We are branching off from our Nintendo Bread
and Butter today to talk about one of the internet’s favorite indie games; Stardew
Valley. Whether you’re looking to relax with a farm
Sim or delve deep into achievement hunting, this game has a little something for everyone. And whether we like to admit it or not, we
keep coming back for the romance options as well. There are plenty of eligible bachelors and
bachelorettes in Pelican Town, all of whom can be romanced by a male or female character. We know because we’ve pursued all of them
in the name of research. They all offer different benefits in terms
of game mechanics. But who is the best spouse from a moral standpoint? Hi, I’m _______ from 1Up Binge and today
we’ll be ranking Potential Stardew Valley Spouses from Good to Evil. RULES For this list we’re breaking the Single
Stardew Valley NPCs into three categories; The Good, The Grey and The Bad. (No Evil this time around. And honestly, even our bad is pretty tame.) Since this list is all about marriage options
we will only be looking at the NPCs who are considered Single at the start of the game. We’re sorry if you’re in love with Linus
or Marnie but we’re saving them for a different list. We know that everyone has tastes and preferences. There is no shade or judgment toward players
who regularly romance characters from our bad tier. They have many admirable and attractive qualities
that make them eligible; we just have some doubts as to their moral fortitude. We’ll be looking at NPC dialogue options,
heart events, and personal character arcs throughout the game to try and get a feel
for their personalities and beliefs. Finally, on that note, you can consider a
spoiler warning in effect for this video. But with all that said, grab your mermaid
pendant and let’s get to the list. First up are the Good. These are Pelican Town residents whom you
should have no qualms about settling down with. Winning the Gold Medal of Good is Sam. While Sam may have his faults, he is as close
as you can get to the gold standard of a virtual spouse. He’s caring, considerate, AND has a complete
character arc throughout the game. This means that he’s capable of learning
and improving himself, despite not starting out so bad. One thing that made us fall for Sam is how
he looks after his little brother, Vincent – especially in Year 1. During the first year of Stardew Valley, Sam
and Vincent’s father Kent is away, fighting in the war. Sam doesn’t know if his father will ever
return to the valley, especially as rumors in the town seem grim. Sam makes sure to carve out plenty of time
for his little brother while they wait, and gives him assurance that things are going
to be okay. In Sam’s Three Heart Event he opens up to
the player character about whether or not it’s right to get Vincent’s hopes up when
he too has doubts. It shows that he’s not taking his brother’s
feelings lightly, and shows a sensitive side to the “experimental noise rock” guitarist. He’s very close to his family. This is a common theme with Stardew Valley
NPCs in general, but we can’t think of anyone who exemplifies it better. He also loves kids. Not only does his character arc include him
composing children’s music professionally, but he’s an attentive father. He never seems annoyed with being a parent
or asks you to do more than you already do in raising the babies. Unlike some of the upcoming spouses, he has
an unconditional appreciation for what you do and how you run the household. None of his marriage dialogue could be considered
nagging, and he trusts you to run the house, even during the winter months. It does touch on his biggest flaw; he’s
lazy. There’s a period before he gets the gig
composing music for “The Happy Junimo Show” where he openly admits to not doing much around
the house. He owns up to the fact he doesn’t know how
to cook. We admire that , despite the inclination to
lounge around, he decides to instead contribute to the household with his music. The final thing that we’ll say about Sam
is that he’s very approachable, even to new players. He’s friendly from the first time you meet
him. His open schedule and wide variety of loved
and liked gifts, make him easy to pursue, even in Spring of Year 1. The Silver Medal of Good goes to Penny. It’s possible if this is your first time
romancing someone that Penny can seem standoffish or rude. She’s shy and doesn’t hide her disappointment
in disliked gifts particularly well. For these reasons, and one or two other small
flaws, we almost considered leaving her lower in the tier. But we think the good more than outweighs
the bad. The main reason we find ourselves in love
with Penny is because she’s so good to the children of the town. She tutors Jas and Vincent, as well as taking
them on field trips and escorting them to the playground. Through her heart events you learn that the
job started as, well, a job, but you can tell from her dialogue and actions that she really
does care about the kids. This is all the more impressive considering
that she lives in a somewhat troubled home. Though Pam is far from abusive to her daughter,
