What sounds like a Good Advice but isn't? r/AskReddit Reddit Stories | Top Posts

what sounds like good advice but isn't never give up sometimes you do need to give something up emo edit omg thank you kind redditers for all the awards and upvotes there is value in knowing when to call it quits some things can't be saved or salvaged this could be relationships friendships anything there's no point wasting your energy further when you've already done your best live each day like it's your last see dying people can do this because they don't have to deal with the consequences of their actions you do edit thanks for the awards i'm somebody who survived what i thought was a heart attack you would think that my brush with mortality would make me think that time is precious and it is but looking at how people die even in developing countries it's bad advance ah i p to my inbox bullied just ignore them likewise it's commonly held that all bullies are cowards and that if you stand up for yourself they'll go running for the hills you could also get your ass kicked and for standing up to them have them increase the frequency and severity of bullying this is why teachers and parents need to step in and none of that zero tolerance let's punish everyone crap the older i get the more i hate the idea of kids not standing up for themselves when somebody wrongs them this includes when the kids own parents douche tea to make fun of them what they are doing to you is wrong but we're not going to punish them in any way you are going to live your life and hope they get bored with you it may take years before they get bored with you double quote marry a doctor so you can live a better life my parents were never like this but i had aunts and uncles who would tell their kids this regularly my wife married a doctor when i was still in college 13 years ago i'm finishing training next year with 450k in debt and have spent the last eight years working 60 90 hours weeks it's a sweet life man great advice especially if it's just for the money s i want to marry a doctor nothing to do with the paycheck or anything growth like that it's because my dad is a doctor growing up i'd rarely go to the hospital because my dad would just treat us at home so as an adult i have no idea when i should go to the hospital and since i'm a broke 29 year old stand-up comedian actor my dad is still my primary care physician even though we live five hours apart whenever something is wrong with me i send a picture of it to my dad does this need stitches why is this swollen is my finger supposed to bend that way he is dreading the day i get my first hemorrhoid whereas if i marry a doctor my husband would probably be able to diagnose that hemorrhoid before i even know something is wrong because of how often he'd be looking at my butthole just do what you love it sounds great but a lot of people aren't good at what they love it's important to do things you love but find a way to make a living too just be yourself double quote at heart this isn't bad advice but it is too vague to really be useful to someone who needs it better put be cognizant that you want to make a good impression but don't do it in a way that misrepresents who you are or makes you uncomfortable i like be the best version of yourself more spend some time and do some introspection keep the parts you like make a plan to change or eliminate the parts you don't like not easy but very rewarding want that job just keep calling to check on the position it ingrains you in the hiring manager's mind and makes them consider you more when your resume makes it to the top of their stack double quote how it really works the manager goes through the stack of resumes finds yours and throws it out then sends you a polite rejection email you're meant to think the squeaky wheel gets the grease but in reality they just replace the wheel if you get a job doing what you love you will never work another day in your life double quote pretty quick way to murder all your favorite hobbies and leave yourself with no means of escape or unwinding in your personal time happened to me when i transitioned from meditative painting to freelance artist biggest advice i give to aspiring artists especially those who love drawing all day long and do nothing else before going into art full time find a love for something completely unrelated to it don't go to bed angry with your significant other sometimes you just need to sleep on things and take time to cool down especially if you're like me and grouchy af when you're tired don't try to force a resolution to a conflict agreed late night arguments get exponentially worse when one or both of you is tired cranky and worried about being able to get enough sleep for work the next day the longer the argument goes on the more those factors will increase intensity of the argument not lessen it nothing is more important than family double quote if you enjoy your family and they support you great advice otherwise pretty much says you're stuck with abuse double quote this always reminds me of the phrase blood is thicker than water the full quote is the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb the original meaning of the phrase was bloodshed on the battlefield creates a stronger bond between soldiers than simple familial or genetic ties in principle it means friendships you choose are stronger than genetic ties to your family marry your best friend not someone you're passionate with because passion fades you'll be comfortable and that's what really matters which is all well and good until you realize five years down the line that your sex life sucks and your partner has found someone they are passionate with now you're out five years a best friend and a partner the truth is there's no right answer to this marry the