big we fantasize so big as men we want to do everything we live that's why you see yo yo president file bankruptcy mo time then you got fingers on your hands and became the president and they've been bankrupt that ought to be a rule if you ever been bankrupt you can't run no country that ought to be a rule yeah lucky changing draw not that's what I need you to understand so that's how men are on average we tell them I don't have it now you guys session to the rule so I'm like man if my wife didn't have a backbone what end was afraid to speak her mind I have us in so much debt we've been bankrupt so many time we have been sleeping outside we lost everything because that's how the mind don't mean no harm by don't mean no harm just just that's how men are we just fly by night we leaf in the wind that's why that's why God created a woman because he didn't he if we didn't have women in the world the world would be on stilts with rocket boosters on it their house stilts trying to stick the stilts in the galaxy but how rocket boosters trying to make it go further it Darrell to be bouncing like a basketball still spinning on axis and we have women in the world I mean everything be cause I have guns lined up down it the way you just could drive or just shoot people as you drive down the road it door if we have women in the world you just get it anybody everything will be legal so I'm gonna cut you off you won't take their life legal if women want in the world that's what you got to understand know who you are now listen number four and then keep up with eating numbers enough I repeat a number I just understand this I'm coming off okay right here me and the holy spirit all right number four number four else you got to be tough with me you got to be strong what I mean you must be let's change this we'll say you must be assertive when you're dealing with a man you'll know gotta be no yo yes gotta be yes you cannot play no games if you show any weakness with a man you're gonna get toe up you're gonna get tore up you're gonna get told so when you don't want to do something when you don't say think something is a good idea when you realize that if you do that you're gonna be blind you closing your eyes to be blind and you following the blind and you're gonna end up in a ditch you got to speak your mind you got to speak your mind and you got to be strong with it on the flip side of this when this man doing something when he want to try you when he wanted yell at you when he want to curse at you when he want to come in late you got to be able to check him you got to be able to check him right away you got to be able to speak truth to power you got to let him know how you feeling what you thinking what's going on in your heart and listen you're gonna have to be you're gonna have to be let's let's make them fire be emotionally intelligent what this mean is you can't when you're dealing with a man you have to be cool calm and collected I'm gonna tell you what you need to do I'll tell you what you need to do what I need you to do is go watch like the documentary of Griselda Blanco cocaine Cowboys and watch on Queen of the South watch on you know shows like that right there they got a woman who's she'd the top of the food chain she had to assume the power she took the power and she she'd a clean pan watch that and watch watch her energy watch her energy watch the documentary of a great man like a Martin Luther King and look at Coretta Scott King and and watch her energy you know a woman who or a documentary of a man who was you know in a power position you know like dr. King but it could be even in the streets that that is not a good example cuz you not condone I am an illegal activity but watch the cool the calm the poised see as the one when you're dealing with a man men prey on insecurity me and prey on weakness that's why men with men that's why we'd be by the fight like it's always macho like if a man come out to my house and he coming to do some work he come to give me a quote I literally kind of got to check him I literally got to say hey come on come on now come on man give my honest price you came through the gate you roll pass all the houses you get up here you get to the I'm on the corner lot so my house the most expensive house on the on the road and you didn't trip with your prices come on bro come on Oh what do you mean we don't do that we don't we don't charge people by the prices sir come on I was born yesterday but I stayed up all night not what you know what you could do this for what's the real price and we literally got to go you know what you know I just I don't have them all right all right sir thank you for coming out by I get somebody else well I got to tell him on the phone listen for you come out here man bring a real price well I got a lot to him and tell him you know I'm calling him because I heard some review that you're very honest man I told a man at one time it shook him up so he came out here to fix some he charmed me $79 it really should have been like 250 he really would have charged 250 but because I hit him with what yeah guy told me about you now that was actually the truth he told me you're honest man he told me your most honest man he didn't see not after he came out a second