WHEN GIRLS PLAY CS:GO 3

do you have a girlfriend a boyfriend i have a boyfriend uh my boyfriend comes home friday i'm so excited same so excited for you i can't wait for you to be happy finally vote uh vote yes for me to take my top off why what are you even talking about you can't take something like that back no yeah no you can't yeah i can't no yeah this girl like is weird right so [ __ ] [Music] do you and your boyfriend do sex yes he does sex i wasn't talking to you what the [ __ ] is wrong with you stop stop stop answering questions for other people take your shirt off or i won't defuse it how do you know it's not off i want a picture right now oh man this was [ __ ] up positive twitter i'm not gonna let go take the [ __ ] shirt i think we i think we should kick her that's her report y'all for griefing how about this if we try it you have to take your shirt off no i said if we won how about if we how about if we talk maybe maybe maybe isn't good enough all right rape it is okay so that game ended but we really wanted to play with this girl again because a she's pretty funny and b i need a decent title unfortunately she was parted with this other dude she knew irl we don't have anything against this other guy we just wanted our friend toby to join instead this is what happened italian stallion has invited you to play counter-strike global offensive sam do we accept yeah why not g'day oh wait hang on a second hang on hang on yeah i don't want to play with this lieutenant pie one two three guy we pretty much have to play with this other guy because they're partied ew oh damn that's unlucky or we could just accept italian stallion as a friend and then get toby in here and then invite her to our bobby enforcer it's [ __ ] completely okay here's toby all right let's see if we can pull this off the ultimate i was just watching um true geordi interview jake paul i mean logan paul ah wasting your time how was it it was it was good in black okay oh we got italian stallion quick where are you i don't see you i didn't see you [Music] okay if we're in we just need to chill right now what the [ __ ] is happening oh hello you tell her what do we do um okay here's what's gonna happen okay can we flip a coin for this because this is [ __ ] yeah this is very awkward gets kicked no no we should flip a coin that's not fair okay okay heads it's john lieutenant we're flipping the coin for the girl and the man that we just played okay fine wait wait wait wait wait wait twist the girl exactly hold up hold up hold up who is that laugh you and the girl it's one or the other okay she's heads because that's all they're good for and your tail is right all right i'm flipping it i've called it i'm being my my full honesty is in the palm of my hands it's [ __ ] tails it's heads [ __ ] sorry all right see you later i'll play with you after can we add him we'll add him we'll add him add him yeah yeah yeah [Music] italian yes are you there i'm here hello hello hello you're really quiet i'm really quiet hello hello hello can you turn your mic up or talk close to your mind how about well it's a headset so i think you know what the problem is i think your shirt is getting in the way of the mic oh yeah toby uh zach was trying to get her to take her shirt off the whole entire of last year that's what that was about by the way and then i said i'd rape her yeah that's another story all right it's all have a great game and let's jump right into it ow what's what's happened sir i jumped right into it are you looking for some gay sex no not everything's about gay sex mate i don't know why you always get it okay sorry i mean i appreciate the hustle and all but you can't just throw yourself at every opportunity like that it's not yeah no i understand you're damaging more relationships than you're building it yeah i hope you understand that but if any of you are interested in gay sex just let me know i'll be over here waiting and uh okay cool cool beans cool beans okay yeah it looks like i am uh i am i am not supposed to be [ __ ] that person cool every time i get unmatched on tinder she said hey you want to meet up i said that depends she said depends on what and i said depends if i [ __ ] your [ __ ] good and uh honestly i don't know where you went wrong here straight to the point in the bedroom with your girl yeah i'm into ptsd [Laughter] yeah talk to me i'm your little i'm your little vietnam vet she just stops yeah lesbians are just dick vegans [Laughter] it's [ __ ] work chronic marijuana abuse that's when you smoke weed every day aka you're a [ __ ] g in that b-ball court a [ __ ] dunkin on hoes on the street with my ak draco uzi gun and these [ __ ] can't handle my cajun heat from down south of my brother [ __ ] dude spicy hello my brother i am ready to engage in poverty with everybody yo grizzy i got a lot of allegations about me being racist can we start having sex well i can't be i can't be a racist if i'm [ __ ] a black guy you can't say