the two don’t see eye to eye. Penny disapproves of her mother’s drinking
and lack of pride in their home. Her sensitive nature is both good and bad. It’s easy to lose friendship with Penny
by choosing the wrong dialogue options. Whereas some characters deeply value the truth,
Penny needs coddling. For example, she makes you a dish in her Six
Heart Event that doesn’t turn out. The only way to gain friendship with her during
that time is by saying that you loved it anyway. Anything else she will take as a complete
failure. While this trait makes her more difficult
to court successfully, it also makes her a great wife. She’s open and honest about her feelings. She may actually be the best spouse at communication. She takes pride in what she does on the farm. She also expresses that she feels like a team,
without ever trying to take credit for the work that you do. She’s one of a handful of spouses who you
really feel like you’re getting to build a better life with. Between her romantic nature and desire for
a big family, it’s very gratifying to settle down with Penny. You feel like you get to be a part of her
character arc. The Bronze Medal of Good goes to Elliott. We could have put him in “Grey” territory
were he not so delightfully wholesome and affectionate. One thing that makes Elliott an easy choice
for the good tier is that his faults are minimal and don’t really hurt anybody. Basically we’re calling him a drama queen. As a writer, he has an almost Shakespearan
way of talking in day-to -day conversation that makes him appear eccentric. It may draw a lot of attention to him, but
we don’t really mind. It’s also something that we admire after
the wedding. Though he can come off as showy and pretentious,
his manner of speaking gives him the most unique and quotable lines of marriage dialogue. “I feel burnt out in your absence. But when I hear that sound of muddy boots
on wood, my heart rises from the ash.” There are other sweet things that we learn
through Elliott’s dialogue about what it’s like being married to him. He keeps a secret book of love poems for you. He’ll rescue spiders from the house rather
than see them squashed. If you can stand his flair for the dramatic
and over-the-top expressions, you’ll find him to be incredibly sweet. Rounding out the Good tier is Emily Emily is a pure soul and she means well. Her enthusiasm for everything makes her one
of the easiest NPCs to romance – even accidentally. She seems like an open-hearted character and
beautiful person, albeit somewhat spacey at times. This doesn’t mean that she can’t be down
to earth. She’s actually much more practical than
her sister Haley. She holds down a part time job at The Stardrop
Saloon, and we learn later she’s the one taking care of the house. She loves everyone in Pelican Town. She will send you recipes in between heart
events. She does community programs that, despite
being eccentric, are inclusive. This includes a gem meditation class as well
as a clothing therapy session. She’s also the kind of person that would,
and does, nurse a wounded parrot back to health and adopt him when it becomes clear he can’t
fly anymore. She commits to whatever she’s doing 100%
and we absolutely admire her for that. What keeps her from being higher in this tier
is her ability to listen. Specifically to and about Clint, who is in
love with her. Aside from the awkward position this puts
you in with the local blacksmith should you marry Emily, it’s also a bit cruel of her. Early on we understand how she doesn’t realize
Clint has a crush on her, but by the end it’s less believable. There’s a quest where Clint pays you to
bring Emily an Amethyst on his behalf. When you try to tell her that the amethyst
was ordered by Clint, she brushes it off saying she doesn’t care where it came from, she’s
just glad you brought it. There are several other instances like this
that make us think maybe she’s being willfully ignorant of the crush. It’s a little disappointing for someone
who we consider to be so open in every other regard. We move now to ‘The Grey.’ These are the marriage candidates who, while
wonderful, have their drawbacks. Kicking off this tier is Maru. You may be wondering why Maru wasn’t at
the top of our list. A strong case could be made for her, after
all. She’s a genius, she’s sweet, and she is
shown throughout several events to have one of the strongest moral compasses in the game. As a friend, girlfriend, and wife, she does
her best to show you cool scientific concepts and let you into her world while acknowledging
that it’s different than yours. On paper, she’s the ideal spouse. In practice, we didn’t feel it was so simple. One thing about Maru is that she knows just
how smart she is, and can come across as condescending. During her heart events there are dialogue
options where you know she’s judging you for saying the wrong thing. It makes her morality a bit of a double edged
sword. In her Four Heart Event, for instance, she
drops a beaker in the clinic. She asks you for advice on what to tell Dr.
