Theo Von & The Peace Meats | TigerBelly 96

[Music] [Music] all I really want I know but I told you to not say nothing until I [ __ ] introduce you dude he's looking five four three two when he does the [ __ ] thing dude all right all right hey man look at me steal you know him good huh yeah you don't get it all right what do we get into it you know I know I know what you're saying go ahead 5 4 3 2 1 2 3 4 5 4 3 2 1 2 3 welcome to you do the thing welcome to let us find Jesus Jesus loves everyone in this room and the Lord is in this room right now I can feel it his energy and his arm it's even the Lord his energy and we're all connected by a a man bro he [ __ ] I told you not to talk and to introduce your life sorry that's okay he's looking at me kinda is welcome to another edition of the tiger belly and that's what it is and I got like a see you know yeah and the thing is is that um you know I tell the guests to do certain things like shut the [ __ ] up until introduced um and they say things but it's fine because the thing is that I want to let everyone in this room know that I'm still the captain of the ship and I'm still your leader and you do as I say you hear me white boy yeah and bro dan and I we got that beautiful girl right here is not my job we got [ __ ] kalila we got what's Gilbert yep he's my sidekick yeah Brianna you know Jason Priestley of sky can you see it a little yeah Jason Priestley of cyan man and we got huge heart man no see oh [ __ ] involved raw ham talk dude thank you for having me today only beautiful in here it's a lot it smells a lot more virile in here than I don't who would it mean just more it smells like there's more and hidden animals in here I write and I think that I have them as pets or other things I don't know yeah I think you I can imagine you've been through a lot with different animals but I uh I'm happy to be your man I appreciate you having me yeah I love animals and I love you I've always loved you man I don't know when I met you one that I meet you hmm sounds like how big you were whenever we met probably same size so probably maybe six years yeah I've never grown in a long time you know me but when I met you I went father's this white dude right here is he funny my son go up man dang you sound very high a Latin King Penelope a bro bro bro just gotta be okay this [ __ ] is he funny work right urban ball yo everybody unstable [ __ ] do everything yeah by killing that guy Hawaiian my economy [ __ ] you went up there dude he [ __ ] got weird [ __ ] wrong action his point of view and [ __ ] about like what he saw my [ __ ] pidgin area is about all I'm talking about it's uncle and chimes I'm not all kinds of [ __ ] doing I was like dude he's one of us bro yeah and I saw him another time do him and I did some jerk me off by a dumpster oh yeah I did you I did do that excuse me what we work together we work together where I had a jerk Co off oh I didn't literally jerk him off at a dumpster dude you do what I do in the hotel room ah fine for now ba but it was miser we really I think we thought but you know what I'm saying yeah we really did it yeah I don't have any I hardly have any feelings left in my penis anyway I feel like at this age to be honest oh really and I'm not trying to be weird way because of a lot of masturbation or you you get a lot of girls I think it's a mix of everything man you know I've been with some decent women and some just troubled women and some undervalued women oh my god yeah and you still you still hook up with the ugly ones or what no these days I mean you know I try to find uh that you know a little bit of beauty and everybody but sometimes you got to really get in there to see it yeah what do you mean yeah I mean like right I know what you're saying what you're saying is to me of this it's like you're okay you meet Agron line whatever yeah and their face is fine legit right and then their body is legit right then you get them naked and then some legit is that what you're saying yeah the foundation is weak all right whatever I always said you can't build a house on sand on accept and core what was built on sand Angkor Wat and Komodo what okay call your handbill and the guy right here I know right here man really from [ __ ] Thailand right man yeah yeah Razia yes oh no no no no that guy look like you but you you don't trust somebody when you look out be real you want honesty know how gay when I'm gonna see him I think that you know he probably grew up in a place and had like a lot of chimes and stuff yeah and a lot of cartons on rugs on the wall yeah yeah yeah yeah ceiling on the flooring you know yeah I know what you're saying though they mix match a lot of places they put rugs on the wall instead of the floor with what is the kitchen look yeah on the kitchen a lot of utensils yes so yes yeah I'm giant we're one giant chillin right yeah yeah a couple of older Sammy's that look either that could be men or women how do my dad or my parents talk they don't talk anymore yeah lookers do lookink oh yeah I just read all kinds of through the eyes my bro yeah but there's a lot of love and there but the lows all its a lot of loves historical so it's already been built in you're not getting like a lot of it these days it's just kind of no yeah but it's really no no you feel it yeah yeah I when I first met you dude I didn't trust you yeah because you came in there like a [ __ ] yellow butterfly you gonna dip it in zip in and out what is the zip intensive and laughs hey babe ginger yeah yeah with the ginger maggot it's somebody that uh I'm hot I've got somebody my kindred town some sick ginger bro and I've been on that for like two days like real ginger the root yeah good meal from Hawaii I wouldn't say Hawaii I am Siam nobody wait somewhere closer than they came into town are you being real you can town this guy actual rule ginger root stuff McGee can't even close your eyes did I think not and they can make a juice out of it at what you do some some you eat if you get like reeling it in inside part you eat it you juice some of it you can cut it up and put it in a eggs but it's strong Bo yeah make your neck bro bro yeah the rest in the room I love ginger myself dude yeah if you read they used to go it was a sign that said we only have Hawaiian ginger and that for some reason just because they put the sign up made it seem even more potent yeah like you're right if they hadn't put on they're like all this is regular ginger yeah but they do it was like a warning we only have Hawaiian ginger yeah which scared the [ __ ] out of us let's drink it anyway you know me that's a gay maker right there ginger boy if you had to pick one spice it's a real gay maker I think what do you mean by that much just you get enough ginger in you man you don't even see gender really yeah yeah maybe we'll talk ahead yeah you'll [ __ ] a damn breeze Charlie you're trying to [ __ ] a breeze past yeah let me ask you something man you'll [ __ ] anything I feel stick around your body yeah be a strong breeze a mist yo yo do you weird guy huh yeah you know what I thought you were unique Bobby was when you got when you have that all talked about on stage when you said you got molested you know yeah yeah because I dealt with a mentally handicapped we have a bunch of mentally handicapped by us when I was growing up and they were wild what do you want Lou said this one man was a farmer I guess supposedly livestock so yeah you know living crops yeah yeah yeah and he uh he had a couple of mental sons and they called him minerals or Tizen if somebody has hism that's when they yeah had autism but they didn't want to make it fancy autism so French really right so you just had that ISM yeah you know his them and we had a couple [ __ ] sons and I don't mean to say if anybody is [ __ ] I'm not