The Weird Side Of Amazon

[Music] what's up Greg I hope you're all having a great day welcome back to my channel this of course is another episode of sitting alone in an unfurnished room like a weirdo so most of you have seen the video I made with Drew a couple months ago where we talked about the jeremy renner app and since we made that video a lot has happened in the world of jeremy renner firstly just a few days after we made that video about his app the app got shut down jeremy renner himself posted this lengthy note on the app saying that he was taking down the app because there were too many trolls on the app and he was gonna be giving anyone who spent money on Starz refunds and for a second drew and I were like huh did we do that did we roast this international celebrities app so hard that he had no choice but to take it down but then we looked into it a little bit more and it seems like there were like a whole host of other problems on the app that we didn't even touch on and it's been a long time coming unbeknownst to us the app was full of trolls that were impersonating other celebrities people were making accounts for like OJ Simpson and Casey Anthony and posting really weird stuff on the app but worse than all that worse than people making fake accounts for politicians and murderers and just all around spreading lies on the app people were making fake accounts of Jeremy himself they would make accounts where the name would be Jeremy Renner and the picture would be the exact same picture that the official Jeremy Renner was using and since for some reason there was no like verification thing next to Jeremy Renner's name anyone could make it look like they were the actual Jeremy Renner and people would use these fake Jeremy Renner accounts to try to get stars from people try to convince people to give them their stars because they would think that they were the actual Jeremy Renner which is fucked up because as we all know the only person who deserves stars is the real Jeremy Renner no one else should be getting stars so anyway instead of implementing a policy where you can't make your name Jeremy Renner and you can't make your picture the same as the actual Jeremy Renner he just deleted the whole app he just got rid of the whole lass app toss the whole thing in the garbage it's no good anymore ooh stinky stinky app no good apparently it doesn't take much trouble for someone who's worth 50 million dollars to be like you know what this is more trouble than it's worth I'm not even making that much money I'm just gonna delete the whole thing sure it could have been a fun place for my fans to interact but instead I had to make it one all about money and then to the second that any trouble arose I just am gonna delete the whole thing but since that video Jeremy also has another adventure he's been working on the jeremy renner amazon celebrity store so I don't realize this but apparently Amazon has this thing called celebrity stores where they partner with certain celebrities to make curated stores full of items that are endorsed by a specific celebrity so celebrities will pick out items that fit their brand like post Malone has one where you can buy headphones and then I assume what happens is that the celebrity involved in the store gets a cut of the revenue for all of the items that are sold on the store so it's like a mutually beneficial thing for them and Amazon and it turns out that jeremy renner has just started one they've got all the Jeremy's favorite stuff in here Jeremy's favorite fishing pole Jeremy's favorite night Jeremy's favorite trunk his favorite food which apparently is beef jerky and trail mix so if you had any doubt in your mind that Jeremy Renner was a real man's man the only products he endorses our camping equipment and the only food he eats are beef jerky and trail mix you can use this store to be just like Jeremy eat the nuts that Jeremy eats sleep in the tent that Jeremy sleeps in wear the clothes that jeremy renner wears the clothes on amazon that jeremy renner definitely has worn and endorses he may be worth 50 million dollars but he totally buys all of his clothes from Amazon and recommends Amazon clothing everything on this store just gives off like a weird off-putting vibe like all of the pictures of Jeremy Renner they use tending to a fire and looking into the camera with that sultry gaze that Jeremy Renner is known for I don't know what's got more smolder to it that fire or the look in Jeremy's eyes series got some binoculars and looking kind of creepily into the camera in general the whole store gives off this vibe of like Jeremy Renner trying to act really cool but it's just reeking of like corporate sponsorship I went and looked at some of the reviews for the products in the store and a lot of them are pretty funny this person rated the fishing-rod 5 stars but their review says Jeremy are you disappointed in me why does Jeremy look like he's disappointed in the home she's disappointed I didn't catch the fish on the first try angry that I'm taking forever lighting the fire and just overly disappointed in the fact for a moment I thought I could have been as cool as him by buying these products okay here's another similar review for the fishing rod this person gave it four stars I have not purchased this product which is always a good way to start a review of a product by admitting that you've never used it or even seen it in person but I just want to say how sad the Jeremy Renner store is really look at him so bad and so sad I bet he never uses any of the stuff they're selling but I do think he does high-end real estate which is pretty smart and cool minimal loss of the economy turned south and a better investment than middled a low class real estate but he has a ton of money so I bet I could never go into that anyways forgot my point for the stores a shame and mr. Renner should be embarrassed I'd say that those reviews are a pretty accurate assessment of the Jeremy Renner store it's weird to see someone so famous trying so hard to make money in the most corporate ways possible like making an app or the only thing you can do is pay him money like doing this weird a celebrity Amazon store endorsing products that he's definitely never used so anyway that's that's what Jeremy Renner's been up to lately that's the only weird thing he's been doing he hasn't been doing anything else weird other than that he's been living a pretty normal life with his family and he hasn't been doing anything weird or creepy and he definitely seems like a great well-adjusted man Jeremy Renner's ex-wife claims he threatened to kill her Jeremy Renner bit his daughter yep nothing weird he's not doing anything weird he's just living his normal life and camping a lot those articles do kind of make the camping supplies seem a little bit less fun yeah this whole list of stuff really seems a lot more suspicious after reading those articles like what is he planning on doing with these bow and arrows and who is he planning on watching with these binoculars Jeremy Renner's life has really been in kind of a downward spiral ever since his app got shut down geez I didn't think it'd take that much of a toll on the guy anyway after I was done researching the Jeremy Renner story I started falling down all these rabbit holes of weird products that are on Amazon and holy shit there's a lot of weird products on Amazon okay now here's a really fun product the cash saddle saddle yeehaw more like me ha more like ye nah cuz what the fuck is this I don't think that this is what the song save a horse ride a cowboy was about look at this poor dad dude he looks so embarrassed he's been conquered by a three year old girl who really seems to be enjoying herself I'll give him that the girl seems to be having a jolly good time but the dad he's so ashamed he doesn't even want to show his face his cowboy face his cow face so in case you couldn't tell this product is just a saddle to put on your dad so you can ride him around I don't know