Y'all Mind if I Rank Some Bloodborne Bosses!?

hey rusty let's rank some blood-borne bosses because that video topic hasn't been beaten squeezed and done to death in like 17 different editing styles by like 60 different creators already no no no this topic isn't oversaturated at all alas I don't know it looks like blood-borne content is kind of in demand for me right now so I don't know and if I'm being completely transparent with you guys I'm looking for excuses to keep playing this game instead of doing work so hey guess what we're gonna do today the following bosses are going to be ranked not by difficulty but simply by good old-fashioned coolness how fun the fights themselves are how cool they look etc I okay whatever you already know why you're here let's just let's just go Mieke lash more like piece of trash an elusive little twerp that seems to just not want anything to do with you yet you remain insistent on getting him to use his head as your convenient little axe holder if burning a birdcage over your head and running around like an idiot hopping through mirrors and dropping gates down on you doesn't scream I don't want to fight you then me clash is either bad at giving hints or you're honestly just a blood crazed sociopath this is less of a boss fight and more of a glorified tag simulator someone with the subtitle host of nightmares and their name sounds like they should be at least giving you more of a reason to fight them just don't back him up too tight in a corner because after you've tagged him aka triggered the second half of the fight it is now his turn to tag you and he makes sure to let you know he is no longer interested in being nice all the difficult parts about this boss are just annoying and cheap if he kills you well you suck because you just got your ass beat by a man with a laundry hamper on his head and if you win well congratulations you just beat the ass of someone wearing a laundry hamper on their head yeah I don't like this boss fight not not even slightly next up is wrong the vacuous spider and her name very unlike the former bosses actually 1,000% appropriate considering this boss is about as dense as the boulder she's pretending to be when you find her you aren't actually fighting ROM here half the time you're either dodging around cosmic asteroids that for whatever reason have tracking abilities because we all know how technologically advanced [ __ ] rocks are and the other half of the time you're preoccupied with dancing around one of the many spider mosh pits she's just dropped on you I just don't like this boss I don't know I don't like spiders I don't like the war Rahm I don't like how the word sounds I don't like the surprising amount of effort it takes to say her name during voiceovers I don't like that her face switching gotcha moment is just teleporting ten feet somewhere in a random direction it's about as uneventful as a boss as I can think of like it actually just feels like you're fighting a sentient Boulder with a bunch of smaller less sentient boulders that attack you by head-butting the ground and poking you to death and somehow that actually ends up killing you at number 20 is the witches of hem which if fighting a giant rocket doesn't sound that palatable to you then maybe you should try fighting a pair of invisible rocks that move slower than ass and someone from the ground mad imps with sickles that are just bound and determined to not stagger like ever the witches of him wink if you're a new player are just straight-up confusing the fight lures you into thinking this IMP spawning in the middle of the area is actually the boss because why the hell wouldn't you think that at which point form or spawn in with their own health bars and it's only then that it clicks with you that maybe you should be doing something else simply put you find the witches by actively avoiding the thing the game wants you to attack because that makes a ton of goddamn sense unless you just luck out and one of the witches are stupid enough to gleam forth their shiny magic balls that might as well be a giant picket sign that reads stab me wait wait what I'm attacking the boss but her health isn't going down like I killed her but the fight isn't over what's going on oh oh right witches there's uh there's two of them well alright then next is living failures yeah yeah I know I didn't feel like spoiling the surprise for you guys or anything but I did lots of work for fromsoft in 2015 and they deemed it fit too monumental ëismí by dedicating a boss fight to all my contributions please don't subscribe to me anyways the living failures look to be about as of living as this chair I'm sitting in and they fail immensely for the most part in being an enjoyable fight hahaha it's one of those collective hive mind bastards where the boss HP gauge is comprised of the many smaller health bars of the various enemies do enough damage to enough dudes and you win simple I wasn't exactly sure how to tackle this thing at first honestly a lot of the surprises this boss fight has was less of a wow factor and more of a are you [ __ ] kidding me what the hell just killed me sort of factor they don't really look like much they're just deformed extraterrestrials that got their heads caught in a giant waffle maker just don't make the mistake of under estimating them like I did because if you play passive and allow their little Lovecraftian book-club to congregate in the middle of the garden they