What Was The Strangest Punishment Your Parents Ever Gave You? (r/AskReddit)

what was the strangest punishment your parents gave you when I was 12 I had two cats and an energist Mastiff anyways one week I didn't practice the piano as much as I was supposed to so I was grounded from petting or hugging both the English Mastiff and any of the cats my mom actually followed me around to make sure I didn't I still had to take care of them though my evil older sister made me a proposition my six-year-old brain couldn't resist she said smell my butt for a quarter I said okay took a whiff and of course she ripped a big fart in my face I ran to my dad wailing Joan Said's moment but for Atwater I did and she farted enough Ally's dad marches too Joan did you tell him to smell your butt for a quarter yes did he smell your butt yes pay him the quarter I felt justice was served when me and my siblings were kids we would always pick flowers out of the neighbor's garden our parents tried everything to get us to stop but spankings and groundings never did the trick inevitably we would end up back in the neighbors garden picking her flowers so finally my mom came down on us like never before we came home showing off all these flower we picked and she nearly started crying I'm going to miss you all so much she said why what's going to happen she proceeded to inform us that the flowers we picked from the neighbor's yard we're alien plants from Jupiter their seeds flew through space and landed on earth where they sprouted into harmless looking plants but if they were ever picked by a human it would in fact that human and turned them into a plant every single one of those flowers we were holding in our hands used to be a little kid just like us who got turned into a flower by the åland plant seeds we all started crying we didn't want to turn into plants we didn't know wasn't there anything that could be done our mom said there was still a slim chance we could be saved we weren't allowed to go outside for the next three days because if we stood in the grass for more than a moment we would start to take root we also had to take a nice cold shower right now to wash off any of the Aylan pollen so we threw the flowers stripped and got in the freezing cold shower desperately trying to scrub the alien plant pollen from our skin so we wouldn't turn into plants while we were in there our mom plucked some petals from the flowers and threw them into the shower with us making it look like we were already shedding flower petals so all three of us were standing in the shower crying and shivering and sobbing when we were out of the shower she bundled us up in our PJs and put a soy to bed when she kissed his goodnight she told each other sad she loved us and if we turned into a plants overnight she would put each other's in a flower pot of our favorite color and keep ice on the windowsill in the living room and she would always love us we all cried ourselves to sleep didn't turn into plants and never picked the neighbours flowers again my neighbor's toddler wouldn't stop picking our flowers so I convinced him that flowers were alive and when you pick them they were going to flower heaven I would pretend that I was talking to them that they all had different names like Janet and Daniel sometimes I would step out of my house and see him whispering to them he never picks them after that though when I was six my grandpa got annoyed at me for doing something I don't remember what so he threatened to put corn starch down my underpants to give me any itchy butt crack for the rest of the day whatever it was I was doing I stopped immediately I was being loud and wild like little kids do my dad asked me to be quiet repeatedly which I promptly ignored fed up with my crap he made me sit on the front porch and yell at every car that drove by suddenly more than anything else in the world I wanted to be completely silent my mom once tired of my only wanting pizza said she was going to force my to only eat pizza for breakfast lunch and dinner until I was sick of it the morning of day 15 my mom cracks when I asked for pizza law people don't get that you can't break a kid that way kids are famous for wanting just one thing I think you have to be at least like 15 or so before that starts working if we misbehaved my stepdad would make us stay up and what children's at Lawrence Welk but we hated it Lawrence Welk I've never heard of that show but holy crap it sounds boring during my teen years if my brother or I did something wrong my dad would take our iPods play our favorite songs and force us to listen as he loudly whistled to him and slapped his thighs to the beat it was torture this is hilarious I'm imagining some angsty music like My Chemical Romance being played in the dad angrily whistling every note while slapping his sighs glaring the whole time I came home drunk as a teenager and my dad took me to the police station to have them keep me overnight a friend of mine had timeout which meant face the corner of two walls while kneeling on uncooked rice so it digs into your knees seemed sadistic I'm not sure if this counts as a punishment I was 14 as years old and supposed to be in bed sleeping I decided I was