What Is The Weirdest Tinder Date You've Ever Been On? r/AskReddit Reddit Stories | Top Posts

what is the weirdest tinder date that you've been on agree to meet at her place just your average netflix and chill date i was in my mid-twenties and she was early thirties with one kid just gorgeous blue-eyed blonde she lets me in the front door and there's about a 40 year old man just sitting in a recliner and her son was just sitting on the couch and they were watching tv she grabs my hands and takes me down to the basement obviously just anxiety to the duck in nines like what is going on that is her husband and she can just duck who she wants apparently so we go at it while her hubs and son watch tv she was being obnoxiously loud great six but super awkward especially leaving made eye contact with the dude on the way out he looked just dead in the eyes like a defeated look never went back about 10 minutes and she karate chopped her child and then spent the rest of the date holding her blouse closed because one of the buttons had come off two years later we're about to buy a house together the weirdest one was prob going out with this dentist guy we were in a cafe he then asked to see my teeth and questioned about my oral hygiene i have pretty good teeth according to him but that was weird i noticed a cute french girl in her bio she mentioned there were some tadpoles in a pothole by her house that she wanted to rescue i never know what to start off with so i figured this would be a good conversation starter i ended up bringing a label spoon with holes in it and we fished a few out of the pothole put them in a jar and brought them to a nearby pond the rest of this first and last date was super awkward but hey at least we rescued some tadpoles guy offered me a bag of marijuana at the beginning of the date then spent the rest of the evening talking about molecules and energies and how the government is trying to give us cancer because of something in the lights we use some weird pseudo scientific stuff i just nodded along and ate my food he didn't eat anything because he fasts 23 hours a day the best part was that the woman at the table next to ours could hear our conversation and we exchanged knowing looks where i said wtf is up with this guy and mine said i know guy kept asking me out for weeks and even called me we had exchanged numbers eventually to convince me so i decided to give it a try we decided to meet at a bar he got there 30 minutes late and ordered a coke apparently he was a recovering alcoholic that's not a problem for me i just thought it was weird that he had agreed to go to a bar and then he proceeded to perform on me what felt like a job interview at some point i even sarcastically asked am i doing okay here after 40 minutes of that he got up paid for his coke and said i'm gonna go i have to get up early tomorrow and left we haven't talked since plenty of fish but oh well telling anyways she just got out of the hospital and a snap blizzard hit the 14th of february 2014 the bus dropped her off but no taxi or uber dead drive out to get her so she was stranded at the a waffle house so i took me and my jeep grand cherokee the 100 miles in the snow to meet for the first time and to save her i made it 90 of the way hit some black ice then slid sideways into a power pole the guy that lived there pulled out his tractor trailer and pulled me off the pole i continued my journey as the night is shiny smashed armor i make it to the waffle house and pick her up her door doesn't open because it was smashed in she climbs over from the other side casually brushing aside bits of broken glass from the shattered window we proceed to drive 25 minutes in the snow while freezing air tossing her post surgery bed head hair around we made casual conversation we get to her house and i get out so she can climb back over my seat to get out she thanks me and we part ways come to find out my truck's frame was bent and should not have been driven four years later we're happily married going through ivf to have a daughter tl doctor wrecked my car to save her in a snowstorm she acted like it was normal and not cold sitting next to a broken window i married her i picked up this one girl from her house and she fell asleep until we got to the restaurant while talking before the date he explained that he doesn't drink or smoke or do any hard drugs while on the date he tells me he is going to drop acid tomorrow when i brought up what he previously said he argued with me about how sugar is more of a drug than acid sure buddy we were at a soccer game and he became aggressive and started making weird grunting noises the worst part i overheard the people behind us say oh look these two are on a first date it's not going well do you see how uncomfortable she looks hilarious now but painfully awkward at the time went to a local cafe date went well until she flipped the crazy switch she started inquiring when we would get an apartment together as well as have children also how many children we would have she ended up messaging every day multiple times a day wondering why i didn't want to talk to her i ended up calling her and just telling her it wasn't going to work she