talking about you I'm talking about these other [ __ ] people that I knew when I was and he he had two [ __ ] son don't always be on horseback and so they were yeah because they were livestock yeah yeah and then I throw a lot of song a livestock he's too busy trying to so what do they do to you anybody anything no well they had one of them eventually got her injured I guess he got injured somehow and then they got him a bicycle that had a one of those you know mothers used to have a bicycle with that baby seal on the back yeah yeah yeah with that small baby seat like now they put you in like this covered Conestoga wagon and like you're like there's like roll bars and stuff like I remember back in the day used to like the kid would just be there you got it in the back yeah I still like that like not even in the mother site like yeah yeah just look back to her dunno I was in Thailand just real quick I saw a dude on a moped right he was wearing this [ __ ] motorcycle helmet oh he had a baby on his shoulder baby had no helmet you might as well just take the helmet officer and just tie your baby to your head yeah here's the baby has a helmet right I mean yeah that's bait practice right alright we don't put a helmet on a baby yeah is risky right and then one of these guys got up was mentally challenging he got a bicycle eventually and they gave him they the bike had a like a child mother's baby seat on the back yes and I had never met anybody that was gay they didn't have a lot of gay people in our area and if they did we didn't know about it till were older where did you grow up in Louisiana and they didn't come by and also you know when you grow up in like a rural area like nobody really cares if somebody's gay it's not like they're running around like you don't have a gay pride parade you know there's only two day dudes if they meet up in the street they're probably just gonna a little you know yeah they're not going to put together a whole parade for everybody right right right so um my people said that this man was a homosexual yeah and they didn't have uh and everybody's like wow and they said that they said he had a husband like a little husband that left and that you should sit in that back seat ha ha ha so there was always like a ton of not remorse really I don't know what the feeling is but when you saw this man go by you're like aw that's so sad that is little more like it's remorse yeah it's from or TAS and it was just sad you know because you were like oh this guy's a little husband that left him and so I believe everything you're saying because we watched a documentary called mommy dead and dearest and everyone's from Louisiana but like in the Bayou remember how they yeah they we talked yeah yeah yeah I think that like it's just simpler you just learn things like in a different way you know they're also like I'm sure like you're in a small town the two gauges people know them right right so there's not like it I think in the media when you see like you know Republicans talk right and they talk about you know that they don't believe in you know gay rights or whatever right that's just in the media but I think in small towns they accept them right a hundred percent like that's a crazy thing like the only time anybody ever put anybody on television from my area was when like they needed somebody had seen an alien or something you know yeah otherwise these people are mostly doing good stuff you know yeah it's just like they always good like one or two spots and pick out the worst yeah right and I think they'd do it for almost everything yeah but um you never saw an alien growing up let me thank you know one of my buddies died he was on oxycottons and he choked to death on a some type of a meat bone or something I remember was chicken fowl my beloved um I thought after he died that he came to see me a couple times Oh something always comes out so not alien that you're talking about go tell ghost and you're talking about the paranormal he is talking about not all resurrect real not at church right yeah yeah you're talking about Gosha huh yeah so you he when he came back that he looked like an alien did you look like it well or twos outside as himself I felt like it was him but he seemed a little bit more you know kind of Randi than he used to be a little more active you know because you get a little bit I bet you once you're dead you're like oh I'm free you know get your amistad man you're out of your body you know you're about do you believe in that in afterlife I do because we came here like people I was like you think you go like a magical place in the sky you know and everybody just sitting around and [ __ ] drinking rocket sauce and doing magic you know yeah and I'm like look where I'm at now bro I'm in the middle of [ __ ] about the [ __ ] dirt yeah it happened yeah this the only proof I have so do I think something like this could happen again yeah I have to think that so I'm giving like you think you go to a crate a place where this is a bunch of other people that you don't know like if you're talking about heaven you know and everybody's doing good and I'm like yeah we just like here but everybody would be doing good you know yeah yeah yeah so I base it on it's almost more like reincarnation a little bit yeah you I you know I don't necessarily like geared towards always believing in things that are factual and or but Wow but too small oh but I do believe in like sort of like the paranormal stuff because when you live in a big city like this you're so all your senses are drowned out constantly by the noise of traffic by people around you it's always chaotic but when I go back to the provincial areas and the Philippines who do send something different there you hear things more you feel things more yeah and I always get sort of a sense of like that paranormal stuff when I'm back there but never here in LA I can just call it boredom it's not boredom you think that's wrong yeah you think goes come here here I wake up no this is what happens la I wake up a [ __ ] I'm gonna go here I go to a Starbucks I go to the iPad store get my sync screen fixed you me and I'm gonna go see uh Joe some friend yeah I'm gonna [ __ ] bait store yeah right and then you go to an a meeting that I got two shows to do yeah you got [ __ ] to do over there you wake up there's nothing to do well I see a ghost oh I see you're just in time yeah it's like something like Oh what are we going to do today I'm going to do it right Zach there's nothing to do your mind and right am I not right babe or no no oh okay I just really you kind of reinforce what I was saying which is you don't allow yourself to feel anything because you pack your day with so much and your feelings here it's hard to get your feelings have no space here like I can't even feel that much here you know like I'm far more I noticed what soon as I get outside of the city limits I'm far more and you know I'm not trying to be profane buddy erect your dick has feeling again yes my life has feeling again like I don't see how people have any feet there's no room for your feelings here there's just no you can't relax I can't anyway maybe if you were brought up in this type of environment yeah I'm like that in New York really yeah if I'm waking one like when I wake up in a hotel room in New York with all the noise and all that stuff I could probably sleep for four hours Wow am I just walking around why I just cannot sleep hmm it just it does excitement in the air that [ __ ] to do I don't know one time I was in [ __ ] New York and I meet I don't know how I ran into if I ran into Maz Jobrani hmm he's like Indian or some [ __ ] yeah what is it uh Pakistani or whatever and he goes he goes eh dude you want to go to a Moroccan like nightclub but it's like invite-only and it's