Why Do Your Parents Hate You?

serious parents of Reddit who dislike hate or resent your children what happened my son told his friends that I was abusing and molesting him because he wanted the attention we were very close child services were called in then the police he stuck to his story I don't hate him I never could sometimes I'm very angry but mostly the betrayal gets me I would never have believed he would do that after several awful months I think it's going to be all right legally but the legal season stress has been overwhelming things will never be the same between us he is a teenager bTW I dated a guy for five years and he was the sole parent of a kid he basically raised her barely above neglect levels she had food clothes a room but he will basically not do anything to care for her and wouldn't even see her for days on end she was 6 when we met I felt I had to step in and help out and he basically dumped raising her on me I was overwhelmed resented the fact that I had to change my life and lifestyle for her but when I would withdraw she basically was left in her room frequently grounded for minor infractions because it meant he had an excuse not to interact I tried to make things special for her planned outings and whatnot she never expressed gratitude and would blow temper tantrums that things weren't enough I wasn't spending enough money or we went to the local amusement park when she wanted to go to Disney her father was manipulative if I took time for myself he would tell her it was because I was being selfish she picked up on this and would threaten to tattle on me if I didn't do something or told her to take time she told her grandparents head grates were bad because I didn't do it for her when her father and I split up it was hard because I knew her dad wasn't willing to parent at all and I knew she would be neglected and no one deserves that but I had to get out of that abusive relationship we kept in touch for a while but her dad started using her as a weapon I broke contact now she posts angry messages on Facebook directed at me she is entering her teen years and blames her problems on me I am a stepparent I love my son love him like crazy but he's a slob and he married a slob with two slobby children and they had another child who is our adored grandson and likely also a future slob their house is always filthy and by filthy I mean filthy they have five dogs and at least two cats inside the house the dogs are untrained and so they chew through everything and crap on the floor it smells like a cat box dishes are never washed and sit caked with food just wherever they leave it laundry is piled high against the walls of the bedrooms and you have to pick a path across the living room dodging toys dishes dog crap and the cats who are always trying to stay one step ahead of the dogs the smell of cat pee is so strong my eyes literally watered when I walked in beds not made yet they don't even have proper beds we've given them three don't know where they went to they sleep on bare mattresses on the floor sheets optional a floor that is covered with dog feces and dirt I am astonished none of them have developed ringworm or typhoid the kids smell like a dirty litter box and go to school in wrinkled dirty clothing it's humiliating for us and frightening they've been reported to DFS but I don't know what the FS did because the house is still a [ __ ] the whole situation makes me so angry I don't trust myself with either of them the urge to shake them and scream you stink clean your freaking house is my uncontrollable it makes me sick that he and she allowed this to go on neither of em were raised in dirty houses I don't like either one of them but I love them all very much when I became pregnant I had not ever wanted a child I was not at all happy in fact I cried so much and became very depressed I felt very pressured iter going through with it by my husband he had very good intentions but it was just not something I wanted for myself we had agreed before we married that we did not want children so I was very resentful and miserable but I absolutely did my best to be a good mother because my baby had no say in this and I believe all babies deserve loving mothers regardless of circumstances so I faked it as best as I could and got help I never wanted to hurt her or for her to feel unloved but it was so hard never did it feel natural to me I never found much enjoyment out of raising a child I was exhausted and burned out by all the stuff kids do I resented giving up my plans my work my horse my whole identity for a child I never wanted my daughter is now 10 and we have a great relationship I enjoy her company now my harshness has pretty much dissipated and I feel much better about being a parent now hoping my early issues have not forever damaged her I mean if it was kids you don't really like then I think it will continue to get better the less and less that you daughter as a kid it's okay my mom was never crazy about kids doing kid stuff either she thinks we're awesome now that they're independent adults that's just how she is when I was growin I realized it wasn't personal while my problems aren't as serious as some of yours I do resent my son I felt pregnant when I was taking birth control my husband and I had sworn that we wouldn't have kids but kept this baby he fell ill when he was a baby and it ended costing thousands and bills and caused a lifetime of developmental problems we treat him as if he is normal don't tell him why he goes to his therapies and to anyone who meets him they have no idea that there is anything wrong he has put a great strain on what was once a very good relationship my husband and I were together for four years before having him we rarely fought after having him we fight all the time my husband works long hours to try and pay off all of the medical bills which leaves me to basically be a single parent we don't speak to my in-laws because they tried to use my son as a pawn to make my husband hate me I love my son I bust my butt trying to give him a normal life but I hate what he has done to the relationship I had with my husband I hate the