flipped and told me our relationship was built in lies and she was breaking up with me we went on one date met a guy on tinder we talked for a while on fb before meeting he decides to come to my work for my lunch break i was working third shift at the time so this was at like 3 am i hung out in his car in complete silence while he played on his phone then he started to show me pictures of real dead bodies on his phone i hopped out of his car so fast that was my first and last tinder date we had met briefly before and she stopped by my house before we went out to eat as she apparently lived close by we spoke for like 90 seconds then she asked to use my bathroom she must have been in there for an hour i knocked to see if she was okay and she didn't answer after a while i knocked again a little worried that she fainted in my bathroom or something after like five or ten minutes of knocking on the door and her not replying i was getting worried i had sudden fear that she was deaf or something and hadn't told me and couldn't hear me so i tried to call her phone and i would hear it ring once inside and vibrate then get muted i was very confused and worried but i could still sort of hear her moving around on the other side of the door i was at that point even saying stuff like uh look if something embarrassing has happened in there just don't worry about it just let me know you're okay and i'll pass you in whatever you need just no reply i started opening the door from the outside with a screwdriver panicking and just as i got the door open she just quietly said occupied like you might say in a public bathroom i opened the door and she was standing in front of the mirror doing something with her makeup but didn't seem to be actually wearing any makeup having been in the bathroom for like an hour i was like what the hell and she was just like are we late for dinner edit row this one sure got lots of replies there's no exciting ending to the story she wouldn't explain why she was acting so weird and we'd literally just met so i noped out of that whole situation and kicked her out some time later i happened to be talking to a friend who is a cop about it and his instinct was that it might have been some sort of setup for a robbery that is she left the doors jammed open for others to follow her in or at least she was scoping the place out and something went wrong for example her accomplices never showed or she chickened out guy attempted to put his hand up my skirt as a way of confirming that that was how i had been assaulted on a train a few years prior edit to add context below because somehow a number of people are seeing this as my own fault partially because it would have been a turn off for the date in question him do you drive into work me yep how about you him public transport how come you don't take the train me ah i'm not a fan of public transport and besides i have free parking at work so it's win-win for me him how come you don't like public transport me ah a few years ago some douchebag stuck his hand up my skirt when i was getting off the train so anyway kim did he do it like this he then proceeded to put his hand up my skirt while we were sitting down on a park bench and got high enough to touch the gusset of my stockings [Music] about 15 minutes and we were discussing travel and we'd both been to amsterdam and then he said this is probably more of a second date conversation but when i was in amsterdam two hookers blew me while my girlfriend waited in the room i guess it was raining outside so his gf waited in the room the chick went on for an hour about sloths worst date i went on hands down a guy acted incredibly interested in me and i gave him a shot told me he didn't have any money for a date fine we are in college i get it proceeds to show up i pay for him the whole time everything is going great asks to see me again next day doesn't even talk to me hope the free food was worth it for the record i am female i matched with a guy i went to high school with and who i always thought was really good looking and really cool played sports well liked by everyone etc i probably hadn't seen him in two years at this point but in his tinder pictures he still looked the same so we agreed to meet up for coffee he comes in with greasy long hair a beard and actually looked homeless and went on to tell me that he dropped out of college and has severe adhd now he couldn't focus on one thing and was fidgeting the entire date told me how he's now one with the earth and at the end of it told me he was gay i'm a girl i seriously thought i was being punked we went to a pond and looked for frogs and stuff we saw beaver it was great not traditional but perfect for me she was using pics about a year ago she had awesome text game found out she had a form of autism she was much bigger she was smoking cigs and was dying of cancer i tried to be nice for the rest of the night turns out she was just broke and really wanted a free meal i found out almost instantly when she devoured almost every role at red lobster in like two minutes i called her back my first ever tinder date was with a guy from romania he was kind of cute and i thought it was cool that he was from