time or third time not he won't start trying to double that price because he realized that first time when I hit him with that I throw him off guard so he gave me honest price $79 really should have been to 4249 oh so that's how me and are me and read ignorance if you ignorant or something like a man knows what he knows and when you know something think about anything that you know think about anything that you well-versed in if you work in HR if you work in admin whatever you do if you work in real estate if you work in real estate you can say a word and if I don't understand that word that you just said I don't pick up what you putting down give my up persons don't know nothing is it like I'm talking to you about publishing a book if I'm talking to you about publishing a book and I say Kindle direct publishing and you never heard of that now let me know that you don't know nothing about publishing I sent somebody I send people to word document and they'll say is this editable can you edit this I'm like wow they never typed on the computer they never typed on a word on Microsoft Word that they don't know that a word document can be edited but it it's nothing against them it's just that they've never done this so guess what when you in territory that you've never been in people can get over on you that's why I make all these videos because the world is suffering due to the gains me and play that why the world suffering and then on top of that some women start to adapt to the game and play their own games and now two wrongs don't make a right so as a woman you've got to be emotionally intelligent because if you crying all the time he's gonna eat you alive if you screaming and yelling all the time he's gonna eat you alive you got to be able to speak your mind without your voice trembling without your eyes watering without you having the screen without you having to curse you got to be able to tell him what you want what you need what you expect in a strong powerful voice you got to be able to say listen listen I'm telling you right now and I'm not gonna tell you again what you did is absolutely unacceptable and if that's what you up to I advise you to pack your stuff and leave today because if ever ever ever happens again I don't care if we got 10 kids I'm leaving that very moment and so if you don't care didn't tell me you don't care be a man and tell me that you don't care you got to be able to talk to him like that so he can feel you and then you got to be able to show it so you can't just be talking you're gonna have to be able to show it so your energy you're gonna have to shift that energy you're gonna have to let him know you need rolling out the red carpet you gonna have to let him know he got to show and prove he got to earn trust that his that your trust is earned it ain't just freely given that he got to be on point in order to get your trust that's what you got to realize and if you can be there then that's gonna help you a lot if you can get to that space now the rest of these ain't really numbers these kind of just nuances but if you want to write it down number six let me put number six on number six now you got to have you a face you got to have your face and what I mean by this is you got to have a look or you got to have a response that a man can sense that he can feel see the thing that a lot of people forget is that communication is 70% nonverbal so after I was talking my wife bought the business and stuff like that um I said something else last night it just was Tremec on it was it was done ain't he know what I said I can't remember what I said and she just like [Music] so on yeah so earlier today and she went on and say something and she looked back at me and then I looked at my life you just gonna ignore what I said and she was like what did you say what did you say Oh about that right there and she kind of had a little smirk but she literally just completely ignored me cuz she know what I was talking about with nonsense it was just another hairbrained idea she know it was nonsense so she has like and and that's where I learned this from that's why I wrote the book now I'm telling you if you ain't read this book you you miss and I don't did it what I'm trying to do in this video I can't really do it but I cook I put it in this here book this everything written in word so you got to understand talk to y'all top of my head with the Holy Spirit but I'm missing things you got to get this book the next I don't know what it calls twenty or twenty five dollar the next twenty or twenty-five dollars you get you need to read a woman's influence now my wife she got this thing to where if I say something and it don't really make sense oh it's crazy or she related with it she'd just be silent she don't go off she don't go off she'll make me feel stupid she don't say nothing she just be just that right there let me know alright that was dumb alright that was dumb idea alright yeah that was stupid yep the same time for that it just let me know just write down just write down what see again is tie-in to the emotional intelligence you got to hide your face because he a lot of women a man will say something and they'll let it change their their motor their rev up or they'll stall a lot and