illegal I want to go I want to go when those two things Moroccan illegal I have to go okay all right there's a two-element baby I'm there okay and which alleyway down these steps to a red door we walk in and then there's like a fire right and there's people with bongo drums the total you get right a tribal man right right right yeah smoking like see yes it's smoking thing and people are dancing right and I just started dancing I start dancing too because I didn't know what the [ __ ] to do I'll scare ya right because mas started to I think on that was there - oh I meant right wait you gotta can't ya know is there I got right and that's what to me New York is you know so when I'm in LA I feel relaxed mm-hmm right and if I go to like wherever you're from I probably go into coma yeah yeah I probably go into coma and never wake up again haha yeah a [ __ ] sounds that Calma sounds boring we didn't have a lot of Asians man we had a there was a rumor of an Asian when I was going to make I'm not sure it was a rumor of a rumor was and I've talked about this before I talked about this before they had yeah they had a rumor that there was an asian kid right missus after because we got a Latino kid we got a Latina yeah they not a family drag one kid when graduation one guy one guy Nicholas was his name in a little bit of like facial hair or less everybody was fired up about that hired there was a lot of rumors and stuff going on about that yeah um because yeah people had never seen that on children you know would be light hair on the face yeah like yeah people are like he's trying to grow a sideburn on his on his chin yeah so then I was on the wrestling team in middle school kind of sweet as a defeatist right there because Penasquitos was 60% Filipino their wrestling team all the kids had mustaches oh yeah Filipinos have most fashions by the time they're living I mean I you barely we're female and male is it like a handprint like a fingerprint we just grow mustaches like nothing but we don't really grow the rest though what we are like Manny Pacquiao mustaches we all even the female yeah yeah yeah yeah but I remember like wrestling against them with the first time and they all have moustaches right and we don't oh yeah we're like we're kids your little bro yeah yeah alright but our team was so good yeah that we we beat them even me I can't crush them yeah my brother who never ever did on Chris's that his name of Steve Steve well there's only three that's Joey yes Jesus correct the people who killed Steve almost killed a Filipino out there um but my brother had no facial hair here's this old man with a mustache that he's fighting against oh wrestling like I might put the snapped him on the ground we're like yeah man yeah man yeah I'm only 14 I know but it was amazing but anyway so anyway so the picture will the rumor of the Asian though you heard a rumor yeah it had a rumor that there was an Asian boy in Slidell Louisiana which was probably about 17 miles away and so we had to get over there yeah you know we heard up and we thought about it for a couple weeks and then we started mio to my buddy's cut grass man this kid Danny yeah it was a good friend of mine and yet he had a couple different deficiencies but he's doing okay now yeah you know and he um we raised up some money saved up some money over two months and then we called a taxi over there yeah and we went to this place where they're supposed to have you know this asian boy Chet I want to say the name was Chet I'm trying to think off the text somebody changed does that sound okay to change yeah so Chet [ __ ] right over town you ever see him that's not possible at all doesn't sound it sounds it doesn't sound plausible it doesn't sound plausible because I've never met an Asian guy named Chet yeah there are in Southeast Asia there you go either I think it's either Thai or holding m8 bruh Chet makes the room so we got there and he wasn't there it was a wasn't there whatever anyone yeah yeah yeah the name is from the city city of Chester England I know probably oh yeah yeah and uh yeah we went there and was just like a laundromat somebody had opened up like a new laundromat or like a cleaning like a right clothiers there's no with the asian run laundromat I don't know that could have been maybe some house that got diffused when it by the time I got done I'm this way pre-internet you know I write I write this back when what was the first do you remember the first time you ever saw an Asian in the flesh man I feel like it was a man yeah I feel like it was a man with glasses on yeah but you did I could probably draw a picture them but I don't think that I could but I don't think that I could knit tell you when how old are you after that I mean I guess I kind of gave up on it after the after the no-show check yeah but you would think that you know go to again saving up money to have to go see Chet you don't see them that you would yours everything to when you're going to see another a try so that when you see another Asian at airport or whatever you would go oh my god and that would be in your thing but that's fine yeah yeah I remember I went to Africa one time as I got a little bit older and I was like holy [ __ ] you know a lot of Africans are black you know yeah yeah and I was like and that's when I realized like heaven is mostly going to be like black and Asian people you know it's not going to be that many white people there a lot of Indians Chinese and black yeah yeah the pan to be parent they're trying to have a 1 billion india has 1 billion and they're done are they done pretty quick I mean it's gonna be packed up there when you think about you think about this to think about this I thought about this is that you don't hope you know when like white people get pets yeah they do funerals they go we'll see what happened well yeah you think that all the cats are left and dogs there's ever lived on planet Earth I'm going to be in heaven too because if it is I don't want to be there well imagine that just everything that you can all the B's has never existed all the allergies I mean it would be yeah I have to open up a pharmacy up there for people you can't see you can't open a pharmacy Yeah right no you're gonna ruin it oh yeah you can't be this crazy guy who's bringing wood and [ __ ] up sort of business people believe people who do who believe in heaven believe only humans get to go to heaven or did we leave all living things go to heaven what's a good question my belief and I'm not sure exactly where how much of religion was in ER just this idea that I had was that it was me and probably other people that I picked to be there and like my loved ones you know for some reason in my head I feel I'm relying everybody's there okay so how does this work if you've I think I think yo-yos right yeah but you what if those loved ones don't go to heaven if they don't go to heaven and you just get like a memo or something are you here with Howard how did you hear that yeah like a verbal memo yeah I got a written one how does it happen for you then if you can't be with that loved one who didn't make it to heaven then you that's just the way it kind of shakes out happens about 85% of what you want right I don't think a little hundred percent anymore yeah there's so many pinions to be a hundred I think there was a timeless Isle beyond a percent way yeah yeah you know everybody just made it up there everybody in an Internet age right and the night market yeah and it's also how Christians say they say give it what you've done on power how evil you are if you accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior yeah that you will go to heaven yeah so with that in mind you'll you'll be up there with some people that you know don't necessarily want to be around right some