Harvey, but if you choose anything other than the truth, you lose friendship with her. It shows her dedication to honesty, but also
proves that she holds you to a high standard that even she struggles with in moments of
stress. She also creates a sentient robot during her
Ten Heart Event. She created the robot to help her parents
once she leaves home, but the robot doesn’t want to serve. After she lets it go she asks you what you
think. Needless to say, she expects you to agree
with her decision. Some of the dialogue options can get pretty
nasty in this one otherwise. Even some of her engagement dialogue comes
across the wrong way. “I need to get mentally prepared for being
a farmer’s wife.” Her condescending nature doesn’t get better
after marriage, either. There is nothing in terms of game mechanics
that she can do to actually help you run the farm better than another spouse could. But she does offer her unsolicited opinions
about how you do things. She says that she’s open to discussing how
to maximize your crop yield, assuming that she knows the business better than you. This will not stop her from almost demanding
to hear your plan to get through tougher times, while acknowledging that you are the one making
the money of the household. “What are your plans for maintaining our
income this winter?” She also does nag you about the children,
should you have them, more than the previous entries on the list. Whereas other spouses might appreciate your
time, acknowledge your work, and offer to help you, Maru mostly checks in to make sure
you’re spending enough time with them. You should spend time with your virtual children,
don’t get us wrong, but these dialogue options sound less supportive. (Especially if you get them on a busy farm
day.) But again, she does have good qualities. Maru is a genius with strong morals. She believes in freedom, equality and truth. She also is one of the few NPC’s who continues
working her regular hours after marriage. She puts in time at the clinic twice a week,
and expresses that even after the wedding, she likes to continue supporting the community
in such a vital way. All in all we think she’s a great character,
a great person, but with a tendency to make one feel bad about themselves. Following her is her half-brother Sebastian. If you go through Sebastian’s dialogue carefully,
it seems as though he has also been burned by Maru’s sense of superiority. We can’t imagine it was easy growing up
in a house with her – being overshadowed by a younger sibling. Sebastian is a bit of a loner. It can feel really good, as a romantic partner,
to break through that shell and help ease some of his anxiety. Of course that anxiety also makes him more
stand-offish in the early game and harder to get a hold of should you want to romance
him. Most of his Heart Events are focused on the
two of you more than his interactions with the people in his family. While that can feel intimate, it makes it
harder to judge him as a person. We don’t really know how he feels about
most of the people in Pelican Town. There are sweet moments, like when he suggests
hobbies for the two of you or when he quits smoking for the player character. He also rescues a frog and starts keeping
them as pets. (We’re listing that as sweet, though depending
on what dialogue options you choose this can also be a negative thing. If you disapprove of him keeping frogs, he
essentially tells you he doesn’t care and can do what he wants with his space. This version makes him seem more childish
and aggressive.) He has less desirable traits as well, however. He seems to take the money you make on the
farm for granted. He starts working on a game after the wedding
because he no longer feels like he has to work on anything profitable, even though his
work seemed important to him beforehand. Likewise, he’s prone to make jokes about
having married you for the money. This is something he has in common with Sam,
but the phrasing is different enough to change the tone. Sam will sometimes joke about marrying for
money, and then explain that he’s kidding and he cares about you.Sebastian will sometimes
tell you he loves you, and end the confession with telling you to go make more money. It still plays like a joke, but one that’s
a little meaner spirited. There’s also the fact that Sebastian has
the potential to backslide. If he becomes unhappy in the marriage he will
take up smoking again. The implication is very strongly that you’re
to blame for the relapse. But still, there are moments of honesty and
good, open dialogue in this potential match. Just after him is Abigail. We had to fight the urge to put her higher
