We Improved Ocean Animals

ah people are polluting the ocean and i think i know why the ocean is not being marketed correctly you see a fish and you think to yourself that thing can't even breed air it doesn't even have wireless charging get it out of here and as a result people are throwing trash in the ocean in droves because they don't think the animals are cool enough so i've assembled a team of two animators a gamer a businessman and an engineer in order to help me with the task of redesigning sea life to fit with the times enjoy the video because this got weird today i've assembled the most crack job team of influencers in order to see if we can do some rebranding on sea life i'm happy to do it for the ocean i know what animals need big fat nuts and i wouldn't have expected anything else let me reveal to you right now the god of this video behold wow oh [ __ ] we're gonna be spinning this for each of you each of us is gonna get a sea animal to recreate and then we're gonna present upon it ah let me rip william osman [Applause] please be turtle oh well i'll take it oh it's probably the second closest to a turtle yeah i'll go next oh the turtle suck it william damn it that's mine thank you i want next i better get the seagull you got a killer whale jaden i want the swordfish but the odds do not look stacked in my favor hey i believe in fate now give me the spin baby give me the spin you got a stingray oh stingray finally for me oh [ __ ] i'll be getting an octopus what are we trying to improve with the animal is it to help the sea or is it helping them with marketing people don't give a [ __ ] about the sea animals that we see nowadays yeah maybe if we improve these animals i'd stop littering that's what i'm thinking maybe i'd stop drinking out of plastic straws slat walks along the beach and he just finds some baby sea turtles and he gets them early my animal you're talking about there buddy what i'm looking for is some potentially drastic changes to these animals to just make them better okay whatever better means to you [Laughter] is perfect for me so i have a stingray steve irwin's death practically 9 11. the stingray's reputation has been destroyed irreparably but what if we turn it into something that people can respect i got a whale i got a whale um how do i make a whale more marketable we're making it so that people don't throw trash into the ocean what if we made it so the whale could eat trash let's make the whaley trash i got the killer whale and i think the best way to improve this animal is to keep it in a cage away from all the other animals like they did with the shamu i got a sea turtle i immediately thought of sea turtle i thought to myself i thought of that cute video there's that straw stuck inside the sea turtle's nose and it was really it was like really bloody you know you remember that well i'm gonna repurpose the sea turtle to harvest as much plastic as possible they thrive on it we're gonna condition them to really clean up this ocean so i got the seagull seagull problems they [ __ ] on people they're noisy they got loud feet apparently they'll take roofs apart to make their own house nuisances i guess for my animal i got the octopus which is sort of the [ __ ] dick of the sea octopuses can fit into lots of small tiny spaces they're a little bit cowardly they've got so many tails to them that i don't really know what to do with that what the [ __ ] am i gonna do with an octopus so all the designers have now finished their sea animals how do you guys feel feeling really really confident about my new little sea creature i'm feeling equally as confident in my new sea creature oh really yes i sure tried my best [Laughter] before we show any images can we put this gif in the video that i found today oh dude i love it the way you say found makes me think you filmed that where did you find this i want to pop its [ __ ] eyeball out put it like put in my mouth give it a little like moisturize with my tongue we need to make a 20 foot tall version of him at any major dumping side of the ocean as just this obelisk that he just looks like he looks judgingly like god my name is william i'm 10 years old for my project i use my engineering skills to create a a whale it's conservation and recycling oh my god uh the oh oh nice so we made the whale better because it solves its own problems we we um instead of putting plastic in the ocean we put the plastic into the whales we have to make the stomach really big though because it takes hundreds of years to decompose and digest garbage and then we give it uh it does feel shredder for teeth it can just go around eating garbage and and how long the whales live hundreds of years shortly very long with plastic in their stomachs well it's food instead of giving it to all the sea animals we give it to the whales right what happens when they die did you see that whale that washed up on the coast of a beach and exploded imagine you explode a whale and then all the trash comes out i didn't think that far ahead but i like the idea of exploding the whales when they die yeah they go to the surface and then [ __ ] explode put garbage everywhere it's the second d-day [Laughter] i give this one three harpoons i'd like to give it six plastic rings four out of five plastic rings let's go i had the sea turtle i think a big reason that people don't care they look like underwater turkeys they look like birds i'd like to humanize the face and make it look like a baby baby oh my god dude take that in this is a nightmare so you make you make the face look like a baby because people get very very salty if you mess with the baby he has this giant mouth which he eats trash but then also with plastic bags he puts it around his neck and the more plastic bags they have around their neck is more powerful they are it's like a warrior status so then if a little kid's like mommy i did the the turtle has it's good things like an alpha of the pack absolutely the straws are you know they get stuck in the nose as well but once again it's more of a warrior it looks more like tusks this time for intimidation you've reconstructed the entire social hierarchy of a sea turtle in like 20 minutes this is incredible that's what the criteria was honestly the shade of green i think it's it's just not quite turtle green so i'm gonna have to give it a three and a half three and a half well i thought that if i made it to flush tony it would look like an actual like baby highlight so i was trying to make them a bit more turtleness with the green i will say i'm not a fan of babies i think the turtle looked much better as a turtle that's sort of a curveball that jayden just [ __ ] hates babies no it's not a secret i'm honest about it you're not afraid to kick a baby push your thumb into its soft temple i got the stingray we all know that there are issues with stingrays they're [ __ ] boring the reputation has been tarnished because everybody sees them as a murderer they're