WHITE VS BLACK CHILDREN IN GROCERY STORE | Ali Siddiq Stand Up Comedy

but I've learned a lot about myself in grocery stores and just I just know things I dress like I want to dress because I learn I learned this confidence in the grocery store I wear whatever I want to wear I wear swayed in the summer I wear white in the winter I don't have no goddamn dress Co I wear whatever I feel if it's Tuesday and I want to wear a tuxedo to the gym [ __ ] it I'm wearing it why because of little white children have you seen little white kids in the grocery store they wear all they favorite [ __ ] at one time they don't give a [ __ ] about you they wear all they [ __ ] Spider-Man pajamas Superman cape cowboy boots fireman helmet backpack they don't give a [ __ ] about you and tell your ass your face Hey sir I'm having a Time of My Life the white boy cool as [ __ ] he don't give a [ __ ] about what you talking about but was thing I learned girl St it is white people the light of hue you need you need black people to help you with your children you do you can control a lot of [ __ ] in this world but what you can't control is a little Travis ass in that grocery store well little white children grocery store be acting a fool I'm in the grocery store and this little white boy his name Travis and first of all you're not supposed to know a child's name in the grocery store this is a [ __ ] Transit area you a supposed to know no kids name but I know Lil Travis name cuz his mother didn't call him 30 times Travis TR St Travis over Travis over here Travis little Travis is on AIS six with his arm out running knocking everything down knocking all that [ __ ] down and I said to let me help this white lady with her baby I grabbed a bag of beans I was waving myself off like a pitcher cuz I don't know I want to throw the curve ball I want to hit his ass with the heat I don't know what I want to do I fast pitched Travis to the back of the head with them goddamn beans Navy beans everywhere po [ __ ] up tra Travis Mama rolled past me and said thank you cuz she knew Travis was in there [ __ ] up she knew it other ethnic groups in here just think about it have you ever seen little black children in a grocery store acting a [ __ ] fol nope you're a lie no you're lying black people know better we know better cuz see y'all don't understand we knew you was going to lie and said it but we know this black parents all over the world no matter what state you from there's a conversation that happens with our children before we go into anything and this conversation ain't for the fainted heart this conversation boy this is this is definitely a child abuse conversation been the same conversation since I was little my mama we me and my sister we be sitting in the back my mama pull up to something and turn around so [ __ ] fast than her seat I be like wait a minute you got a swivel seat and my mama lips be so close to my lips that my lips moving with her lips let me tell your ass something we get in this store you better not touch [ __ ] don't ask for [ __ ] and you don't want [ __ ] that's why you see little black kids in the grocery store with their hands in their pocket looking dignified [Applause] I was so scared of my momma I wouldn't even accept a sample don't people trying to give you s like [ __ ] you crazy as hell my mama [ __ ] around catch me chewing and my mama turn around I'm doing this [ __ ] no that's not happening I don't know people don't understand I I most people that I know that's my that that I'm that's where I'm from that grew up like I grew up we didn't play no games with our mama I'm not going to be in the grocery store I wouldn't even let me tell you something I [ __ ] around and my Mama gave me some responsibility in the grocery store let me roll the basket this is when you learn control the [ __ ] at first you be you be loose with that basket one time and you never loose with that goddamn basket again I'm just I'm rolling not paying attention and hit my mama heel my mama turned around she forgot I was her she [ __ ] I'm like I'm yours you don't even come by that lady no more she like come get this rice now throw it I get it I'm cool cool on your ass

Channel: Ali Siddiq

Views: 274,454

Keywords: Comedy, Def Jam, Showtime, HBO, Comic View, Laugh, Comedy Central, Comedian Ali Siddiq, Funny, Creative, TV, stand-up comedy, Ali Siddiq, the domino effect, domino effect, one hour stand up special, stand up, houston, tx, def comedy jam, bring the funny, it's bigger than these bars, the joe rogan experience, incarceration, ali siddiq stand up full, ali siddiq mexicans got on boots, stand up comedy, comedy videos, black people, white people, comedy, white people vs black people

Id: 4LNJwTbQBQI

Length: 5min 14sec (314 seconds)

Published: Fri Feb 09 2024