so yeah like a man of say something and the woman should get engaged with it oh my goodness here you go once again with another stupid idea honestly John how stupid can you be yesterday you just said that you want to open a chicken coop at the red light and I told you how stupid that was and now today York I'm talking about you want to do melted ice cream trucks oh my goodness and she get so into it that in this exchange she belittles him she demeans him she disrespects him so now she is attacking him and she's hurting his feelings she's breaking him down so what it's going to do is going to make him resent her and it's going to make him want to hurt her he's gonna want to cheat on her even if he never tells her and she never finds out he will be in another woman and just talk and he take this Diane you wanna talk about my ideas he'll never tell her she'll never find out but he doing it out of anger it's kind of like when you was a kid and your mama or your daddy or whoever raising you or your coach or whatever say something to you and they tell you to do something and it hurt your feelings or make you mad are you upset and when you walk away you mom it under your breath now air 90 and certain Mama's could hear you and you walking in right when you bout to turn that corner - what nice on mama they'll hear you same thing with you know in a relationship you will feel that and you want to get back and that's what you got to understand it's like you just you have to find your look you got to find your response mothers have it with children coaches have it with this athletes teachers have it with their students to where you right here you're not going here you're not going there you right here but it's your look is your your theme your response that's life [Music] what what is it what is that face for what does that face for that you always make that face what is that face for and then you got to have you well you know um you know let's think about that I mean really you know think about that let's let's go through the pros and cons and I'm gonna tell you sometimes when I do this and I and I present something to my wife and she go to talking and she go to take me through if not if she forget if she forget her tone could go into a sarcastic kind of demeaning tone and it'll make me get defensive but she very well very good with it with kind of keeping it and then what I do is I present the cons to because really that's just stream of consciousness and she have access to my stream of conscious because she's my wife so she my counsel I'm a therapist my life coach you know my confidante my board my team member you are everything right hand my left hand you know big toe look toe see me everything and so we like Pinky and the brain and so she have access to my stream of conscious and I'm able to like yeah you right now I'ma tell you it's a lot of time that I feel defeated and I feel like man why just ain't no dream with man just ain't no dream why I just don't have no vision man daddy raised her to be a doctor I'm ready I'm entrepreneur blocking my blessing man you know every time Aaron I didn't don't get on my shoulder and be with that but then when I really think about it I said you know what she right she right cuz I be starting stuff and I'd be tired of it in a month I don't like that's why I keep telling y'all hey I do lives Monday through Thursday ain't did it yeah because I do it on Monday I don't feel like doing it on Tuesday and if I do it on to don't feel like doing the only instinct I need me a day in between I don't like monotony own like routine if I wake up 5:00 a.m. this morning tomorrow gotta wake up 8:00 a.m. I wake up 8:00 a.m. the next morning I'm wake up 7:00 wake up 7 m1 I'm sleeping at 9:00 I don't like monotony I don't like routine and so I'm doing living my life that's why I try to post video at same time every day I can't do it I can't do it and so my wife she didn't learn that about me and so she able to tell me listen why are you gonna get an office cuz you're not the type to get up and do no nine if I go to that office every day don't you realize that's a prison sentence for a lot of people they hate that they'll trade places with you in a heartbeat and you want to go get an office but I've been talking about it for the last few years so she just said go ahead go ahead and so as a woman you got to have your look you got to have your face you got to have your thing your response that you don't cower in front of a man so and then when you give this give and take just like my wife let me get to office I earn enough to afford it so she let me get it and what she told me she was like well in the past you you wanted her office but we couldn't afford no office but now you can afford it you know you didn't build more businesses you didn't build different streams of income you can afford to pay for the office so even if you don't go or you don't use it like that I wanted to let you see what I was talking about but I couldn't let you see what I was talking about in the past because it would have hurt us financially now it won't necessarily break us or hurt us financially it's okay so I could afford to let you see what I was telling you and now I get it now I get it I'm Wow she was right so