bored and didn't feel like sleeping so I went downstairs and told my dad dad I'm bored I can't sleep so he told me pull out a chair I did and then stand on the chair I did then touch the ceiling I did then he went back to reading his book and ignored me I was confused and probably stood there for a solid minute before I finally mustered up the nerve to ask him why I was standing on a chair touching the ceiling he told me that I could continue doing that or I could go back to bed I went back to bed I didn't want to eat my green beans so my father said I either eat them or wear them I called his bluff not a bluff with a ziplock baggie and some twine I wore those green beans the rest of the night around my neck they still laugh at that one all your parents sound pretty creative and funny it's only strange to the person being past gnashed if I slammed a door as a kid I was to open and close it 20 times nicely it's actually worked pretty well as I hated looking like an idiot after an argument with mom I slammed the car door when I got out I too was made to open and close it correctly 10x right in front of my high school with everyone watching awful one time I lied to my mom about something really dumb and obvious I was 9 or so at the time after she scolded me she called me into the kitchen to apologize and tell me all was forgiven and I should have some ice cream I immediately said yes I would love some so she scooped out a huge bowl she then asked if I would like some sugar added to the top and of course as a kid I thought more sugar would only make it more satisfying so she added it she gave me the bill and I took a bite into the most sugar covered spoonful I could get turns out it wasn't sugar it was salt then she said see how lying hearse people my tiny trust was forever broken it did teach me a lesson though my mom used to threaten to send my sisters and I to Rancho Cucamonga if we weren't behaving which we thought was some terrible island for bad children turns out it's just a crappy town in SoCal with a large outdoor mall my younger siblings and I were fighting my dad made all of us get into one large shirt and walk around the block together we were like 13 9 and 8 we have framed pictures of our walk of shame in the living room I am picturing the Belcher siblings getting punished by Linda when I was in third grade my teacher wrote a note to my parents to tell them that when we were reading aloud in class I never knew the place when it was my time to read because I was always reading ahead everybody else in my class reads so slow I'd read ahead a paragraph then I'd finish the page then I'd read just the next page and then I would be lost this was in my social studies textbook so my parents grounded me from going to the library question mark my sister's said just go anyway they won't know which opened my eyes to entirely new possibilities in the world when we were visiting relatives in a large city when I was about three I told my father that I wanted a new dad because he was mean he put me in the car and took me down to the dad store which was really a dive bar where all of the homeless drunks hang out he told me to get out and pick a new dad turns out I like the dad I had after all my mum used to threaten to put us in the cupboard with the troll that lived in there we heard the troll once singing his troll song so believed it was in there we found out as adults it was my dad through the wall mene plus one for your dad's trolling skills they caught me stealing chocolate out of the cabinets so they made me sit down and eat like ten bags of chocolate at once I love chocolate I believe their plan was to make me eat so much chocolate I would get sick or feel miserable and never want to eat chocolate again or something like that I don't really know I could see doing this with baker's chocolate my dad tried to ground me for the rest of the year for being late to school on the first day dad you drove us here another one of my mom's bright ideas one day she got sick of my younger two siblings yelling at each other so she told them they could fight but they had to sing their words it ended pretty quickly my future kids will love this used to argue with my sister over the TV channel whenever my mom got tired of it she screamed if you don't stop that crap right now I will throw that frickin TV right out the freaking window I always thought it was just a threat she sure proved me wrong nice mine through my TV out the window too when I was 8 my dad once drove me to the orphanage because I was acting up and told me to get out I settled down when I got caught with weed my mom made me go to a family Halloween party instead of my friend's party dressed up as Clifford the Big Red Dog when I was a lazy 12 year old boy I was on the couch watching TV when my mother came into the room with the kitchen trash she was angry this is the last time I'm going to tell you to take out the trash well good I replied because I'm sick of hearing about it for that little bit of sass I was made to go to all of her friends and my friends houses like 20 of them and forced to collect the trash from every room it was humiliating but in retrospect pretty funny I'm just going to take a note here