really poor and they're they're discussing the grimy and they're dirty financially nobody likes them i've genetically engineered it and also culturally engineered it it is now a bling ring while you may have a stingray that is marred with a bad reputation of being a murderous creature bling ray takes that to his advantage so he goes around he looks for jewelry we're like sunken treasure to where everybody respects him everyone adores him he raps about his murder i in this way everybody looks at his crime and they go well this guy is [ __ ] red she's filled with paladin and he's a cold-blooded killer i'm cruising through the wreath all the fish see me swerving i drop bars harder than i dropped barbs and erwin that was great thank you thank you you have the full package you have the name beautiful brand i see that on a t-shirt at macy's you have you have great jewelry on him but is he friendly with people if somebody's you know snorkeling by what does he do he only protects his property if someone tries to take his bling away of course he's going to go down swinging as long as like the snorkeler the scuba diver comes by they they go yo bro nice playing i [ __ ] respect you'd be like i i [ __ ] with you and then you know you'll swim away i'm gonna go 3.5 because i feel like this this is a very arrogant fish i feel like he brings up that he got in on bitcoin very early frequently my name is ted and i had the octopus one of the things i realize about the octopus is that it is sort of a terrifying beast we all know that octopus can open up jars they can fit into small spaces and i think that that's sort of an overwhelming thing for the public when in reality they should just be swimming around in the ocean doing their thing i don't like octopus so introducing uno puss look at him because eight arms it's just a lot it's true simplicity one arm rather than eight if you can't count up to eight surely you can count to one this is brave ted this is like when apple removed the headphone jam yeah it looks a little bit too sperm-like that is a problem okay i didn't think about it until you brought it up think about it this way we're trying to impregnate joy into the hearts and minds [Music] who what is your demographic a bit aggressive most men would look at this and think first thing competition does it wirelessly charge yes five five kind of feels like you just took an octopus and cut seven legs off of it ted i mean hey shut the [ __ ] up william it takes a lot of courage to remove features all right i'm the apple of the future it takes a lot of courage it's a good idea i just feel like well yeah it takes a lot of courage to take an octopus into the ocean and cut off seven of its [ __ ] arms we're doing this to every single one that's something fauci would do i don't even know what to say to someone so as you guys know i had the killer whale i mean it's in the name folks i mean killer whales scary do you think this thing is going to kill me and so if we're trying to make the water a better place bring them back to where they belong the cages oh my god mr beast sea world two we put them back in the cages and they're never gonna be a problem again you can see we have a nice display there's some kids having a great time bring me from my don't worry it's having a good time it's a very small tank it's not as small it is just as big as it needs to be the whale is having a great time why is this new sea world in new jersey there's no splash soon listen there'll be a splash zone in a couple more hits there will be a splash i guarantee you can i cast my vote right now yeah this was a haunting experience i'm going to give it a 0.5 because i really like the stock the stock children everything else though haunting you know we're trying to rebrand the ocean this is the other we're trying to fix the ocean i gave you the honor of having a half a point from me and that's what i gave you you have no idea what you're talking about i mean the person you're trying to help is bleeding profusely that's not my fault that's directly your fault you were the one who made this image also got like the 1950s broadway new york times square [ __ ] lights around the side it's like king kong or some [ __ ] i give a two c stories and a fine why am i getting such low reviews i'd actually give this a 3.5 thank you there's a demonstration here that there is an investment in the hearts and minds of the children of the future who will be yes they're going to be cleaning up trash because when you say cleaning up trash are you also talking about all of the fumes and toxins that are going on in the air this is about the ocean i was just making sure this was about the ocean the birds will have their day i've got a little bit of a powerpoint presentation oh [ __ ] mine was the seagull i did a little bit of research they take roofs and like use the shingles or something from the article i read yeah she went on [ __ ] seagulls.com the wings seemed like a big problem the roof thing and the the freedom remove wings so i came up with the blade oh my god it can't choke on the plastic anymore no wings at all the wings and the feet were the problems so what does it make sound rollerblades he just scoots around like a little guy on the beach on the santa monica pier whatever they consume goes straight to the battery renewable energy it charges itself wait hold on this is actually more [ __ ] up than i thought jane you're making it eat trash yeah unless it dies if it doesn't eat enough trash it loses all of its power and kills over what's the time for 0-60 it's similar to a tesla how does it exist with man um how many how many birds are usually on one beach you're gonna have a bunch of these piling up like it's a west coast city and [ __ ] uber scooters are all over the place yeah which is why i can't give it anything more than like a three and a half i'm gonna give it a four the big problem that you uh solved is not getting [ __ ] on your shoulders or head true and then riding around like a scooter well ladies and germs this has been a wonderful experience i think we figured out how to properly market these ocean animals we're gonna start rolling these out as soon as we can we're trying to remove 30 million pounds of trash out of the ocean by raising 30 million dollars so if you're interested in that as a goal consider donating great cause for every dollar you donate mr beast will throw two pounds of trash into that that's a lie i will kill every sea animal before every dollar donated ted will take with my two hands and crack its neck and then twirl it around like a lasso visceral i'm gonna dump radioactive mess into the into the long island sound it's worse than thanks for watching everyone peace out [Music] you

Channel: Ted Nivison

Views: 2,567,858

Keywords: JehBerDeh, TedNivison, Ted, Nivison, We Redesigned Ocean Animals, TeamSeas, We, Redesigned, Ocean, Animals

Id: HbV9FE8fxM0

Length: 14min 54sec (894 seconds)

Published: Sat Nov 06 2021