another country we'd been texting for a week or so and he seemed interesting we met at a festival and the first thing that i noticed was that he was about eight inches shorter than i'd expected and didn't look much like he did in photos not a huge deal a lot of people looked different in photos he also had way too much growth smelling cologne after hurrying through the festival we sat and chatted for a while and i told him about how i love children and animals he proceeded to tell me that when he lived in romania he used to like to pick cats up by their tails and throw them on top of houses and that it didn't really hurt them he also said that he thought americans needed to beat their kids more after the conversation died down awkwardly i made some excuse about needing to go home to my surprise he still wanted a second date the next guy i met on tinder ended up being the absolute best date i've ever been on and we've been together for almost three years now when i was a freshman in college i went on a coffee date with a guy who had lied about his age he was 10 years older than i thought he was turned out he was an english teacher for high school seniors i was essentially the same age as his students gross i was the weirdest hindu date someone had been on he was intelligent handsome and very interesting to talk to capital i however was so gore and nervous about meeting him whenever he asked me a question about myself i would move my hands about like i was doing the vogue dance move we were drinking tea at my favorite tea shop which was right beside the hospital he worked at and i could not quell my hands i'm sure i looked like an italian man on speed because my anxiety was at an all-time high and this guy was insanely out of my league and everything combined made for a really uncomfortable date the real reason i've been single for three years i'm better now but still can't talk to attractive people without completely tripping over my words i've stopped gesticulating as much since i accidentally hit another date in the face but that is another awful story this was a few dates in the parents invited us over for dinner and to watch a movie so i bring her on over to meet the folks among many things my mom had made deviled eggs right around two dozen of them now unknown to me this girl's crypt tonight was deviled eggs in the span of 40 minutes she had consumed about 20 of them she was decently fit but could eat like a mofo about halfway through the movie she starts sitting rather awkwardly looking like something was up shortly after she excuses herself to the bathroom where she remains for about 20 minutes comes out says she's not feeling well and needs to head out so i see her out the door to her car upon returning inside i walked by the bathroom she had inhabited mother of god the smell coming out of that dead zone could only be rivaled by a world war one battlefield in the heat of summer it's a miracle there was any paint on the walls after the cloud of acid her rectum had released after two bottles of lysol and an hour with the fan on i went in for a damage assessment not only did she kill two full rolls of toilet paper she went after an entire box of baby wipes may god have mercy on her [ __ ] because it got some mileage that time banged this chick on the beach at 4am and then had to walk through cvs with my clothes drenched in seawater and my jeans half rolled up to ask the old lady working there where the plan b is it was awkward she had also previously tried to get me to duck her in a public pool filled with children and i had to explain to her that in the us you get killed in jail for it like that she was from peru i was newly single just after tinder took off the relationship i was in was boring dull and defeating so i was looking to do some stupid it for a while that led me to matching with interesting folk but i wanted to have some experiences one woman a little older than me wiggin hippie crazy perfect we hooked up the day we matched she was doing things i'd only ever read about a part of me was scared but like i said i was itching for some good times week or so later she asks if i want to go for a hike sure on the hike asks if i want to drop acid sure mid-trip she gets naked tells me to follow suit then brings me to a clearing in the bush for a ritual hard no in my acid trip mind this was where she cuts me open and sacrifices my body to be elsibob or summit i bailed half closed and tripping right out retrospect we were likely about to have some earth-shattering hippy acid six in the wild but as i found my way back home i was looking over my shoulder for the main and true detective s3 never talk to her again i did see her on tinder later and i think she found jesus went on a date with this cute girl we talked about an hour and she felt more fascinated when i brought up my cats she was very eager to meet them so we proceeded to go to my place spent few hours just playing with my cats she was about to leave and before she put her shoes on to go she says to me oh i forgot something and went to grab my youngest kitten during the time four months old and picked him up and wanted to walk out with him i stopped her and told her what was she