on the list because she’s one of our favorites. She’s one of the game’s most interesting
characters, but unfortunately that doesn’t make her the most moral. In a lot of ways she’s a fairly average
young woman. She doesn’t get along with her parents,
but she acknowledges that they try and does her best to communicate what she’s feeling
to them. She has morbid interests, but a kind heart. Sure, she likes hanging out in the cemetery,
but she also loves her pet guinea pig. She wants to learn how to fight, but she learns
instead to be cautious. All in all, we find her to be quirky but reasonable. At least, before the wedding. This isn’t a guide, but let us offer you
a piece of advice if you want to marry Abigail. Keep her happy. When she has high hearts and high spirits,
you can enjoy a nice life with her. Sure, she spills blood, but it’s to save
your life. And everything outside of that is pretty wholesome. She likes curling up under an electric blanket. She admires your swordwork (Hey! Mind out of the gutter, we mean literal swords.) She has potentially the best balance when
it comes to expressing admiration and concern, acknowledging that you’re capable but explaining
that she is afraid to lose you when you do dangerous things. She thanks you sweetly for all the work you
do. But when the tides turn and she’s unhappy,
she will let you know. She’s the only character in the game who
will straight up tell you that she could have done better by marrying someone else. She doesn’t seem to be bluffing either,
because she calls Sebastian out by name and says she bets he was the one. That is harsh to hear from your virtual wife
and can crush your little pixelated heart. So seriously, keep this woman happy. She knows just how to hurt you otherwise. Rounding out the tier is Harvey He’s a doctor, which we consider a relatively
noble profession. We even gave credit to his assistant for working
in the clinic. Since he owns the clinic, we feel like we
should also give him credit. Although his motives are hard to get a read
on. Sometimes he seems so obsessed with keeping
the Pelican Town residents healthy that you think he’s ignoring you. Other times (a lot of other times) he brings
up how much more money he makes when they’re not being healthy. Likewise, it doesn’t feel great when you
have money taken from you while unconscious to pay for your treatment should you run out
of health in the mines. We think this is more of a problem with the
medical system in this world than it is with Harvey, specifically. We can’t rest all that blame on his door. But, we would give him a bit more credit for
helping people if he seemed, well, consistently interested in helping them. He actually didn’t even want to be a doctor. This was his fallback plan when his poor eyesight
and acrophobia made his dreams of being a pilot too impractical. Still, there are things to admire about Harvey. We especially like how he takes up the aerobics
class to improve his health. Though he may not be passionate about the
medical field, he is dedicated to it and practices what he preaches. He also spends a lot of time keeping his medical
knowledge current to provide the best care he can. And he is a devoted husband. While this might be a self-esteem issue, because
he never thought he’d get married, the steady attention feels nice. His romance dialogue is more consistent than
his career dialogue, at any rate. He pledges loyalty and affection for life
and really holds up his end of the bargain. Though, this does pass into creepy territory
once or twice depending on which dialogue options are chosen. Finally we have reached The Bad. These are the characters that, for some reason
or another, we would have reservations about tying the knot with. First up is Shane. We could do a whole video in defense of Shane
because we think he gets a worse reputation than he deserves in many regards. He’s clearly struggling more than the other
bachelors and bachelorettes, and we understand why he might not look great to some in comparison. Because we do feel passionately about this,
it really hurt to put him in the bottom tier. What we think makes Shane an exceptional character
is his commitment to change. He has a complete arc in the game, and makes
more personal improvements than all the other characters combined. He starts as a near-suicidal drunk who is
cranky and dismissive. By the end of his Eight Heart Event, he’s
quit drinking, and has started innovating for his family. He has embraced Marnie and Jas, and is happy