person you want to be with if you want passion get passion you want comfort get comfort just make sure you're on the same page with your partner my best friend is a lesbian and i'm a straight man but this is terrible advice i was married and had a kid with my former best friend we got along so great we made a great sun we hardly ever disagreed i think we raised our voices to each other once she got bored and cheated on me repeatedly no passion i didn't need it she did didn't realize that until we had a kid still friends still do stuff together for the kid but we're not together and i've never been happier don't marry your best friend be friends with them broke just be yourself woke be the best version of yourself tbh i've had a hard time even with the woke version of this advice i've had chronic major depression most of my life and i think a lot of other people have especially the type of insecure not confident type of person who receives this advice comma that which doesn't kill you makes you stronger talk to hr they want to help you hr is there to protect the company not the worker that's why it's called human resources and not employee satisfaction it's not resources for employees the employees are the resource what's best for you as a person isn't always in sync with what is in the company's interest follow your dreams this one hits home for me i was a hobbyist baker for years and finally decided to follow my dreams and quit my job to start a bakery turns out baking bread at my leisure from the comfort of my home is much different than getting up at 2. 0 am to bake bread just so i can keep the lights on stop crying crying doesn't solve the problem [Music] do work you love should be do work that doesn't kill you and pays the bills i like your addendum as i heard it similarly growing up sometimes our work and passions coincide other times we work to support our passions double quote always help me remember that it's okay to not love your day job calm down okay first of all to be fair calming down would actually help near always telling someone to calm down less so if you don't tell your partner absolutely everything then you don't have a good relationship a good relationship is when you both have secrets and none of you care about them wear two condoms for double the protection the real thing to do is to double up using both the condom and birth control additional condoms would have an asymptotic rate of return anyway the second is less useful than the first and so on double up on methods and get regularly tested if you really want to be safe don't sleep with people who haven't recently been tested to be clear don't double bag condoms even if it didn't risk tearing it or some other issue the benefit of an extra would decrease asymptotically very quickly realistically you'll always have problems with leakage and misuse no matter how many you try wearing again don't do this double up on methods and not condoms close bracket forgive and forget always forgive but forgetting only tells the person that you don't value yourself enough to not allow it to happen again so no i will forgive you and remember how you screwed me over so that you can't do it to me again you don't always need to forgive you don't have to be angry you can still find peace and let go of what happened you don't owe anyone your forgiveness eat all the food on your plate my mom stopped using the starving kids in africa line when i told her to box it up and send it to them i got my butt whooped and grounded for probably longer than necessary but she didn't use that line again so when just be positive instructions unclear been sent to quarantine hang in there for people with depression come on don't be sad thanks diane i would have never thought of that i'm cured even worse when they start listing things you should be grateful or happy for never give up know when to give up listen to your elders last time i did this i accidentally became a hitman befriended a stripper fought an anarchist and got myself killed in a lab explosion just be yourself this works only if yourself is socially acceptable or not awkward so being actually yourself can indeed make things harder in social situations and it's a terrible advice when it comes to making friends let me tell you about this time share great investment think about all the money you'll save on vacation buying a home make sure you buy the home of your dreams the biggest most updated one you can't afford you only live once can't find what you live within your budget well buy a [ __ ] hole at your budget limit and flip it of course don't include maintenance incidentals or a safety net into your exercise there's so many more adulting in the us at least sucks it's a minefield a bad or outdated advice and outright scams it's exhausting to help combat coronavirus add some ammonia to bleach for cleaning solution that will kill 100 of the virus and other germs i hear some people say what doesn't kill you makes you stronger but i've seen the nearly killed and that just couldn't be much wronger don't judge a book by its cover if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck it's a duck you're fine the way you are no you're not nobody is you should never stop trying to be better than you already are if you're fat depressed miserable weak plateaued addicted anxious unsuccessful or aimless then you're not find the way you are and never let anyone convince you otherwise love conquers all don't get me wrong love is very important but love is the common denominator all your persisting romantic relationships should have a relationship isn't special just because you love the other person or they love you just because you love someone or they love you doesn't mean you have to or should put up with their [ __ ] or worse if you don't employ your