that's the balance right there that's where you got to understand that as a woman now what you have to realize now number seven is when you're dealing with a man you have to understand this what number seven understand the difference between forgiveness and foolishness when you're dealing with a man we're going to do something that's gonna need forgiveness and what what may happen here is it plays all the way back to knowing who you are and what you want because a man is gonna test you there's no if ands and buts about that I know y'all wanna I know I know you think that is stupid that a man that man test women it does not matter what you think about it he's going to test you it does not matter if he's the priest the Pope the president the pastor the principal it's a lot of power in the letter P ain't that something the power will stand for P and when I just name police principal president all them powerful positions start with a peace power in the P whew what a thing huh y'all know what y'all be talking about when they B's gonna power in the P okay power n P what I mean power in the people look at all the power in the peace not forgive me for that little rent right now but what I need you to understand is that you're gonna have to forgive him for something [Music] and a man is going to test you so this is the thing with me men always look for the easiest route me and always look for a shortcut me and always want easy man want fast money they want fast love they want fast money they want fast loving okay me and always looking for the shortcut so ideally it would be easiest for a man to have a main woman and to have a side woman or to have side women or to have multiple main women and each woman giving him something different it would be easiest for him in his mind that's one thing if he's that type of man the other side it would be easiest for a man to not work a real job and to pursue a fantasy I watch an American then you want Ninja Warrior man say he quit his job to train for the American Ninja Warrior you did what um I I just decided that I needed to quit my job and focus fully on becoming a ninja I said you did what sir you got a wife and children and you quit your job to train to be a ninja and then your butt get up there swinging around and I fell in the water so now y'all lights cut out and now you got your you got your woman doing all the work she busting her butt to pay the bills and you train to be a ninja sir that's a hobby sir that's for fun so you could train when you get off work but see that's how me and I'll do now this was a Caucasian man now on the other end up on the african-american side it's it's a lot of men don't want to work because he want to be a rapper don't want to work cuz he want to start a business and he ain't Smith and he ain't sniffles deceit in business management class any sniff nobody college any drove past the college but he want to start a business and at the expense of the woman working so see a man gonna test you because he's looking for that easier round now I'm talking from a man to a woman a lot of this stuff could go both ways but weed it's not a both ways video and that's what I need y'all to understand right now people always tell me I think oh boy hey video need to be focused and it got to go one way in order for the brain to stay on track hard for the brain stay on track we're just going one direction so I can't be going both ways so understand is this from a man about men prepare women point-blank period okay I understand that so I'm being a comment like a boy way I obviously said by me and women they're saying what the video about so not hit me this man is going to test you because he's looking for the easy route now another easy thing and it depends on what you can give as a woman and what's okay with you what you comfortable with my wife she does all the laundry I've asked her a baby gonna be helped lunch no no cuz I don't like the way you fold okay cool alright cool that make my life easier and she'll sit there and hate doing the laundry but will rather hate doing the laundry didn't let me do it that's my personal choice that's the type of woman she is she is a personality she like to do everything if I get up and go to the kitchen and try to cook she'll coming now let me do it let me get out way let me do it let me sure I have to let me do it okay Hey Hey if I go try to wash the dishes let me do it cuz you're gonna leave stuff on the plate and I'm gonna have to wash it behind you anyways what you Tom I know you don't know you don't last time you watch this I had to wash it out to you get out the way I do it just leave it there I will do it and so ok so guess what that made my life a lot easier but it's not that I'm opposed to doing those things I don't want to do those things but at the same time some men will try to find a easy route until he matures I had to mature now I had to mature and I see for me it would have been cheating and so for me my easy would have been cheating not not doing laundry or not doing dishes or not cooking or stuff like that that wouldn't be my easy my easy would have been being able to be a cheater being able to have no side because that's what I come from I was nasty and so in in doing in trying to get to that