to spread that joy to you after working with a counselor to get his life sorted out. He’s even bonded with a chicken named Charlie. It’s a jaw-dropping change, and if that
arc continued into the Ten and Fourteen Heart Events, he may have left with a medal of good. However, we don’t think marriage contributes
anything to Shane’s arc. As a matter of fact, if you pursue that route,
we think it actually makes his story and his character worse. The Ten Heart event is rather neutral but
The Fourteen Heart Event sees the player character doubting his recovery from alcoholism. Though it turns out to be a misunderstanding,
this is less supportive and a more somber note than we’d seen pre-marriage. He’s also not a great husband. Whereas Harvey’s self-esteem issues make
him more attentive as a spouse, Shane’s self doubt manifests as a distance between
you two. He’s the least affectionate both to you
and your children should you have any. (We also hate to say it, but we think he’s
the worst father in the game.) Most of his marriage dialogue is self-deprecating,
more like the Shane we see in the early to mid game, and less like the optimistic Shane
we see at the Eight heart point. Worse still is that he can slide back. If he becomes unhappy in the marriage he will
take up drinking again, and you’ll start seeing snide comments and drunk dialogue. He’ll also ask if he needs to be suspicious
should you continue giving gifts to other marriage candidates. While we think Shane is a great character,
we also believe marriage brings out the worst in him. This is probably one of the unhealthiest relationships
you can enter into in all of Stardew. It’s unfortunate because outside of that
context, he is one of the best people in the game, who tries the hardest. Taking the Bronze Medal of Bad is Leah. She keeps mostly to herself. She forages for food. She does artwork in a small cottage. If you stick with her Heart Events, she has
the potential to make Stardew an artist destination. You may very well be wondering why she’s
in this tier. And why she’s under Shane, at that. It actually all boils down to one event. You’d have to do the event multiple times
to realize her hypocrisy, but unfortunately, we have. During her Ten Heart Event, you and Leah are
confronted by her ex, Kel. Kel is portrayed as a creepy stalker who is
unsupportive and insists that Leah take them back and return to the city to live life as
they had before. There are scenes leading up to this where
we know Kel has been calling and has either shown up at the art show or has been buying
up all of Leah’s paintings online, depending on which route you went. But in the scene you’re presented with two
options. If you punch Kel to defend Leah, she seems
to disapprove, saying that the action was pretty violent. Where this gets hypocritical is in the fact
that if you try to reason with Kel, Leah does the punching instead. Now we don’t mind that she feels the need
to punch an abusive and overbearing ex. More power to her if it’s what she felt
she had to do. But it’s a little infuriating after pursuing
ten hearts with her and having such a deep connection that there’s no dialogue option
that puts you on the same page in a difficult situation like this. It feels so bad to have Leah disapprove of
your protective action. But it feels even worse to try again, see
her get violent, take the blame upon herself, and know that she’d have judged you for
doing the same thing. This is just one event, but because there
are no good options and a weak resolution, it can negatively impact the feel of the romance
arc. It also calls into question Leah’s consistency
of character. While it might be a forgivable offense, Leah
being a loner means that again, we don’t get to see many of her interactions with other
characters. She’s not necessarily a community-minded
person. It means that while she’s very, very sweet
with her dialogue options, there aren’t a lot of good deeds to counteract the bad
taste of this moment. Taking the Silver Medal of Bad is Alex. Alex also has an arc, which we feel didn’t
benefit from the Fourteen Heart Event. Like Shane, Alex peaks earlier on, at right
about Ten Hearts. When you meet him, he’s very much the stereotypical
movie jock. He might get your name wrong. He can be condescending. He mostly talks about himself, his physical
prowess, and his future of playing ball professionally. We also feel like we can’t overlook the
weird sexism that lingers just under the surface of his character. If you play as a female, he assumes that you
can’t throw a football. He’ll also ask you if you have a bikini
when inviting you to the beach, and will generally be a creepy guy from time to time. He does have a tragic backstory that helps