killers it took him in at the last minute why right like you know imagine being eaten by Jeffrey Dahmer Yeah right right his fridge up then his fridge make it and they see before he died in prison he accepted Jesus yeah and so now you're chewing on a cloud with Cleopatra and the ones you want to hang out with me a blinking you know no love me you know gave her dirty jobs yeah that guy that guy yeah yeah and then all of a sudden like row yeah Jemima floats by on a cloud I mean how do you feel hmm who are the people you want to see most in heaven top five Oh any side of my family or in history in history like it's like oh you know I know one Lou Reed is one of yours well no I want to change Lou Reed from the Baltimore Ravens who is he was a singer you oh yeah yeah Velvet Underground a part of them yeah yeah I'm trying to think I would probably go Columbus probably why he seems boring Christopher Columbus came on my one man yeah he was a shot you know anyway [ __ ] you you know anything about his personality is aggressive but bro listen to me right all we know about this one right here dad like I we get on the boat I think let's go west yeah right it's so you don't know where he's going to be like in eternity you those little [ __ ] quirks and whatnot no you don't know what he's gonna be like all no one's gonna be like because he's in my [ __ ] top-five Bobby all right right right right right and I like that yeah because here's the thing do to get onto a boat that's the bravest thing and just go somewhere you're not even knowing for sure if like the world is round or flat at that time well they did already know and every more you get up and you have to like kind of make sure one of your buddies doesn't have a disease for you like get real close to him like that's crazy bro curvy nothing kill you dude yeah I cold will kill you you couldn't make why not Magellan then bro Oh Magellan would have been better but he did kill a lot of people too and he cannot of local Filipino them yeah all right my people and also yeah I like Columbus okay kid number two Columbus number two maybe um probably one of the kids from that movie um have you seen the movie with Johnny Depp where he plays Peter Pan yeah Finding Neverland yeah yeah one of the kids from that probably which kids you know the main kid with the freckles like kind of a necessary measure most troubled was like a who else Christian Bale probably okay Ronnie's a straight-up cooter on this a yeah yeah yeah yeah what do we get probably ooh one of the chicks from Friday Night Lights yeah Ali Landry mmm the tall blonde what is the one I win with a whipped cream on her I don't even know I'm talking about the right movie the one well I'm talking about you don't know I don't wait up was a wrong movie I'll see you later so so you know we need a mother figure we need somebody help take care of everyone Judi Dench damn she's not dead yet Jesus she'll be done when he's dead she doesn't seem like she has any mother you don't get her breath yeah that's awesome I can help out yeah um somebody with some yeah Kathy Bay Anna Nicole okay she got slim your 40 year old mill no I don't know whose movie the good yogurt now it's a coca-cola died when she were male fertile and Anna Nicole Smith yeah she seems just like she just be such a pain in the ass you and your boat rods gonna be about her I feel like um yeah I don't feel good mother I don't know Mom let me say something right now dude I ain't gonna visit you and have out say that right now really [ __ ] your [ __ ] people bro who's your people do I have people too bro okay this is an opportunity to tell them that I'll tell you my people do it I'll forget Louie babe okay like Irene Wow yeah yeah yeah you know what I want to go for a bid huh and you have to choose a woman unfortunately and this doesn't well we are here yeah here's the thing though dude it's like in your thing right you don't have so those are the five celebrities or what whatnot right you're gonna have your mom and your dad and everyone else right now yeah so you get to pick five people aside from your family yeah that you're just an overall we wanted to meet in history right the first is Gilbert you can ad on the list he does have to be on my list cuz I'm all ready to see him cuz my friend yeah oh thanks five random people they don't know you're in there like coop like all right let me do mine alright whoa what's so using I think I'm with ruler music I think I would do Pol Pot why tell you why cuz Pol Pot dude he is the scare man yeah yeah he's the heavy hand he's not going to be in head the Rottweiler why would you think Pol Pot's would be in heaven you know except you don't know this when he was in the village in Thailand right if we accepted Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior and he died in Thailand did he really like a DJ oh wow he's a rock well I'll tell you right now Thailand harbored him oh that's right I got to live on a [ __ ] village after I killed two million you know what Gilbert I love you so much thanks man and I find that you are irreplaceable but if you did die how could I replace you I have an idea what maybe there are no ideas zipper crew ah the recruiter yeah it's a virus where basically you can find all the great candidates for his job to replace Gilbert's so for instance if we needed it to hire an animator for our show to animate all 90 hours yeah then we would go on zip recruiter and it posts to all - over like a hundred different job websites and it finds the right candidates for us right that's basically a one-stop shop for all you know everything that you need to find the proper candidate for here job that's really really convenient find out today why is if recruiter has been used by businesses of all sizes to find the most qualified job candidates with immediate results and right now you guys can post jobs on zip recruiter for free that's right a furry just go to zip record icon slash belly fat zip recruiter slash dot-com slash belly one more time to try it for free go to zip recruiter comm slash belly yeah yeah yeah yeah and when people from other countries see you in their country do they feel like they want you to rescues everything like that like was there any stuff like that like take me with you Bobby or take role look in the Philippines yeah remember the [ __ ] hotel guy what happened common innocently the Builder yeah yeah he's like oh so you have a job for me in America uh yeah go what yeah I work very hard you know I go yeah okay here's my number did he call you no I think if I said oh hi bro did you give it up yes I would yeah I mean no ever they're all like that Wow yeah look you know people happiest people I've ever met man yeah if you have them in Louisiana now I did some military tour on this base one time and they had oh just a lot of uh Pinos what are they call them pinoys I know it always yeah I mean you know yeah Filipino Grigio that was my wine that I came out with a long time but uh but they had a lot of Pinos out there and they were good just cool guys you know happy all the same like a kind of like a medium shirt t-shirt all like the exact same kind of chest in arms just have you ever penetrated a asian lady before wrong I remember I made love pretty badly I'm not really good at sex to a Korean girl in Idaho Wow Korean Idol Korean and it was awkward I don't know how much cream was in there but it was nothing I don't you noticed it yeah yeah yeah yeah and I remember her legs she had like legs that were very you know just dirty yes dirty yeah I could rule Korea that's Korea I couldn't get them apart it was a different place chopsticks that like her note is really strong yeah and except for item pick yes yeah yeah well I'm just saying that you want active related to it but you know you forget this