place when I first met my wife I was 21 years old so I was a grown boy in every sense of the word so what demand we'll do is just a little test okay let me see if I can control her like let me see if I can overly question her ask too many questions be kind of control and be kind of jealous so we're yeah so who you with how long you been there let me hit a voice uline uline anyway yeah I try to do my wife like that it was testing her to see if I was gonna be able to be controlled and guess what two months into the relationship she broke up with me we're gonna need to take a break that what she told me I ain't never held nothing back from we happen to cross paths six months later the relationship would have been old if it weren't for God God God brought us back together so we could do the work that we doing today so that we could write a woman's influence for you that's why that's why God brought us together so we could write a woman's influence to help say you your life help say your life point-blank period and so we came back together we to go I said let me see if I could yell at all get into a little disagreement go to yell try to yell you she said don't talk to me like that I said whoa okay alright okay let me test let me see if I could come in late hey I'll be home from hanging with the boys at midnight came in five o'clock in the morning not gonna do not on dope not gonna part met no no Elsa she asked if I mean when get up she hurt and she talked to me later she said listen you tell me you're gonna be to my place at a certain time if you don't come at that time you're not coming in don't ever tell me you're gonna be somewhere and not be there unless you did that's essentially what she told me I was like wow then I'll say okay let me see got Mario Merida nummy Tesla let me see if I could go back on my word told I was gonna leave the streets stop hustling let me see if I get back in these streets go to hustle now that we married and we got a child see if she trapped not went back to the street tried to hustle I was 23 still growing boy 23 years old boom she came home one day I was with red I was in a ponytail the answers was on she what contact the answer was on nose was nose was red holding a Bible I saw Lord and she been with a pastor been praying she been in prep me she's in the lead I tried to try to hold her she tried to lead i'm hold on please just talk to me just stop him she kept on kicking and pushing she let me go boom she love that's why I created a 72-hour rule it's in this book the 72-hour rule that's it is created in the first two months of my marriage when I try to go back to hustling try to go back to the streets and my wife loved and she was going for 72 hours and I said me too I changed my life because listen to what I'm telling you see that's what men do see this what every man does but not every man can articulate it so that you understand so I tested my wife in every area let me try to yeah a letter let me try to control her let me try to not keep my word come in late cuz he guess what if I could have controlled her when I was 21 that would've let me know I could I could steal her mind because what we was teaching each other the boys we was teaching each other from the oh jeez you don't want what's between a woman's legs you want once between her ears you want her mind because if you could get her mind you could control her and see most women give a man they're mine and you'd be never suicidal homicidal because you've given the man your mind so you cannot give a man your mind you can't let him control you can't let him have you worried and stressed and using reverse psychology on you can let him be pulling Jedi Mind Tricks making you think you crazy when you know use your intuition and you know your intuition ain't line see a man to take your mind and see I'm exposing myself and I use myself for example so that you know ain't bashing ain't bashing other men but I know this common amongst men and I know most women have lived through this if they honest about it and that's how I know what I'm talking about because I lived it so I tried to test her and this way I say on number seven you gonna have to know what you can and you can't forgive so you're gonna have to forgive something because he's not gonna be perfect just like you ain't gonna be perfect I had to forgive my wife for stuff too so humans not gonna be perfect but you got to know what your deal-breakers are so now that I punched my wife in the nose I would I would have never saw her again she wouldn't forget that had she walked in my apartment you know or walk into the apartment like say she's at work and I'm off that day has she come home early or pop in for lunch and I'm in now with another woman literally I would have never seen her again and and you know how I know that is because I tested her with small stuff I tested her with little stuff that I know was not a deal-breaker I tested her with little stuff that I know 99% of women would have overlooked they would have let it go just like the the young lady asked me on the live the other day Tony why do you feel this wrong to be able to draw a killer and then she clarified and she declare a fighter she said well where I'm from if from anything a man doing to make