put some of his poor behavior into context. His father was abusive, his mother died, and
he had a rough childhood all in all. This doesn’t entirely excuse all of his
actions though, and you’d think if anything it would have taught him to respect women
earlier on. Still, he comes a long way over the course
of the game. He opens up to you and eventually you even
see him crying about his mother, exposing that he does have a more sensitive side. He also apologizes for not being as kind as
he could have been when the two of you first started talking. He continues trying to improve himself. We know he’s never been afraid of hard work,
but throughout the heart events we see him starting to tackle new challenges. He decides to start reading and studying instead
of putting all his focus toward athletics. We think the sweetest moment with Alex is
shortly after you start dating, right when you get to the ten heart event. He allows himself to be really open and plans
a private date for you. This is probably one of the most romantic
moments with any character in the game, to his credit. But we would have loved to see that progression
continue after marriage. Unfortunately it does not. Marrying Alex, you learn that he essentially
gives up on ever reading anything, despite constantly reminiscing about his promise to
do so. He never again acknowledges the poor treatment
in the earlier game, or addresses the role that sexism played in that (where applicable.) His fourteen heart event was also lackluster. He asks you for 5,000 gold so he can install
a TV in the Saloon. It’s not a terrible idea, and it’s a generous
enough gift to Gus. But it’s a far step away from the confiding
cutscenes that made dating him so appealing. Our Gold Medal of Bad goes to Haley. Again. No judgment if you like being negged by pretty
women. We’re sure there are players who are into
that. In which case, Haley is undoubtedly the spouse
for you. She’s gorgeous, and she will insult you. That’s pretty much her whole deal. But it doesn’t make her a good person. She starts off as one of the meanest, most
inconsiderate NPCs of the game, and she never learns anything. Her character arc was, at best, lackluster,
and at worst, nonexistent. She’s childish, snobby, selfish and generally
inconsiderate. She takes advantage of her sister Emily who
does all the work in the house. When she’s asked to contribute (still less
than her fair share) she acts as though she’s being incredibly burdened. The financial situation in the house isn’t
made entirely clear. What we do know is that Emily works to bring
money into the household while Haley has a shopping addiction. She claims at different times to have 100
pairs of shoes and 1,000 skirts. Yikes. She’s also expressed an interest in fast-fashion,
meaning that she turns over those looks every season. She has to be spending an outrageous amount
of money and we don’t know where it comes from. Here’s another fun fact; Haley is the only
character that is actively easier to romance on a Joja run of the game than a Community
Center run. Because Joja sells sunflower seeds as its
one reduced rate item, and sunflowers are Haley’s favorite gift, pursuing Haley inadvertently
encourages you to sell out to the big evil corporation. Most of her Heart-Events are her asking for
your help. Most of her sentimental attachments are to
objects, not people. Even her compliments are backhanded beyond
belief. In her defense, her Fourteen Heart Event does
show that she’s capable of charitable acts. In comparison to Shane and Alex whose last
events seemed to fall flat, this is a big point in her favor. But back to our original point of her not
treating the player character well, she will bully you into participating if you deny her
request to help with the event initially. Another thing in her favor (we think?) is
that she’s the most physically affectionate of the spouses – male or female. This also makes her the least PG character
in an overall tame and wholesome experience. We could actually see that argument being
used on either side depending on whether or not you like Haley. What it boils down to is that she just thinks
of herself first and foremost. It’s a rare, and unattractive trait in Pelican
Town. WRAP-UP That’s been it, everyone! Our list of potential Stardew Valley Spouses
from Good to Evil. Let us know who’s your favorite to romance
in the comments down below. Also be sure to let us know what other video
topics you’d like to see covered. While you’re down there don’t forget to
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