chopped in here like aw I can't separate him you know knocking like it was like that man yeah very dated stocky legs bro yeah why did you eventually break the chops down I mean it didn't even matter I mean I am bad at sex so it's like you get a little bit of sex and you know and it's are you really bad or just saying that because you're comedian no I'm pretty bad at it no I was good when I was young when I was young dude [ __ ] yeah you know but yeah but now I probably chat with you yeah possibly we do like some mutual masturbation maybe some sex we mutual masturbation is the best yeah very possible at a certain point it is yeah some of it I think is just kind of evolving you know it's like sometimes I'm like if you're still [ __ ] somebody you're sometimes like just a weirdo I think right yeah sometimes but then sometimes you got to let the beast out of your heart you know and I sometimes you know I just I don't know man it's called it's just so there's so many feeling sometimes going on inside of you when you're trying to deal with like love sex but I'll tell you what I'd revert you know there y know is because the fact that you you got sober yeah and how much sivan do you have now let me see eleven a little over 11 months yeah and when that happened yes your mind clears yeah and new emotions arise you have to learn how to deal with life on life terms yeah and this is what you're dealing with one do you feel more on your dick since you've been so far I feel a little more out of my dick kind of out of now really Oh Odie Odie because I feel like drunk sex I never really feel I can't even like climb nothing there's transects it's just fun the idea it's fun right during but you never remember the actual pleasure from being drunk and having sex you tell in your clothes that's what I like really yeah the crime the idea is interesting but the actual fact the actual part of doing it drunk is only fun at the time that you're drunk that's the only time even remembering it's necklace and fist fighting and [ __ ] armor was more fun when you were drunk you know yeah like they stopped again yeah we're just clear so what what is that without actually the chain are though in your life in room you know I think I just yeah I mean I'd you know it's a good point you bring up because I feel like I do have more feelings now you know and I feel like you're clear to be honest with you definitely yeah well go to your face yeah it's just like a far more like just the complexion is a little healthier yeah and you seem help just to help you are in general yeah yeah appreciate that man oh and I know that you're taking it seriously because you know I'm silvertone a I get this observing you yeah farm and I know that you're active and you're doing it you know and that's that's great yeah man I appreciate that dude it's good and I mean the interesting thing is how many how many other people you meet we're doing it and it's just that's the kind of thing it keeps you going a lot of times you'll just feel like ah and then somebody else will tell you a story or you meet somebody else who's in the program it's just like okay yeah you know there is something going on here something magical kind of yeah a lot more people in the boat than you thought initially because I mean even since I've met him I realized it's like so many people are actually sober yeah and who are fully creative people and who are just as wild and Bobby like when people see him the perception is always oh he's either high or you know yeah he's like an another do something good that we got released from another country deal well you would you look at me though wouldn't it be a great movie it's like we get back one of hours from Bobby's country they also to survive either APO W but we also like we gotta get rid of bad yeah yeah quickly you think I'm a disaster I'm a disaster oh I know what do I think when I see you like I will you think mom I think I see like a kind of like a cocaine cartoon that kind of jumped off the page and it's been running from his drawer you know yeah oh I got a lot I feel like you just on the run from your artist right and you're just doing whatever you can and just stay on the lam you know here hanging out here with this guy in the closet and big lady here ginger ginger root right here and which I know yet means Michael Landon over here Michael well except but ya mean I don't know you're the only committees that makes me laugh just by seeing you see have a special gift I think it's a nice look you have but it's not a lot because people I hate when people do that like Eric Griffin said that Diddy you just you just walk around and you're just like this I'm mad but he's probably jealous of it though look at his bio oh yeah we talked about of every pot guy but I think you're a special guy man I think you're always surprising that there's other layers to you which is it oh man I would like order to get a note I'm surprising is that I've been looking underneath the table and you guys have been playing footsie for about an hour I love the oh man well it makes me feel nice I'll say they're always very accepting of other people and so that's a nice because especially as comedians it's tough sometimes to you know you want you don't to impose and kamini that have been doing it longer so when other comedians are nice to you that have been doing it longer it's really makes you feel help you know more confident yeah we know it's another yeah I would always think so I saw David Spade there might he came but he always mixed one like he says jokes like he goes where'd you park a rickshaw that's right and I laugh whatever right I'm Supergirl but here is I you know you always Texas me as table uh-huh just a really nice guy why and I just thought because he's been he's ahead of me well and it makes me feel like oh this guy's really cool he has a really nice cool guy right you know and I just feel like when I started I didn't run into those guys yeah when I started I ran into a bunch of [ __ ] [ __ ] I thought wow and um I just like support you know I like supporting calendar guy really believe when I want to perform even the [ __ ] that you were saying here in this podcast it's the same vein of like you know you is this guy real yeah right because it seems real he with his descriptions he paints a world where he comes from I don't know if it's if I go to that world for real that it would be like exactly the way he describes it but still it's very vivid in my mind I really I've told him a million times you gotta create a show about your life about your where you come from yeah in Louisiana all those guys with the deficiencies in Chad yeah and yeah like an episode of you looking for 17 you know 70 miles away there's a Chinese guy we gotta save our money yeah here's one episode it's very funny yeah right thanks man and it's not rooted in racism it's just ignorant white people is what are they ignorant why well me met well meetings our hearts are pure to try to this is dumb you know man and you're the other thing that I've said to you before and I know that you're gonna hate me bringing it up and I don't know why you're ashamed of it is that thing we talked about in the elevator what reality television yeah yeah I'm not ashamed of it I would so I started out in reality TV I was a road rules cast right in 1999 and they don't have to show anymore oh I'm sorry oh you remember I agree I grew up watching you yeah pop from America man haha go bro but I grew up in bro put a flag patch on your level aid bro I know dude I grew up in Georgia and I used to write all the time uh awesome man yeah good um yeah I mean it was just a wild time I guess it's just because it's hard to like it's not hard to separate from it it's just like it was just I was so young you know I'm 37 now like I