who this would be a gift for like is it a gift for the kid or a gift for the dad seems like a pretty mean gift to get your dad but a lot of the reviews say like this is a great gift for Father's Day no it's not hey Dad for Father's Day I'm gonna break your fucking back how's that I'm gonna ride you around for hours happy Father's Day the customer question-and-answer section of this product are out of control would this be suitable for a toy rocking horse this product is best used what it is meant for a dad though I'd imagine a rocking horse or whatever would be fine but like it's meant for dads what the fuck why so unnecessarily mean also like a rocking horse like you've never heard of one before oh I'm sure your little what was it again a rocking horse yeah I'm sure it'd be fine for that don't rocking horses already have seats on them like a place for the kid to sit I mean I guess a dad does too the saddle seems pretty unnecessary for any circumstance it's not that hard to just grab on to your dad it just mostly seems demeaning to strap this thing on to your dad someone else answered the same question no only for uncle I mean that's just not true this is a daddle saddle I'm sure you could put it on an uncle but he has to be a dad and you can't put it on an uncle with no kids it wouldn't work it's only compatible with dads oh good there's the police version yeah that the police costume doesn't actually come with this it seems like the only reason that this is a police officer saddle is because it comes in sheriff blue [Music] why do the dads and these pictures never look happy or even kind of enthusiastic about what's going on he looks like he's having an existential crisis it looks like his midlife crisis started right when this picture was taken oh cool you can dress like a knight too and your dad will still want to die that's awesome I have to give him some credit though this is some really realistic advertising they're really managing your expectations with this product and letting you know who's going to be the one enjoying it have you ever wanted to give your kids the ultimate horseback ride of course you have well now you can thanks to the casual Dallas saddle just strap it on and take your kids your kids will love feeling like they're strapped to a real horse because you smell like shit you smell like a horse your kids can dress up like a cowboy a mounted police officer a princess or a knight in shining armor and you can dress up like a fucking whore your kids will love feeling like they're riding a real horse whether it be through the jungle around an old dirt road and you will not have a good time you will not like this product you will not have fun you're gonna hate your wife forever for getting you this as a gag gift and resent your kids for making you use it so call today and become a fuckin horse okay finally here's one where the dad is actually enthusiastic about what's going on he's actually happy to be playing with his daughter but now I feel like he's having way too much fun yeah you know what I take back what I said before you did you should not be having this much fun using the daddle this dude is getting a creepy amount of joy from crawling around on the floor all the fun stuff is happening up here there shouldn't really be anything cool or interesting going on down here it should mostly just be tiring and painful what's going on down here you definitely shouldn't be open mouth laughing about just crawling around on the floor so this one is called the pony up daddy saddle which feels like a really condescending thing to say to your dad pony up daddy is like doesn't pony up mean to like settle your debts or you know pay what you owe someone pony up daddy you owe me the ride of my life you owe me the health of your lower back pony up bitch it's time for me to strap a saddle to you and ride you like a fucking horse how many oh good that's a commercial for the pony up daddy let's check it out pony up daddy oh great I'm glad that they're giving kids that command when they want the dad to put on the saddle it's not just daddy can we play the game where you the whore the kids are gonna walk into the room and be like pony up daddy pony up daddy is a fun saddle that fits your dad just right he looked so defeated when he got thrown on all fours like really what my life has come to got his head down and everything just this again you can have a pony ride any time day or night don't worry mom you can pony up too oh shit the pony up daddy works on mommies - you don't even have to get a pony up mommy this is awesome what it looks next it's gonna work out uncle you can pony up - with pony up daddy oh shit daddy bro is back this daddy's throwing it back pony up daddy ride an elephant on an African safari or a tiger through the thick jungle hop on a dinosaur to take a trip through time then ride your Pony into the sunset Jesus man how long are these kids riding their dad for how many animals does this dad have to be before his poor old bag can rest this kid is taking him on a fucking Trek they're going on a journey together Wow why does that dad look like he was looking at something sus on his phone he's looking at his phone and his kid comes up and he's like oh oh yeah sure yep I'll do that I'll pony up don't ask what I was looking at its climb on the saddle and grab the handle and hang on no more ripped collars no more stretch shirts and no more broken jewelry goddamn these kids are brutal just fucking choking their dad's you don't need to worry about jewelry getting pulled out of your collar getting stretch because the pony up daddy comes with a bit to put in your dad's fucking mouth so you can pull that shit when he's getting out of line it's time to play with your kids again oh shit it's time to play with my kids again I gotta go I gotta go play with my kids again okay I'm starting to like it I like the idea of getting off the couch and getting off your electronics and playing with your parents but I feel like we could go even bigger just riding one dad that's lame and kids these days they're resourceful I think it'd be really cool if they started making like daddy carriages you can have like a carriage that you and all your friends sit in it's got big wheels and then there's like a group of six harnesses in the front that you strap a bunch of daddies into so now you've got like six daddies pulling this little Daddy carriage around now that would be cool taking your daddies out on a dirt road and just like gah gah daddy pony up so if the makers of pony up daddy or the dadle dadle are watching this feel free to use my idea just cut me like a thirty percent royalty check and we've got a deal you could call it the giddyup daddy or the daddy drawn carriage well I feel like it's gotten significantly darker in this room since I started filming and you know what that means I've been filming for too long so it's time to stop thank you guys for watching this video if you want to support my channel head on over to my merch store and check out some of my cool new merch I've got hoodies that say Greg I've got t-shirts they have a little picture of me and that guy on him we've got nut cracker hats we even have little Greg necklaces now so if you want any of those cool cool things head on over to Danny Gonzales dot store if you're new here and you're not subscribed yet make sure you subscribe and turn on my notifications to join Greg we're the fastest growing army on all of you to know cap sign there's not a cap involved in this entire equation nary a cap to be found Thank You Mellie for turning out my notifications you are truly Greg I'll see you guys next time with a really interesting video where hopefully I'm not in a totally undecorated room she call me daddy yeah I ain't got no kids but the way she talkin to me you would probably think I didn't call me daddy ya ain't got no kids but the way she talked to me you think I'm her guardian she call me daddy bitch I got those long socks underneath my Brown crotch drinking