that hold on but you can't be a pedophile because i'm 17. [Laughter] it's a double whammy you miss a hundred percent of the myth you don't snort i don't think it's not man no that attitude you seeing kids no what the [ __ ] no i'm not a pedophile what the [ __ ] what the [ __ ] i never look you can see kids without being a pedophile yeah but you paid you paid to see kids you [ __ ] sicko i did it i illegally downloaded it wait that sounds bad [Laughter] you find out your friend is a pedophile so you just go on their facebook page and type minus rep [Laughter] [Applause] great guy buttfucks kids very short bio um [Laughter] can you undo a vasectomy i hope so [Laughter] i'm a pop star [ __ ] no you just let a woman move on holy [ __ ] that's something wow they really said that better than gassing the jews again yeah no one likes to have it twice how about we guess the whites rain check on that one um [Laughter] we talk about how uh abraham lincoln is both on the penny and on the five dollar bill yeah who does he think he is well he did free the slaves and what good has that done us the economy's gonna [ __ ] it wow crazy it's not always about race dude i mean jesus flashback to slavery about two minutes ago wouldn't that just be a flash black because his skin is black yes sorry acid really changed me i don't know what the [ __ ] that was that was some weird like vocal exercise or i was just trying something new it didn't work out i'm sorry really a cop pulls you over you do that i can't control it what's up guys the following clip is a couple months old and i'm pretty sure cryo's already used it in one of his videos but as i was looking through old clips for my second channel which you should all subscribe to by the way link in description i found this bit and i realized it was way too funny to go on the second channel so here it is i hope you enjoy hello hi how are you i'm doing pretty good why uh what brought you here today what are you doing here and you need something well what does it say on my name tank i don't know so i'm illiterate okay well i'll read it out for you okay thank you all right it says is is that a is that an f or a q i sir you can't read your own name i'm illiterate are you illiterate too sir uh yeah uh oh speaking of illiterate i'm i'm here to spread awareness for for illiterate people oh i would love to hear about that absolutely it says [Laughter] [Laughter] give it back to me yeah i don't know it's like some some japanese mumbo jumbo yeah i don't i don't know what the [ __ ] i think they're messing with you man i don't know okay no no this is from this is from a yeah it's from the uh the department of illiterate resources i think it's like the uh sweetie it's called it's called like the fda fda i believe here um here i think are you home hello yeah who is it he's talking about illiteracy can you come see oh i can't read you remember right okay all right you want to come see what's going on hi there hi nice to meet you how are you good i'm not [ __ ] you don't have to talk like that i'm illiterate and i'm here to spread awareness oh that's so great oh you're not you're still talking like that you're still talking like i'm not a human being oh i'm sorry um yeah let me just change up my tone hi okay honey is honey is this good [ __ ] [ __ ] or what i don't know i can't remember his name i'm illiterate you just want to just hand me a couple of those pamphlets and we'll look over them yeah here you go yeah okay thank you thank you um what is on these this is just a bunch of this doesn't make any sense is it actually not english no it's this is just a bunch of scribbly lines and it appears there's a stick figure drawing in the top left corner is that you is that you sir uh no who is that that's my that is that's that's you i i drew that for you yeah why is there a knife in her stomach what is what is that what is that get away from the door okay okay i'm sorry sir please get out of my house sir what please get out of my house get out of my house no no no it's fine i'm here to talk to you about being illiterate because you can't please just you can't be illiterate you can't be illiterate sir if you're [ __ ] dead please don't you can't be illiterate yeah charlie be careful huh hitting me with the bongo drum what the [ __ ] was that this knife is really blunt this is a really blunt knife somebody say blunt oh that's a blunt yo like that yeah you gotta light it up yeah bro yeah [Music] isn't that just vinegar at that point whoa dude what the hell you can't say that dude yeah dude it's vinegar salt and vinegro chips [Laughter] why does he get past me [Music] you

Channel: Fitz

Views: 18,108,402

Keywords: counter, strike, csgo, cs, funny, moments, satire, comedy, fortnite, challenge, try, not, to, laugh, voice, chat, trolling, when, girls, play, best, of, fitz, fun, improv, singing, hilarious, cringe, woman, women

Id: Xjcq2lQnkAw

Length: 13min 54sec (834 seconds)

Published: Mon Sep 10 2018