doing to her reply i thought you let me adopted him like girl follow first date after my ex and me broke up i had spoken to her okay both tinder and snapchat for a couple of weeks until the date i get to the date and she looks nothing like her profile pics or snaps we have the date and she even asks me about profile pics and says i look more handsome ireland on the picks i however can't get myself to lie but neither do i want to hurt her feeling so i kinda just answer thank you without repaying the compliment after the date i go in to give her a hug and she pulls me in to kiss me after that i just hurried off 10 minutes later she sends me a snap selfie and once again i'm dumbfounded because it just doesn't look like her she had mastered the art of just the most perfect angle to look 10 times hotter in the photos than i roll i've been on one tinder date she didn't look anything like the pics she was much worse we went to the mall and for ice cream and after that she took us to toys r us she was just walking around looking at the toys i'm not really a rude person so i stuck with it but it was just terrible and installed tinder after that right before the date she asked me if i could pick her up i told her i don't have a car i'm from europe and my city has good public transportation so no need for a car during the day she kept mentioning how cool it would be if you had a car and even tried telling me about car sharing services and how i should be using them she also repeatedly asked me what i thought of her during and after the date we never met again though i was new to the area so she picked me up to take me to her favorite bar for a couple drinks in the back seat there were two other girls that were her friends about five minutes into the drive one of the girls in the back says we should play truth or dare on the drive to the bar so we start to play and everyone picked truth the first round so when it was my turn again i said truth again and my date said that i can pick truth twice in a row and i have to do a dare so i said okay and that i will do a dare then one of her friends in the back said we dare you to walk down the street naked and i just laughed because i thought it was a joke but then my date pulled the car over to the side of the road and they were all saying i had to do it or they would just bring me back home so after a few minutes i finally gave in and got out of the car and got fully naked and started to walk down the street they then picked up my clothes and drove right next to me until we got to an intersecting then they all got out and said i could have my clothes back once they all get a picture for snapchat after that we got in the car and went to the bar after that we dated for five months not weirdest but most interesting for sure went on a date with a pretty good looking chick off of there everything went fine then she had me over we went to her room and instead of six we started talking about what we do and she dropped the bomb that she's a cam general and does porn for some pretty big companies i specifically remember naughty america being one of them we spent the next like hour watching her get played and asking her questions about the behind the scenes of porn she brought a stuffed shark i'm fine with that i understand the importance of comfort and therapy stuff we talked in a cafe for a bit we talked about past trauma she talked in a loud voice very very loudly discussing being molested raped etc etc all right we all need someone to confide in we all need someone to support us but can you keep it down finished up at the cafe politely we ended up in the back of her car oh with her stuffed shark me still chatting about some super deep stuff then she asked me can you abuse me i told her we could make out for a bit but i really didn't feel comfortable just super awkward all around i hope she finds happiness and comfort in the future i have only been on one tinder date because it was so awful not super weird just bad after he completely unprompted explained to me how feminism doesn't make sense because feminism doesn't take into account that men work harder than women he also told me how he is no longer a homophobe because he decided all homophobes are closet cases he literally stopped actively hating on gay folk because he was worried that would make him look gay he also started almost every sentence afterwards with as a former homophobe i deleted the app edit i date guys sometimes but i'm not exactly straight yeah it came up yeah it was as awkward as you're imagining i'm also heavily involved in the queer community an interesting sounding guy agreed to meet me in the sci-fi section of a bonds and noble good so far he was running late fine we meet up and he seems kind of shy and insecure fine he's heard of none of the books i've read even the classics and can't tell me anything that he likes other than semi-explicit manga not so good we'd go to the cafe to talk and he insists i order some super sweet secret menu frappucino i pay starting to feel a bit weird we started to talk he brings up in turn politics and video games the rub he basically quotes john oliver and markiplier respectively i tell him i've seen those