Channel: Danny Gonzalez

Views: 3,930,833

Rating: 4.9044657 out of 5

Keywords: danny gonzalez, funny, commentary, comedy, react, reaction, reacting, awful, humor

Id: UZd2REpVK3Y

Length: 14min 58sec (898 seconds)

Published: Sun Nov 17 2019

Reddit Comments

[u/Meljusenr]

PONY UP, DADDY! PONY UP!

ETA:

real talk: this vid was super hilarious! I've ranted before about how much I love his style so I won't rant here but...very good. Very funny!

[u/maieen10]

Why do I think Danny would use one of those saddles for the hypothetical “Daddy” music video?

... I don’t like that I have that thought.

[u/WoodenEstablishment3]

Those poor men...

[u/AnnaK22]

I could not stop laughing. Oh so sooo many "That's what she said" moments.

[u/chillycheesedawg]

Maybe I laugh wayyy too easily, but I legit snorted out my coffee in the first 5 seconds because of that stare at the camera

[u/Nick-is-cool-I-guess]

Pony up mommy

[u/PublicTrash]

1 trending

[u/Meljusenr]

Danny: makes a bunch of overtly dark humor jokes and even sets the dark humor vibe with an unsettling intro.

Danny: makes a couple overtly sexual jokes.

People in the comments: WWWOOOW THIS IS SO SEXUAL OMG I'M UNCOMFORTABLE!! Is it possible that I, an innocent bean, am putting all the sexual meaning into words like "daddy" and "riding" and Danny didn't have to emphasize it too much because he knows what I'm thinking???

Danny, you're an absolute comedic genius.

[u/maieen10]

In case you’re wondering:

”Jeremy Renner” Count: 27

”Jeremy” Count: 12

”Renner” Count: 1

”Daddy/Daddies” Count: 24

”Dad(s)” Count: 24