stress that his illnesses have put on my life my hospital has financial assistance my second child was a $33,000 bill for an emergency c-section they forgave all but about $2 K of it due to our low income and set up payments for the remainder perhaps you've looked into it but I thought I'd mentioned bat not my child but my husband's youngest son from his first marriage I don't hate him I care very much for him but he is impossible to like he's 12 and completely incapable of entertaining himself in any way if he isn't pacified with television or some other electronic device he is wandering the house being as loud and obnoxious as possible because bad attention is still attention if you give him attention or try to find an activity to do together he'll simply try to use that as a bargaining chip to get something else he wants later he will do anything to play video games and if you allow it he will play all day without getting dressed or eating he will also pretend to be sick to stay home from school to play video games he has a time limit that will lie and sneak to try to play longer taking away these things does no good he'll continue to be an obnoxious annoying crap until he can play again sometimes I'll let him place so he will stop bothering everyone in the house he's a chronic bed wetter so he frequently smells like urine he's got issues with crapping his pants sometimes too and swears that he has no idea when or how it happens he's been to numerous doctors and counselors who tell us to give him fiber he's being instructed to change out of dirty clothes and put them in the wash but he won't admit to it instead when he soils his pants he'll often hide them somewhere until his disgusting cache is discovered and he gets in trouble his punishment is usually a videogame ban but his behavior never changes I love my husband more than anything and his other kids and my kid are now issue at all just the okay youngest I feel like a monster I have two children my eldest son was diagnosed with autism on the day my second son was born but my second son was then diagnosed with CP at nine months so it was overall a pretty crappy time for us we resented our youngest for a while because we felt it if he wasn't born then we would have been able to focus more on the eldest and his autism would have probably not as severe as it is now but we let those feelings go some time ago he is a wonderful younger brother and is doing very well our eldest son is also doing well and we can see that he has both seneschal and it is up to us to unlock it for us the mistake was never that we had children but rather that we were not educated informed enough to make the right choices which could have prevented a lot of the issues we had during after pregnancy I love my daughter I really really love her it's not her I resent it's the situation I am in I am 23 years old my daughter's violent father is in prison for crimes against me and her I live in the UK so he only got 7 years one count of debauchery one count of physical shaming of a child under 13 you'll be out when he's served her for that she's 22 months old was three months old when he was arrested she's a blissfully happy child but she's been living with my sister and her husband for nine months as I've been struggling to cope with the situation I've tried to kill myself I self-harm I'm on a lot of medication my beautiful little girl is coming back to live with me at the end of the year and I am terrified I have her on my own every weekend and some week nights and stay at my mother's every week with her so I have some support but I don't know what to do I feel trapped when she's around she looks so much like her father and having her with me as a constant painful reminder of it all she adores me and is very clingy when we're together totally natural but I find it suffocating the guilt and shame is crushing and I struggle with the most basic of things I have no money I had to leave my job and I'm on disability benefits what Americans call welfare my current income is less than just my rent and my savings are almost gone what do I do I just want the ground to open up and swallow me so I don't have to face this I can't be honest about my feelings to family or friends they just want me to get better so I can take my daughter home and everything can be all sunshine and roses it won't be I wish I was dead I feel like I'm lost because their parents in this thread with horrible problems and Here I am disliking my son because he's a rude inconsiderate little crap half the time I don't know what happened to my sweet little boy only that he disappeared into a fog of whining selfishness it's called poo throw away because this may be my deepest darkest secret ever and even now it almost brings me to tears to type this one of my children with mental illnesses has been suicidal and has survived numerous attempts there have been times where I have had to sit in a chair in her room and watch her all night while she sleeps everything is locked up in our house I keep cleaning supplies in my desk at work and bring them home only to clean and then take them back everything is a battle with her it's embarrassing all the time as we have an ambulance or cops come over there is so much more that goes on anyway I can remember one really really awful period in our lives about a year ago where I honestly felt like had she not survived her attempts that life for me and her siblings would be easier there are a lot of days where I feel like I resent her inside I just tell myself and try and remember that she is still the sweet girl I remember from her being a kid what I resent is the person she is on meds and the depressed suicidal and self harming person she is when not on meds coma I know this comment will probably be buried at the bottom but I'm gonna take this chance to get some stuff off my chest first of all I don't hate my daughter far from it I love her with all my heart instead I hate the life we have my daughter has a rare chromosome disorder and is also on the autism spectrum not full an autistic though she'll soon be five and still doesn't speak she has a hearing loss so she