don't just take you to space and throw you into the biggest asteroid field they can find unless you hide behind this conveniently placed tree right in the middle of the garden because you know that's that's something that would save you okay I have to ask what is it with this game in rocks dude the one reborn makes me question a lot of things in life things like how do those bodies get stuck together in such a weird and off-putting fashion why are their legs on the sides of this creature that don't seem to do anything important what chaotic evil bastard and this vengeful cosmos looked at this thing watched it die and then decided hey guys you know it would just be the funniest meme ever you know it would make everyone happy let's just bring this ugly [ __ ] right back to life everyone's favorite undead mass is also assisted by a cohort of reg high maidens that heal him up whenever you wound him as if having the appetizer from Sponge Bob just crawl out of the sky wasn't enough motivation to get off your ass he's week two pretty much every damage that isn't arcane so just about anything in the purchasable inventory would be of great benefit to you but if I'm being honest you probably don't even need any of that to take him down the most common combat strategy is just about the exact same for every other gigantic blood-borne blob boss locate the ass slap it a few times back up when he starts charging the good ole AoE and then close in once again and by the looks of this dude's character design actually finding said ass might be the hardest step in that sequence next up is the celestial emissary if you were confused in trying to dodge in between all the blue ball sack swatting at you while looking at for the boss then I honestly couldn't fault you for that it took me more than enough time to even register that one of these sentient party inflatables was actually the boss in which I was supposed to kill and once I figured that out the ensuing fight was about as easy as your mom chopped him up enough and he'll enter a second phase where just like any other blood-borne cosmic entity he'll grow four times his size sprout some jellyfish tentacles from his brain and start shoving space lasers up your ass his first and second phases respectively are just a regular sized mob and a supersize me version of a completely different mob this boss is definitely the least creative in the game in my opinion at least in terms of design but I wouldn't say it's completely boring I don't know it's kind of cathartic slapping around the lesser dudes and watching their heads bounce around like water balloons but no it's pretty easy if it takes you more than two minutes to take him down you're probably doing something wrong despite being somewhat in the lower middle section of the list the shadows of yharnam boss fight I would probably say is the least memorable it's just a trio of dudes that six or so locations later become just regular ass enemies you have to kill on your way to another boss only without all the giant serpents coming from out of the ground to bite you in half and that's another thing the things about this fight that are difficult were excruciating ly difficult for me like put the controller down and take a lunch break sort of difficult it's just exhausting and how much attention it demands from you I don't know if I'm just not good at multitasking or what but this dude just kicked my ass over and over again each shadow has his own preferred fighting style one is melee one is ranged and one is kind of both but not really ideally you'd want to attack the range guy and erase him from the picture as soon as you're able but that's hard for me to do maybe because I don't know I just sucked acid boss fights with more than one target because exacerbating the weaknesses of one guy is usually just opening a window for someone else to come and take it a butt-fuck ally so if you aren't good at multitasking this fight is not going to feel that fun to you at all it feels like the only way to just really own this fight is to micromanage every little thing that all three of them are doing at all times which is just exhausting it doesn't feel fun it doesn't feel like there's a huge payoff or anything at the end but goddamn it do you feel like a badass when you parry the Slytherin house rejects and slice their health bar in half there's nothing really too exciting about a dude with an axe father gascoigne has been thought of as one of blood-borne 'he's first brickwall bosses that a lot of players unfamiliar with what they're getting into simply just can't best him I on the other hand knew exactly what I was getting into and I still got my ass flattened the first time father Gascoigne's fight begins with him instantly running at you with a giant axe leaving you little time to scoop your tongue up from the floor after you've attempted to pronounce his name correctly but for the first two phases the fight offers little in terms of extravagance all you're really doing is getting your [ __ ] kicked in by a dude who is bigger and somehow faster than you and don't worry that theme becomes pretty prevalent the later down the road you get and just when the fight gets about as boring and as readable as possible for the game the left turn into van helsing land and father gasoline ditches his axe and just boom just giant werewolf out of [ __ ] nowhere no you're fighting this now sorry the blood starved beast is both the next boss on this