was 19 oh my god yeah it doesn't count it just doesn't it does it all so I'm going to say this yeah this is that if because I don't I don't never seen the show I part of it I don't know that you're from there yeah and a lot I think a lot of comics are like that a lot of comes that are older or like you know what the [ __ ] is that we don't really part of it but you know you your merit it's what you are now that I judge you by yeah okay and what I see is a comic a real comedian with real chops who's in a ghost places yeah and for you to get spots at the store The Improv Laugh Factory on nightly basis which is what you do yeah to do headline I know what rooms you play yeah they're all all a list rooms yeah that's not you know a reality show guy that's a real comics right you know life yeah so it's like it's something that you did in the past but I think it's interesting to do a show like that show what's called a rule road rules and to reinvent yourself that's that right jamie chung i know you went to israel yeah yeah maybe chengdu she was on the real world yeah you know christina prevents key what is she drew her desk it was a roguish cast right she is hilarious yeah yeah hilarious okay you know in certain instances you can come from a show like that yeah what I swear to [ __ ] god when I left MADtv I couldn't get auditions because kasseri directors would be like yeah he's from that TV yeah it was a negative thing mmm right so I just went oh it's gonna go back stand out they don't want me hmm and then you see key and Peele Jordan you know Keegan I come on two people do well I'm doing okay yeah and now those things are not said anymore it's more of a thing well they're from that right right but for many years I was ashamed of it I really was it was like a shameful thing really oh yeah because nobody wanted like it there was a sense of like that it wasn't cool right right and and it wasn't I don't think at the time but if you look at who's come from there the lineage the comedy lineage I mean the people even writing like oh yeah yeah I mean Colton Dunn who's on superstore superstore but he was one of our writers yeah years Michael Hitchcock from all the Christopher Guest movies was one of our producers I mean there's a lot of but we would go to MADtv would hang out with Eugene Levy and all these guys that he's hanging out there John Candy's daughter I mean all the SA TV the history of it would be there but we in terms of the media or in general the country we don't give a [ __ ] right but I can't change my past and when they offer me the show I took it yeah because what am I also gonna do yeah the opportunity yeah and I did it and I'm fine my career is fine well my point though is is that you came from there but it's nothing to be ashamed of yeah and I remember like you know I used to bring you up like that you didn't like it I won't I understand why then yeah because you want the audience you know I mean but I just think that you should never run from it dude because people land began respecting I get what you're saying because there's stigma attached to reality TV in general and the types of characters that are in reality TV today which you know you know it you do it's a stigma yeah so I do that brother it is when you don't have talent yeah you're right yeah you know we do you know one piece you know a lot of these guys it's a lottery they won a lottery ticket but then some people actually have talent yeah a real talent and at 19 if they were to ask me to do Road rules it would have changed my life yeah I got no [ __ ] I no friends nothing at 19 I was invisible were you really ready oh absolutely I walk into anywhere and no one saw me yeah Wow alright and so of course I would have taken that at 19 yeah I mean I had no plans of going to comedy or being a comedian I didn't have any I was just walking across campus at college and I was just like really really depressed and they had like auditions and then next thing you know I was uh they called me one day and they asked me to to go on this trip you know and I was like oh this is going to be really really interesting and then yeah and then that's how I got into it I think the part that kind of burned me was like or the part that got to me was like whenever I got out to LA years later and I decided I'm gonna get in I want to do stand-up some of it was there was times where you know I liked making people laugh because I always you know like and this is part of alcoholism you just I just never felt I always thought people just didn't like me ever since I was young just some of those wrong with me and this is them where I thought people just didn't like me and it just there was nothing I could ever do in a moment to feel any different and so I knew if I was making people laugh that they had to be liking me for that few seconds because they couldn't hate you can't not like somebody in laugh right so it was like a real proof that I had you know visually and so you know then I got to making people laugh and and then you would get out to like places and then there was always just like these dudes who would like come from other cities or whatever who'd probably auditioned to be on these reality shows because like it was always those types of people I would see when I go into auditions and stuff who would always kind of I guess made me feel negative about it right right you know so I don't know if sometimes the the feelings came from me as much as they did probably just from some weird lack of acceptance so yea and back in Louisiana people would like try to fight me at bars and guys would like come and learn people throw them bottles at me and like it just got crazy and that's one of the reasons why I left Louisiana was because it got so crazy you know it just got out of jealousy right probably I get I get drunk [ __ ] this guy you know he's on TV and MTV and again where they call me the n-word Tim what I'm like wow like I mean I'm polish Nicaragua yeah yeah yeah uh so yeah just idiots you know I mean there's a lot of idiocy in a lot of places so but that made me feeling that the suffering yeah you coming to LA and you know what to be honest it probably wasn't good for you in the beginning when you came to LA yeah right those things could have been real that me they were like saying [ __ ] whatever right but the thing is is that the suffering is key it motivates you right to go I'm gonna get through this yeah without suffering there is no reward Oh true reward that's I believe that yeah all those moments of me going oh my god I'm out I was so young I will show you yeah one day I will show you and that idea that feeling I still have it'll never go away yeah so I am going to show you what I'm capable of yeah I think some of that hit me man right I got into me I was like okay like you know I didn't even have a chance I was making really any choices in my life I was 19 and then now you guys are gonna say oh this guy isn't you know talented or this guy couldn't be an entertainer you know or and I was like okay I'm gonna take the hardest job to do I'm going to take stand-up and I'm going to do that then yeah because then there's no way that anybody could say they can say whatever they want but with stand-up there's no nobody can help you they can get you up on the stage but you got to have to be up there Oh Mike you know we have to do that right you are now following because the summer spots that you get are later right I mean you I've seen the lineups where it's like happy [ __ ] hitters dude oh yeah and you go up there and crush - oh yeah that's a road all right one thing is that that right there should show people a lot yeah which is like that's a legitimate soldier [ __ ] I think you're also at a point in your career where I don't think anyone doubts that anymore like