head and heart in equal measure it's going to be a difficult life [Music] basically any advice from before 2000 about the job market call to follow up an application algorithms in application bots weed you out the second you turn a nap in loyalty to the company and dependability will pay off in the future usually just means you will get more responsibility for minimum raises job hopping looks bad on resumes many companies don't care and in reality it's the only way to achieve upward mobility and wages do extra work to be noticed and rewarded usually any extra hours will result in cutting hours on later days to avoid having to pay overtime or give bonuses do what you love and you will never work a day in your life unless you are very very lucky it is much smarter to find something that will allow opportunity and good pay with no regard for your personal interests comma let me tell you a piece of advice that i got when i was younger it was pee yourself sorry be yourself that sucked he yourself would have been bad too but be yourself never mind the logical absurdity of it it can be an incredibly anxiety provoking thing to hear as a teenager or an adult for that matter you know what myself was at that time scared as [ __ ] lonely anxious to the point of insomnia being that me was not an option i didn't have the tools to deal with those parts but if for me i was supposed to be being was something else then yes no [ __ ] i'd love to be that do you have the rest of the instructions jackass they frank if you don't want the boys to bother you don't dress like a mess if you didn't want to be harassed why did you bring those tits with you yes obvious i would hope just do it especially bad advice when being faced with an illicit substance save it for a rainy day i used to take this too literally like i was being selfish for enjoying something now instead of saving it for later for example i would do stupid stuff like delay using coupons for free items or experiences because i felt it was more mature and disciplined to save the treat for later eventually and inevitably the coupon would expire another silly example would be not opening a good bottle of wine like i didn't deserve it now and it would be smarter to save it for some abstract time in the future please listen to some words of wisdom from an old timer the past is history tomorrow a mystery all we have is the present moment and it's called the present because it's a gift i'm not saying don't think about the future plans are good just remember to treat yourself along the way success is a journey not a destination sometimes you gotta grab the bull by the horns nope you don't treat people the way you want to be treated no treat people the way they want to be treated as an introvert this took me an embarrassingly long time to work out you can do anything if you work hard enough meritocracy is such bs because it overlooks all the advantages some get in life while blaming the disadvantage for being unmotivated trust your feelings double quote dangerous so-called advice as someone with anxiety i often have to fight against my own feelings or rather to keep them from controlling me not that our feelings don't matter or that they're never correct however they can and often will be extremely deceptive and going based on your emotions alone is unwise sometimes the answer is outside yourself not inside i can't tell you how many times my mother has had to help me keep different situations in perspective don't let it bother you double quote you're entitled to your emotions and expressing them in a healthy way is paramount to good mental health tilting your head back when you have a bloody nose it may seem like it'll just keep you from losing more blood but nope the blood actually slide down your throat and it can cause you to start choking and drowning on your own blood god never gives you more than you can handle double quote sticks and stones may break your bones but words will never hurt you sad one i hear people say a lot on ridicules respect isn't given it's earned which sounds good and principled but practically it isn't great advice i'll teach my kids that you respect everyone by default and it's theirs to lose the key to having great conversations is asking a lot of questions people love talking about themselves double quote i was sat next to an acquaintance i barely knew at a dinner event i wanted to be friendly and make conversation so i asked a lot about his work his travels and so on at one point he said not jokingly so what is this an interrogation i stopped talking to him after that but i also learned a lesson [Music] smoking just stop depressed just laugh playing video games too much just turn it off don't follow that advice get the fck out of my house i could go on but my parents track what i post and i don't want them to beat me [Music] follow your heart my heart is a jerk and love means nothing when the person you love is abusive also at 6am my heart says quit your job health care and money is not important double quote honesty is the best policy sub s to come clean if arrested and you'll get a break for being cooperative source criminal defense attorney keep your trap shut violence is never the answer sometimes it very much is i wish someone had told me this convincingly like a year ago i wouldn't have beaten the shti out of my bully and been done with it instead i didn't want to resort to violence and went to the school they didn't help they actually kind of made me angrier at the whole situation instead of punishing the guy they dragged me the socially anxious kid and him the guy who makes me so angry i can't talk into a room with the principal and the vp and just expected us to talk it out it made me lose all faith and trust in my school as well as making me not like the principal treat