list and technically also the next boss in this game's recommended sequence of progression some people think this fight is fun I very much do not first off this is a boss that for whatever reason the game goes out of its way to hype up and then introduced I mean look at this a massive open dirt road climactically leading up to an old and derelict Cathedral there's a very obvious build up here you know you can tell before you even step in that whatever's crawling around in there is currently preparing to [ __ ] you twice and as you approach the inevitable boss the beginning of the fight is signaled by what sounds like an entire Philharmonic Orchestra kicking their instruments down the stairs all at the same time the battle with this thing has always felt really inconsistent in its difficulty to me his first phase might as well be a pinata beating simulator because of how slowly and how passively he moves around you then his second phase comes in which is like a pinata beating simulator if that pinata had small thorns on it that prevented you from getting close to it and just completely annihilating it because that just wouldn't be fair and then in the final phase just had an ax where it turns out that pinata you were smacking around sprouts legs claws feelers starts vomiting everywhere and oh now you're dead I will say this thing does look pretty cool though these monsters are supposed to be ugly and grotesque and everything you know that's kind of the theme with blood-borne and the blood starved beast looks like he sneezed so hard that the air pressure voided the skin of his ass cheeks through his face so I don't know they nailed that part at least next up is the cleric beast now in the grand scheme the very first optional boss in the game really doesn't seem to have that big of a bart compared to some of the nightmares you find in the end game honestly in comparison to most of these dudes on here I'd be half tempted to knock this fella down a few ranks but I don't know I just kind of like this boss fight it's a nice opening act sort of boss that sets the pace of the rest of the game quite nicely it's not the most extravagant boss in the world and it's swell it's certainly not the hardest but the cleric beast is a nice introduction to the game that lets you know you're in for some weird [ __ ] later on the cleric beast after all looks like a snuggly teddy bear when you compare him to the likes of the one reborn for instance packing around at least 27 more appendages than he actually needs but a giant feathery dinosaur looking bastard with antlers is more than enough for any blood borne virgin to look at and go wow that's [ __ ] up without even having an iota of a clue what they're in for as they continue through yharnam and discover some of the more unappealing monstrosity the cleric beast is kind of a wimp but he's a deliberate one he's a wimp with just the right amount of you in his look to get you prepared for the rest of what's to come doing battle with the moon presents an optional boss fight against one of Blood borns cosmic gods known as the great ones means you're well on your way to discovering blood-borne true and final ending just in summary here I feel like the moon presence is one of those final bosses where looking cool and cinematic takes priority over actually being hard to fight which is you know that's perfectly fine that's just not the kind of boss I'd expect to be the true endings last line of defense so to speak it's easy to be intimidated by her attacks because they aren't anything like you've seen before but they stop making any sense if you just think about them for more than three seconds she has an arena sized AoE that reduces you to exactly one point of health but it staggers herself in the process giving you time to pop a couple blood vials and nullify the move completely and she also has a blood splatter ability that suppresses your healing which I don't know that would be a pretty scary move if her jump attacks in signature 3 hit melee took even a semblance of effort to dodge around in short the moon presence is kind of a fun fight I guess but it's the final final boss of the game so I almost feel like I'm missing out on something by not getting my ass kicked next up is vicar Amelia whom I deemed to be the first actual oh [ __ ] boss in the game a lot of players attribute this title to father gasoline especially with this final phase going old mr. Hyde on your ass and where I can definitely see why frozen gelatin is the reason 90% quit the game so early in vicar amelia is the boss fight that really dives deep on what blood-borne expects from its players it's a grand fight against the largest boss you've faced with also the largest health pool of any boss you faced thus far additionally she has a self heal ability that can be suppressed only with an item in which you need to find somewhere in the ward which is the numbing mist and you need to actually find it like you can't just drive to your low bloodborne 7-eleven and catch this [ __ ] on a two-for-one special like you have to look around for it and looking around is one of the most critical elements of how playing blood-borne or not and I guess any souls game works there's also a couple paths that diverge away from this fight both of which lead to bloodstone upgrades that you will very much need on your weapons if you want this fight to take any less than 10 minutes and because of this I would argue that vicar Amelia