has to wear hearing aids by not being able to speak except for some words like yes or no we can't really communicate with her everything is done by us asking her questions which she says yes or no to sometimes as she shows us what she wants by pointing using sign language she knows some signs or she goes and fetches something to show us this covers her basic needs but we can never have a discussion with her asking how her day was at preschool etc we can't talk about stuff she doesn't really have any friends and she just recently started playing with other kids at preschool I could go on and on about this but I'm terrified for the future I can't really think about how her and our life will be when she gets older without airing up so many things she won't be able to experience even though I don't even know if she would like to to summarize I don't hate her far from it I hate that she has this disorder at the same time her disorder has made she who she is and I hate myself for looking at other families and being jealous for what they have hearing friends talking about how they discuss events with their 3yo etc seeing other kids playing together and making up games and stuff while my kid is so far behind are the worst part is that I sometimes wish myself or my family to be in an accident so there would be an end to this I of course don't really wish for this but I sometime long for the life I didn't get before getting kids this was my worst nightmare having a kid with a disability I know I should probably start seeing a psychiatrist throw away for obvious reasons I've struggled with deciding whether to post this but I'm doing it because I'm hoping someone can offer a word of advice I'm a stepparent my wife has a son from her previous marriage I'd like to add a little disclaimer before Alice the reasons why I disliked resent him I'm not a crappy staff parent and actually try hard to be a good one I take the hit in a sense because I'm really not fit for parenting but I won't allow myself to turn out into a person he will hate later in life like I said I don't feel like I'm fit for parenting I don't feel comfortable around children and that includes my stepson I have a strong feeling that this is because I'm still young and it might change when I grow a bit older but that's the main reason for my resentment being responsible for a child makes me feel old while my friends are getting together for parties trips and whatnot I'm stuck at home living a life around a school schedule it also doesn't help that his personality isn't exactly compatible with mine I've tried to connect with the kid several times but we're just two different people I'm introverted and enjoy conversation my only successful approach with children is trying to teach them stuff or have them talk about stuff they like my stepson though is more into making messes and speaking nonsense 99% of the time I just can't connect with I don't know how to be one of those fun adults that turns into a child and plays with them another thing that pisses me off is at the kid turns into a total brat on family trips he complains and whines about everything almost all the time I don't really feel like traveling with them anymore the short periods when he's away with his biological father are so cherished that I wish they'd never end they allow me to get this glimpse of what life would be like if it were just the missus and me someone might ask why I married someone that had a kid and that's a really good question as cheesy as this might sound she is the one for me there's no person I've ever felt so comfortable around and with whom I've connected so well on top of that she is very understanding of how I feel about her son so no I'm not getting out of that relationship like I said despite all of that I still make an effort to be a good parent while I have issues connecting with him I try to be as supportive as I can be at helping with homework or encouraging them to partake in activities he enjoys I also try to teach him good values and that seems to be well-received I don't dislike or hate my son but I dang sure have some resentments every now and then I have a five-year-old with extreme behavioral rage issues they stemmed from a large dose of steroids required for a long period of time for a previous medical issue I am not in the dark about these issues I have a psychiatrist and counselor that we pay for for him however no one is willing to do anything because he is five no diagnosis barely medication the wrong ones I have had to inpatient hospitalized my five-year-old son twice I have another child younger than him that was born around the time that all of this started happening and I just watched the difference between the two I sometimes wish I could have switched and had her first because the only reason for trying again was so I could have a girl i watch happy functional families and it makes me angry because we have been burdened by this but we can't travel we can't go to parks or things of that nature because he targets other children and I don't want to be that butthole mom on the playground that just lets my son beat the crap out of other kids CPS is now involve for the fourth time in two years because at school he cracked a kid across the head with Iraq because the school refuses to give him an IEP because he is so young my husband and I have tried every parenting book behavioral therapy method strategy etc nothing seems to work somedays I just turned my phone on silent because I know it's going to be the school calling me saying he won't sit still in class and keeps running out of the classroom acting like an but but I have asked them repeatedly for an IEP and they refused don't get me wrong I love my son more than life itself but it frickin kills me to watch him have to live like this he is so angry all over time and sometimes I have to hold him in a full-nelson on the floor crying so that he won't hurt himself or anyone else I wish other parents knew what this torture was like the constant self-doubt and wondering well he went wrong it is slowly killing my marriage and I honestly wouldn't blame my husband if he did leave in