money it's fine like as long as he making money it's fine and guess what that's how a lot of feel it's like it's a lot of women of all races that's with a man that's cheating on his frightened taxes scamming credit cards stealing people identity Ponzi schemes drawer dealing all kinds of things that men doing to get money illegally and it's a woman beside him that's okay and my wife won with that my wife went with that I was not a kingpin moving pounds and pounds and pounds a day I was not a kingpin I make enough money and make a good little living pay some bills and she wasn't with it she said look you're gonna get money on us or we ain't gonna be together point-blank period I don't care that we marry on care that we got a son I will divorce you and I'll put your own child support she didn't say that with her mouth she showed me with her actions so right here now what I'm telling you on number seven is you're gonna have to be able to forgive but you got to know what your deal-breakers are so see you getting punched in the nose and you forgiving that you walking in and catching your man sleeping with another woman and you forgiving that no mmm that's see that's why I say know the difference between forgiveness and foolishness because when it's like little when it's antecedent behavior like the the precursor that's what a man is gonna do a man just ain't gonna be dating you and punch you in the know he's first going to yell at you then he's going to curse at you then he's going to grab you then he's going to push you then he's going to choke you then he's going to punch you in the nose you see what I mean so if you stop him when he yells at you now he knows he can never get to the point where he puts a fish on your nose because he can't even raise his voice so he can't even properly angry with you so when I'm dealing with my wife I gotta talk just like this because I know that no matter what I'm feeling what I'm thinking what I'm upset about if I go into any other tone than this conversation over I also know that if I try to grab her hold her restrain her she'll fight to the death to get loose and she'll call the police if I know she'll fight to the death to get loose and I know that because that very first 23 years old when I went to back to the streets to hustling and she went to leave and I tried to hold on so I'm hanging on an ankle trying gettin draw across the littoral and flow we hang on furniture so I ain't had to worry about no coffee table at night and hold on don't go nowhere and she'll fight to the death so that let me know if this woman gonna stay and sit down and talk with me because she didn't made up her mind it's a headstrong woman I go any further than what I'm doing right now trying to hold on and getting drunk from to the carpet I go any further than this right here then the boys in blue gonna be over here and I'm gonna begin tazed up give me and so that let me know that's what you have to understand so know what you can forgive but you got to know then we've done precursors that the antecedent behavior so that when it had the little things he does to test you when he say I'm gonna call you at 9:00 p.m. tonight when I get home when I get off work and then I go to the gym get home when I eat on the shower I'm gonna call you by 9:00 you don't get no call if you don't nip that all the way in the book the next day guess what now he knows so that time when I came in father you had my wife not checked me on that and let me know I was all the way wrong and don't ever do that again guess what now I was out with the boys legitimately I was not eating I was out with the boys legitimately and we had just started dating we had got back together you know after the first two or three months and I had a little troupe called dazzling diamonds and it was a group of eight women and guys called the organized pimping but I wasn't really pimping it was just they were going to club and twerk and it would get tips and I keep my I get the tips off the ground me and my homeboy would pick up the tips and get him they cut and I get my cut so yeah I was like done yeah I was like done I was entrepreneur it was my homeboy idea gave me the idea well that night one of my top dazzling diamonds I named it dasn't done one of my top down and dying I had took her to the hotel to meet up with a guy that was a you know celebrity and they decided no door was open now I'm sitting down I don't thing he did and I Tyler there was enough sleeping but yeah my life all my life I got done and at that time I had well hustling a little bit so I'm a wife I was in the streets hustling and I was and I had two dads and dimes and so when she first took me back she she gave me by the mono soul the kind of weed things out cuz that's what I got into after than when she left me when she loved me that thing just blew me cuz I had never met a woman that would that had left me I had never been broke up with by Norman I had never been left by a woman that thing sent me on a downward spiral that's when I started to Desmond Don that's when I got back went into hustling in the streets serving hard all that in so that's why I was that night no guess what my wife been okay with that she was my girlfriend that time any product was we probably