is the first fight that overtly encourages exploration and therefore a blood-borne first real fight that gets you fully immersed in its gameplay which is why I placed this fight directly in the middle because she isn't really that boring nor that exciting she's just necessary so now that we've cleared out the first half of the list here is where the boss fights begin - what the hell wait what is that Oh No oh god it's an ad but [ __ ] [ __ ] no no no no no wait I'm not done yet well sure hoping and just played there because if not then rusty just done made a damn fool of himself anyway let's just let's just go and thus we beat on to the second half of the list where the boss fights in my opinion actually get really exciting Murr goes wet-nurse waits for you atop the nightmare castle of death and despair and whatever the hell these things are Murr goes wet-nurse is demented and [ __ ] up for many reasons not only does the game savagely lure you into thinking you're about to fight an infant only before revealing that you're actually about to fight something much goddamn worse but the entire fight has the soundtrack of a music box in the background which you can actually hear in central yharnam towards the start of the game the whole fight is cocked up in the head and I absolutely love it Murr goes wet-nurse and you'll start to see this as a theme for the remaining bosses on this list has some really cool [ __ ] you in the ass attacks but none of which are honestly that hard to avoid as long as you're paying attention at a point in time the nurse will spawn a doppelganger and begin attacking you with a clone of herself and if you can time dodges right it just feels like the greatest [ __ ] in the world watching her charge up that six blade attack and then just stepping out of the way at the critical moment is euphoria with the capital P martyr ligarius of cainhurst castle is definitely one of the most relentless boss fights in the game but also one of the most enjoyable in my opinion there's no real key strategy here mopping the floor with ligarius is an accomplishment you just have to put in the hours for his first phase is challenging enough with him throwing his weird red screen magic at you but his second phase is just both through the wall to kill you mode he actually becomes cainhurst to Jesus he's flying around like a pterodactyl clearing the entire arena with a single bound he's pulling out swords and [ __ ] it's just a really energetic fight that demands just enough of your attention to feel satisfying without it feeling overly cheap don't get me wrong ligarius is still one of the hardest [ __ ] in the game but none of his attacks feel scummy or intentionally designed to dick you over if you die too ligarius you often know why you died maybe there was an attack you just didn't see coming or maybe that final scythe swing took just a second longer than you thought it was going to and despite your best efforts to dodge it it still just ended up catching you right in the neck if get good was a boss this dude would be it no strategy no cheese you just win by becoming a badass laurens the first vicar is the one optional boss of the dlc that you actually have to go out of your way to trigger and it's for this reason why i've placed him lower than most of the dlc bosses with the exception of the living meatheads because it suffers from what i'm just gonna call moon presence syndrome where the work and thought requirement to even get to the boss seems to almost outweigh the excitement of fighting and defeating the boss itself the only one big payoff here is really just oh [ __ ] you get to fight lawrence and then after about ten seconds of seeing his second phase that sentiment turns remorseful really quickly and oh [ __ ] I get to fight Lawrence suddenly becomes [ __ ] I have to fight Lawrence he fools you into under estimating him by thinking he's just a souped-up cleric beast with flashy fire effects but all that changes on a dime where his second phase swoops in and his legs explode nope not not even memeing not making that up like both his legs decided to give up and they just [ __ ] explode and somehow this makes him tougher now he has 50% of the limbs he used to while also being 50% more of a pain in the ass because now he vomits pools of lava and he has a stun locking ground-pound combo that only ends whenever the hell he wants it to because he's [ __ ] mothering lawrence and you're gonna do what he goddamn tells you to the amygdala battle is technically the first of the endgame bosses the frat party of giant bug heads you see chillin out climbing on buildings and crap since you're our ghoul have been keeping a steady eye or 12 Vanya and when'd you start bolting it towards this building here that's obviously only there for the debate this amygdala in particular decides that it's time for your initiation process now the game has been hyping these enemies up for a long damn time and ever since you first got introduced to them you I don't know you just knew in the back of your head that at some point you were going to end up fighting one and now that time has arrived so this alien movie reject better be laying down some pro gamer moves on my ass problem is depending on what build you've been rolling out with this fight can actually go pretty quickly I mean like super ultra mega dumb quick like using a compass to draw straight lines kind of dumb his attacks are pretty obviously choreographed