fact I'd probably send our daughter with him just to make sure she was safe so yes I completely understand where some of these other parents in this threader and I don't judge anyone anymore when they say their kids have pushed them to the edge I've been there and back so many times I have the route memorized I made an account just for this question I beyond resent my son he's seven he lies all the time never listens and does harmful things to others his father took off before he was born the state say they can't find him without her SSI or address for me to receive support I've been living off the state for over six years I work and go to uni full time every day is an argument and fight with this child there are no fun times there are no happy moments he makes me miserable all I want to do is graduate with my bachelor's in engineering every morning he makes me late for class because he refuses to listen to a single word I've tried all the ways of disciplining or rewarding to get him on track he's in special education for speech and math support the doctor diagnosed him with ADHD last month we are working through getting the right dose but for now he made me miss my calculus class again because he refused to get out of bed this morning I don't think I love him anymore I feel like he's sabotaging my life and chances for getting out of the welfare system I'm miserable with him in my life I love my children to death and I would never go back if I could but I absolutely feel it is normal to have a moment here or there where you're not too thrilled to be a parent it completely changes everything about your life even when your children are average let alone have disabilities that make things more difficult my children have no behavior problems no problems at school no health problems nothing like that but it's still difficult I still have moments where I am resentful not necessarily of them you know the loss of what my life used to be it would be nice to not be a parent every once in a while and I don't mean sent them to Grandma's for the day because even when they are gone you still have that responsibility you're right I think that's perfectly normal and human I do want children someday and I think I'll try to remember this when I feel that way someday because he looks exactly like his trashy bio father he's got two giant fat belly big man boobs and he walks around the house without a shirt on making me want to vomit he has huge monkey ears that stick out and a big crusty lips he leaves his rancid smelling socks everywhere the car hasn't smelled normal since they were left in there his Lisp makes me cringe his voice is like nails on a chalkboard and he constantly talks about the most pointless spools just to hear himself he whines about everything he is seemingly incapable of remembering anything he is told his crooked teeth and pudgy face make me avert my eyes constantly when I am in my own home he's really dumb as in not smart or intelligent he follows around his mom like a lost dog there that's why I hate him now your turn to hate me you know you need to reevaluate some crap if your wife procreated with someone that created that offspring dang as much as it pains me to say this the older she gets the more she looks like her mother and this makes me remember the pain I keep having to make up excuses and convince myself to accept her as one of my own I do not dislike hate or resent my child in any way but he has wreaked havoc and has been a major handful and his story fits this theme and is quite interesting I think my eldest son has autism and dmdd we got divorced when he was 12 which didn't go well when he got angry he would lose all sense of judgement when he got bigger he started hitting us I took away his iPod as a punishment two years ago and he smashed two of my car windows as I drove away when I got back home he stabbed me with a knife in the arm on purpose so it wouldn't be lethal he thought that would keep me from calling the police thank you autism about a year ago when he was 15 he stole my credit card didn't like his punishment and biked to a nearby downtown area to live the rest of his life free as a homeless man the police helped us find him we started looking for programs to help him but we were too late he had a bad day at school got expelled thought his life was over ran to the nearest bridge and jumped off into traffic that drive to the hospital was a scary drive to make us a dad let me just say he broke eight bones but after three months in the hospital for surgeries tons of PT and $1 million of insurance money he was as good as new he's doing much better we found a great inpatient behavioral program for him and now he's out of that and gone to a kardi waiver with the county lives with roommates in Accardi house he's on the right meds he does well in school public school part-time and he's going on a date this weekend I Drive up at least every other weekend to see him him slightly different in the kid who hates my biological mom I'm adopted and thought I should close a chapter of my book of life by beating my biological family long story short the last thing she said was the best fricking thing I ever did was get rid of you I now have been given the special gift of appreciation towards my adoptive family and what they have done for me gosh that's awful I'm sorry you had to experience that if you are new to the channel you can subscribe I publish new videos every day until then check another video [Music] bye for now

Channel: Updoot Studios

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Keywords: parents, parents stories, parenting, parenting tips, parenting styles, parenting fails, parenting 101, parenting counts, #updootst, updoot, updoot reddit, updoot everything, reddit on tap, toadfilms, pewdiepie, reddit, askreddit, funny reddit, reddit stories, top posts, reddit top posts, reddit cringe, comedy, reddit compilation, /r, r/, r/askreddit, top posts of r/, askreddit reading, best reddit posts, top posts of all time, people of reddit, askreddit question, ask reddit, subreddit

Id: IuZUP-BfxTM

Length: 25min 1sec (1501 seconds)

Published: Tue Jun 16 2020