people how you would want to be treated doesn't apply when there are people waiting to manipulate you take from you and drain your energy with their terrible personalities always be kind double quote the absolute worst for your mental health it better to teach our children that there will always be toxic unhealthy people around us and it is in our best interest to limit contact with them very rarely should you ever bend over backwards for people put yourself first baby girl never give up double quote sometimes cutting your losses is the correct move in fact there's plenty of other little sayings that basically mean the opposite don't throw good money after bad when you find yourself in a hole stop digging don't get too attached to a mistake just because you spent a long time making it don't quit immediately on the first bump in the road but i see so many people just making things worse and worse because they are not a quitter or whatever never apologize for who you are if you want to alienate everyone that is do what you love then you'll never work a day in your life if you think you don't have to work for what you love just do it how about no most mainstream survival tips like cutting the top off of a cactus and drinking the juice feet might be some species that that works alright for but most species are going to make you sick just focus on improving your weaknesses i used to do that and thought it was intuitive but i've learned i can accomplish so much more by improving my strengths than trying to strengthen my weaknesses double quote never go to bed angry at your partner [ __ ] it's okay to say that you are upset and just need some rest sleeping on something that you are upset about can help ease tension and prevent you from saying something more emotionally charged than you would like telling wobble to stop drinking cold turkey alcohol withdrawal can kill so if they are truly addicted they need to see a dr and get meds to safely stop of course this doesn't apply to those who aren't physically addicted as they aren't in danger if they stop suddenly forgive and forget you can forgive but you should never forget what people have done otherwise they will just hurt you in the same way we all have the same 24 hours not true for the many people who are forced to work two jobs to make ends meet or have other responsibilities that take up time housework can wait they won't be small forever and then you'll wish you'd spent more time playing in less time cleaning lovely thought karen but eventually emma need clean pants and i'd prefer not to have moldy plates in the kitchen cause i think social services might get a bit judgy on that one it now but thanks for the added motherhood guilt family is family was preached to me by my parents always forgive your family regardless of the grievances because their blood and blood matters most i've had friends that i've only known for months that i would die for before my blooded brother family is earned regardless of relation depending on the context fake it till you make it everything happens for a reason i used to believe this until my little sister died suddenly age 20 there was no reason and i still can't stand it when someone says it to me i narceros or xx when life gives you lemons make lemonade when life gives you lemons don't make lemonade make life take the lemons back get mad i don't want your damn lemons what am i supposed to do with these demand to see life's manager do you know who i am i'm the man who's gonna burn your house down with the lemons i'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down yeah gotta bloom where you're planted double quote nope no fck that fcku fck write the fck off with that [ __ ] the best advice i've gained by reading through this thread is that there is no piece of advice that will apply to everybody when people give you advice it needs to be analyzed so you can figure out what they meant by it and how to apply it to yourself to make it most efficient you're perfect the way you are double quote no you aren't nobody is this advice lets people justify never learning never refining skills never admitting wrongdoing etc this advice stifles personal growth and evolution at every level i like to categorize advice like this under the banner of the participation trophy mindset what goes around comes around this is always terrible advice my colleague recites this every time someone upsets her or anyone the illusion of karma believing that bad people will be punished and good will be rewarded leads to bitterness or sense of injustice when it does not work that way never explain never apologize to me this is what the biggest [ __ ] in the room lives by sometimes explaining something is the difference between having a job and getting fired apologizing is not weakness it is a demonstration of humility which is being the right size you earn respect when you acknowledge mistakes and demonstrate that you can learn from them if something ain't broke don't fix it double quote when you realize that the entire framework has been wrong or obsolete and need to be updated you usually won't have the resources money time skill to do it anymore never go to sleep angry with your spouse double quote tiredness and sleep deprivation makes disagreements worse the most productive and healthy arguments are conducted when both parties are well rested well fed and comfortable it's fine to go to sleep angry if you have the intent on addressing the issue in the morning when people convince couples to stay together for the kids it's better for children to have separated parents than tb in a household where the parents don't get along [Music] [Applause] [Music] you

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Id: N2-raM8YGMo

Length: 28min 3sec (1683 seconds)

Published: Thu Nov 19 2020