for I have a sassy ten-year-old on garbage duty I was a bookworm growing up and my parents believed all that reading was bad for my eyes if I read too much they'd ground me by forcing me to watch ABC's TGI Friday line up with them dad claimed it would help my social skills more than all those books since I could talk Full House in the cafeteria come Monday I got grounded from reading because it was the only thing that really bothered me my mom would be like that's it you're in trouble no books for two weeks my friends all thought it was weird but I was upset I'm a librarian now one time my dad was making me study for a class in his office when I wanted to sleep and I was giving him a hard time so at one point he was fed up and instinctively in a threatening manner said do you want to go to bed and I was like here's my chance so I said ugh fine and did he realized like a half hour later but I was already sleeping long I love this one I just picture you dad scratching his head later thinking huh well that didn't quite go as planned strangest being ineffective would be removing the internet cable from my computer I knew the built-in wireless card was worth it my mom changed the password on the user account I figured out how to boot it to safe mode so I could use the administrator account with no password now I'm an IT when I was about 14 or 15 my mom found out I'd been watching P she forced me to sit on her bed and watch the P with her while she explained the dangers of s and how to not to treat a woman I was in boxes and t-shirt I didn't know how to control my erections and just seeing a nipple would get me hard we were watching a full-on hardcore porno I could only hide my bonus so well for so long I can't decide if this is clever or fricked up one time about ten years ago I was banned from all electronics except the Wii for three weeks why the Wii was the exception I still don't understand consequently I became really awesome at Guitar Hero I once punished my son by changing his xbox one account privileges so he was limited to playing only ec games the rating below e not my parents but my teacher the class was being rowdy so that teacher said if you guys don't be quiet I won't let you take the quiz we were like haha you're kidding she said one a try me being the smartass I was I said yes and she didn't let me take the quiz and I had to get a note signed by my parents saying what I did I saw a teacher once put the class clown the disruptive doubt about kind back to his place by giving extra homework to everyone except class clown who had no homework to do at all every student in the class had to write thank you class clown name on each pages of their homeworks kids stopped after that of course who I've got a good one for this I got caught watching pee a couple of times as a kid and the last time I ever got caught my dad made me write out the entirety of Homer's Iliad by hand in a bunch of notebooks I wasn't allowed to use any electronics play outside or eat sweets until I finished copying it down I was about 12 or 13 and it took me almost two weeks and eight or nine full college rule notebooks to finish it wasn't followed through with it my sister and I were fighting over legis and my mom said if we didn't stop she'd melt them all in a pot then throw them away I was also told that if I was bad I'd have to live in the basement with to tan Tony my secret brother my parents also told me I had an older sister before me and she was bad so they got rid of her my mother got this one passed on to her from my grandmother when we annoyed her too much she threatened having us go to bed without socks on we were afraid by such a harsh threat and stopped immediately but we never wore socks to bed anyways we took way longer to figure it out than I'd like to admit haha back when I played soccer at around 13 stroke 14 or so my coach would make us run 10 laps around the field saying if you weren't the first ten to finish you'd have to do another ten laps there were only ten of us I was the only one who noticed this and tried to tell everyone that they were being duped but they never believed me no Teletubbies bath towel for months I was enraged I was about four when I did something can't remember what to marry the punishment off go to bed without supper I exclaimed to my mother in the morning I'm alive because y'all know if you don't eat you will die I had been taught some earlier occasion a mum felt terrible realizing I thought I had received a death sentence for some little kid crap if you are 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Channel: Internet Is Fun

Views: 63,609

Rating: 4.8746824 out of 5

Keywords: #updootst, updoot, updoot reddit, updoot everything, reddit on tap, toadfilms, pewdiepie, emkay, reddit, askreddit, funny reddit, reddit stories, top posts, reddit top posts, reddit cringe, comedy, reddit compilation, /r, r/, r/askreddit, top posts of r/, askreddit reading, best reddit posts, top posts of all time, people of reddit, askreddit question, ask reddit, subreddit, sub, askreddit school, r/askreddit how to, reddit parents, reddit parent stories, reddit punishment

Id: G41k9CpwC8w

Length: 16min 30sec (990 seconds)

Published: Fri Dec 27 2019