I go yeah you have a seat you know you've been around long enough as a stand-up that I don't think anyone would ever question that about you at least for me like I didn't know you from really rules and yeah I saw you there was no doubt in my mind that your legitimacy is 150% like I never thought I wonder where this guy came from where he started it was like no this guy's been doing stand-up all his life that's what I thought right yo do you do I'm gonna be real with you right now do I promise you this man I promise you this right now man okay I never bring it up again but I just need the video this one baby shouldn't have got it that I know I brought out this one time just to address it yeah but you and I were past it Oh speak to me all right will you speak up you and I are past it okay and we're going to move beyond it all okay all right I have no I know what does it I think you got to do this no no no baby that's no yes Ambrose no no no she thinks of this when I do this right with a negative it is negative it is it is it's negative it's positive he might go right ariana called art it's not a gun you know it because you know what you don't see oh I get it right now hide one God's touching me right now there he is where you don't see it but right okay yeah okay well we are but now I feel you bro I mean look I feel you man you know a perm you know I mean I appreciate your thoughts on it there mostly I don't have that you know I don't have that I need you on it my bad I don't I mean I don't ever think about it that much anymore except for yeah no I mean I mean I'm it's interesting to talk about the crazy thing is yeah I wish I had a ton of like memories and stuff I was just so young and I was just so you're partying too bubbly I was partying I was just like college at 19 honestly how much can Lucy did you get I mean I feel like I probably you know didn't please a lot of women yeah yeah but was really hot that thing I mean they had they had they had [ __ ] back then imagine man imagine being 19 you're good-looking dude right I'm like 1/8 as long as I brush my teeth I'm 1/8 yeah good look at you 19 I look I'd like to do that I realize that I look like to do that always you always accuse a farting I feel back to prom party anyone funny probably you know then Ryan actually funny right and that's how we got the [ __ ] Road rules at college would you how many people audition for that ten thousand people no like 50,000 every year yeah it's crazy right yeah so yeah so that he beat all those people out and whatnot you know man and then they all move to Los Angeles and became casting directors executives and then got angry at me whenever I walked into that we do now they'll see it was now we go over to UM Gilbert and we do a question from the internet and we Gilbert honestly is uh is um it was a popular name on the Little House on the Prairie do you remember that you watch that as well it is I didn't know there was a name do they get that where where is he from again yeah yeah from Atlanta you got to get it yeah Tony good show it's not at a shot Barry yeah it is and that would be my fifth actually Michael Landon luck yeah it's not why is that a good show when he said Michael and so yeah I've seen it robbed about then so I want to talk about Little House on the Prairie real quick okay I think that he's crossed the line with me really got like you know my table I don't realize well I'll do I am drawing the line at [ __ ] Little House on the Prairie genophage [ __ ] what worked all summer to go see you when I was a kid and you weren't there dude we're leaners checked the river are VA revealed that I think yeah you bro yeah I opened up store for two months and I knew see all those colors I closed it down see a week ago on tour right now and you could be the first Asian that a ton of people have ever met how great with that I got no no be real wage income your show be real right now but I'm just saying uptown are you from move from one coming in Louisiana having ttan yeah let me tell you something right now Lee Harvey Oswald went our middle school Wow thank you incoming incoming ttan right call being done come on right over oh damn do something selling swords bro Bobby look like even telling sores it up in covington yeah it's better than in Kennington yes yes there are no asians in Cummington i don't think there are any more I mean they might have had one you know at a certain point or a couple of it came through in some sort of program but I don't think that you're not if you ask somebody like where can I meet amazing people here nobody's gonna know a lot of Vietnamese there huh vietnamese vietnamese them you know let me ask you then I ate I love the vs man up so I run the Vietnamese I love the Vietnamese I've been to Vietnam I've been in LA Saigon Shang pen yeah I mean I actually I mean I'm gonna be a shaman pin shank [Laughter] right right yeah dude but I get you murdered so he asked a questions from the internet what the call it's called unhelpful advice he is gonna do it in the new eat we answer okay great but I will tell you that I could take you to places towns right now we would show up and it would be like come meet the first Asian you've ever met and you would be that person a [ __ ] weirdo we got any after you there we go we have to do want to do that I have to film it oh dude I could take you to at least what am I gonna die no they're gonna love it how it's going to come in and see the Asian gallery rattling a freak show like a like I'm the hairy face boy yeah what no we had a hairy face boy in our town just kidding son decay yeah and he go yo ah yeah the disease the hairy faces no he had long hairy face disease Jerry Lee says cornrow his cheek love the black girl with cornrows cheeks in the summer give him a little bit of relief from the heat but um but yeah I could take you to towns right now and I could meet seven and eight nine year olds that have never met an Asian oh I see okay well let's do that one hair I think we should do those of long I mean it would be really fascinating Donny I think it'd be fine I think I'm very funny so you'll put a tent up and go Asian guy and then a silikal area but you can wear it with bobby attorney that guy Bobby or what whatever use enclosed area where they couldn't touch me or now it should be a staircase up to like a like a tent or something yeah yeah let's mm is my first Asian you know yeah with Bobby on hopeful vice with Bobby kalila stov presents my first Asian coming to Louisiana Wow bro that's your talent that is a hello my name is Katherine I'm a seventeen year old and I'm currently worried about my social life after middle school my personality flipped on me and now I'm a shy introvert that can't seem to connect with people every time I push myself to talk to someone I find them boring and I give up on them people seem to be a hit or miss with me and currently everyone at school has seemed to be a hit or miss for me as well how should I go about to fix my social life Katherine 17 years old I'd say go do some help somebody else it's not like you're just a little bit caught up in your own ego I think Katherine and then there's some tough to tell a 17 year old but you know you just I don't know you're thinking about a lot from you like you this way and you that way and you know I'd put the phone down and just go meet go go help some people go help somebody that's crippled or somebody that you know that might have a gay lover on a small baby seat yeah yeah someone with Chisholm also is being 17 right yeah yeah but 17 bro what do you mean 17 I was Moody bro you are introverted booty I play chess I do all kinds of [ __ ] bro did you really yeah do you don't seem like that can I go well I lost my stepdad bro I was Coco actually let's go Co Joey Gino yeah answer enter it