and every now and then he'll invite you in words to strike his equally obvious weak spot which just so happens to be his massive dumbass head and you usually only have time to get in one hit before he rises back up which means if you have a strength build or some other build that can quickly deal massive damage in one hit that only means less times you'll have to run through that cycle honestly I don't even know what he's doing so high up in this lip did that [ __ ] just rip his own damn arms off okay never mind that's uh that's kind of badass next up is darkbeast parle probably blood burns most divisive boss battle ever every Souls game has that boss you know what was a cakewalk for one player always seems to be the largest thorn in the side of another and for blood-borne that's dr. parle over here he's a big shock boy with melee combos for days in his spare time the dark beast enjoys long walks on the beach and jumping around everywhere to [ __ ] over the players lock-on reticle and then laughing hysterically while said player is busy dislodging their head from their ass this fight may be difficult to some players but that's never bothered me too much about this fight because the whole premise of it just feels fun I don't know there's something awesome about stubbing your toe on a large pile of debris and then watching that pile of debris transform into a [ __ ] dinosaur ready to chew you face off because you disturbed his nap I think he's just challenging enough you know he's close to in-game boss territory so Miyazaki ain't finna go easy on your ass but it offers some decent enough attack windows that you have to work for to take advantage of I've always thought it to be a really engaging fight I also just kind of think blood-borne uses this boss to flex its level design a little because there's nothing cooler in his souls games than felling a giant monster and opening the door he was blocking to arrive at the ass end of a level you already picked through like eight hours ago and then you spend the next 10 minutes giving yourself a headache trying to map out where all the other areas could be in relation to each other and it's just look it's a cool fight is what I'm saying alright and here we find ourselves at the entryway to the final five these remaining fights are just they're just awesome these guys are the prime reasons why I always wished blood-borne could have put in some sort of boss rush mode and know the chalice dungeons don't count let's start the remaining top five with the dude that literally feigns a [ __ ] physical disability just to lure you into not taking him seriously when I was at my first in-game run I knew I had the option to either fight him or just simply accept my own death and when I chose to fight him and then saw him just stand his ass up like it wasn't no thing I legitimately thought I chose the bad ending that's how intimidating this dudes reveal it and then after I chose the other ending I I realized he just stood up either way so the game wants to throw you this curveball from soft knows how to make a damn great villain and they want to make sure you know it it's just two old geezers duking it out in a no-holds-barred balls-out blade swinging fight to the absolute death he's just as tough as he needs to be for a final fight and honestly I think the biggest reason why the moon presence felt so underwhelming is only because it's sharing the stage with this old fart in summary gehrman expressed delivers to you a jumbo extra-large big gulp supersize me ass-kicking with a side of french toast and he looks tougher than nails doing it to the orphan of cause is just it's scary it's freakin freaky frakkin scary man the final encounter in the hunters DLC is a dark reminder of blood-borne 'he's nihilistic no hope and everything is terrible approach to storytelling there's no build up no climax no righteous payoff that ends the story on a good note no sir the only thing you're finding at the end of this rainbow is a sobbing grinning Fish Face crawling out of his mother's corpse and kicking the [ __ ] out of you with his own massive placenta and you poke him around for a couple minutes until he finally tugs his balls and enters the second phase everything from lightning strikes - exploding organs to self disfigurement all in the effort of proving a point that you don't mess with this dude's family the orphan of cause means business and to him business is serving up quality unforgettable stomps - your character Oh while singing to you the song of his people you just don't [ __ ] with this guy you just don't do it the end game boss of the hunters DLC was not what anyone expected and it's honestly a turn that no one without any knowledge of the Lord really saw coming it never once occurred to people that this infamous and all-powerful cons we kept hearing about was just a giant slug that washed up on the ocean everything about this fight is just sour and depressing and I absolutely loved it this fight on the other hand has very little surprises no placentas no fish no self mutilate well ok maybe a maybe a little bit of self-mutilation lady Maria guards your approach to the astral Clocktower and it's pretty obvious that she would sooner bend over backwards and literally hand you harassed and let you through to that Hamlet on the other side a corpse should be well left alone teases Maria it only makes that much more sense when you realize that Maria was at some points trained by