shows and ask about movies and says he doesn't really watch them trying to avoid a walk home in the rain i ask about family he shrugs it off at that point it was so awkward that i left better to endure a stroll in the rain than so much strange unoriginal mediocrity met this girl on tinder and she invited me over for a massage so i get there and there is just something totally off about her i don't know what it is i mean she looks normal but something about her was just really unsettling anyway i go to the bathroom and when i get back she is sitting on the couch looking at me with a big glass of wine saying i poured you some wine all i can think is nope i'm not drinking it i don't wanna wake up missing a kidney so i noped out of there probably just me letting my paranoia ruin a sure thing but idk there was just something really weird about her i think i need to read through these stories before a date it's given me a lot of confidence just knowing that i'll never come close to ducking up a date this bad i had been on a few dates with a guy i meant on tinder and things seemed to be going really well we had common interests he was funny smart attractive and incredibly kind one evening he invited me over to his house we had always had public dates beforehand and i agreed the night started out great he cooked dinner we watched a movie and things started to lead towards the bedroom before we got there he asked if he could show me his favorite room in the house somewhat confused i agreed he opened a door beside his bedroom and we walked into a baby nursery not just any nursery a nursery with an adult-sized crib changing table diapers etc he told me that he was into baby role playing and would be very happy if i would agree to be his mommy i'm a very open-minded person but that's not something i would be able to do for him and politely excused myself he messaged me the next day asking if i would reconsider and i once again politely told him that we could no longer see each other looked cute on her profile ended up not being true turns out she was also mentally not all there there was obvious signs of retardation sorry if that's not pc and was showing me pictures of her and grown toenails the doctor pulled out of her while we were dining by the end of the diner she had moved to sit next to me on my side of the booth that was it for me i told her i had to go to work and gtfo that was the last time i told a girl i'd pay for her on the first date posted this here before on a different account but this story was fun so here we go meet up with this guy at a local bar to get some beers and lunch dates going great so far we're vibing pretty well joking around and getting into conversations without the awkward small talk halfway through the date we're talking about things we daydream about i told him about my dreams of being a musician then asked him about his his eyes get really dark as he says i like to fantasize about the light leaving my enemy's eyes at my hands at first i'll laugh because i think he's kidding but he keeps a straight face i clear my throat and don't know what to say so all that comes out it i doubt how do you do it without even a moment's hesitation he answers harpoon yeah there wasn't a second date after that ha ha not that weird more just awkward i went on a date with a guy who had put that he was polyamorous in his bio and i'm polly too it's hard to find guys who are okay with that at least in my experience so i was excited we met up a bar and it quickly became obvious that polyamory was his long-term girlfriend's idea and he was reluctantly giving it a try to please her it kind of made me sad he seemed so devoted to her and i kind of felt like the date was an obligation for him but he was sweet and friendly we never saw each other again after that but i hope he figured things out girl was morbidly obese not apparent from the pics but i didn't know pout pierced tattooed and heavily into j-rock which isn't necessarily a bad thing just painting a picture she was also a heavy and loud breather like non-stop was very aggressive and ranting on twitter but was very shy and reserved in real life except for the very big push-up bra she didn't really had anything to say and dhe didn't contribute to conversations she mostly okay at everything or just responded with three-word sentences i paid oa 90 for the food at the japanese restaurant snd later went home with her to watch a netflix movie she had condoms hidden in her bed blanket and probably expected to have six but after the movie i decided to go home also she turned out to have schizophrenia and hopelessly unemployed with no real perspective overall it wasn't a too negative experience but not worth it to spend the time and like a90 and the time for someone i never heard of again i was just very nice to her but maybe i should have cancelled it way earlier only tinder date i went to from what i heard a girl's experience on tinder is that there are only weirdos while guys just meet girls being misleading with their picks not sure about the myth of crazy girls you

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Id: E6fWM_ubb0k

Length: 27min 33sec (1653 seconds)

Published: Sun Mar 28 2021