wouldn't even a month in but has she been okay with that then that would have told me I could stay out all night cheating see I wasn't eating that night but has she been okay with that had I worn that one right down I probably was our pride was 22 at the time I think yeah I probably 22 so still young and dawn and trying to find myself lost lost in the sauce but she came what she did was she had a time line up that's not money you got to have a time line everything my wife went perfect you know she was she was 20 years old she was she was 19 and then she turned 20 while I'm 22 so we two and a half years apart I think about - I don't know with two years or 25 years apart so she went perfect you got to understand she was 19 years old that's why that's why I'm saying you don't have no excuses at 30 35 40 45 50 55 60 you need to get this thing together so when I be giving you all examples some women try to use that again oh well yeah why yo I put up with you for a little bit yeah why I took you add yeah she was 19 she no none I was her first real real relationship you didn't saying I was the first on a whole lot of thing and so just what is coming from so don't look at that oh well she did that three guys in there that she wrote a woman influence so let me let my man sell him draw she let me do that what she did is she had a time line in her head I ain't know it and so what it was it's no may have a time line what I mean by this is you got to know when you got to go you get this man some time to grow so when I first was in the streets when I got back with her [ __ ] I was already in the streets so she saw that she saw it she watched it on her roommate you know they was dead a little bit they saw more clientele they they were kind of you know right there hands-on seeing what I was doing but she later told me that she knew I could be her husband and that she knew that she felt something from God about me and she knew what she wasn't with but she couldn't just change me overnight couldn't just put her foot down like him get out the streets you gotta leave Street but after a little bit I don't know about a month mmm two months so I have to look good she say you're gonna have to UM not call with him thousand dimes she went with me on one of our trips you know desert dotted with VIP eye candy she went she went to the club with us we drove my daddy Lexus is250 so it's a little small Lexus I had 4,000 on they were going with me so they had to lap up in the back they were mad one on with fuming shoot she's sitting in the front seat we back hitting somebody walk my wife was in the front seat she's my girlfriend and thousand dollars in the back seat and we went to the club they was in VIP all I was in VIP and why would them she immersed herself in the life that I was living at that time so she'd get a hook semen so she could assess the situation then she told me it went long that was the only run that we had that was an only gig we had and it was for NBA player and a pro boxer you know who invited me told me a brain brain dead and dying that was the only gig my wife let me have when we got back to got back together after that there was a dissolution of the desert diamonds I had to break the news that yes ladies on I've met McQueen and so we will be closing the doors a dozen times I know this may come to a shock to you at this time but there's no foreign severance pay for one case will have to be cut sharp and we will be closing the doors a lot of dazzling times you could keep your uniforms because they had tank talk with dinner on it said down the diamond they had a glitter number on the back and so yeah he was an organization night night it was no real company we had a 401k no health benefits and done like that but you're not over 22 years old and I had a way with the ladies and and talking to the latest and that's what my homeboy told me they do this so my wife she had that time line so when she told me that pooling you got to go I said all right I'll say okay that's counsel and she told me you got to get out of streets to say you can't be hustling because we build a life together we're gonna get my kids I refuse to be with somebody that I'm gonna lose to the prison system so you got to get out of streets so she told him write down so the little stuff that I did she forgave it because it wasn't a deal breaker had I did it again it would have been a deal breaker and I went further it would have been a deal breaker had I skipped the small stuff and went right to the big stuff it would have been a deal breaker so a listen city is ten times you need listening to video ten times nine now I got some old I could go a lot longer but I'm gonna stay within an hour cuz I don't wanna just you know keep rambling I feel like that eight or having a timeline kind of round us out for good for now and also a tonig a stand guard actually listen to video ten time ten days in a row you need to get this in your spirit write it down put it in your notebook put in your own words write you a paragraph for each rule and really get it in your spirit god bless you we'll talk soon

Channel: Tony Gaskins

Views: 89,155

Rating: 4.9235449 out of 5

Keywords:

Id: gNSxAWKDakQ

Length: 59min 59sec (3599 seconds)

Published: Wed Jun 24 2020