gehrman because you can definitely see some overlap in their fighting style and well you know in the you can see that in the first phase at least things kind of get weird when she she she kebabs herself and starts flinging her own life juice out you but oh hey look your blood is on fire that's pretty neat huh if you were only alive to see it so let's all get in the bus and take a class field trip to Paree city because if you have a firearm that's any faster of a draw than a cannon then you're probably going to enjoy this fight a lot more than most others have that played this DLC a British might actually be one of the coolest bosses ever on top of being completely optional she's also pretty well hidden in the upper cathedral ward area not only do you have to slice and hack your way through interstellar space gremlins just to even get to her and know she exists but the player also has to brave the even more mentally arduous task of somehow finding out that this window right here can be broken like no [ __ ] this took me 10 minutes and you can imagine how stricken with boredom I was to just start vandalizing windows funnily enough this actually falls in congruence with a Lovecraftian short story named Haunter of the dark that specifies going through a window to reach this primordial evil being so I can't even complain about how cryptic it is to even get to the boss because it still makes sense this thing is scary as hell it's creepy its wings look badass and the music score was written and composed by God himself much like your mom she's weak too thrusting damage and as intimidating as she looks most problems in blood-borne can be solved with a giant cannon ball to the face and debris toss is no different blaster in the head come in for a visceral feel like a goddamn king oh and oh and yes space lasers just stuff she couldn't do without those holy [ __ ] okay come on be honest this shouldn't come as a surprise Ludwig is the barn Don be all in dog boss fight to me in blood-borne a fight with the transitional cutscene so awesome that it's responsible for react videos and montages all across YouTube itself it reveals an awesome second phase awesome war and one of the most badass trademark souls weapons ever all at once just literally just throwing all that [ __ ] at you in the course of like 15 seconds the whole second phase is just a massive Shyamalan curveball that no one could ever see coming ludwig introduces himself to you as an insane horse he looks like your rickety old great-grandfather with twice the mental decay he seems to favor the ancient fighting strategy of if I don't know what the hell I'm doing then you sure as [ __ ] don't if what Vig were a person in real life he would have developed Alzheimer's and suffered from turbo dementia before he even graduated college he's one grotesque [ __ ] but Cerf his ass up in the first half of the fight and Ludvik has a top 10 character redemptions moment by just finding his sentience out of nowhere unsheathing his gleaming blue Souls patented anime butt-fuck sword and sweeping your ass out the front door like a stray kitten even the name above his health bar changes to something completely different and I'm pretty sure that's never happened with any other boss in the game his second face chooses from a garden variety of melee and AoE attacks that are quite honestly cheaper than gas station Funyuns but because he looks like such a renegade hard-ass while doing it such cheapness is easily forgiven in fact one particular AOE he has is a two phase attack with a fake-out sort of air blast that does negligible damage and knock-back and Phase two the attack in which I've codenamed the gotcha [ __ ] phase is just this massive cone-shaped extra-large double-decker [ __ ] you sideways with a bag over your head freight train of a moonbeam with an atom bomb sized reach that looks so cool that practically dares you to get mad if and when you die to it web vick has an in-game reputation for being the toughest of the tough and this boss fight does his name more than enough justice in my opinion it's an exemplary demonstration of taking things from zero to 100 and the bat of an eye guy whatever you did with this boss fight holy [ __ ] just just do it again please do it again yeah I didn't want to include chalice dungeon bosses on here because they're all either regular moms in the base game or souped-up versions of what's already on here with the exception of I don't know like four so I figured if people wanted I would just make that a separate list in the future these bosses were not ranked by difficulty weight health character design were basically anything that's completely objective but feel free to tell me how wrong I am about Paro because like no that one's coming thanks for tuning in to the forage I'm rusty I'll see you in the next video uh bye I guess [ __ ] get out of here

Channel: Rusty.

Views: 1,062,966

Keywords: bloodborne soundtrack, bloodborne ludwig, bloodborne pvp, bloodborne lore explained, bloodborne enemies ranked, bloodborne enemies lore, bloodborne bosses easiest to hardest, bloodborne boss reaction, bloodborne bosses ranked, bloodborne speedrun, bloodborne secrets weapons, bloodborne all bosses, bloodborne asmr, asmr bloodborne, bloodborne arcane build, bloodborne best weapon, bloodborne beginners guide, bloodborne 2, bloodborne all weapons, bloodborne all endings

Id: 9Y6V4QzxUIg

Length: 27min 7sec (1627 seconds)

Published: Sat Aug 31 2019