oh yeah yeah yeah close to the Coco yo Joey it's Bobby Lee do - we were he's on my podcast right now bro what's going on he just he goes doing my podcast right now what's going on and now you're we're looking beautiful you're a guest star right now so we have to pleasure to be on deal Vaughn's not Castle nor the old-school cat my little Asian brother Bobby Lee yeah but Joey will you do my podcast what are you gonna do my podcast everyone oh yeah you're doing it tonight you're gonna be in soon okay bro I'm gonna call you all right love you buddy all right all right all right you too Joe thanks for checking it oh he's the best man it'll call me like once every couple weeks in this check can see how I'm doing with you yeah you're gonna make me cry yeah why I don't know yes nice guy like you said man it's like you know people doing those nice things man it reminds me sometimes if I was showing this young dude on and I'll hit him up and be like you were hilarious or something you know yeah or just something that's gonna boost his spirits yeah but yeah I don't know maybe I'm being able to a little bit rude to the 17 year old you know I just that's actually good advice to every single teenager and I wish someone had said that to me when I was 17 because I really was a little bit too full of myself not even in the sense that I was actually full of myself I was just thinking of myself and everything everything that pertained only to me how the world exists and how it pertains to me only not the other way around and that's yeah I didn't harvest me later and I got stuck in that so yeah it's a tough thing to get stuck in I was lost man where are you yeah we uh I got sober when I was 17 Oh God bro my first time so sober was 17 - I stayed sober until I was 30 but dude I was lost from and when you went out at 30 how long do you go out there for couple years none ankles him real painful Joey Diaz almost killed a couple times I used to like I used to bring [ __ ] a [ __ ] suitcase full of pills Oh Joey Diaz was the first one I was handed - yeah yeah and then he would like take like my pills and then like he would take a pillow and then go to the bathtub and then later you know pillow in the bathtub put the shower on take my pills and just fall asleep cause I thought he was gonna die yeah you know that's Vietnam right there is gonna be it making you via bro with all that moisture so what's her name man Oh Catherine Catherine is good love love love Catherine 17 supposed to be really confusing so you're right on bond you're right on time I also want to say that I had to cancel on your show in North Carolina North Carolina this weekend I'm so looking sorry I'll tell you what happened I have to shoot love mm-hmm and it conflicted and I feel really bad about it because I really wanted to go I love North Carolina is it Charlotte love Charlotte and I really do I comedies are like I don't remember a lot yeah I apologize and I hope that you guys will forgive me and that I can come back one day hmm you have anything to plug feel yeah man I'll plug um I got my album it's called 30 pound bag of hamster bones that's a good one because I used to sell hamsters growing up I was amazing I was in the hamstring getting guinea pig game for a bit and what else I'll be in New York City this weekend we planned I'm playing at Gotham June 23rd and 24th great room and then I will be in Nashville and that is uh July 7th room at lap eight as Amy's I love that room and I haven't been so I'd love the support people come out it's good room dude I'm excited Andrew and those guys that is a great dude that's a great room I'm excited radio rvq you can have a good time oh really yeah yeah you like barbecue bro mmm yeah I do like it yeah every right Korean barbecue oh we have you never had a real barbecue no but I'll tell you this at one time I had a pet I proposed a pet shop or what it was in Vietnam right and they they were killing animals they were killing animals it could have been like a butchery yeah yeah and not what Korean Barbie head of it well they had a dove dude that I'm like this is a peace bird you know and I think yeah yeah yeah yeah I've actually eaten dove before a couple of brothers used to cook duh but by me when I was growing up they did and I see a meetin dove and for years I'm like I don't need peace meat restaurant and then finally I had some yeah but uh gaming you can't get the fact that you're eating peace out of your head I felt like for me but anyhow commenting a hippie yeah it's like yeah it's like eating something you know it's like eating a dick that's just giving up for [ __ ] and it's just try to help people enough I don't get it something like that yeah it's not exactly it's not exactly as bad I do yeah that was a really bad idea but anyway uh they were I bought it I bought this bird right I bought a bird I'm like I'm gonna give it a bird is freedom you know right I'm gonna get out here and just Andy Dufresne this little girl right so I bought this dove off this butchery at this butcher here and I got it I throw it up in the air like that to let it go immediately like seven Vietnamese people came by with nets and I caught it no I'm not even joking right snapped its neck immediately oh [ __ ] and left on to wherever they've been yeah you know who Keyser söze is from Kill Bill quit not often yes or no was it no you Keyser söze is no um let's move on do you know Elan musk is yeah oh yeah she was a buddy of mine some spaghetti with him whatever goes to over this house all the time and he said that Elon gave him a spaghetti like this he goes you want some spaghetti he's like sure and instead of fixing him as own dish yeah he just puts him out of his dish but afford and put it about himself ah who's your buddy this young guy homosexual gentleman it's named Matthew Cole Weiss beautiful guy beautiful fancy guy's gotta give TL Vaughn a round of applause oh but I was wonderful so that was wonderful thank you and your handles for social media just at Theo von th EO vo n and yeah just check out my tour dates I'm coming up in some neat spots and I really appreciate you having me Bobbie I'm a big fan I love you man love you too that was great it was so [ __ ] funny gift guys make sure you follow us on instagram at tiger belly and on twitter at the tiger bility you can email us any questions or unhelpful advice at the Tiger belly at gmail.com and make sure you guys that you check out our survey and helpless figure out what our demographics are by going to survey Lipson comm slash tiger belly oh yeah what is this and if you're hiring I don't forget to go to zip cruiser calm slash belly guys have a good day oh [ __ ] [Music]

Channel: TigerBelly

Views: 1,600,242

Keywords: tiger belly, tigerbelly, bobby lee, khalyla, gilbert galon, podcast, khalyla kuhn, tgrbly, theo von, this past weekend, 30lb bag of hamster bones, stand up, stand up comedy

Id: Z7eer0ed1TM

Length: 66min 32sec (3992 seconds)

Published: Thu Jun 22 2017

Reddit Comments

[u/DrDougExeter]

he's always killing it. he's one of the funniest people

[u/el_tamal]

I used to think YMH was the funniest podcast around until I discovered Tigerbelly. Bobby Lee is the most hilarious fucked up human I've ever listened too

[u/[deleted]]

Where the hell did Theo Von even come from? I never even heard his name until he did the Church of What's Happening podcast a couple times. Now he is every where, and I love it. Dude is fucking hilarious.

Like I know he did Road Rules, and Reality Bites Back, but how was he just unknown as a comic basically until the past few months. He is just so casually funny it is ridiculous.

[u/jwitham2002]

/r/TheoVon

[u/Hap_Hazard]

Theo is one the most subtly funny people around. He destroys on any podcast he is on. His Netflix special is pretty good, too.